UPDATED: Parents Spoiled Their Golden Child All Their Life & Ignored me...She Got Them in
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 24 ก.ย. 2024
- UPDATED: Parents Spoiled Their Golden Child All Their Life & Ignored me...She Got Them in an Infinite Debt & Now They're Trying to Put That Debt on me by Saying THIS
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Growing up, we were 3 siblings. The eldest was my brother (28 ml), I (26 fml) was the middle child, and then the youngest was my sister (23 fml). I don't remember much, as we were very young back then. From what my brother told me, things started to change right after my sister was born. In no way did we blame her, though. When I was a kid, I was quite happy to have another sibling to play with.
Story 1: I just love it when the parents of golden children get a healthy dose of Karma. Remember, raising a golden child is a life time commitment. It does not end when they become adults. Also.... You play favorites with your kids, they gonna play favorites with you as adults..... And you won't be their favorite.
But anyway.... OP real parents (Aunt and Uncle) are the real MVPs in this story.
Ultimate form of abuse is the scapegoat/ golden child dynamic. The first will end up seeing you as useless, and the second becomes useless.
Golden child syndrome is such a strange phenom
I posted above that when favoritism is that extreme it means that the parents do not love ANY of their children. They do not even truly love the "golden" child.
Loving someone means providing them safety, stability and a nurturing environment. That did not at all happen in this story.
It starts with the parents who are narcissists who feed on others' pain. It's a roll of the dice as to which child will be the golden child. In this case, the parents were so invested in this illusion that they became entrapped emotionally and financially.
@@Zurround Don't forget discipline. At the end of the day your first duty as a parent is to turn out a confident young adult ready to take their place in society.
@@barneytaylor9338 true but that is kind of under the umbrella of boundaries and morality.
not finished story 1 yet but OPs aunt and uncle are absolute angels
Yes, they are.
Agreed and off his parents should be dragged into the deepest darkest most degrading and torturous part of the infernal pit
100% they absolutely deserve to be called parents over Op and her brother’s sperm and egg donors
Parents that pick a favorite child are a complete waste and shouldn’t be parents
I'm still in shock that the abusive parents had the gall to call their victims for money. Geez.
I think I've seen their balls in front of my local Target 🎯 store. 😂
Some people are just like that. Does a leech ask why before it attaches to a host?
@@anonmouse15 Fair point. 😆
O.P. should have retained a lawyer . The lawyer could have sent a cease and desist letter.
While I agree, it seems the former family got the message. The threat of being sued on top of so much debt is a strong motivator.
Story 1 OP could've easily said "since it's a loan, what are you offering as collateral? And before you get your hopes up, the collateral needs to be 5x the value of the loan and a assessor needs to confirm the value of the item you're offering"
very recently a 13 year old was lured away by a predator. (her among many but this made the news) so educate her on social media, make sure she knows you love her so predators don't pretend to fill the love she's lacking, and let her online but be in touch with her friends' parents.
Having a blanket ban on social media can be worse when it comes to predators because if your kid has to make an account in secret, then you can't monitor something you don't know about, and your hyperbolic attitude can make the kid think that any sense of danger is minimal or non-existent and thus not take proper precautions.
@@djdomain exactly. I would rather a kid know how to skydive than attempt it in secret completely ignorant of the dangers.
It is due to news like this I had gotten after my man's niece on how she was playing with fire doing just that. Her mom reamed me out. On the other hand, their other two sisters were on my side defending what I did was to try and keep his niece out of trouble. She was only 13 at the time.
@@SuzetteKath the thing is social media can be good. chat with friends, don't tie up the phone lines, keep in touch with friends that had to move etc school work... one of the things they really hammered in 10 or 20 years ago was "don't meet people online in rl." it seems we need to hammer that in every year because there's always new kids.
kids don't have a lot of the life experiences to see the red flags. I wouldn't keep them offline but I would definitely keep an eye and talk to my kid a lot.
S1 My eyes were moist when I read that early teen OP cried when neighbors gave her and older brother presents for Xmas! I can remotely understand parents not liking foster kids, kid born to one parent thru love affair, etc but 2 kids born legit to this couple? WTF!
S1: The uncle and aunt got their just reward for being awesome people when both OP and brother casually and simult asked them whether they could call them dad and mom?!
OP's brother did make one mistake, IMO.
He should have told them, "I'll show up for your funerals, but only to p*** on your graves!"
Favoritism when it gets THAT EXTREME is a MENTAL SICKNESS. It is a mistake to assume that the parents "only" love the "favored" child or even love them the most. Someone that sick cannot really love anyone. Loving someone does NOT mean letting them get away with whatever they want and spoiling them rotten. Truly loving someone means teaching them proper morality and proper boundaries AND it means providing them with a safe, nurturing and stable ENVIRONMENT. Making the home such a toxic environment does not do that either. The "favored" child is just a PRIZED TROPHY to parents like this. As far as proper parental love is concerned they do not love the favored child any more than the unfavored ones that they treat badly.
I actually found it shocking that golden child got a job that isn't common
How some parents can treat their own children like that - i will never understand! smh
Thank you for such supportive uncle and aunt , who were observant, considerate and assumed action and responsibility ( which was not their's)
Ahh classic 'i was a douchebag to my loved ones for a good majority of their lives to the point it caused trauma, and now needs help from those same traumatized loved ones after years of no contact and not speaking with one another'....too bad they're gonna get screwed over with that attitude, and I root for it
1st story, OP, your birth parents and sister got themselves into their debt, and they can get themselves out. OP NTA.
Story 3: ''That's how she was raised'' is not permission to ruin another generation. Keep her poison away from your kids, and thanks for being a great dad!
Ppl. When you control yr kids on internet, youtube, tiktok, snapchat. They said we are abusive, control freak. When kids go haywire, addicted to internet, stupid pranks in tiktok, snapchat goes out of control. They said, parents don't do enough to control the kids. Wtf. Ppl shld know how to shut their mouth.
The ex-parents are going to work themselves to death. You all know the jobs they're working are probably the ones that suck the life out of a person. It'll age then twice as fast if not more, leading them to an earlier grave.
To say nothing of what will become of the golden child. I highly doubt she had any real world training before all this, so who knows where she will end up.
Story 2: social media is not needed to survive. Those were crappy friends and that opinion response was an even crappier response considering that was an adult chiming in 😂
Story 3
What did I just hear?
So wife is a sahm.... OP makes enough for them all to be comfortable.
He likes to buy things for those he loves. But it doesn't sound like it is outrageous stuff. Meaning not entitled level
What is the problem? 🤔
His mother is a crazy, jealous harpy who wants her son to give his money to her. And she wants to see his wife and step-child suffer.
The MIL is a nutter. Some are like that. If she didn't have this, she'd have concentrated on something else because she lives for drama.
I would have loved to hear the egg/sperm donors' explanation of how the two kids were responsible for their debt
Probably blame them for damage the golden child did in the childhood that they punished the OP and brother for.
Kids don’t need to be on Snapchat or “snatch-chat” as I call it… nor do they need to be on tiktok without supervision… sorry people but our kids need less social media and more social interactions!!! Stop leaving your child to be socialized through apps! It’s actually is promoting anti-social behaviors!
Keeping her away from it isn't teaching her responsibility and control
Story 1
So your younger sister became the golden child,I don't why your parents changed and ignored you and your brother,I think that this toxic change and of course you sister caught on quickly to the state of affairs so she used you and your brother as Scape goats so your parents abused you and even ignored you when you where sick
Thanks the gods your aunt and uncle rescued you,it was a rescue you where blessed to be adopted by them your parents should never contact you or your brother again but I think that they will reappear when you thrive as adults and your parents will expect money for the golden child and their debts
You should never speak to those abusive people ever I would not even attend their funerals
WONDERFUL FAMILY MEMBERS STILL EXIST &
WILLING TO MAKE POSITIVE
CHANGES IN CHILDRENS'
LIVES!!!
I have always been honest and blunt with my daughter, straight to the point, easy to understand language. I talked with her about drugs (I'm a recovering addict 15 years clean), talked to her about pregnancy, the what and how's of how you can get pregnant and all the ways to prevent it. With that sai, when she got her first IPhone we had a long and in depth talk about being responsible with information and pictures. I told her nothing ever gets erased from the web. I also told her to never ever take pictures of herself that she wouldn't want the world to see. I told her to never send any scandalous pictures to anyone, girl or boy, I told her how nothing in this world is 100% safe. I also told her if she did and the picture got passed around, I don't want to hear her cry about it because I have drilled it over and over in her head to not do it.
I wish we could deliver vigilante justice to all of the veruca salts and their parents. We'd tie up the golden children and make them watch as someone deliver a beating to their parent(s). Then while they're broken we'll take a pistol and make the child choose which parent gets it and which survives. Then shoot a blank at the chosen and tell them "now you know what it's like to be the least favorite."
I'm kinda messed up lol, might have something to do with the fact that I have 4 golden children siblings with me as the scapegoat because of my autism
Story 3'
Your mother seems to believe she's entitled to tell you what she should and should not do , she a toxic women and not worth keeping in your life and she should learn to behave in a decent manner your mother wants you to give her the money she selfish and mean and toxic she trying to manipulate you because she believes you should be giving her your money she jealous and you cannot change her
And the relatives enabling her by telling OP "it was how she was raised". If I was raised in an abusive household it doesn't give me the right to abuse others later.
I've listened to do many of your stories but keep forgetting the like button. I'm trying to remember now. Thank you. Your posts are so clear, concise and precise. Great diction.
It helps that she now has a final comment which allows you to click the like button if you haven't yet.
Thanks for listening!!
Story 3: You're a great husband and father ❤ I could NEVER be a SAHM, it's not in me at all!
Story 1: Gor all those wondering why the parents accused the other children for their debt: The OP and her brother are classic scapegoatd. By definition, a scapegoat gets blamed for what the scapegoat didn't do. This is how it works.
Hi How are you Taz. Good I hope. Have a Fantastic Day or Night wherever you are. Best wishes from Australia. 🌹🦋🇦🇺
S2 NTA your doing your job parenting your child.
2nd story: "Not your home, not your marriage. Stay in your lane Mom."
I will call BS on this story because the obvious solution for the bioparents is to file for bankruptcy in their situation, not lose everything.
she reminds me of a Amy before she grew up and met sheldon
Story 3: it seems like op’s mother determines someone’s worth based on their job, because they seemed to have a good relationship before wife became stay at home mom.
story 1: aint karma a beech
Story one. I’m pretty sure sister didn’t get rid of her clothes and shoes and purses etc
I would be fine letting my teens on Facebook or Instagram, but not snapchat
Hello all
Story 2- If your older teenager can't be trusted with a cell phone, you already failed and you're too late. It is rich that you want to start parenting now.
if you don't know that snap is a main communication channel under younger people while you have a child shows you have 0 interest in your child.
i wonder what OP did to communicate does she only write letters cause her parents probably never used e-mail as teenagers so wonder if she did or did her parents not let her.
3 story. She has step mother syndrome.
S3: I am a firm believer that behavior plays more of an important role in “families” than blood ever does.
Blood equals family seems to always be a huge crock of manure.
How you are treated by family either makes you or breaks you.
Blood parents usually use it to manipulate or guilt a person into giving them what they want. Along with, a recognition of how they may have “mistreated” you but now if you only do this one thing for them they will start to treat you better.
Little Sister needed an unfortunate wood chipper accident.
I would've waited until that brat of a little sister went to sleep and then tenderize her sorry carcass with a framing hammer or meat mallet. That's how much rage I am feeling right now.
You/OP lost me at OP getting lose clothes that didn’t fit from her younger sister. Unless the youngest was a giant, or OP was starved for years to the extent her growth was severely stunted (in which case someone should have called CPS long before now) that doesn’t make sense.
The clothes she got from her sister didn't fit. I belive OP liked her clothes lose.
Story 2
You should not allow her to have snap chat she can get in contact with what's app she should have a parental lock the thing is you need to warn her that the thirteen years old boy could be a thirty years old man and never to send photos because they never disappear
You can not block it all together but I would recommend the modern extented version of stranger danger.
I had that talk many years ago with my kids, it was not too bad then but still... we made agreements on what was acceptable and what not It resulted in my kids running diwn the stairs telling le they found this "weird" website .... and that is what you want.
I ould suggest you both get snapchat and join the group, so you can be the silent presence without meddling, but still keep her safe.
I know it is not easy to navigate all that new stuff but you have to dive in to understand your child's life.
Good luck.
Oh yes, raise teenage daughters by hiding things from them and forbidding things related. That will never blow out in your face.
Last story. NtA. You're the parent. Social media is damaging.