But I mean if breediots do not breed like wild unconscious animals, who would the mountain lions and other predator animals kill? What about demons, who will the demons possess, harass ? Who will inhale, eat and drink the poisoned air/food/water if breediots stop breeding ? Who will the 'organized' exploit, use, abuse, molest, torture, work to death and murder if breediots start becoming non-deplorable, moral, ethical, logical, rational, non-narcissistic, non-selfish, non-sadist, non-child-haters, non-terrorist-oppressing tyrant DICKtators by refusing to breed like animals, aka having responsible sex? WHO ?? just WHO??? Who is going to drink all the poisonous coffee made with poisoned water, who sill use all the legal and illegal drugs and who will ingest/inject all the pharmaceuticals if breediots don't provide new consumers/victims and perpetrators ? Breediots are KEY to EVERY industrial CONplex. Without breediots ALL industrial CONplexes would go broke within a year. How will the priesthood, through the cemetery industrial complex keep making trillions each year if breediots stop providing them fresh dead meat via breeding ? The creation AND perpetuation of death, suffering, exploitation and slavery MUST be continued via breeding like unconscious animals by breediots, it is their duty and their coping mechanism to being bored to death, lonely, purposeless, sadists, terrorists, tyrants, megalomaniacs, power tripping control freaks, virtue signallers, cognitive dissonance, low IQ.
Honestly... I’m too selfish. Once you have kids it’s a different lifestyle. I like kids from a far but I also don’t have patience.I also don’t like how other women make my lifestyle of not having children “less” important either.
Male. Childfree since 14 (I never liked kids even when I was one). Nearing 25 and still haven't changed my mind. I'd rather be engaging in leisure, traveling, and working on a satisfying career. I only need my friends to keep me company.
I was more or less your age when I decided. I was told repeatedly "you'll change your mind." I didn't - not in my 20s or 30s, and now in my 40s, still not.
Saw many who have children that was somewhat miserable. All said the same thing..they didn't regret having them but wished the had waited (even tho' it sounds like regret to me) Yes, they're struggling. Me? like the saying goes ''i can do bad by my damn-self''
It's more acceptable for men not to want children, but I know men do get some pressure from society and family as well as they get older. However, hop into the body of a woman and magnify that pressure by 10000.
I don't understand the selfish part. Like if I don't want to have children how does it make me selfish? Is it selfish to be happy? To live for yourself?
Selfish is having children to live through or expect them to take care of you when you're old. I've worked in nursing homes and the majority of the residents have children and never see or hear from them.
I think it's important to recognize that in order for an action to be selfish, someone has to be suffering as a result of said action. Not having children doesn't negatively impact anyone around you so it can't be considered selfish. :) Thank you for admitting you don't like children! haha
@@gbrieannful Personal life choices should never be made for other people. Not having a child will not impact them in any negative way. I would understand for the partner, this is why it should be talked about in the very beggining of the relationship. But I'm definitely not gonna go through parenthood because my parents want to be grandparents. It's gonna be affecting MY life and the child's life. I'm not gonna have a baby so my parents can have a cute little doll to play with twice a month. And my parents wishing to be grandparents will never make up for all the reasons why I don't want children.
I'm 44 and debt-free with a Master's degree and in a director level job. Being child free by choice made all the difference to my education and career, and my husband and I almost never fight. It's amazing what you can do when you put yourself first. I'm sorry your mom can't see that and support you for who you are. Maybe she will come around one day.
The child-free life is GREAT-I am 36 & will NEVER have them! A few people tried to tell me to have them & if you want to shut them up, all you have to say is "Since you feel the need to tell me how to live my life I'll make you a deal, I will have a kid/multiple kids & then you can raise them for me" haha
I have always felt that I don´t want kids. I´ve never imagined what kind of mom I would be. I had the best mom ever, so it has nothing to with bad childhood like some people think. I just really need my freedom, I want to do what I want when I want, and I don´t really like children or enjoy spending time around them. I would lose my mind if a baby woke me up at night and would need me all the time. I´m just so happy that I realised this before having any kids. I´m free my whole life :)
Yes things are a little scary . I feel like everyone should feel comfortable making whatever decision suits their lifestyle . Thanks for sharing your thoughts !
Omg yes so true. I'm in my twenties and still don't want kids at all. I always hear that I will change my opinion on that but it just become stronger. I just don't see myself giving birth and become a mom and take all the reponsibility. Also I don't want to pass on my genes and diseases. I barely function on my own like how could I take enough care of a whole other human or even give birth in the first place and get through the pregnancy itself. But people just don't get it and I feel like the society expects women to become mothers :/
I agree with u 100%! I think kids are such a big responsibility if u want to rise them right. I have one friend who only wants kids to take care of her..thats not even guaranteed bc many dont even help their parents. Like u said we could change our mind but for now nope.
Yeah exactly . Some children will move away from their parents in adulthood so you never really know what’s going to happen. It’s tricky. Thanks for sharing your thoughts !
I'll be 30 in a couple of months, I'm married (straight), have a dog, and no interest in having kids. I've questioned the norm since I was a teenager, but was always dismissed, as you mentioned. Myself and my husband have a bit more of a complicated situation besides just being childfree, but suffice it to say it is such a relief not to have to plan our lives around having children. TBH I've also realized in the past while that I don't really like kids that much... even the well-behaved ones. I just don't have the patience for all of the questions and chaos. Rest assured there are other women like you out there with a similar stance! Thanks for making this video!
Same! I rather maybe regret not having kids than having them any regretting them. Also, the complications even in "normal" pregnancies and births is so f'ing high! I like kids, but i'd rather be a cool aunt or godmother and spoil them for a few hours before giving them back.
I'm 28 and CF by choice. I just don't want kids, I'm way too comfortable and would never trade this life for a life of responsibility, exhaustion and sacrifice. And if you think about it, I don't need to. The world is full of 7.8 billion people and most of them will procreate, there is no need for ME to contribute. In fact, more people should think like us as to not f*ck this planet up irreversibly...
If they want kids and there partner doesn't want kids. And they stay with there partner and don't have them. Maybe they don't really want kids very much. If its something they can just let go of
I'm 28. I only want kids if I can afford them, and if I have a husband that I really trust. I had a bad phase in childhood because of my Dad's mental illness, and that affects my outlook too. I don't plan on being perfect, but I would want my kids to have some stability.
Sending you a warm pat on the back for standing your ground and taking care of yourself 💖. I don't receive much pressure because I have made it clear to everyone around me that I would just cut them off if they kept on pestering me. However, where I am from, it is expected to have children. Highly expected. When you get married, people say to you "have 7 boys and 7 girls" as the traditional way to congratulate you. The pressure is heavy on women and I can totally get that it takes a lot of courage, in general, to go against the norm. So, well done you 💖!
I think the person they want to be with is more important. Like if they want kids and they was with a partner who couldn't have kids. Or didn't want kids some people would still stay with the partner and just let it go and not have them
That’s the life I want. I want to go on vacation and work a nice job with plenty of hours without having to find someone to watch my kids. Being responsible for another person alone scares the crap out of me. I’m glad my mom agrees with my choice to not have kids and I already warned her no grandkids. Who even said she wanted to be a grandma? Lol. Even if she did want me to have kids and I didn’t want kids, I’d go through with my choice to not have them regardless of what she wants bc they would be my kids and my responsibility at the end of the day and not hers.
Kids and babies scare me. I don’t want to be responsible for another human being. It is important to know what you REALLY want and what you really DON’T want. People need to understand there’s more than just the newborn stage and that you’re legally responsible for it until about 18 years old. So no I won’t be having kids which isn’t anyone else’s issue. I want to do things that I want to do. Being responsible for someone else is a main factor. There’s nothing wrong with not wanting the responsibility of kids.
And pets are easier to take care of than kids. I’ve held my niece when she was a newborn before and it is a SCARY feeling bc she was so fragile and that made me realize that I shouldn’t have kids. Babies are very fragile.
I’m 43 & child feee. I fractured my pelvic when I was 20. I have all kinds of titanium holding me in place. It’s not in the cards for me, as of now. I am 43. I also suffered a brain injury that severely damaged my level of patience, my hat is off to mothers! You rock!
I think the person they want to be with is more important. Like if they want kids and they was with a partner who couldn't have kids or didn't want kids. Some people would still reather be with the partner. And just let it go and not have kids
I feel same way been with fiancee for 10 half years I do not want kids my niece and nephew for me I am almost 38 in June so not want children time soon I love nephew and baby niece that all can handle in my life
tbh giving that pregnancy irreversibly changes your brain....... i think it should 1000% be the person who's gonna go through it's decision, not anyone else's
Not only that but it can permanently damage your body and even kill you. Plus research shows that fetus cells will actually lodge themselves in the woman's brain to manipulate her more.
I am relating to EVERYTHING you are saying! Thank you for posting this video. Make more like it! The mother relationship, the body image issues...I know mothers who love being parents yet they will admit that everything that fucked you up in your childhood is exacerbated when you have your own children. You relive that trauma and sometimes in trying to be exactly like the opposite of your parents, you do new damage. What a messy business: having children haha.
I don't think people should leave there partner. Just because there partner can't have kids or doesn't want kids. I think the partner is more important
Stay strong! My mom is the same way. Always mentioning left n right "maybe one day ill have grandkids. Why dont you want to have a baby? Oh u and your husband would have such a cute little boy.." blablabla... shutup mom. Is she gonna raise them? NO. So she gets NO grandkids.
The irony of all these "Who's gonna take care of you when you're old?!" is that practically ALL of them REFUSE to take care of their own parents. Because "I can't! I have my OWN family to worry about!". And then those people really just... 404 and stare blankly.
I want kids but I won't unless I can actually afford them. Growing up I watched my single mom struggle to pay bills, buy a ton of groceries, do allll the chores by herself with no help, etc. We managed and she was a great mom, but I can remember soooo many times feeling guilty after we bought popcorn at the theatre, or a DVD a Walmart. One time my grandma offered to buy us new movies (DVD) and my sibling chose an expensive new one that just came out. I remember whispering to my sibling we couldn't afford that and could only grab from the discounted dollar bin. My sibling refused, not seeing what I saw. My grandma saw us bickering and said "It's okay. It's okay." But deep down I knew it wasn't. I remember being 9 and wishing I was older so I could get a job and help pay for bills so we wouldn't be poor anymore. Kids shouldn't have to feel like that, or worry about money.
Hi! Thanks a lot for this video. Im from argentina, and actually I am currently going through a separation with my partner of the last ten years, because i dont want to have kids. Its very sad, but ill be totally selfish to me to have a kid with the only reason for dont break the relationship. We need much people like you saying trulie facts about be parents. In my country the society dont think deeply whats mean have a child in a unstable economy. And here "born" a lot of problems, like crimes and violency. Thanks a lot for this videos. And sorry for my english. Cheers!
Thank you for making this video. Hopefully seeing the out pour of support from the childfree community let's you know that you are not alone. We're here for you.
It's good that, more and more people don't want children by their choice. It's a win win situation for everyone. People who don't want children are happy. The government are happy as population is being controlled. People who want children, gets more resources for their children, as there are no other children and they are happy too. Everyone is happy. Actually we have to motivate more and more people to not have children.
I've always wanted children, and it's hard knowing I can't, but I know I would be miserable. I naturally worry and it would be too much and too overwhelming for me. As well, the state of the world is not good and I'm not sure it will get better. Climate change with overpopulation is ruining the planet and life is stressful.
it's so nice to hear explanations on this point of view. wish me luck when i tell my parents i don't want kids either. yikes. im an only child so they have a ton of expectations
So what? Screw their expectations. Your life is YOURS. I told my mother I didn't want kids and she gave the same response that all breeding sheep do that I will "change my mind". 🙄 Guess what? She went to her grave with no grandkids from me.
With the whole "children taking care of their parents when they're old thing" I really hope it's not solely my responsibility (I'm an only child with 2 parents who already smoke and live an unhealthy lifestyle e.g. rarely wearing sunscreen, not being physically active, highly stressed because they are workaholics) I really hope other family members help them when they're elderly or they have nurses. I really hope that they die suddenly like a heart attack as opposed to cancer. I've experienced a family member dying of cancer it's physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually EXHAUSTING. When my nana had cancer (she died about a year ago) I had never been so anxiety filled in my life! I'm not excited for my parents or anyone to get old so having children for that sole purpose is not only selfish but also extremely cruel.
It's not your responsibility to care for your parents in their old age, ESPECIALLY when they are deliberately living an unhealthy lifestyle. Screw that. Show them that if the only reason that they had you was to be a caretaker to them in old age, they will be sorely disappointed.
Thank you. 56 and childfree. Love my freedom. I don't like kids and prefer animals. I am a bit annoyed as my brother has a kid now and they are restricting my freedom sometimes. So you can be an aunt and your freedom gets slowly taken away.I do help out mainly as I had narc parents and I hate abusive parents. There are a lot of CF people who don't use adequate protection and end up having a baby if they don't want it. I always got my bf to have protection and it protects me from STDs too I don't want to be killed or injured in childbirth too. I hate the indignity of childbirth. Humans damage the planet ie nature and they rape and murder people too. Humans are a pest in society. I am lucky in that my mother fully supports me in being childfree. She told me she hated a lot of things about being a parent.
Why is your freedom affected because your brother had a kid? That is his and his partner's problem. Put your big girl pants on, open your mouth and say NO. I wish my siblings would expect me to help out and babysit their kids because I am child free. F*ck that. They are lucky if I send birthday and Christmas presents. They chose their life and I chose mine.
When I was younger I definitely wanted kids, but life got in the way, the romance department didn't really go my way and now as I am approaching the late 30s I feel that ship has sailed, at least in terms of bio kids. I don't think I would want to get pregnant at this stage in my life. I might go the fostering route later on, and I wouldn't mind a step-parent role if a future partner were to already have kids. But I am pretty okay now with not having kids. It was where life took me and I kinda like my life.
Hi there, I was a fence-sitter for 10 years after getting married. I was very ambivalent about it.. But everytime my husband and would seriously talk about it and even tried few times. A feeling of dread and panick would come over me. Id take a pregnancy test and would feel total relief about not being pregnant. Im 42 and now know to always trust my instincts. I ve come to the conclusion that children were not for me, the desire was not strong enough to make such life changing decision for 3 people( myself, hubby and baby)and I have made peace with that decision. Of course, there are a bunch of more serious reasons for my decision but the comment would be too long g.
I just didn't think about having a kid. After I left my mom's house, I have so much independence. I don't have big sister standing over me to tell me to clean this or do the dishes. I can go out whenever I want. Fired from job, I don't care, I don't have children to feed. I can go to Grand Canyon next week, just hop on the plane. I avoided men... one of them be like... learn to cook for me... I'm like hell no. I am living with my mom... She's not strict... she won't divorce me because she loves me... I can do whatever I want. I'm 50 years old... Yeah my mom has me and my sister, we are all grown up.... but I wouldn't want a child like my sister, nephew and me. My child would look like me and I know the father of my child ain't gonna be handsome. 50 years later, they'll be fat, ugly and old working at a regular job...
Thanks for your video! I could totally relate! You’re the first child free related video I’ve watched in the past couple of days that also mentioned about our love/hate relationship with our body! 😩
At the end of the day, we each have to live by our decisions, good, bad, or indifferent, it's your life and yours alone, you can't, nor should you try and please everyone all throughout the day, live your own life as you see fit for you, and as long as you and your partner/fiance treat each other with dignity, love and respect, I say, who the f cares about what others think, I certainly don't. I respect ya'lls decision, I hope for only the best for ya'll. Take care.
I don't want to have kids or get married. Sometimes I feel like Im asking for too much and going to end up alone 😣. I really can't help that I feel this way though and i fear i wont be able to find anyone.
I always felt the same way and still do...while my son turns 5 this week lol I was very young and had to work my way through personal trauma while raising a kid in toxic family households moving to a different couch every 4 months
I agree 100% I’m 33 and never wanted kids and still stick by it. It’s hard because my partner wants kids so we will have to see how well he accepts this in the long haul. Also, I love animals and being around them is so fulfilling and brings lots of happiness and peace into my life.
I think the partner is more important. Like if they want kids and they was with a partner who couldn't have kids or didn't want kids. Some people would reather stay with the partner and accept it
Opposite for me. I used to not want kids but my heart and mind has changed but unfortunately I’m almost 30 and was unfortunate to never meet the right one :( so I don’t think kids will happen for me, cuz I personally wouldn’t want to be a single mom. Kutos to women who are but I want a partner to raise kids. Why bring a child into the world and not give them a father ? If it happens it happens for some ppl fine but why do it purposely?
Too bad so many women don't think like you. They just breed indiscriminately with any jerk that puts a bunch in their oven. Kudos to the women who look at the world around them, then deeply contemplate important decisions before acting. I applaud you ma'am. 👏🏽 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
As a guy still undecided. if I want to be child free or not. Its a good thing we live in a society that now wants to normalize "child free choice" and "wants to adopt kids" choice. I was always against stigma of person not wanting to have child. Although before I had questions why other chooses that. But as I grew I realize that the world is a complicated place. And its scientific that when population increase. Psychologically and physically human will automatically evolve to either not wanting to have kids or will be attracted to same sex. What other super religous people don't realize that we are programed to be 10 billion in population when we reach that peak our body would evolve to lessen its population hence why LGBT and child free people are increasing. Especially we are at peak of 10 bilion in either 2050 or 2060. So our body is just adjusting. Its normal even in some animals that have high population, same gender relationship or animals not wanting to have kids will increase. That is why even though I believe in evolution, I still believe in Higher power that implants order in us. And ironically enough religous people stigmatising the LGBT and child free by choice people are the ones creating the disorder.
I relate to you soooo so much! I'm 25 married and am child free. I'm extremely introverted and sometimes struggle with my mental health and anxiety and it's hard to imagine having to care for a child when I can barely take care of myself some days. I also love animals and I grit my teeth when my inlaws encourage their baby and kids to hit my bird's cage. It makes me cringe because of the lack of respect for my pets. I guess I'm a little over protective of my animals but they're my "babies". Haha maybe that's where all my "maternal instinct" went. They of course keep asking me to have a baby but I'm firm in my "No" and no explanation end of discussion every time it comes up. 😅
@@jaleesa00 it really makes me angry when people think it's okay to harrass my animals for their entertainment. Once my Bil and Sil took my birds to their floor and gave them to their kids to play with while me and my husband were out for the day. I was fuming mad because they never asked! I've resorted to locking the cage and keeping them in my room because they won't listen to me when I tell them to stop scaring my birds. It's infuriating! 😤
Why do we need anyone's validation though? Sure we'd like some understanding and respect, but people can be jerks. So why do we need their validation in choosing to be childfree.
Not wanting children is NOT selfish, having children IS... There are no unselfish reasons to want children, try to think of only one, you can't as it's always a mean to an end... If people stopped for a second and thought about it seriously they'd realize that having children is throwing someone into a perpetual game of russian roulette without even asking them...
Seriously! The creation of life was the single greatest sin ever committed, and I for one, could never willingly commit such an atrocity against another.
SAME. Unfortunately I also don't find a partner that is childfree and I don't want to be with someone until they really want to have children. It's a lonely path, but I'm okay with it
I had a big family growing up. It was such a distress living with 5 other siblings. I love my little family members but I also like sending them back home. I'm never having kids. I get loving them like no other thing in the world, but it's just not in my heart for something that doesn't exist. 1 kid= 1 exist.
Can we see your Guinea Pigs? Family and/or friends really need to realise to not put pressure on mainly women to have kids, just respect the childfree choice and carry on with enjoying the company of that person
When you start to live with a baby you understand that is not for you, my nephew is too young, he can't speak and he cries and screams a lot, I don't regret my decision, I'm 33, childfree, I want a tubal ligation, I don't have a boyfriend but I'm scared of being pregnant in the future if I have a boyfriend in the future, I take a lot of medicine and I don't want a surprise because my contraceptive pills don't work, that's my worst nightmare.
I'm 27 and I considered being child free for a few years. I had a lot of negative attitudes about parenting. But my partner had kids already and we had so much fun together as a family I decided I wanted to expand our family. So now I have 1 bio kid and I'm thinking having 2 is a good number for me. Including my step kids will be 4 kids, it might sound crazy & there's definitely sacrifice but it's a fun and meaningful life!
@Sarah Dyer-Harrell Thing is, if you date someone with kids you'll never be your SO's number one in their life. You will always be taking a backseat. You also cannot live anywhere you want to, you have to stay around the the mom/dad of the child. You will also have to deal with a possible crazy ex trying to wreck your relationship because they are jealous. They have a potential weapon chaining down the person you love. It really is not worth it. If their children are adults, you could still get stuck with the grandkids.
I am 65. Although I have never been married and I don't have any kids, I strongly disagree when I hear people say that they don't want to have kids because this is a terrible place to raise kids, the environment, overpopulation, and so forth. This world has been a terrible place for centuries. And yet, people still have kids. My grandparents were raised during World War I. My parents were raised during the Great Depression and World War II. I was raised during the Vietnam War. The drug culture. The assassinations of both the Kennedy brothers, Martin Luther King, Malcom X, and Medgar Evers. The riots in the cities and on college campuses. Protests against the Vietnam War. Draft card burnings. The murders of those eight student nurses in Chicago by Richard Speck. The Bay of Pigs Invasion. The Cuban Missile Crisis. The University of Texas tower shootings by Charles Whitman. The Manson Family murders. The Kent State Shootings. And so forth. I didn't think take into consideration the tragic events of both the 60's and the 70's as the reasons why I didn't want to have kids. I took into consideration that I don't have patience with children. I was raised in a conservative Catholic Church family of 8 kids. Six brothers, one sister, and myself. Four of my brothers are mentally handicapped. But unfortunately, one of them passed away back in July of 2000. It wasn't easy growing up in a family of eight kids; especially with handicapped brothers. I babysat the youngest brother out in the backyard of my parents' when I was a teenager, and he was very hard to handle. Besides my family life growing up, I also believe what the Catholic Church teaches us about sex, marriage, family, and relationships. The Church also teaches us that when you get married, you have to be open to having children, and I didn't want to have them. There's also the fact that more than half the marriages in this country end up in divorce. And if you have kids from that marriage, you're going to have both custody and visitation battles. Plus you have to pay child support as well. And if you don't pay your child support, they'll haul you off to jail right there. Plus, a lot of kids today are being raised in a single-parent household as well. I also didn't want to deal with a crying and colicky baby, change poopy diapers, deal with temper tantrums, having to miss work due to childcare issues, my child is sick, he or she's having problems in school and I have to go see the teacher, and so forth. I was in the workforce for 40 years. And I was never disciplined or even fired from a job due to childcare issues. I was able to get into work on time, and put in a full day's work. Since I also love to travel, I was able to plan my vacations around my work schedule instead of a school's calendar. I like to come when I out, go when I want, and just simply come home to a nice and quiet household with no nagging husband and a bunch of whiny and crying kids! These are the reasons why I chose not to have kids. And I don't regret it one bit.
Could you tell me why you are getting married as that is the "traditional" first step to having a family and you don't want a traditional family, Why do you think you have to go through the stress of getting married? Just say a vow to each other and live together. No need to get the government involved by getting a marriage contract.
People are so presumptuous when assuming you will regret not having kids. Amazing how people are so comfortable assuming about women's lives (wants and needs) and how awful that they feel they can tell us what to do. LIKE WHY DO THEY CARE?!?!?!
Me and my wife decided not to have children either and it was a good decision. Children are expensive and also take up a lot of time. All my friends had kids and they stuck at home with them or bring them along which can be a headache when they act up lol. Me and my wife have a lot of freedom to do what we want, when we want without having to find babysitters.
I’m on the fence, but recently had the illogical (for me) desire to have children since an ex friend of mine had one. I’m having to sort out societal pressure versus actual desire
Wow, you look max 20 years old. But then I am also told I look younger than my age (I am 28). I guess childfree women often look younger because of less stress and more sleep 😊
I am only about to turn 20 and like literally I don’t know if I want kids. I’m really selfish and just want all of the love from my spouse and just want to live my best life. Babies are super cute but like for 5 minutes. I need to be able to hand that baby back or I’ll fall into depression like what
Earth is so over-populated that they're trying to figure out how to colonize other planets (so far, they've ruled out Mars (too hot), Jupiter (too gassy), and Saturn (too cold). No thanks! 🌍☺️
I understand a lot of your complaints when it comes to being female and cf. While the negative comments have died down a little as I have gotten just a little bit older, the stigma is still annoying. I have reached a temporary calm with my mom on the subject because I typically don't talk about it with her (she's not crazy about my decision) and she only halfway validates my choice. (Statements where she will make a comment about people wanting kids and then saying, "I know you don't want them, but you know most people do."😅) Were you in a hurry or did you just drink some caffeine before making this video? It feels like you were talking just a bit fast.
Bunny are you the only child? Does your parents already have grandchildren? There’s usually less pressure from parents wanting grandkids from you if they already have grandkids.
Why do you wanna get married? Do you feel like there is some kind of security in involving the state in your love life and having to sign a contract? Or is it just one of those things where everyone does it so you automatically think that it's the only option?
Thanks for your question! I actually had to look this term up because I haven't heard about it. I don't consider myself to be an Antinatalist . Are you?
I love my unborn ones. This world is not a good place for them. They are better where they are 😂😂😂😂
accurate! Thanks for sharing and stopping by!
Right on!
The most responsible parent is the one who never had kids
Indeed! A guy I used to know was very fond of saying: "Things used to be so good for me... and then I was born."
My sentiments exactly I say this every other week
I think it's so important to not have a child if you don't want one. That feeling of not wanting kids is there for a reason. Enjoyed your video. 😀
But I mean if breediots do not breed like wild unconscious animals, who would the mountain lions and other predator animals kill? What about demons, who will the demons possess, harass ?
Who will inhale, eat and drink the poisoned air/food/water if breediots stop breeding ?
Who will the 'organized' exploit, use, abuse, molest, torture, work to death and murder if breediots start becoming non-deplorable, moral, ethical, logical, rational, non-narcissistic, non-selfish, non-sadist, non-child-haters, non-terrorist-oppressing tyrant DICKtators by refusing to breed like animals, aka having responsible sex? WHO ?? just WHO???
Who is going to drink all the poisonous coffee made with poisoned water, who sill use all the legal and illegal drugs and who will ingest/inject all the pharmaceuticals if breediots don't provide new consumers/victims and perpetrators ? Breediots are KEY to EVERY industrial CONplex. Without breediots ALL industrial CONplexes would go broke within a year.
How will the priesthood, through the cemetery industrial complex keep making trillions each year if breediots stop providing them fresh dead meat via breeding ?
The creation AND perpetuation of death, suffering, exploitation and slavery MUST be continued via breeding like unconscious animals by breediots, it is their duty and their coping mechanism to being bored to death, lonely, purposeless, sadists, terrorists, tyrants, megalomaniacs, power tripping control freaks, virtue signallers, cognitive dissonance, low IQ.
As well as not wanting any kids. Some people might all so look badly at it if someone just wanted 1 child
Listen to that little voice!
Female. 38. My boyfriend and I (we have been together for 15 years, and we're still going strong) are happily childfree and debt-free.
I've never imagined myself as a mom, not even when I was a child.
What’s you birth control method?
@@Myria83 I decided I never wanted kids at 10......
How's your mom doing?
My dream 😍
Honestly... I’m too selfish. Once you have kids it’s a different lifestyle. I like kids from a far but I also don’t have patience.I also don’t like how other women make my lifestyle of not having children “less” important either.
Yes exactly , no one should be putting themselves on a pedestal based on what decision they’re making .
It isn't selfish to not bring yet more humans into the world.
U aren't selfish...❤️
It’s not being selfish. That’s being responsible. But what is selfish is bringing more humans into this world.
Also the idea that you'll never be a real woman / adult because you don't want children ??
I’m 42 and child free by choice.....best decision for🙂
Male. Childfree since 14 (I never liked kids even when I was one). Nearing 25 and still haven't changed my mind. I'd rather be engaging in leisure, traveling, and working on a satisfying career. I only need my friends to keep me company.
I was more or less your age when I decided. I was told repeatedly "you'll change your mind." I didn't - not in my 20s or 30s, and now in my 40s, still not.
Saw many who have children that was somewhat miserable. All said the same thing..they didn't regret having them but wished the had waited (even tho' it sounds like regret to me) Yes, they're struggling. Me? like the saying goes ''i can do bad by my damn-self''
It's more acceptable for men not to want children, but I know men do get some pressure from society and family as well as they get older. However, hop into the body of a woman and magnify that pressure by 10000.
@@Childfree334 I know it is but it doesn't take away from my experiences with my family nor society.
I wish I could meet more men that don’t want kids.... that’s why I’m single now, because every male I meet wants kids...
I don't understand the selfish part. Like if I don't want to have children how does it make me selfish? Is it selfish to be happy? To live for yourself?
It is not selfish at all. Selfish isn't wanting to live how you want to its wanting others to live how they want you to.
Selfish is having children to live through or expect them to take care of you when you're old. I've worked in nursing homes and the majority of the residents have children and never see or hear from them.
I think it's important to recognize that in order for an action to be selfish, someone has to be suffering as a result of said action. Not having children doesn't negatively impact anyone around you so it can't be considered selfish. :) Thank you for admitting you don't like children! haha
Exactly!
Yes I couldn’t have said it better myself , thank you for leaving this comment !
@zum zum it's a ponzi scheme. Gotta be broke sometime.
What if your husband wants a baby or parents want to become a grandparent?
@@gbrieannful Personal life choices should never be made for other people. Not having a child will not impact them in any negative way. I would understand for the partner, this is why it should be talked about in the very beggining of the relationship. But I'm definitely not gonna go through parenthood because my parents want to be grandparents. It's gonna be affecting MY life and the child's life. I'm not gonna have a baby so my parents can have a cute little doll to play with twice a month.
And my parents wishing to be grandparents will never make up for all the reasons why I don't want children.
I'm 44 and debt-free with a Master's degree and in a director level job. Being child free by choice made all the difference to my education and career, and my husband and I almost never fight. It's amazing what you can do when you put yourself first. I'm sorry your mom can't see that and support you for who you are. Maybe she will come around one day.
Also CF by choice! Never had the desire. Also not a kid person. It's not a lifestyle I lust after or am interested in
The child-free life is GREAT-I am 36 & will NEVER have them! A few people tried to tell me to have them & if you want to shut them up, all you have to say is "Since you feel the need to tell me how to live my life I'll make you a deal, I will have a kid/multiple kids & then you can raise them for me" haha
@Sarah Dyer-Harrell That's even better, the look on their face would be priceless! Hahaha
I have always felt that I don´t want kids. I´ve never imagined what kind of mom I would be. I had the best mom ever, so it has nothing to with bad childhood like some people think. I just really need my freedom, I want to do what I want when I want, and I don´t really like children or enjoy spending time around them. I would lose my mind if a baby woke me up at night and would need me all the time. I´m just so happy that I realised this before having any kids. I´m free my whole life :)
I agree. How the world alone is now. It is very hard for children no less to have them. Why I choose not to.
Yes things are a little scary . I feel like everyone should feel comfortable making whatever decision suits their lifestyle . Thanks for sharing your thoughts !
Omg yes so true. I'm in my twenties and still don't want kids at all. I always hear that I will change my opinion on that but it just become stronger. I just don't see myself giving birth and become a mom and take all the reponsibility. Also I don't want to pass on my genes and diseases. I barely function on my own like how could I take enough care of a whole other human or even give birth in the first place and get through the pregnancy itself. But people just don't get it and I feel like the society expects women to become mothers :/
I agree with u 100%! I think kids are such a big responsibility if u want to rise them right. I have one friend who only wants kids to take care of her..thats not even guaranteed bc many dont even help their parents. Like u said we could change our mind but for now nope.
Yeah exactly . Some children will move away from their parents in adulthood so you never really know what’s going to happen. It’s tricky. Thanks for sharing your thoughts !
bbygrlpt2 - correct, no guarantee- "Hello In There" - John Prine
now THAT sounds selfish wtf lol
I'll be 30 in a couple of months, I'm married (straight), have a dog, and no interest in having kids. I've questioned the norm since I was a teenager, but was always dismissed, as you mentioned. Myself and my husband have a bit more of a complicated situation besides just being childfree, but suffice it to say it is such a relief not to have to plan our lives around having children. TBH I've also realized in the past while that I don't really like kids that much... even the well-behaved ones. I just don't have the patience for all of the questions and chaos. Rest assured there are other women like you out there with a similar stance! Thanks for making this video!
Also, this has to be one of the greatest and rawest videos. 🙌🏼🙌🏼
thanks for stopping by ! 😊
It’s really simple - I tell people “childfree = more for me”
Same! I rather maybe regret not having kids than having them any regretting them. Also, the complications even in "normal" pregnancies and births is so f'ing high! I like kids, but i'd rather be a cool aunt or godmother and spoil them for a few hours before giving them back.
I'm 28 and CF by choice. I just don't want kids, I'm way too comfortable and would never trade this life for a life of responsibility, exhaustion and sacrifice. And if you think about it, I don't need to. The world is full of 7.8 billion people and most of them will procreate, there is no need for ME to contribute. In fact, more people should think like us as to not f*ck this planet up irreversibly...
If they want kids and there partner doesn't want kids. And they stay with there partner and don't have them. Maybe they don't really want kids very much. If its something they can just let go of
Finally someone is fucking honest about being more on the colder side and admitting that elderly care is lowkey burdensome
It really is. I love them, but it is a crushing load sometimes.
Having kids seems like the emptiest experience one can have in life. It just sucks the meaning out of it.
I'm 28. I only want kids if I can afford them, and if I have a husband that I really trust. I had a bad phase in childhood because of my Dad's mental illness, and that affects my outlook too. I don't plan on being perfect, but I would want my kids to have some stability.
Would you stay with them. If you was with a partner who couldn't have kids or didn't want kids?
Sending you a warm pat on the back for standing your ground and taking care of yourself 💖. I don't receive much pressure because I have made it clear to everyone around me that I would just cut them off if they kept on pestering me. However, where I am from, it is expected to have children. Highly expected. When you get married, people say to you "have 7 boys and 7 girls" as the traditional way to congratulate you. The pressure is heavy on women and I can totally get that it takes a lot of courage, in general, to go against the norm. So, well done you 💖!
I have zero kids and I’m happy with that and I plan to keep it that way.
I think the person they want to be with is more important. Like if they want kids and they was with a partner who couldn't have kids. Or didn't want kids some people would still stay with the partner and just let it go and not have them
33 and childfree! My fiancé just turned 30 and we’ve been together over 7 years. We love being able to do what we want, when we want.
That’s the life I want. I want to go on vacation and work a nice job with plenty of hours without having to find someone to watch my kids. Being responsible for another person alone scares the crap out of me. I’m glad my mom agrees with my choice to not have kids and I already warned her no grandkids. Who even said she wanted to be a grandma? Lol. Even if she did want me to have kids and I didn’t want kids, I’d go through with my choice to not have them regardless of what she wants bc they would be my kids and my responsibility at the end of the day and not hers.
Kids and babies scare me. I don’t want to be responsible for another human being. It is important to know what you REALLY want and what you really DON’T want. People need to understand there’s more than just the newborn stage and that you’re legally responsible for it until about 18 years old. So no I won’t be having kids which isn’t anyone else’s issue. I want to do things that I want to do. Being responsible for someone else is a main factor. There’s nothing wrong with not wanting the responsibility of kids.
And pets are easier to take care of than kids. I’ve held my niece when she was a newborn before and it is a SCARY feeling bc she was so fragile and that made me realize that I shouldn’t have kids. Babies are very fragile.
I’m 43 & child feee. I fractured my pelvic when I was 20. I have all kinds of titanium holding me in place. It’s not in the cards for me, as of now. I am 43. I also suffered a brain injury that severely damaged my level of patience, my hat is off to mothers! You rock!
I think the person they want to be with is more important. Like if they want kids and they was with a partner who couldn't have kids or didn't want kids. Some people would still reather be with the partner. And just let it go and not have kids
@@bennewman4675 well said. G’nite
@@Jettnround Thanks good night
Same here. 21, married- childfree. My mom also has some very strong positions... but you got this, thank you for listening to yourself!
I feel same way been with fiancee for 10 half years I do not want kids my niece and nephew for me I am almost 38 in June so not want children time soon I love nephew and baby niece that all can handle in my life
Yes I’m glad you have nieces and Nephews in your life , that’s great!!
You are not alone on this! I feel the same way! ❤️
tbh giving that pregnancy irreversibly changes your brain....... i think it should 1000% be the person who's gonna go through it's decision, not anyone else's
Not only that but it can permanently damage your body and even kill you. Plus research shows that fetus cells will actually lodge themselves in the woman's brain to manipulate her more.
@@HikaruYamamoto that’s creepy af
I am relating to EVERYTHING you are saying! Thank you for posting this video. Make more like it!
The mother relationship, the body image issues...I know mothers who love being parents yet they will admit that everything that fucked you up in your childhood is exacerbated when you have your own children. You relive that trauma and sometimes in trying to be exactly like the opposite of your parents, you do new damage. What a messy business: having children haha.
42, married, child-free. DINK FTW!
Thought you were a teenager lol im also childfree by choice my cabbage patch kids are enough for me.
It's your choice. I don't understand why people would have a problem with that?
I don't think people should leave there partner. Just because there partner can't have kids or doesn't want kids. I think the partner is more important
Stay strong! My mom is the same way. Always mentioning left n right "maybe one day ill have grandkids. Why dont you want to have a baby? Oh u and your husband would have such a cute little boy.." blablabla... shutup mom. Is she gonna raise them? NO. So she gets NO grandkids.
Lol is your Mom still asking about grandkids?
Love this video! Im also cfbc and it's so wonderful to hear others on TH-cam with my same mindset 🖤
The irony of all these "Who's gonna take care of you when you're old?!" is that practically ALL of them REFUSE to take care of their own parents.
Because "I can't! I have my OWN family to worry about!". And then those people really just... 404 and stare blankly.
I want kids but I won't unless I can actually afford them. Growing up I watched my single mom struggle to pay bills, buy a ton of groceries, do allll the chores by herself with no help, etc.
We managed and she was a great mom, but I can remember soooo many times feeling guilty after we bought popcorn at the theatre, or a DVD a Walmart.
One time my grandma offered to buy us new movies (DVD) and my sibling chose an expensive new one that just came out. I remember whispering to my sibling we couldn't afford that and could only grab from the discounted dollar bin. My sibling refused, not seeing what I saw.
My grandma saw us bickering and said "It's okay. It's okay."
But deep down I knew it wasn't.
I remember being 9 and wishing I was older so I could get a job and help pay for bills so we wouldn't be poor anymore.
Kids shouldn't have to feel like that, or worry about money.
You were honest open and listed real reasons that anyone would understand. Good for you and you're soon to be husband knowing what life you want.
Hi! Thanks a lot for this video. Im from argentina, and actually I am currently going through a separation with my partner of the last ten years, because i dont want to have kids. Its very sad, but ill be totally selfish to me to have a kid with the only reason for dont break the relationship. We need much people like you saying trulie facts about be parents. In my country the society dont think deeply whats mean have a child in a unstable economy. And here "born" a lot of problems, like crimes and violency. Thanks a lot for this videos. And sorry for my english. Cheers!
Thank you for making this video. Hopefully seeing the out pour of support from the childfree community let's you know that you are not alone. We're here for you.
No kids and did the biggest happy dance when I hit menopause. Woohoo hoooooo!!!!!!!!! Free at last!!!!!!
It's good that, more and more people don't want children by their choice. It's a win win situation for everyone. People who don't want children are happy. The government are happy as population is being controlled. People who want children, gets more resources for their children, as there are no other children and they are happy too. Everyone is happy. Actually we have to motivate more and more people to not have children.
I've always wanted children, and it's hard knowing I can't, but I know I would be miserable. I naturally worry and it would be too much and too overwhelming for me. As well, the state of the world is not good and I'm not sure it will get better. Climate change with overpopulation is ruining the planet and life is stressful.
100% I thought I always wanted children, but with time I've realized it was mostly socialization and very little true inherent desire.
it's so nice to hear explanations on this point of view. wish me luck when i tell my parents i don't want kids either. yikes. im an only child so they have a ton of expectations
So what? Screw their expectations. Your life is YOURS. I told my mother I didn't want kids and she gave the same response that all breeding sheep do that I will "change my mind". 🙄 Guess what? She went to her grave with no grandkids from me.
You seem younger than "approaching your thirties"! :-)
With the whole "children taking care of their parents when they're old thing" I really hope it's not solely my responsibility (I'm an only child with 2 parents who already smoke and live an unhealthy lifestyle e.g. rarely wearing sunscreen, not being physically active, highly stressed because they are workaholics)
I really hope other family members help them when they're elderly or they have nurses. I really hope that they die suddenly like a heart attack as opposed to cancer. I've experienced a family member dying of cancer it's physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually EXHAUSTING. When my nana had cancer (she died about a year ago) I had never been so anxiety filled in my life!
I'm not excited for my parents or anyone to get old so having children for that sole purpose is not only selfish but also extremely cruel.
It's not your responsibility to care for your parents in their old age, ESPECIALLY when they are deliberately living an unhealthy lifestyle. Screw that. Show them that if the only reason that they had you was to be a caretaker to them in old age, they will be sorely disappointed.
Thank you. 56 and childfree. Love my freedom. I don't like kids and prefer animals. I am a bit annoyed as my brother has a kid now and they are restricting my freedom sometimes. So you can be an aunt and your freedom gets slowly taken away.I do help out mainly as I had narc parents and I hate abusive parents. There are a lot of CF people who don't use adequate protection and end up having a baby if they don't want it. I always got my bf to have protection and it protects me from STDs too I don't want to be killed or injured in childbirth too. I hate the indignity of childbirth. Humans damage the planet ie nature and they rape and murder people too. Humans are a pest in society. I am lucky in that my mother fully supports me in being childfree. She told me she hated a lot of things about being a parent.
Why is your freedom affected because your brother had a kid? That is his and his partner's problem. Put your big girl pants on, open your mouth and say NO. I wish my siblings would expect me to help out and babysit their kids because I am child free. F*ck that. They are lucky if I send birthday and Christmas presents. They chose their life and I chose mine.
When I was younger I definitely wanted kids, but life got in the way, the romance department didn't really go my way and now as I am approaching the late 30s I feel that ship has sailed, at least in terms of bio kids. I don't think I would want to get pregnant at this stage in my life. I might go the fostering route later on, and I wouldn't mind a step-parent role if a future partner were to already have kids. But I am pretty okay now with not having kids. It was where life took me and I kinda like my life.
Hi there, I was a fence-sitter for 10 years after getting married. I was very ambivalent about it.. But everytime my husband and would seriously talk about it and even tried few times. A feeling of dread and panick would come over me. Id take a pregnancy test and would feel total relief about not being pregnant. Im 42 and now know to always trust my instincts. I ve come to the conclusion that children were not for me, the desire was not strong enough to make such life changing decision for 3 people( myself, hubby and baby)and I have made peace with that decision. Of course, there are a bunch of more serious reasons for my decision but the comment would be too long g.
you're so cute and funny (you're being serious and thoughtful but there's a humor to it) loved this whole video and relate.
I just didn't think about having a kid. After I left my mom's house, I have so much independence. I don't have big sister standing over me to tell me to clean this or do the dishes. I can go out whenever I want. Fired from job, I don't care, I don't have children to feed. I can go to Grand Canyon next week, just hop on the plane. I avoided men... one of them be like... learn to cook for me... I'm like hell no. I am living with my mom... She's not strict... she won't divorce me because she loves me... I can do whatever I want. I'm 50 years old... Yeah my mom has me and my sister, we are all grown up.... but I wouldn't want a child like my sister, nephew and me. My child would look like me and I know the father of my child ain't gonna be handsome. 50 years later, they'll be fat, ugly and old working at a regular job...
Thanks for your video! I could totally relate! You’re the first child free related video I’ve watched in the past couple of days that also mentioned about our love/hate relationship with our body! 😩
Smart young woman.
At the end of the day, we each have to live by our decisions, good, bad, or indifferent, it's your life and yours alone, you can't, nor should you try and please everyone all throughout the day, live your own life as you see fit for you, and as long as you and your partner/fiance treat each other with dignity, love and respect, I say, who the f cares about what others think, I certainly don't. I respect ya'lls decision, I hope for only the best for ya'll. Take care.
I don't want to have kids or get married. Sometimes I feel like Im asking for too much and going to end up alone 😣. I really can't help that I feel this way though and i fear i wont be able to find anyone.
I dont want kids because....well because I dont want them at all, never have.
I always felt the same way and still do...while my son turns 5 this week lol I was very young and had to work my way through personal trauma while raising a kid in toxic family households moving to a different couch every 4 months
I agree 100% I’m 33 and never wanted kids and still stick by it. It’s hard because my partner wants kids so we will have to see how well he accepts this in the long haul.
Also, I love animals and being around them is so fulfilling and brings lots of happiness and peace into my life.
I think the partner is more important. Like if they want kids and they was with a partner who couldn't have kids or didn't want kids. Some people would reather stay with the partner and accept it
Opposite for me. I used to not want kids but my heart and mind has changed but unfortunately I’m almost 30 and was unfortunate to never meet the right one :( so I don’t think kids will happen for me, cuz I personally wouldn’t want to be a single mom. Kutos to women who are but I want a partner to raise kids. Why bring a child into the world and not give them a father ? If it happens it happens for some ppl fine but why do it purposely?
Thanks for sharing! I completely understand not wanting to be a single mom. Good luck on your journey, I wish you the very best.
Too bad so many women don't think like you. They just breed indiscriminately with any jerk that puts a bunch in their oven. Kudos to the women who look at the world around them, then deeply contemplate important decisions before acting. I applaud you ma'am. 👏🏽 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Great video hun. Thanks for sharing
As a guy still undecided. if I want to be child free or not. Its a good thing we live in a society that now wants to normalize "child free choice" and "wants to adopt kids" choice. I was always against stigma of person not wanting to have child. Although before I had questions why other chooses that. But as I grew I realize that the world is a complicated place. And its scientific that when population increase. Psychologically and physically human will automatically evolve to either not wanting to have kids or will be attracted to same sex. What other super religous people don't realize that we are programed to be 10 billion in population when we reach that peak our body would evolve to lessen its population hence why LGBT and child free people are increasing. Especially we are at peak of 10 bilion in either 2050 or 2060. So our body is just adjusting. Its normal even in some animals that have high population, same gender relationship or animals not wanting to have kids will increase. That is why even though I believe in evolution, I still believe in Higher power that implants order in us. And ironically enough religous people stigmatising the LGBT and child free by choice people are the ones creating the disorder.
I enjoyed your message. Enjoy your life with or without children.
No such thing as with out children. Because everyone who we meet is the children of someone
I relate to you soooo so much! I'm 25 married and am child free. I'm extremely introverted and sometimes struggle with my mental health and anxiety and it's hard to imagine having to care for a child when I can barely take care of myself some days. I also love animals and I grit my teeth when my inlaws encourage their baby and kids to hit my bird's cage. It makes me cringe because of the lack of respect for my pets. I guess I'm a little over protective of my animals but they're my "babies". Haha maybe that's where all my "maternal instinct" went. They of course keep asking me to have a baby but I'm firm in my "No" and no explanation end of discussion every time it comes up. 😅
No, that is not nice to encourage to hit the bird cage. I'm so sorry.
@@jaleesa00 it really makes me angry when people think it's okay to harrass my animals for their entertainment. Once my Bil and Sil took my birds to their floor and gave them to their kids to play with while me and my husband were out for the day. I was fuming mad because they never asked! I've resorted to locking the cage and keeping them in my room because they won't listen to me when I tell them to stop scaring my birds. It's infuriating! 😤
Why do we need anyone's validation though? Sure we'd like some understanding and respect, but people can be jerks. So why do we need their validation in choosing to be childfree.
Not wanting children is NOT selfish, having children IS... There are no unselfish reasons to want children, try to think of only one, you can't as it's always a mean to an end... If people stopped for a second and thought about it seriously they'd realize that having children is throwing someone into a perpetual game of russian roulette without even asking them...
Seriously! The creation of life was the single greatest sin ever committed, and I for one, could never willingly commit such an atrocity against another.
Crin purswait
SAME.
Unfortunately I also don't find a partner that is childfree and I don't want to be with someone until they really want to have children.
It's a lonely path, but I'm okay with it
I think the partner is more important. What about if you was with a partner who couldn't have kids?
@@bennewman4675 If the partner okay or can't have kids I'm okay with that
@@silverliningfragrance1434 Or you OK with staying with someone who doesn't want kids?
@@bennewman4675 I don't want children also so I'm looking for someone that also doesn't want to have kids
I had a big family growing up. It was such a distress living with 5 other siblings. I love my little family members but I also like sending them back home. I'm never having kids. I get loving them like no other thing in the world, but it's just not in my heart for something that doesn't exist. 1 kid= 1 exist.
Can we see your Guinea Pigs?
Family and/or friends really need to realise to not put pressure on mainly women to have kids, just respect the childfree choice and carry on with enjoying the company of that person
Round guinea pig drain
Child free by choice here.
When you start to live with a baby you understand that is not for you, my nephew is too young, he can't speak and he cries and screams a lot, I don't regret my decision, I'm 33, childfree, I want a tubal ligation, I don't have a boyfriend but I'm scared of being pregnant in the future if I have a boyfriend in the future, I take a lot of medicine and I don't want a surprise because my contraceptive pills don't work, that's my worst nightmare.
I feel you. I want to get married and have a life partner, but an unplanned pregnancy scares the hell out of me. I got a phobia.
I'm 27 and I considered being child free for a few years. I had a lot of negative attitudes about parenting. But my partner had kids already and we had so much fun together as a family I decided I wanted to expand our family. So now I have 1 bio kid and I'm thinking having 2 is a good number for me. Including my step kids will be 4 kids, it might sound crazy & there's definitely sacrifice but it's a fun and meaningful life!
I wouldn't even date someone with kids. I've seen the parenting life and I really don't want that for myself lol.
@@HikaruYamamoto After all the sacrifices I've made, not dating parents is the right choice!!
@Sarah Dyer-Harrell Thing is, if you date someone with kids you'll never be your SO's number one in their life. You will always be taking a backseat. You also cannot live anywhere you want to, you have to stay around the the mom/dad of the child. You will also have to deal with a possible crazy ex trying to wreck your relationship because they are jealous. They have a potential weapon chaining down the person you love. It really is not worth it.
If their children are adults, you could still get stuck with the grandkids.
It's a fun and meaningful like for YOU. Doesn't mean it will be for anybody else that has strong feelings about going childless.
@@HikaruYamamoto Well said. That's exactly why I won't date anyone with kids either. If you are a parent, then I am automatically not interested.
Thanks for the vid ! You do you! x
Cool and smart woman.
I support you girl !
August 1 Happy International CHILDFREE Day
I am 65. Although I have never been married and I don't have any kids, I strongly disagree when I hear people say that they don't want to have kids because this is a terrible place to raise kids, the environment, overpopulation, and so forth.
This world has been a terrible place for centuries. And yet, people still have kids. My grandparents were raised during World War I. My parents were raised during the Great Depression and World War II. I was raised during the Vietnam War. The drug culture. The assassinations of both the Kennedy brothers, Martin Luther King, Malcom X, and Medgar Evers. The riots in the cities and on college campuses. Protests against the Vietnam War. Draft card burnings. The murders of those eight student nurses in Chicago by Richard Speck. The Bay of Pigs Invasion. The Cuban Missile Crisis. The University of Texas tower shootings by Charles Whitman. The Manson Family murders. The Kent State Shootings. And so forth.
I didn't think take into consideration the tragic events of both the 60's and the 70's as the reasons why I didn't want to have kids. I took into consideration that I don't have patience with children. I was raised in a conservative Catholic Church family of 8 kids. Six brothers, one sister, and myself. Four of my brothers are mentally handicapped. But unfortunately, one of them passed away back in July of 2000. It wasn't easy growing up in a family of eight kids; especially with handicapped brothers. I babysat the youngest brother out in the backyard of my parents' when I was a teenager, and he was very hard to handle.
Besides my family life growing up, I also believe what the Catholic Church teaches us about sex, marriage, family, and relationships. The Church also teaches us that when you get married, you have to be open to having children, and I didn't want to have them.
There's also the fact that more than half the marriages in this country end up in divorce. And if you have kids from that marriage, you're going to have both custody and visitation battles. Plus you have to pay child support as well. And if you don't pay your child support, they'll haul you off to jail right there. Plus, a lot of kids today are being raised in a single-parent household as well.
I also didn't want to deal with a crying and colicky baby, change poopy diapers, deal with temper tantrums, having to miss work due to childcare issues, my child is sick, he or she's having problems in school and I have to go see the teacher, and so forth. I was in the workforce for 40 years. And I was never disciplined or even fired from a job due to childcare issues. I was able to get into work on time, and put in a full day's work.
Since I also love to travel, I was able to plan my vacations around my work schedule instead of a school's calendar. I like to come when I out, go when I want, and just simply come home to a nice and quiet household with no nagging husband and a bunch of whiny and crying kids!
These are the reasons why I chose not to have kids. And I don't regret it one bit.
Could you tell me why you are getting married as that is the "traditional" first step to having a family and you don't want a traditional family, Why do you think you have to go through the stress of getting married? Just say a vow to each other and live together. No need to get the government involved by getting a marriage contract.
Marriage can come with some nice benefits. Income tax benefits are definitely a plus.
we are out here
People are so presumptuous when assuming you will regret not having kids. Amazing how people are so comfortable assuming about women's lives (wants and needs) and how awful that they feel they can tell us what to do. LIKE WHY DO THEY CARE?!?!?!
People: Who's going to take care of you when you get old?
Me: Money😂
You look super young. I would’ve thought you were like 18-20 years old.
Me and my wife decided not to have children either and it was a good decision. Children are expensive and also take up a lot of time. All my friends had kids and they stuck at home with them or bring them along which can be a headache when they act up lol. Me and my wife have a lot of freedom to do what we want, when we want without having to find babysitters.
I’m on the fence, but recently had the illogical (for me) desire to have children since an ex friend of mine had one. I’m having to sort out societal pressure versus actual desire
Slept in until noon and almost missed work. I just don’t know how I’d actually be a parent if I can’t wake up for my alarms
Wow, you look max 20 years old. But then I am also told I look younger than my age (I am 28). I guess childfree women often look younger because of less stress and more sleep 😊
I am only about to turn 20 and like literally I don’t know if I want kids. I’m really selfish and just want all of the love from my spouse and just want to live my best life. Babies are super cute but like for 5 minutes. I need to be able to hand that baby back or I’ll fall into depression like what
I completely agree with all of your points and I never want children either! What are your thoughts on birth control/sterilization?
Earth is so over-populated that they're trying to figure out how to colonize other planets (so far, they've ruled out Mars (too hot), Jupiter (too gassy), and Saturn (too cold). No thanks! 🌍☺️
Isn't mars cold?
I understand a lot of your complaints when it comes to being female and cf. While the negative comments have died down a little as I have gotten just a little bit older, the stigma is still annoying. I have reached a temporary calm with my mom on the subject because I typically don't talk about it with her (she's not crazy about my decision) and she only halfway validates my choice. (Statements where she will make a comment about people wanting kids and then saying, "I know you don't want them, but you know most people do."😅) Were you in a hurry or did you just drink some caffeine before making this video? It feels like you were talking just a bit fast.
Bunny are you the only child? Does your parents already have grandchildren? There’s usually less pressure from parents wanting grandkids from you if they already have grandkids.
@@celesteperezmora8159 I know I’m just asking as to why her mother is so upset but yeah at the end of the day it’s her choice.
You’ve thought this out 🧠
My vasectomy was the best investment I've ever made. Its all about the math. Do the math or the math will do you.
1:31 1:33
Lol you look younger
Why do you wanna get married? Do you feel like there is some kind of security in involving the state in your love life and having to sign a contract? Or is it just one of those things where everyone does it so you automatically think that it's the only option?
Why do breeders get married? How can it possibly be a necessity?!
Well there is some security in that actually, and some people do want that.
just be careful...don't drink and drive. lol...I've been sober for 12 years now lmaoo
Barefoot and pregnant isn’t really a good look
This world is filled with humans being born into sin. Better to be nurturing to all who exist.
Do you consider yourself an Antinatalist, too?
Thanks for your question! I actually had to look this term up because I haven't heard about it. I don't consider myself to be an Antinatalist . Are you?