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I'm a near 38 year old who never had a relationship, not for lack of trying, but I consider myself a really happy person. Love my life. Hearing that having friends and family that support you mitigates feeling of loneliness made a lot of sense to me, that is very interesting to know. It also helps that I greatly enjoy my own company. But I struggled pretty hard in my 20s. Which makes me think that there might be some physical, hormonal component that hits people really hard from early teens to mid 20s. It's like your mind punishes you for being alone. And then later in life it just... stops... kind of. But that's probably a lot to do with me just maturing a bit every year.
Your videos feel like the same thing. “It’s okay to be alone and single.”. And it is getting kinda old. Maybe that’s just me but I sure as hell hope I’m not the only one who is noticing this annoying pattern. I might unsubscribe.
I am 52 years old and I have always been single, because I have never found a single woman who wanted me. I am single because of the choice of women. And this sucks, because I would like to at least try the experience of a couple to mature. Being single for me must be a choice, but only after having tried all the options including casual sex
Thank you for breaking the societal rules of the "life has only purpose when in a relationship". It's so hardwired in us. There is nothing wrong with being alone.
After all the painful years recently I've actually learned to be happy by myself for once without needing much social interaction I try to forget the tragic past and don't worry about the grim future too much i just live in the present moment and enjoy every moment of this precious life as much as I can everyday this is the way to live trust me LIVING IN THE MOMENT and SELF LOVE is key you don't need anybody else to tell you how to really live your own life we all came into this world ALONE and we'll leave it ALONE
It’s not true for everyone though. For some people there is a lot wrong with being alone. You don’t even have to be extroverted either, for some of us it is important to have a significant other to confide in or to “complete us” (only on my first coffee so couldn’t think of anything less corny)
I'm 26 and I've been single all my life. While I do like the idea of being in a relationship, I've also realised that I like being alone and I hate compromises. And when I see the problems couples face, I feel relieved. But who knows what future has in store for me?
I’m 21 and also resonate with this situation. Although I do sometimes think being in a relationship is enticing… my me time is more enticing. And I haven’t met anyone who could change my mind. Who knows 🤷🏻♀️
@@kikizuli7813you're both young and I can confirm after being all my life in a relationship that you're not missing out NOW. Teenage romance (as in, those feeling when you're a teenager) however is something that everyone should experience After that the dating landscape becomes full of compromise that are usually not met because nobody wants to compromise
I also have a friend who swore that they'll be single for the rest of their life who's now on track to getting married. You never know how life can surprise you! :)
As 33-year-old I can totally relate. Although I have longed for love, relationship, closeness and so on I think that I'm on a good way to just accept life the way it is now for me. And I think that's a good, if not the only good way to deal with it, as trying to force a romantic relationship in a almost desperate way has not so great chances for success. I guess the first step is to fully accept ("love") yourself, before loving and especially also being loved in a relationship by someone else.
I'm 43. I have had so many co-workers come up to me and say, "You are so lucky you are single." The number one reason for unhappy marriage that I have noticed is not being able to detect the spouse has a major mental illness and is unwilling to go to therapy. The most common one is narcissist. To detect this watch out for people who can not take criticism. The second is postpartum depression in women. Which really seems like more of a ptsd to be honest. The wife became more controlling along with other issues.
As a woman who consistently dated from 13-24, I definitely want to say that I have been the happiest as a single woman for the last few years. I occasionally dip my toe into the dating pool but find that they just don't fit my life. Lots of people need to really heal and go to therapy before they should try dating as an adult. Good luck to everyone, on whatever path you choose.
Therapy doesn't help and if someone's never been in a relationship past 25 it feels like they're broken and it'll never happen, especially when it's waved in front of you like a carrot and then yanked away because you're too slow. And there's no other way to satisfy sexual desire besides masturbating and eventually that gets depressing.
As someone who wants a real genuine relationship, I know that your happiness doesn't come from anyone else but you. You shouldn't look outward for love because outward is the direction it goes. Love yourself I love will come in the direction of the the heart you love witch is yours. 🩷🩵🪽
Yes. I hate that. Like I genuinely enjoy being alone and not being around people all the time. It's refreshing and I get to be me and to relax. I'm more than just being someone's gf or wife. I don't want to get married or have kids. I love being with me.❤️
This really resonates with me. I used to be single and really, really lonely and craved a relationship to feel fulfilled. But I've been single for 11 years and through the wonderful support and social stimulation of family, friends, and the platonic cuddling community, I've reached a point where I'm having a really good time being single and not compromising myself for someone else. I no longer feel like another person is what I NEED to feel whole and complete. I'm complete on my own.
I have been single my whole entire life. I have never dated before, and I am staying that way. I realized that I was only focused on dating and sex because other people do it and I wanted to fit in. I am happily single and celibate. 🤗😇😇😇
Whenever those feelings of loneliness come creeping in, I always remind myself: Even if this sucks, what would suck more is having to deal with someone else’s problems. Just thinking about the possibility of having to change myself for someone else is enough to turn me away from dating in its entirety.
As an introvert Aromantic and Asexual I have noticed people think Introverts live a sad life because they don't like connecting with people but what people dont understand is that introverts love being alone. People will always tell me to get out more but I honestly don't want to and they get mad. But I love my peaceful life. I only have platonic love not romantic love. It's not that wanting to be single means you have no love we do have love but not the romantic and sexual love. It's tiring getting pressured to be In a romantic relationship.
I'm now 68. I've had three major live-in relationships, each of which lasted years. My last partner is now my very best friend. But most of my life has been lived as a single. And frankly, it took me quite a while to realize how much I loved being single. For one thing, the freedom is amazing. Also, I think lifestyle compromise is much easier when you are younger. If I was to meet a good potential partner now, I would definitely be willing to explore a relationship, but I would need my space (and by that I mean my own domicile and lots of built in solitude). Also, I love single travel and have done a lot of trips on my own. So join me in pausing to think of all that is wonderful in being single! I am content and happy. 🍀
I am glad I’m not alone in this feeling of contentment I get from being alone. At almost 43, I have been alone more I think that I have been in a relationship. I’ve had a couple of live in girlfriends, but one was a narcissist (I’m pretty sure) and the other one was younger than me and the generation gap was just kind of weird after a while.
I'm only slightly younger than you and most of the time, I'm ok being alone. You mentioned holidays but I can't find a holiday package for single people. It always ends up double the price. Do you know of any companies in Europe that cater for solo travellers ?
I’m 46 and single for the first time since I was 14. I’m still very uncomfortable going in public alone, like to a restaurant, let alone travel alone. I love to travel and am seeking a travel companion. I never considered going alone. Maybe I’ll give it a try.
My reason for being single: Why the hell would I want someone around who's just going to cause unnecessary bullshit and stress, making my life more difficult than it has to be?
Learning to be alone and actually enjoy your own company is a gift. Knowing that relationships are only supposed to ADD to your life… not be your life.
Single forever! I thought I was crazy for not wanting to be in a relationship. I grew up with an overly-toxic brother and every time I got into a relationship, I'd just see a side of the guy that reminds me of my brother and I'd just end things. So I decided never again. Here's to us, the singletons!🍻
im just a hopeless romantic with high standards and searching with no rush for an ideal partner,if i wont find them then im convinced of being the rich independent and strong aunt WEWHEHEHEEE (i cant even clean my room)
Being single from my experience gives you more of a feeling of independence in my opinion. Should you avoid relationships? I wouldn't say so, because having a great time with a girlfriend is nice, even though that might come with some downsides or even sacrifices. It heavily depends on the person in the end, but I personally wouldn't avoid relationships when it's probably going to be a good one.
@@anderstermansen130 That must be coming from bad experience. Understandable, if that's the case, but you can't really stop people from attempting to get into one.
it's because relationships have changed with time. Now living in a social media world, there's high expectations from either side which brings the shitty quality in people eventually
@@PrivateForPersonalReasonsA person doesn't have to come from a bad experience to come to that conclusion. They can just see the hassle and conclude it's not for them. I don't have to rob someone to know that I don't wanna be a robber. Just hearing about it is enough.
The best part is you never have to deal with felling jealous, you don't have to worry if someone really likes you or if they stopped loving you and you'll never fear being abondoned out of the blue or being cheated on. Also, you won't have to go through break ups
So much happier single! Been married, had kids, love them but can’t ever see being a couple again. And people who say “who will take care of you when you’re old” - there’s so much divorce and loss that there’s no guarantees anymore.
I spent 14 years, give or take, in an abusive relationship so staying single doesn't the hold same sting for me that it will for some. For the first time I'm able to put myself first, I can keep on top of everything and I feel content. I honestly can't see myself trying for romance again, I'm happy in my quiet little bubble 🙂
I LOVE being single. I have also proven myself I can be the best partner ever. My last relationship was pretty toxic so I decided to end it. Thankfully we both agreed to it, because he acknowledged his posessiveness. So even in tears, we knew we had to part ways. Ever since I've been single and I don't miss being in a relationship, honestly. One could argue I just don't feel like going through all the toxic stuff again, but that isn't the case. Of course I'd like a healthy relationship, If I ever fall in love again, but I'm not actively searching for it. I'm good being single. But I'm not closed to the idea of having a relationship again. If I have to be single forever, then so be it, I'm ready for it. Whatever happens, I'm ready for it.
Honestly, being aroace actually means it's a lot easier for me to just stay single forever. I'm just not the type to really be in relationships myself, and it took me a while to figure out that I don't need to do something I don't want to do just to be happy. Besides, I always have my family and my dog if I want unconditional love and support 👍
I think this is it for me, too. I'm asexual as well, and have never been in a relationship. I went on a couple of dates with a guy while I was in college 15 years ago, but nothing since. And I'm mostly okay with that. I don't really want to be in a relationship. The peace of being alone is too precious.
I've recently just left a "situationship" of about 10 years. I've never felt so alive as I do now that she's no longer in the picture. I no longer hate myself, and have become my own best friend. I may never love again, that's no issue though, as I love myself for who I am :)
Happy for you, 10 years to only be a situationship is far too long. Love will find you unexpectedly if at all, life will be prosperous now nonethless!!
This was sweetly validating. Being single isn't about anti-love or anti-marriage. It's just about enjoying your own company to a degree that you wouldn't sacrifice it for anything that isn't worth it.
Being single gives us the full freedom to get right with GOD, to build into existence once lost relationship, between GOD and creation, between PARENT and child. 1 Corinthians Chapter 7 KJV 32 But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: 33 But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife. 34 There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. 35 And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction. this world presents love as lust, and if you`re not always touched, then you are not loved = lies and fear propaganda. All of it because the MK ULTRA PROJECTS from masons. John 15:13 KJV Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
Perfect timing for this video! I've never been in a relationship and of course, when I was younger, I really wanted one and I tried and tried. Years of trying different looks, different approaches, taking advice from friends and brothers, but no one ever showed any interest in me or paid attention when I tried to show affection, and of course, the good old friend zoning! I thought there was something wrong with me for a while, but I've come to realize how happy I am alone and how I can't honestly picture myself in a relationship 😅 and that's okay! I'm quite content being alone with my cat and guinea pigs 😊
Thank you for sharing with us. To be fair, relationships are hard! Though I hope that you'd maybe find someone worth dating one day, it's also great to hear that you're happy being single! :) On a serious note, how are guinea pigs as pets?
@Psych2go They are great pets! But they are not for kids, or starter pets. They require daily cleaning, teeth checks, nail clipping, anal sack cleaning. Time consuming. I love ❤️ em!
I’m not happy with being single, but I can definitely appreciate all of the self growth and self reflection I’ve experienced the last few years. Being in a romantic relationship is stressful, no matter how good it is!! Take the time now to develop good habits and self care 😊
I’m happiest without a partner and yet I adore being near my family for support - I don’t want someone else in my space , having to compromise for their needs, and not living the life I want to live. I love my friends and yet they never hold me back from following my goals (and vice versa).. my mental health is too precious to gamble on relationships
I thought I am not normal lol! Everyone is in a relationship or getting married but I don’t feel the need to or want to be in a relationship. I don’t know if I am ever going to change my mind tomorrow but I feel good right now, I am at peace with myself..
Same here, I feel amazing in my own bubble and enjoying the single life but my family just wants to be a pain. I don't suggest giving in to their nagging tho cause that usual leads to a abusive relationship and thats a big no no. Also your friends kinda suck😅
This is honestly what I was thinking last winter. I was single all winter and seasonal depression wasn't that bad because I could focus on myself. I got into a relationship just before summer and all my attention went towards them. I'm single again and I'm making it stay that way for my mental health.
You forgot to mention something pretty important to me: Being single means you get to meet a lot more people, first of all in a simple social manner, as you're more likely to spend time outside the house, in search for connection. Expanding your circle of friends and having a lot of people to talk to and places to visit, is more helpful in having a balanced and healthy state of mind, than spending a lot of time with one person, which is usually the case in monogamous relationships. Secondly, being single does not mean you don't experience romantic love. It simply means you cultivate a habit of meeting new people and if you hit it off with someone, you can have that too and choose still , not to form a "now we are joining paths in life" type of relationship with them. This can happen, because too often, we find ourselves amongst cool people but not people that we are compatible enough to be life partners with. It is actually healing to meet girl- friends (and i guess boy-friends too) who you see now and again and can also experience intimacy and sex with, without it being a state of being 'in love'. But you can love them as people and feel attracted to them. Being open from the get-go as to what each of you needs, leads to better communication and a healthier friendship, than say a relationship formed with someone you don't really want and most importantly, do not respect and/or trust to be your partner. When you are ready, and if a person appears that really makes you feel you want to try being with in the full sense of the word, go for it. And have the courage to admit to yourself, along the way, whether they are good to you or not, based on their behavior, not just their intentions. Have fun:)
well, to me, having sex with someone would only be done when i truly LOVE the person. i dont like it when people normalize casually "going to the next level" (having sex) with someone, who is a mere acquaintance or a friend. that seems like very shallow behavior, but thats just my opinion.
@@armin1500 So I will try to point out a few things and you can work out the rest: There is no true love without knowing who someone really is, to you and to the people around them. Discerning character takes time. How is it possible to know who someone truly is to you before having a relationship with them? Ergo: The true love you speak of is the I HAVE A CRUSH type of situation. Which is incredible and usually ends up in you being in love and in a relationship. If that's all you want, that is fine. But that is not the only form of intimacy there is, or of romantic sex. Also most people fall in love AFTER having spent a lot of time talking with someone AND having had sex with them for at least a few times-weeks-months. PS True love is companionship.
@@SaiyanMutant it might just be because i think im demisexual, which means i only have sex with a person or feel attraction towards them AFTER the emotional connection has been built your view on relationships is kindof "pick-and-choose"-ey, but at least thats how i understood it also its as if we MUST have sex with someone before actually entering a relationship with them, ergo the relationship inevitably fail?
also! you make it sound like you need to build some kind of group of people and spend time jumping from person to person whilst still having sex with them, and then you choose the one youre "satisfied" with. thats why it seems very shallow, sex should only be shared with someone that you TRULY trust, and only if you have an actual connection with them beforehand
@@armin1500 It's not about satisfaction. But waiting for the right person, to form a relationship with. Yeah being demisexual means this approach would be difficult for you. Still, how do you define trust ?
I'm 22 and never been in a relationship, the reasons I feel lonely are because I'm changing lifestyle, my friends are changing and some getting further away and being home with family is both good and bad. It's like half relationship, it's full of people, but I don't enjoy 100% of my time. I wish for more calm and peace and fun. I liked how you highlighted the positivity of being single.
FINALLY! I was searching for this answer. I was so overwhelmed of "it's mandatory to be in a relationship" Like... I have so much things i want to do in the future. Like making a visual novel game, a cat hotel shop with my best friend, being successful... I also want to fulfill me and my brother's dreams and biggest plan together. So basically, i just find me being in a romantic relationship kinda bothering me. And what i actually needed was a best friend :'] And i can't actually trust anyone in this generation because its ruined. Also, if i was in a "romantic relationship", i have to be responsible of not making my "partner" upset. (And these days, if u do anything wrong that makes your partner upset, it will be something controversial or something). I already had enough stress, i dont want more.
I like the animations very much they are so cute. I am 17 years old,i decided to be childfree by choice because i realized the many benefits that exist when you don't have kids. I did started to question myself if relationships are worth it,cuz i am an introvert and i always want to evolve and be better for myself. And because i like being alone i think i want to be single by choice too.
I once knew a girl who despised children. (Way too young for me). I said : "I heard you got a job in daycare." She got really mad and said : "Don't even joke about that !"
It’s not like I have a choice but nice to know either way 😅 On a more serious note, you have no idea how much this helps me and how perfect the timing was! I’m single, feeling very lonely at the moment and I often have a thought of ‘what if I’ll be single *forever*’ and this video helped, thank you ☺️ it could be that there’s not a person for me and I’m not meant for relationships, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It means I have more freedom and time to myself, so I suppose that’s good ❤
Of course you are meant for a relationship ! ! Don't start looking for it and give yourself space and time join clubs or work for organisations that have your goals and have like minded people . Didn't you know they recently found life before marriage / relationship and they are pretty sure there will be life after marriage / relationship as well !😉😘
well, this is all great and im glad youre all comfortable with yourselves, but i cant help but feel discouraged since i myself would really enjoy to have a partner who ill marry and be monogamous/committed to, yet with: #1 the normalization of casual, meaningless sexual encounters and #2 the generalizations and expectations that usually come with dating and/or relationships (made by other people, at least) discourage me aswell. these reasons make me feel as if what im hoping for (monogamy, equal commitment and loyalty/trust, etc) are just some kindof unrealistic expectation. i guess im mostly looking for closure or comfort here? sorry, this got a bit longer than intended, i hope you understand!
Thank you for making this video! I'm so tired of feeling like I'm somehow failing at being human because I'm not desperately seeking out a romantic partner. I'm 37, never been on a date, and frankly if I never am I'll be just fine.
As someone who has laboured under the the delusion that marriage was just part of life, I now, after 2 horrifically bad marriages wish I would have stayed single my whole life. I have no need for sex or intimate relationships anymore. I wish people would stop encouraging young people to get married instead of enjoying life unencumbered by another person 😢
The issue is the person is an encumbrance. If that was the case, it was doomed to fail no matter what. Both parties have to be willing to sacrifice and build together. You can test this while dating, then go from there.
I tend to flip-flop on this issue. While I often yearn for romance, I also enjoy being single. Being single for as long as I have been has given me time to reflect on my own well-being, fix my insecurities, and learn to love myself. I have to learn how to love myself before I can love another.
I've been single forever, but I do want a girlfriend. I love Valentine's Day, and I admit, I do love feminine things and characters in different shows, art, writing, animation, classical music, jazz, R&B, oldies, and romantic comedies.
@@bartholomewwindow743 Stop being stupid as hell. A man being into those things doesn’t make him gay. There are no “gay hobbies or likes and dislikes.” Simply likes and dislikes of individuals, regardless of male or female. If he we gay, whatever, but just because he likes those things doesn’t make him gay.
Psych2Go thank you so much for this video! As someone who is asexual and has multiple disabilities, I’ve always felt like I’ve preferred to be single because people wouldn’t understand that I would much rather work on improving myself than seeking out a relationship with someone. This also applies to me in regards to the fact that I am also aromantic and rarely experience romantic attraction with other people. I’m also introverted so I value my time alone to recharge my energy. Most of the time people have started taking interest in me romantically or sexually, and I have to push them away because I am not ready or even interested in having a relationship with them. It becomes exasperating and a bit annoying after a while.
Hm... The "mental health" portion is the reason I feel like I should never be in a relationship. I mean, if I purposely make myself feel worse just to keep my life "interesting", it's a good idea that I never get in a relationship
I love the way this was animated! The colors and movements were all so warm and soft, it's beautiful. I don't feel like it answered the question of "what if you want to be single forever" though. I got divorced several years ago, had a casual relationship off and on for a while, and now I'm wondering if i even want to be in a "serious" relationship ever again. My therapist would probably tell me I'll know when I'm ready, but i don't want to be ready; I'm perfectly happy living my own life.
Thank you for the feedback. We'll be sure to share it with the team. As for your casual relationship, how has that been going? Do you feel like your relationship now is better than your committed relationship?
@@Psych2go my casual partner recently met someone who is a better fit for their life goals, so we're not seeing each other much lately. I'm very happy for both of them! I think our casual relationship allowed both of us to deal w trauma and heal in order to become better, healthier people. I love them as a person and I'm hopeful their new relationship brings them closer to their goals of having kids and getting married! When I have been in serious relationships I tend to "lose myself" in the other person, and then I become very depressed. So I definitely think I need to overcome those tendencies before I get into another serious relationship, if I ever do. I'm not sure I want to see anyone right now, although I'm interested in meeting people outside the expectations of sex or a structured monogamous relationship. I think I need more friends and a better support network first, and I think monogamy / the traditional "relationship escalator" model just doesn't work for me.
From the way you're talking about your relationships, it sounds to me like you're very self-aware. I think that's a great place to start--to know your own tendencies in a relationship. I also completely agree with what you said about having a strong support network as the people in our lives will help us make better judgments in our relationships. I hope that your relationships in the near future will be amazing and fruitful. Thank you for sharing your story with us :)
I'm so glad a video like these exist. I've been single most of my life and from my experience of being around so many others in relationships. I've always been asked why am I so happy and chill and well no one believes or understands that's it cause I'm single. I don't need or care to be in a relationship but as a comfort for those around me who worry still like friends and family I say well if it happens it happens. Trust me when I say take care of yourself first and find happiness then. Not only when you're in a relationship.
I have been single for more than 10 years and people are always telling me how I need to find someone. I am completely happy being by myself. I enjoy my own company and am Learning how to make myself happy. I love being by myself.
I spent the first 15 years of my life in a toxic household where favoritism ran rampant. Blatant affairs were happening left and right because of my mother's whoredom. My younger sister and I were clearly neglected emotionally and physically, so we, of course, never learned what affection was. Our stepdad was an abusive drunkard that would constantly try to put the moves on me, even when I flat out told him I have no interest in that. My mother in denial about all of it. My older brother constantly getting recognition for doing all of the wrong things. Step siblings that were way too spoiled to even try explaining. So I hope it makes sense as to why I want to have some alone time.
This video came at the exact right time. Let me tell you about my life. I’m a girl who believes in love. I also believe in Healthy, beautiful relationships and love stories. However, the last time I fell in love, my ex took advantage of me in the worst way a woman could feel. I’ve lost my innocence, my life, dreams and myself. After a failed suicide attempt and 20 days in the hospital questioning my life and the betrayal. I realized, life is more than finding love or relationships. It felt like God gave me another life another chance to live. I can love myself, my own time, do what I love, be who I want to. Since then, I’ve decided to be single. I don’t know if I’ll ever love someone again cz the trauma I faced as a young teen, I can never forget. Love isn’t worth to loose a life so live it the best while you can. I really really love everyone one who faced something similar as me. Just so y’all know, being alone is completely fine. You don’t need a relationship to be happy. Life is so much more than that.
You've been through a lot of stuff... Whatever you are facing now, i believe in you, and you should believe in yourself! You can do this! Fulfill your dreams! >:3✨✨✨
I'm in my twenties. I've never been in a relationship and I've never felt that special feeling towards anyone, really. But throughout my entire life I've always felt so pressured by everyone around me to have a relationship, and at this point I wonder - do I really need it or am I just affected by the fact that I don't have something that everyone else has? Thanks for the video. Lack of romantic interests seems to be my biggest concern atm 🥴
That sounds a whole awful lot like Aromanticism. I would know because I am Aromantic. In layman's terms, you might just not feel romantic attraction to others, or only feel it under rare circumstances, both of which are perfectly fine. I'd say look into Aromanticism, you might learn a bit about yourself from there.
I'll be thirty next month, never been in a relationship. The thought of being in one irks me to no end. Fortunately I've never been pressured by people to find a boyfriend (aside from this one neighbour who recently told me, twice, that I need to get one because I must be lonely. If he brings it up again, I'll have to tell this full-grown man to butt-out of my private life. He doesn't even know my name, for Pete's sake). They say the only certain things in life are death and taxes. I don't see "find a significant other" anywhere in that expression, do you?
If the previous two years taught people anything, it's to never follow what everyone else is doing just because people say you should. Being single is excellent. I feel sorry for people trapped in loveless, pointless relationships trying to convince themselves that they're "investing" in something. Life is too short to be unhappy. Free yourself.
Thank you so much for making this video. So many people just keep pushing the narrative that being in a relationship is inherently better. I've personally seen so many people stay in toxic relationships, or just be with people they don't necessarily have feelings for just for the sake of being in a relationship.
Funny. Just an hour before this was posted I was thinking of asking you to cover this topic. I’m single, and have been so for just over ten years. I have had flings there in between but I never felt like romantic relationships are my thing. Although, even if I enjoy being single, there is these odd days from time to time, like today actually, that I just wish that someone would be in my space and fill me with love from an outside perspective: it’s hard to always be the one picking yourself off the ground, since it can get tiresome - especially to always fight moments of self-doubt on your own. Anyways, thank you!
You weren't abused by men in general you were abused by certain specific men. If you don't take the time to separate the difference in your mind you will end even even more lonely and bitter.
Hypothetically speaking, what if someone isn’t looking for romantic love but is looking for platonic/sisterly love from a group of women but it’s too hard to find that… unless you’re in a sorority of course. I’ll be 30 next year and I don’t know if I’ll ever find that. I live without a relationship but not without friends.
This is more what I'm looking for, as well. Not a romantic relationship but a small group of platonic, beloved friends to be a part of. Really quite a hard thing to find, especially as we get older and people do start families and have their own priorities.
When I was younger my father told me, "Love is blind, but marriage is an eye opener. " I am 54 and never been married. My siblings have all been married. My oldest sister was married to 2 men at the same time. My brother has been married and divorced 5 times. Life has been hell for them. And that's just for starters. I have a wonderful woman in my life named Irene. She is the best person I know. So if you don't want to be married, go ahead and be happy.
After the shocking realization that my Brother's Wife had been cheating on him with a couple for years. Years of family get-togethers, parties, and 3 vacations. I'd rather stay single for the rest of my life than go through a possible cheating spouse. She's now the EX wife and now my brother has never been more heartbroken.
This resonated with me so much, I lost myself in a relationship, and found myself in solitude. I have the freedom and the responsibility to work on my goals, my dreams, and also my friendships. Being single also improves my self development, personal judgement, and it makes me easier to say no to things and people who dont align with my principles. Love can be a very beautiful feeling if it starts from loving oneself first.
I think the key is "do you feel lonely?" If you do, you need a relationship. You know how you can get one, think about it. If you don't feel lonely, then you get to choose. I don't have feelings of loneliness so I choose to be single. I do get bored, however, so I enjoy my family/friendships/romances. Being single doesn't mean no sex/intimacy.
I am currently a very happy single after a 13 year relationship. I'm Demi-Sexual, so after the one person I ever truely had a reaction to dumped me, my world crushed, but with time I realized how much I had compromised for my partner and that I hadn't been myself in years. Now I am back to bein me, making new friends all around and living my best life.
Love the art on this video. I also love the usual art (because it's cute), but an occasional art style like the one in this video also adds "painterly" spice to your channel. Please continue both art styles!
Great Video! I believe people can be happy single or in a relationship but I don’t like it when society pushes everyone to romance and marriage. Everything ain’t for Everybody. I’m steady finding new ways to enjoy my solitude and there is nothing wrong with that. I feel like some people really don’t understand how to be happy and single and that’s why they pressure other people into relationships.
Reasons for being single: #1. I have no need for friendship, friendship causes pain! Its laughter and its loving are in vain! #2. I don’t want to remember romance that has since died, if I never loved I never would’ve cried. #3. I like to be alone! Because _when I’m alone,_ *I hurt no one* no *_one can hurt me!_* Yep…
Such an inspiring video! To accept the situation and get the best time out of it should always be a first hand on rule. It’s definitely not easy always being lonely, but in the end you Can chose just how You want it to be. Everyone can learn from this, I believe so.
I dated people for 17 years and I didn’t ever warm up to it, but I didn’t realize that being single and happy was a choice! Now I plan on being single for the rest of my life and it’s so freeing!
Finally, the video for me. I don't care about romantic relationships so I can relate very much to this video. Romantic relationships have always been a negative for me, since if you mess up you could end up in a worse place than before
I literally heard what sounded like a couple screaming at each other next door through the walls after I woke up this morning. I then got up and chilled out for the rest of the day in peace and quiet in my flat. Life ain’t all that bad being alone 🙃
I kinda want to be single, and sometimes, i want to be in a relationship. I'm otherwise quite happy with my life, even if i feel lonely at times. I'm trying to find myself, and i have have begun to accept things. All i want is to be happy, and while i prefer to be left alone, i don't want to be forever alone. I hope i find myself and becomes happy. As of right now, i only want to buy a garden tractor i can use. I don't much care about the future or the past, but i do try to live in the present. As a guy who suffered from depression and suicide attempts, i do have trauma i need to heal. I don't know how to heal though, so i try to figure it out. I at least have two dogs who love me. It isn't my dogs, but my parent's dogs, but the dogs and my parent's cat just love me more than my parents
Honestly, i love the way things are for me (not in a relationship). I'm already feeling overwhelmed by things as of lately. I love spending my free time playing games
Thank you for making this. I’m 28 and iv always been told to be in relationship my whole life. Iv begin to accept that I’ll be alone most of my life. There ups and downs.
I was married for eleven years. My blood pressure during that time was so high that I was prescribed medication. I’ve now been single for eleven years, and my blood pressure, sans medication, is normal. Just sayin’
Let's put it this way: if one cannot find one's ideal, one that truly checks all the boxes, then better remain single. Do not conform with less due to whatever pressure may arise.
I've never thought about it deeply honestly, I've just never felt the need to have a special someone, like the actual thought of it just never comes to my mind.
Timestamps 1). Strengthening bonds 0:41 2). Permission to be selfish 1:23 3). Look within 2:25 4). Mental health 3:30 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Personally I've never experienced a full-blown relationship (although I am only 20 so it's still fairly early days), so romantic relationships are still a pretty foreign concept to me. I do find myself yearning for that experience from time to time but equally I have learned particularly over the past couple years that there is a lot I have yet to learn and work on about myself, confidence, expression, past trauma etc. I think I've gotten into a good mindset where I want to focus on making myself happy and comfortable with my own life before I try to make someone else happy in a relationship. The way I see it if I'm gonna enter a relationship with someone I care deeply for then I want to be able to fully commit to it, without any insecurities holding me back if possible :) Great video as always Psych2Go! 😁
How obvious is it the being in a relationship can lead to trauma if your partner is abusive? Really? My wife was mildly abusive because I couldn’t join her in her religious activity. She got dismissive and withdrawn. She also fought cancer for the last half of her live, most of the 33 years we were married. We had three children and the question of why I wouldn’t go to church never came up between me and the kids. I stayed because I loved her, she was lively, smart and loved the kids unconditionally as I tried to. I’m still good friends with the children though she’s been gone for a bit over ten years. The idea of another relationship is not something I would ever do again. I don’t know that it’s because my wife and I had these issues or that she died or whatever but I can’t see how I could fit someone in here.
Thank for putting all these very valid points so beautifully… I am going to forward this video to all those people who are always trying to convince me that my life is meaningless if I am not in a relationship. No matter how many times I tell them the benefits of being single… it just doesn’t seem to enter their thick skull that a person can be very happy and satisfied in life even if they are alone and not in a romantic relationship.
Was this video helpful for you as a single person? We have a special project to share at the end. Do watch it if you haven't seen it here: th-cam.com/video/gx8HCC18aJM/w-d-xo.htmlsi=IABBlqsDHNgYS_l5
Me a person who tried to get a girlfriend and she thought it was wired: yup this sounds like me
I'm a near 38 year old who never had a relationship, not for lack of trying, but I consider myself a really happy person. Love my life. Hearing that having friends and family that support you mitigates feeling of loneliness made a lot of sense to me, that is very interesting to know. It also helps that I greatly enjoy my own company.
But I struggled pretty hard in my 20s. Which makes me think that there might be some physical, hormonal component that hits people really hard from early teens to mid 20s. It's like your mind punishes you for being alone.
And then later in life it just... stops... kind of. But that's probably a lot to do with me just maturing a bit every year.
I strongly prefer this animation style over the previous ones. Very nice.
Your videos feel like the same thing. “It’s okay to be alone and single.”. And it is getting kinda old. Maybe that’s just me but I sure as hell hope I’m not the only one who is noticing this annoying pattern. I might unsubscribe.
I am 52 years old and I have always been single, because I have never found a single woman who wanted me. I am single because of the choice of women. And this sucks, because I would like to at least try the experience of a couple to mature. Being single for me must be a choice, but only after having tried all the options including casual sex
Thank you for breaking the societal rules of the "life has only purpose when in a relationship". It's so hardwired in us. There is nothing wrong with being alone.
I'm honestly just now realizing I had this problem my entire life
yeah
After all the painful years recently I've actually learned to be happy by myself for once without needing much social interaction I try to forget the tragic past and don't worry about the grim future too much i just live in the present moment and enjoy every moment of this precious life as much as I can everyday this is the way to live trust me LIVING IN THE MOMENT and SELF LOVE is key you don't need anybody else to tell you how to really live your own life we all came into this world ALONE and we'll leave it ALONE
Speak for yourself, some of us don't appreciate isolation nor loneliness.
It’s not true for everyone though. For some people there is a lot wrong with being alone. You don’t even have to be extroverted either, for some of us it is important to have a significant other to confide in or to “complete us” (only on my first coffee so couldn’t think of anything less corny)
I'm 26 and I've been single all my life. While I do like the idea of being in a relationship, I've also realised that I like being alone and I hate compromises. And when I see the problems couples face, I feel relieved. But who knows what future has in store for me?
I’m 21 and also resonate with this situation. Although I do sometimes think being in a relationship is enticing… my me time is more enticing. And I haven’t met anyone who could change my mind. Who knows 🤷🏻♀️
@@kikizuli7813you're both young and I can confirm after being all my life in a relationship that you're not missing out NOW. Teenage romance (as in, those feeling when you're a teenager) however is something that everyone should experience
After that the dating landscape becomes full of compromise that are usually not met because nobody wants to compromise
I also have a friend who swore that they'll be single for the rest of their life who's now on track to getting married. You never know how life can surprise you! :)
As 33-year-old I can totally relate. Although I have longed for love, relationship, closeness and so on I think that I'm on a good way to just accept life the way it is now for me.
And I think that's a good, if not the only good way to deal with it, as trying to force a romantic relationship in a almost desperate way has not so great chances for success.
I guess the first step is to fully accept ("love") yourself, before loving and especially also being loved in a relationship by someone else.
I'm 43. I have had so many co-workers come up to me and say, "You are so lucky you are single." The number one reason for unhappy marriage that I have noticed is not being able to detect the spouse has a major mental illness and is unwilling to go to therapy. The most common one is narcissist. To detect this watch out for people who can not take criticism. The second is postpartum depression in women. Which really seems like more of a ptsd to be honest. The wife became more controlling along with other issues.
1.strengthening bonds 0:43
2.permission to be selfish 1:24
3.look within 2:25
4.mental health 3:31
Hope this helps and have a great day :D
It helped me a lot, thank you!
Thanks!
Thank you! That is really helpful
Thank you so much for the time stamps!
As a woman who consistently dated from 13-24, I definitely want to say that I have been the happiest as a single woman for the last few years. I occasionally dip my toe into the dating pool but find that they just don't fit my life. Lots of people need to really heal and go to therapy before they should try dating as an adult. Good luck to everyone, on whatever path you choose.
Therapy doesn't help and if someone's never been in a relationship past 25 it feels like they're broken and it'll never happen, especially when it's waved in front of you like a carrot and then yanked away because you're too slow. And there's no other way to satisfy sexual desire besides masturbating and eventually that gets depressing.
Same. Relationships from 15-26 this is longest I've been single since I was 16 and I'm really loving it
Thanks for letting us know that singleness can be just as fulfilling as being in a relationship! :)
Lol thats impossible😂 being single woman, all women is occupied in 2023. Quit framing yourself as something you arent😂
Literally how do you consistently find people to date though? 😂
Oh, thank you for this! I’m so tired of people telling me I can’t be happy unless I have a man in my life.
UR SO REAL FOR THAT
As someone who wants a real genuine relationship, I know that your happiness doesn't come from anyone else but you. You shouldn't look outward for love because outward is the direction it goes. Love yourself I love will come in the direction of the the heart you love witch is yours. 🩷🩵🪽
I couldn't agree more
Yes. I hate that. Like I genuinely enjoy being alone and not being around people all the time. It's refreshing and I get to be me and to relax. I'm more than just being someone's gf or wife. I don't want to get married or have kids. I love being with me.❤️
Same!
This really resonates with me. I used to be single and really, really lonely and craved a relationship to feel fulfilled. But I've been single for 11 years and through the wonderful support and social stimulation of family, friends, and the platonic cuddling community, I've reached a point where I'm having a really good time being single and not compromising myself for someone else. I no longer feel like another person is what I NEED to feel whole and complete. I'm complete on my own.
What is this platonic cuddling community you speak of. I need a flippin hug.
Sounds pretty sad.
Having gone to a cuddle party, it's not enough for me.
@@LemonCookiessearch cuddle party online. Or just start doing partner dancing.
Same then i got into relationships and didn't like them lol
I have been single my whole entire life. I have never dated before, and I am staying that way. I realized that I was only focused on dating and sex because other people do it and I wanted to fit in. I am happily single and celibate. 🤗😇😇😇
Whenever those feelings of loneliness come creeping in, I always remind myself:
Even if this sucks, what would suck more is having to deal with someone else’s problems. Just thinking about the possibility of having to change myself for someone else is enough to turn me away from dating in its entirety.
be alone, not lonely bruh. Go outside, talk to your family or friends
@@spike1670 ok but what do random acts of kindness have to do with relationships?
As an introvert Aromantic and Asexual I have noticed people think Introverts live a sad life because they don't like connecting with people but what people dont understand is that introverts love being alone. People will always tell me to get out more but I honestly don't want to and they get mad. But I love my peaceful life. I only have platonic love not romantic love. It's not that wanting to be single means you have no love we do have love but not the romantic and sexual love.
It's tiring getting pressured to be In a romantic relationship.
I completely agree with this 👏
I'm so glad you made this 😭 So sick of being told I'm not worth anything unless I've got a woman.
They are stupid babe. Enjoy your life
@@scientificnameofpigs heck I'm in my late 20's and I still have zero desire to be in a relationship. It just sounds like more trouble than it's worth
Society moment, just dont listen to them and be yourself :)
@@GriffintheBased Late 30s here and same 🙋
Thank you. Your worth does not depend on your relationship status. You're an awesome person because you are who you are :)
I'm now 68. I've had three major live-in relationships, each of which lasted years. My last partner is now my very best friend. But most of my life has been lived as a single. And frankly, it took me quite a while to realize how much I loved being single. For one thing, the freedom is amazing. Also, I think lifestyle compromise is much easier when you are younger. If I was to meet a good potential partner now, I would definitely be willing to explore a relationship, but I would need my space (and by that I mean my own domicile and lots of built in solitude). Also, I love single travel and have done a lot of trips on my own. So join me in pausing to think of all that is wonderful in being single! I am content and happy. 🍀
I am glad I’m not alone in this feeling of contentment I get from being alone. At almost 43, I have been alone more I think that I have been in a relationship. I’ve had a couple of live in girlfriends, but one was a narcissist (I’m pretty sure) and the other one was younger than me and the generation gap was just kind of weird after a while.
I'm only slightly younger than you and most of the time, I'm ok being alone. You mentioned holidays but I can't find a holiday package for single people. It always ends up double the price. Do you know of any companies in Europe that cater for solo travellers ?
I’m 46 and single for the first time since I was 14. I’m still very uncomfortable going in public alone, like to a restaurant, let alone travel alone. I love to travel and am seeking a travel companion. I never considered going alone. Maybe I’ll give it a try.
My reason for being single: Why the hell would I want someone around who's just going to cause unnecessary bullshit and stress, making my life more difficult than it has to be?
Exactly 💯
That is very much facts I love being single I don’t want a crummy relationship
Learning to be alone and actually enjoy your own company is a gift. Knowing that relationships are only supposed to ADD to your life… not be your life.
Single forever! I thought I was crazy for not wanting to be in a relationship. I grew up with an overly-toxic brother and every time I got into a relationship, I'd just see a side of the guy that reminds me of my brother and I'd just end things. So I decided never again.
Here's to us, the singletons!🍻
im just a hopeless romantic with high standards and searching with no rush for an ideal partner,if i wont find them then im convinced of being the rich independent and strong aunt WEWHEHEHEEE (i cant even clean my room)
omg this is so me.
A hopeless romantic all my life
Surrounded by couples all the time
@@snaukball8764i guess i should take it as a signnnnn
th-cam.com/video/IGhaLFmLPUw/w-d-xo.html
I guess I should take it as a signnnnnnn
i love being single because i have carte blanche to do whatever i want. i love being alone. i'm not interested in dating
I am so glad they made this video because I feel like I am better of as single for the rest of my life
We hear you. Wanting to be single is quite relatable..
same feel
Same
Some things are fun to do alone, some times aren't.
Being single from my experience gives you more of a feeling of independence in my opinion. Should you avoid relationships? I wouldn't say so, because having a great time with a girlfriend is nice, even though that might come with some downsides or even sacrifices. It heavily depends on the person in the end, but I personally wouldn't avoid relationships when it's probably going to be a good one.
@@anderstermansen130 That must be coming from bad experience.
Understandable, if that's the case, but you can't really stop people from attempting to get into one.
it's because relationships have changed with time. Now living in a social media world, there's high expectations from either side which brings the shitty quality in people eventually
@@PrivateForPersonalReasonsA person doesn't have to come from a bad experience to come to that conclusion. They can just see the hassle and conclude it's not for them. I don't have to rob someone to know that I don't wanna be a robber. Just hearing about it is enough.
@@odenkazsometimes I believe the Buddhists are onto something with “true peace is when you learn to let go of expectations”
Sacrifices?.. its about finding compromises both people are ok with and respect each other in the process
The best part is you never have to deal with felling jealous, you don't have to worry if someone really likes you or if they stopped loving you and you'll never fear being abondoned out of the blue or being cheated on. Also, you won't have to go through break ups
So much happier single! Been married, had kids, love them but can’t ever see being a couple again. And people who say “who will take care of you when you’re old” - there’s so much divorce and loss that there’s no guarantees anymore.
Don't expect anyone to take care of you. Kids will put you in an old age Hell-hole, and forget you exist.
I spent 14 years, give or take, in an abusive relationship so staying single doesn't the hold same sting for me that it will for some. For the first time I'm able to put myself first, I can keep on top of everything and I feel content. I honestly can't see myself trying for romance again, I'm happy in my quiet little bubble 🙂
Let the animator know that they're brilliant, this is amazing
@@rosielamu earned a sub for the art style :’)
@@alexanderhopkins7837 rlly appreciate it :,) thank you!!
@@rosielamYw :D!!!
I prefer her voice...very soothing
I LOVE being single. I have also proven myself I can be the best partner ever. My last relationship was pretty toxic so I decided to end it. Thankfully we both agreed to it, because he acknowledged his posessiveness. So even in tears, we knew we had to part ways. Ever since I've been single and I don't miss being in a relationship, honestly. One could argue I just don't feel like going through all the toxic stuff again, but that isn't the case. Of course I'd like a healthy relationship, If I ever fall in love again, but I'm not actively searching for it. I'm good being single. But I'm not closed to the idea of having a relationship again. If I have to be single forever, then so be it, I'm ready for it. Whatever happens, I'm ready for it.
Honestly, being aroace actually means it's a lot easier for me to just stay single forever. I'm just not the type to really be in relationships myself, and it took me a while to figure out that I don't need to do something I don't want to do just to be happy. Besides, I always have my family and my dog if I want unconditional love and support 👍
same
ur so real for that
Samesies - also an aroace here
I think this is it for me, too. I'm asexual as well, and have never been in a relationship. I went on a couple of dates with a guy while I was in college 15 years ago, but nothing since. And I'm mostly okay with that. I don't really want to be in a relationship. The peace of being alone is too precious.
Hey fellow aro aces ✌️😁🤠
I'm so much happier being single despite what my friends and family believe.
I used to feel insecure about being single when I was younger. But now it seems like it's impossible to see myself otherwise, as if it's destiny.
I've recently just left a "situationship" of about 10 years. I've never felt so alive as I do now that she's no longer in the picture. I no longer hate myself, and have become my own best friend. I may never love again, that's no issue though, as I love myself for who I am :)
Happy for you, 10 years to only be a situationship is far too long. Love will find you unexpectedly if at all, life will be prosperous now nonethless!!
This was sweetly validating. Being single isn't about anti-love or anti-marriage. It's just about enjoying your own company to a degree that you wouldn't sacrifice it for anything that isn't worth it.
Being single gives us the full freedom to get right with GOD, to build into existence once lost relationship, between GOD and creation, between PARENT and child.
1 Corinthians Chapter 7 KJV
32 But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord:
33 But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.
34 There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.
35 And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.
this world presents love as lust, and if you`re not always touched, then you are not loved = lies and fear propaganda. All of it because the MK ULTRA PROJECTS from masons.
John 15:13 KJV
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
I'm actually content to be single, and don't find any pressure to settle down as of right now.
I´ve been single for a year and a half, and I´ve never been happier.
I love being with someone or in a relationship whenever I want to, but I love being by myself most of the time.
Perfect timing for this video! I've never been in a relationship and of course, when I was younger, I really wanted one and I tried and tried. Years of trying different looks, different approaches, taking advice from friends and brothers, but no one ever showed any interest in me or paid attention when I tried to show affection, and of course, the good old friend zoning! I thought there was something wrong with me for a while, but I've come to realize how happy I am alone and how I can't honestly picture myself in a relationship 😅 and that's okay! I'm quite content being alone with my cat and guinea pigs 😊
I have my pet guinea pigs & doggies to cuddle!! Us piggy lovers gotta stick together
Thank you for sharing with us. To be fair, relationships are hard! Though I hope that you'd maybe find someone worth dating one day, it's also great to hear that you're happy being single! :)
On a serious note, how are guinea pigs as pets?
@Psych2go They are great pets! But they are not for kids, or starter pets. They require daily cleaning, teeth checks, nail clipping, anal sack cleaning. Time consuming. I love ❤️ em!
@@Psych2go They are wonderful! I've had guinea pigs since I was about 8 and they are so much fun😊 very chatty as well 🤣
That's good to know. Having a pet, from what I hear, is very fulfilling. Based on your comment, I will consider a guinea pig as well!
I’m not happy with being single, but I can definitely appreciate all of the self growth and self reflection I’ve experienced the last few years. Being in a romantic relationship is stressful, no matter how good it is!! Take the time now to develop good habits and self care 😊
Me too
Learning how to be happy while single is essential, especially for me because I know I'm not getting a date any time soon... or at all lol.
Relatable af lol
I’m happiest without a partner and yet I adore being near my family for support - I don’t want someone else in my space , having to compromise for their needs, and not living the life I want to live. I love my friends and yet they never hold me back from following my goals (and vice versa).. my mental health is too precious to gamble on relationships
I just genuinely like being alone, so I can think without getting interrupted. Also some of the people hold me back, when they try to help.
I thought I am not normal lol! Everyone is in a relationship or getting married but I don’t feel the need to or want to be in a relationship. I don’t know if I am ever going to change my mind tomorrow but I feel good right now, I am at peace with myself..
This is me but my family and friends make me feel extreemly isolated about it. Why do people feel the need to add a title or identity to everything?
Nature
Same here, I feel amazing in my own bubble and enjoying the single life but my family just wants to be a pain. I don't suggest giving in to their nagging tho cause that usual leads to a abusive relationship and thats a big no no. Also your friends kinda suck😅
Ignore them. They aren't the ones living YOUR life, do what's best for you.
i can relate a lot and i know a lot of elders who have been single their whole life who are so content with everything
This is honestly what I was thinking last winter. I was single all winter and seasonal depression wasn't that bad because I could focus on myself. I got into a relationship just before summer and all my attention went towards them. I'm single again and I'm making it stay that way for my mental health.
I just absolutely love being single it gives me the sense of freedom comparing to my friends whom are in relationship
Agreed 👍
Right. For me personally I have less anxiety, stress, and I love being alone. I enjoy being with me and I don't want to share myself with anyone.
You forgot to mention something pretty important to me:
Being single means you get to meet a lot more people, first of all in a simple social manner, as
you're more likely to spend time outside the house, in search for connection.
Expanding your circle of friends and having a lot of people to talk to and places to visit, is more helpful in having a balanced and healthy state of mind, than spending a lot of time with one person, which is usually the case in monogamous relationships.
Secondly, being single does not mean you don't experience romantic love. It simply means you cultivate a habit of meeting new people and if you hit it off with someone, you can have that too and choose still , not to form a "now we are joining paths in life" type of relationship with them.
This can happen, because too often, we find ourselves amongst cool people but not people that we are compatible enough to be life partners with.
It is actually healing to meet girl- friends (and i guess boy-friends too) who you see now and again and can also experience intimacy and sex with, without it being a state of being 'in love'. But you can love them as people and feel attracted to them.
Being open from the get-go as to what each of you needs, leads to better communication and a healthier friendship, than say a relationship formed with someone you don't really want and most importantly, do not respect and/or trust to be your partner.
When you are ready, and if a person appears that really makes you feel you want to try being with in the full sense of the word, go for it.
And have the courage to admit to yourself, along the way, whether they are good to you or not, based on their behavior, not just their intentions.
Have fun:)
well, to me, having sex with someone would only be done when i truly LOVE the person. i dont like it when people normalize casually "going to the next level" (having sex) with someone, who is a mere acquaintance or a friend. that seems like very shallow behavior, but thats just my opinion.
@@armin1500 So I will try to point out a few things and you can work out the rest:
There is no true love without knowing who someone really is, to you and to the people around them.
Discerning character takes time.
How is it possible to know who someone truly is to you before having a relationship with them?
Ergo: The true love you speak of is the I HAVE A CRUSH type of situation. Which is incredible and usually ends up in you being in love and in a relationship.
If that's all you want, that is fine.
But that is not the only form of intimacy there is, or of romantic sex. Also most people fall in love AFTER having spent a lot of time talking with someone AND having had sex with them for at least a few times-weeks-months.
PS True love is companionship.
@@SaiyanMutant it might just be because i think im demisexual, which means i only have sex with a person or feel attraction towards them AFTER the emotional connection has been built
your view on relationships is kindof "pick-and-choose"-ey, but at least thats how i understood it
also its as if we MUST have sex with someone before actually entering a relationship with them, ergo the relationship inevitably fail?
also! you make it sound like you need to build some kind of group of people and spend time jumping from person to person whilst still having sex with them, and then you choose the one youre "satisfied" with. thats why it seems very shallow, sex should only be shared with someone that you TRULY trust, and only if you have an actual connection with them beforehand
@@armin1500 It's not about satisfaction.
But waiting for the right person, to form a relationship with.
Yeah being demisexual means this approach would be difficult for you.
Still, how do you define trust ?
I'm 22 and never been in a relationship, the reasons I feel lonely are because I'm changing lifestyle, my friends are changing and some getting further away and being home with family is both good and bad. It's like half relationship, it's full of people, but I don't enjoy 100% of my time. I wish for more calm and peace and fun.
I liked how you highlighted the positivity of being single.
FINALLY! I was searching for this answer.
I was so overwhelmed of "it's mandatory to be in a relationship"
Like... I have so much things i want to do in the future. Like making a visual novel game, a cat hotel shop with my best friend, being successful...
I also want to fulfill me and my brother's dreams and biggest plan together.
So basically, i just find me being in a romantic relationship kinda bothering me. And what i actually needed was a best friend :']
And i can't actually trust anyone in this generation because its ruined.
Also, if i was in a "romantic relationship", i have to be responsible of not making my "partner" upset. (And these days, if u do anything wrong that makes your partner upset, it will be something controversial or something).
I already had enough stress, i dont want more.
I like the animations very much they are so cute.
I am 17 years old,i decided to be childfree by choice because i realized the many benefits that exist when you don't have kids.
I did started to question myself if relationships are worth it,cuz i am an introvert and i always want to evolve and be better for myself.
And because i like being alone i think i want to be single by choice too.
I once knew a girl who despised children. (Way too young for me). I said : "I heard you got a job in daycare." She got really mad and said : "Don't even joke about that !"
i am 36 and single since birth by choice. 😌
Finally a video that doesn't make it seem like you're a weirdo or a loser for wanting to be single.
It’s not like I have a choice but nice to know either way 😅
On a more serious note, you have no idea how much this helps me and how perfect the timing was! I’m single, feeling very lonely at the moment and I often have a thought of ‘what if I’ll be single *forever*’ and this video helped, thank you ☺️ it could be that there’s not a person for me and I’m not meant for relationships, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It means I have more freedom and time to myself, so I suppose that’s good ❤
Of course you are meant for a relationship ! ! Don't start looking for it and give yourself space and time join clubs or work for organisations that have your goals and have like minded people . Didn't you know they recently found life before marriage / relationship and they are pretty sure there will be life after marriage / relationship as well !😉😘
You have a choice. Just sometimes the options aren’t what we desire, making it feel like we don’t have an option. Remember that….
well, this is all great and im glad youre all comfortable with yourselves, but i cant help but feel discouraged since i myself would really enjoy to have a partner who ill marry and be monogamous/committed to, yet with:
#1 the normalization of casual, meaningless sexual encounters
and
#2 the generalizations and expectations that usually come with dating and/or relationships (made by other people, at least) discourage me aswell.
these reasons make me feel as if what im hoping for (monogamy, equal commitment and loyalty/trust, etc) are just some kindof unrealistic expectation. i guess im mostly looking for closure or comfort here? sorry, this got a bit longer than intended, i hope you understand!
Thank you for making this video! I'm so tired of feeling like I'm somehow failing at being human because I'm not desperately seeking out a romantic partner. I'm 37, never been on a date, and frankly if I never am I'll be just fine.
As someone who has laboured under the the delusion that marriage was just part of life, I now, after 2 horrifically bad marriages wish I would have stayed single my whole life. I have no need for sex or intimate relationships anymore. I wish people would stop encouraging young people to get married instead of enjoying life unencumbered by another person 😢
The issue is the person is an encumbrance. If that was the case, it was doomed to fail no matter what. Both parties have to be willing to sacrifice and build together. You can test this while dating, then go from there.
I definitely believe we are created for connection but I don’t understand why it always has to be romantic. I have a lot of deep platonic love
I tend to flip-flop on this issue. While I often yearn for romance, I also enjoy being single. Being single for as long as I have been has given me time to reflect on my own well-being, fix my insecurities, and learn to love myself. I have to learn how to love myself before I can love another.
I've been single forever, but I do want a girlfriend. I love Valentine's Day, and I admit, I do love feminine things and characters in different shows, art, writing, animation, classical music, jazz, R&B, oldies, and romantic comedies.
uhh you might be gay then no offence
@@bartholomewwindow743lmao
Why do you love Valentine's Day? It's just a corporate money grab
There’s hope for you since you’re not an incel. Keep your chin up and your eyes open and maybe the right woman will come along for you. Best wishes.
@@bartholomewwindow743 Stop being stupid as hell. A man being into those things doesn’t make him gay. There are no “gay hobbies or likes and dislikes.” Simply likes and dislikes of individuals, regardless of male or female. If he we gay, whatever, but just because he likes those things doesn’t make him gay.
Psych2Go thank you so much for this video! As someone who is asexual and has multiple disabilities, I’ve always felt like I’ve preferred to be single because people wouldn’t understand that I would much rather work on improving myself than seeking out a relationship with someone. This also applies to me in regards to the fact that I am also aromantic and rarely experience romantic attraction with other people. I’m also introverted so I value my time alone to recharge my energy.
Most of the time people have started taking interest in me romantically or sexually, and I have to push them away because I am not ready or even interested in having a relationship with them. It becomes exasperating and a bit annoying after a while.
Hm... The "mental health" portion is the reason I feel like I should never be in a relationship. I mean, if I purposely make myself feel worse just to keep my life "interesting", it's a good idea that I never get in a relationship
I love the way this was animated! The colors and movements were all so warm and soft, it's beautiful.
I don't feel like it answered the question of "what if you want to be single forever" though. I got divorced several years ago, had a casual relationship off and on for a while, and now I'm wondering if i even want to be in a "serious" relationship ever again. My therapist would probably tell me I'll know when I'm ready, but i don't want to be ready; I'm perfectly happy living my own life.
Thank you for the feedback. We'll be sure to share it with the team.
As for your casual relationship, how has that been going? Do you feel like your relationship now is better than your committed relationship?
@@Psych2go my casual partner recently met someone who is a better fit for their life goals, so we're not seeing each other much lately. I'm very happy for both of them! I think our casual relationship allowed both of us to deal w trauma and heal in order to become better, healthier people. I love them as a person and I'm hopeful their new relationship brings them closer to their goals of having kids and getting married!
When I have been in serious relationships I tend to "lose myself" in the other person, and then I become very depressed. So I definitely think I need to overcome those tendencies before I get into another serious relationship, if I ever do. I'm not sure I want to see anyone right now, although I'm interested in meeting people outside the expectations of sex or a structured monogamous relationship. I think I need more friends and a better support network first, and I think monogamy / the traditional "relationship escalator" model just doesn't work for me.
From the way you're talking about your relationships, it sounds to me like you're very self-aware. I think that's a great place to start--to know your own tendencies in a relationship. I also completely agree with what you said about having a strong support network as the people in our lives will help us make better judgments in our relationships. I hope that your relationships in the near future will be amazing and fruitful. Thank you for sharing your story with us :)
I'm so glad a video like these exist. I've been single most of my life and from my experience of being around so many others in relationships. I've always been asked why am I so happy and chill and well no one believes or understands that's it cause I'm single. I don't need or care to be in a relationship but as a comfort for those around me who worry still like friends and family I say well if it happens it happens. Trust me when I say take care of yourself first and find happiness then. Not only when you're in a relationship.
as an aromantic person i see this as an absolute win
I have been single for more than 10 years and people are always telling me how I need to find someone. I am completely happy being by myself. I enjoy my own company and am Learning how to make myself happy. I love being by myself.
This man understands the way of single life.
@@anderstermansen130 what man?
Not to be harsh but did they say trash tv total drama is not trash it’s my childhood cartoon I’m on the 3rd season
Been traumatized in relationships. FEELS better just being single ❤ what's meant to be will be.
I spent the first 15 years of my life in a toxic household where favoritism ran rampant. Blatant affairs were happening left and right because of my mother's whoredom.
My younger sister and I were clearly neglected emotionally and physically, so we, of course, never learned what affection was. Our stepdad was an abusive drunkard that would constantly try to put the moves on me, even when I flat out told him I have no interest in that. My mother in denial about all of it. My older brother constantly getting recognition for doing all of the wrong things. Step siblings that were way too spoiled to even try explaining.
So I hope it makes sense as to why I want to have some alone time.
This video came at the exact right time. Let me tell you about my life.
I’m a girl who believes in love. I also believe in Healthy, beautiful relationships and love stories. However, the last time I fell in love, my ex took advantage of me in the worst way a woman could feel. I’ve lost my innocence, my life, dreams and myself. After a failed suicide attempt and 20 days in the hospital questioning my life and the betrayal. I realized, life is more than finding love or relationships. It felt like God gave me another life another chance to live. I can love myself, my own time, do what I love, be who I want to. Since then, I’ve decided to be single. I don’t know if I’ll ever love someone again cz the trauma I faced as a young teen, I can never forget. Love isn’t worth to loose a life so live it the best while you can. I really really love everyone one who faced something similar as me. Just so y’all know, being alone is completely fine. You don’t need a relationship to be happy. Life is so much more than that.
You've been through a lot of stuff... Whatever you are facing now, i believe in you, and you should believe in yourself! You can do this! Fulfill your dreams! >:3✨✨✨
@@Cntaur-sn9kh Thankyou so much hun
I'm in my twenties. I've never been in a relationship and I've never felt that special feeling towards anyone, really. But throughout my entire life I've always felt so pressured by everyone around me to have a relationship, and at this point I wonder - do I really need it or am I just affected by the fact that I don't have something that everyone else has? Thanks for the video. Lack of romantic interests seems to be my biggest concern atm 🥴
That sounds a whole awful lot like Aromanticism. I would know because I am Aromantic. In layman's terms, you might just not feel romantic attraction to others, or only feel it under rare circumstances, both of which are perfectly fine. I'd say look into Aromanticism, you might learn a bit about yourself from there.
I'll be thirty next month, never been in a relationship. The thought of being in one irks me to no end. Fortunately I've never been pressured by people to find a boyfriend (aside from this one neighbour who recently told me, twice, that I need to get one because I must be lonely. If he brings it up again, I'll have to tell this full-grown man to butt-out of my private life. He doesn't even know my name, for Pete's sake). They say the only certain things in life are death and taxes. I don't see "find a significant other" anywhere in that expression, do you?
If the previous two years taught people anything, it's to never follow what everyone else is doing just because people say you should. Being single is excellent. I feel sorry for people trapped in loveless, pointless relationships trying to convince themselves that they're "investing" in something. Life is too short to be unhappy. Free yourself.
I have decided i m gonna stay alone
Thank you so much for making this video. So many people just keep pushing the narrative that being in a relationship is inherently better. I've personally seen so many people stay in toxic relationships, or just be with people they don't necessarily have feelings for just for the sake of being in a relationship.
Funny. Just an hour before this was posted I was thinking of asking you to cover this topic. I’m single, and have been so for just over ten years. I have had flings there in between but I never felt like romantic relationships are my thing. Although, even if I enjoy being single, there is these odd days from time to time, like today actually, that I just wish that someone would be in my space and fill me with love from an outside perspective: it’s hard to always be the one picking yourself off the ground, since it can get tiresome - especially to always fight moments of self-doubt on your own.
Anyways, thank you!
After 15 years of abuse at the hands of men, I needed this video to help validate my life choices for my next 30 years. Thank you.
You weren't abused by men in general you were abused by certain specific men. If you don't take the time to separate the difference in your mind you will end even even more lonely and bitter.
Hypothetically speaking, what if someone isn’t looking for romantic love but is looking for platonic/sisterly love from a group of women but it’s too hard to find that… unless you’re in a sorority of course. I’ll be 30 next year and I don’t know if I’ll ever find that. I live without a relationship but not without friends.
This is more what I'm looking for, as well. Not a romantic relationship but a small group of platonic, beloved friends to be a part of. Really quite a hard thing to find, especially as we get older and people do start families and have their own priorities.
When I was younger my father told me, "Love is blind, but marriage is an eye opener. " I am 54 and never been married. My siblings have all been married. My oldest sister was married to 2 men at the same time. My brother has been married and divorced 5 times. Life has been hell for them. And that's just for starters. I have a wonderful woman in my life named Irene. She is the best person I know. So if you don't want to be married, go ahead and be happy.
I really love the art style on this video! Good job!!
Can you check out this video too: th-cam.com/video/gx8HCC18aJM/w-d-xo.html :)
@@Psych2go OML I LOVED IT TYSM!! CAN YOU MAKE MORE VIDEOS LIKE THAT?
I dont like it, looks like ai has kicked psy to the curb. snif
Right now I'm far too independent to be in a relationship. I'm happy with the way things are. Thank you for an interesting video!!👌😊
After the shocking realization that my Brother's Wife had been cheating on him with a couple for years.
Years of family get-togethers, parties, and 3 vacations.
I'd rather stay single for the rest of my life than go through a possible cheating spouse.
She's now the EX wife and now my brother has never been more heartbroken.
This resonated with me so much, I lost myself in a relationship, and found myself in solitude. I have the freedom and the responsibility to work on my goals, my dreams, and also my friendships. Being single also improves my self development, personal judgement, and it makes me easier to say no to things and people who dont align with my principles. Love can be a very beautiful feeling if it starts from loving oneself first.
I think the key is "do you feel lonely?" If you do, you need a relationship. You know how you can get one, think about it. If you don't feel lonely, then you get to choose. I don't have feelings of loneliness so I choose to be single. I do get bored, however, so I enjoy my family/friendships/romances. Being single doesn't mean no sex/intimacy.
I also realize sometimes I'm just bored and not really lonely
You’re right about that last part because you have the hub 😂
I am currently a very happy single after a 13 year relationship. I'm Demi-Sexual, so after the one person I ever truely had a reaction to dumped me, my world crushed, but with time I realized how much I had compromised for my partner and that I hadn't been myself in years. Now I am back to bein me, making new friends all around and living my best life.
Love the art on this video. I also love the usual art (because it's cute), but an occasional art style like the one in this video also adds "painterly" spice to your channel. Please continue both art styles!
Great Video! I believe people can be happy single or in a relationship but I don’t like it when society pushes everyone to romance and marriage. Everything ain’t for Everybody. I’m steady finding new ways to enjoy my solitude and there is nothing wrong with that. I feel like some people really don’t understand how to be happy and single and that’s why they pressure other people into relationships.
Reasons for being single:
#1. I have no need for friendship, friendship causes pain! Its laughter and its loving are in vain!
#2. I don’t want to remember romance that has since died, if I never loved I never would’ve cried.
#3. I like to be alone! Because _when I’m alone,_ *I hurt no one* no *_one can hurt me!_* Yep…
❤❤trueee
Such an inspiring video! To accept the situation and get the best time out of it should always be a first hand on rule. It’s definitely not easy always being lonely, but in the end you Can chose just how You want it to be. Everyone can learn from this, I believe so.
There is nothing wrong at all with being single forever, in fact it's much more preferable than being in a relationship with the wrong person.
Exactly 💯
I dated people for 17 years and I didn’t ever warm up to it, but I didn’t realize that being single and happy was a choice! Now I plan on being single for the rest of my life and it’s so freeing!
Finally, the video for me. I don't care about romantic relationships so I can relate very much to this video. Romantic relationships have always been a negative for me, since if you mess up you could end up in a worse place than before
Even though marital relationships are great! If they aren’t made for you they just aren’t. ❤
My single life has been treating me great i recently found a lot of myself being single and grown more mature
I literally heard what sounded like a couple screaming at each other next door through the walls after I woke up this morning. I then got up and chilled out for the rest of the day in peace and quiet in my flat.
Life ain’t all that bad being alone 🙃
I kinda want to be single, and sometimes, i want to be in a relationship. I'm otherwise quite happy with my life, even if i feel lonely at times. I'm trying to find myself, and i have have begun to accept things. All i want is to be happy, and while i prefer to be left alone, i don't want to be forever alone. I hope i find myself and becomes happy.
As of right now, i only want to buy a garden tractor i can use. I don't much care about the future or the past, but i do try to live in the present. As a guy who suffered from depression and suicide attempts, i do have trauma i need to heal. I don't know how to heal though, so i try to figure it out. I at least have two dogs who love me. It isn't my dogs, but my parent's dogs, but the dogs and my parent's cat just love me more than my parents
I'm convinced Psych2go is making videos according to my thoughts
Love that animation style!
:D !!!!
Honestly, i love the way things are for me (not in a relationship). I'm already feeling overwhelmed by things as of lately. I love spending my free time playing games
Thank you for making this. I’m 28 and iv always been told to be in relationship my whole life. Iv begin to accept that I’ll be alone most of my life. There ups and downs.
I was married for eleven years. My blood pressure during that time was so high that I was prescribed medication. I’ve now been single for eleven years, and my blood pressure, sans medication, is normal. Just sayin’
I've been single for ten years now and I am perfectly happy.
Let's put it this way: if one cannot find one's ideal, one that truly checks all the boxes, then better remain single. Do not conform with less due to whatever pressure may arise.
I've never thought about it deeply honestly, I've just never felt the need to have a special someone, like the actual thought of it just never comes to my mind.
Timestamps
1). Strengthening bonds 0:41
2). Permission to be selfish 1:23
3). Look within 2:25
4). Mental health 3:30
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I Don't feel right this video stuff.
Personally I've never experienced a full-blown relationship (although I am only 20 so it's still fairly early days), so romantic relationships are still a pretty foreign concept to me.
I do find myself yearning for that experience from time to time but equally I have learned particularly over the past couple years that there is a lot I have yet to learn and work on about myself, confidence, expression, past trauma etc.
I think I've gotten into a good mindset where I want to focus on making myself happy and comfortable with my own life before I try to make someone else happy in a relationship. The way I see it if I'm gonna enter a relationship with someone I care deeply for then I want to be able to fully commit to it, without any insecurities holding me back if possible :)
Great video as always Psych2Go! 😁
How obvious is it the being in a relationship can lead to trauma if your partner is abusive? Really?
My wife was mildly abusive because I couldn’t join her in her religious activity. She got dismissive and withdrawn. She also fought cancer for the last half of her live, most of the 33 years we were married. We had three children and the question of why I wouldn’t go to church never came up between me and the kids. I stayed because I loved her, she was lively, smart and loved the kids unconditionally as I tried to. I’m still good friends with the children though she’s been gone for a bit over ten years. The idea of another relationship is not something I would ever do again. I don’t know that it’s because my wife and I had these issues or that she died or whatever but I can’t see how I could fit someone in here.
Thank for putting all these very valid points so beautifully… I am going to forward this video to all those people who are always trying to convince me that my life is meaningless if I am not in a relationship. No matter how many times I tell them the benefits of being single… it just doesn’t seem to enter their thick skull that a person can be very happy and satisfied in life even if they are alone and not in a romantic relationship.