Rebound Relationships | What Are The Chances Of My Ex Coming Back
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ต.ค. 2024
- Explore the dynamics of rebound relationships and delve into the intriguing question: "What are the chances of my ex coming back?" Join us in this insightful discussion to gain a better understanding of the complexities surrounding post-breakup scenarios. Discover valuable insights that might just shed light on the potential for rekindling past connections. Subscribe for more relationship insights and advice!
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I was so hurt when she dumped me !
Now I see it's a blessing !
Hope she's doing well and wish her the best !
👍
Sorry to hear that man, but that’s a healthy mindset to adopt. Well done. 💪💪
@@billy77511 🤣
My ex left me for her “friend “ last September. They moved in together the beginning of January after I finally had enough and told her to leave our family home. We have a two year old which makes it harder. The first three months up until her moving out was tough because it felt like she was constantly rubbing my nose in it. Now she’s out of my life day to day I’m in a much better place and can now see I can do much better. They both lied and cheated to get together so they are welcome to each other!
I’m sorry to hear that buddy, but I’m glad you’re making progress towards your recovery.
My Ex fought with my mom saying i am disturbing her “friend”. This is the same “friend” who was hitting on her and called my pyschopath after we broke up and i was at my lowest and misrable state and she did not even defended me. Later i was diagnosed with BPD
I’m sorry to hear and I hope you’re getting the help you need with your BPD.
Be kind to yourself.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick Yes, taking therapy and help from parents. Its extremely tough to forget her , getting dumped was biggest fear, now that happened i have no fear just a will to not be needy and pathetic like i was. Sometimes the mood swings are painful. But each day i am stronger and better than yesterday. Long Journey ahead but have to keep myself strong for my loved ones who did not gave up on me even in this extreme time.
For Others having BPD and suffering from breakup pain, please take care of yourself and try to be better than yesterday. We will overcome everything. Have faith in your self, we are loving, we care caring and we are amazing ❤️🩹
The underlying message you are communicating in this video is fantastic. Also, just a side note: Can we please talk about the fact that dumpees rebound just as much as dumpers? In my particular case, I initiated the break up 7 months ago due to issues with alcoholism/addiction, broken promises, feeling that things were going nowhere etc. We were in a relationship for 2 years. Lived together, adopted a pet, made plans for the future, involved with eachothers families etc.
I did not fall out of love with my ex I simply was not equipped with the tools to 'save' him from his own bad decisions and irresponsible behaviors. Moreover, the relationship dynamic itself was becoming unhealthy and made me sick. I developed sudden panic attacks for the first time in my life. When I decided a breakup was imminent and there was probably no way around it at the time I still held out a sliver of hope that he would magically combust into the man he promised he would be. A few months later he contacted me out of the blue with some ruse about me still having stuff at his place and wanting to see the cat we adopted together.... and to announce his new "engagement" with someone else. Yep, true story folks.
Bottom line: People are who they are with or without you. People can and do change. I'm a believer in this. However, they dont change THAT much THAT quickly. If there were serious issues within your relationship and they did not spend an adequate time being single after the breakup to confront those issues and chose to jump ship instead well you have your answer. Doesnt make it any less painful but this is a case where you gotta keep your feet firmly planted in reality instead of letting your heart and imagination run away with "What ifs" and "If only ..."
Thank you for sharing.
You’re right, dumpees do rebound, and I’ve mentioned that in previous videos.
It never has and will never be your job to fix someone. Your job is to fix yourself and to ask yourself “why do I choose the men I choose”?
It’s his job to fix himself, it’s your job to fix yourself and to choose better men.
Who we lay with is a direct reflection of ourselves. That’s where your work lies.
I hope you feel better.
"People are who they are with or without you".
So if they're trouble with you do they change with someone else?
I avoided my last girlfriend for months because she was spiteful and demanding and disrespectful and the complete opposite of me. I gave her months to look at herself and change with my help but instead she went straight into another relationship.
Has she changed? Improved? She's middle-aged and should have learned to behave when she was younger.
@intoasoul The most likely answer is probably not! Its not impossible yet is improbable. Some people wake up and acknowledge the error of their ways when they are still young. This is preferable of course. Some only start to gain clarity in the second half of their life. Others simply don't arrive at that destination at all.
Intoasoul, people only change when the pain of staying the same is no longer an option.
Been married for 9 year's spend our hole 20s together last 4 years have been rocky but we always made it work. But this past September she left me for a "friend" from work. divorced me on January to be with him. Ofcorse its not easy and i felt very betrayed becuase i never ran away i delt with our problems...so even if she does come back. Idk if i would take her back ofcorse i love her. But such a betrayle ...idk. but no contact work on yourself and see what happends
Sorry to hear that buddy. Heartbreaking! 🫂🫂
If you focus on yourself when they rebound. The rebound practically hands your ex back to you on a silver platter. Just focus on you and that attracts them back. Chase and they run. Simple.
Why would you want them back after they rebounded?
@TheLoveFix-Nick .I can answer that. It's not that he wants her back. But he wants her to want HIM back. Then, it's his decision now.
@@TheLoveFix-NickI asked myself this question so much. Honestly I carry a lot of regret knowing that I lied and neglected my partner and she had no option but to breakup with me. If she came back after “rebounding” is hard on the ego, but I’m not gonna pretend like Im perfect and didn’t fuck up DURING the relationship. Ofcourse, the only way I’d take her back is if she made some personal progress too.
Lexo I’m sorry to hear that, but please be proud of yourself that you’re taking responsibility for your part.
That’s where true growth lies.
I hope you feel better.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick that’s a great question.
Thank you for acknowledging a ‘rebound’ can occur after time, not just immediately post breakup.
My ex fiancé had a quick rebound straight after, broke up after 3 months and then spent a year doing nothing by himself. Literally wouldn’t do anything, said he’s really lonely, didn’t make any friends etc. our separation got finalised in April and in May I learn he’s with a friend of his one friend. She’s driving him around, picking him up, doing all the things he told me I smothered him with.
She’s very plain looking, they have nothing in common except their jobs BUT she’s 2 years younger than him while I’m 5 years older.
I see this as the easy option to fill his void of loneliness and buys him time to think of a family - thoughts?
Assuming you’re correct, he’s made his choice.
Regardless of what you think about the situation, the end result is that he is with someone
His motivations don’t change the outcome. 😩
Avoidance of pain. Avoidance of being alone. Avoidance of working on ones emotional instability that possibly caused the break-up. I could be wrong but I think my ex was less concerned about our relationship and more interested in her next fix. That space had to be filled. She didn't work on our relationship and she didn't work on herself. She missed out on a very important discovery, and she will never be true to herself. But of course, she's on top of the world, probably, in her new relationship, and I'm struggling with deep depression after 3 years of what I hoped would be the best relationship I could ever have because we had been childhood sweethearts and met again decades later and it was like a fairy tale. How could we lose eachother again? We're not young now. There was nothing wrong with the relationship and she never blamed me for anything but she was a mess and didn't want to look at herself. It was easier to jump ship. What are the chances of her new relationship lasting? It's been almost 6 months. I don't know if they're still together because I cut her dead. My self respect is killing me. Is it worth it? Maybe I could have begged and pleaded but I just cut her dead.
Her behaviours are a reflection of her my friend, but what is a reflection of you is that you chose her.
That’s the hard truth we all must face.
Why did I choose this person?
Solve that and you’ll heal well.
I hope you feel better. 😊
New video for you mate what to do if they have rebounded and you want to get back together but you dont want to be rebound number 3 tell us what todo @TheLoveFix-Nick
Think I may have covered that already, buddy. In the rebound playlist, I think it’s called rebounding the rebound.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick cheers mate that's for the response I kinda just want to stop thinking about it all to be honest I don't want her back or anything just want to be at piece again I was happy on my own before all this
@TheLoveFix-Nick Thanks, Nick. You ask why I chose her? We first met over 35 years ago and we were just perfect for that one year but I wasn't working and needed to work on myself so told her to stay with her boyfriend whom she wanted to leave. It killed me. I never forgot her.
35 years later, recently, we met up, and it was a dream come true and my achievements surprised her and I had worked on myself. She was miserable and spoilt and wanted me to give her everything that she had blown. There was no respect so I distanced myself and she found someone else.
Has she really changed from all those years ago? I'm more likely to say no. What she showed was jealousy and a realisation she had blown her opportunities and she demanded that I support her.
I doubt if someone like that can change in any relationship.
Thanks, Nick. Great talk!
hey man, my girl of 4 years dumped me 1 week after our anniversary and went to another country for school exchange for half a year. She still watches my stories but completely removed me from their ig today. Im doing better and getting ok with the change but Id be curious to know if you think this trip abroad will help her move on or will she might come back when shes back in town? she said she lost feelings and it felt more like a friendship recently. Ty if you answer
I’m sorry to hear that man, and I hope you’re okay.
The trip is irrelevant.
With women, it’s all about emotion and emotional security. Therefore, it’s irrelevant where they are.
You’re both still young, and probably still think love is meant to be a feeling, when it’s meant to be a choice.
The initial feeling always fades, therefore love is a decision to choose our partners even when the butterflies go away.
I doubt she is old enough or mature to understand that yet.
Nothing easier than catch a broken heart on the rebound. Some may work out. Some may not. Eventually 99% of all relationships don’t last forever though.
So that means we will change partners till we die? No stability?
Depending on the generation .. some of us were the last generation before computers and cell phones . Yeahhh that real life :)
My ex left 7 months ago after being together for about 9 yrs. She is now in atleast her 2nd relationship that i know of since we broke up. Whats that all about? She still stalks my IG too even though we dont follow each other
I’m sorry to hear that buddy.
What’s is about?
What do her actions tell you?
Im assuming that shes still interested in me and what im doing
That’s a project of your preferred outcome. The truth of the situation is she left your relationship. It’s harsh and it’s brutal but i don’t want you to hang around for someone who is already with someone else.
My ex is too stubborn to even consinder trying for me I believe. It’s over in my eyes too. But how do I stop the pain of the aftermath. I.e her rebounds, secrets and what she’s doing. Why does it bother me if I know where over. I do believe I’m not over IT though. The situation. I’m still
Healing
Buddy, you can’t stop the pain. Pain isn’t their to hurt you, it’s their to teach you. Also you’re grieving and that’s okay. You can’t force.
You can help things along with exercise, meditation, journaling and so on.
Try starting a new hobby and volunteer somewhere.
I hope you feel better.
We have a kid together. She wasn't perfect but i got complacent and we both were nasty to each other towards the end. Neither willing to make changes so the other would. She monkey branched... Part of me would take her back if you wanted to come back just so I know we both gave it our 100% effort before throwing the flag in.. If she came back and i gave it my 100% and she left again i would sleep better knowing i gave it my all..i miss the family unit we had..7 years together... That couldn't have been for nothing.. suspicious she's a narcissist though... We both demonstrated red flags... My actions were reaction and her actions were a reaction... It's been 2 months im still in a rough spot emotionally and mentally but I've been working on myself and making a lot of life improvements
That’s rough, but it feels like you both gave it 100% already, based on your own personal metrics. It’s just those metrics didn’t align or were unwilling to change.
If she came back, nothing will change unless you both went through a fundamental mindset shift.
Do you want her back or do you just miss the idea of her?
I hope you feel better.
Shes at his house.spending the night....i miss my lua
I’m sorry to hear that.
I know it’s rough and you feel better.
It’s going to be okay.
if my husbond come back from the rebound . Will i be the new rebound ?
Let me ask you this.
Why would you take him back after he rebounded?
@@TheLoveFix-Nick I can think of a few. But it mostly boils down to personal opinion and how forgiving you are.
For me, my wife rebounded within weeks of leaving me after a big blow up.
Yes I am mad at her. Yes I hate how disrespectful she was to me, our kids, and our family for how selfish she is being. But I also understand the underlying psychology behind self preservation. I also understand that people make the wrong decision (me included) when highly intense emotions are involved.
But more than anything, I remember the good and the bad times of our relationship and know we had something good. And I know that if we can truely work through our problems, and move past the big negatives of our relationship and use that experience to mature and learn, then we could have an extremely strong bond that will be hard to break. Not saying its that easy, but when you know something is worth it, then you are willing to put in the effort.
That being said, I am also prepping myself for the opportunity to move on. I know there is nothing set in stone. But it doesn't mean I don't want to be with her, because I know how great of a person she truly is when she isn't trying to run away from the pain.
I personally think that if your person rebounds and returns to you, as much as it hurts & feels disrespectful, it shows that he truly loves you 👐 Sounds sick, I know but nothing in life is black & white!. Life is about adventure & variety it's a natural desire. If he/she went to someone else and returned to you, & Is explaining to you that nothing is better than you, this means they realise who they love. It's an important feeling to have in a relationship, especially a long relationship. This is life... This is love.. This is experience & potential growth in a person.. this is what it takes to be with someone forever after being through thick and thin. This is Balance 🎉
I disagree.
It shows they took the easier option of a rebound, and when that failed, they rebounded back to you.
Essentially, you become the back up of the back up option.
Someone who truly loves you, wouldn’t jump ship and rebound on you.
They would stay on the ship and help you keep it sailing.
I hear you, and to a point you’re right.
But ultimately, if you can’t sooth yourself 80% of the way, then it’s not reasonable to expect someone to do that for you. They can give 20% reassurance.
Emotionally exploding can be a relationship killer.
Take that explosion and try to think how that would feel, if you were on the receiving end of that. How would you have felt? Scared? Confused? Wanting to get away to safety as soon as you could?
I hear you and it’s painful when it’s not returned.
Let me ask you this.
Are we entitled to someone’s time and sympathy?
Why?
Why does anyone owe you?
This is a woman perspective, it is completely different for a man to take back a woman after she’s been intimate with another man. It goes against our biology and is repulsive to us. We cannot wife up a woman who has done this.
That might be the experience of my ex-husband, a severe avoidant. After 15 years married, he divorced me and almost immediately started a relationship with a woman. He said he needed a "flatmate", someone to share a flat and its expenses. Weird, isn't it? They have been living together for 6 years now and he keeps referring to her as his "flatmate". My eldest daughter says they live together but they live sort of separate lives. It's probably his ideal relationship: with all the perks of a relationship but not as committed as in a marriage (they go on holidays separately, for instance).
He probably tries to bury (always swiping things under the rug) his pain in this relationship. He broke up with me fast and furious and everything was very confusing: one day he loved me and the day after he despised me...heartbreaking. We have little contact because of our children.
So yes, depending on the circumstances, I believe rebound relationships may last for years.
Thank you for sharing.
Sounds like he did you favour. Better men out there.
Is an ex rebounding to you considered a rebound? 😅😂
If they rebounded, then rebound back to you too sooth their pain, then yes.