Thats small town humor my dude. I live in a small Appalachian township so its just like that. Boogie press...I'm a horror writer (almost done waiting on NoSleep to assess my stories. PERCEPTION got picked up early by a small narrator named Madame Raven) does that name have to do with scary stories? 😈😎😇
He steals or at least stole from the dead though. When he says 'the age old question that you could write a cheque and take their physical money' was random af and a confession, Theo calls him out on it at the end.
@@JonnyUnderrated people forget theo is 40 dam near 50, he was making sure just incase the lord took him in early, that he take everything he had on him with him
@ my brothers funeral I just so happened to be wearing two matching rings, I didn't really think about it or notice until I was viewing him saying my last goodbyes.. anyway his fingers were far thicker than mine lol so I just placed one of the rings in his hand.
My father died in 2002 when I was 15. He is a VET and ex CIA. He was my baseball coach for a lot of years. I put my baseball glove in there and my whole team signed a baseball and put it in their....RIP dad I love you. Struggle is real VON. I have ptsd because of it. Its really hard. Thank you for your videos you help me a lot.
@@launchpadmcquack9305 Basically yeah! One of those guys who didn’t want to send anything to a repair shop or get anything new. If he couldn’t fix it or keep it going he didn’t want any part of it!
Dude! In South Africa we've had that. Guy was buried IN his Mercedes. Body was propped up in the driver's seat with his hands on the wheel. th-cam.com/video/Lz_vGjHsOts/w-d-xo.html
Quite a few years ago, my circle of friends (being DBZ fans) we distributed a collection of dragon balls amongst ourselves. With the metaphor that whomever of us goes first, we'd collect the dragon balls and wish for them back. Now, we're not under the fact that that would ever work, but the sentiment is nice. And unfortunately last year the first of us passed, and we couldn't collect the dragon balls because some were lost. We buried with him the ones we could find. And redistributed a new set amongst afterwards.
@@Sjcstro84 no, I don't know what you're sayin. Know what I'm sayin?! Jk man, but really I don't know what tsa has to do with this other than narcotics, which they aren't even good at finding. I've gone through many tsa screenings with contraband that they would've considered illegitimate( Fleshlights, nerf guns, confetti, etc).
Sitting up for days swearing eternal allegiance to each other,only to have the binge come crashing down and you realise you wouldn't cross the street to piss on his head if it was on fire
All the fat actually pushes up on the fat peoples lungs when they’re sitting which can make them get out of breath. Ironic considering it’s hard for fat people to stand too lmao
We were still getting hospital bills from the VA after my Daddy passed. It hurt us terribly. My mom wrote “forward to Heaven” and sent them back. Also my cousin was the biggest pot head where we live. After losing him, we had his friends come in and put buds and joints in his pockets and rolled up in his sleeve. Someone called the damn cops about people bringing drugs in. Made me so mad. Not like they’re doing a drug deal, sending him with something he loved. I’m glad that there was some that the cops didn’t find and he was able to be sent with a little bit. Love and miss you, Billy
A funeral director once called the cops on me & my friends for putting weed into our buddies casket🤦 thankfully though!! The cops didn't bother us or even care about it. Nobody was smoking at the service & nobody was selling it and they weren't gonna do paperwork for a dead guy "in possession" of some weed 😂
That funeral director sounds like a bit of a stuck up ass. What a thing to do. Just let the loved ones and friends do what they feel at the funeral ffs.
My best friend was a heroin addict for 13 years. He requested to be buried with his favorite syringe. (3ml 23 gauge). I told the funeral director and he didn’t care at all😂
I used to work at a cemetery and I’ve seen people leave toys, alcohol, weed, powdery substances I can only assume was coke or meth, tobacco and all sorts of different shit. I’ve seen a man pull out a little .25cal handgun put a foot on the dirt pile and give a gangsta gun salute. I’ve seen people sit on graves and get high, sleep, and read books. It’s amazing what you see when working with the dead.
My family friend died from s**cide. Not only was his casket this absolutely gorgeous hand carved piece of art, but he had on the most beautiful headdress with stunning beadwork made from turquoise and all kinds of other stones. He had on a traditional chest piece made from bones and beads, and a full buckskin outfit. He looked absolutely regal. Saddest funeral I've ever been to, though. His wife collapsed by his casket and started screaming at him for leaving her behind. He had such awesome kids, too. I don't judge anyone for doing it, I don't like when people call it a "selfish act" because they never truly understand what's going on in someone's head. But I am a Christian and I do know it's against God's law. Plus, you leave behind you a wake of people who think it's their fault or that they didn't do enough for you in life. Your existence means so much more, to so many more than you could even imagine. But when you're struggling, it's hard or impossible to see it.
My aunt passed away earlier this year, and we all knew she really loved butterflies, so every member of the family took a big butterfly sticker and stuck it on the casket. It was beautiful
A friend of mine died from a heroine OD and someone thought it was a great idea to put some crack , weed, and lighter ..... everyone was shortly escorted out
Girlfriend it goes by so fast. Don't miss a beat with your grandparents. I remember when it seemed a lifetime away. My grandparents have been gone 10 years now.😭
I put a nice big purple bud in my dad's pocket when he passed away. It stunk up the whole Funeral Home lol. Still to this day it's in his pocket Six Feet Under. Rest in peace pops
@@jerrynadler2883 it was a nice big three G blackberry Purp bud lol. The most purple but I've ever seen in my life. I got an ounce of it right before my dad's funeral and put up nice big nugget in his pocket
At that funeral home I work at we accidentally forgot to take off a grandmas diamond engagement ring and buried her with it. We offered to disinter her and get it back but the family didn’t want to disturb her. The ring was was a family heirloom.
I always said to my mom that if my grandfather dies, someone should keep the watch. My stupid cousin took that 1950s omega to a jeweller and asked for a BATTERY REPLACEMENT. They then claimed the mainspring was broken, easy fix for a watchmaker. They ended up burying him with a 1950s omega mechanical watch. When he got it they were of a higher prestige than a rolex. It was his watch that he had on every day for 50 years so I suppose it was fitting. But as a watch enthusiast, it would've been nice if we kept it because it's a real vintage piece.
One of my ex bosses when he passed away had his Driver (golf club ) buried with him. He was also a MAJOR University of Michigan fan, so he of course had his hat, sweat shirt and football with him so he was always ready for a game when watching down from above!
I do love this gentleman, he's great! Interesting, informative, & good sense of humor without being disrespectful to deceased. But for followup still pleading for Caitlin Doughty :-)
We buried my mom in her favorite swimsuit, with sweatpants, and fuzzy socks. It was underneath a nice cardigan and we only had the top half of the casket open, so you couldn’t even tell. But she would have absolutely loved it.
My dad died 3 months before his first grandchild was born. I was pregnant with my son, we knew it was a boy & that he'd be named after my pops. He desperately wanted to live long enough to hold him. We were denied that luxury. One of a few things we put in his casket was my ultrasound pictures. That baby is now 20yrs old & I love that he shares his name with his Papa.
bit.ly/theovonclips
When our friend died we rolled the most beautiful joint and sneaked it into his pocket during the service. Stay lifted Sean, miss you everyday.
I did this too R.I.P. Kelvin
A fellow friend who was a musician died like 9 years ago and we put his trumpet inside the casket
bloody legend, rip to your mate
That’s beautiful man
Rip Sean the legend
Big Homie was a champ rolling with Daddi’s stream of thought punches.
Hahahaso true and well worded my friend.
Well said
You ever notice how Morticians always have very nice watches ? Thats suspect to me.
@@JonnyUnderrated Somebody's dead rich uncle is missing a rolly
@@JonnyUnderrated they making that money every damn day,, shit, job security is a definite
No tsa when u flying up to heaven 😅
Word
Best line
Gold
Literally heard that and went right to the comments lmfao
i was going to post that...pmfaooo
Did said “8ball and i ain’t talking bowling” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Be pretty hard to bowl with a tiny ball like that haha
Not a bowling term anyways that is why only you made the comment.
@Liam Bell well, he did said it ; )
Ain’t no drug sniffin’ dogs in the FH!
Did said? What? Lol
“There no tsa when you’re flying up to heaven” had me 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
This Mortician is a cool dude, love how he is hangin with Theo and his strange comedy.
Thats small town humor my dude. I live in a small Appalachian township so its just like that. Boogie press...I'm a horror writer (almost done waiting on NoSleep to assess my stories. PERCEPTION got picked up early by a small narrator named Madame Raven) does that name have to do with scary stories? 😈😎😇
Which leads me to my next point…..don’t smoke meth
@@LastMoonboy beautifully delivered
@@OliversWorld333 bro what
He steals or at least stole from the dead though. When he says 'the age old question that you could write a cheque and take their physical money' was random af and a confession, Theo calls him out on it at the end.
Theo was just naming off everything he had on him
he was lowkey paraniod man , admitting everything.
@@JonnyUnderrated people forget theo is 40 dam near 50, he was making sure just incase the lord took him in early, that he take everything he had on him with him
He's off the yak but yak is never off the mind
@@vansdan. he's in love with the coco
My brightness is all the way down and I thought you were laying in a casket in your profile pic 😲lol
Man, Theo is nuts, he straight up asked him if he stole anything lol
it was so confident too. haha
U know he was damn sure ready to take that million dollars outta there and replace it with a check lol
You got to admire his straight forewardness lol we were all wondering if the guy stole, but who would actually ask him? Lol
You can tell the mortician has a good sense of humor.
I think he asked implicitly at 2:48 and the guy didn't pick up on it so he just asked again, explicitly
Honestly these podcasts are great I love "regular" people. Theo sees the interesting side to everyone.
There aint no TSA when you're flyin up to heaven
fucking golden
I read This as he Said IT LOL
@@ivanravenski same
Bless god
My little brother died and I was too hurt to put anything. Props to the families for healing their way
How'd he die?
@@absolutebackfire191 ffs
@ my brothers funeral I just so happened to be wearing two matching rings, I didn't really think about it or notice until I was viewing him saying my last goodbyes.. anyway his fingers were far thicker than mine lol so I just placed one of the rings in his hand.
@@absolutebackfire191none of your business
Hope you are doing well
I’ve had someone request to be buried with their shotgun.
Theo: Amen
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
On Fallout New Vegas, you can "Borrow" a .357 Revolver called Lucky from a -6 foot tall person.
“Died during a wild leaf blowing accident” lmao
"dangerous leaf blowing or something ya know"
no, i dont know.
My friend Johannes died leaf blowing. Aug 23 15 rip Johannes
His death was avoidable leaf blower death
The watch that guys wearing was supposed to have been buried
My father died in 2002 when I was 15. He is a VET and ex CIA. He was my baseball coach for a lot of years. I put my baseball glove in there and my whole team signed a baseball and put it in their....RIP dad I love you. Struggle is real VON. I have ptsd because of it. Its really hard. Thank you for your videos you help me a lot.
Sorry for your loss man hope you’re well
My great grandpa was buried with a bottle of super glue, ziploc bags, a roll of duct tape and some JB weld, my man was more than prepared
Sounds like he might not have been dead if you had to duct tape him
@@nolongerjuicyboiz4413 😂😂😂
Who's your great grandpa, Macgyver?
Sounds like he was kidnapped
@@launchpadmcquack9305 Basically yeah! One of those guys who didn’t want to send anything to a repair shop or get anything new. If he couldn’t fix it or keep it going he didn’t want any part of it!
Bury me with a damn Honda Civic
Only the real ones ain’t walking
My 92 Miata is almost certainly going to be my casket. And not just because it's in my will.
Helll yeahhh we gotta burry u in the loud ass civic
Chin?
Dude! In South Africa we've had that. Guy was buried IN his Mercedes. Body was propped up in the driver's seat with his hands on the wheel.
th-cam.com/video/Lz_vGjHsOts/w-d-xo.html
“A couple starbursts or something”
The hood came out in Theo!
Haha, I’m rolling off top!
That joke about writing a check went over everyone's head I think. Hes actually thought about that stuff lol.
"there's no tsa when you're flying up to heaven"
fucking god tier quote
“You ever stole anything before”😂😂😂😂
Quite a few years ago, my circle of friends (being DBZ fans) we distributed a collection of dragon balls amongst ourselves. With the metaphor that whomever of us goes first, we'd collect the dragon balls and wish for them back. Now, we're not under the fact that that would ever work, but the sentiment is nice. And unfortunately last year the first of us passed, and we couldn't collect the dragon balls because some were lost. We buried with him the ones we could find. And redistributed a new set amongst afterwards.
I never knew anyone who bowled with an 8 ball. That would be pretty difficult to knock down those pins with such a tiny ball.
Not if you a badass
There's no tsa at the bowling alley know what I'm sayin.
@@Sjcstro84 no, I don't know what you're sayin. Know what I'm sayin?! Jk man, but really I don't know what tsa has to do with this other than narcotics, which they aren't even good at finding. I've gone through many tsa screenings with contraband that they would've considered illegitimate( Fleshlights, nerf guns, confetti, etc).
@@Caniboss1 Why are you flying in an airplane with *any* of those things?
@@somethingsomethingusername802 I'm not
This is what I imagine a mortician would talk and act😂
Me and the homies have a pact that who ever dies first, the others have to do a line off the casket, out of respect
Friend goals
But what if they are 2 months clean??
@@scrappyhustler7467 their friend is dead bro, they can show a little respect ; )
@@scrappyhustler7467 even if they was 50 years clean pacts like this one don't get broken if they where true best friends
Sitting up for days swearing eternal allegiance to each other,only to have the binge come crashing down and you realise you wouldn't cross the street to piss on his head if it was on fire
“I’m talking that cocaine baby”😂😂
“There’s no TSA when you’re flying up to heaven” i feel this .
Theo is a fool man 🤣🤣 he said "you ever steal anything?"
“An 8 ball and I ain’t talking bowling”
He's got that Southern funk, most people get twisted. He's the guy down the street for me. I'm glad to see the love.
When my grandpa pasted I put a skittle in his pocket, think I was 6
It’s still in his pocket on his skeleton
@@rileyfalala3103 but what if it's not there and hes not a skeleton!!!
Are you 7?
@@SP-vo7ty why, because misspelled passed? shut up
@Rocket Pliance I highly doubt you're a pleasant person
This guy is out of breath sitting jesus
Homeboi gonna provide his business with another customer know what im sayin
All the fat actually pushes up on the fat peoples lungs when they’re sitting which can make them get out of breath. Ironic considering it’s hard for fat people to stand too lmao
We were still getting hospital bills from the VA after my Daddy passed. It hurt us terribly. My mom wrote “forward to Heaven” and sent them back.
Also my cousin was the biggest pot head where we live. After losing him, we had his friends come in and put buds and joints in his pockets and rolled up in his sleeve. Someone called the damn cops about people bringing drugs in. Made me so mad. Not like they’re doing a drug deal, sending him with something he loved. I’m glad that there was some that the cops didn’t find and he was able to be sent with a little bit. Love and miss you, Billy
they searched his body?
@@KakashiHatake-sv1vbcavity search
They took the ones that weren’t hidden very well. Pretty easy to spot.
Always some self righteous nut got to screw things up. Probably some relative who didn't want the truth to be told.
“Here lies Fred: he died as he lived… doin a dangerous leaf blowin”
Well, at least he passed away doing what he loved most.
I buried my 25 year old brother back in April I put a quarter bag of sticky icky in his front pocket. I love you Levi you are still my best friend.
8ball... bowling..... I think billiards or pool may be what Theo was thinking
I mean it's basically bowling with a stick
All the crazy shit he says and your worried about that , not some of his friends and their choices??
@@brainattackmaniack- not evaluating the guys whole life. Just an observation from a short clip
Buddy looks like he owns the track and his horse is up against the little girls under-dog horse in the big race at the state fair next week
Francisco Antonio wHaT
Best fucking comment i have seen.. if i close my eyes i can see that imaginery movie in my mind
Dude sounds like he's half dead himself with the breathing.
“If somebody wants to be buried with an 8 ball, and I’m not talkin bowling”
Bowling, Pool, close enough 🤣
Mortician looking like he’s been eating the toes off each body before they go down
Can’t resist them toeter tots
A funeral director once called the cops on me & my friends for putting weed into our buddies casket🤦 thankfully though!! The cops didn't bother us or even care about it. Nobody was smoking at the service & nobody was selling it and they weren't gonna do paperwork for a dead guy "in possession" of some weed 😂
your friend would have died laughing if he was alive
@@ninoalvarez7604 I like to think so ! Even the cops thought it was pretty funny.
You're an amazing person brother. I'd be stoked to have a friend like you
That funeral director sounds like a bit of a stuck up ass. What a thing to do. Just let the loved ones and friends do what they feel at the funeral ffs.
My best friend was a heroin addict for 13 years. He requested to be buried with his favorite syringe. (3ml 23 gauge). I told the funeral director and he didn’t care at all😂
I used to work at a cemetery and I’ve seen people leave toys, alcohol, weed, powdery substances I can only assume was coke or meth, tobacco and all sorts of different shit. I’ve seen a man pull out a little .25cal handgun put a foot on the dirt pile and give a gangsta gun salute. I’ve seen people sit on graves and get high, sleep, and read books. It’s amazing what you see when working with the dead.
We are truly ritual and mystic beings.
I used to find mad drugs in this graveyard.... crack, booze, Suboxone, weed
My family friend died from s**cide. Not only was his casket this absolutely gorgeous hand carved piece of art, but he had on the most beautiful headdress with stunning beadwork made from turquoise and all kinds of other stones. He had on a traditional chest piece made from bones and beads, and a full buckskin outfit. He looked absolutely regal. Saddest funeral I've ever been to, though. His wife collapsed by his casket and started screaming at him for leaving her behind. He had such awesome kids, too. I don't judge anyone for doing it, I don't like when people call it a "selfish act" because they never truly understand what's going on in someone's head. But I am a Christian and I do know it's against God's law. Plus, you leave behind you a wake of people who think it's their fault or that they didn't do enough for you in life. Your existence means so much more, to so many more than you could even imagine. But when you're struggling, it's hard or impossible to see it.
"an 8ball I aint talking bowling", lmao he meant pool or billiards...im dying lol
Lol he brought a mortician on the show. 👏
My aunt passed away earlier this year, and we all knew she really loved butterflies, so every member of the family took a big butterfly sticker and stuck it on the casket. It was beautiful
Lmao my dad said, when he dies, just throw his ass in the dumpster!! 😂💀💀
A friend of mine died from a heroine OD and someone thought it was a great idea to put some crack , weed, and lighter ..... everyone was shortly escorted out
Wow smoking crack in heaven 😅🤣
I like to imagine it was a good friend deciding the put down the rocks after the rude awakening of a buddie's death
His breathes are a nice soundtrack to this podcast
Finally a person to step toe to toe with Theo lol. This guys awesome
This dude seems so chill.. and the guest too.
Theo hit that boy up with the Forks!
That funeral director looks like he's bout to have a heart attack.
Only one more cheesburger Away from that
Cheeseburger******
@@tylerburdett1728 extra bacon 🥓🥓, lol
he looks like he's off the percs
My man built like Chris Farley.
I’m definitely gunna sneak a joint in my grand pop’s casket 😌❤️ bless that won’t happen for a while
Girlfriend it goes by so fast. Don't miss a beat with your grandparents. I remember when it seemed a lifetime away. My grandparents have been gone 10 years now.😭
realest quote ever "Their ain't no TSA when you going to heaven" hahahaha
I could listen to this guy all day
Hes such a good mortician his customers are DYING to be buried there. Heha he ha he
A dangerous leaf blowing accident lmao. He says the darndest things
Theo Von is a genius at selecting guests 😂
"what about an 8ball? and im not talkin about bowlin"
I put a nice big purple bud in my dad's pocket when he passed away. It stunk up the whole Funeral Home lol. Still to this day it's in his pocket Six Feet Under. Rest in peace pops
Rest In Purple Peace ✌️
shouldve sprinkled a little keef at the end.
@@jerrynadler2883 it was a nice big three G blackberry Purp bud lol. The most purple but I've ever seen in my life. I got an ounce of it right before my dad's funeral and put up nice big nugget in his pocket
Theo’s thoughts are fucking wild. I could hang with this guy and just hear what goes on in his head, and he’d tell you... not even he knows!
“No TSA when you’re flying up to heaven” 😂 this guy is my favorite now
I put a bong in my friends casket in high school.
At that funeral home I work at we accidentally forgot to take off a grandmas diamond engagement ring and buried her with it. We offered to disinter her and get it back but the family didn’t want to disturb her. The ring was was a family heirloom.
Yeah people get really serious about where dead bodies are but the dead never ask no damn questions
I always said to my mom that if my grandfather dies, someone should keep the watch. My stupid cousin took that 1950s omega to a jeweller and asked for a BATTERY REPLACEMENT. They then claimed the mainspring was broken, easy fix for a watchmaker. They ended up burying him with a 1950s omega mechanical watch. When he got it they were of a higher prestige than a rolex. It was his watch that he had on every day for 50 years so I suppose it was fitting. But as a watch enthusiast, it would've been nice if we kept it because it's a real vintage piece.
Hit a touchdown bowling with an 8 ball once.
My best friend passed away when I was 11 years old, he was hit by a car. At his funeral his dad put his guitar in the casket with him.
@Eric P who said it was weird? Literally just made a statement.
@DW DW usually talking about death isn't funny.
@DW DW he wasn't trying to be funny lol not everybody on TH-cam comments trying to be a comedian
Old saying about heaven: “they’ve got one hell of a band up there.”
One of my ex bosses when he passed away had his Driver (golf club ) buried with him. He was also a MAJOR University of Michigan fan, so he of course had his hat, sweat shirt and football with him so he was always ready for a game when watching down from above!
This discussion reminds me of hanging out in the high school I went to in Louisiana. These two are 100 percent boot staters.
That guy is a hotdog away from a heart attack 😂 bless you, sir, get on that treadmill!
“..if someone died during a.. dangerous.. leaf blowing, ya know?”
Bruh 😂
“A chainsaw, leaf blower or a sander!”😂🤣
“An eight ball and I ain’t talking bowling” is insane 😂😂
“8 ball….And I’m not talkin bowling” lmao
Bury me with a steering wheel. Gonna drive this baby to the nether realms.
“8 ball and im not talking abt bowling”
Theo talking cochise, bowling with billiard balls, dangerous leaf blowing 😳......his brain is cooked..... lol
0:30 Theo threw up the Fork . They don let the GD'S in the door
Brooo the amen he throws around kills me
"You know" omfg I was dying everytime I heard it
I do love this gentleman, he's great! Interesting, informative, & good sense of humor without being disrespectful to deceased. But for followup still pleading for Caitlin Doughty :-)
Omg I was literally thinking this same thing. She’s my favorite!!!
Caitlin would be good .
This guy steals everything
I've had that "liquid death" water in a can before. Weirdest thing having water out of a can
Reminded me when I was young and didn't want to wash a cup so I filled up a can of soda instead
We buried my mom in her favorite swimsuit, with sweatpants, and fuzzy socks. It was underneath a nice cardigan and we only had the top half of the casket open, so you couldn’t even tell. But she would have absolutely loved it.
Mortician looks like he’s been going to every family grieving dinner just for the catering food
These guys are on the same wavelength
When Dad passed away in 1993 we put a golf club and a plumb bob in his casket. He was a land surveyor and loved his golf.
My dad died 3 months before his first grandchild was born. I was pregnant with my son, we knew it was a boy & that he'd be named after my pops. He desperately wanted to live long enough to hold him. We were denied that luxury. One of a few things we put in his casket was my ultrasound pictures. That baby is now 20yrs old & I love that he shares his name with his Papa.
I've never heard people say "You know" to each other more than in this clip before, you know.
Haha there’s no TSA flying up to heaven. Shit like that is why Theo is one of my favourite comedians.
"...and I'm not talking bowling..."
Damn he's good 😂
Theo’s heavy breathing when he mentions cigarettes lol
"Have you... Ever stolen anything from anybody?"
"Naw I didn't think you had, just had to ask..."
This guy is hilarious 😂 Great guest Theo.
“There’s no TSA when you’re flyin’ up to heaven” Amen.
everything theo says is fucking iconic dude is legendary
Theo man...i loved you on the challenge back in the day but i just didn't know how damn funny you were until these last few years 😂😂😂
1:04 “What about an 8ball? And I ain’t talking bowling, baby!”