I'm so shocked to hear that you tend to be late. I assumed that you would be the type of person to always be there earlier ahah! It's really nice to discover different parts of you that we can't especially guess by watching your videos! Have a nice week Ruby xx
@@RubyGranger8 I've been following your videos for a while now (since I was an undergrad at a US university. I am currently getting a Doctor of Jurisprudence) and was also shocked to hear you're frequently late! I totally get it, though. I am such a Type A person academically but cannot be on time for ANYTHING!
I needed you in my life 20 years ago! I’m 36, a mum, with my Master’s degree being 14 years old. However, I relate to you so much and younger me would’ve found so much peace watching someone like you. Keep being you, you’re such a wise person. x
Same here, I'm 36 and a mum. I love Ruby's videos and relate to her, I think watching her videos would have helped me a lot when I was younger as well. My masters is still to come I hope. 😅
Y'all are so cute I'm gonna cry. I'm currently a 20 year old who is the first of my family to go into uni. I'm so proud of myself as it took two years in college to finally get to the place I wanted to go to and I got a lot of support from god.
As a mostly introverted person I felt this in my soul. Why is it “sad” or “cringey” to have just a few close friends? Even the times I do hang out with large groups I feel emotionally winded and get talked over the whole time because I’m quiet and just tend to say something weird that I don’t realize is weird until I say it. For example there was a time I was in class and everyone was talking about astrology and I said “I heard mercury was in gatorade” as a joke but they all thought that I was just confusing the planet with the element. Apparently I’m so deadpan when I make a joke people think I’m actually stupid. 😂
Some of them are a bit rude some of them aren't rude at all. None of them are super offensive. No need to be so butthurt about someone thinking you don't have many friends when you are obviously an introvert or that you don't read as much as 5 books a day as is shown in the readathon videos.
@@sarahishereforyourkidney Okay, great that you feel that way but what is considered rude and what's not differs from person to person and from culture to culture. I see no reason to call me 'butthurt' and undermine my feelings just because you have a different threshold for what you consider rude.
@@frogheart8440 you're right. This is just your personal opinion vs mine. But I can call you butthurt anyway because I think that and you can call me a sociopath but you won't because you're the good guy here and that would be rude. So yeah. I stand by what I said you're too sensitive (in my opinion) and I don't care about how much more butthurt you get from me telling that to you. Go on Saint Mary spread your love and empathy. Not everyone in life is gonna be super nice to you. If you start moaning over every little word someone calls you you'll have a hard time finding happiness. maybe I wrote all this becauee of my own unresolved issues and maybe I wrote this just because I wanted to upset you. Maybe I did this as a tough love thing. Come up with your own theory. Maybe I'm just a bad person. I am not quite sure myself anymore. It doesn't help that it's past 2 am. Well merry Christmas (or whatever you celebrate) to you dear crybaby stranger.
@@frogheart8440 okay I see I really managed to put a full on existential crisis into that reply. What I really meant is that I just disagreed with your original statement and had to phrase my words in a way that will actually give you a reason to be as hurt as you seemed from stranger doing what she asked them to do. It seemed to have worked but I managed to catch myself in it too. Well then... Just enjoy the Holidays.
Well said on the extroverted focus of society especially these days. Feeling like I don't have "enough" friends is something I still struggle with and I am inspired by your recognition that there is no problem with being an introvert in an extrovert's world.
Omg. I love how positively and honestly you have responded to so many of these assumptions. You have tried to look at it from another person's shoes, to see what it could possibly mean, the actual curiosity behind the questions. You could have so easily have gotten offended. I mean, I did at a couple of them, on your behalf, until I understood what they actually meant. This was a lovely video.
I really appreciate how much you value your privilege, and recognise how your family’s financial situation has positively impacted you academically. As someone who didn’t get a very good secondary education, I hope I am in a strong enough financial position to send my future children to a good quality school.
Believing that your family is middle class and financially 'okay;' while also living in a mansion and attending 14 years of private education is not recognising ones privilege.
I think making the studying aesthetic and romanticise life as long as it's done in the right way can help with motivation. Without your videos, lighting candles, doing digital detoxes, wearing nice outfits, turning on a water diffuser with some essential oil and listening to movie scores/lofi/meditation music, my motivation would plummet real fast! Maybe I've just gotten used to it but before when I did nothing of this I just never got in the mood to focus. My appreciation for nature would probably be different too if not for your aesthetic videos!
Thanks for raising awareness about adult bullying. As a victim its the most shameful feeling and I don't think people realise just how impactful it is on someone's wellbeing. Mentally and physically it can destroy you.
I think who is the person isn't victim is just bad. I can't imagine he or she can't realise how does it feel being bullied. He or she is just a bad person and he or she just liked it. I told this to you at 18, being bullied from even some of my teachers and most of my classmates. I hope I you can understand what did I mean cause English isn't my first language.
I’m so sorry that you’ve had to go through this. I’ve never experienced adult bullying, but can’t imagine how tough it is because you don’t have all of the provisions available to you when you’re young x
I’m so sorry to hear you experienced this. My mum experienced adult bullying and it was the most heartbreaking thing seeing her come home from work each day looking so defeated. Hope you’re doing okay now! Sending hugs 🤗
Hi Ruby! I was fascinated to learn that you are one of the first in your family to attend university. You come across as being knowledgeable of the "hidden curriculum" of higher education (the "how to's" of academia- students know from experience or because someone told them). I would love to watch a future video about how you gained this knowledge for yourself.
Why is having a small friend group a bad thing? I used to be in a big friend group and it was the worst, I am so much happier now I have a small group of true friends I can rely on
ruby dont change, u r totally fine..i feel so related..why nobody doesnt understand that its normal and fine not being interessted in dating and its also fine to have 1-2 main friends and thats it...actually, i adore u exactly for these traits
Hi Ruby ! Just wanted to say that I like that kind of videos. You're honest about every question, without filter. I also agree with you about that "extrovert society" : it makes me upset that people believe that if you're an introvert, or don't have much friends you're not a fun person. That's totally false. People have to think about who will be there for them when they need them to be... And they'll hopefully stop assuming about other's sociability.
"You never have those depression, non-activity, unproductive day." Can people please stop using depression as just a feeling like sadness when it is actually a real serious mental illness. Comments like this using the word depression is so annoying. You should make a video about cyber bullying which happens even more than bullying in real life and is very serious and dangerous.
@Chiro치로 "Depression differs from sadness. The feelings you have will affect all aspects of your life. It may be hard or even impossible to find enjoyment in anything, including activities and people you used to enjoy. Depression is a mental illness, not an emotion." So no its not a emotion.
@Chiro치로 A simple research shows you that depression is not a emotion. Sadness is a emotion, depression isn't. I copied and pasted for you above from Healthline, but a simple search will show you the same result from Mayo Clinic as well as others. Yes you can feel anxious without having a anxiety disorder, but you can't feel "depressed" without having depression.
@@pamrizzo6663 That just isn't true. Depressed mood can be a symptom of major depressive disorder, but it doesn't mean that people without major depressive disorder can't experience depression. It's like saying you can't have a runny nose without having a cold. When it's outside the context of a mental disorder, depression is usually less severe and/or shorter-lived (and often more linked to an identifiable cause, like suffering a loss or having a bad week) but it is still real. I appreciate how thoughtful you're being about language and how caring you are towards people who experience depressive disorders. And making light of depression can definitely be problematic. But depression can and does happen outside of clinical disorders.
I'm older and I have been bullied at work. I had no self worth. I was told that if I left the company I would lose all my credibility. That it was the only job I could do but I still wasn't good enough. And when I had good ideas my manager took the credit for them. Don't stay in an environment like that. You deserve better
I found this video to be very fascinating and fun to watch. I also wish that people would normalize having very little if any friends at all. Throughout my life, I have hardly had any friends, and for the past few years, I have had none at all. It's not that I am not interested, but rather, I have always found it difficult to find good and kindhearted people with similar interests that truly care about friendship and not just about bolstering the number of friends in their own friendship groups.
I feel you. I have always tried but I find most people find me quirky. They don't dislike me. They find me odd. I do have some very good friends but unfortunately based on work schedules I do not see my few friends enough.
I wonder if you are maybe aromantic (and asexual)? I have kind of gotten that impression and wanted to suggest this for a while, because maybe you might find it helpful
girl i relate so much on the dating front!! i’m just not interested. in the same way that i’m not interested in playing football; i haven’t really tried it, but i know it’s not for me. no reason especially, i just don’t relate to the desire for a relationship that my friends have. and that’s okay!
Awww, we're so similar in so many ways. Short attention span when it comes to movies, not caring a lot about relationships, even the speedy walk thing. The only thing I'm lacking is getting my shit together :D
Wow, the part about worrying that the number of friends isn’t enough is so relatable for me. Every year unconstitutionally I would count and feel that I’m not good enough because I don’t have 10 or even 5 best friends. It’s so ok to have one or two if that’s what’s good for you
I feel you but its also more about quality rather than quantity cuz at the end of the day its about the ones that r real and genuine and will have your back and not stab you in the back. Most people are not our friends unfortunately, but there are people specifically chosen for us it feels like, cuz i have also a few very good friends, which i truly value and appreciate! They have helped me in every way, most people dont care but the ones that do and go out of their way to help you become a better version of you, those are the ones worth keeping close. Not everyone deserves access to us anyway cuz our energy is precious and not everyone is worthy of receiving it cuz they cant appreciate nor handle it:)
How refreshing and very honest. Virginia Woolf wrote "A Room of One's Own." in 1929. I think today it might be entitled "A Space of One's Own." Despite all the leisure time available, more than ever we are under pressure to socialize offline and online. Your approach to this is commendable. I think your parents have done an excellent job! You are shy but confident enough to demand as Greta Garbo said in The Grand Hotel "I want to be alone." Keep on being yourself Ruby.
I feel like a lot of creators get really defensive when responding to assumptions, to the point where that’s what I expect of these videos… but Ruby is just so honest and genuine. I love to see it!
*5 things to quit for all people:* *1. Caring about what others think* *2. Not believing in yourself* *3. Not prioritizing your health* *4. Wasting your precious time* *5. Chasing meaningless relationships*
your response to the dating assumption reminded me of the book "loveless" by alice oseman. it's a great book about an aroace girl discovering herself during university and she has this amazing group of friends and it's just perfect. edit: what you said about being introverted and that the world designed for extroverts is rlly something the main character of the book talks a lot about. READ IT!!
I'm aroace :) We should not assume that Ruby is but growing up I did not even know aroace was a thing. I didn't even know being ace was a thing. Then I realized after I found out I was ace..."oh, you are aro too." XD
@@kpaxian6044 i know i should assume but i was hesitating to comment this but i felt like maybe if she is in anyway deep down questioning or confused, she would have this recommendation. was that a bad thing? i can delete the comment /gen :)) also,, ahhahahahahaha i am ace too and it was similar for me. I grew up thinking everyone was like me and i didn't know what asexuality was so when i was 17 i was reading about it and i was just like: oh.. i relate to this way too much
@@eduardaaraujo9039 no...not a bad idea to recommend at all. :) Your suggestion was lovely. Whether Ruby is or is not ace or anything else I am sure she would be interested in the book as I am interested in other orientations too. Your recommendation came from a kind and lovely place. ♡♡
Your family really shows that 'being academic' isn't necessarily related to 'being able to educate their children'. Even though your parents and grandparents left school early, they obviously love life and their family -- the activities you do together, with reading and painting are so important and insightful.
Your videos are always so warm and lovely and they never fail to remind me why I love learning so much. Even when I'm studying something I find difficult, I remind myself that it's okay to struggle and that in the end it will be okay if I just work hard and believe in myself. You're one of the kindest people here and I really am grateful for your videos. Take care, Ruby! 🧡
Out of curiosity, do you find yourself relating to aro/ace labels at all? I’m just wondering since your descriptions relating to relationships always seem to fit the bill quite well, yet I’ve never heard you use the terms specifically. No pressure to fix labels to yourself of course (in a public setting especially if you’re not comfortable to do so) and they’re purely descriptive anyway, it was just very eye opening for me personally when I found them at 19 and suddenly realized I had a whole community of similar people around me.
I've been thinking the same. My perception of the world in general changed a lot after discovering I am aroace and it had helped me a lot to understand myself better, so I thing it is worth mentioning it just in case Ruby (or others) could know about these orientations and (if it is the case), find if they identify with them of not. I didn't now aromatisism was a thing until I read about it in a TH-cam comment (it is not so commonly heard online as other orientations), so I get it is not on most people's radar.
Again, as you said, it is not about "imposing' labels in someone. If you don't want to date right now it doesn't necessarily mean you are aro, but learning about the therm could be really useful in understanding yourself and others.
@@brookjewell7489 Any word is just a made-up shortcut to convey something. You could say "pot with wax and a wick that that can be lit into a small, controlled flame"... Or you could just say "candle". The point being that the purpose of labels is not to confine you and put you into some sort of inescapable box, but rather serve to describe your experience to others in a concise way. I'm not saying that you have to define yourself - that's up to you entirely and not my place. But your phrasing of "some made up word" comes off a bit belittling towards all those who have found a huge amount of comfort in the knowledge that they're not alone.
There’s something so calming about you and your content. I’ve been a subscriber for a while now and usually don’t comment on videos but you seem like such a kind and positive person and that’s like a breath of fresh air on social media nowadays. I bet many people find peace and comfort in your channel, keep being yourself, we need more people like you
My dad always told me that “quality over quantity” is always best. That includes friends 💖 I’d much rather have a few true friends than a lot of people I only half know (and trust).
Ruby, Great video! You seem like such a kind person. You are always so mindful and sensitive towards other people. Not many people would be able to answer to such assumptions about themselves with this much calm and poise. I noticed you took down your most recent video about bullying. I assume that it was in response to the many comments and criticism you received on it. I read through most of it and although I think some of that criticism was valid, I was upset that many people completely dismissed your experience with bullying and were saying you were never really bullied (and especially disgusted by one comment related to your book somehow implying that if you were like Erimentha then you deserved to be bullied?). Even if you were not bullied physically (I don’t know if you were but even if you were not), I assume that being constantly harassed just for being who you are can greatly impact your self-esteem and lead you to feel extremely sad, anxious and lonely. Having your experience invalidated because people have it worse than you do will most likely only amplify those feelings. Although it’s important to recognized our privileges and what other people might be going through, the whole point of doing this is to help make the world a better place, which you can’t really do while being sad, anxious and lonely. I’ve never posted a comment on TH-cam before but I’ve been bothered by this over the last few days and really wanted to point this out. Anyway, I think you are doing a great job with your channel. I relate to you a lot and I really enjoy watching your videos (especially the more chatty ones like this one). I hope you have wonderful day! 😊
Marie-Sophie (such a lovely name by the way), I cannot tell you how much this means to me. Thank you. The criticism on the video was totally valid (hence why I took it down), but that was the comment I struggled most with. My bullying wasn't anywhere near as bad as a lot of people's, and I know I was lucky that it wasn't worth, but it took me years to admit to myself that I even was bullied -- and quite a lot of therapy haha! So I appreciate you saying this. I also feel honoured that this is your first TH-cam comment 💕
@@RubyGranger8 I’m so glad you saw this and it helped you in some way. Your reply means a lot to me also. Keep being the awesome person that you are! Lots of love, Marie-Sophie.
Movie you miight like (based on an assumption lol) : The sunlit night. It's set in Norway, it has lots of playful references to art and artistry, it's gentle and funny and sad.
Okay but why are some of these so mean? You do a lovely job of responding to these in a positive manner, but I'm so sorry that you had to deal with this negativity. Props to you for shining a positive light on this negativity!
Quality rather than quantity, with regards to friendships. That's something we often learn as we grow older. Good on you for being your authentic self.
Thank you for talking about it being okay with having only a few friends. I started uni in person this fall and I’ve felt a lot of pressure to make a bunch of new friends and always feel bad about it because I’m just not that kind of person. But you’re right, it shouldn’t be so stigmatized and I shouldn’t feel pressure to change myself.
I find the assumptions about dating very interesting as they assume that dating is only valid if it is with someone else. I disagree with this premise, I think solo dating is so so valid and actually very beneficial. I am essentially dating myself, it doesn't mean I hold myself higher than others (because I most definitely do not, I am far from perfect) - it simply means this is my way of taking care of myself and the way I enjoy life the most. Everyone is different, I think if you enjoy dating other people - go for it!!! And if you know you are not much of a dating other people person - then don't feel pressured to do so (there is no point in doing something just because it's the norm). If you feel you are not a dating other people person, it does not mean you are not open to it, it just means you are not actively doing it as it's not something that you personally get much enjoyment from. For me, I believe that it will happen if it happens and if it doesn't it doesn't. Right now I'm just doing what I get the most joy out of and that is going on dates by myself. I am open to dating other people in the future if in the future, this is something I truly want to do and not just something I am doing because everyone else is.
Wow, I love this mindset Alice! I hope people read this! I love the idea of “dating yourself” and focusing on yourself (in a non-selfish way). We shouldn’t be sucked into adhering to the accepted social standard 🤍
Wow, I love this mindset Alice! I hope people read this! I love the idea of “dating yourself” and focusing on yourself (in a non-selfish way). We shouldn’t be sucked into adhering to the accepted social standard 🤍
According to one statistic published a few years ago, the number of people who don't have their first romantic relationship until reaching their mid-20s has risen significantly in the last quarter of a century. Even if that were not so, there is no race to find oneself a lover, though society seems to think otherwise. There is of course the argument made that women are up against the biological clock with regard to having children - pregnancy and birth, certainly for the first time, are less risky whilst you're young - but that argument is perhaps better not linked to the broader issue of relationships. After all, having children may not be on your mind when encountering someone you think you might want to spend time with and become very close to. And, assuming you even want children, you will want to have them with the right person; for various reasons, such a person may not be your first date, and indeed it's possible to have a number of failed relationships that may even put you off the idea of having any more - only then to find that special someone and have your mind totally changed. So, if you are single and content to be, don't feel shame and don't allow others to make you feel ashamed. It is for each of us to discover ourselves as we go through life, and relationships are a part of that voyage of discovery.
If you're not cringing at your past self, you're not growing. sounds like one of these Instagram bs inspirational stories but cmon, this one at least has some truth to it
Oh my God, Ruby, you've opened my eyes!!! I walk really really fast and sometimes it annoys me so much, because this makes me even more tired. I can't do anything about it, it happens unconsciously and often my walking does not correlate with the walking of my companions. But I've never drawn a line between walking fast and being late - and I'm almost always late, too! Sometimes it happens that I prepare a lot in advance, but I still come late. It's definitely a trick of the universe 😅
Ruby, you're such an amazing person. I can watch you all day! Your kindness , humility and intellect are something I look up to. Thankyou Ruby for sharing your life w us❤
wait whaat "you just focus on aesthetic not on actual studies" - i do not think that this one is true, i am watching your videos since 6 years (i guess from the beginning) & i tried watching other studytubers but unfortunately i couldn´t find many studytuber that are really into studying. i often think that many other that are recommended to me (for example with the video title "study day" ) are mostly into showing what they eat, drink, how they workout and aesthetic note taking (nothing false with aesthetics, i love it!) but the focus on aesthetics without much content make them seem rather superficial and that is NOT the case in your videos i rather found that you are the only one who is more into actually learning the stuff & studying. that does not mean your videos aren´t aesthetically pleasant, they are !! but the focus in your videos is more on the studying than on the "aesthetics" i hope i explained it well, love your videos!!
Ahh Sasha! That truly means so much to hear! I absolutely LOVE learning and studies and I’m so pleased that you can tell from my videos 🥺I have had a few people comment on how I prioritise aesthetics over studying and I must say I don’t quite understand it haha! xxx
@@RubyGranger8 yes, i can tell that! maybe the people commenting on that just saw one or two of your videos 🤷🏻♀️ p.s. thank you for answering Ruby, i read your answer this morning & it made my day! )) xx
I just have to share this story with you cause you’ve helped me so much while I was going through bullying: I was bullied a lot when I was about 14-15 by the girls in my class, a lot o slut shamming happened and other stuff. I’m 23 now and been in therapy ever since the bullying started and have come to terms with it (you could say I’m at peace). I’ve since became a financial planner and this week one of my worst bullies came to me for advice. I’m happy to say that I was able to be the “better” person and treated her as any other client and it made me feel so good to put that behind me, even though there was a lot of pain attached to the situation. Anyways, thanks for being this amazing human being and sorry for any bad English (English is not my first language)
I was diagnosed with avoidance personality disorder yesterday and OCD. I spend all my time alone in my room at uni, I thought it was just social anxiety but its actually avoidance personality disorder, which is 50% genetic and 50% triggered by bullying/abuse in childhood , People at uni just assume I'm ''weird'' or rude/stuck up.
I have very few friends and as I've grown older, I've grown quite content with it. Trying to gain friends and please people is exhausting. Socializing is exhausting. It's so much easier to have a few close people and screw all the rest. ;)
Ah... really appreciate that all ad revenue from this video will be donated to Ditch the Label - an anti-discrimination children's charity in the UK (in the description)
Btw. My parents and grandparents never went to the university as well. I was the first one in my family who went to the university too. Sometimes it was very frustrating, because they have no idea until this day, what it's like studying at the university and how hard it can be and how much work you must do.
A very well done video Ruby. Your content is always fantastic. Keep up the good work young lady and thank you very much for what you do. Take care and have a productive week 😀
Would you ever consider filming those unproductive days? I just feel it's more realistic and more relatable to watch (though I do come to your vids for motivation LOL)
As an ambivert, I've realised a couple of things. Society is designed for extroverted people, but that's not a bad thing. Even though it seems like there are a lot of introverts, the truth is that being an introvert is the exception not the rule, and that's also not a bad thing. Humans are extremely social beings in general, and it makes sense for sociability to be such a core aspect of society, because society literally depends on socialisation to exist.
Hello, Ruby! I love your planners! I invested in all of them which are available as digital products. I use them all the time and my students like them too. Thank you for your amazing work. Pumpkin productivity is fabulous! ❤📚
Thank you for raising awareness against bullying! Even though these assumption videos can be quite harmless, I kind of felt like some of these assumptions were very direct and almost mean (i.e. the one about you pretending to read more than you do, or the one about you caring more about aesthetics than studying, or the one about you ONLY having one friend). I can only imagine how hard and possibly hurtful it must be to go through these assumptions about yourself and openly address them in a video. I also had the feeling that you were not entirely comfortable in this video, so I just wanted to say, that I really love your videos, I can tell you are deeply interested in your studies (I am studying English literature as well) and I hope none of these superficial assumptions were hurtful to you!
Unfortunately, most people consider it to be "bullying" only when the object is an LGBTQ person. Otherwise, it's just "growing pains", or even the fault of the victim for failing to ingratiate themselves with the bully. This leave offenders completely free to target people just because they are short, odd looking, clumsy, nerdy, or poor.
It got taken down because, kind of ironically considering it was an anti-bullying video, there were lots of criticism of it, and a lot of people had complaints- I don’t know if its just a temporary thing while she edits it slightly or if its a permanent thing.
Elizabeth is right, the video was (quite rightfully) criticised and I decided to take it down. I really wanted it to be a helpful video but, since it had the potential for it to not be, I thought it best just to remove it. I know that particularly vulnerable people might be attracted to that video and I would hate for anything to be unhelpful. (in case you're curious about particulars - because I would be!! - I was promoting a stoic model for approaching bullying -- which is the approach I took as a young teenager when getting bullied. It worked for me, but some people pointed out that we can't always control their thoughts & that it was toxic positivity. I retrospectively agreed that this could be toxic) xx
Thank u so much Ruby for posting another video like this ...I really wanted to watch the previous one but u took it down.. I'm sure u know best and we always love u & support u 💚🍀
I’m 43 and 1. I’ve just found your videos. Although I’m not studying, I have just taken on a new role so finding productivity tools and tips etc. But trying to study and research for it in between. 2. You’re amazing. I don’t know how you find the time. 3. What you just said about being extroverted. I’ve always thought this. Why do we celebrate it so much? Who cares? Happiness is the ultimate goal. I have 4 very close friends and obviously my husband and son and that’s all I need in life. Anyway, I’m very much looking forward to bingeing in your videos!
I completely agree with how society constructs you around having loads of friends and being an extrovert, as someone who finds it hard to make friends it’s really just so true to what you are saying and thank you because it makes me feel less alone! ❤️
i recently watched the movie THE NUTCRACKER and i realized that your background music is from there!! love your videos by the way you are so influential to lots of people like me
@@RubyGranger8 i watched the 2011 version with Elle Fanning as Mary. I REALLY enjoyed it! I will check out the clips xx Also just a suggestion could you ask the comments in your videos to do assumptions and questions for Q and A's because i know lots of people don't have Intagram:)
100% agree with how society is built for extroverted people and I'm definitely an introvert and it's really hard because apart from maybe my dad the rest of my family are all extroverts and it's really hard growing up in a family who do love me but find it strange that I dont have many friends and prefer going out just by myself sometimes, like I love going to London by myself and soak up the atmosphere which sometimes you cant really do with a group of people. Like other people have said I find it mental exhausting going out with people and i need a few days to recharge 😊 thank you Ruby you've honsetly helped me out so much these last few years and have helped me learn about myself, I'm in my 30s as well and still learning who I am. 😊
Talking about bullying in adulthood is so important! Thank you for bringing it up. Many times people can have the same mindset as they had in school. I was bullied for my weight in primary school, but I see the same comments people using on social media or when commenting on celebrities. It is awful and damaging. Also, coming from Slovakia (arguably an openly xenophobic and racist country) it took me a long time, large amount of inner dialogues and living for 3 years in another country - UK to realise my ways and thinking patterns are WRONG. Still a long way to go, but awareness is key i think :) Thank you again for this video and all of your content! I love the community here, so also a huge thanks to everyone reading this!
I am annoyed that I still find articles like " Tired of being introverted? here are 5 tips on how to speak up and be more extroverted". I'd like to see an article that says " Too extroverted? here's how to stop screaming and feel fine being alone for more than 5 damn minutes". edit: grammar
Hey Ruby! Your videos are a really great source of inspiration and motivation. You have helped me love studying. Your personality is really charming and I always feel a sense of warmth when I see your videos. You are my role model and thank you so much for helping me like to read more. Thank you again for your efforts and lovely videos!Lots of love😃😃
So you can manage to focus on reading chapters of a book for a long time but not a film? I have the opposite problem because during a film or documentary I can be doing something at the same time on my phone or whatever. How do you manage to read so much without losing interest? Not meant to sound rude I genuinely want to improve my attention span 😂
RUBYYYYY!!!! I FOUND ANOTHER INSTANCE OF SIMILITUDE WITH YOU! I'm too uninterested in dating someone, and like to reason it with yours. God! I am so happy to know that I am not the only weird girl in this world!
It's not like something is over aesthetic and not aesthetic it's just about how you prefer it to be..so you can't judge someone for how there study table is arranged 🙂
Yo no tengo amigos,ni uno.Hace poco elimine Instagram,me canse de tanta "falsedad'.Ahora estoy muy antisociable y estoy muy bien asi.Solo hablo un poco con mi familoa,pero tambien me cuesta.Que se yo,no se como terminara este camino.
I'm so shocked to hear that you tend to be late. I assumed that you would be the type of person to always be there earlier ahah! It's really nice to discover different parts of you that we can't especially guess by watching your videos! Have a nice week Ruby xx
I wish I were better at timing haha but I’m honestly awful! It just shows how misleading social media can be 🙈
@@RubyGranger8 My sister meticulously schedules her day but is always late to things. It must be a thing :D
@@RubyGranger8 same here, the struggle is so real hahaha. And i thought as well that you were really put together😅
@@zohalarbabzada9654 i can relate😂
@@RubyGranger8 I've been following your videos for a while now (since I was an undergrad at a US university. I am currently getting a Doctor of Jurisprudence) and was also shocked to hear you're frequently late! I totally get it, though. I am such a Type A person academically but cannot be on time for ANYTHING!
I needed you in my life 20 years ago! I’m 36, a mum, with my Master’s degree being 14 years old. However, I relate to you so much and younger me would’ve found so much peace watching someone like you. Keep being you, you’re such a wise person. x
Same here, I'm 36 and a mum. I love Ruby's videos and relate to her, I think watching her videos would have helped me a lot when I was younger as well. My masters is still to come I hope. 😅
I know right! Where was she when I was at university? Oh, probably still in elementry.
these are such sweet words! But as a current student in my 20s, I totally agree
I agree! I'm 33 and I would have loved these types of videos when I was younger and in school. Now, I watch them while I work lol.
Y'all are so cute I'm gonna cry. I'm currently a 20 year old who is the first of my family to go into uni. I'm so proud of myself as it took two years in college to finally get to the place I wanted to go to and I got a lot of support from god.
As a mostly introverted person I felt this in my soul. Why is it “sad” or “cringey” to have just a few close friends? Even the times I do hang out with large groups I feel emotionally winded and get talked over the whole time because I’m quiet and just tend to say something weird that I don’t realize is weird until I say it. For example there was a time I was in class and everyone was talking about astrology and I said “I heard mercury was in gatorade” as a joke but they all thought that I was just confusing the planet with the element. Apparently I’m so deadpan when I make a joke people think I’m actually stupid. 😂
Omg this is me 100% lol 😊😊
You're really kind and patient with these 'assumptions'. I feel that they're very rude.
I agree, i have an assumption about her that if said i would be rude, so i keep it to myself. But the assumption is not bad in itself.
Some of them are a bit rude some of them aren't rude at all. None of them are super offensive. No need to be so butthurt about someone thinking you don't have many friends when you are obviously an introvert or that you don't read as much as 5 books a day as is shown in the readathon videos.
@@sarahishereforyourkidney Okay, great that you feel that way but what is considered rude and what's not differs from person to person and from culture to culture. I see no reason to call me 'butthurt' and undermine my feelings just because you have a different threshold for what you consider rude.
@@frogheart8440 you're right. This is just your personal opinion vs mine. But I can call you butthurt anyway because I think that and you can call me a sociopath but you won't because you're the good guy here and that would be rude. So yeah. I stand by what I said you're too sensitive (in my opinion) and I don't care about how much more butthurt you get from me telling that to you. Go on Saint Mary spread your love and empathy. Not everyone in life is gonna be super nice to you. If you start moaning over every little word someone calls you you'll have a hard time finding happiness. maybe I wrote all this becauee of my own unresolved issues and maybe I wrote this just because I wanted to upset you. Maybe I did this as a tough love thing. Come up with your own theory. Maybe I'm just a bad person. I am not quite sure myself anymore. It doesn't help that it's past 2 am. Well merry Christmas (or whatever you celebrate) to you dear crybaby stranger.
@@frogheart8440 okay I see I really managed to put a full on existential crisis into that reply. What I really meant is that I just disagreed with your original statement and had to phrase my words in a way that will actually give you a reason to be as hurt as you seemed from stranger doing what she asked them to do. It seemed to have worked but I managed to catch myself in it too. Well then... Just enjoy the Holidays.
Well said on the extroverted focus of society especially these days. Feeling like I don't have "enough" friends is something I still struggle with and I am inspired by your recognition that there is no problem with being an introvert in an extrovert's world.
Omg. I love how positively and honestly you have responded to so many of these assumptions. You have tried to look at it from another person's shoes, to see what it could possibly mean, the actual curiosity behind the questions. You could have so easily have gotten offended. I mean, I did at a couple of them, on your behalf, until I understood what they actually meant. This was a lovely video.
same!
True! She is so mature🥺
I really appreciate how much you value your privilege, and recognise how your family’s financial situation has positively impacted you academically. As someone who didn’t get a very good secondary education, I hope I am in a strong enough financial position to send my future children to a good quality school.
I like this message. Please include homeschooling for your future children. My son remembers one on one learning more than in school learning.
our pfps are a bit matching :))
Believing that your family is middle class and financially 'okay;' while also living in a mansion and attending 14 years of private education is not recognising ones privilege.
@@doris_1325we found out in the pandemic that this is not healthy for developing children.
@@AstrocyteBibliophiletell em bestie
Yesss another assumption video 😃😃
thanks so much for watching Ali 👻
I think making the studying aesthetic and romanticise life as long as it's done in the right way can help with motivation. Without your videos, lighting candles, doing digital detoxes, wearing nice outfits, turning on a water diffuser with some essential oil and listening to movie scores/lofi/meditation music, my motivation would plummet real fast! Maybe I've just gotten used to it but before when I did nothing of this I just never got in the mood to focus. My appreciation for nature would probably be different too if not for your aesthetic videos!
Thanks for raising awareness about adult bullying. As a victim its the most shameful feeling and I don't think people realise just how impactful it is on someone's wellbeing. Mentally and physically it can destroy you.
I think who is the person isn't victim is just bad. I can't imagine he or she can't realise how does it feel being bullied. He or she is just a bad person and he or she just liked it. I told this to you at 18, being bullied from even some of my teachers and most of my classmates. I hope I you can understand what did I mean cause English isn't my first language.
I’m so sorry that you’ve had to go through this. I’ve never experienced adult bullying, but can’t imagine how tough it is because you don’t have all of the provisions available to you when you’re young x
I’m so sorry to hear you experienced this. My mum experienced adult bullying and it was the most heartbreaking thing seeing her come home from work each day looking so defeated. Hope you’re doing okay now! Sending hugs 🤗
hugs x
It’s not about the quantity of friends, it’s about the quality. Sometimes 1 amazing friend is enough for a a lifetime
Hi Ruby! I was fascinated to learn that you are one of the first in your family to attend university. You come across as being knowledgeable of the "hidden curriculum" of higher education (the "how to's" of academia- students know from experience or because someone told them). I would love to watch a future video about how you gained this knowledge for yourself.
Yes, especially since her family seems pretty sharp, especially her mum.
Why is having a small friend group a bad thing? I used to be in a big friend group and it was the worst, I am so much happier now I have a small group of true friends I can rely on
ruby dont change, u r totally fine..i feel so related..why nobody doesnt understand that its normal and fine not being interessted in dating and its also fine to have 1-2 main friends and thats it...actually, i adore u exactly for these traits
Well not trying to be rude, no one can change Ruby's decisions.
@@vaishnavi1720 and that's what I like about people not letting social media or stereotypes form u
Ruby, I've been watching you for a year now. You're a beam of light in this world. Thanks for making our days more interesting. Lots of love 💙💙
This made me smile so much 🥺💕
I second this ♥️
“Assumptions can blind you; hypotheses can guide you." - Chris Voss
Hi Ruby !
Just wanted to say that I like that kind of videos. You're honest about every question, without filter. I also agree with you about that "extrovert society" : it makes me upset that people believe that if you're an introvert, or don't have much friends you're not a fun person. That's totally false. People have to think about who will be there for them when they need them to be... And they'll hopefully stop assuming about other's sociability.
"You never have those depression, non-activity, unproductive day." Can people please stop using depression as just a feeling like sadness when it is actually a real serious mental illness. Comments like this using the word depression is so annoying. You should make a video about cyber bullying which happens even more than bullying in real life and is very serious and dangerous.
@Chiro치로 "Depression differs from sadness. The feelings you have will affect all aspects of your life. It may be hard or even impossible to find enjoyment in anything, including activities and people you used to enjoy. Depression is a mental illness, not an emotion." So no its not a emotion.
@Chiro치로 A simple research shows you that depression is not a emotion. Sadness is a emotion, depression isn't. I copied and pasted for you above from Healthline, but a simple search will show you the same result from Mayo Clinic as well as others. Yes you can feel anxious without having a anxiety disorder, but you can't feel "depressed" without having depression.
@@pamrizzo6663 That just isn't true. Depressed mood can be a symptom of major depressive disorder, but it doesn't mean that people without major depressive disorder can't experience depression. It's like saying you can't have a runny nose without having a cold. When it's outside the context of a mental disorder, depression is usually less severe and/or shorter-lived (and often more linked to an identifiable cause, like suffering a loss or having a bad week) but it is still real.
I appreciate how thoughtful you're being about language and how caring you are towards people who experience depressive disorders. And making light of depression can definitely be problematic. But depression can and does happen outside of clinical disorders.
I'm older and I have been bullied at work. I had no self worth. I was told that if I left the company I would lose all my credibility. That it was the only job I could do but I still wasn't good enough. And when I had good ideas my manager took the credit for them. Don't stay in an environment like that. You deserve better
I can relate! The workplace can get truly toxic and detrimental to your health😬
THIS reminds me of my life.
You are so polite and elegant. Keep doing what you do and stay true to yourself! Many people would love to be productive like you ❤
Thank you so much. This is so extremely kind of you to comment x
@@RubyGranger8 you are very welcome, I truly think that ❤
I found this video to be very fascinating and fun to watch. I also wish that people would normalize having very little if any friends at all. Throughout my life, I have hardly had any friends, and for the past few years, I have had none at all. It's not that I am not interested, but rather, I have always found it difficult to find good and kindhearted people with similar interests that truly care about friendship and not just about bolstering the number of friends in their own friendship groups.
I feel you. I have always tried but I find most people find me quirky. They don't dislike me. They find me odd.
I do have some very good friends but unfortunately based on work schedules I do not see my few friends enough.
I wonder if you are maybe aromantic (and asexual)? I have kind of gotten that impression and wanted to suggest this for a while, because maybe you might find it helpful
girl i relate so much on the dating front!! i’m just not interested. in the same way that i’m not interested in playing football; i haven’t really tried it, but i know it’s not for me. no reason especially, i just don’t relate to the desire for a relationship that my friends have. and that’s okay!
Awww, we're so similar in so many ways. Short attention span when it comes to movies, not caring a lot about relationships, even the speedy walk thing. The only thing I'm lacking is getting my shit together :D
Wow, the part about worrying that the number of friends isn’t enough is so relatable for me. Every year unconstitutionally I would count and feel that I’m not good enough because I don’t have 10 or even 5 best friends. It’s so ok to have one or two if that’s what’s good for you
I feel you but its also more about quality rather than quantity cuz at the end of the day its about the ones that r real and genuine and will have your back and not stab you in the back. Most people are not our friends unfortunately, but there are people specifically chosen for us it feels like, cuz i have also a few very good friends, which i truly value and appreciate! They have helped me in every way, most people dont care but the ones that do and go out of their way to help you become a better version of you, those are the ones worth keeping close. Not everyone deserves access to us anyway cuz our energy is precious and not everyone is worthy of receiving it cuz they cant appreciate nor handle it:)
Agreed
How refreshing and very honest. Virginia Woolf wrote "A Room of One's Own." in 1929. I think today it might be entitled "A Space of One's Own." Despite all the leisure time available, more than ever we are under pressure to socialize offline and online. Your approach to this is commendable. I think your parents have done an excellent job! You are shy but confident enough to demand as Greta Garbo said in The Grand Hotel "I want to be alone." Keep on being yourself Ruby.
I feel like a lot of creators get really defensive when responding to assumptions, to the point where that’s what I expect of these videos… but Ruby is just so honest and genuine. I love to see it!
Ruby we NEED a podcast from you! Your voice is just so calming and relaxing
Great video. I don’t usually enjoy watching these kinds of videos, but this was really well put together .
Ah thank you!
you talking about how you just have a few close friends and are okay with that was so reassuring so thank you!
*5 things to quit for all people:*
*1. Caring about what others think*
*2. Not believing in yourself*
*3. Not prioritizing your health*
*4. Wasting your precious time*
*5. Chasing meaningless relationships*
Bro stop spamming 😭❤️
your response to the dating assumption reminded me of the book "loveless" by alice oseman. it's a great book about an aroace girl discovering herself during university and she has this amazing group of friends and it's just perfect.
edit: what you said about being introverted and that the world designed for extroverts is rlly something the main character of the book talks a lot about. READ IT!!
I'm aroace :) We should not assume that Ruby is but growing up I did not even know aroace was a thing. I didn't even know being ace was a thing. Then I realized after I found out I was ace..."oh, you are aro too."
XD
@@kpaxian6044 i know i should assume but i was hesitating to comment this but i felt like maybe if she is in anyway deep down questioning or confused, she would have this recommendation. was that a bad thing? i can delete the comment /gen :))
also,, ahhahahahahaha i am ace too and it was similar for me. I grew up thinking everyone was like me and i didn't know what asexuality was so when i was 17 i was reading about it and i was just like: oh.. i relate to this way too much
@@eduardaaraujo9039 no...not a bad idea to recommend at all. :) Your suggestion was lovely. Whether Ruby is or is not ace or anything else I am sure she would be interested in the book as I am interested in other orientations too. Your recommendation came from a kind and lovely place. ♡♡
@@kpaxian6044 thank you :)
Your family really shows that 'being academic' isn't necessarily related to 'being able to educate their children'. Even though your parents and grandparents left school early, they obviously love life and their family -- the activities you do together, with reading and painting are so important and insightful.
Your videos are always so warm and lovely and they never fail to remind me why I love learning so much. Even when I'm studying something I find difficult, I remind myself that it's okay to struggle and that in the end it will be okay if I just work hard and believe in myself. You're one of the kindest people here and I really am grateful for your videos. Take care, Ruby! 🧡
Out of curiosity, do you find yourself relating to aro/ace labels at all? I’m just wondering since your descriptions relating to relationships always seem to fit the bill quite well, yet I’ve never heard you use the terms specifically. No pressure to fix labels to yourself of course (in a public setting especially if you’re not comfortable to do so) and they’re purely descriptive anyway, it was just very eye opening for me personally when I found them at 19 and suddenly realized I had a whole community of similar people around me.
I've been thinking the same. My perception of the world in general changed a lot after discovering I am aroace and it had helped me a lot to understand myself better, so I thing it is worth mentioning it just in case Ruby (or others) could know about these orientations and (if it is the case), find if they identify with them of not. I didn't now aromatisism was a thing until I read about it in a TH-cam comment (it is not so commonly heard online as other orientations), so I get it is not on most people's radar.
Again, as you said, it is not about "imposing' labels in someone. If you don't want to date right now it doesn't necessarily mean you are aro, but learning about the therm could be really useful in understanding yourself and others.
I don't date but I'm not interested in some made up word labeling me 🤷♀️
@@brookjewell7489 Any word is just a made-up shortcut to convey something. You could say "pot with wax and a wick that that can be lit into a small, controlled flame"... Or you could just say "candle". The point being that the purpose of labels is not to confine you and put you into some sort of inescapable box, but rather serve to describe your experience to others in a concise way. I'm not saying that you have to define yourself - that's up to you entirely and not my place. But your phrasing of "some made up word" comes off a bit belittling towards all those who have found a huge amount of comfort in the knowledge that they're not alone.
@@flubberamoebes I'm aroace. :) I wish we did not live in a society that assumed heteronormativity.
There’s something so calming about you and your content. I’ve been a subscriber for a while now and usually don’t comment on videos but you seem like such a kind and positive person and that’s like a breath of fresh air on social media nowadays. I bet many people find peace and comfort in your channel, keep being yourself, we need more people like you
Ruby where is your cardigan from? I love it! 🤍
My dad always told me that “quality over quantity” is always best. That includes friends 💖 I’d much rather have a few true friends than a lot of people I only half know (and trust).
Ruby,
Great video! You seem like such a kind person. You are always so mindful and sensitive towards other people. Not many people would be able to answer to such assumptions about themselves with this much calm and poise.
I noticed you took down your most recent video about bullying. I assume that it was in response to the many comments and criticism you received on it. I read through most of it and although I think some of that criticism was valid, I was upset that many people completely dismissed your experience with bullying and were saying you were never really bullied (and especially disgusted by one comment related to your book somehow implying that if you were like Erimentha then you deserved to be bullied?). Even if you were not bullied physically (I don’t know if you were but even if you were not), I assume that being constantly harassed just for being who you are can greatly impact your self-esteem and lead you to feel extremely sad, anxious and lonely. Having your experience invalidated because people have it worse than you do will most likely only amplify those feelings. Although it’s important to recognized our privileges and what other people might be going through, the whole point of doing this is to help make the world a better place, which you can’t really do while being sad, anxious and lonely. I’ve never posted a comment on TH-cam before but I’ve been bothered by this over the last few days and really wanted to point this out.
Anyway, I think you are doing a great job with your channel. I relate to you a lot and I really enjoy watching your videos (especially the more chatty ones like this one). I hope you have wonderful day! 😊
Marie-Sophie (such a lovely name by the way), I cannot tell you how much this means to me. Thank you. The criticism on the video was totally valid (hence why I took it down), but that was the comment I struggled most with. My bullying wasn't anywhere near as bad as a lot of people's, and I know I was lucky that it wasn't worth, but it took me years to admit to myself that I even was bullied -- and quite a lot of therapy haha! So I appreciate you saying this.
I also feel honoured that this is your first TH-cam comment 💕
@@RubyGranger8 I’m so glad you saw this and it helped you in some way. Your reply means a lot to me also. Keep being the awesome person that you are! Lots of love, Marie-Sophie.
Movie you miight like (based on an assumption lol) : The sunlit night. It's set in Norway, it has lots of playful references to art and artistry, it's gentle and funny and sad.
I'll have to take a look - thank you :)x
Hey Ruby, I don’t mean to be rude or intrusive, but are you ok? Your eyes looked really sad despite looks gorg as always xx
Okay but why are some of these so mean? You do a lovely job of responding to these in a positive manner, but I'm so sorry that you had to deal with this negativity. Props to you for shining a positive light on this negativity!
I realised that I actually assumed you are never late hahaha but I think that is because you are so consistent as a TH-cam creator!
Quality rather than quantity, with regards to friendships. That's something we often learn as we grow older. Good on you for being your authentic self.
Thank you for talking about it being okay with having only a few friends. I started uni in person this fall and I’ve felt a lot of pressure to make a bunch of new friends and always feel bad about it because I’m just not that kind of person. But you’re right, it shouldn’t be so stigmatized and I shouldn’t feel pressure to change myself.
I find the assumptions about dating very interesting as they assume that dating is only valid if it is with someone else. I disagree with this premise, I think solo dating is so so valid and actually very beneficial. I am essentially dating myself, it doesn't mean I hold myself higher than others (because I most definitely do not, I am far from perfect) - it simply means this is my way of taking care of myself and the way I enjoy life the most. Everyone is different, I think if you enjoy dating other people - go for it!!! And if you know you are not much of a dating other people person - then don't feel pressured to do so (there is no point in doing something just because it's the norm). If you feel you are not a dating other people person, it does not mean you are not open to it, it just means you are not actively doing it as it's not something that you personally get much enjoyment from. For me, I believe that it will happen if it happens and if it doesn't it doesn't. Right now I'm just doing what I get the most joy out of and that is going on dates by myself. I am open to dating other people in the future if in the future, this is something I truly want to do and not just something I am doing because everyone else is.
Wow, I love this mindset Alice! I hope people read this! I love the idea of “dating yourself” and focusing on yourself (in a non-selfish way). We shouldn’t be sucked into adhering to the accepted social standard 🤍
Wow, I love this mindset Alice! I hope people read this! I love the idea of “dating yourself” and focusing on yourself (in a non-selfish way). We shouldn’t be sucked into adhering to the accepted social standard 🤍
According to one statistic published a few years ago, the number of people who don't have their first romantic relationship until reaching their mid-20s has risen significantly in the last quarter of a century. Even if that were not so, there is no race to find oneself a lover, though society seems to think otherwise. There is of course the argument made that women are up against the biological clock with regard to having children - pregnancy and birth, certainly for the first time, are less risky whilst you're young - but that argument is perhaps better not linked to the broader issue of relationships. After all, having children may not be on your mind when encountering someone you think you might want to spend time with and become very close to. And, assuming you even want children, you will want to have them with the right person; for various reasons, such a person may not be your first date, and indeed it's possible to have a number of failed relationships that may even put you off the idea of having any more - only then to find that special someone and have your mind totally changed.
So, if you are single and content to be, don't feel shame and don't allow others to make you feel ashamed. It is for each of us to discover ourselves as we go through life, and relationships are a part of that voyage of discovery.
If you're not cringing at your past self, you're not growing. sounds like one of these Instagram bs inspirational stories but cmon, this one at least has some truth to it
Oh my God, Ruby, you've opened my eyes!!! I walk really really fast and sometimes it annoys me so much, because this makes me even more tired. I can't do anything about it, it happens unconsciously and often my walking does not correlate with the walking of my companions. But I've never drawn a line between walking fast and being late - and I'm almost always late, too! Sometimes it happens that I prepare a lot in advance, but I still come late. It's definitely a trick of the universe 😅
going through a break up now, your videos make me feel calm and welcomed. thank you for all that you do.
For next video: Do you keep a habit tracker to keep track of the behaviors you want to minimize, get rid of, keep doing?
Ruby, you look stunning in this outfit. I am also a fast-walker. Lol.
Same here hahaha people comment about it all the time😂
They cant keep up with my speedy legs, i feel bad tho but cant help it😂
Ruby, you're such an amazing person. I can watch you all day! Your kindness , humility and intellect are something I look up to. Thankyou Ruby for sharing your life w us❤
wait whaat "you just focus on aesthetic not on actual studies" - i do not think that this one is true, i am watching your videos since 6 years (i guess from the beginning) & i tried watching other studytubers but unfortunately i couldn´t find many studytuber that are really into studying. i often think that many other that are recommended to me (for example with the video title "study day" ) are mostly into showing what they eat, drink, how they workout and aesthetic note taking (nothing false with aesthetics, i love it!) but the focus on aesthetics without much content make them seem rather superficial and that is NOT the case in your videos
i rather found that you are the only one who is more into actually learning the stuff & studying. that does not mean your videos aren´t aesthetically pleasant, they are !! but the focus in your videos is more on the studying than on the "aesthetics"
i hope i explained it well, love your videos!!
Ahh Sasha! That truly means so much to hear! I absolutely LOVE learning and studies and I’m so pleased that you can tell from my videos 🥺I have had a few people comment on how I prioritise aesthetics over studying and I must say I don’t quite understand it haha! xxx
@@RubyGranger8 yes, i can tell that! maybe the people commenting on that just saw one or two of your videos 🤷🏻♀️
p.s. thank you for answering Ruby, i read your answer this morning & it made my day! )) xx
Nobody knows you as well as they think you do on the internet. Glad you donated the revenue on this!
I just have to share this story with you cause you’ve helped me so much while I was going through bullying:
I was bullied a lot when I was about 14-15 by the girls in my class, a lot o slut shamming happened and other stuff.
I’m 23 now and been in therapy ever since the bullying started and have come to terms with it (you could say I’m at peace).
I’ve since became a financial planner and this week one of my worst bullies came to me for advice. I’m happy to say that I was able to be the “better” person and treated her as any other client and it made me feel so good to put that behind me, even though there was a lot of pain attached to the situation.
Anyways, thanks for being this amazing human being and sorry for any bad English (English is not my first language)
Always love what you have to say. Very open and honest. So natural. 😍
Thank you so much Gill :)
Yayy, I was looking for something to procrastinate to!
You’re such a lovely sweet gentle pure soul Ruby . I’m ur mums age and have three grown up children
Keep up the great work...you are a true comfort to thousands, if not millions of people! I am among those people.🥰🥰🥰
Thank you so much for such a lovely comment 🤍
@@RubyGranger8 ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I was diagnosed with avoidance personality disorder yesterday and OCD. I spend all my time alone in my room at uni, I thought it was just social anxiety but its actually avoidance personality disorder, which is 50% genetic and 50% triggered by bullying/abuse in childhood , People at uni just assume I'm ''weird'' or rude/stuck up.
*✊💪💪"*Believe in yourself. You are braver than you think, more talented than you know, and capable of more than you imagine.*"💪💪✊✊ *
I have very few friends and as I've grown older, I've grown quite content with it. Trying to gain friends and please people is exhausting. Socializing is exhausting. It's so much easier to have a few close people and screw all the rest. ;)
Ah... really appreciate that all ad revenue from this video will be donated to Ditch the Label - an anti-discrimination children's charity in the UK (in the description)
Their work is honestly *so* important - so do watch through ads if you have the time :)xx
Btw. My parents and grandparents never went to the university as well. I was the first one in my family who went to the university too. Sometimes it was very frustrating, because they have no idea until this day, what it's like studying at the university and how hard it can be and how much work you must do.
Loved watching this! Always looking forward to these videos
A very well done video Ruby. Your content is always fantastic. Keep up the good work young lady and thank you very much for what you do. Take care and have a productive week 😀
Would you ever consider filming those unproductive days? I just feel it's more realistic and more relatable to watch (though I do come to your vids for motivation LOL)
As an ambivert, I've realised a couple of things. Society is designed for extroverted people, but that's not a bad thing. Even though it seems like there are a lot of introverts, the truth is that being an introvert is the exception not the rule, and that's also not a bad thing. Humans are extremely social beings in general, and it makes sense for sociability to be such a core aspect of society, because society literally depends on socialisation to exist.
Love your honesty in this video and laying yourself bare. Especially with some of the more critical assumptions!! Good for you x
Hi! From México❤️🇲🇽
Hello, Ruby! I love your planners! I invested in all of them which are available as digital products. I use them all the time and my students like them too. Thank you for your amazing work. Pumpkin productivity is fabulous! ❤📚
Thank you for raising awareness against bullying! Even though these assumption videos can be quite harmless, I kind of felt like some of these assumptions were very direct and almost mean (i.e. the one about you pretending to read more than you do, or the one about you caring more about aesthetics than studying, or the one about you ONLY having one friend). I can only imagine how hard and possibly hurtful it must be to go through these assumptions about yourself and openly address them in a video. I also had the feeling that you were not entirely comfortable in this video, so I just wanted to say, that I really love your videos, I can tell you are deeply interested in your studies (I am studying English literature as well) and I hope none of these superficial assumptions were hurtful to you!
Unfortunately, most people consider it to be "bullying" only when the object is an LGBTQ person. Otherwise, it's just "growing pains", or even the fault of the victim for failing to ingratiate themselves with the bully. This leave offenders completely free to target people just because they are short, odd looking, clumsy, nerdy, or poor.
I'm absolutely shocked at the fact that you're not punctual!! 🤣🤣
People often are haha! I get it from my dad 🙈
First!! I love your videos so much. You're so inspiring and believe me when I say you have changed my life!
I admire how Ruby is so calm and understanding in the whole video. She seems like an elder sister who is explaining every assumption being so cool
What happened to your video about things you’ve learned from being bullied that was posted recently? I was gonna watch it but can’t find it.
It got taken down because, kind of ironically considering it was an anti-bullying video, there were lots of criticism of it, and a lot of people had complaints- I don’t know if its just a temporary thing while she edits it slightly or if its a permanent thing.
Elizabeth is right, the video was (quite rightfully) criticised and I decided to take it down. I really wanted it to be a helpful video but, since it had the potential for it to not be, I thought it best just to remove it. I know that particularly vulnerable people might be attracted to that video and I would hate for anything to be unhelpful.
(in case you're curious about particulars - because I would be!! - I was promoting a stoic model for approaching bullying -- which is the approach I took as a young teenager when getting bullied. It worked for me, but some people pointed out that we can't always control their thoughts & that it was toxic positivity. I retrospectively agreed that this could be toxic) xx
Thank u so much Ruby for posting another video like this ...I really wanted to watch the previous one but u took it down.. I'm sure u know best and we always love u & support u 💚🍀
I'm sorry that you didn't get to see it Salma 💕 I appreciate your kindness x
@@RubyGranger8 thank you so much dear Ruby for replying it made my day..please keep inspiring us 💕 and good luck 🌸
I’m 43 and 1. I’ve just found your videos. Although I’m not studying, I have just taken on a new role so finding productivity tools and tips etc. But trying to study and research for it in between. 2. You’re amazing. I don’t know how you find the time. 3. What you just said about being extroverted. I’ve always thought this. Why do we celebrate it so much? Who cares? Happiness is the ultimate goal. I have 4 very close friends and obviously my husband and son and that’s all I need in life. Anyway, I’m very much looking forward to bingeing in your videos!
I completely agree with how society constructs you around having loads of friends and being an extrovert, as someone who finds it hard to make friends it’s really just so true to what you are saying and thank you because it makes me feel less alone! ❤️
I love how she gives a little description for everything. It makes her videos more entertaining, inspiring and you can easily relate to it
Ruby, you are very honest and open and true to yourself. I'm happy you are comfortable with the way you choose to live your life. Never let that go.
I cannot agree more that society is geared towards extroverts! It’s actually sad and frustrates me because it’s totally fine to be an introvert
i recently watched the movie THE NUTCRACKER and i realized that your background music is from there!! love your videos by the way you are so influential to lots of people like me
Which Nutcracker film did you watch? I love the soundtrack so much! You should watch the ballet clips online :) x
@@RubyGranger8 i watched the 2011 version with Elle Fanning as Mary. I REALLY enjoyed it! I will check out the clips xx Also just a suggestion could you ask the comments in your videos to do assumptions and questions for Q and A's because i know lots of people don't have Intagram:)
Can I just say how beautiful your whole channel is??!!!!
Greetings from USA!
ah that's so lovely of you to say haha! x
100% agree with how society is built for extroverted people and I'm definitely an introvert and it's really hard because apart from maybe my dad the rest of my family are all extroverts and it's really hard growing up in a family who do love me but find it strange that I dont have many friends and prefer going out just by myself sometimes, like I love going to London by myself and soak up the atmosphere which sometimes you cant really do with a group of people. Like other people have said I find it mental exhausting going out with people and i need a few days to recharge 😊 thank you Ruby you've honsetly helped me out so much these last few years and have helped me learn about myself, I'm in my 30s as well and still learning who I am. 😊
Talking about bullying in adulthood is so important! Thank you for bringing it up. Many times people can have the same mindset as they had in school. I was bullied for my weight in primary school, but I see the same comments people using on social media or when commenting on celebrities. It is awful and damaging. Also, coming from Slovakia (arguably an openly xenophobic and racist country) it took me a long time, large amount of inner dialogues and living for 3 years in another country - UK to realise my ways and thinking patterns are WRONG. Still a long way to go, but awareness is key i think :)
Thank you again for this video and all of your content! I love the community here, so also a huge thanks to everyone reading this!
I am annoyed that I still find articles like " Tired of being introverted? here are 5 tips on how to speak up and be more extroverted". I'd like to see an article that says " Too extroverted? here's how to stop screaming and feel fine being alone for more than 5 damn minutes".
edit: grammar
Rubi, me gustan mucho tus videos sobre la sociedad, la soledad..
Me pareces única y es super chévere como tú eres.. : )!!
Hey Ruby! Your videos are a really great source of inspiration and motivation. You have helped me love studying. Your personality is really charming and I always feel a sense of warmth when I see your videos. You are my role model and thank you so much for helping me like to read more. Thank you again for your efforts and lovely videos!Lots of love😃😃
I found the lovely hello autumn laptop wallpaper you also had. Can’t wait to see what you have chosen for Christmas/winter. Please share!
honestly some of these assumptions were a bit rude and I think you responded to them in a very classy way. 👏🏼
She sounds like Hermione Granger from Harry Potter...Amazing❤❤❤
So you can manage to focus on reading chapters of a book for a long time but not a film? I have the opposite problem because during a film or documentary I can be doing something at the same time on my phone or whatever. How do you manage to read so much without losing interest?
Not meant to sound rude I genuinely want to improve my attention span 😂
Love to know that ruby and I have been late to very thing in common hahaha 😅😂
Snap!
RUBYYYYY!!!! I FOUND ANOTHER INSTANCE OF SIMILITUDE WITH YOU! I'm too uninterested in dating someone, and like to reason it with yours. God! I am so happy to know that I am not the only weird girl in this world!
i absolutely relate to watching movies over a longer span of time. it's so hard to focus on it for like 2 hours and not do anything else in between!
It's not like something is over aesthetic and not aesthetic it's just about how you prefer it to be..so you can't judge someone for how there study table is arranged 🙂
Yo no tengo amigos,ni uno.Hace poco elimine Instagram,me canse de tanta "falsedad'.Ahora estoy muy antisociable y estoy muy bien asi.Solo hablo un poco con mi familoa,pero tambien me cuesta.Que se yo,no se como terminara este camino.
You don’t have to answer this but, what do you’re parents work as?
Hola from México💚! I love your videos :)