In the realm of automotive enchantment, the 2024 BMW XM transcends conventional paradigms, melding audacity with opulence. Its ethereal design evokes symphonic crescendos while its aerodynamic prowess dances with the wind. Gifting drivers an orchestral symphony of power, precision, and panache, this automotive masterpiece orchestrates a harmonious concerto of unrivaled exhilaration. Well Done.
@@papa_pt The multifarious intricacies and labyrinthine convolutions of the ChatGPT's linguistic expanse entangle my cognitive faculties, rendering its utilization an enigmatic enigma of insurmountable magnitude.
I still can’t get over how good these videos now look with an HDR master. It enables me to really appreciate the piano black textures, along with the shine on Mark’s head. Truly revolutionary.
@@busterscrugsThat's actually your browser's fault if you're on Windows. I can assure you that the blue paint in this video looks almost identical to my neighbors XM
Lexus had already perfected styling their cars to look like they've been crash tested, so BMW had to start styling theirs to make you WISH they'd get crash tested.
Fortunately, it looks like this car is actually going to be a commercial failure, contrary to what Jack said. There are already 500 sitting on dealer lot with dealers already advertising discounts, which is highly abnormal in the current car market.
There’s nine nearby sitting on lots in the tech getto I live in waiting for some someone to lease them. If you’re looking to show off the XM isn’t as recognizable as a Range Rover, G Wagon or Cayenne.
We need a new word that goes beyond pompous or conceited something like hyper-conceited maybe? In the visual dictionary, just put the BMW logo next to it.
What I don't get is, wouldn't they have sold out a traditional halo car as well? Which limited number super expensive hyper car, and I get that this isn't one, did not sell out within 0.5 second? They could have still tested their newest teck, they could have still made the budget worth it, and they could have avoided to fall into this image nightmare. Bmw basically fall from this driver focused car brands, to the most money worshipping, ultra rich prostitute...
This vehicle will elevate my engagement with my TikTok audience, and secure my rightful place in the influncesphere. I will be the trendiest guy in the Arby's drive through. #breaknecks
Somewhere along the line, bling became the guiding principle for BMW product teams rather than letting the quality and performance speak for itself. It’s sad to see if you are old enough to remember when the best cars in the world came from Germany.
Come on im a huge bmw fan and own a current 5 series but they’ve always had one questionable car if not more. The trends are bad now though thats for sure. The last gen thats leaving looks better than the next. Will be keeping my 5 for a long time.
On an 18 wheeler the bare rims are often 22.5"; the common tire for that rim is 40" in diameter. If you're around 6ft tall the semi truck tire is going to be roughly waist high on you. If you're a dwarf under 5' tall you are likely to have short legs relative to your upper body and the BMW tire will be roughly waist height on you.
funny stuff, after this gets used heavy....it would cost maybe 10k to keep it alive per year once warranty is gone, its why new cars are no fun, they will not really have more than 2 owners.
Do yourself a favor, prospective B58 buyers - get one with a 6-speed. Not just a Supra, they made em in the F-chassis M240i/340i/440i too. That motor's so clearly designed to work with a torque converter, which makes me all the more happier to be the guy who got the "wrong" transmission. It's so fun.
That marketing is beyond ridiculous. The sad part is that a market for this soulless, disposable garbage, actually exists. Somehow it reminds of that episode of the Simpsons where Homer is allowed to design a car that ends up bankrupting his brother.
The end-game of capitalism; exchange value vs. use value. Nothing can be appreciated for what it is; everything (and everyone) is only appreciated as a means to an end. Status signaling, in this car. Heaven help the people still trying to climb the infinite ladder.
For me, it's for ultra-wealthy newly rich. When you don't have an acquired taste, but want to show off at any cost. Then something that looks different and flashy brings more attention. I think it's the perfect car for a teenager that has a newly-rich ultra wealthy parents, coming from a family that was in extreme poverty not long before. Such families have this urge to prove they are worth something, even if it means resorting to complete kitsch. There are many newly-rich people in Asia right now because of economic development, so maybe they also target them.
Of course they could just like it. Folks act as if you're less of an ass in cayenne turbo. None of the vehicle in this price bracket are sleepers. Why would fork out 180k for that.
@@bigcjmThat's because you ARE less of an ass in a Cayenne Turbo! 😊 At least you're showing some taste and discrimination (even if you're not sure that's what you did...but were coached by someone who did!) This BMW is both for people who have zero discrimination--as mentioned, the newly mega rich--and those that know exactly what they're doing but still have (and maybe because it does blatantly show) zero taste.
Gotta say I love Mark calling the automotive world out, buyers and manifacturers, on the ridiculousness of the "performance SUV". Especially this level, where its compensation on top of compensation to create a technological "marvel" and upkeep nightmare that remains compromised in key driving areas.
As someone in the design industry, I see what the designers may have been trying to do with many of the design elements, and I DO actually like a lot of what was done. I will clarify that statement though by saying, this is IF you zoom into these particular elements and view them in a vacuum. What do I see when I pull back and see this thing as a whole? To me it’s the perfect physical analogy to an artist’s sketchbook or sheet of trace paper. A collection of interesting ideas but drawn out at different times, with different aims. To me, this product is BMW’s way to fast track their design process and present what should be 3-4 design iterations and model years, and compact them into 1 to see what works with the public. If the result of this model is BMW finding a way to modernize and introduce a new design language sooner, rather than giving us normal, expected designs but with beaver teeth grills or lego-inspired front and rear fenders of the M2…I might accept this XM and give BMWa pass, but I’m not too hopeful at this point.
Details, surfacing and proportions are well-executed for what it is. And what it is is an ostentatious military bunker for the nouveau riche. A celebration of conspicuous consumption designed to shout and run over anyone in its way. As such I can not respect it. And unless our world turns into a dystopian nightmare a la Cyberpunk 2077, this will always look dated and out of place.
In the age of clay models and even more relevant rapid and realistic 3D models this is a BS excuse. I am also in product design and the whole failure of "design by committee" excuse is no longer relevant for any serious product design companies - especially the size of BMW. This is a failing of a poor design lead, do not conflate this with the designers at the bottom.
Driven it a couple times at BMW events. It’s an f’in brick and a fugly one at that. After each event, the BMW reps came up and asked us what we thought. Each time I said “I’d rather have an X5 Competition and have some left over cash!” The reps were speechless.
I saw one in person the other day. It wall all black. I think it looks pretty good. I could see myself picking one up if the used market crushes its value, but I think it'll probably hold its value after the sharp initial decline since its one of the cheapest showoff SUVs on the market.
@Jimmmmmmmy thats a terrible idea this thing will last a few years then all the electronics will fall apart. I bet the 10 year cost of ownership will be $100k +
Just because everyone hates something upon release doesn't mean it's going to be a future classic. There are a few examples where this was the case, and youtubers like DeMuro highlight it. People also oversubscribe to the idea; now you have all the woke and meta car enthusiasts repeating the same empty phrase about shitty cars that are doomed to failure. People hated the E65 7 series when it came out. And now you can travel to the shittiest town within 20 miles of you and pick one up for 3000 dollars.
Very bold of BMW to give this slab an even bigger sniffer to demonstrate to the dealers how their noses should look after all the coke they snort while thinking of ways to get these things off the lot.
After seeing this vehicle, I'm glad I don't have enough money or social media influence to afford it. If this is what the automotive future looks like, I'll drive my Honda Accord until it dies.
It’s so hard to believe that Turbowski used to be this channels main source of humor. This channel has grown so much and represents the absolute best of trolling, humor and intellect. I LOVE THIS CHANNEL!!!
I don't know what Turbowski is, but unfortunately YT appears to be demoting this channel instead of promoting it. I wonder what this guys have 'sinned' for that kind of treatment? I wish them the best and continue to recommend this channel to every car enthusiast friend.
@@mrtopcat2 He had a repair shop that Mark would take cars into to put on the lift and get a mechanic's opinion on. Go back and watch some of the early reviews.
@@kgb4187 OK, thanks for that. But that does not explain why this channel is not promoted more by YT and instead appears to be demoted. Seriously, I have some car guy friends and it hasn't been recommended to any of them. To me neither by the way. I only found out via word of mouth from another friend.
@@mrtopcat2The TH-cam suggestion algorithm works in strange ways. Some channels put in work to get an edge with the algorithm, maybe SG doesn't but who really knows. I doubt it's anything malicious.
Mark, all you need to know is that this monstrosity exists because the Lamborghini Urus exists. It's like the escalation that Commissioner Gordon mentions at the end of Batman Begins.
"Plan your next trip to Illinois today" with the shaving cheese onto a pizza had me dying 🤣 Also, the E72 X6 ActiveHybrid was BMW's first experiment with doing exactly this mix of a turbo V8 with a electric hybrid drivetrain that mated to the transmission.
My neighbors leased one years ago. I’m not sure if they enjoyed it. However, I believe this powertrain was designed from the ground up. Like Jack said, this vehicle will be the field tester for eventual TSBs in future M products.
Mark and Jack, laughter my head off at this review / philosophical debate. If I may but in, I would say decadence dosent know logic, rationality or prudence. Keep up the good work👍🏻
The reason this channel is great is because it’s real. They don’t make every car seem like the best thing in the world and highlight both the flaws and what’s great unlike others
It really is. It'd work better as a BMW flagship rather than M. That way they could give it a good ride and gone all out on luxury. I'd still hate it, but it'd make more sense to me.
Really tired of how words don’t mean things these days. Literally , is not a word that’s meant to be used figuratively 😅. This vehicle is not literally a pig… is it pig like yes but it is not LITERALLY a pig. You mean figuratively omg.
This is such a cynical episode… and it’s mainly because you’re absolutely right. It’s hard to look into the future of automobiles and not be somewhat depressed, especially at the top of the market.
There's a new M5 in my area which appears to have that similar shade of blue, it's fantastic with the copper accents. That's all I have to say about the XM!
The XM is a performance car that uses the other definition of performance. It's not about what it can do but about being seen in one. This is as car that was designed from the ground up to be either a prop in, or the setting of, Instagram posts. The majority of the content with this vehicle in it will be the steering wheel or dashboard with random motivational quotes about money or hustling/grinding
tall, extremely heavy (over 6000lbs), very fast (700hp) and in the hands of the target demographic. This is car is going to be dangerous to everyone but the person driving it
That blue color is VERY nice. There is an M550i XDrive on Turo near LA with the identical blue color + copper trim. Rented it a handful of times, gets a lots stares for a 5 series
It’s incredible to think that the Pontiac Aztek looks like a sound investment in comparison. Even new, they weren’t going to completely bankrupt you as long as you didn’t think about the papier-mâché transmission.
I hosted a party on Saturday where I made everyone watch a compilation of AI Jack clips without any context. No one has spoken to me since and I think someone took my cat when they left that night.
For people looking in a few years to buy one coming off lease, this thing might set a record for depreciation. I'm very curious what they sell for after 30-something thousand miles.
This vehicle just shows how lost BMW M has been for years. You guys touch on this in the video but this soulless vapid BS is the opposite of what BMW M used to stand for years ago. What a sad world.
Video edits like this is partly why you guys are my favorite car review channel.. absolutely love the comedy and style of the vid. The AI stuff is def funny but for me sometimes it gets overplayed and a bit too weird lol this one was hysterical but yeah just giving inputs. Keep up the great work, happy 4th 😎
I wonder if they ever run these designs through existing BMW customers. It looks as if they are giving the finger to their existing enthusiast/ fan base and trying to get a completely new one.
good point, people with TASTE like x3's and x5's, the x3m40i is a really nice modern BMW for sure, I really do like them, and I think those are German made, but maybe not.
Hopefully one day we get back to efficient, very aerodynamic, sedan like, low consumption vehicles. This whole trend of SUVs is ingnoring everything we learned in the last 60 years of automotive development.
Mercedes EQS? Ioniq 6? And of course: Toyota Prius, Honda Clarity (discontinued) etc. One day buyers will see the light and prioritise buying vehicles with low drag coefficient, one hopes. 🙂
Your channel is one of the first regular one to have HDR content. Hats off to you for actually properly using the format. The colorgrading and use of dynamic range is excellent! The highligts reallly pop on my oled laptopscreen.TH-cam has rarely looked this good.
I get why they did it..this is for Movie Stars and Athletes. Not sure it had to be an M car though... They should have spun off a brand like Maybach and Mercedes
17:40 RIGHT THERE!! completely agree with Mark. hense why i can't stand alot of new vehicles that fall into this category. it truly is a waste of resources.
Great video and I love the “hate flooring” you were doing with it. It deserves the hate and BMW should be embarrassed that they green lit this disaster.
Watching you drive that thing down the road almost shook my retinas loose. It's crazy to see a smoother ride and less camera shake in your GT3RS video than this (granted that was on track).
My local dealer had 6 in stock last month. Went over the weekend just to browse and they were all gone. Apparently there’s definitely a market for these.
L o l. One of the most spicy reviews from our guys in a long long time. Agreed though...not a car for almost most people and it's a testament to potentially wasted development funds that could have gone into a sports car or just something else.
My wife said the interior, particularly the ambient lighting, reminded her of a downtempo club in New York. And I think that is exactly what BMW is aiming for here. You buy this for the same reason you buy a Michael Jordan athletic shoe.
I'm guessing a big part of the appeal of this car is that it makes boomers angry. Kind of like "you ruined our future, now we will ruin the things you love" type of deal.
18:20 Excellent points. With BMW being the builder of "ultimate driving machines" the relative lack of exotic mid-engine supercars in their lineup is totally illogical.
Several years ago I submitted a design idea to t-shirt company blipshift. It was the BMW M logo with the words Past: Motorsport, Present: Meh, Future: Marketing. They didn’t accept it. 😅 The disgusted look on Mark’s face throughout the entire review says it all…
Been into BMWs for the last 20 years. I've been fortunate enough to drive 3 series 5 series and 7 series. I have owned X5Ms and X6Ms in 2022 and 2023. I just picked up an XM a few weeks ago. I have managed to drive it around 2000 Miles. The car is amazing in every aspect. My commute into the city is 60 miles each way and my roads are very good. I find the car very comfortable, incredibly responsive and solid and safe in speeds in excess of 125mph. I typically really don't care about gas mileage but already I am seeing 21 mpg. These guys need to spend a lot more time behind the wheel of this masterpiece to then conclude that it is not worth it. Anyone who is an enthusiast and is contemplating this vehicle should test drive this vehicle for a few hours and take it on different types of roads. I do not agree with there negative comments at all. Thank you for your time.
Great review, although I'm sensing some missed opportunities here. I'm having visions of Wham's "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" soundtrack playing with the opening shots of the XM, followed by a reenactment by Jack and Mark of the gasoline fight scene from Zoolander?
Early signs indicate this car is going to be a sales flop, which is really satisfying. They're sitting on dealer lots with discoutns already, unprecedented for a new car in 2023.
In the realm of automotive enchantment, the 2024 BMW XM transcends conventional paradigms, melding audacity with opulence. Its ethereal design evokes symphonic crescendos while its aerodynamic prowess dances with the wind. Gifting drivers an orchestral symphony of power, precision, and panache, this automotive masterpiece orchestrates a harmonious concerto of unrivaled exhilaration.
Well Done.
GPT 4?
@@papa_pt The multifarious intricacies and labyrinthine convolutions of the ChatGPT's linguistic expanse entangle my cognitive faculties, rendering its utilization an enigmatic enigma of insurmountable magnitude.
What what............
@@dannoyes4493😂😂😂
Are you serious or ironic?? 🤣
You guys are so behind the times. The target market for the XM would not be caught dead in any Patagonia apparel.
lol
Nice
😂😂😂😂😂 true
Absolutely. It is for the discerning Balenciaga connoisseur who would buy a sneaker with cable ties.
You’re telling me finance bros wouldn’t be driving this to the Hamptons??
I still can’t get over how good these videos now look with an HDR master. It enables me to really appreciate the piano black textures, along with the shine on Mark’s head. Truly revolutionary.
Emotional damage
Funny - I noticed the super bright SG logo during the sound graph display. "Wait... are we seeing HDR?!"
I think it looks blown out and oversaturated. The quality of the SDR version has gone down too, but that's youtube's fault.
Mark has been using that bougie hair oil for that shine. The paint on the XM almost matches the quality of the sheen.
@@busterscrugsThat's actually your browser's fault if you're on Windows. I can assure you that the blue paint in this video looks almost identical to my neighbors XM
This might be the only car that somehow looks better after being crash tested.
You might be on something - it was looking hideous before the crash test, after the crash they thought...dust it up - not its looking better!
I want to name this car 'Graham'.
(Aka 'human' designed to survive a car crash)
That goes for every new BMW being released this year tbh. The new 5 series is hideous.
Lexus had already perfected styling their cars to look like they've been crash tested, so BMW had to start styling theirs to make you WISH they'd get crash tested.
😂
Those under 30s and Zoomers surely can afford to shell out $170K for a crossover. Well done with the target market, BMW.
Fortunately, it looks like this car is actually going to be a commercial failure, contrary to what Jack said. There are already 500 sitting on dealer lot with dealers already advertising discounts, which is highly abnormal in the current car market.
Its for the jackson mahomes type.
Piece of cake man, with housing and living costs around the world being at an all time high :D
I'm about to order one right away.
There’s nine nearby sitting on lots in the tech getto I live in waiting for some someone to lease them. If you’re looking to show off the XM isn’t as recognizable as a Range Rover, G Wagon or Cayenne.
Yes, with their no jobs and warm couches in mommies basement.
Marketing isn’t the only trainwreck I see here
We need a new word that goes beyond pompous or conceited something like hyper-conceited maybe? In the visual dictionary, just put the BMW logo next to it.
This is why I fucking hate marketing people
I see a brilliant masterpiece
What I don't get is, wouldn't they have sold out a traditional halo car as well?
Which limited number super expensive hyper car, and I get that this isn't one, did not sell out within 0.5 second?
They could have still tested their newest teck, they could have still made the budget worth it, and they could have avoided to fall into this image nightmare.
Bmw basically fall from this driver focused car brands, to the most money worshipping, ultra rich prostitute...
The "turboCHARGER" at 7:13 is a GOAT SG moment.
Even my Ai bot has subtle nuances.
TURBOCHEGHERA?
Then savage geese version of BACKSRATCHAH! Beejees Jack frosted flow.
Turbochargeur, tres bien!
Stolen from Mighty Car Mods
This vehicle will elevate my engagement with my TikTok audience, and secure my rightful place in the influncesphere. I will be the trendiest guy in the Arby's drive through. #breaknecks
Based
rage baiting irl
I will follow like and subscribe to you and click on all your pop up ads, I demand nothing but the best in entertainment because I deserve it.
Arbies 😅
yup, todays young elite, going to the mcdonalds drive thru in these monsters, oh well, enjoy ''dat'' fake food.
I'm old enough to remember when BMW made zero embarrassing cars.
This is ghastly.
But not old enough to enthusiast complained about the 2002 BMW 7 series back end and the BMW 1 series.
@@Vizion-jp8zj That's true. "The Bangle butt." That was a bad year for one car.
A lot of people didn't like the 3 Compact at the time IIRC.
Somewhere along the line, bling became the guiding principle for BMW product teams rather than letting the quality and performance speak for itself.
It’s sad to see if you are old enough to remember when the best cars in the world came from Germany.
Come on im a huge bmw fan and own a current 5 series but they’ve always had one questionable car if not more. The trends are bad now though thats for sure. The last gen thats leaving looks better than the next. Will be keeping my 5 for a long time.
Hey! It's everyone's favorite German Pontiac Aztec!
😂😅🤣 straight outta South Carolina
Yo this is legit hilariously true
@@AH-bm4ts Where the working class is servile. The American South is to Germany what Mexico is to the United States.
The Aztec has aged better than this will. It was a head of its time. Look at the Kia Kona. Chevy Blazer, similar headlight arrangement.
Best comment ever!
700 plus hp, 6000 plus lbs, with 22” tires, you can literally watch your saving disappear before the mechanical breakdowns in foreseeable future.
* 23" tyres. Bigger than the 22.5" tyres on a semi-trailer, but becoming increasingly popular. 🙂
On an 18 wheeler the bare rims are often 22.5"; the common tire for that rim is 40" in diameter.
If you're around 6ft tall the semi truck tire is going to be roughly waist high on you. If you're a dwarf under 5' tall you are likely to have short legs relative to your upper body and the BMW tire will be roughly waist height on you.
funny stuff, after this gets used heavy....it would cost maybe 10k to keep it alive per year once warranty is gone, its why new cars are no fun, they will not really have more than 2 owners.
I saw one driving on the interstate last week and you could just see the mistake the guy made in his eyes
Was he a 30-year-old dedicated follower of fashion?
@@MathsYknowoh certainly
Very expensive mistake.
That was Mark
I feel like that anytime I see someone in the newer giant grill BMWs.
The two smartest and most honest people in automotive TH-cam.
No other vehicle screams mom and dad didn’t give me enough attention as a child like the XM does.
I’m pretty sure even the hardcore M fanboys are disgusted. This is truly the end of BMW as it used to be.
Well, it's just the typical garbage modern OVER PRICED turd mobile.
It screams "my mom and dad didn't give me enough attention but were nice enough to get me this car".
Jack has singlehandedly sold more B58 Beemers than any salesman ever! BMW owes you a big commission.
Do yourself a favor, prospective B58 buyers - get one with a 6-speed. Not just a Supra, they made em in the F-chassis M240i/340i/440i too. That motor's so clearly designed to work with a torque converter, which makes me all the more happier to be the guy who got the "wrong" transmission. It's so fun.
@@porschelover04I wouldn't buy any vehicle with an automatic. I am 28 and will never buy another automatic or ever buy an EV in my whole life span.
Bought one of these with the litigation money I won after suing BMW for the seizure I had watching the promotional material
HAHA, yeah did you see that one ad with the nba players???? ''we can't speak manzzzz''
That marketing is beyond ridiculous. The sad part is that a market for this soulless, disposable garbage, actually exists. Somehow it reminds of that episode of the Simpsons where Homer is allowed to design a car that ends up bankrupting his brother.
Was that the Canyonero?
The end-game of capitalism; exchange value vs. use value. Nothing can be appreciated for what it is; everything (and everyone) is only appreciated as a means to an end. Status signaling, in this car. Heaven help the people still trying to climb the infinite ladder.
Well, to be honest the BMW XM is really floppin in term of sales.
For me, it's for ultra-wealthy newly rich. When you don't have an acquired taste, but want to show off at any cost. Then something that looks different and flashy brings more attention. I think it's the perfect car for a teenager that has a newly-rich ultra wealthy parents, coming from a family that was in extreme poverty not long before. Such families have this urge to prove they are worth something, even if it means resorting to complete kitsch. There are many newly-rich people in Asia right now because of economic development, so maybe they also target them.
Urus? If that’s your goal.
Of course they could just like it. Folks act as if you're less of an ass in cayenne turbo. None of the vehicle in this price bracket are sleepers. Why would fork out 180k for that.
@@bigcjmThat's because you ARE less of an ass in a Cayenne Turbo! 😊 At least you're showing some taste and discrimination (even if you're not sure that's what you did...but were coached by someone who did!) This BMW is both for people who have zero discrimination--as mentioned, the newly mega rich--and those that know exactly what they're doing but still have (and maybe because it does blatantly show) zero taste.
So, NBA then?
A reggaeton singer😂
Gotta say I love Mark calling the automotive world out, buyers and manifacturers, on the ridiculousness of the "performance SUV". Especially this level, where its compensation on top of compensation to create a technological "marvel" and upkeep nightmare that remains compromised in key driving areas.
Reminds me when Top Gear reviewed the X5 & X6 & also raced the Q7 V12TDI around its test track, & how poorly they performed there
As someone in the design industry, I see what the designers may have been trying to do with many of the design elements, and I DO actually like a lot of what was done. I will clarify that statement though by saying, this is IF you zoom into these particular elements and view them in a vacuum. What do I see when I pull back and see this thing as a whole? To me it’s the perfect physical analogy to an artist’s sketchbook or sheet of trace paper. A collection of interesting ideas but drawn out at different times, with different aims. To me, this product is BMW’s way to fast track their design process and present what should be 3-4 design iterations and model years, and compact them into 1 to see what works with the public.
If the result of this model is BMW finding a way to modernize and introduce a new design language sooner, rather than giving us normal, expected designs but with beaver teeth grills or lego-inspired front and rear fenders of the M2…I might accept this XM and give BMWa pass, but I’m not too hopeful at this point.
Interesting
Great comment
Details, surfacing and proportions are well-executed for what it is. And what it is is an ostentatious military bunker for the nouveau riche. A celebration of conspicuous consumption designed to shout and run over anyone in its way. As such I can not respect it. And unless our world turns into a dystopian nightmare a la Cyberpunk 2077, this will always look dated and out of place.
I`m sure, Jeff Dahmer had some good traits as well.
In the age of clay models and even more relevant rapid and realistic 3D models this is a BS excuse. I am also in product design and the whole failure of "design by committee" excuse is no longer relevant for any serious product design companies - especially the size of BMW. This is a failing of a poor design lead, do not conflate this with the designers at the bottom.
The XM, the offical car of Balenciaga Executives, if you see one on the street, hide your children and elderly.
The children, I get it, but why the elderly
@@grigorioschristodoulou5229boomers are scared of taste/fashion
Driven it a couple times at BMW events. It’s an f’in brick and a fugly one at that. After
each event, the BMW reps came up and asked us what we thought. Each time I said “I’d rather have an X5 Competition and have some left over cash!” The reps were speechless.
And the X5M is much better looking, well, the old one's were anyway, Gimme a '15 X5M PLEASE!
This is the perfect example of a BMW that everyone hates. This makes it an instant classic.
I saw one in person the other day. It wall all black. I think it looks pretty good. I could see myself picking one up if the used market crushes its value, but I think it'll probably hold its value after the sharp initial decline since its one of the cheapest showoff SUVs on the market.
Instant class-sick.
@@Jimmmmmmmy it looks good because you can't see any of the car's "features"😅
@Jimmmmmmmy thats a terrible idea this thing will last a few years then all the electronics will fall apart. I bet the 10 year cost of ownership will be $100k +
Just because everyone hates something upon release doesn't mean it's going to be a future classic.
There are a few examples where this was the case, and youtubers like DeMuro highlight it. People also oversubscribe to the idea; now you have all the woke and meta car enthusiasts repeating the same empty phrase about shitty cars that are doomed to failure.
People hated the E65 7 series when it came out. And now you can travel to the shittiest town within 20 miles of you and pick one up for 3000 dollars.
I think the only way to make this thing more gaudy would be with a gold chain steering wheel and 26” spinnahs 😂
😂
Maybe curb feelers and a “aaaooogah” horn?🥴
Lol. It would have to have the stars and bars covering the rear window, mud tires, and a Carolina squat to make it gaudier.
it will be available
BMW individual does that for you. Bet we will see some tuning of sorts soon 😂
Very bold of BMW to give this slab an even bigger sniffer to demonstrate to the dealers how their noses should look after all the coke they snort while thinking of ways to get these things off the lot.
After seeing a video comparing the modern grille design for BMW to Hitler's moustache, that's all I see any more on the front of a car like this
Lmao
A car for jag-offs, as we say in Chicago.
Do those hawking Malort like it's something fancy fit the mold here, or are they the opposite 🤔? Nobody knows.
We need a Prius with 8 inch ground clearance
I'd rather drive that than the XM
@@taterc229v8s aren’t for everyone
That’s a RAV4 hybrid and Plug-in Hybrid
After seeing this vehicle, I'm glad I don't have enough money or social media influence to afford it. If this is what the automotive future looks like, I'll drive my Honda Accord until it dies.
It’s so hard to believe that Turbowski used to be this channels main source of humor. This channel has grown so much and represents the absolute best of trolling, humor and intellect. I LOVE THIS CHANNEL!!!
I don't know what Turbowski is, but unfortunately YT appears to be demoting this channel instead of promoting it. I wonder what this guys have 'sinned' for that kind of treatment? I wish them the best and continue to recommend this channel to every car enthusiast friend.
@@mrtopcat2 He had a repair shop that Mark would take cars into to put on the lift and get a mechanic's opinion on. Go back and watch some of the early reviews.
@@kgb4187 OK, thanks for that. But that does not explain why this channel is not promoted more by YT and instead appears to be demoted. Seriously, I have some car guy friends and it hasn't been recommended to any of them. To me neither by the way. I only found out via word of mouth from another friend.
Didn't he get deported?
@@mrtopcat2The TH-cam suggestion algorithm works in strange ways. Some channels put in work to get an edge with the algorithm, maybe SG doesn't but who really knows. I doubt it's anything malicious.
Mark, all you need to know is that this monstrosity exists because the Lamborghini Urus exists. It's like the escalation that Commissioner Gordon mentions at the end of Batman Begins.
This matches the house design choices that the super wealthy make. It’s brilliantly targeted.
Speaking of brilliant, your observation - spot-on.
i just feel like people would rather own g wagon
@@charles_.lthe people who buy this don't want a g wagen because all their friends have one already.
@@charles_.ldime a dozen
well, yeah, it has to appeal to them, it's an LA car for sure, I doubt these get a 2nd year run.
"Plan your next trip to Illinois today" with the shaving cheese onto a pizza had me dying 🤣
Also, the E72 X6 ActiveHybrid was BMW's first experiment with doing exactly this mix of a turbo V8 with a electric hybrid drivetrain that mated to the transmission.
My neighbors leased one years ago. I’m not sure if they enjoyed it. However, I believe this powertrain was designed from the ground up. Like Jack said, this vehicle will be the field tester for eventual TSBs in future M products.
When the scene with the guy making pizza came and went, I actually said out loud “what the fuck was that” and I’m glad it happened.
Mark and Jack, laughter my head off at this review / philosophical debate. If I may but in, I would say decadence dosent know logic, rationality or prudence. Keep up the good work👍🏻
The reason this channel is great is because it’s real. They don’t make every car seem like the best thing in the world and highlight both the flaws and what’s great unlike others
That roof looks like when a 90s chevy headliner starts sagging in places.
It seems like this vehicle is the best representation of Neo-M-ism. Put the M badge on everything!
It really is.
It'd work better as a BMW flagship rather than M. That way they could give it a good ride and gone all out on luxury. I'd still hate it, but it'd make more sense to me.
Yeah I drive an f22 m235i and even there the m is a bit of a watering down. Even as a performance car.
If you put in the work tuning your cars in Gran Turismo you should handle the BMW driving dynamics interface just fine.
Looking forward to your review of the BMW X M Red Label, where they *quite literally* put lipstick on a pig.
Holy shit.. that's amazing
that's an insult against pigs.
Really tired of how words don’t mean things these days. Literally , is not a word that’s meant to be used figuratively 😅. This vehicle is not literally a pig… is it pig like yes but it is not LITERALLY a pig. You mean figuratively omg.
@@LafemmebearMusic is a fictional Angry Bird pig literally a pig or figuratively? Maybe virtually
@@LafemmebearMusic Look at bearboy over hear, loosing his mind.
The models on the runway b-roll was hilarious, well done.
This is such a cynical episode… and it’s mainly because you’re absolutely right. It’s hard to look into the future of automobiles and not be somewhat depressed, especially at the top of the market.
There's a new M5 in my area which appears to have that similar shade of blue, it's fantastic with the copper accents. That's all I have to say about the XM!
Hopefully one day Jack can give us an in depth video on the B58 and all its iterations the same way you do for cars like the NSX
I love you Mark, never change 🤣
The XM is a performance car that uses the other definition of performance. It's not about what it can do but about being seen in one. This is as car that was designed from the ground up to be either a prop in, or the setting of, Instagram posts. The majority of the content with this vehicle in it will be the steering wheel or dashboard with random motivational quotes about money or hustling/grinding
I love the nice gentle touch of playing Slav King in such a car. Definitely the same target group as the car buyer, perfection.
Wait
I know the song but it’s not in the video?
@@intensifiedhipster th-cam.com/video/qAFgpxAxV5o/w-d-xo.htmlsi=erylgN-0GLZ6oRgQ&t=223
I really love the curve in the centre of the dash with a totally square iPad slapped on there.
Even pursuing it on purpose, it is impossible to make an uglier car.
Hold your beer - there many new models coming out uglier or worse....boring
@@bavariancarenthusiast2722 😵💫
Yeah all cars should just be aerodynamic economy blobs or gigantic apartment buildings on wheels. Nothing else. How dare BMW do something different.
The Fiat Multipla is more endearing than this thing.
@@JohnFromAccounting hey don't insult the Multipla its an icon now 😅
tall, extremely heavy (over 6000lbs), very fast (700hp) and in the hands of the target demographic. This is car is going to be dangerous to everyone but the person driving it
That blue color is VERY nice. There is an M550i XDrive on Turo near LA with the identical blue color + copper trim. Rented it a handful of times, gets a lots stares for a 5 series
Glad Mark recovered from Hyperscreen of the EQS quickly! Keep being resilient Mark! Transfer your consciousness to AI by the way, Jack!
I like the new guy. He's really insightful.
What are the other videos where these B58 introductions were made as well? 😆
I think we all owe the Pontiac Aztek an apology because this thing makes it look like a brilliant piece of automotive art.
It’s incredible to think that the Pontiac Aztek looks like a sound investment in comparison. Even new, they weren’t going to completely bankrupt you as long as you didn’t think about the papier-mâché transmission.
10/10 that cracked me up, bang on
The first video I ever watched of yours I couldn’t finish. No reflection on your videos. You guys are the best.
I hosted a party on Saturday where I made everyone watch a compilation of AI Jack clips without any context. No one has spoken to me since and I think someone took my cat when they left that night.
Great work as always.
For people looking in a few years to buy one coming off lease, this thing might set a record for depreciation. I'm very curious what they sell for after 30-something thousand miles.
Yes your right! Normal people might be able to afford it...at least until the first check engine light comes on.
Considering the amount of rattles that things gonna have in 5 years time from the horrible ride, I'd say 50% of RRP
@@timothycc711At 30K miles the check engine light will have already been on for a while.
1/3 the starting price.
This vehicle just shows how lost BMW M has been for years. You guys touch on this in the video but this soulless vapid BS is the opposite of what BMW M used to stand for years ago. What a sad world.
You guys are so well positioned to give a hilarious commentary on a thing like this, and you absolutely nailed it 😂😂😂
The real business case for the XM is so 50,000 of you can convince Dave Ramsey that the b58 x3m40i is an optimal bargain.
"Lets start with the exterior...oof!"
Thanks. The Roblox death sound now plays in my head whenever I see this truck.
Is this really, truely the same company that made the 507, E46 M3 and Z8🤔
Nope. That company died a long time ago.
BMW: We will never make a BMW X7M, it would be too big and expensive.
Also BMW: *builds this monstrosity*
Video edits like this is partly why you guys are my favorite car review channel.. absolutely love the comedy and style of the vid. The AI stuff is def funny but for me sometimes it gets overplayed and a bit too weird lol this one was hysterical but yeah just giving inputs. Keep up the great work, happy 4th 😎
romanian gypsies will absolutely love this car. but then again they've always loved BMWs.
Loved the ambient lighting in the shop segment 😆
Only you two can speak the honest opinion on brand like BMW and not be uninvited to the next review. Appreciate the honesty
1:20 in and I spit my coffee out laughing at the cheese grating 😂😂. Well done men.
I wonder if they ever run these designs through existing BMW customers. It looks as if they are giving the finger to their existing enthusiast/ fan base and trying to get a completely new one.
Sadly, controversy and contrariness (for no other reason and without merit) sells.
Sure, in the long term that will kill the brand
good point, people with TASTE like x3's and x5's, the x3m40i is a really nice modern BMW for sure, I really do like them, and I think those are German made, but maybe not.
Hopefully one day we get back to efficient, very aerodynamic, sedan like, low consumption vehicles. This whole trend of SUVs is ingnoring everything we learned in the last 60 years of automotive development.
I mean there are still a LOT of sedans and little hatch backs sold every year
Mercedes EQS? Ioniq 6? And of course: Toyota Prius, Honda Clarity (discontinued) etc. One day buyers will see the light and prioritise buying vehicles with low drag coefficient, one hopes. 🙂
I'd like to see more luxury vehicles that prioritize efficiency, luxury doesn't necessarily need to be an excess in size.
You had me at geodesic headliner and underbody mood lighting. I have (2) on order.
The last time i saw something this fashionable it was called ‘Derelict’
Actually it was "Derelicte."
"I'll derelicte your balls" 😂😂
@@erik2446 yeah sorry its been a while. awesome movie though and the first thing that came to mind when i saw the TV ad for that car
@@KevGoesRiding 🤣
This is basically the modern equilviant of some tarted up 70s shag van with the decorations.
11:30 the fake engine noise sounds like a cow mooing
Your channel is one of the first regular one to have HDR content. Hats off to you for actually properly using the format. The colorgrading and use of dynamic range is excellent! The highligts reallly pop on my oled laptopscreen.TH-cam has rarely looked this good.
I get why they did it..this is for Movie Stars and Athletes. Not sure it had to be an M car though... They should have spun off a brand like Maybach and Mercedes
Imagine if they used the Alpina name
@@mtnman1984oh God...
Well its bold and different....at least....
@@mtnman1984 Alpina is a partner, they don't own them. Should they buy them ?.. maybe..
@@joellarrysr9977 their acquisition of Alpina was announced last year, but I don't know when it's supposed to be finalized.
LMAO! I loved this so much!! Thank you!! Also, +1 for the "turboCHARGER" moment...
17:40 RIGHT THERE!! completely agree with Mark. hense why i can't stand alot of new vehicles that fall into this category. it truly is a waste of resources.
Thanks!
Great video and I love the “hate flooring” you were doing with it. It deserves the hate and BMW should be embarrassed that they green lit this disaster.
Can’t imagine owning this after warranty expires
yeah, it can not be done, will maybe have a 2nd owner....but doubt it.
Watching you drive that thing down the road almost shook my retinas loose. It's crazy to see a smoother ride and less camera shake in your GT3RS video than this (granted that was on track).
A salt of the earth review of BMW' vanity'wood. A+ guys 👍
Do you have to pay a monthly subscription for the turbocharger?
My local dealer had 6 in stock last month. Went over the weekend just to browse and they were all gone. Apparently there’s definitely a market for these.
Former 80's yuppies who have suddenly become very rich now !
I`m sure, Pontiac sold more than 6 Aztecs.
@@michaelv6870 at 25k new, the Aztec was attainable for the majority of the population….the XM, not so much.
L o l. One of the most spicy reviews from our guys in a long long time. Agreed though...not a car for almost most people and it's a testament to potentially wasted development funds that could have gone into a sports car or just something else.
I was driving my E30 in Chicago the other day and I saw one of these, I was mortified when I looked over at it.
My wife said the interior, particularly the ambient lighting, reminded her of a downtempo club in New York. And I think that is exactly what BMW is aiming for here. You buy this for the same reason you buy a Michael Jordan athletic shoe.
modern cars are disgusting because the ''ambient'' lighting is OBNOXIOUS, the new e class is like a night club, its no longer a luxury car.
Saw one in real life for the first time.
It literally has the presence for a second then I couldn't care less.
I saw one in the city last week. The owner looked like chiselled turd.
I'm guessing a big part of the appeal of this car is that it makes boomers angry. Kind of like "you ruined our future, now we will ruin the things you love" type of deal.
Persian real estate moguls in Toronto and LA will be fighting to the death to get their hands on these
18:20 Excellent points. With BMW being the builder of "ultimate driving machines" the relative lack of exotic mid-engine supercars in their lineup is totally illogical.
Several years ago I submitted a design idea to t-shirt company blipshift. It was the BMW M logo with the words Past: Motorsport, Present: Meh, Future: Marketing. They didn’t accept it. 😅 The disgusted look on Mark’s face throughout the entire review says it all…
My backside hurts after watching this. Thanks guys...
Wat da fak were they thinking when they designed this thing??
Been into BMWs for the last 20 years. I've been fortunate enough to drive 3 series 5 series and 7 series. I have owned X5Ms and X6Ms in 2022 and 2023. I just picked up an XM a few weeks ago. I have managed to drive it around 2000 Miles. The car is amazing in every aspect. My commute into the city is 60 miles each way and my roads are very good. I find the car very comfortable, incredibly responsive and solid and safe in speeds in excess of 125mph. I typically really don't care about gas mileage but already I am seeing 21 mpg. These guys need to spend a lot more time behind the wheel of this masterpiece to then conclude that it is not worth it. Anyone who is an enthusiast and is contemplating this vehicle should test drive this vehicle for a few hours and take it on different types of roads. I do not agree with there negative comments at all. Thank you for your time.
Great review, although I'm sensing some missed opportunities here. I'm having visions of Wham's "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" soundtrack playing with the opening shots of the XM, followed by a reenactment by Jack and Mark of the gasoline fight scene from Zoolander?
Glad to see the glass roof gone and something interesting done with the headliner.
Early signs indicate this car is going to be a sales flop, which is really satisfying. They're sitting on dealer lots with discoutns already, unprecedented for a new car in 2023.
I would not take one for 40k, not at all.
I loved BMW for the daring I3 and I8. Now I don't which is worse, this XM or their anniversary "CSL" 😢.