My Aunt Is Financially Abusing Her 16 Year Old Daughter
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My mother did this to me on
Multiple occasions and I finally filed a police report and got that mess off of my credit. My family was mad but I set a new standard for myself and my mom
What you did was necessary or your life was ruined. It is really sad your family could not see this and sided with the side of what was wrong instead of what was right. I have never understood this type of herd mentality.
Good for you. Sometimes it takes strong actions to send the message. And you didn’t put her in that position, she did. Your family can go stuff themselves if they can’t see what she did was wrong and what you did was right.
Good! Good for you
Good for you! Your family should have been mad at your mom, not you.
Tell your siblings, that mum should use their credit card, instead of yours. Also ask if they are offering
Criminal. I say she needs to go to jail period. She had her chance. Too late. Call the cops.
Amen!
@@r.h.6402 What's sick is saddling someone else against their will with your debt. It's theft and it's fraud. Doing it to your own kid is absolutely heartless and if you think a good talking to would end it you are naive. I can see only two ways to make it stop. Call the cops or dig a whole out in the desert. Pressing charges is the kinder of the two
But what happens to the kid? Is the cousin gonna take her in?
If the aunt has the audacity to put credit cards and write checks in her daughter name, its safe to assume she have a few utility bills as well...better look into that.
My 24 year old stepdaughter recently discovered a 15 year old car loan on her credit. The question is, mom or dad( my ex) who did it? You wouldn't believe how hard they fought to take that off her credit
@@elainep8873 People who do this to their adult children, nieces, etc, are freaking awful...it's unforgivable.
@@elainep8873 report it as fraud.
@Elaine P
.....I could be a random stranger. SSN numbers are generated systematically based on the state they were issued in and the year they were issued.
If you know approximately the number of baby’s born in a state in a given year it’s pretty easy to fairly accurately generate a few hundred to a few thousand valid SNN’s in a single go.
When you combine that with the fact some banks and credit brokers were notoriously bad at cross checking SSN’s with the names and birth dates they were supposed to be associated with. There used to be a pretty common scam where criminals would take the SSN’s of children who didn’t have a credit history yet and use a fake name and birthdate and open up credit cards and other loans In their names then run off with the money.
Of course this is not the case anymore there is much more regulation around credit than there was pre 2009 and you can’t do this anymore (well there is probably someone smarter than me out there who is evil that has figured something out but not this exact scam) but it effected many children from my understanding. Also from what I read when this scam was uncovered they specifically targeted people from low population, low income states to decrease the odds that anyone would connect the dots.
But I could also be remembering some of this wrong so...
It's easier than Dave said. Call Child Protective Services. They'll investigate and if allegations are confirmed, refer it to the police. And you don't have to upset the family.
the anonymous child protective services calls usually does do the trick.
Good idea
And what happens to the girl? Foster care sucks!
Foster care is usually more dangerous than the original home environment.
These adults are scared to death of doing what's right
Its pathetic
It always amazes me how apprehensive people are to turn in family members for financial frauds. It reminds me of the mom whose daughter stolen 80k from her business and they had not even fired her when they called Dave.
ahastar1141 ya, I remember that call. Insane.
I remember that call, too. I remember Dave saying she would be off the property immediately. She stole all that money, but they couldn’t fire her because no one else could do her job. Insane, keeping an embezzler employed because they couldn’t find a replacement right away.
In this case, the daughter is a minor, an only child, no father around, and aunts and uncles who barely speak to each other and live out of state. Everything isn't so cut and dry.
@@lovethemflowers That's what temp agencies are for -- to supply workers to suddenly fill in!!
Call the police. Aunt was already warned.
This caller wanted advice on how to convince the aunt to stop, but the time for that has passed. She needs to call the cops. Stop pretending the aunt will change, she won't.
Bryan Jacobs This aunt will not change. Dave should have said: Tell your cousin to run a credit check on herself. Then she could see the fraud, put fraud alert on her credit and begin disassembling the mess, address the debt already piled up in her name which, of course, will never be paid off by her mother, and try to figure out whether to file charges against her mother.
“DO NOT PASS GO, GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL!”
I love this man.
My mom did similar things by telling me she opened a joint checking with me for my first job. Turns out I was just signing over checks to her in her personal account the whole time. There never was a joint account. It really does affect the way you view your family, your self and your finances... I am working on my own bad habit formed from that experience. I basically believed that I need to "spend it before anyone can take it from you", and that mindset isn't going to help me save and grow as an adult now. I have goals, I'm engaged and I want the best life for myself, my soon to be husband and our future family and that's why I love listening to Dave. Thanks for another educational video!
K. Kr I've been there.
A Benavidez Idk what terrible thing happened to you to make you say WHEN my spouse and I (strangers to you) will get divorced, but you obviously don't know either of us. And I know the vast difference between MY money and other people's money. I used to spend MY money, now I put MY income towards OUR goals as a future family and I appreciate the positive and motivating messages that Dave puts out into the world. Your comments on the other hand, are unnecessarily negative. Hopefully you can learn something from Dave Ramsey as well.
+K. Kr AMEN, well said & BEST WISHES on you & your hubbys union!!!
Did you report your mom? Do you still talk to your mom? Etc
Same
This is wrong in so many levels. Your supposed to help children build wealth and better they're future not dig a hole for them that they won't be able to get out off. 🤔
Real talk!!!! 💯💯💯💯
Sadly there are parents out there that see their children as financial safety nets. They don't raise them with the intention of helping them as a HUMAN BEING, but rather as an asset. It's like those moms that acquire child support so she doesn't have to work and spend on whatever she wants. There needs to be laws on protecting kids from parents besides going directly to Child Protection Services. There should be mandatory parent responsibility education classes or SOMETHING for all people wanting to be parents or some screener or SOMETHING- sounds annoying but obviously the caring parents will likely prevail, those who don't have the heart are less likely to succeed.
@@SwanPrncss yeah, my mom told me she had kids late in life (she had me at 40) so as soon as we were old enough to support ourselves, we'd be old enough to support her. She had a ton of stipulations too, and emotionally and financially blackmailed us into always being stuck at home living with her. I've never been able to save living under her roof because 90% of my paycheck was going to her. She would pay many of my bills too, but she also racked them up too. $65,000 in student loans because she would NOT have a daughter that did not have a bachelor's degree from a high ranking college, and $30,000 in credit cards. I also have ridiculous interest rates because she literally walked me into the bank to get an immediate cash advance to get enough money for her to buy her home.
For the past year and a half, I've lived with a family friend and then taking care of utilities, the home association fees, and all my bills my mom once paid, plus I now own my own car. While tight, it's been less financially stressful than it was living with my mom. Sadly, I can't afford actual rent on my own and I can stay at the family friend's home anymore. I'm moving back home with my mom, and I'm terrified. She now wants me to apply for a master's degree when I get back, and I just don't want more debt. I want to pay some stuff off first, but she knows the more I pay off the more likely I'll leave again and she doesn't want that.
I'm just trying to build a barrier and block her from knowing anything moneywise with me. So I can save up, pay off, move out, and then get my master's. I terrifying though...
natalia portal do not go back
@@nataliaportal5346 Get a roommate as opposed to moving back in with your Mom.
My mother did this to me too. It took me 14 years to fix it. Somebody should have done something when I was a kid. It made my life so much harder than it needed to be. It has a life long impact when you turn 18 and you are instantly thrown into poverty weighted down by debt that you can't even hope to pay.
“You need to go hurt her feelings...Soon!” -Me dealing with all my problems
Dave is a mood. 😂😂
You can't make idle threats to this woman. Your other relative told her she was going to the police, and she didn't stop. Well? Now, it's time to follow through on what was said. Otherwise, your aunt is just going to continue doing this, which is hurting your young cousin.
Years ago when you could purchase your own chat rooms my sister used my credit card to buy one. I was in college at the time and renting a room in her home. She knew I would leave my credit card at home in my drawer just so I won’t be tempted to use it. Anyway about 2 weeks later she bought some music from apple and because the card was connected to my iTunes the songs automatically appeared in my purchased list. I was so confused because I hardly purchased music on apple back then I mostly bought cds. When I got home and logged into my credit card account I saw the 2 purchases and immediately cancelled my card. Went to check my drawer to see if it was there and it was so I thought someone stole my identity. I canceled my debit card as well and changed both my bank account numbers. Fast forward about 2 days later she went to use my card and it wasn’t working so she came to ask me what happened to my credit card (the audacity), when I told her I think someone stole my identity because there were charges on my card that I didn’t make she started laughing and said oh that was me. Anyways after the new cards came I kept them with me at all times and made sure to shred all of my bank statements for good measure. She had the nerve sometime after to ask me for the number and after saying no I moved out. I just couldn’t deal with that nonsense anymore
Good on you. Sorry to hear that. Hope your sister gets her head straight.
Credit card company also has a hand in this, they make it too easy to open the cards in someone else's name.
It’s not their job to make people behave.
Well only the parents know the kids social security numbers. You have to have that to open a card
Lol do explain that!
Give her dagum bracelets that connect
David 😂
Dave's a poet. Amazing that he pulled that idiom out of his hat.
Came here for this comment 😭😭😭
Rebekah H. Huh??
🙌😂
The family won't do anything. She'll hang up and forget the whole conversation. When Dave asked her, "Would you step in if she were beating her child???" the woman had to pause and think about it 😒😔
Unfortunately this happens a LOT.
Sad & true... folks think 'they are some how getting over' vs. creating a hole so big the young adult has to try to dig out of OR the cycle just continues... sad. 😞
LGnLA I don’t think they are trying to get over it seems to me that they are either desperate because they have ruined their own credit and “need” certain things like utilities or they are miserable people who don’t like themselves and don’t care how they treat others, even their children, usually because they themselves have been used and treated poorly. It is a vicious cycle.
Merci Beaucoup I agree but unfortunately most kids don’t even know until they try to purchase something that requires pulling their credit.
Yes, it happened to my husband too so sad
Why do i think she is going to let this go under the bridge
This just made me open my eyes to see how blessed I am with a mother who has an enormously high level of integrity, love and financial discipline. This would be unthinkable in my family. Thank you Jesus, thank you mom. 🙏🙏🙏
not rly the time for u to be feeling yourself bud... read the room
what a scam artist. The caller sounds disappointed about her mom confronting the aunt. I wonder why. Is her mom a weak person re. this sister or non confrontational? Its the innocent cousin who will have to face a harsh reality
They thought Ramsey would give her some non lethal magic pill to stop the abuse. And when he told her there's no other way than jail, it just something she thought she could avoid. This is what happens when you teach your children to be passive aggressive
Shes a doormat
Her cousin has a mother who is stealing from her. Ramsey's call is put the mother in jail. Who takes care of the cousin? Do they? Do they have the means to do so? Does she go into foster care? What's the next step? These are questions the caller should've asked.
Even if the aunt does close the accounts & never do this again, the damage is done. She doesn't have the money to pay off the debts. The daughter is going to inherit all of this when she turns 18 (or sooner, since the credit bureaus think she already has). The only way to get this sorted out involves the police: call them now.
Even though this comment is a year old, I will say that all the items on the report that was reported fraudulently can be undone before or after turning 18. It would be obvious to the credit reporting agencies that she was underage when the account were opened so they would remove them. A police report would be needed though but it can be done.
The caller sounded like she really didn't want to....So why call and ask for advice?
You can report them. She is committing credit card fraud and identity theft. Why is her niece laughing when dave says call the cops? She's going to continue doing it.
It's nervous laughter. Nobody wants to contemplate calling the cops on a relative.
It's nerves she doesn't think it's funny
I don't think she was laughing. I did not hear her laugh!
The daughter is only 16? I live in Michigan and my 16 year old daughter can't even have a savings account in only her name, a bank debit card, nothing until age 18.
This is clearly fraud and needs to be treated as such
Why is this even a question?!?! Call the cops. Ridiculous!
Time to get law enforcement involved. Protect that child!
Take her to the cops! My dad always told me "I don't make threats, I make promises."
How is it legal to even give credit to a minor? There’s no reasonable expectation of financial stability
You are right, Leslie is lying.
@@Apollyon-sz9sn it's possible.
Who says she gave a legit age of her daughter? 😂
Banks want credit card customers so badly, that's why!!
Call the police! This is fraud and will affect your cousin’s life. It’s abuse. It’s illegal!
What’s so annoying is when they call in for advice and make excuses I.e. she won’t listen. Well why did you call?!! 🤨
Someone should really step up - the fact that there was even a QUESTION about the aunt's "feelings" is ludacris! The woman belongs in jail!
Hahaha, we told her we'd call the cops if she didn't stop, she didn't stop..... What should we do?
If it was any of my family I don't care if it was my mom they would be in jail because when family does that don't need them
I feel sorry for the teen. There is a way out! ❤️ It happened to me when growing up: When I was 18, I moved out and stayed with friends. I was able to work on clearing the fraudulent bills before living on my own. I contacted the utility companies and provided my birth certificate to show my age to prove I was 13 at the time the accounts were active. My birth cert. also showed my mother's SSN# so they were able to go after her. My name was then cleared.
I like watching Dave because its like watching Dr. Phil he tells the people how it is and is blunt and real I love it!! It helps me with my confidence.
Many jobs won't even hire you with really bad credit. Thus is sooo wrong!
I feel like I might cry. Report that aunt to the authorities
Send mommy to jail and raise this child right.
“Give her some dadgum bracelets that connect!”🤣😂🤣😂
Joanne The Scammer type auntie 😥😂😂
it's illegal, stolen identity.
The caller's tone of voice is apathetic. No backbone, she will do nothing.
Do these callers get their mics cut off at some point in the conversation? I often hear Dave go on his rants with no responses from the callers.
ScentJunkie03 Dave hits the mute button, and you see him do it often with that device on the desk.
Joe B That's what I thought. Thanks!
Most of these clips would be 25 minutes long if he didnt
He likes to hear himself talk.
Problem is if Aunt goes to jail, what happens to her cousin?
Either she becomes a ward of the state or, due to the existence of relatives, more likely the girl who was calling's mother becomes her legal guardian.
Her foster parents wont be able to steal her identity and she wont turn 18 with her life already ruined.
Woooooow. What a terrible mother.
CPS
john hodg
1 second ago
Dave you said that her sister should be standing up to tell her sister. but whats wrong with the person that tells you about this , so at least it will stop there. Why make her sister tell her to stop. I think whoever sees this happen should phone the cops and let them handle this. And forget about her sister.
My ex stole my and his son’s identity and even put a DUI under his social! Only saving grace for my son is the 25 year difference in age.
My dad did this to me. Luckily it was just a cable when I was 15 and we are in Texas. It's been 15 years since that time so it's long gone with as Texas is a debtor friendly state. He also put cell phones in my younger brothers name and drained grandmother of everything she had and was worth withought her knowledge.
DAVE IS CALLING THE COPS ON EVERYBODY. 👏👏👏
You would never believe how common this is. I used to work as a bill collector and I would have to be the one to break the news to a lot of these people that their parents stole their identity. Its bizarre to listen to someone lose all respect for their parents within a few seconds. Crushing.
The caller acts so hopeless and like a victim. "There's no solution, it's all sad, I don't know what to do..."
Its hard emotionally to report on our own relatives despite their abuse. It takes lot of emotional energy.
These videos are really depressing sometimes
This kid won't qualify for student loans, which the kid will clearly need to do since the mother is broke!
My mother just beat me. Luckily, not financially, which can actually be worse.
"give her some bracelets that connect." I gotta use that one.
Simply call Child Protective Services and you don't have to identify yourself. They are required to investigate any allegations of abuse, whether it's physical, emotional, mental, or financial.
What about her grandmother or grandfather (someone older)?
it's not ok but guess what, it happens all the time. happened to me too. you never really recover.
My mom did that. She ran up a 2500 dollar cable bill and let it go to collections without telling me.
How can you take out credit cards in a 16 year olds name? Don’t you have to be age of majority?
anybody can lie about any age and get a credit card. i have an x rooamte took out credit cards in her 5 year old daughter and her x houseband as well and her x had to handle it.
Yep yep.... my mom did it to me, I had a jc penny account on my credit that was opened when I was 2 years old... but it had my mom's birthday on it... just my ssn....
If mom doesn’t go to jail the daughter will end up in jail for bounced checks etc...
Dude O just started whatching a lot of these common sense videos THEY ARE AWSOMEEEEE!!! Love that Ramsey includes Jesus Christ in everything and speaks truth through common sense!!!
This happened to me too, my father died and mother spent the money meant for my brother and I till there was nothing left.
In this case, the daughter is a minor, an only child, no father around, and aunts and uncles who barely speak to each other and live out of state. Everything isn't so simple as call the cops. Even if Mom only receives probation, can you imagine her and her daughters relationship under the same roof?
Twana H But the thing is that the relationship is not there to begin with. There is abuse...
@@Lenysea I didn't say a HEALTHY relationship but there is A relationship... and it'll only get worse.
i found out my cousin stole my aunts social and and forged her signature on student loans.. i told her brother, my grandfather and he told me i was destroying the family..he told me i had no right to be upset because thats his family not mine.... yes this is my biological grandfather..it was his other brothers kid. i was so disgusted
My question is: why is it possible for a 16 YEAR OLD to get a credit card at all?!
I'm watching this from Ireland.... How are people able to do this? When someone does these transactions don't they have to give their date of birth? I mean, it's not legal to sign a legal contract until your 18 so how do these children then get saddled with debt? Surely, in a few years, when it's followed up, it becomes clear the child was too young to sign anything legally. Credit is far too easy to get in America.. Perhaps it's what made the country so dynamic in the 20th century, but it's sinking it in the 21st!!
This isn't money advice it's dear Abby
Dave Ramsey for President!!!!!
Dave is very insightful when it comes to female dynamics within families
Call the cops on her...If she's willing to do this to her own child, it's already too late. Identity theft is a crime. 🤬🤬🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♀️🤦♀️
I find it difficult to get my head around some of the things I'm hearing and reading. America has really put itself on the map !! I'm British and we don't have this kind of stuff.
@Sponge Bob And why did we do it? We were being financially abused by our parent country!
The accounts are invalid anyway as the child is a minor so she can not be held liable - minors can not sign contracts
Nope! I would confront my aunt! Period! At the same time, I’m vocal and I would make sure her social security number gets blocked from any kind of credit checks.
Ugh! I don’t understand why parents do stuff like this. My parents never did stuff like this but I was a tough child. I didn’t play games like that anyway. Everyone would be going to jail, including the dog!
Credit is very important because everyone checks credit report from jobs to apartment complexes. So I hope this girls family members help her when she turns 18 because this little girl isn't going to be able to get her first apartment unless it's in a bad neighborhood with a slum Lord.
How would she know if her aunt did or did not do this again if her aunt didn't tell anyone and hid her future activities?
this callers annoying....she doesn't seem all there in the head...
My mother did this to me too. So wrong.
This is wrong what she is doing and illegal! Intervention now!
Parents like this are selfish
Call the police this can be very bad for your cousin when she turns 18 and tries to open her own accounts, buy car or renters insurance, or get a job.
I thought u can’t start building credit until 18 years old.
There’s ways to build and definitely ways to ruin it before 18. It’s so sad how often this happens. I heard other people having this issue and never thought I’d know someone close to me but it happened to my best friend by her mom and to my sister.
The kid will find out eventually. Why is she doing this? Living beyond her means, just doesn't have enough income to meet basic needs, etc? There are all kinds of help these days funded by the taxpayers and administered by the govt. My guess is her means aren't enough to meet her wants - that's usually the cause.
I have to keep an eye out, as well. My mother has become very narcissistic. But, she asked for my SS # in order to add me to a POD (payable on death) for her accounts at her bank. I called her bank and they confirmed that they do have that, but I informed them that I was unsure about providing her with my SS# because things had gotten “weird”. They understood what I meant as it, “apparently, happens often, that a parent will take advantage of and commit financial abuse against a child. I’ll be watching my credit though. It was bad enough many years ago that, because my sister’s name is so similar to mine, I had to prove I wasn’t her to start an account with the phone company.
And, yes, most might say that I was stupid to provide her with my SS#. But, as I know I may never fully recover from the recession, I cannot afford to give up anything that may be left me and have it all go to my sister. Just a reality for me.
This isn't easy but I think the family needs to get her to stop first. And if she doesn't then they should take legal action & turn her in. They need to prepare to take care of the 16 year old and prepare her mentally that her mom will be in jail. So sad.
I feel like this lady didn't actually want to hear what Ramsay was saying. I'd even go so far as to say she sounded like she wants a handout herself to cover the debt...... But props to her if she's the only one in the family with a conscience (Y)
My mother is one of 5 girls and 1 boy and it’s a pretty insane family they are all each worth well over 5 mil from a little bit of family money and hard work buuuuut when they were in their 20s one sister kept stealing the other siblings identities to put bills in their names including my mother and put her a few thousand in debt while she was going through law school. She threatened to get police involved and her sister ended up paying her back. Just because it’s family doesn’t mean they can do bad things to you and get away with it
dam this is so bad my mum saved up for me and my sister so when i was 17 we got £1400 each and she was a single parent most of my child hood i suspect the aunt was a smoker or a drinker or both
The aunt has a spending adeiction, substance addiction, or she is just evil. Not sure, but there is no excuse for this. What is wrong with the Mom for not going after her sister, the Aunt?
These kind people want to control people with a feather rather that a club. Sometimes a club is not enough, a feather is hardly ever effective. A door has to be wide open for people to see the light.
Why do ao many parents do this? This is so crazy to me. Isn't this a felony? I don't get how you can do this to your own child. Insane.
This 16 yr old kid will also need legal help in getting this resolved. Hopefully her extended family can help her.
People laugh when he says call the cops its the only thing you can do unless you are gonna beat some sense into them, and I doubt listeners here are taking that option.
Terrible
Not worth talking to the Aunt. File a police report immediately!
It’s sad that society cares more about physical abuse than they do about financial or emotional abuse
"She's @*&^*#*# her own kid...." What Ramsey!?!
She needs to go to jail. The only confrontation she needs is with the criminal court system.
YUK ! Amazing what people can rationalize for their own gain. So sad.