"Baddassfully: What the hell is going on here? Are you sleeping with my sister?" "Slumber would be difficult due to the energetic nature of our copulation" LOL
Fun facts: Blasto and the rest of the Hanar, all the Vorcha, and many Volus, are voiced by Mark Meer, aka Male Shepard. The horny female elcor is voiced by Jennifer Hale aka FemShep.
@@enigma647 I imagine hanar have no reason to leave the Prothean "heaven", and they had no idea what to do with elcor and volus in Andromeda. And of course the amount of setbacks that game had on top of everything, in between crunch, losing devs for Anthem (which wasn't even in production, no joke, until months before release) and EA forcing them to use Frostbite. Oh and not having the main team in between some leaving and others being held in Anthem.
So Blasto is voiced by Mark Meer and Polyp is voiced by Jennifer Hale. This means that Shepard is the only being in the Galaxy who has screwed him/herself. My God . . . does Shepard's depravity know no bounds?
I just stumbled upon this today. I must have played this game 5-6 times now from start to finish, and I'm still finding new stuff. This thing is the greatest thing ever. All I have to say is Bubin brings new meaning to being a total badass.
Would this use the Mass Effect 3 engine? Because now I'm just imagining a hanar doing combat rolls. ... Somehow it works. However an elcor doing combat rolls does not. Also, what would a hanar's armour look like?
Bubin's dialogue is even more hilarious when you realize its flat voice is channeling Sylvester Stallone, instead of being deliberately monotone like other elcor.
9:03 Another extremely rare instance of female Elcor dialogue in Mass Effect, the first one being in a Elcor Hamlet ad in the Citadel in Mass Effect 2.
I know I’m 9 years late to the party, but one day I’m absolutely going to use the line “Did a Prothean descend from heaven? Because this one would enjoy enkindling that”. Single greatest pickup line I’ve ever heard 🤣.
After reading the list of all fictional movies in ME universe... man, I would love to see some of them: Blasto (of course), Ruck Humpers, Teenage Ninja Kwanzaa Force, Make It Look Real: The Lili T'Nigus Story, She's a Keeper, The 840-Year-Old Virgin, Call Me Sally to name a few, also Off Stage seems like a good movie.
Full transcript. Damn it, Blasto, I told you to bring in those vorcha alive for questioning. This one didn’t have anything to ask them. You blew up half a level of Zakera Ward. It was an aesthetically displeasing habitat anyway. You don’t get it, Kahje-Clan. Ever since they found eezo on the vorcha homeworld, the Council’s been trying to make nice. Bottom line, you can’t touch the vorcha. They’ve got diplomatic immunity. Then this one will not attempt diplomacy. You’re also getting a new partner. Are you engaging with reproductive behavior with this one? Unless you want your Spectre status revoked, you’re working in a joint operation with Bubin from C-Sec. An elcor? You know this one works alone. Look, I’ve had to talk them down from suspending you. I’ve gotten a pulmonary ulcer from dealing with this mess. I can’t even eat solid food! You would benefit from shedding excess body mass, Chief. - Greetings, Bubin. This one understands you are the second best law enforcement agent on the Citadel. Badassfully: Funny. I heard the same thing about you. Just avoid interfering with this one’s projected maneuvering path. Badassfully: Hold it, Spectre. We do this by the book. You may carry the book while this one opens another excretion vent on the vorcha ambassador. Badassfully: Damn it, you big stupid jellyfish. I’m just three solar days from retirement. Obtain a firm grip on your reproductive anatomy. The vorcha ambassador’s vehicle just turned down that skyway. Badassfully: What the hell are you doing. This is my mate’s car. We just paid it off. Hopefully you are insured. - Greetings, vorcha citizen. Please explain the reason for your haste. You no touch me! Diplomatic immun- Ow! Ow! Ow! Please exercise caution, criminal scum. Your face may cause damage to my partner’s vehicle. Badassfully: Hey, you’re hurting him. His unique genetic structure will enable him to regenerate… unless this one uses fire. No talk, no talk! This one has forgotten whether its pistol is currently equipped with incendiary ammunition. Does the criminal scum consider itself fortunate? Badassfully: You’d better talk. I can’t hold him back. Consort! Guarding boss at consort! Have a pleasant day. Badassfully: Damn it, what the hell was that. You’re out of control. You may wish to monitor your stress levels. High blood pressure is unhealthy for a species adapted to a high-gravity environment. Badassfully: Come on, I know someone at the Consort’s office. This one suspected you had deviant mating fetishes. Badassfully: You are paying for the car. - Coquettishly: Welcome to the Consort’s suites. Oh, Bubin, it’s great to see you. Has a Prothean descended from heaven? Because this one would enjoy enkindling that. Badassfully: Hey, man, that’s my sister. Your progenitors’ genetic propensity for attractiveness was passed only to her. Coquettishly: Who’s the big handsome jellyfish, Bubin? Blasto. This one is training Bubin in proper legal procedure. Badassfully: Listen, Honey, we need to get inside. Coquettishly: You’re a pain, Bubin. But I can’t resist your good-looking partner. Thank you, polyp. This one will attempt to determine a way to repay you. Badassfully: Seriously, don’t be like that with my sister. - reetings, vorcha scum. This one mistook you for a krogan defecation. You no talk! Me get your badge! Badassfully: That badge is the only thing keeping him from killing you right now. You be sorry! This one is already story. It will take hours to remove your olfactory residue from my oxygen diffusion membrane. Let us depart, Bubin. Badassfully: What the hell did that accomplish. Two things. First, the vorcha knows we are following it. Badassfully: And second? You have demonstrated that you still posess a supportive endoskeleton. - Coquettishly: That’s right, baby. Tell me your soul name. It is whatever you wish it to be, polyp. Badassfully: What the hell is going on here. Are you sleeping with my sister. Slumber would be difficult due to the energetic nature of our copulation. Badassfully: Damn it, Blasto, that’s it. You and me, outside, right now. Coquettishly: Please don’t hurt him. This one promises not to harm your brother. Badassfully: I didn’t ask to be partnered with you, Blasto. No solid-waste excrement. You dislike the manner in which this Spectre operates. Badassfully: No, you’re one of the best damn cops I’ve worked with. Then what is the difficulty? Aside from your sister. Badassfully: The problem is that I can’t work with a partner that doesn’t respect me. This one greatly respects you. But you care more about protocol than stopping the vorcha. Badassfully: Doing it by the book is what separates us from them. Ha-ha! Kill you now! Spawn of questionable parentage. The vorcha! Get to cover! Badassfully: Damn it, Blasto. They got me. They got me bad. No, Bubin. You are too aesthetically displeasing to die. Badassfully: Promise me you’ll get the vorcha. They have already perished, though they are currently unaware of it. Badassfully: No. By the book. Promise me you’ll do it by the book. This one cannot acceed to this request. Badassfully: Promise me, damn it. Promise-Translator Error, obstruction in airway. Nooo. - Me give you money. Coquettishly: You didn’t say anything about attacking my brother. Brother? Rah! Me no pay you! My men kill you instead! Apologies, but your men had to catch a skycar. Blasto! How you find me? By following Bubin’s sister. It was obvious she helped your men plan the ambush. You no kill me! Diplomatic immunity! Yes. This one made a promise to do it by the book. You may only be killed in self-defense. Rah, you no see my gun. Ha! You are standing on flammable material. This one has no choice… but to enkindle this. Coquettishly: What are you going to do with me. Nothing. The vorcha kidnapped you to lure me in. That is all this one saw. Coquettishly: You don’t have to protect me. No. But your brother needs blood from a family member to survive. And indicted criminals cannot make tissue donations. Coquettishly: What. Bubin’s alive. Barely. And not for long. So cease talking and get to the hospital. Coquettishly: Thank you, Blasto. Thank you for breaking the rules for me. Polyp, when has this one ever been concerned with the rules. - You do not retire for another two solar days, Bubin. Badassfully: Ugh, what happened. We got to the vorcha. By the book. Blasto! The entire vorcha embassy burned down. Do you see how my suit is bulging? It’s because the turian councilor is in here with me, up my cloaca. He’s not happy. Nobody would be happy lodged in your cloaca, Chief. You’re lucky Bubin’s sister can testify that you killed him in self-defense! Do you know how much paperwork you’re going to have? My partner can take care of it. He is still restricted to desk duty for health reasons. Badassfully: Blasto, you son of a…
"Baddassfully: What the hell is going on here? Are you sleeping with my sister?"
"Slumber would be difficult due to the energetic nature of our copulation"
LOL
Damit blasto!!!!
Fun facts:
Blasto and the rest of the Hanar, all the Vorcha, and many Volus, are voiced by Mark Meer, aka Male Shepard.
The horny female elcor is voiced by Jennifer Hale aka FemShep.
Just found this for the first time so please excuse the 7 year delay.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
_What the actual fu-_
Mark Meer is amazing
@@drew2626 in all roles except Shep
Mark Meer is a terrible Shepard imo (Jennifer Hale ftw!), but he does an amazing Vorcha and Hanar!
"They Have Diplomatic Immunity" "Then this one wont use Diplomacy"
Almost as good as "Its just been revoked"
"Has a Prothean fallen from Heaven? Because this one would enjoy enkindling that" lmfao
"Are you engaging in reproductive behavior with this one?"
This always makes me laugh.
I thought he asked about the partner, not himself.
The goated Hanar line. I laughed for five minutes my first time hearing it.
"Badassfully: Hey, man...That's my sister."
and then i died choking on my own laughter
three...
solar...
days...
from retirement...
Badassfully: Dammnit
lol
ME4:
Play as a Hanar or a Volus with a badassfully Elcor crew.
@@enigma647 I imagine hanar have no reason to leave the Prothean "heaven", and they had no idea what to do with elcor and volus in Andromeda.
And of course the amount of setbacks that game had on top of everything, in between crunch, losing devs for Anthem (which wasn't even in production, no joke, until months before release) and EA forcing them to use Frostbite.
Oh and not having the main team in between some leaving and others being held in Anthem.
@@enigma647 There are Volus in Multiplayer.
@@zincwing4475 Ngl, I sunk probably 100+ hrs into multi-player. Gave it a shot on a whim after I beat the campaign a 2nd time.
Somebody on the ME 3 writing team is a big fan of the Dirty Harry and Lethal Weapon films. LMAO. The stressed-out Volus police chief is my favorite.
You forgot bad boys
I feel like Citadel DLC is a compilation of every joke to fly around Bioware while they made the entire trilogy.
This is in the main game, not DLC.
If I hear "badassfully" one more time, I'm going to destroy a shuttle.
With my bare hands.
Again.
Badassfully...
Hey man... that's my sister
Bubin has the most emotion I've heard out of any elcor.
"Are you sleeping with my sister?"
"Slumber would be difficult due to the energetic nature of our copulation."
"That's right, baby. Tell me your soul name." Geez, Elcor talk dirty!
So Blasto is voiced by Mark Meer and Polyp is voiced by Jennifer Hale. This means that Shepard is the only being in the Galaxy who has screwed him/herself.
My God . . . does Shepard's depravity know no bounds?
We'll bang, ok?
SinDawg030 her name isn't polyp it's honey
^ He means "baby" but jellyfish don't have babies so he says "polyp".
Report to the ship as soon as possible.
We’ll bang, ok?
Don't forget the 14-hour-long elcor play of Hamlet xD
except we never got to see it
I imagine OG bioware staff was hitting the blunt saying Imagine if renegade Shepard was a jellyfish and keep on goin
Whoever wrote this should of won awards.
Spawn of questionable parentage, the vorcha.
I just stumbled upon this today. I must have played this game 5-6 times now from start to finish, and I'm still finding new stuff.
This thing is the greatest thing ever.
All I have to say is Bubin brings new meaning to being a total badass.
Dear Bioware: Please make a Blasto DLC in the vein of Gat Outta Hell or Far Cry Blood Dragon. TAKE MY MONEY!
Would this use the Mass Effect 3 engine? Because now I'm just imagining a hanar doing combat rolls.
... Somehow it works. However an elcor doing combat rolls does not.
Also, what would a hanar's armour look like?
I couldn't stop laughing louder and louder every time I heard "Badassfully..."
An animated version of this would be so awesome!
"They have diplomatic immunity!"
"Then this one shall not use diplomacy."
Badassfully: This needs it's own game.
Badassfully, if not, it needs a TV show or something.
Bubin's dialogue is even more hilarious when you realize its flat voice is channeling Sylvester Stallone, instead of being deliberately monotone like other elcor.
Hammy _and_ one-note. Two great tastes that taste great together!
I need all the Blasto movies as real movies in my life...
The Elcor guy sounds like Duke Nukem played in slow motion
Badassfully: Damn it. I'm just 3 solar days from retirement. XD
Badassfully...damnit...
Woke up this morning with a desperate need to hear this. I knew I could count on youtube.
I love how they've just turned Blasto in Space Lethal Weapon.
Badassfully; I am Buben the Elcor, and this is my favorite audio-drama on the Citadel.
NOTHING ESCAPES SHEPARD'S LIBIDO!! NOTHING!! NOT EVEN HIS/HERSELF!!!
"nooooooooooooooooooooooo"
For the Volus police chief, every day ends with a tums festival.
underrated comment
9:03 Another extremely rare instance of female Elcor dialogue in Mass Effect, the first one being in a Elcor Hamlet ad in the Citadel in Mass Effect 2.
got to love Mark Meer talking to Mark Meer, using two completely different voices.
This is so bad it might actually be worth seeing...
Sharknado made money, could this be worse?
Sadly, I don't think so...
Stuff like this makes me love mass effect no matter how it ends.
"This one will attempt to determine a way to repay you"
Translation
"We'll bang okay?"
Should we start a Kickstarter to fund this movie? I want it!
Badassfully: best movie ever.
Best part of Mass Effect 3 by far. The endless Lethal Weapon and Die Hard references had me crying with laughter. Love it.
"Spawn of Questionable Parantage, get to cover" xD
"YOU NO TOUCH ME! DIPLOMATIC IMMUNI-" *THWAMTHWAMTHWAM*
3 minutes in and there are already references to Lethal Weapon and Dirty Harry.
"DIPLOMATIC IMMMUNITYYY!!!"
"This one has just revoked it."
Greatest movie ever!
"Are you engaging in reproductive behavior with this one?" Sounds like an overly polite way of saying 'are you fucking with me'.
Seeking validation: Senpai, notice me.
Senpai notices all
I know I’m 9 years late to the party, but one day I’m absolutely going to use the line “Did a Prothean descend from heaven? Because this one would enjoy enkindling that”. Single greatest pickup line I’ve ever heard 🤣.
This one suspected you have deviant mating fetishes.
This is incredibly funny. Thanks for uploading!!!
"You may engage in courtship rituals with my gastro-dermal lining."
(Translation) "Kiss my ass!"
"Spawn of questionable heritage".
They've got diplomatic immunity!
Then this one will not attempt diplomacy.
BEST LOGIC!
*badassfully*
its like lethal weapon in space! i love it!
This is utterly, utterly awesome.... ty for uploading it! :)
Every day is like a Tums festival....
Blasto's NOOOOOO gets me everytime.
Slumber would be difficult due to the energetic nature of our copulation.
Badassfully dammit blasto.....thats it ... You And me outside.........................right now
Ironic Sarcasm: I am hilarious, and you will quote everything I say.
Still a better ending than mass effect 3
Still? Get over it already lol
Yes, still. The ending didn't really change, now did it.
feniu10 I'm not disputing that. It was a let down yeah, but it was what 4-5 years ago? Grow up kid lol
''The ending didn't really change, now did it.'' Well actually it did.
This never gets old!! I used to stand by the signs just to hear this over and over!! 🤣🤣
anyone animate this yet?
Dirty Harry: Lethal Weapon.
TRANSLATOR ERROR: OBSTRUCTION IN AIR WAY
Thank you for uploading this, polyp.
I have played Mass Effect more than a few times. How am I only hearing this now?
Oh my god this is the best thing ever.
when is blasto 9: blasto takes back rannoch
After reading the list of all fictional movies in ME universe... man, I would love to see some of them: Blasto (of course), Ruck Humpers, Teenage Ninja Kwanzaa Force, Make It Look Real: The Lili T'Nigus Story, She's a Keeper, The 840-Year-Old Virgin, Call Me Sally to name a few, also Off Stage seems like a good movie.
Slumber would be difficult due to the energetic nature of our copulation
I love Mass effect
Bubin's translator has more emotion than Bubin himself.
Buben is seriously cracking me up here! Everytime he follows the word "Badassfully" with "Dammit!" LMAO
"Hah, you no touch me! Diplomatic immun-" BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! ....gotta love spectres!
"Are you engaging a reproductive behaviour with this one?" EPIC!
the "badassfully" never gets old
"Does this criminal scum consider itself fortunate?"
:D
*pew pew*
Spawn of questionable parentage!
"Slumber would be difficult, due to the energetic nature of our copulation."
I smell the plot for ME4 slowly taking shape
That was the most passive big no i have ever heard. I LOVE THIS.
Gorgeous and hilarious painting! :D
"Has a Prothean descended from heaven? Because this one would enjoy Enkindling that."
Oh boy. This video is going to entertain me for at least 11 minutes.
"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo"
TvTropes.
Chief: And you're also getting a new partner
Blasto: Are you engaging in reproductive behaviour with this one?
Thank you, Polyp.
And I'm like
Polyp, polyp, polyp oooh
like polyp, polyp, polyp oooh
Full transcript.
Damn it, Blasto, I told you to bring in those vorcha alive for questioning.
This one didn’t have anything to ask them.
You blew up half a level of Zakera Ward.
It was an aesthetically displeasing habitat anyway.
You don’t get it, Kahje-Clan. Ever since they found eezo on the vorcha homeworld, the Council’s been trying to make nice. Bottom line, you can’t touch the vorcha. They’ve got diplomatic immunity.
Then this one will not attempt diplomacy.
You’re also getting a new partner.
Are you engaging with reproductive behavior with this one?
Unless you want your Spectre status revoked, you’re working in a joint operation with Bubin from C-Sec.
An elcor? You know this one works alone.
Look, I’ve had to talk them down from suspending you. I’ve gotten a pulmonary ulcer from dealing with this mess. I can’t even eat solid food!
You would benefit from shedding excess body mass, Chief.
-
Greetings, Bubin. This one understands you are the second best law enforcement agent on the Citadel.
Badassfully: Funny. I heard the same thing about you.
Just avoid interfering with this one’s projected maneuvering path.
Badassfully: Hold it, Spectre. We do this by the book.
You may carry the book while this one opens another excretion vent on the vorcha ambassador.
Badassfully: Damn it, you big stupid jellyfish. I’m just three solar days from retirement.
Obtain a firm grip on your reproductive anatomy. The vorcha ambassador’s vehicle just turned down that skyway.
Badassfully: What the hell are you doing. This is my mate’s car. We just paid it off.
Hopefully you are insured.
-
Greetings, vorcha citizen. Please explain the reason for your haste.
You no touch me! Diplomatic immun- Ow! Ow! Ow!
Please exercise caution, criminal scum. Your face may cause damage to my partner’s vehicle.
Badassfully: Hey, you’re hurting him.
His unique genetic structure will enable him to regenerate… unless this one uses fire.
No talk, no talk!
This one has forgotten whether its pistol is currently equipped with incendiary ammunition. Does the criminal scum consider itself fortunate?
Badassfully: You’d better talk. I can’t hold him back.
Consort! Guarding boss at consort!
Have a pleasant day.
Badassfully: Damn it, what the hell was that. You’re out of control.
You may wish to monitor your stress levels. High blood pressure is unhealthy for a species adapted to a high-gravity environment.
Badassfully: Come on, I know someone at the Consort’s office.
This one suspected you had deviant mating fetishes.
Badassfully: You are paying for the car.
-
Coquettishly: Welcome to the Consort’s suites. Oh, Bubin, it’s great to see you.
Has a Prothean descended from heaven? Because this one would enjoy enkindling that.
Badassfully: Hey, man, that’s my sister.
Your progenitors’ genetic propensity for attractiveness was passed only to her.
Coquettishly: Who’s the big handsome jellyfish, Bubin?
Blasto. This one is training Bubin in proper legal procedure.
Badassfully: Listen, Honey, we need to get inside.
Coquettishly: You’re a pain, Bubin. But I can’t resist your good-looking partner.
Thank you, polyp. This one will attempt to determine a way to repay you.
Badassfully: Seriously, don’t be like that with my sister.
-
reetings, vorcha scum. This one mistook you for a krogan defecation.
You no talk! Me get your badge!
Badassfully: That badge is the only thing keeping him from killing you right now.
You be sorry!
This one is already story. It will take hours to remove your olfactory residue from my oxygen diffusion membrane. Let us depart, Bubin.
Badassfully: What the hell did that accomplish.
Two things. First, the vorcha knows we are following it.
Badassfully: And second?
You have demonstrated that you still posess a supportive endoskeleton.
-
Coquettishly: That’s right, baby. Tell me your soul name.
It is whatever you wish it to be, polyp.
Badassfully: What the hell is going on here. Are you sleeping with my sister.
Slumber would be difficult due to the energetic nature of our copulation.
Badassfully: Damn it, Blasto, that’s it. You and me, outside, right now.
Coquettishly: Please don’t hurt him.
This one promises not to harm your brother.
Badassfully: I didn’t ask to be partnered with you, Blasto.
No solid-waste excrement. You dislike the manner in which this Spectre operates.
Badassfully: No, you’re one of the best damn cops I’ve worked with.
Then what is the difficulty? Aside from your sister.
Badassfully: The problem is that I can’t work with a partner that doesn’t respect me.
This one greatly respects you. But you care more about protocol than stopping the vorcha.
Badassfully: Doing it by the book is what separates us from them.
Ha-ha! Kill you now!
Spawn of questionable parentage. The vorcha! Get to cover!
Badassfully: Damn it, Blasto. They got me. They got me bad.
No, Bubin. You are too aesthetically displeasing to die.
Badassfully: Promise me you’ll get the vorcha.
They have already perished, though they are currently unaware of it.
Badassfully: No. By the book. Promise me you’ll do it by the book.
This one cannot acceed to this request.
Badassfully: Promise me, damn it. Promise-Translator Error, obstruction in airway.
Nooo.
-
Me give you money.
Coquettishly: You didn’t say anything about attacking my brother.
Brother? Rah! Me no pay you! My men kill you instead!
Apologies, but your men had to catch a skycar.
Blasto! How you find me?
By following Bubin’s sister. It was obvious she helped your men plan the ambush.
You no kill me! Diplomatic immunity!
Yes. This one made a promise to do it by the book. You may only be killed in self-defense.
Rah, you no see my gun. Ha!
You are standing on flammable material. This one has no choice… but to enkindle this.
Coquettishly: What are you going to do with me.
Nothing. The vorcha kidnapped you to lure me in. That is all this one saw.
Coquettishly: You don’t have to protect me.
No. But your brother needs blood from a family member to survive. And indicted criminals cannot make tissue donations.
Coquettishly: What. Bubin’s alive.
Barely. And not for long. So cease talking and get to the hospital.
Coquettishly: Thank you, Blasto. Thank you for breaking the rules for me.
Polyp, when has this one ever been concerned with the rules.
-
You do not retire for another two solar days, Bubin.
Badassfully: Ugh, what happened.
We got to the vorcha. By the book.
Blasto! The entire vorcha embassy burned down. Do you see how my suit is bulging? It’s because the turian councilor is in here with me, up my cloaca. He’s not happy.
Nobody would be happy lodged in your cloaca, Chief.
You’re lucky Bubin’s sister can testify that you killed him in self-defense! Do you know how much paperwork you’re going to have?
My partner can take care of it. He is still restricted to desk duty for health reasons.
Badassfully: Blasto, you son of a…
"Are you engaging in reproductive behaviour with this one?"
(Translation) "Are you fucking with me?"
BADASSFULLY.
So... Why was the female Elcor working for the Vorcha?
The Vorcha was going to pay her for luring Blasto. She didn't realize her brother would be involved. She was doing it for the credits.
"This is me and my mate's car, we just paid it off."
"No solid waste excrement."
(Translation) "No shit."
Better than the new Star wars movie
HANAR-ELCOR SEX!?
"Sexually: Tell me your soul name."
"This ones soul name is whatever you want it to be."
ME4: played as fake shepherd, team up with the rejects races : hanar, Vorcha, volus, elcor, Yahg, sentient android (not geth)