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My biggest problem is getting out of my own head and actually doing things. We INFP's are great at thinking things but suck at carrying them out. It's so much simpler just to stay in the bubble and forget the real world.
I stumbled upon this video that says, "we lack the ability to sit with things that are unpleasant.", and that's the reason why execution is hard for INFP. Because we are affected by our emotions, and not because we do have poor time management or self-control. Negative affects us negatively, and positive emotions affect us positively in doing things. The best way to do about this is to learn to regulate our emotions.
Sometimes I feel like I'm not part of this world. As if I perceived him differently than others. When I'm alone, it's like I have my own world, but when I go out and meet people, I also see another world. It's so weird
An INFP here.. having a broken "INFP" day... you know what I mean. Disconnected and struggling... so it feels nice to have stumbled upon your video. Thank you
I am an INFP and feel like I never fit in... I have a few close friends and I feel great with them but most of the time I feel like i’m not part of any group because they’re not my type and yeah, I just feel weird, does anyone else feel like this ? Edit: omg thank you guysss, i’ve never looked back at my comment and I’m so happy with all the replies
I definitely feel that way. Don't really have any friends, and always feel like an outsider whereever I go. I've always had a hard time being in groups. I feel like I always become the quiet one, the outsider, the third wheel, the black sheep, etc. But I'm naturally a very introverted person, so I like being alone.
Definitely me! I would try and force myself to be like everyone around me but that would just make me feel even more uncomfortable and isolated. Instead I’m trying to embrace all this weirdness instead of rejecting it. I know now who comes in my life is special too because it takes a lot to enter this terror dome of a mind haha. You’re all good alone, and you’ll find your people.
Yeah like I have friends but I feel like I don’t fit in like I love them but I feel like no one will truly know me because I never open up fully even if I try to, I know they care but I have just always felt out of place
Yeah same. I don't like my friends and they don't like anyone from the group either. We are just "fake friends". Which I am wondering how the hell did I end up having such friends to begin with.. Probably because I was desperate to fit in..
Tips to succeed as an INFP: 1. Clean your room. 2. Take a bath every day (probably the hardest one) 3. Brush your teeth every day. 4. Eat on time and eat healthy. 5. Talk to someone every day. 6. Read a book every day (probably the easiest one) Found this on the INFP subreddit. I can't bother to link the post I'm too lazy for that
Having a daily routine, especially morning routine, helped me tremendously as an INFP. Sure I don’t follow it every single day, but I follow it on most days. And when I do, I am a lot happier. A cure for INFl is action. Figure out what it takes to get yourself to take action.
As someone working in the medical field. Amen. Routines are godammn exhausting but it’s what gets me further to who I want to become aka my idealized self. And on my off days (and I have them a lot) I just turn into a pile of goo and comfort myself with Oscar Wilde’s words of “Everything in Moderation, as well as moderation.”
As an INFP, I sometimes feel like a spectator in the sidelines of a tennis match, but my gaze doesn't follow the ball. Everybody else does, heads going back and forth. I am just enjoying the fresh air, observing people, my mind having its own ball game. At times, I feel out of place in this crowd. What the hell am I doing here?
As an infp who started playing tennis last year, i can confirm so many times I unintentionally stop looking at the ball and focus on some random thing or thought, while the ball is still flying towards me. I wonder what it's like to be able to just watch one ball without intrusive thoughts for more than 20 seconds
Freya Shipley the urge to do great things in the world/not settle, and then the inability to actually act on those great desires 🤷🏽♀️ that’s a good question you ask, I’m curious too
@@Noelleelle omg that exactly me, I keep retaking the test like a grumpy toddler saying "I don't want to be an infp" but what you just said sums me up perfectly
Lloyd Barnes I don’t know if it’s just me or if it’s an INFP thing, but I’ve been super stubborn my whole life. If I don’t want to do something, I don’t do it. When I was almost a toddler, I refused once to pick up my toys for over an hour...did not lift a finger lol I feel like that persistence has stayed with me my whole life
@@Noelleelle yep, I'm very stubborn and will do absolutely nothing about things if I don't believe truly in them. Procrastination is something that followed me my whole life, and not finding a purpose can put me in really bad cycles of rumination.
Soon thirty and still struggle to choose my path. Interested in so much, can’t decide if I should become a carpenter, psychologist, marine biologist, artist etc. So hard goddamnit 😭😂
Do all of them at the end of your life you can say hey I tried them all and you grow and know yourself s bit more as you try. You can do it don't be afraid
Me too! I have a degree in middle school teaching, but they kicked me out of my job.. Experienced sexual harassment and bullying by the principal and collaegues.. They also told me I'm "dumb", "arrogant", "not authentic" and so on.. Made openly fun of me having no family, being curvy and feminine and stuff.. So evil and judgemental.. I'm working as a freelance translator now but guess I'll get a masters degree for library work.. More interested in ideas, constructs and stories anyway.. Sorry for the bad english
I'm 32, been thru many many jobs, hated them all. Currently driving as an uber, it's not that I like it, it just seems to be least soul killing out of all others. It's like I'm in my own car with my own music, coffee etc. I still feel like I'm wasting my potential. I used to be like the best student in the entire school during my early education. Ended up with management degree which I never used (id hate to manage ppl). It's like I know I could do better but when I actually try it feels like the world is against me. Sucks....
Dreaming is so much easier than dealing with reality and sometimes I feel like it's driving me insane. But it's relieving to know that I'm not the only one feeling this way.
As an INFP, I am often misunderstood by my family and friends. Some of them called me a good for nothing even though they are not living life with integrity themselves. People often determine a person’s worth by their achievements and net worth, but not living a life of purpose and meaning
I thought I was the only one who felt this way. Especially abt the achievements (the ones THEY think are worthy) and net worth. I. An artist and it’s feast or famine sometimes but at least I feel like I’m living authentically ❤
The more you fail , the more you are depressed . The more you fail , the more you have chance to leave studies .. No ..fail is not good in our world , even it's very rich of experiences and learning ..but still...🙃
This was exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you! I'm a 71 year old INFP who has spent my whole life trying to fit myself into the societal dictates. And then always wondering why I never could stick to anything for more than about 3 years until I would have a major shake-up and change everything. Only to repeat. I finally see that my INFP nature was never acknowledged or appreciated. I did believe that I was uniquely flawed maybe permanently depressed and definitely overly emotional. No more for me. I will be authentic no matter what. It's all about balance isn't it?
Loved your comment here. I'm 73 and the same - now remembering all my life - since birth actually I would never be in one place more than 3 years. Since birth never fit in. As an INFP I have so many amazing talents that could change how millions of people think - TV shows - ans still don't know how to get them out there. Sherman is really helping and you - finding others who are like me and will now be our authentic amazing self.
Did you regularly change jobs? It's often said that the old generation prefer to stick to one job or company for life while the current young gen tend to job-hop.
So refreshing to hear from older infps! I'm 58 and watching videos and reading comments of younger people is sometimes discouraging- thinking, "it's too late for me." I also tend to move every 4 years but I've been in my current place for 6 years and for the last two I've been obsessive about finding somewhere diff to live. A although I have had the same job for 20 years.. it's just a job, not a passion.
@@danam4536 I'm an INFP with the either good or bad fortune of being an artist dreamer. I had jobs when I was young, but none lasted for more than three years, thus the moving. The issue was always the same - I'm intelligent, was good at whatever I did and very clear about how to add to the success of a project. But when an owner or manager boss would repremand me or insult my intelligence or motives, make up things I saw as petty or untrue, especially if I spoke up and was put down - it would be the begining to the end, and I would finally quit. I think an INFP's wiring is too sensitive to endure abuse, at least mine is. So I chose to be self-employed. I think no matter what it is - a long term job or marriage - if you're being loved and accepted for who you are, praised and rewarded, then stick with it. I choose happiness, that's all.
Ohhh, I used to talk about my school the same way! I'd say: "I may not be the perfect student for this school, but this school is the perfect one for me"
Grow sum skillz people! Seriously. I agree. It’s not easy. Fake it until you make it. Stay out of your head (as much as humanly possible). Get confident now. Our lives are worth it.
Lmfao, great message, one tiny flaw is that your preaching what everyone else is preaching with no real solution. How tf do I "get out of my head". Are you even an infp?? Yes we can try to conform to societal expectations but we won't be fulfilled from it. This is the wrong message entirely. What infps need is to revel in there sensitive creativity. Create for themselves, not for others and be in a profession where they can help others. That's what will truely make them happy
That moment when it's literally hard to find two examples of famous people with your personality type without stumbling across someone who committed suicide 😅😶
I've learned as an INFP that you don't have to worry about your Te inferior. Instead, focus on your tertiary Si. Be stringent about your routine and keep your environment absolutely clean and clutter free. Most people who have problems with INFP's have problems not with the INFP's warmth and friendship ability, nor their talents. The problem that people have with INFP's is that they are so often dysfunctional people. But you can't counter this by stressing out your Te inferior, you have to hit the 3rd function. It has to be an INFP's priority to be as functional as possible. INFP's are not disliked, they are just dysfunctional. As a personal anecdote, I learned later on that people thought I just looked sloppy and unkempt, and always seemed disorganized, and that caused me to get shafted. But no one ever had a problem with my sense of kindness or friendship making skills. People always admired my philosophical nature and linguistic and writing talents, my imagination. So I stressed about those things, rather than worrying about what the real problem was--which was that I wasn't so careful about grooming and being organized. So how do you fix it? You worry about your Si. You use segmented thinking to put your life into a carefully planned routine. For me this has also become a new part of my overall morality, it's not just an unimportant detail. At least...that's my story, but I think it can be applied in some sense to most INFP's.
I relate! Not only do I have an androgynous face, but I never really wanted to dress feminine growing up either. I would say my style fits who I am, someone from outer space. At least that's what I feel like lol. I did a project last October. I had saved my hair out, so I bleached it blonde, started dressing posh, with white turtlenecks and a black fancy coat. People were more accepting of me then and treated me like I was some upper-class nice martyr weirdo. It felt good tho. When I dress how I want and don't care about society people think I'm some super weird creepo lol. I hate that you have to conform to fit into society but... I guess that's life sometimes..
That was really useful to know. It's great getting advice from more experienced INFPs who've dealt with issues that INFPs generally face. Thank you very much for your comment.
as an infp I’ve always had trouble following schedules and routines, I despise them, they make me feel constrained and controlled whereas I like to feel free, this always ends up in me being behind in almost everything I do, I’m hoping to change this bcs I finally have a goal I want to work hard for
Yes, me too 😁 These thoughts patterns can definitely be challenging when goal setting 🏆 I've found affirmations to be helpful Everyday, l repeat: *I love routines and schedules because l can stick to them consistently while maintaining my individuality, creativity, spontaneity and freedom*
Ever read what Andreas Hofer says about intuitive neurotribes? It explains quite a lot these tendencies and their real application. What we are built for inside.
We’re not meant for this world to be honest. To go to work at a 9-5 to be told to do the most mundane tasks every damn day until retirement is not ya. We yearn to make a difference, we yearn to express ourselves, we yearn to be one with nature but this world doesn’t award that. In order for us to make it, we have realize that we are quite controlling. Henceforth, we must take control. Become entrepreneurs, where we control the vision and our own expression. Take over the arts, where we’re free to express ourselves. Believe it or not, volunteering to work within the ropes of this world will leave us feeling unfulfilled, and metaphorically in shackles!
Struggling to find a way to break out of my patterns....I’m 23 and I can’t drive because I’m too anxious, therefore I can’t get around easily and be independent, still in school full time so i can’t make much money, i have a very boring and soul crushing part time job and I feel exhausted all the time bc nothing is feeding my soul. I feel very very very stuck and miserable. I don’t know how to get from here to where I want to be. This helped a little bit. I just need to start gaining some skills. a new job, a drivers license, some new artistic skills. all that could go a long way.
It's insane how much INFPs have in common. I got my driving licence a few years ago but I never use it because whenever I'm behind the wheel I get super anxious. At the age of 25 I still struggle to find something I can make a living out of (even though I'm almost finished with my studies - the only thing left is to write my thesis with which I'm really struggling with... it seems so mundane and I know I'm never gonna use my degree because I lost interest in what I've been studying). Just like you I also feel stuck but for me since I started working out it helps so much. It puts me in some sort of a schedule which I'm trying to apply on other aspects of my life. Getting distracted and procrastinating is still some of my biggest weaknesses but I gotta focus on my end goal to beat them.
im An INFP type personality that had made the decision that suicide was always an option. I’ve spent most of my my time alone in this thought pattern but introspectively rationalized that as long as I kept it to myself. I subconsciously believed and reinforced this thought and I’m very appreciative of your video. I understand your train of thought and laughed a bit when you mentioned that it is hard to figure out what to even eat sometimes. I’m always alone by choice but I hate it. Time to turn this franchise around. Lol
Hey Ryan, I'm also am an INFP, and know how it is! But, I think we are here to enjoy life, and be kind to people, and we are the ones that will change the world by being an INFP. Go out and help the helpless, be a force for good, and love your life! You are here for a true and good purpose, yes, this world is an evil place, but...we are here to change that, and we can help ourselves by learning lessons from life, and loving ourselves, and loving others. You are a neat person Ryan, you are here to help bring light out into the open.
I don’t have any social media profiles so I was surprised to see responses to my comment. I think I just felt compelled to say that I related to realizing that I might be a certain type of person but I felt stupid doing so. I feel less stupid now and even though I know Intellectually that people can’t be simply categorized I do think that certain people have certain tendencies that are innate. Props to the maker of this video and thanks to those who responded.
As an INFP, I think Investing is important for us. When you're financially independent, you can do anything that you're passionate about without having to worry about money. Look at the things differently and start see the bigger picture, guys! Good luck 🤞
Stuck in your room and comatose. This is exactly what I have done for the past 15 years. I wrote today that I simply hate that I exist , and I hate that I have awareness of this existence. Lol I wrote also that I have to come to terms with the fact that I exist. I have to move around, talk to people face conflicts. I hate conflict.
As an infp I have found journaling to be useful. It allows you to venture deeper into your thoughts and sort through the tangled mess. It’s awesome because then you can revisit and reflect on those thoughts at a later time.
I’d recommend looking into bullet journaling for any infp that wants to build up their self discipline. For me I could do something as long as I had motivation but motivation always goes away after a while and I would stop doing things that bettered myself because I no longer had motivation and lacked any self discipline. Bullet journaling has helped that tremendously and once I write a goal down I don’t forget it and it pushes me to accomplish the important things in life. In order to get better and accomplish the things you want you have to have the right mindset and build up habits that help you succeed which is something I’ve had to learn
Ooh yes!! But setting up your own bullet journal can get you stuck if youre trying to perfect everything. I bought a planner from "Mi Goals" and it has a great layout, really helped with starting out my productivity journal. Or you could also try the "Fabulous" app 😊
@@melissatran4780 I might try that route, I did want to try doing a bullet journal, I even bought one.. but I never started it because I felt lost and stuck in how to actually start it, how it should look, etc. I definitely could use it though.
Your not alone. I think there are quite a few of us in this comment section. My infp friend is someone who I consider a friend for life, but she has had some hard stuff happen and is in a lonely place. Funny thing is, of all the people I know she is the only one my infj gifts cannot help yet is the one I want to help the most.
I always see INFJs in every INFP-related video watching it for a loved one. Must be one of the reasons why I love ur types so much!! I promise u ur INFP friend is gonna appreciate it!
I'm 32 and still finding out what my place in this life will be. I'm scared to choose a direction because I know it will be hard for me to commit and actually finish something. Been there, done that, it never worked. I'm working as a cleaner and just know I can be more than that, if only I would finish something, stop dreaming of making something out of my life and actually start participating in this real world. Problem is I have so many interests, no discipline and the need to procrastinate my day away. I absolutely hate this, also because people know I'm like this and they tend to protect me against myself when I come up with a new brilliant plan of what I'm gonna be when I grow up...Also, I have the feeling I'll never do just that. But finding out a lot of you struggle with this too makes me feel less alone, less weird. I'm so happy I found mbti, all of you guys,...it makes me understand myself more so I can finally try to make peace with who I am.
Being an Infp means the temptation to dream life away is huge. For me, I always feel disappointed with myself before I start. I found if I just do the thing without allowing myself to become overwhelmed by expectation, I’m much more content. It’s hard though, when you know you can just pretend and it feels better than reality in that moment.
I think, once you find your true purpose, the temptation to dream your life away will slowly fade. It's all about centering yourself, grounding yourself, determination, discipline, consistency and focus. You'll never know unless you try 💕
I spent 2 years in a very deep agonizing depression. I barely did just enough to function, I was the most miserable I've ever been in my life. I truly believed I was too sensitive for this world. I found out, through the rekindling of friendships, that I am capable of so much more. I am not lazy, I can work hard. I started working hard I started proving things to myself. I work hard I work 14 hour days, I'm exhausted but I'm also SO FREAKING HAPPY! I love the people I work with, I love what I do. I have established a good reputation. I don't make a whole lot but the reward of knowing what I'm capable of means so much to me!
@@bandeppert At that time I was working at a river resort. Currently I work at the hospital full time. I'm only a nurse tech right now but I'm planning on going to school to become an LPN.
@Me I think noticed theyre very rarely comedians but are almost always artists or poets. The only "comedians" that are INFP usually self express through an artistic medium, and arent your stand up type (ex: i feel like JaidenAnimations fall under INFP)
As an INFP it so hard for me to go out, make new friends and connect. But I know now I need it very much. I'm at a point in my life that I finally understood that I have to put an effort into creating my reality if I want it to change into the one I'm dreaming about. I gave myself new responsibilities, started consciously changing. Finally I took the wheel and started changing the course of my ship (and actually took it out from the bay if you know what I mean). But then the quarantine happened and seriously I got so sad and defeated. All my efforts and the small steps I took got squashed. I'm good at sitting in the house, being alone, not attending gatherings...but I did so much to finally get out and the worst part is I was finally ready. I was only begining my new journey and now I can't continue. For me mentally this is the hardest part of the situation we are all in with the pandemic. But I will spend my time productively and I will remember about my dreams and plans. Hopefully there will be a place for them after all this.
What’s helped me the most is actually to stop trying to be what I’m not and dive into what I am wholeheartedly and without fear to the best of my abilities. I’ve started to realize a few years ago, now 32, that I’ve put a ton of energy into other peoples expectations of me and while much of it has grown me, that can’t lead me to where I’m made to be. I have to embrace growing my weaknesses, but even more so dive into my passions and strengths knowing no matter how counter worldly wisdom it may seem. Being who I am is the only thing that will satisfy me or keep me passionate and fulfilled.
To all my fellow INFP's out there who need support, I can understand how much you struggle and how much you fight. Please stay strong, you're important and you deserve the happiness. Give yourself a chance! Take small steps towards your goals and don't overwhelm yourself. Push yourself (Not too hard) towards what you want for yourself and you will get it!! Sending positive energy to y'all!! - From your fellow INFP
I work as a counselor. Today,I used your video to help an INFP cult victim who was feeling really trapped. It gave him a foundation to work from. Your explanation was so awesomely targeted to his personality type that you could get through to him where I couldn't. Thank you. I think you probably saved /changed his life. Thanks for reaching out in ways that help. He very much dwells in that wordless feeling place. You get that and know how to bridge that gap. Thanks for giving him a road map.
I've been watching these types of videos , I've fallen in this INFP personality type explanation and this is the maybe the third time I've come across an ARMY ☺
I'm from Japan. I found your channel just recently and your videos are helping me love myself a lot!! It sometimes sucks to be a little different from others especially in Japan but now I have better understandings of who I am and what I can achieve in this life and stuff. ありがとうございます!
I m living in Japan too. It is great to know there is a fellow INFP who watches the same video as I do. Hope we can all be our true selves and achieve better to our full potential!
I feel as an INFP that we're here to help people emotionally (well it's the case for me). Countless times I've been hurt by people only to end up helping them realise why they behave the way they do. And then they get therapy or grow as a person. I feel happy for them but it's a drain for me. I wouldn't change helping anyone grow, but I sometimes wonder what's in it for me in the long run? To always be that emotional catalyst for people? I don't know, being an INFP definitely isn't easy. Sometimes wish I wasn't one.. but then again I wouldn't be so unique either. You get used to being lonely, and not fitting in. It's like a way of life now, low expectations of people because they just don't understand and usually let you down. It's like being in a room just looking out at the world pass you by.. both figuratively and sometimes literally. I feel like I'm wasting my life because I can't push myself to do what I really want to out of fear, fear of not being good enough, fear of embarrassment. Wonder is anxiety a symptom of being an INFP?
Same..I have helped people countless times..its like when ever my friends need advice or support I can give them an ocean of emotional strength...but it hurts when i get betrayed by them
This is so helpful! As an INFP I always feel like I don’t “fit in” with the world around me. I’m currently trying to find ways to adapt to the world while still staying true to myself so I can make my impact in the most efficient way!
As ungrateful as this may sound, I realized my first real purpose in life was to not be like my parents. I've never smoked, never been a partier, didn't even try alcohol until after my 21st birthday (I know, I'm not that kind of fun person). They wanted me to go to university when they were married, but then they changed their minds since they couldn't support me after their divorce, but I went anyway, thanks to grants, scholarships, subsidized loans, and working part-time my entire academic career. They've never left their comfort zone. After graduating from university, I moved to Japan for work. I know they did what they could, and the experiences we went through helped me become adaptable, resourceful and self-reliant, but I'm still trying to unlearn some of the toxic behavior I inherited. Finding a purpose will be a lifelong endeavor it seems, but as long as I stay focused and open-minded in the present, I'm sure it will just come to me without having to worry about it.
I feel so seen. I literally almost cried watching this. I used to feel capable and be able to see my potential, but the older I am, the harder it gets, the more it seems like I just... can’t do things like other people can. Thank you for this push. I really needed it!
This is my life right now 🙈 I recently asked my boyfriend, an INTJ Type 8 entrepreneur (we get along really well, I swear!) to help me get back on track with my hopes, dreams and passions. I used to be incredibly creative, enjoying art, stories and writing, especially. But over the years, fear, doubt and some really shitty choices pretty much choked it out of me. Nothing I tried seemed to work, until I got the idea to set my super logical, practical boyfriend on the problem, and now I have a whole plan laid out for me to pick myself up again 🤩 it's all basically implementating what you're saying here 😁 I created my first piece of art in years today, and I'm SO chuffed 🥳🎨 I never would have thought of doing it if it hadn't been for your videos though, so thank you! Keep up the awesome work, you rock! 😍🤗
One thing that helps me as an infp is bullet journaling. I do bad with strict schedules everyday but I also do bad if I have no idea what goals I want to achieve today or this week. It has helped me accomplish the important things in life to me like making sure I workout everyday and study the foreign language I’m learning. I’d recommend looking into it if you want to help yourself in growing your self discipline and creating new habits. For me I would always give up on something once the motivation is gone so I’ve had to seriously build up my self discipline and remember the end goal of what I want to accomplish! Also love your profile pic
I love reading this, because my bf is also INTJ and I have also been relying on him to help me get my life back on track. He's very practical and logical, and he made things seem so much easier than they seemed in my head. I still struggle with actually doing things, but I feel like I accomplished quite a few things thanks to him. It is not easy for him, but he still helps me put things in perspective. It has been 2 years since your comment, but I related to it, so I wanted to leave a comment here too. We can do it!!
As an INFP, I can be motivated and do things but as soon as I get motivated, it always dwindles away and I burn out. This video is a reminder that just because I have feelings doesn't mean I have to let them control me. Your words are wisdom and make an impact to those of us INFPs who want to make constant improvement in our lives. Thank you.
When I hear this I feel like you’re talking to an injured INFP type. Touching on what you said about trying new things to increase skills and life experience. It’s important for the Infp to try out many different things but also to be a master of one. At least for a time in order to be able to be an independent person and make it in the world. I commend you for encouraging infps. If Alicia keys and Stephen Colbert and John Lennon can make it.... but they had to focus on just one thing.
I'm a young adult who is a INFP myself and there's time that I feel like I'm not going anywhere. I feel stuck sometimes, and think what I would bring to the world, and if it's something even worth bringing out for people. I always daydream, and in my own little world as a way of relieving myself from the struggles. I'm scared to go out on my own. I feel like I won't be strong enough to help others or even myself.
The Invitation It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for And if you dare dream of meeting your heart’s longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love For your dream, for the adventure of being alive. It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon . . . I want to know if you’ve touched the center of your own sorrow. If you have been opened by life’s betrayals Or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own Without moving to hide it, or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy, Mine or your own. If you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy Fill the tips of your fingers and toes Without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, To remember the limitations of being human. It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another To be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal And not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy. I want to know if you can see beauty even when it’s not pretty Everyday And if you can source you own life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure yours and mine And still stand on the edge of the lake And shout to the silver of the full moon, “Yes.” It doesn’t interest me to know where you live Or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night Of grief and despair, Weary and bruised to the bone And do what needs to be done for the children. It doesn’t interest me who you know and how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire With me and not shrink back. It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom You have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside When all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself And if you will truly like the company you keep in the empty moments. Oriah Mountain Dreamer May 1994
“you’re just wilting and slowly dying if you don’t go out there and try to gain skills to make your life better” me, a year into this pandemic, confined to my room: 😐
I'm sorry I laughed when you said at the beginning "you need to find some skills- I'm sorry if that's not a sugar coated way of saying it" because it really was nice and also helpful (infp here)
Our inner self is getting some validation on this video. My inner self was very hurt from being ignored all my life so this is what gets me in this video.
At first when I watched this and saw the comments, I had a really uneasy and helpless feeling. Never deep dived into the MBTI personalities. So I never before thought of my INFP-ness as crippling until then. In fact, I was proud of my NFP nature. I feel it gave me an emotional intelligence, and made me so in tune w others feelings, which is a superpower in itself. I needed a moment for the video to sink in positively. And Im thankful cause I do think we INFPs need constant reminder to be more present, and to make the impact that we can. Cause we really can! Don’t do yourself like that, and think that you are helpless and doomed. My best friend is a fellow INFP, and she is vibrant, talented, and loved! I know for sure she will make it in this world. Thats why I know I can too, and so can you. We are actually in the perfect situation right now to build skills, and unlearn toxic habits. So I guess thats a silver lining to this whole pandemic situation 😌
I’m an INFP male married to an ESTJ female. I love her but I’m glad that I saw this! I had to find a career that fits my personality. Now I am a therapist and I feel that I am changing the world... slowly but I have seen a difference in some of my clients. The other thing that helped is acceptance of my emotions and the fact that I do enjoy them even if society says I shouldn’t. I am a much happier person now than I was 15 years ago. I like who I am 75% of the time! Thank you for the video! (43 year old INFP)
Hello Matt. I am a female INTJ and my enneagram type is 5w4. I watched your video because I have INFP male friend and I want to learn about him so that, in my INTJ way, I can help him (not 'fix' him). Understand, support, use my abilities to show him I love him. I am 64 years old and when I was young and unaware of my unusual personality type, I struggled with life. I've since found out that I am an HSP (yes, an INTJ can be a HSP too lol). I felt, and feel, like I don't belong in this world. It's too much survival of the fittest, dog eat dog. Navigating the world left me with many bruises but I can say that I see myself as a success. Not rich or famous kind of success, but that I am still here, engaged with life and happy with my uniqueness. I have no specific advice except to emphasize that one must keep on trying. In the face of all your apparent failures (from the world's perspective) be willing to dust yourself off and keep going. Lord, is that hard! My spirituality has done for me what people, jobs, money could not do. It gave me validation of my presence in the world. Thank you for this wonderful video.
Im an INFP woman in her fifties and I don't say this lightly but I believe I have had a spiritual awakening I used to hide away from the world I felt like I was lost and I was an alien LOL but in the last two years I've changed significantly even my looks have changed I have taken to going out ballroom dancing and meeting new people all the time sometimes I feel a little shy but I go and do it anyway I feel so much happier. I also believe the job I do makes a difference one person at a time I work with the elderly I am a hairdresser mostly working with dementia and Alzheimer's patients I thank you for your videos
I think our greatest curse is the Fi-Si loop and the doubt we have in ourselves at the end. Your point about how that unconscious belief that you can’t do anything to improve your situation (Ne & Te MIA) is often the single biggest thing keeping you stuck where you are really hits home for me. There’s a very famous quote from the movie Scent of a Woman: “I always knew what the right path was. Without exception, I knew. But I never took it. You know why? It was too damn hard.” Translation: You ALWAYS have a choice, but most people are not willing to pay the price.
Hey fam, first thing... you got this! One thing that’s helped me grow is practicing stoicism and adopting a minimal lifestyle, i can get lost in the sauce sometimes... by clearing my mind and focusing on the path(stoic) and clearing my environment(minimalist)I’ve see major improvements. When I do get stuck in my head it’s not as difficult to rebound. Hope this helps someone
Thank you. Honest, heartfelt thank you. It no longer feels like I am existentially alone. It no longer feels as if I can't do anything to change that situation. It no longer feels as if my power was stripped away from me by a bunch of invisible goblins in the forest. I feel like I can do something to feel like I know I deserve to feel and how I want to feel. You're a guide, my man. I'm going to change myself so that I can allow myself to feel fulfilled. I will allow myself to feel joy and autheticity flowing through my veins. Yeah, there will be bad days and bad times, but now I know that I'm not alone in this invisible struggle, and that really has a huge impact on who I am and how I percieve myself. I accept myself as I am, not what my weaknesses and mistakes make me think of myself. Thank you for this video, man. I wish you and all of you struggling right now the best in your search for meaning.
We all have a role to play in this world, firstly! As a fellow INFP myself I'd love to voice/remind us how truly special we are in world! We are meant to shine our lights & stand separate from the masses for a purpose! Our gifts are meant to stand apart from the "sheep" 😊🤟💜
Lovely , positive, helpful. My mantra for a number of years was “ I am a kind and thoughtful person and I deserve better.” Things did eventually get so much better and now I do my best to help others when I can in small,thoughtful ways.
I'm 40, and I feel like life is passing me by, and I'm just ... stuck, for far too many reasons. I need to let this video settle in my mind and heart a while, really take it in. I had an epiphany: My dad was INFP. I'm sure of it. So many things make sense now. :(
I love how calming you sounded throughout the whole video. It really felt like it was coming from a truly authentic loving place. Like "you can do this. You can get out of this funk."
I am an INFP and I can't imagine not being an entrepreneur and working for myself. I would highly recommend any INFP to document or at least think about their favorite hobbies/gifts/talents (I know documenting is difficult, just try) Start a side hustle, explore and get the ball moving. It can be a difficult road but for me finding complimentary individuals to perform the tasks and who have the organization skills I don't have allowed me to bring my dreams and creations to life.
It’s so refreshing to see there is individuals like myself. I often felt “weird” or out of place. I would hide some of values/interests from my friends because they weren’t aligned with others in my environment. Knowing that I’m an INFP-T explains that. Keep up the good work! INFP’s, keep pushing and never give up! The day is perfect, even when it’s storming outside 😁. Peace and balance to all!
It is often said that geographical solutions don’t work when it comes to a spiritual malady, however, you seem to be thriving in Japan and I wonder to what degree, if any, you accredit your success to having had the guts to make a radical change of setting. By the way, that’s a beautiful library setting. You seem to have a really great head on your shoulders. I agree with what you’re saying - that forcing myself out into the world is good for me - that’s when I’ve managed to make little leaps that have allowed my life to change. I know I have basic capabilities that I have developed out. Although I very much enjoy my alone time, I also get cabin fever and always feel better when I force myself out the door. It hurts my brain when I try to figure out what is this internal barrier that impedes my being ready, willing and able to get myself out the door. Ironically, I’m watching you on the same screen that makes it too easy for me to stay in. I can spend so much time watching CNN, MSNBC, and other content that does not ultimately feed my spirit well... and yet, I go back to it again and again. I hope this positive use of screen connectivity will be my bridge to participating in real life again. I don’t know if it’s relevant, but I’ve also just recently discovered the enneagram model of personality demarcation and I’m pretty sure I’m a 9 on that system. I was very interested to learn that most 9’s are not INFP as I would have thought it to be somewhat of a natural fit, but obviously that’s from a fairly specific point of view. I look forward to looking at more of your ideas, Sherman. It would appear that you have discovered a winning formula for our people. I know you have your own website (and good on you by the way for developing your Internet proficiency to the point where you’re able to reach out to others of us in a variety of ways) but for those of us who grew up pre-internet, i.e., Gen-X and beyond, have you ever considered writing a book on how to be a successful INFP-9? I no were a fairly small minority of the general population, but I bet it would appeal to other intuitive feelers as well as other enneagram types such as 2 and 6. Anyway, I would buy your book.
To be able to get on in life, support myself and yet not compromise my values was a huge challenge for me. I chose to be a nurse and basically it saved me. Talking to ppl is easy because the script is already there , you just ask the patient about themselves and take it from there. Already the type of work is already very patient focused so I just avoided the management bs by staying as close to my patients as possible. I will be retiring in a year or so, it has been a good career for me. I feel I have been able to help ppl.
I got to a point where i was so stagnant, was constantly in my head. Until I realised I should bring out what's in my head into my reality as much as possible. I would sit in the park alone, make my living space a utopia, be unapologetically myself and make my reality the reality I see in my head. the negative to that is I find a lot of other people uninteresting...
INFPs have so much to say and take part in. They can do so much, like anything that has to do with the arts or helping others. Painting, writing, counseling, teaching, and advocacy works. They are good representatives for peace. I wish heads of governments were INFPs. Sincerely yours, Your revering and loving brother, INFJ.
This was a very INTP logical way of analyzing and dealing with life. It's strange to hear a message of changing your outlook so much it resembles a different personality type. It seemed a little vague, but as any Perceiver, we might expect a list of what to change and an explanation of how it will affect and improve things. For example, I'm not sure how learning an instrument will change the world (me being a little facetious)
I suffer with a lot of mental illness related things (I won’t go into it) but as I’m growing up the best way for my to cope with the stress of life is to remind myself that NOTHING MATTERS. Literally- nothing- matters. So why not do what I want? I want to paint - I want to run - i want to dress the way I want to dress and befriend who I want to befriend and go places I want to go. Nothing matters. This is the only way I can give myself motivation for life and the basis for all my ideals. I have to constantly remind myself to forgive myself, and to try my best to do what I want to do. I just want to live a slow life enjoying the things I enjoy.
I'm a scared person. The world will find out how akward I am. I start to sweat when I have interactions with the check out lady or have to make a phone call. But I believe in having a purpose. Wanting to make an impact. Being kind. I care about others and how they feel. And I love art and anything that feeds my soul. Yep, INFP
hey im very similar to what you said. I even started an art journal recently 😂 i feel awkward around people, a while back i made the choice to speak only when spoken to so I dont have the chance of stuttering :o it make me feel better that I'm not the only one like this, I hope you are well !♡
I am an INFP-A, although I have seen how i used to be an INFP-T before I ever took this personality test just a little over a week ago. I follow the David Hawkins consiousness level chart. I 1 million percent know I can make a positive impact in the world. This video popped up for me. 😅 and I LOVE looking like a weirdo! If us INFP-T, can also switch over to INFT with the A (Assertiveeve) even for a few minutes, people will see the confidence in us and want to follow our love and kindness. I have witnessed this happen in my own life. People want to lead with Love! Some just need to be shown how to. That's why we are here! ❤❤❤❤❤. It was so great that this video showed up on my feed.
Hey Sherman, I just wanted to say thank you for these infp vids, I've been following you for quite some time now. I'm not an INFP myself (I'm an ISTJ) and your videos bring me that little bit closer to understanding my INFP boyfriend. He's a very guarded person and keeps to himself, but when he's in a good mood I get to see his more playful side. Lately he's been very moody and instead of telling me head on what his issues are he goes about it in a "roundabout" fashion through passive aggressive jokes. He only tells me his issues when it's already too late. I would love to be a pillar of strength for my INFP man but sometimes it's hard to goddamn read him!
Passive aggressiveness comes out when we don’t have enough time connecting to ourselves or feel pressured outside too much... he might need some more alone time ^^ Or maybe he’s in a bad place right now and needs support. One can never tell lol. But seriously, just ask him about those and validate his experience.
IMO processing everything, thoughts emotions, internally can be daunting for infp’s. For me it’s a challenge to integrate my feelings productively into my relationship when it seems so easy for my wife (enfp) who just says what she feels all the time.
Hi, I started keeping away from my ex because I was stressed from work (overworked), and she had made a comment I was struggling with personally and I was too afraid to confront her about it because I did not want to seem petty. We had planned a date but I forgot that I had also volunteered to work that same day at a free health clinic for kids. When I told her I wanted to move our date to a few hours later, she told me to cancel my volunteer work for that day instead. She apologized immediately but I was worried that such a thing would cross her mind. My opinion. Less pressure and more "kisses and I love yous" will help him feel more aligned.
"A triangle, not a heart" *smirk* How do you, random guy from a random channel TH-cam recommended, already see inside my head xD I love your videos! It is awesome to feel understood!
I can't recommend INFPs enough to do an emotional mastery course! There are solutions to our emotional type... that is to learn about emotions and to master them.
You know, though it might seem like a strange match, my husband is an ISTP. A few might think that wouldn’t exactly be a match made in heaven, and well, we do sometimes clash a little, but to be honest, one thing he has really taught me to is to approach things a lot more objectively. He is a huge problem solver, and a fantastic listener. My own self-worth has really gotten better since I met him, and he, too, has learned to trust with an open heart. 🥰 We’re both a couple of artisans and workaholics, so we feed off each other in that way, too.
Not sure if you mentioned this, or if it might even hold true, but I think we can try to change something on an upper level of the pyramid by changing the things that lie below it. You can't just wake up one day and change your identity altogether. You can however, change your environment to help support different behaviours from the one you currently have, which would in turn end up changing what things you can achieve, which will end up changing your beliefs over time, and ultimately you'll identify yourself with that person. Say, suppose (and I'm giving this example to help myself out), you want to change the identity of being unmotivated, or slow, you can't just change your belief and make it happen right away. No, you have to place yourself in an environment where you are forced (doesn't work so well) or encouraged (this works better for INFPs) to develop healthier behaviours - like sleeping and eating at specific hours. Once you have healthier behaviours in place, over time you'll be capable to handle more things because you have that much extra energy. And when you realise you can do it, you'll go like - damn, I didn't think I could, but now I can. Finally, you change your identity this way.
Exactly. Aspiring with Te is a sure fire way to reach integration with your entire system. Unhappiness in INFP’s can usually be related to relying too much on our feelings which is good but so is ration/logic. Gotta get that balance.
So in a nutshell, your video is about, "you are what you believe, and make a decision to get outside your comfort zone and put into action your dreams". I am an INFP. Thanks for the insight. I will rewatch this video a lot better when I am not distracted by something else.
It's absolutely insane that some of us share such a deep seated set of universal perceptions and impulses. I've felt like an INFP since I was three years old and tried to 'runaway' by riding my tricycle to the Masonic Library three blocks away climbing up on the left Sphinx and begging for it to Take me away to where it was from I've been on that journey, sometimes only in my head, sometimes out in the great unknown, hungry, cold, and alone trying to find my truth Great videos brother Be blessed 🙏
We are dreamers and we're at our best when we're dreaming, it's something most people can't do. Just make sure your to communicate your what you dream and create value for others. Attempting to actually bring these dreams to reality only brings me dread because I am tormented by daily schedules and consistency. The internet is the greatest thing to happen to INTPs.
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My biggest problem is getting out of my own head and actually doing things. We INFP's are great at thinking things but suck at carrying them out. It's so much simpler just to stay in the bubble and forget the real world.
fr
I stumbled upon this video that says, "we lack the ability to sit with things that are unpleasant.", and that's the reason why execution is hard for INFP. Because we are affected by our emotions, and not because we do have poor time management or self-control. Negative affects us negatively, and positive emotions affect us positively in doing things. The best way to do about this is to learn to regulate our emotions.
@@younicekeepgoing6290 Stoicism roolz...
Oh definitely we as infps definitely suck at actually taking action
Sometimes I feel like I'm not part of this world. As if I perceived him differently than others. When I'm alone, it's like I have my own world, but when I go out and meet people, I also see another world. It's so weird
An INFP here.. having a broken "INFP" day... you know what I mean. Disconnected and struggling... so it feels nice to have stumbled upon your video. Thank you
Having this right now haha. It’s like an emo kid day that no one really understands. I want to be alone but also crave social interaction it sucks
Damn, so it's not only me that has this. I am in that situation too rn
That’s why we here Doug
I wish you a much better day today. 🤍
Being an infp single mom now homeschooling and trying to run her own business. OmG I've been struggling lately.
Not gonna lie, I accidentally daydreamed through most of this... I should rewatch this... but I don’t wanna now :(
I relate so much to this
😂😂
Same
same
LMFAOOOO
I am an INFP and feel like I never fit in... I have a few close friends and I feel great with them but most of the time I feel like i’m not part of any group because they’re not my type and yeah, I just feel weird, does anyone else feel like this ?
Edit: omg thank you guysss, i’ve never looked back at my comment and I’m so happy with all the replies
I definitely feel that way. Don't really have any friends, and always feel like an outsider whereever I go. I've always had a hard time being in groups. I feel like I always become the quiet one, the outsider, the third wheel, the black sheep, etc. But I'm naturally a very introverted person, so I like being alone.
Definitely me! I would try and force myself to be like everyone around me but that would just make me feel even more uncomfortable and isolated. Instead I’m trying to embrace all this weirdness instead of rejecting it. I know now who comes in my life is special too because it takes a lot to enter this terror dome of a mind haha. You’re all good alone, and you’ll find your people.
reply if u want my snap or something because literally me
Yeah like I have friends but I feel like I don’t fit in like I love them but I feel like no one will truly know me because I never open up fully even if I try to, I know they care but I have just always felt out of place
Yeah same. I don't like my friends and they don't like anyone from the group either. We are just "fake friends". Which I am wondering how the hell did I end up having such friends to begin with.. Probably because I was desperate to fit in..
Tips to succeed as an INFP:
1. Clean your room.
2. Take a bath every day (probably the hardest one)
3. Brush your teeth every day.
4. Eat on time and eat healthy.
5. Talk to someone every day.
6. Read a book every day (probably the easiest one)
Found this on the INFP subreddit. I can't bother to link the post I'm too lazy for that
I don't read books except course books and novels
Having a daily routine, especially morning routine, helped me tremendously as an INFP. Sure I don’t follow it every single day, but I follow it on most days. And when I do, I am a lot happier. A cure for INFl is action. Figure out what it takes to get yourself to take action.
Exactly. Even if i follow just one thing in my routine it makes me so happy as if i won some battle.
I think that’s the problem about INFBs. Can’t taking actions.
routines. bah!
As someone working in the medical field. Amen. Routines are godammn exhausting but it’s what gets me further to who I want to become aka my idealized self. And on my off days (and I have them a lot) I just turn into a pile of goo and comfort myself with Oscar Wilde’s words of “Everything in Moderation, as well as moderation.”
Totally agree
In the softest voice.. “not a heart.. a triiiiiiiangle”
That was so kyoot ryt? Uwuuu
As an INFP, I sometimes feel like a spectator in the sidelines of a tennis match, but my gaze doesn't follow the ball. Everybody else does, heads going back and forth. I am just enjoying the fresh air, observing people, my mind having its own ball game. At times, I feel out of place in this crowd. What the hell am I doing here?
Me too but I have ADD lol
@@sorvex9 Oof, I have ADHD and am also an INFP…
Jesus helps
As an infp who started playing tennis last year, i can confirm so many times I unintentionally stop looking at the ball and focus on some random thing or thought, while the ball is still flying towards me. I wonder what it's like to be able to just watch one ball without intrusive thoughts for more than 20 seconds
@@sorvex9 Same! I noticed that many of us INFP’s have ADD.
Your voice is refreshingly comforting. It feels calming in the face of a noisy world.
agreed. I could go to sleep to this
It hears like he is nervous to speak loud. Well, so am I.
I don’t remember, but my daughter might’ve been sleeping. Or I was just quiet like normal. lol
I’m generally just around an audible level :)
@@GeekPsychology do you find people tend to listen to you more when you're at a quiet/audible level? or the opposite?
I know right. Got what i need
What exactly is that thing that INFPs have in common that makes us feel disqualified from the world? It's so powerful.
Freya Shipley the urge to do great things in the world/not settle, and then the inability to actually act on those great desires 🤷🏽♀️ that’s a good question you ask, I’m curious too
So true
@@Noelleelle omg that exactly me, I keep retaking the test like a grumpy toddler saying "I don't want to be an infp" but what you just said sums me up perfectly
Lloyd Barnes I don’t know if it’s just me or if it’s an INFP thing, but I’ve been super stubborn my whole life. If I don’t want to do something, I don’t do it. When I was almost a toddler, I refused once to pick up my toys for over an hour...did not lift a finger lol I feel like that persistence has stayed with me my whole life
@@Noelleelle yep, I'm very stubborn and will do absolutely nothing about things if I don't believe truly in them. Procrastination is something that followed me my whole life, and not finding a purpose can put me in really bad cycles of rumination.
Soon thirty and still struggle to choose my path. Interested in so much, can’t decide if I should become a carpenter, psychologist, marine biologist, artist etc. So hard goddamnit 😭😂
I'm 22 and I'm the same..why not try it all😂? Before you die at least...you've got time on your side at 30 you're still young imo
Do all of them at the end of your life you can say hey I tried them all and you grow and know yourself s bit more as you try. You can do it don't be afraid
Me too! I have a degree in middle school teaching, but they kicked me out of my job.. Experienced sexual harassment and bullying by the principal and collaegues.. They also told me I'm "dumb", "arrogant", "not authentic" and so on.. Made openly fun of me having no family, being curvy and feminine and stuff.. So evil and judgemental.. I'm working as a freelance translator now but guess I'll get a masters degree for library work.. More interested in ideas, constructs and stories anyway.. Sorry for the bad english
@apricot90 English is more than fine, sorr you had to go through that
I'm 32, been thru many many jobs, hated them all. Currently driving as an uber, it's not that I like it, it just seems to be least soul killing out of all others. It's like I'm in my own car with my own music, coffee etc. I still feel like I'm wasting my potential. I used to be like the best student in the entire school during my early education. Ended up with management degree which I never used (id hate to manage ppl). It's like I know I could do better but when I actually try it feels like the world is against me. Sucks....
Dreaming is so much easier than dealing with reality and sometimes I feel like it's driving me insane. But it's relieving to know that I'm not the only one feeling this way.
As an INFP, I am often misunderstood by my family and friends. Some of them called me a good for nothing even though they are not living life with integrity themselves. People often determine a person’s worth by their achievements and net worth, but not living a life of purpose and meaning
Exactly ugh I love my infp family ❤️ hope you’re doing well
They say that to put you down willingly that's their goal
Exactly
I thought I was the only one who felt this way. Especially abt the achievements (the ones THEY think are worthy) and net worth. I. An artist and it’s feast or famine sometimes but at least I feel like I’m living authentically ❤
I wouldnt ever again call such individuals friends anymore
"The more you fail the more you learn." This is powerful.
wow!
The more you fail , the more you are depressed .
The more you fail , the more you have chance to leave studies ..
No ..fail is not good in our world , even it's very rich of experiences and learning ..but still...🙃
I should be the smartest man alive 😂
Failure is necessary but not sufficient for that kind of learning, you HAVE to put the work in. Best of luck to all.
This was exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you! I'm a 71 year old INFP who has spent my whole life trying to fit myself into the societal dictates. And then always wondering why I never could stick to anything for more than about 3 years until I would have a major shake-up and change everything. Only to repeat. I finally see that my INFP nature was never acknowledged or appreciated. I did believe that I was uniquely flawed maybe permanently depressed and definitely overly emotional. No more for me. I will be authentic no matter what. It's all about balance isn't it?
Loved your comment here. I'm 73 and the same - now remembering all my life - since birth actually I would never be in one place more than 3 years. Since birth never fit in. As an INFP I have so many amazing talents that could change how millions of people think - TV shows - ans still don't know how to get them out there. Sherman is really helping and you - finding others who are like me and will now be our authentic amazing self.
Did you regularly change jobs? It's often said that the old generation prefer to stick to one job or company for life while the current young gen tend to job-hop.
So refreshing to hear from older infps! I'm 58 and watching videos and reading comments of younger people is sometimes discouraging- thinking, "it's too late for me."
I also tend to move every 4 years but I've been in my current place for 6 years and for the last two I've been obsessive about finding somewhere diff to live. A although I have had the same job for 20 years.. it's just a job, not a passion.
@@danam4536 I'm an INFP with the either good or bad fortune of being an artist dreamer. I had jobs when I was young, but none lasted for more than three years, thus the moving. The issue was always the same - I'm intelligent, was good at whatever I did and very clear about how to add to the success of a project. But when an owner or manager boss would repremand me or insult my intelligence or motives, make up things I saw as petty or untrue, especially if I spoke up and was put down - it would be the begining to the end, and I would finally quit. I think an INFP's wiring is too sensitive to endure abuse, at least mine is. So I chose to be self-employed. I think no matter what it is - a long term job or marriage - if you're being loved and accepted for who you are, praised and rewarded, then stick with it. I choose happiness, that's all.
@@daviddakanallison47 Very helpful insight. Thank you. ❤️
We aren't made for this world. But the world is made for us.
Fuarian wow... this hit me really hard.
I’d say it’s the opposite really,
i dont get it
no.
Ohhh, I used to talk about my school the same way! I'd say: "I may not be the perfect student for this school, but this school is the perfect one for me"
Grow sum skillz people! Seriously. I agree.
It’s not easy. Fake it until you make it. Stay out of your head (as much as humanly possible). Get confident now. Our lives are worth it.
Sarah S faking it goes against everything
Lois Rabies right, “faking it” is literally the contraire of what I believe in
Moonlight_cloud I know fuck that shit
The thing is I hate fake people.. faking my personality will make me hate me
Lmfao, great message, one tiny flaw is that your preaching what everyone else is preaching with no real solution. How tf do I "get out of my head". Are you even an infp?? Yes we can try to conform to societal expectations but we won't be fulfilled from it. This is the wrong message entirely. What infps need is to revel in there sensitive creativity. Create for themselves, not for others and be in a profession where they can help others. That's what will truely make them happy
the background makes it look like i'm getting a pep talk from a Guard in Skyrim
David Jacobs omg
omg ESPECIALLY TRUE WHEN HE SAID "SLAY YOUR DRAGONS"
Hes giving you a quest at the bannered mare😂
It's a pep talk on how to remove the arrow from your knee.
😂😂😂
Shakespeare and Van Gogh were both INFP types. We are amazing. Never give up guys ❤!
yes❤
Even Captain America 😉
keanu reeves too
That moment when it's literally hard to find two examples of famous people with your personality type without stumbling across someone who committed suicide 😅😶
Wait a sec..suicide victims
I've learned as an INFP that you don't have to worry about your Te inferior. Instead, focus on your tertiary Si. Be stringent about your routine and keep your environment absolutely clean and clutter free. Most people who have problems with INFP's have problems not with the INFP's warmth and friendship ability, nor their talents. The problem that people have with INFP's is that they are so often dysfunctional people. But you can't counter this by stressing out your Te inferior, you have to hit the 3rd function. It has to be an INFP's priority to be as functional as possible. INFP's are not disliked, they are just dysfunctional. As a personal anecdote, I learned later on that people thought I just looked sloppy and unkempt, and always seemed disorganized, and that caused me to get shafted. But no one ever had a problem with my sense of kindness or friendship making skills. People always admired my philosophical nature and linguistic and writing talents, my imagination. So I stressed about those things, rather than worrying about what the real problem was--which was that I wasn't so careful about grooming and being organized. So how do you fix it? You worry about your Si. You use segmented thinking to put your life into a carefully planned routine. For me this has also become a new part of my overall morality, it's not just an unimportant detail. At least...that's my story, but I think it can be applied in some sense to most INFP's.
That interesting
You called me out man lol
This is the detail I think is missing from this video. The “harsh truth”. Thank u for the comment!
I relate! Not only do I have an androgynous face, but I never really wanted to dress feminine growing up either. I would say my style fits who I am, someone from outer space. At least that's what I feel like lol. I did a project last October. I had saved my hair out, so I bleached it blonde, started dressing posh, with white turtlenecks and a black fancy coat. People were more accepting of me then and treated me like I was some upper-class nice martyr weirdo. It felt good tho. When I dress how I want and don't care about society people think I'm some super weird creepo lol. I hate that you have to conform to fit into society but... I guess that's life sometimes..
That was really useful to know. It's great getting advice from more experienced INFPs who've dealt with issues that INFPs generally face. Thank you very much for your comment.
as an infp I’ve always had trouble following schedules and routines, I despise them, they make me feel constrained and controlled whereas I like to feel free, this always ends up in me being behind in almost everything I do, I’m hoping to change this bcs I finally have a goal I want to work hard for
do a rputine that makes you feel good. i found out that exercising early at dawn makes me feel good so i stick to that
Yes, me too 😁
These thoughts patterns can definitely be challenging when goal setting 🏆
I've found affirmations to be helpful
Everyday, l repeat:
*I love routines and schedules because l can stick to them consistently while maintaining my individuality, creativity, spontaneity and freedom*
Ever read what Andreas Hofer says about intuitive neurotribes? It explains quite a lot these tendencies and their real application. What we are built for inside.
We’re not meant for this world to be honest. To go to work at a 9-5 to be told to do the most mundane tasks every damn day until retirement is not ya. We yearn to make a difference, we yearn to express ourselves, we yearn to be one with nature but this world doesn’t award that. In order for us to make it, we have realize that we are quite controlling. Henceforth, we must take control. Become entrepreneurs, where we control the vision and our own expression. Take over the arts, where we’re free to express ourselves. Believe it or not, volunteering to work within the ropes of this world will leave us feeling unfulfilled, and metaphorically in shackles!
Title: INFP, How to fix your life.
Me:
*I'm not ready for that conversation.* 🙂
I’m waiting!
LOL I was literally debating whether or not to watch it
This....
Yea I’m not either
@@Natallz ME LOL
Struggling to find a way to break out of my patterns....I’m 23 and I can’t drive because I’m too anxious, therefore I can’t get around easily and be independent, still in school full time so i can’t make much money, i have a very boring and soul crushing part time job and I feel exhausted all the time bc nothing is feeding my soul. I feel very very very stuck and miserable. I don’t know how to get from here to where I want to be. This helped a little bit. I just need to start gaining some skills. a new job, a drivers license, some new artistic skills. all that could go a long way.
I relate to this so much.
It's insane how much INFPs have in common. I got my driving licence a few years ago but I never use it because whenever I'm behind the wheel I get super anxious. At the age of 25 I still struggle to find something I can make a living out of (even though I'm almost finished with my studies - the only thing left is to write my thesis with which I'm really struggling with... it seems so mundane and I know I'm never gonna use my degree because I lost interest in what I've been studying). Just like you I also feel stuck but for me since I started working out it helps so much. It puts me in some sort of a schedule which I'm trying to apply on other aspects of my life. Getting distracted and procrastinating is still some of my biggest weaknesses but I gotta focus on my end goal to beat them.
I feel the exact same way except that I'm 3 years younger
18, I dont have my license either. Driving scares me, I dont trust myself enough and I dont want to hurt anyone on the road
Get out of the 9-5 rat race you need to enjoy life or you will feel stuck forever.
wow, your eye contact is so authentically strong even through a monitor...
im An INFP type personality that had made the decision that suicide was always an option. I’ve spent most of my my time alone in this thought pattern but introspectively rationalized that as long as I kept it to myself. I subconsciously believed and reinforced this thought and I’m very appreciative of your video. I understand your train of thought and laughed a bit when you mentioned that it is hard to figure out what to even eat sometimes. I’m always alone by choice but I hate it. Time to turn this franchise around. Lol
Hey Ryan, I'm also am an INFP, and know how it is! But, I think we are here to enjoy life, and be kind to people, and we are the ones that will change the world by being an INFP. Go out and help the helpless, be a force for good, and love your life! You are here for a true and good purpose, yes, this world is an evil place, but...we are here to change that, and we can help ourselves by learning lessons from life, and loving ourselves, and loving others. You are a neat person Ryan, you are here to help bring light out into the open.
Ryan Babb if you need help making decisions download an 8ball app.. you’ll thank me later and clear your mind sometimes stay safe💕
ive had the same experience wow
I don’t have any social media profiles so I was surprised to see responses to my comment. I think I just felt compelled to say that I related to realizing that I might be a certain type of person but I felt stupid doing so. I feel less stupid now and even though I know Intellectually that people can’t be simply categorized I do think that certain people have certain tendencies that are innate. Props to the maker of this video and thanks to those who responded.
Lol!
As an INFP, I think Investing is important for us. When you're financially independent, you can do anything that you're passionate about without having to worry about money. Look at the things differently and start see the bigger picture, guys! Good luck 🤞
Stuck in your room and comatose. This is exactly what I have done for the past 15 years.
I wrote today that I simply hate that I exist , and I hate that I have awareness of this existence. Lol
I wrote also that I have to come to terms with the fact that I exist. I have to move around, talk to people face conflicts. I hate conflict.
As an infp I have found journaling to be useful. It allows you to venture deeper into your thoughts and sort through the tangled mess. It’s awesome because then you can revisit and reflect on those thoughts at a later time.
I’d recommend looking into bullet journaling for any infp that wants to build up their self discipline. For me I could do something as long as I had motivation but motivation always goes away after a while and I would stop doing things that bettered myself because I no longer had motivation and lacked any self discipline. Bullet journaling has helped that tremendously and once I write a goal down I don’t forget it and it pushes me to accomplish the important things in life. In order to get better and accomplish the things you want you have to have the right mindset and build up habits that help you succeed which is something I’ve had to learn
James 420 Great idea, thanks for the tip
Thanks i'll look it up
Journals are extremely helpful. Everyone should track their life and progress towards the things that matter most!
Ooh yes!! But setting up your own bullet journal can get you stuck if youre trying to perfect everything. I bought a planner from "Mi Goals" and it has a great layout, really helped with starting out my productivity journal. Or you could also try the "Fabulous" app 😊
@@melissatran4780 I might try that route, I did want to try doing a bullet journal, I even bought one.. but I never started it because I felt lost and stuck in how to actually start it, how it should look, etc. I definitely could use it though.
INFJ here trying to find ways to cheer up my INFP friend 😞😞😞
Your not alone. I think there are quite a few of us in this comment section. My infp friend is someone who I consider a friend for life, but she has had some hard stuff happen and is in a lonely place. Funny thing is, of all the people I know she is the only one my infj gifts cannot help yet is the one I want to help the most.
You two are incredible friends. Bless you both! ❤️
Hug your INFP
Give a kitty to your INFP
and lastly
Make them clean themselves and their room. I'm probably too late.
I always see INFJs in every INFP-related video watching it for a loved one. Must be one of the reasons why I love ur types so much!! I promise u ur INFP friend is gonna appreciate it!
@@human1880 this is so true
I'm 32 and still finding out what my place in this life will be. I'm scared to choose a direction because I know it will be hard for me to commit and actually finish something. Been there, done that, it never worked. I'm working as a cleaner and just know I can be more than that, if only I would finish something, stop dreaming of making something out of my life and actually start participating in this real world. Problem is I have so many interests, no discipline and the need to procrastinate my day away. I absolutely hate this, also because people know I'm like this and they tend to protect me against myself when I come up with a new brilliant plan of what I'm gonna be when I grow up...Also, I have the feeling I'll never do just that. But finding out a lot of you struggle with this too makes me feel less alone, less weird. I'm so happy I found mbti, all of you guys,...it makes me understand myself more so I can finally try to make peace with who I am.
Wuaw..38 here and going through the same thing
Me too
I feel like I lack self identity and am constantly searching for it. I want to be everything so bad that I end up being nothing at all
Yikes... Ouch. Not a bad thing...it just hit me, hard. Exactly what I feel.
Same!!! T_T
Nothing wrong with being nothing
Over identification can be harmful
Try making a list of things that are unique to you 💖
Being an Infp means the temptation to dream life away is huge. For me, I always feel disappointed with myself before I start. I found if I just do the thing without allowing myself to become overwhelmed by expectation, I’m much more content. It’s hard though, when you know you can just pretend and it feels better than reality in that moment.
I think, once you find your true purpose, the temptation to dream your life away will slowly fade. It's all about centering yourself, grounding yourself, determination, discipline, consistency and focus.
You'll never know unless you try 💕
I spent 2 years in a very deep agonizing depression. I barely did just enough to function, I was the most miserable I've ever been in my life. I truly believed I was too sensitive for this world. I found out, through the rekindling of friendships, that I am capable of so much more. I am not lazy, I can work hard. I started working hard I started proving things to myself. I work hard I work 14 hour days, I'm exhausted but I'm also SO FREAKING HAPPY! I love the people I work with, I love what I do. I have established a good reputation. I don't make a whole lot but the reward of knowing what I'm capable of means so much to me!
Hey, what job do you do?
@@bandeppert At that time I was working at a river resort. Currently I work at the hospital full time. I'm only a nurse tech right now but I'm planning on going to school to become an LPN.
We need an INFP millionaire to tell us how the hell they did it lol. If there even is one??
Fuck it... give me 5 to 7 years I got you! haha :)
Not a millionaire but T.R.R Tolkien is famous for writing lord of the kings series/ the hobbit, also Shakespeare was an infp 🤷🏽♀️
@Me I think noticed theyre very rarely comedians but are almost always artists or poets. The only "comedians" that are INFP usually self express through an artistic medium, and arent your stand up type (ex: i feel like JaidenAnimations fall under INFP)
People who get paid for dreaming....novelists, musicians. Also actors, especially character actors (feel into the role, then become it).
Why would you want to be a millionaire?
It's exhausting being an INFP. In the end the only thing that motivates me is learning from my failures.
As an INFP it so hard for me to go out, make new friends and connect. But I know now I need it very much. I'm at a point in my life that I finally understood that I have to put an effort into creating my reality if I want it to change into the one I'm dreaming about. I gave myself new responsibilities, started consciously changing. Finally I took the wheel and started changing the course of my ship (and actually took it out from the bay if you know what I mean). But then the quarantine happened and seriously I got so sad and defeated. All my efforts and the small steps I took got squashed. I'm good at sitting in the house, being alone, not attending gatherings...but I did so much to finally get out and the worst part is I was finally ready. I was only begining my new journey and now I can't continue. For me mentally this is the hardest part of the situation we are all in with the pandemic. But I will spend my time productively and I will remember about my dreams and plans. Hopefully there will be a place for them after all this.
What’s helped me the most is actually to stop trying to be what I’m not and dive into what I am wholeheartedly and without fear to the best of my abilities. I’ve started to realize a few years ago, now 32, that I’ve put a ton of energy into other peoples expectations of me and while much of it has grown me, that can’t lead me to where I’m made to be. I have to embrace growing my weaknesses, but even more so dive into my passions and strengths knowing no matter how counter worldly wisdom it may seem. Being who I am is the only thing that will satisfy me or keep me passionate and fulfilled.
To all my fellow INFP's out there who need support, I can understand how much you struggle and how much you fight. Please stay strong, you're important and you deserve the happiness. Give yourself a chance! Take small steps towards your goals and don't overwhelm yourself. Push yourself (Not too hard) towards what you want for yourself and you will get it!! Sending positive energy to y'all!!
- From your fellow INFP
I work as a counselor. Today,I used your video to help an INFP cult victim who was feeling really trapped. It gave him a foundation to work from. Your explanation was so awesomely targeted to his personality type that you could get through to him where I couldn't. Thank you. I think you probably saved /changed his life. Thanks for reaching out in ways that help. He very much dwells in that wordless feeling place. You get that and know how to bridge that gap. Thanks for giving him a road map.
ur voice is like comforting waves through my brain
jimins thighs asmr
jimins thighs ikr
Army✋💙
Same for me
I've been watching these types of videos , I've fallen in this INFP personality type explanation and this is the maybe the third time I've come across an ARMY ☺
I'm from Japan. I found your channel just recently and your videos are helping me love myself a lot!! It sometimes sucks to be a little different from others especially in Japan but now I have better understandings of who I am and what I can achieve in this life and stuff. ありがとうございます!
I m living in Japan too. It is great to know there is a fellow INFP who watches the same video as I do. Hope we can all be our true selves and achieve better to our full potential!
Hello! Just curious what personality type do most people in Japan seem to be ? 😊
How easy is Japan for an INFPs? Moving to Japan one day is my lifelong wish.
I need tips to survive in Japan as an INFP. Help.
@@XxMyvxRocksx382xX I don't know much about other personalities but an article said ISFP seems to be very popular here.
I feel as an INFP that we're here to help people emotionally (well it's the case for me). Countless times I've been hurt by people only to end up helping them realise why they behave the way they do. And then they get therapy or grow as a person. I feel happy for them but it's a drain for me. I wouldn't change helping anyone grow, but I sometimes wonder what's in it for me in the long run? To always be that emotional catalyst for people? I don't know, being an INFP definitely isn't easy. Sometimes wish I wasn't one.. but then again I wouldn't be so unique either. You get used to being lonely, and not fitting in. It's like a way of life now, low expectations of people because they just don't understand and usually let you down. It's like being in a room just looking out at the world pass you by.. both figuratively and sometimes literally. I feel like I'm wasting my life because I can't push myself to do what I really want to out of fear, fear of not being good enough, fear of embarrassment. Wonder is anxiety a symptom of being an INFP?
Exactly you’re not alone fellow infp here ❤️ and yes I believe anxiety can be more of a trait of being an infp
Same..I have helped people countless times..its like when ever my friends need advice or support I can give them an ocean of emotional strength...but it hurts when i get betrayed by them
This is the only channel that connects to INFPs without degrading them, but also not putting them in a pedestal. Thank you!! 💕
This is so helpful! As an INFP I always feel like I don’t “fit in” with the world around me. I’m currently trying to find ways to adapt to the world while still staying true to myself so I can make my impact in the most efficient way!
Idk of this is anyone else but he insult finding that balance is what I center my life around
As ungrateful as this may sound, I realized my first real purpose in life was to not be like my parents. I've never smoked, never been a partier, didn't even try alcohol until after my 21st birthday (I know, I'm not that kind of fun person). They wanted me to go to university when they were married, but then they changed their minds since they couldn't support me after their divorce, but I went anyway, thanks to grants, scholarships, subsidized loans, and working part-time my entire academic career. They've never left their comfort zone. After graduating from university, I moved to Japan for work.
I know they did what they could, and the experiences we went through helped me become adaptable, resourceful and self-reliant, but I'm still trying to unlearn some of the toxic behavior I inherited. Finding a purpose will be a lifelong endeavor it seems, but as long as I stay focused and open-minded in the present, I'm sure it will just come to me without having to worry about it.
I feel so seen. I literally almost cried watching this. I used to feel capable and be able to see my potential, but the older I am, the harder it gets, the more it seems like I just... can’t do things like other people can. Thank you for this push. I really needed it!
This is my life right now 🙈 I recently asked my boyfriend, an INTJ Type 8 entrepreneur (we get along really well, I swear!) to help me get back on track with my hopes, dreams and passions. I used to be incredibly creative, enjoying art, stories and writing, especially. But over the years, fear, doubt and some really shitty choices pretty much choked it out of me. Nothing I tried seemed to work, until I got the idea to set my super logical, practical boyfriend on the problem, and now I have a whole plan laid out for me to pick myself up again 🤩 it's all basically implementating what you're saying here 😁 I created my first piece of art in years today, and I'm SO chuffed 🥳🎨 I never would have thought of doing it if it hadn't been for your videos though, so thank you! Keep up the awesome work, you rock! 😍🤗
One thing that helps me as an infp is bullet journaling. I do bad with strict schedules everyday but I also do bad if I have no idea what goals I want to achieve today or this week. It has helped me accomplish the important things in life to me like making sure I workout everyday and study the foreign language I’m learning. I’d recommend looking into it if you want to help yourself in growing your self discipline and creating new habits. For me I would always give up on something once the motivation is gone so I’ve had to seriously build up my self discipline and remember the end goal of what I want to accomplish! Also love your profile pic
That's so sweet of him. You're really fortunate to have someone who supports you if you're not at your best!
I love reading this, because my bf is also INTJ and I have also been relying on him to help me get my life back on track. He's very practical and logical, and he made things seem so much easier than they seemed in my head. I still struggle with actually doing things, but I feel like I accomplished quite a few things thanks to him. It is not easy for him, but he still helps me put things in perspective.
It has been 2 years since your comment, but I related to it, so I wanted to leave a comment here too. We can do it!!
@@felizmentearmy7040 Yes you can 👌👏 👌
As an INFP, I can be motivated and do things but as soon as I get motivated, it always dwindles away and I burn out. This video is a reminder that just because I have feelings doesn't mean I have to let them control me. Your words are wisdom and make an impact to those of us INFPs who want to make constant improvement in our lives. Thank you.
When I hear this I feel like you’re talking to an injured INFP type. Touching on what you said about trying new things to increase skills and life experience. It’s important for the Infp to try out many different things but also to be a master of one. At least for a time in order to be able to be an independent person and make it in the world.
I commend you for encouraging infps. If Alicia keys and Stephen Colbert and John Lennon can make it.... but they had to focus on just one thing.
Agreed! Focusing on one thing for a while is the key.
I'm a young adult who is a INFP myself and there's time that I feel like I'm not going anywhere. I feel stuck sometimes, and think what I would bring to the world, and if it's something even worth bringing out for people. I always daydream, and in my own little world as a way of relieving myself from the struggles. I'm scared to go out on my own. I feel like I won't be strong enough to help others or even myself.
“The world is what it is” noooooooooooo 😭
The Invitation
It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for
And if you dare dream of meeting your heart’s longing.
It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love
For your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon . . .
I want to know if you’ve touched the center of your own sorrow.
If you have been opened by life’s betrayals
Or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own
Without moving to hide it, or fade it or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy,
Mine or your own.
If you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy
Fill the tips of your fingers and toes
Without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic,
To remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
I want to know if you can disappoint another
To be true to yourself.
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
And not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty even when it’s not pretty
Everyday
And if you can source you own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure yours and mine
And still stand on the edge of the lake
And shout to the silver of the full moon, “Yes.”
It doesn’t interest me to know where you live
Or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up after the night
Of grief and despair,
Weary and bruised to the bone
And do what needs to be done for the children.
It doesn’t interest me who you know and how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire
With me and not shrink back.
It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom
You have studied.
I want to know what sustains you from the inside
When all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself
And if you will truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.
Oriah Mountain Dreamer May 1994
Beautiful and very touching.
🥺
“you’re just wilting and slowly dying if you don’t go out there and try to gain skills to make your life better”
me, a year into this pandemic, confined to my room: 😐
I'm sorry I laughed when you said at the beginning "you need to find some skills- I'm sorry if that's not a sugar coated way of saying it" because it really was nice and also helpful (infp here)
am i too weak that i cried over this?
love your videos by the way ❤️
Our inner self is getting some validation on this video. My inner self was very hurt from being ignored all my life so this is what gets me in this video.
Zzul Ma Yes. Same.
Ricky I agree. And you are so beautiful, by the way. 😍
Sorry if I'm being creepy. 😅
💜🌸
Sometimes crying is a relief
I cried in the first 3 minutes because I know it’s all basically true. It’s okay to cry :)
At first when I watched this and saw the comments, I had a really uneasy and helpless feeling. Never deep dived into the MBTI personalities. So I never before thought of my INFP-ness as crippling until then. In fact, I was proud of my NFP nature. I feel it gave me an emotional intelligence, and made me so in tune w others feelings, which is a superpower in itself.
I needed a moment for the video to sink in positively. And Im thankful cause I do think we INFPs need constant reminder to be more present, and to make the impact that we can. Cause we really can! Don’t do yourself like that, and think that you are helpless and doomed. My best friend is a fellow INFP, and she is vibrant, talented, and loved! I know for sure she will make it in this world. Thats why I know I can too, and so can you.
We are actually in the perfect situation right now to build skills, and unlearn toxic habits. So I guess thats a silver lining to this whole pandemic situation 😌
I’m an INFP male married to an ESTJ female. I love her but I’m glad that I saw this!
I had to find a career that fits my personality. Now I am a therapist and I feel that I am changing the world... slowly but I have seen a difference in some of my clients.
The other thing that helped is acceptance of my emotions and the fact that I do enjoy them even if society says I shouldn’t. I am a much happier person now than I was 15 years ago. I like who I am 75% of the time!
Thank you for the video! (43 year old INFP)
Thanks for sharing - 22 yr old INFP
Deja vu
22 as well, and I’m so happy you found meaning and purpose in life:) It’s inspiring:))
congratulations! On both feeling your feelings and becoming a therapist(my dream too) :D
@@monica1808 thank you!
Hello Matt. I am a female INTJ and my enneagram type is 5w4. I watched your video because I have INFP male friend and I want to learn about him so that, in my INTJ way, I can help him (not 'fix' him). Understand, support, use my abilities to show him I love him.
I am 64 years old and when I was young and unaware of my unusual personality type, I struggled with life. I've since found out that I am an HSP (yes, an INTJ can be a HSP too lol). I felt, and feel, like I don't belong in this world. It's too much survival of the fittest, dog eat dog. Navigating the world left me with many bruises but I can say that I see myself as a success. Not rich or famous kind of success, but that I am still here, engaged with life and happy with my uniqueness. I have no specific advice except to emphasize that one must keep on trying. In the face of all your apparent failures (from the world's perspective) be willing to dust yourself off and keep going. Lord, is that hard! My spirituality has done for me what people, jobs, money could not do. It gave me validation of my presence in the world.
Thank you for this wonderful video.
my problem is i let my emotions control me
Im an INFP woman in her fifties and I don't say this lightly but I believe I have had a spiritual awakening I used to hide away from the world I felt like I was lost and I was an alien LOL but in the last two years I've changed significantly even my looks have changed I have taken to going out ballroom dancing and meeting new people all the time sometimes I feel a little shy but I go and do it anyway I feel so much happier. I also believe the job I do makes a difference one person at a time I work with the elderly I am a hairdresser mostly working with dementia and Alzheimer's patients I thank you for your videos
I think our greatest curse is the Fi-Si loop and the doubt we have in ourselves at the end. Your point about how that unconscious belief that you can’t do anything to improve your situation (Ne & Te MIA) is often the single biggest thing keeping you stuck where you are really hits home for me.
There’s a very famous quote from the movie Scent of a Woman: “I always knew what the right path was. Without exception, I knew. But I never took it. You know why? It was too damn hard.” Translation: You ALWAYS have a choice, but most people are not willing to pay the price.
Hey fam, first thing... you got this! One thing that’s helped me grow is practicing stoicism and adopting a minimal lifestyle, i can get lost in the sauce sometimes... by clearing my mind and focusing on the path(stoic) and clearing my environment(minimalist)I’ve see major improvements. When I do get stuck in my head it’s not as difficult to rebound. Hope this helps someone
Thank you.
Honest, heartfelt thank you. It no longer feels like I am existentially alone. It no longer feels as if I can't do anything to change that situation. It no longer feels as if my power was stripped away from me by a bunch of invisible goblins in the forest. I feel like I can do something to feel like I know I deserve to feel and how I want to feel.
You're a guide, my man.
I'm going to change myself so that I can allow myself to feel fulfilled. I will allow myself to feel joy and autheticity flowing through my veins.
Yeah, there will be bad days and bad times, but now I know that I'm not alone in this invisible struggle, and that really has a huge impact on who I am and how I percieve myself.
I accept myself as I am, not what my weaknesses and mistakes make me think of myself.
Thank you for this video, man. I wish you and all of you struggling right now the best in your search for meaning.
Beautifully said...wish I had your strength and positivity.
As an enfp i really felt struck by this. Nice comment section as well. I need to hang around more infp's ppl. Keep it up guys
I am an infp who has anxiety and maladaptive daydreaming
edit: bruh i got diagnosed with adhd
And imma tell you its really hard dude
Same dude
Me too! Our mind is too distracting for us to focus on the outer world.
Yesssss I wish I could cut my head off... Idk pffff. I'm exhausted..
I- wtf you just described my whole life
BRO ME TOO!
We all have a role to play in this world, firstly! As a fellow INFP myself I'd love to voice/remind us how truly special we are in world! We are meant to shine our lights & stand separate from the masses for a purpose! Our gifts are meant to stand apart from the "sheep" 😊🤟💜
Lovely , positive, helpful. My mantra for a number of years was “ I am a kind and thoughtful person and I deserve better.” Things did eventually get so much better and now I do my best to help others when I can in small,thoughtful ways.
I'm 40, and I feel like life is passing me by, and I'm just ... stuck, for far too many reasons.
I need to let this video settle in my mind and heart a while, really take it in.
I had an epiphany: My dad was INFP. I'm sure of it. So many things make sense now. :(
I'm nearly 40 too
There's always room to change at any age ❤
Don't lose hope 🤞
As an infp I appreciate this. The way he talks about life and how to navigate resonates.
I love how calming you sounded throughout the whole video. It really felt like it was coming from a truly authentic loving place. Like "you can do this. You can get out of this funk."
I am an INFP and I can't imagine not being an entrepreneur and working for myself. I would highly recommend any INFP to document or at least think about their favorite hobbies/gifts/talents (I know documenting is difficult, just try) Start a side hustle, explore and get the ball moving. It can be a difficult road but for me finding complimentary individuals to perform the tasks and who have the organization skills I don't have allowed me to bring my dreams and creations to life.
It’s so refreshing to see there is individuals like myself. I often felt “weird” or out of place. I would hide some of values/interests from my friends because they weren’t aligned with others in my environment. Knowing that I’m an INFP-T explains that. Keep up the good work!
INFP’s, keep pushing and never give up! The day is perfect, even when it’s storming outside 😁.
Peace and balance to all!
It is often said that geographical solutions don’t work when it comes to a spiritual malady, however, you seem to be thriving in Japan and I wonder to what degree, if any, you accredit your success to having had the guts to make a radical change of setting. By the way, that’s a beautiful library setting. You seem to have a really great head on your shoulders. I agree with what you’re saying - that forcing myself out into the world is good for me - that’s when I’ve managed to make little leaps that have allowed my life to change. I know I have basic capabilities that I have developed out. Although I very much enjoy my alone time, I also get cabin fever and always feel better when I force myself out the door. It hurts my brain when I try to figure out what is this internal barrier that impedes my being ready, willing and able to get myself out the door. Ironically, I’m watching you on the same screen that makes it too easy for me to stay in. I can spend so much time watching CNN, MSNBC, and other content that does not ultimately feed my spirit well... and yet, I go back to it again and again. I hope this positive use of screen connectivity will be my bridge to participating in real life again. I don’t know if it’s relevant, but I’ve also just recently discovered the enneagram model of personality demarcation and I’m pretty sure I’m a 9 on that system. I was very interested to learn that most 9’s are not INFP as I would have thought it to be somewhat of a natural fit, but obviously that’s from a fairly specific point of view. I look forward to looking at more of your ideas, Sherman. It would appear that you have discovered a winning formula for our people. I know you have your own website (and good on you by the way for developing your Internet proficiency to the point where you’re able to reach out to others of us in a variety of ways) but for those of us who grew up pre-internet, i.e., Gen-X and beyond, have you ever considered writing a book on how to be a successful INFP-9? I no were a fairly small minority of the general population, but I bet it would appeal to other intuitive feelers as well as other enneagram types such as 2 and 6. Anyway, I would buy your book.
To be able to get on in life, support myself and yet not compromise my values was a huge challenge for me. I chose to be a nurse and basically it saved me. Talking to ppl is easy because the script is already there , you just ask the patient about themselves and take it from there. Already the type of work is already very patient focused so I just avoided the management bs by staying as close to my patients as possible. I will be retiring in a year or so, it has been a good career for me. I feel I have been able to help ppl.
This was almost painful to hear, but very much needed thank u:)
I got to a point where i was so stagnant, was constantly in my head. Until I realised I should bring out what's in my head into my reality as much as possible. I would sit in the park alone, make my living space a utopia, be unapologetically myself and make my reality the reality I see in my head. the negative to that is I find a lot of other people uninteresting...
INFPs have so much to say and take part in.
They can do so much, like anything that has to do with the arts or helping others. Painting, writing, counseling, teaching, and advocacy works.
They are good representatives for peace.
I wish heads of governments were INFPs.
Sincerely yours,
Your revering and loving brother,
INFJ.
This was a very INTP logical way of analyzing and dealing with life. It's strange to hear a message of changing your outlook so much it resembles a different personality type.
It seemed a little vague, but as any Perceiver, we might expect a list of what to change and an explanation of how it will affect and improve things. For example, I'm not sure how learning an instrument will change the world (me being a little facetious)
I suffer with a lot of mental illness related things (I won’t go into it) but as I’m growing up the best way for my to cope with the stress of life is to remind myself that NOTHING MATTERS. Literally- nothing- matters. So why not do what I want? I want to paint - I want to run - i want to dress the way I want to dress and befriend who I want to befriend and go places I want to go. Nothing matters. This is the only way I can give myself motivation for life and the basis for all my ideals. I have to constantly remind myself to forgive myself, and to try my best to do what I want to do. I just want to live a slow life enjoying the things I enjoy.
Yeah instead of laying down and thinking about what skills you should learn pick one thing and be fully present while doing it.
Im wearing almost same oversized wool sweater right now, and this is how i feel connected emotionally to this guy 😭😂
Oh my .... you are the reason I don’t hate being an INFP anymore (and Jobn Mayer 😅) ... ❤️
Watching this makes me feel less lonely at my down time. You know where you get too absorbed for hours and forget sleeping and eating.
I'm a scared person. The world will find out how akward I am. I start to sweat when I have interactions with the check out lady or have to make a phone call. But I believe in having a purpose. Wanting to make an impact. Being kind. I care about others and how they feel. And I love art and anything that feeds my soul. Yep, INFP
hey im very similar to what you said. I even started an art journal recently 😂 i feel awkward around people, a while back i made the choice to speak only when spoken to so I dont have the chance of stuttering :o it make me feel better that I'm not the only one like this, I hope you are well !♡
I am an INFP-A, although I have seen how i used to be an INFP-T before I ever took this personality test just a little over a week ago. I follow the David Hawkins consiousness level chart. I 1 million percent know I can make a positive impact in the world. This video popped up for me. 😅 and I LOVE looking like a weirdo! If us INFP-T, can also switch over to INFT with the A (Assertiveeve) even for a few minutes, people will see the confidence in us and want to follow our love and kindness. I have witnessed this happen in my own life. People want to lead with Love! Some just need to be shown how to. That's why we are here! ❤❤❤❤❤. It was so great that this video showed up on my feed.
I love that you speak so quietly. It doesn't make the content less significant . :)
Hey Sherman, I just wanted to say thank you for these infp vids, I've been following you for quite some time now. I'm not an INFP myself (I'm an ISTJ) and your videos bring me that little bit closer to understanding my INFP boyfriend. He's a very guarded person and keeps to himself, but when he's in a good mood I get to see his more playful side. Lately he's been very moody and instead of telling me head on what his issues are he goes about it in a "roundabout" fashion through passive aggressive jokes. He only tells me his issues when it's already too late. I would love to be a pillar of strength for my INFP man but sometimes it's hard to goddamn read him!
Passive aggressiveness comes out when we don’t have enough time connecting to ourselves or feel pressured outside too much... he might need some more alone time ^^
Or maybe he’s in a bad place right now and needs support. One can never tell lol. But seriously, just ask him about those and validate his experience.
IMO processing everything, thoughts emotions, internally can be daunting for infp’s. For me it’s a challenge to integrate my feelings productively into my relationship when it seems so easy for my wife (enfp) who just says what she feels all the time.
Hi, I started keeping away from my ex because I was stressed from work (overworked), and she had made a comment I was struggling with personally and I was too afraid to confront her about it because I did not want to seem petty. We had planned a date but I forgot that I had also volunteered to work that same day at a free health clinic for kids. When I told her I wanted to move our date to a few hours later, she told me to cancel my volunteer work for that day instead. She apologized immediately but I was worried that such a thing would cross her mind.
My opinion. Less pressure and more "kisses and I love yous" will help him feel more aligned.
"A triangle, not a heart" *smirk*
How do you, random guy from a random channel TH-cam recommended, already see inside my head xD
I love your videos! It is awesome to feel understood!
I can't recommend INFPs enough to do an emotional mastery course! There are solutions to our emotional type... that is to learn about emotions and to master them.
It's cool that I can change my own core values and beliefs by changing who I think I am.
You know, though it might seem like a strange match, my husband is an ISTP. A few might think that wouldn’t exactly be a match made in heaven, and well, we do sometimes clash a little, but to be honest, one thing he has really taught me to is to approach things a lot more objectively. He is a huge problem solver, and a fantastic listener. My own self-worth has really gotten better since I met him, and he, too, has learned to trust with an open heart. 🥰 We’re both a couple of artisans and workaholics, so we feed off each other in that way, too.
Not sure if you mentioned this, or if it might even hold true, but I think we can try to change something on an upper level of the pyramid by changing the things that lie below it. You can't just wake up one day and change your identity altogether. You can however, change your environment to help support different behaviours from the one you currently have, which would in turn end up changing what things you can achieve, which will end up changing your beliefs over time, and ultimately you'll identify yourself with that person. Say, suppose (and I'm giving this example to help myself out), you want to change the identity of being unmotivated, or slow, you can't just change your belief and make it happen right away. No, you have to place yourself in an environment where you are forced (doesn't work so well) or encouraged (this works better for INFPs) to develop healthier behaviours - like sleeping and eating at specific hours. Once you have healthier behaviours in place, over time you'll be capable to handle more things because you have that much extra energy. And when you realise you can do it, you'll go like - damn, I didn't think I could, but now I can. Finally, you change your identity this way.
Eat right, sleep right, get some exercise ... the secret wisdom of the ancients!
Exactly. Aspiring with Te is a sure fire way to reach integration with your entire system. Unhappiness in INFP’s can usually be related to relying too much on our feelings which is good but so is ration/logic. Gotta get that balance.
So in a nutshell, your video is about, "you are what you believe, and make a decision to get outside your comfort zone and put into action your dreams".
I am an INFP. Thanks for the insight. I will rewatch this video a lot better when I am not distracted by something else.
That’s right.
Make it a point to not be distracted should be on that list too ;)
@@GeekPsychology lol. That's right. Lol
;)
It's absolutely insane that some of us share such a deep seated set of universal perceptions and impulses.
I've felt like an INFP since I was three years old and tried to 'runaway' by riding my tricycle to the Masonic Library three blocks away climbing up on the left Sphinx and begging for it to Take me away to where it was from
I've been on that journey, sometimes only in my head, sometimes out in the great unknown, hungry, cold, and alone trying to find my truth
Great videos brother
Be blessed 🙏
This isn’t just for INFPs this is literally anyone who feels lost or unworthy. But I’m also an INFP 😂
I'm constantly wandering and struggling.. flawed is accurate. Wilting is accurate.
We are dreamers and we're at our best when we're dreaming, it's something most people can't do. Just make sure your to communicate your what you dream and create value for others. Attempting to actually bring these dreams to reality only brings me dread because I am tormented by daily schedules and consistency. The internet is the greatest thing to happen to INTPs.