The INFJ I knew actually enjoyed conversation with people, but mostly in effort to understand people. He couldn’t comprehend the point of the youtube comment section though. It was kind of sweet.
If you dont walk your talk... As an INFJ I question whether or not you have a soul or if you arent an evil demonic robot. Haha. I cannot comprehend not meaning what you say and saying what you mean.... -_-
As an INFJ, I am a SHOW ME person, not a tell me. Telling me is an extra wasted step, whereas if they just show me, I can make an immediate assessment of the person. Tell me until you are blue in the face, but it is all just smoke and mirrors.
Yes! I just said to a friend two days ago show me don’t tell me. We need to independently decide for ourselves devoid of anyone else’s opinions, influences, or emotions. However we will listen to people one on one and try and help them until we turn blue.
@J No...We INFJs only "slam the door" when we have been abused or taken advantage of...Will we let you back in?...Yes but we will never trust or look at you the same way again.
INFJ don't want to wear the t-👕 I'm with stupid. We don't suffer fools gladly. We are rebellious mostly in an intelligent way. We see the backslash will come but we will do it anyway may be spontaneous, go slow way a walk away or some way. We will do the the golden rebellion or the Phoenix rebellion. Golden rebellion very social, Phoenix rebellion kind of a burning light where everyone will remember your name as the fools pick up the pieces.. Like Lina Inverse says in her battle cry while her enemies are running for their lives, "Let the fools before me be destroyed "😜😁😝!
@@xoxxobob61 yeah i agree with u but me personally Its really hard to read me.. i slam the door on someone without them knowing... if they interact with me ill treat them kindly but there wont be any real connection... I won’t go to them to talk but I won’t ignore them either... when I don’t like someone I won’t show it even though i can easily see if someone doesn’t like me...the reason for door slamming is usually we can sense fakeness if u know what i mean...
You are absolutely right about INFJ's not being changed by any one's opinion. We are simultaneously chameleons, excessively sensitive and unchangeable. The chameleon and aspect is only on the surface and the sensitivity is emotional, but our core identity is unshakeable and we will walk through the world completely alone if that's what we have to do to maintain our identity.
It's not about be unchangeable. Change happens both voluntarily and involuntarily. We're great problem solvers. We access information meticulously. We won't just move any information. If it isn't information necessary for what we need it for, we'll disregard it. If we need it, we'll consider it and possibly use it.
Truest quote "INFJs have to filter everything through their brain first to see if it fits with who they are or beleive in before accepting it" ...we just cant accept information for its face value... It just has to be analysed to see if it aligns with our priniples and past experience... Great video real insightful as to the differences between INFJ and ENFJ
I think INFJs are fair minded. So I believe in always always taking people for their word. Face value is important. Everyone should talk with face value, think about what you say before you say it. Of course I can see what the person 'might' mean in between the lines, but acting on paranoia...some might call it Ni but its ultimately paranoia. Haha.
Spiritual Astrology Yeah... Im not saying INFJs can't take what someone says for face value... Its just that wether we do or not we subconsciously analyse first for the hidden reason or meaning behind why they say what they say... And check if it matches with what they said. This is got nothing to do with paranoia but the simple fact that our minds priorities Ni over Se so that we are always looking at whats not there. Infjs will always prioritise why someone may have said something over what they actually said.
How can you trust the universe. Things just seem to happen in this world. That's how I it seems to me anyway. Maybe an exception here and there but you would almost expect that from an in inanimate universe. Perhaps only the belief in God separates me form nihilism. That doesn't mean I would stop crying about morals. It would just mean that I would have no absolute moral authority on anything rendering them nothing more than a set of feelings. 🤔👽
I have never left a comment on TH-cam, so this is a first for me. However, I felt compelled to thank you for your kindness towards us INFJ's. You are both insightful and authentic. And, in as much as you admire our type, I feel the same way towards ENFJ's. I especially envy your social intelligence and social grace. You guys just seem to know how to integrate yourselves in a group, and you all do it so effortlessly and seamlessly. I often feel so ill at ease, even though I come off as being friendly and relaxed. I wish I could be more like ENFJ's in that regard. Anyway, thank you so much for this video. It is always wonderful to feel understood😊
Wow very well said lol you saved me from having to write alot of that although I know you put it alot better than I would've I tend to get way to caught up in details of every though for example I had started writing to her letting her know it's the 1st time I've ever watched one of her videos just this one told me she was sincere thoughtful honest encouraging ect point is I wrote more that just those things lol while u simply said she was authentic & something else I apologize its late I can't remember but it was perfect while I should really write a comment of my own for self preservation sake like she said as an INFJ our energy is low to begin w/ plus being perfectionist I almost always write for what could be hours only to say screw it i can't sum up my thoughts no matter how badly I want/need to so it's all a waste of time & energy which I'm already short of to begin with then I go on to beat myself up for wasting my precious resources yet again though she's worth it it wouldn't be a waste being that u pretty much sumed up what I was thinking & especially articulated it so nicely I'll opt out this time lmao well I suppose I could have written her in the time I took saying this to u lmao aahhhh I said I'm an INFJ not a perfect on (close though pretty close haha just kidding closer to the opposite spectrum lol)
I know! I envy their ability to fit in everywhere they go and they do it so naturally and effortlessly. My partner is an ENFJ and once he walks into a room, he lights it up with his humor, humility and inclusion. Very admirable trait.
I'm an INFJ and I really agree with the actions speak louder than words thing. I actually have a strong distrust for compliments. I always assume people are just pretending to be nice or say what they think is the right thing to say. What people do and how they treat you on a daily basis is way more telling and meaningful. I also think your right about us be unmoldable. I I think a good way to explain it is we are foam. You can squish us but we will slowly pop back to our original shape, maybe a bit bent but ultimately the same.
I also believe in action more than words... But I don't feel that they are pretending i feel that when they think logically they found tyou are important in their life whatever they say is true for their logical mind but in subconscious it's different... Like you wanted to wake up early or do exercise daily but you just don't do it... When you decide you want to do all this you are being true but it's just the motivation isn't enough or you are being lazy... They find INFJ's in their life important by logic but not in their subconscious mind.
I am also an INFJ. But I am not distrustful of compliments. My love language is Words of Affirmation. I focus more what is the context of the compliments and how the person is saying it. And also why they are saying it.
What few people know in regards to MBTI cognitive functions is that you do not only have the 4 stack. You actually have 4 sides of the mind with 4 functions to each. The "ego" which is your personality, the "shadow" which is the inverse of your ego, the "subconscious" which is who you want to be and your "superego" which is the piece of the divine within you. The reason I say this is because of your distrust for compliments and this comes from your shadow. The first function is extroverted intuition and this function behaves in a paranoid fashion which explains your deep distrust of other people's motives via compliment. There is so much more into it like your SI demon that causes you to discard your own personal needs/health. I recommend reading "energies and patterns of the psychological types" by John Beebe. This is the true depth psychology that can help you understand yourself at a MUCH deeper level. This is much more comprehensive and accurate than just MBTI as it only scratches the surface of your mind.
INFJ here, and I have recently realized that I'm "unmoldable." Other people suggest what to do or how to act, and Ni-Ti filter it and I end up saying "This doesn't align with me" or "I'll think about it." But when I say "I'll think about it," I usually think about it along with a lot of other options. And if I do what others say, it's only because I've simulated it through Ni and felt that it's the best option. It annoys my ENFJ sister because when I have a problem, she's like "do this and that" and I'd like "I don't need suggestions, I just need to bounce off ideas". And, yeah, most of the decisions I've made in life, I made myself. I found, at times, that in times of stress and looked for solutions or decisions from the outside (without filtering it through Ni), I found that I regret following the decision. So I've learned that although it takes a long time, I need clarity before I decide on something.
Same for me. I can't stand it when someone says "try this!". First, explain to me your reasoning for why you think that will work for me in this specific instance. How does it benefit me wholly? Second, I would prefer to have a meaningful discussion with you so you can really understand the issue. Then, let's bounce some ideas around. No one ever seems to want to engage in meaningful discussions, they just want to throw out ambivalent suggestions. For me, it hurts because it feels like they don't care enough to spend time talking about my issue or whatever it might be. We need more INFJ Meetups in the world...
Also an INFJ... I have told people those words so many times I have lost count. Funny how that simple concept is about as comforting a thought as there can be... Knowing there is something more, something bigger, a purpose to everything. It is essential.
LoniLovesLife yes, I'm 37 and can absolutely agree. I've become more "you do you booboo. Ima do me." I used to think I should help everyone. Now I just want to help myself.
I'm 50 and can add a big high 5! It is hard trying tirelessly to help so many people that you come across in your youth and finding that in the end... they can only be helped if they want to be. I spent a lot of fruitless energy in that endeavor. You live and you learn and I now find I just spend more time on helping myself and my family, where I can.
that's so true...I used to take on peoples problems...tried to make them see things from another perspective...see a way out...see their strenghts...strangers told me their life secrets and I would listen and absorb their emotions...never getting anything back...not that people don't want to help me...but they can't because they don't really know who I am and understand me...so now I hide from people...can't take on their emotions...causing me to not knowing what to do with my life...it was a great part of my life being the supporting one...but I can't do it anymore...I don't have the strenght...I do care but if my efforts don't lead to them changing their way of seeing things...why bother...
Wow this is refreshing, I rarely found a video describing INFJ's this correctly. I'm used to watching videos and being like "wrong... wrong.. again wrong.." But this is pretty much right.
I viewed 2 videos of you and I already love your way of describing INFJ, it is very accurate and well communicated. Your videos brings a lot of value, thank you !
'The world is a fucking game sometimes you just have to keep trusting yourself!!" I loved when you spoke these words as it rings so true even when it feels trying to do so.
The quality over quantity really is true. I'm an INFJ male and was dating an ENFJ female and she was so over Fe that I had to stop being so Fe myself and just dig deeper to see if she truly liked me for who I am and when I finally caught her in an honest moment I found my answer and realized I was wasting my time. Her last relationship was four years with a guy who she didn't even seem to love, what she does is uses her Fe to recieve love and that's enough for her to feel protected but I'm looking for something realer than that.
I am an INFJ and like your interpretation. Non-moldable sounds correct for my personality, meaning that I can learn but not be told how I have to portray myself because it is phoney and dishonest.
Yup INFJs have a very stable inner core - but will feel just as affected by criticism as anyone else. INFJs will sponge up everything but its all a 'filterative' process. What does affect INFJs' world view is something that makes logical sense and fits the bigger picture.
I’m moldable. “Half of you didn’t hear what I just said”, -I had to skip back a few seconds to hear what you said again. Yeah, point taken! The way to think of it is that INFJ’s are self moldable. They alone can mold themselves.
You described it perfectly! I am only talking about myself. I built a magnetic field around me, so the world cannot corrupt me. But I am totally aware of the bad things going on around me.
I felt like an alien growing up, or most of the time for that matter, and I alienate people as well who disrespected, betrayed me or does not deserve my time, instead of confrontation I just disappear.
Thank you Meghan for showering us INFJs with such incredible understanding and love, which we rarely receive. I turn to this video when the world feels like a hostile place.
Funny. It's been almost a running joke that I've been the same person. As a kid, teen, adult, middle age. I never change. Really pinpointed so much so well. Nicely done.
Cool vid... I think it's true what you say about how we (INFJs) can be stubborn with our conclusions once we arrive at them. I think the reason this happens is because we are so open-minded to the varying perspectives on a matter that it takes an incredible amount of time and thought before we will anchor in and commit to a specific conviction or way of seeing something, on those rare occasions that we do. I find for myself that I can be persuaded to change my mind, but I won't change my mind just because someone says so. They'll need to present an explanation as to why I should that is as comprehensive as the process and reasoning it took for me to arrive at my position. Best analogy would be if it cost me £300,000 to purchase a house (or proverbial conclusion), it's gonna take at least £300,000 for me to consider letting it go. If I didn't have this approach then my Ni would be meaningless - the endless stream of data and time and thought that has contributed to me arriving at my belief would be redundant. I'd essentially have no root and be swayed back and forth by every opinion that others shared. So yeah, INFJs are stubborn about their convictions once they arrive at them, but its essentially because we respect our Ni. We respect our minds. We, in a sense, respect ourselves. For better or worse. But yeah, I agree it can be annoying. But our stubbornness is not impenetrable. It's just expensive. A person has to pay a similar price to sway or shift it as we had to pay to construct it in the first place. We never believe what we believe easily. It's the way we make sense of the world.
Well said my friend! We'll never be done or satisfied with anything because essentially the world is in flux always and that leads to ; "Its on to plan b then c then d then e....." untill we say " screw it ! Im done. Ill kill someone if they dont like it.... " then " Im sorry i didnt mean that. " Its frustrating being an INFJ sometimes. Family still cant figure me out because of the fighting over and for a cause at the same time. We are looking at the same thing from different latitudes ,longitude and distance so our different perspectives on the same problem could confuse and lead to a conflict when in fact we really agree on the subject. By then , voices were raised , maybe an explative ran thru the room really fast with its but on fire and someones feelings are hurt .has this happened to anyone ?
Imo we are so meticulously hard on ourselves that when someone else assumes what's best for we see that thhey haven't worked or seem the energy we put coming to our conclusions.
I'm 62 years years old male, my characteristics have developed exponentially. Everything is intense and my character is carved in stone. A little cynical, a little jaded.
The moment you were talking hesitantly about being influenced by other's thoughts, you closed the loophole when you addressed socialization being a shared experience and not a part of our essence, I buried my face in my hands. You do know this type well. Keep sharing, you are doing so much good by sharing. Also, thank you with the encouragement to stick to my intuition. This is right now my biggest struggle at the moment.
More than I could have imagined. After continuing to look through a refined lens, I have begun detaching myself from more of these pervasive elements of environmental conditioning. My process of differentiation is now picking through "me" with a finer tooth comb than before, and I am better able to understand this intangible self as it is further separated from the environment. Again, thank you very much.
Agree. We are not likely moldable, although adaptive. Not likely to change our mind without logical reasons of new information to do so. And certainly not changing course when foreseeing many inevitable events that will eventually unfold and take place. I would say we're definatetly glued to our positions until there is no longer a need to be, which could turn out to be our whole duration of life. As a whole, we are all maturing and gleaning from eachother's strengths. I too certainly have gained wisdom with age and experience and from influence of others.
I see you had much fun with narcissists as well. For them we are like fish bite on fishermans pole, like sheeps for the wolfes when the shepherd is on holiday. But thank God we have a major advantage over them: We can learn from lessons, they can only judge them.
True with that bold claim...A part of me believes that nothing really matters and at the same time still try to find meaning in everything so like living life has always a depressive connotation...
Interesting description. As an INFP there's an INFJ in my life I trust and admire deeply. She's honest, quiet, authentic, reliable. We don't talk that often being both introverts, but when we do I know I can trust everything she says. I can see your point when you say that, even if it may not seem that way on the surface, an INFJ will tend to do what they really want can deeply influence the lives of other people around them in a quiet, subtle but effective way because they really mean what they say or do.
INFJ here. So, I have this thing about the universe and how if everything happens for a reason then everything we do is predetermined, which means my life is already laid out before me and I have no choice but to float along with it. I really dislike this train of thought because it means I'm just a vessel for an inevitable outcome, which means the actions I do are essentially meaningless. I prefer to think in a way of 'everything always works out in the end.' I hold great faith in the tides of the universe and I know that despite the many storms we encounter in this journey, there will always be a calm, clear day proceeding those rough ones.
Really refreshing insights from a person who herself in not an INFJ but has in-depth understanding of our type. ..makes me feel understood without explaining myself...which I never do!
we care about what people think but at the same time we value too much our own ideas that we don't tend to conform to peoples standards. it is difficult to mould us because we are always skeptical about everything people say and do
Thank you for the "faith in the universe and everything happening for a reason" thing. Totally articulated something i couldn't find the words to explain. (if that makes any sense?) the whole video is basically on point, even with the parts you struggle to get your point through. i think INFJ's will totally understand what you meant. Especially because of the way you struggled to explain. i totally saw that you understood in the way you struggled to find a way to explain some of your points. i am impressed by your level of understanding. thank you for this video, really insightful.
As far as we INFJs struggle LESS with setting boundaries, yes, you are correct. I never realized boundaries were a problem for ENFJ. Thank you for sharing and for educating me. ABSOLUTELY...actions speak much louder than words. Blessings
Thank you SO much for acknowledging that we are not weak. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been called weak because of my kindness and wanting to help others. It takes strength to be kind and true to yourself in a cruel world. People try to mold me and it bothers me and confused me and it’s led my life to disequilibrium. But in a way I think you’re right in that I was always me or want to be me despite what people say and I still struggle with this and trusting who I am. In a way, I feel like you are describing an assertive type of INFJ ind this video. I am more on the turbulent spectrum of INFJ and I resonate with a lot of the feelings described as an ENFJ. Such as knowing when not to argue/share - I overshare and talk way too much and lots of times I get hurt by being vulnerable. You’re also right that INFJ’s look at people’s actions. I can’t tell you how many supportive words I can get from a friend but if they don’t back it up by physically being there for me or checking up on me and show they care, then it’s not as meaningful. Words are cheap sometimes. You’re also right about us thinking that everything happens for a reason. That’s literally my mantra lol. On days where I can’t see the light or don’t understand why I’m going through so much hardship instead of trusting the universe, I get even more depressed. I actually really like ENFJ’s and I wished I was one! Like you said, being an introvert and wanting to help so much is so draining and the energy supply is low lol.
I was there once, but it will just come to you. There's a certain tug deep down inside & that's why you don't entirely succumb to your depression. You're a silent warrior, but a warrior nonetheless...❤
How sweet are you to have such nice things to say about infj's. What a kind girl, with such a wealth of understanding and insight. God bless you for seeing the beauty in others the way you do. Thank you. You restored my faith in humanity today.
The funny thing is people who aren't close to us think we are super mouldable and don't have a strong opinion about things, but people who are closed to us knows 💜
I found this whole “unmoldable” thing incredibly fascinating, especially when you brought up the door slam and bending around and giving my time and energy to others who don’t give back enough... it has made me come to the conclusion that I do not get along well with ENFPs in the context of close friendships. 😕 they’re such cool people and I’d love to be close with them, but I always feel incredibly insignificant and even unimportant in their lives, and then they question why I’m distanced from them, or why I even leave them
Omg. You can't possibly know just how much I needed that. In true INFJ fashion, I think I came across this video at the right time. The whole knowing who we are thing. I was about 13 (lol) when i knew who i was. And people around me would always say that you don't know who you are until you're older. And I always felt squashed by that. But I never stopped thinking that I knew exactly who I was.. am. I am still discovering things about myself, but my core person is the same. Thank you for this video. This is exactly the kind of thing we want. To know that the energy we put out actually helps someone and they actually use it to improve themselves and their own lives. THANK YOU!!
Glad i stumbled on this video. This is very insightful, being one of the rarest personality is really exhausting when no one seems to understand you. You had me when you said that we believe that everything has a reason. You nailed it girl. It is our life's mission to figure out why we exist and what we can contribute to society. We hate inauthenticity and we loathe people doing selfish things.
I am now 46 years old. My mother was 18 when I was born in 1973. I was the weird kid growing up. I just discovered this personality and now I KNOW that I am not crazy. I am so overwhelmed with emotions and I need to slow down and not take too much in to fast. Thank you everyone for your contributions and helping me figure out how I work. Thank you
Thank you for this, Meghan! INFJ's are great at focusing on our faults and how 'alien' we feel. Re: being molded, I think on a surface level we are moldable, we adapt to the environments we are in, which becomes exhausting. Like you touched on, doing this for too long is draining which is why we dream of finding someone who we don't have to 'mold ourselves' to for the sake of harmony. But deep down we hold steady who we truly are and what is valuable to us. And people do affect us deeply, but in an indirect way. I may take that outside information and filter it through my Ni & Ti and modify my values if I feel like I learned something new about myself or society or humanity. I'm basically agreeing with you!
I just wanted to say that I find the way you speak beautiful, and I feel like you're somewhat talking to your gf/thinking about what you would want to say to her while sharing your insights with your audience, which makes it even more beautiful
Yea I definitely went through that acceptance of the universe phase, and Ive learned so much about myself. "You influence the world, the world does not influence you" I love you
Your points and insight are spot on. Great video! We are deep, open, yet immovable. Usually friends who have always criticized me for what I wear, who I date, my decisions I took it as a grain of salt. I’d reflect and think deeply about it as a check and balance but I don’t assimilate. Eventually those people fall out of my life and then I feel a weight lifts. Often, I hear they mentioned being jealous of me for my confidence, the people I attract, or my stand alone nature. I’ve even gotten frenemies tell me they were sorry for what they did or said. I always appreciate their honesty but again, doesn’t really influence me to think or act differently. My response is usually... okay, thanks for proving my intuitive feeling of you right. We attract the crappiest people sometimes. INFJs only second guess ourselves when the truth is staring at us and we see it but want to avoid it 😆 Second guessing is a tactic to stall or delay.
I definitely am difficult to mold... I feel like there have been people that molded me in my adolescence, but as I mature and build a better idea of who I am and where I want to go, it's hard for me to let people sway my ways. We're so damn stubborn about what we believe and our values truly come first. It's almost impossible for someone to change that. That's not to say we're like a rock with all things. We are very open-minded people and receive outside information on an equal ground. We're just choosy about what information we allow to affect us. (due to tertiary Ti)
Wow, this has got to be the best and most insightful video on INFJs (from another type's perspective) yet! It's so true that we can't really be molded by others. Since forever people have tried to tell me what to do and I've always(even as a teen) just smiled and nodded and went on to do whatever I wanted to do anyway. All the points you mentioned are most definitely true for me. It takes a special kind of emotional intelligence to be able to observe these things:) Thank you and I love you ENFJs too:) You are precious and please never doubt your worth
Well done Meghan. You have great insight! I'm an INFJ and you resonate very much with me. Love your comment "wait for clarity". I have a pretty good intuition about people but if I know that I will be around them for a while - like workmates I like to "wait for clarity" before I decide to invest in them in any way. Most of the time my initial intuition is correct. Thanks for taking the time for this video series. Love people who make the effort to understand people. The world would be a better place if we all took the time to have empathy and compassion for our fellow humans.
"Everything happens for a reason" very good insight, the first of INFJ discussions where I've seen this observation. Yes, the universe is indeed evolving toward the Greater Good, therefore everything....
Meghan you are fantastic .... People will try to negatively impact for their own benefit while it hurts you.... Never let it happen... At the end of all things it is you that has to live with the impacts of your choice making not others. I am 45 and I'm an infj, since being hurt physically and emotionally by others because I don't follow other people belief system of others/society I have a lived outcasted by most people that have met me. It created a small bit of doubt within me, but I don't regret my way. I know who I am and what moral grounds I choose to stand on. Influence is powerful, I use love and respect as a guide while some toxic people use negative means to use people. So my message to you is this: no one will love and respect you more than your self and at some point a worthy person will cherish you fully to their capacity... You are great just be you the world needs more real people who are smart and respect human life. Life is meant to be shared positively with others while the toxic can share their toxic with like minded individuals not with the positive like minded people. I can sense you seemed to be hurting slightly... Don't give that energy... Your focus is needed for your self elsewhere. Loves for you!!!! Never surrender to other people's poor behavior, they are not you.🙂
Wow incredibly understanding great work! I don’t believe everything happens for a reason. I use that Ni (I’m cursed at 96%) to start making things happen for a reason in striving for greatness for present and future generations! 😊 At 11:47, I think that, personally, I don’t get moved or influenced in that way because often I see things from a universal perspective. If someone says something offensive to me, why would I limit my happiness that day just over an opinion. There’s just so so much more to life!!! I know who I am, that person doesn’t. There’s so much more to life then wasting energy on offence and limiting your happiness!!! There’s just too much beauty and meaning in life then to waste it all away on anxiety about what they said, resentment from what they said and bitterness from not letting go of what they said - all of which is limiting your ability to enjoy the overwhelming sense of beauty in which we’re all in! You are an amazing woman, you got this!!
Very on target I’m infj and could relate well to all of your observations. I find I have to protect my energy. I am also have not wanted to mold in any way to what someone else thinks I should be. I’m very comfortable with who I am and what I believe. I’m older, 56 so some of this could be age related. I did also know who I was at a very young age. I feel the energy of the world around me and act according to what it’s telling me. Everything is grey in my world not black and white. Thanks for this you are clearly paying close attention. 😊
one of my best friends is an infj, she's incredible! had a difficult time understanding her for a while but after researching the type i was able to truly comprehend her actions and thinking process a lot better. my friend group comprises of two infps (including me), an intp, an intj, and that beautiful infj friend. i get the feeling that we're all soulmates. anyways, rock on infjs!
Wooow this makes me feel so much better. Sometimes I feel like I go with the flow and perhaps I mold too easily because of people...but maybe looking from another angle and looking at how many things have stayed the same ... I'm not that moldable. 🤔
I feel like you were spot on when you said we are unmoldable. We don’t care about social pressures because we know what we believe in and we strengthen our views in any way we know how. I think you have great insight and I am so happy that you are someone who understands us! Keep up the fantastic work and stay positive!
Hey, great video. I am an INFJ, and I totally agree with your point on feeling depressed when my belief that everything happens for a reason is weakening.
INFJ here; when I was in the army I was seen as a rebel 'cause I always asked WHY and got into trouble for that. Just a note; don't admire our solid understanding of what we want to do in life too much because we also over analyse everything and that can cause procrastination.
I know a person within the first 5 minutes of speaking with them. My feelings are very accurate, but not perfect. But if I am going to gamble, I will always go with my gut. I don't care what people think of me because I love me for my blessing and curse of being infj.
One of the weirdest things I've noticed since discovering the mbti community and getting to know my personality type as infj is how much infj's are alike, I can spend so much time reading infj comments because it feels like I wrote them, also every once in a while I stumble on a comment of someone who is supposedly infj and know right away they aren't, it's weird, very weird. I wonder if anyone else feels like this too, I would love to be surrounded by infj's that also know they are infj's, that would be bliss, everything would be so easier and things would just work.
Thank you for this video. It's cool to see an outside perspective on the INFJ personality type. I'm an INFJ woman. Most of what you said rang true with me. I did at one point space out and had to go back and rewatch what you said. I'm borderline hermit INFJ, and literally have to hype myself to be around people. I'm very secure with myself, and I haven't changed myself for anyone. Even when those have tried to hurt me. The INFJ door slam is REAL. Believe me. Thank you for the video. I know this was posted months ago. Great observations!!!
Me unmoldable? That was probably that part that resonated with me the most. I've been told I make a Missouri mule look trainable, and I agree with that. While I have had influences over the years, I think I tend to be a "take me as I am" type of person. I also return that favor though. Come as you are, and welcome to a judgment free zone. I knew at 10 I wanted to be an aircraft mechanic, and everything I did in school was to that end. Right after high school, I went to a community college for that. I work on computers now, but am working towards combining those two careers. I've always had people ask me why I'm so hard on myself, and put myself under so much pressure. Until I started looking into personality types, I had no idea why I did those things. I just did it. I also absolutely believe in quality over quantity in relationships. I'd rather have a few close friends that I know will be there, rather than surround myself with a bunch of flakes that only want the high points. As for making the world a better place...I hope to. Otherwise was my life worth living? And now that I've spent entirely too much time talking about myself..... Also, joined your Facebook book page, and have enjoyed my time spent there. I think I need to start taking notes so I can remember everything that comes to mind while watching the video.
Thank you so much for understanding!! I love you with all of my heart!!! I feel like I have never been more understood in my life I was getting so emotional because of it!! Thank you so much for understanding, I love you❤️
You literally just made me feel so understood... by someone as a stranger to me personally, more than anyone else in my personal life right now that is a friend or relative. More importantly, you gave me some reasons to focus on my strengths and weaknesses as an INFJ and also to not feel so ashamed or depressed when others don't understand my exact thought process. Like, SERIOUSLY, are you around Houston, TX, because I already want to become best friends with you and help each other grow together haha! Thank you so much for your insight and incredible perspective on being able to understand someone that thinks like me. You give me hope.
Thank you Meghan. Stubborn indeed! I get what you mean. We can put ourselves in someone else's shoe but still, not our shoes. And yes, you don't need to fight, be at peace knowing who you are and that you accept every bit of it. Just be you, there's nothing wrong with you.
The trio combination of books, on your shelf is awesome. Social, sandwiched by trust, and what I assume, is a book on connection. Your bookshelf is a beautiful expression of you. Its like the holy trinity of humanity. I trust you already. Its nice to have to have genuine outside perspective. Its harder to get that, In my immediate life. I can also tell, that you are learning as you teach. Which is inviting, and I admire you for that. It makes me feel involved, rather than staring at a screen. You have a talent, You have a Voice. Thank you, for being you. Also, thank you for your closing advice. I have HUGE dreams, and even at 25, I feel like I have failed my lifetime goal already. But I've for some reason, been waiting for someone trustworthy, to... I guess... Confirm my permission, to put my blinders on, and just do it. I've always been afraid of what people will think, But I don't want to care anymore.. At least this deeply. Its exhausting, and I get more depressed, as my life passes, and I give it away to others. They never seem to know, what kind of impact it has. But its having less impact already.
Time is our most valuable currency. Our next breath is never promised to us, time cannot be borrowed on credit, and I hate to waste my time or somebody else's on fruitless endeavors. There is always a way for everyone to walk away satisfied from a situation with minimal compromise. (I'm INFJ)
Wow!, you are one very observant young lady, I have not come across a non INFJ that has such an understanding of what an INFJ is and how we operate, I couldn't fault anything you have said. This is one of the best Personality Type videos I have seen, well done.
I thoroughly enjoyed your experience with INFJ's and what you've learned from them. I kept nodding along with pretty much everything you said. Thank you for sharing your experience. I'm really touched as an INFJ. It's true: I'm not mold-able in the end. I realize much of the world may not understand or approve of me and that's okay now that I'm older and discovered my true value, which comes from within and having a healthy, loving relationship with myself as a human being. It is through becoming more authentically me and sharing the true me with others that I've become blessed with sincere, encouraging friends. Life is tough, yes, yet it's a wondrous journey, so again thank you for this video and I wish you greater, richer self- and life-discovery, Meghan!
Only recently have I actually become so intrigued with personality types because I watched this video that popped up in my feed and it was on INFJs. Ya know, one of those interesting factoid channels that always has something like "woah" to talk about and so anyways~~~ the video was titled like "Why the INFJ is the most rare of the personality types" so I was like WOAH I'm going to check this out. And I did. And I was blown away by the fact that it was like explaining me and all the innermost parts of my being. I've never actually taken a personality test before, so I went ahead onto 16personalities or whatever it's called and I ended up, sure enough, getting INFJ as my end result. Now I'm so blown away by the fact that for once I'm actually being understood. I'm watching all these different youtubers talking about INFJs, even if they are or aren't one themselves. The point of what I'm saying is, hearing you talk about how like the INFJ doesn't let what other people think or say influence who they are and they are not easily molded, I just keep thinking in my head, it feels so good to be understood. Because you're right, I really have never been influenced by people, so I watch others around me changing for others and trying to impress me even sometimes in some way like saying they like something I'm into just because they know I am and I'm just like NO what are you doing, I hope you're not trying to be someone you're not here. Anywho, I always feel so different at school and just when I interact with anyone really that are my peers. I feel set apart and usually I just think, because I am a Christian and I have a Christian mindset, that it's because of my religion. But ever since I actually started learning more about personality types, I'm realizing why I feel so different and set apart all the time. And of course it is partly because of what I believe as a Christian but still! I've been going on a tangent but I just wanted to share my little story. I'm 16 and about to be 17 going into my senior year of high school btw. I feel like I should share that information? I don't know why? I appreciate your thoughtful videos!! Goodness I'm a mess lol bye now
Watching this video has made me realize so many things about myself. I am technically an ambivert (leaning more towards the introverted side), so I am a mix of INFJ and ENFJ traits.
I think the whole 'take it for what it is' from people who constantly tell me not to overanalyze other people's behavior and what they tell me verbally. I saw this on FB - Beneath every behavior there is a feeling, and beneath each feeling is a need. And when we meet that need rather than focus on the behavior, we begin to deal with the cause, not the symptom. I have had toxic family and friends emotionally project on me. When I got to the root of the issues, I found a better understanding of how people who are not INFJ work. That determined whether stuck around or I doorslammed them.
I appreciate your kind words. The LGBT example hit home - I think this contributed a lot to my inability to move from my stance even when it meant taking the pain of being seen a certain way (or abandoned) by people I cared about. When I am wrong about my intuition on a person, it is soul-crushing. My constant trying to hang in there and be there for people when they can't feel my loyalty and commitment to their happiness, that hurts. And words never do the deep feelings we have justice. No one ever believes how much we care. At the same time, I feel too vulnerable conveying them, so oftentimes I don't. My ENFJs are lifesavers, don't underestimate your own power. Literally one saved my life when I was extremely down.
I know who I am and what I think about life, while that amazes most people, it’s a kind of quiet resilience that drives my ENFJ husband in particular crazy. He wants to influence me and dominate me, align my thinking with his. He was unsure about his opinions before but throughout the years he self validated his own thoughts and now we’re at a stand still. He said of me I’m like a wild horse that needs to be tamed, and he’s up for the task. Both ENFJ and INFJ can be quite immovable.
i see a lot of things your saying back in myself and you're right about a lot of thing. a few sums up: 1 you said we spent our energy better. Basically we're most likely not to even give much energy. That why we're introvert and you are extrovert. Also we do doorslam indeed. When you don't seem to fit in out lives and or you hurt us we probably close the door for you and won't even tell you. This has a lot to do with staying close to who we are and protecting ourself. Also you said we don't really care about what others say. Basically we do really really much care. BUT our own standards and own critical mind is higher than anyone else and that's why we won't change so much. I really loved your video. You got a great eye on who we are and we really respect and appreciate that we're understood.
Ty for yur Share.. Every perspective matters.. It helps us to learn and accept and to filter through our everyday Changes! Bless u Young one. #INFJ from GUAM
If there is one thing I've observed about enfjs as an infj it is the enfjs are super sharp, in any matter they put their minds to. Also, I'm always impressed by how accurate your videos on infjs are. How? Not even fuction based but scenario based. Incredible.
You're video is very generous and it's probably much more than we deserve. You're generous like the sun. That light is very much welcomed and means more to people than you realize so keep up the good work.
Completely agree with most everything you said in regards to us. Also wanted to put out that we do often envy extroverts for y'all's long social battery. Thanks for explaining all this because we often can't because it's hard to explain ourselves and often understand ourselves
This is my favourite video ever! Though I'm straight and got nothing from that homosexual comment you made--in all other comments you made, Meghan, in this video, thank you so very much! This video made my day! Though I have never met you, I love you and the beautiful kindness you offer to me and others in our lives! You make a very big difference in my life---even though you didn't know it. I am a huge fan! Thank you! :-)
Thank you for this video! As an INFJ healing mental health issues, a few of which stem from a whole bundle of feeling I was "wrong" the way I naturally operate, it's a joy to have these traits celebrated. You mention not having trust in the universe - and leaving a comment if so - and that is something I struggle with. Ironically, your video helps a little with that, but by and large I just can't get into a trust headspace and out of a the-universe-totally-doesn't-care one. Thank you again for making this video and sharing your perspectives.
It was such a high complement for you to call out INFJs inner strength, even pushing us to realize it when we doubt it and think people have hurt and changed us. That we still stay strong. We tend to be too self critical and only focus on how we weren't perfect and where we failed and struggled, where others have hurt us, which makes us feel an even stronger need to build up more inner strength, clarify our values and analyze what people have said, but it's mean and self-critical-as you said. At least this is how it is for me. Only certain people see how self critical INFJs are, with other types, and I think ENFJs are great at seeing this. I think we share a unique understanding and feel a lot of the same pain. Your advice was SO spot on at the end. Thank you so much!!
For us INFJs, talk is cheap...
The INFJ I knew actually enjoyed conversation with people, but mostly in effort to understand people. He couldn’t comprehend the point of the youtube comment section though. It was kind of sweet.
If you dont walk your talk... As an INFJ I question whether or not you have a soul or if you arent an evil demonic robot. Haha. I cannot comprehend not meaning what you say and saying what you mean.... -_-
As an INFJ, I am a SHOW ME person, not a tell me. Telling me is an extra wasted step, whereas if they just show me, I can make an immediate assessment of the person. Tell me until you are blue in the face, but it is all just smoke and mirrors.
ey na perfectly said
Yes! I just said to a friend two days ago show me don’t tell me. We need to independently decide for ourselves devoid of anyone else’s opinions, influences, or emotions. However we will listen to people one on one and try and help them until we turn blue.
Another reason we INFJs might "slam the door" is that we don't have much energy to deal with people. So we tend to cut our losses fairly quickly.
@J No...We INFJs only "slam the door" when we have been abused or taken advantage of...Will we let you back in?...Yes but we will never trust or look at you the same way again.
INFJ don't want to wear the t-👕 I'm with stupid. We don't suffer fools gladly. We are rebellious mostly in an intelligent way. We see the backslash will come but we will do it anyway may be spontaneous, go slow way a walk away or some way. We will do the the golden rebellion or the Phoenix rebellion. Golden rebellion very social, Phoenix rebellion kind of a burning light where everyone will remember your name as the fools pick up the pieces.. Like Lina Inverse says in her battle cry while her enemies are running for their lives, "Let the fools before me be destroyed "😜😁😝!
@@xoxxobob61 yeah i agree with u but me personally Its really hard to read me.. i slam the door on someone without them knowing... if they interact with me ill treat them kindly but there wont be any real connection... I won’t go to them to talk but I won’t ignore them either... when I don’t like someone I won’t show it even though i can easily see if someone doesn’t like me...the reason for door slamming is usually we can sense fakeness if u know what i mean...
You are absolutely right about INFJ's not being changed by any one's opinion. We are simultaneously chameleons, excessively sensitive and unchangeable. The chameleon and aspect is only on the surface and the sensitivity is emotional, but our core identity is unshakeable and we will walk through the world completely alone if that's what we have to do to maintain our identity.
I fucking love this comment!
Wow! beautiful! Infp here! Peace and Love!
Well said!🤝Feel the same way, even though I am ENFJ 🥰🤝
It's not about be unchangeable. Change happens both voluntarily and involuntarily. We're great problem solvers. We access information meticulously. We won't just move any information. If it isn't information necessary for what we need it for, we'll disregard it. If we need it, we'll consider it and possibly use it.
Truest quote "INFJs have to filter everything through their brain first to see if it fits with who they are or beleive in before accepting it" ...we just cant accept information for its face value... It just has to be analysed to see if it aligns with our priniples and past experience... Great video real insightful as to the differences between INFJ and ENFJ
I think INFJs are fair minded. So I believe in always always taking people for their word. Face value is important. Everyone should talk with face value, think about what you say before you say it. Of course I can see what the person 'might' mean in between the lines, but acting on paranoia...some might call it Ni but its ultimately paranoia. Haha.
Spiritual Astrology Yeah... Im not saying INFJs can't take what someone says for face value... Its just that wether we do or not we subconsciously analyse first for the hidden reason or meaning behind why they say what they say... And check if it matches with what they said. This is got nothing to do with paranoia but the simple fact that our minds priorities Ni over Se so that we are always looking at whats not there. Infjs will always prioritise why someone may have said something over what they actually said.
Distracted minded
I can relate to you I'm a infij 100%
Distracted Mind 🧠
You were spot on about how infjs can get depressed when we doubt the universe! Ive been throuh that for sure, but trust always resurfaces eventually
That is so true Carolyn! :)
How can you trust the universe. Things just seem to happen in this world. That's how I it seems to me anyway. Maybe an exception here and there but you would almost expect that from an in inanimate universe. Perhaps only the belief in God separates me form nihilism. That doesn't mean I would stop crying about morals. It would just mean that I would have no absolute moral authority on anything rendering them nothing more than a set of feelings. 🤔👽
No religion. Just trust the universe.
Bruno Justo Whithout a religion what reason is there to terust the universe?
Bruno Justo Even no religion is a form of religion.
I have never left a comment on TH-cam, so this is a first for me. However, I felt compelled to thank you for your kindness towards us INFJ's. You are both insightful and authentic. And, in as much as you admire our type, I feel the same way towards ENFJ's. I especially envy your social intelligence and social grace. You guys just seem to know how to integrate yourselves in a group, and you all do it so effortlessly and seamlessly. I often feel so ill at ease, even though I come off as being friendly and relaxed. I wish I could be more like ENFJ's in that regard. Anyway, thank you so much for this video. It is always wonderful to feel understood😊
Allow me to be your first reply!
@@HalendleofLoc Holy F***
I 968264746671544838% Agree
Also
What A good 1st comment
A++
Wow very well said lol you saved me from having to write alot of that although I know you put it alot better than I would've I tend to get way to caught up in details of every though for example I had started writing to her letting her know it's the 1st time I've ever watched one of her videos just this one told me she was sincere thoughtful honest encouraging ect point is I wrote more that just those things lol while u simply said she was authentic & something else I apologize its late I can't remember but it was perfect while I should really write a comment of my own for self preservation sake like she said as an INFJ our energy is low to begin w/ plus being perfectionist I almost always write for what could be hours only to say screw it i can't sum up my thoughts no matter how badly I want/need to so it's all a waste of time & energy which I'm already short of to begin with then I go on to beat myself up for wasting my precious resources yet again though she's worth it it wouldn't be a waste being that u pretty much sumed up what I was thinking & especially articulated it so nicely I'll opt out this time lmao well I suppose I could have written her in the time I took saying this to u lmao aahhhh I said I'm an INFJ not a perfect on (close though pretty close haha just kidding closer to the opposite spectrum lol)
Thanks for the video. This is truly helpful
I know! I envy their ability to fit in everywhere they go and they do it so naturally and effortlessly. My partner is an ENFJ and once he walks into a room, he lights it up with his humor, humility and inclusion. Very admirable trait.
I'm an INFJ and I really agree with the actions speak louder than words thing. I actually have a strong distrust for compliments. I always assume people are just pretending to be nice or say what they think is the right thing to say. What people do and how they treat you on a daily basis is way more telling and meaningful. I also think your right about us be unmoldable. I I think a good way to explain it is we are foam. You can squish us but we will slowly pop back to our original shape, maybe a bit bent but ultimately the same.
I also believe in action more than words... But I don't feel that they are pretending i feel that when they think logically they found tyou are important in their life whatever they say is true for their logical mind but in subconscious it's different... Like you wanted to wake up early or do exercise daily but you just don't do it... When you decide you want to do all this you are being true but it's just the motivation isn't enough or you are being lazy... They find INFJ's in their life important by logic but not in their subconscious mind.
I am also an INFJ. But I am not distrustful of compliments. My love language is Words of Affirmation. I focus more what is the context of the compliments and how the person is saying it. And also why they are saying it.
What few people know in regards to MBTI cognitive functions is that you do not only have the 4 stack. You actually have 4 sides of the mind with 4 functions to each. The "ego" which is your personality, the "shadow" which is the inverse of your ego, the "subconscious" which is who you want to be and your "superego" which is the piece of the divine within you. The reason I say this is because of your distrust for compliments and this comes from your shadow. The first function is extroverted intuition and this function behaves in a paranoid fashion which explains your deep distrust of other people's motives via compliment. There is so much more into it like your SI demon that causes you to discard your own personal needs/health. I recommend reading "energies and patterns of the psychological types" by John Beebe. This is the true depth psychology that can help you understand yourself at a MUCH deeper level. This is much more comprehensive and accurate than just MBTI as it only scratches the surface of your mind.
INFJ here, and I have recently realized that I'm "unmoldable." Other people suggest what to do or how to act, and Ni-Ti filter it and I end up saying "This doesn't align with me" or "I'll think about it." But when I say "I'll think about it," I usually think about it along with a lot of other options. And if I do what others say, it's only because I've simulated it through Ni and felt that it's the best option. It annoys my ENFJ sister because when I have a problem, she's like "do this and that" and I'd like "I don't need suggestions, I just need to bounce off ideas".
And, yeah, most of the decisions I've made in life, I made myself. I found, at times, that in times of stress and looked for solutions or decisions from the outside (without filtering it through Ni), I found that I regret following the decision. So I've learned that although it takes a long time, I need clarity before I decide on something.
Same for me. I can't stand it when someone says "try this!". First, explain to me your reasoning for why you think that will work for me in this specific instance. How does it benefit me wholly? Second, I would prefer to have a meaningful discussion with you so you can really understand the issue. Then, let's bounce some ideas around. No one ever seems to want to engage in meaningful discussions, they just want to throw out ambivalent suggestions. For me, it hurts because it feels like they don't care enough to spend time talking about my issue or whatever it might be. We need more INFJ Meetups in the world...
Thank you, Meghan. These are some compliments us INFJs need to hear more often. This video has boosted my morale.
Winand Callebaut for real... 😄👍🏽
Same 🤗
”everything happens for a reason”, it's practically my motto LOL (INFJ male).
Also an INFJ... I have told people those words so many times I have lost count. Funny how that simple concept is about as comforting a thought as there can be... Knowing there is something more, something bigger, a purpose to everything. It is essential.
Everything!
You are so spot on abt INFJs. We care but as we get older, we care alot less. Thanks for your great video!!
LoniLovesLife yes, I'm 37 and can absolutely agree. I've become more "you do you booboo. Ima do me." I used to think I should help everyone. Now I just want to help myself.
Amen!
I'm 50 and can add a big high 5! It is hard trying tirelessly to help so many people that you come across in your youth and finding that in the end... they can only be helped if they want to be. I spent a lot of fruitless energy in that endeavor. You live and you learn and I now find I just spend more time on helping myself and my family, where I can.
that's so true...I used to take on peoples problems...tried to make them see things from another perspective...see a way out...see their strenghts...strangers told me their life secrets and I would listen and absorb their emotions...never getting anything back...not that people don't want to help me...but they can't because they don't really know who I am and understand me...so now I hide from people...can't take on their emotions...causing me to not knowing what to do with my life...it was a great part of my life being the supporting one...but I can't do it anymore...I don't have the strenght...I do care but if my efforts don't lead to them changing their way of seeing things...why bother...
I guess I hit that older mark... cause I don't care about half the stuff that used to worry me. #growth
Wow this is refreshing, I rarely found a video describing INFJ's this correctly.
I'm used to watching videos and being like "wrong... wrong.. again wrong.." But this is pretty much right.
What you said around INFJs losing faith in the universe....that is me right now!
It's like.. "It's just your life, and everyone else is just living in it." .... 100/100 for that one. Nailed it.
I viewed 2 videos of you and I already love your way of describing INFJ, it is very accurate and well communicated. Your videos brings a lot of value, thank you !
'The world is a fucking game sometimes you just have to keep trusting yourself!!" I loved when you spoke these words as it rings so true even when it feels trying to do so.
The quality over quantity really is true. I'm an INFJ male and was dating an ENFJ female and she was so over Fe that I had to stop being so Fe myself and just dig deeper to see if she truly liked me for who I am and when I finally caught her in an honest moment I found my answer and realized I was wasting my time. Her last relationship was four years with a guy who she didn't even seem to love, what she does is uses her Fe to recieve love and that's enough for her to feel protected but I'm looking for something realer than that.
So it wasn't mutual, do you mean THAT?
Power of Ni!
May I ask how you caught her in an honest moment?
I am an INFJ and like your interpretation. Non-moldable sounds correct for my personality, meaning that I can learn but not be told how I have to portray myself because it is phoney and dishonest.
Thank you for saying the positive things about INFJ's. Sometimes it seems that we only hear the negative.
As an INFJ, i am thankful for that video, it's painful to be that type, i agree with most of what you've said!)))
Yup INFJs have a very stable inner core - but will feel just as affected by criticism as anyone else. INFJs will sponge up everything but its all a 'filterative' process. What does affect INFJs' world view is something that makes logical sense and fits the bigger picture.
I’m moldable.
“Half of you didn’t hear what I just said”, -I had to skip back a few seconds to hear what you said again.
Yeah, point taken!
The way to think of it is that INFJ’s are self moldable. They alone can mold themselves.
You described it perfectly! I am only talking about myself.
I built a magnetic field around me, so the world cannot corrupt me. But I am totally aware of the bad things going on around me.
I felt like an alien growing up, or most of the time for that matter, and I alienate people as well who disrespected, betrayed me or does not deserve my time, instead of confrontation I just disappear.
Thank you Meghan for showering us INFJs with such incredible understanding and love, which we rarely receive. I turn to this video when the world feels like a hostile place.
Funny. It's been almost a running joke that I've been the same person. As a kid, teen, adult, middle age. I never change. Really pinpointed so much so well. Nicely done.
Cool vid... I think it's true what you say about how we (INFJs) can be stubborn with our conclusions once we arrive at them. I think the reason this happens is because we are so open-minded to the varying perspectives on a matter that it takes an incredible amount of time and thought before we will anchor in and commit to a specific conviction or way of seeing something, on those rare occasions that we do. I find for myself that I can be persuaded to change my mind, but I won't change my mind just because someone says so. They'll need to present an explanation as to why I should that is as comprehensive as the process and reasoning it took for me to arrive at my position.
Best analogy would be if it cost me £300,000 to purchase a house (or proverbial conclusion), it's gonna take at least £300,000 for me to consider letting it go. If I didn't have this approach then my Ni would be meaningless - the endless stream of data and time and thought that has contributed to me arriving at my belief would be redundant. I'd essentially have no root and be swayed back and forth by every opinion that others shared. So yeah, INFJs are stubborn about their convictions once they arrive at them, but its essentially because we respect our Ni. We respect our minds. We, in a sense, respect ourselves. For better or worse. But yeah, I agree it can be annoying. But our stubbornness is not impenetrable. It's just expensive. A person has to pay a similar price to sway or shift it as we had to pay to construct it in the first place. We never believe what we believe easily. It's the way we make sense of the world.
Well said my friend! We'll never be done or satisfied with anything because essentially the world is in flux always and that leads to ; "Its on to plan b then c then d then e....." untill we say " screw it ! Im done. Ill kill someone if they dont like it.... " then " Im sorry i didnt mean that. "
Its frustrating being an INFJ sometimes. Family still cant figure me out because of the fighting over and for a cause at the same time. We are looking at the same thing from different latitudes ,longitude and distance so our different perspectives on the same problem could confuse and lead to a conflict when in fact we really agree on the subject. By then , voices were raised , maybe an explative ran thru the room really fast with its but on fire and someones feelings are hurt .has this happened to anyone ?
Imo we are so meticulously hard on ourselves that when someone else assumes what's best for we see that thhey haven't worked or seem the energy we put coming to our conclusions.
I'm 62 years years old male, my characteristics have developed exponentially. Everything is intense and my character is carved in stone. A little cynical, a little jaded.
The moment you were talking hesitantly about being influenced by other's thoughts, you closed the loophole when you addressed socialization being a shared experience and not a part of our essence, I buried my face in my hands. You do know this type well. Keep sharing, you are doing so much good by sharing.
Also, thank you with the encouragement to stick to my intuition. This is right now my biggest struggle at the moment.
Awww thank you!!! :D I'm glad that helped :D
More than I could have imagined. After continuing to look through a refined lens, I have begun detaching myself from more of these pervasive elements of environmental conditioning. My process of differentiation is now picking through "me" with a finer tooth comb than before, and I am better able to understand this intangible self as it is further separated from the environment.
Again, thank you very much.
Sameeeee.
Agree. We are not likely moldable, although adaptive. Not likely to change our mind without logical reasons of new information to do so. And certainly not changing course when foreseeing many inevitable events that will eventually unfold and take place. I would say we're definatetly glued to our positions until there is no longer a need to be, which could turn out to be our whole duration of life.
As a whole, we are all maturing and gleaning from eachother's strengths. I too certainly have gained wisdom with age and experience and from influence of others.
I see you had much fun with narcissists as well. For them we are like fish bite on fishermans pole, like sheeps for the wolfes when the shepherd is on holiday. But thank God we have a major advantage over them: We can learn from lessons, they can only judge them.
True with that bold claim...A part of me believes that nothing really matters and at the same time still try to find meaning in everything so like living life has always a depressive connotation...
Interesting description. As an INFP there's an INFJ in my life I trust and admire deeply. She's honest, quiet, authentic, reliable. We don't talk that often being both introverts, but when we do I know I can trust everything she says. I can see your point when you say that, even if it may not seem that way on the surface, an INFJ will tend to do what they really want can deeply influence the lives of other people around them in a quiet, subtle but effective way because they really mean what they say or do.
I like your channel.
You provide value by being genuine and really sharing what you think and have learned.
INFJ here. So, I have this thing about the universe and how if everything happens for a reason then everything we do is predetermined, which means my life is already laid out before me and I have no choice but to float along with it. I really dislike this train of thought because it means I'm just a vessel for an inevitable outcome, which means the actions I do are essentially meaningless. I prefer to think in a way of 'everything always works out in the end.' I hold great faith in the tides of the universe and I know that despite the many storms we encounter in this journey, there will always be a calm, clear day proceeding those rough ones.
Really refreshing insights from a person who herself in not an INFJ but has in-depth understanding of our type. ..makes me feel understood without explaining myself...which I never do!
we care about what people think but at the same time we value too much our own ideas that we don't tend to conform to peoples standards. it is difficult to mould us because we are always skeptical about everything people say and do
Thank you for the "faith in the universe and everything happening for a reason" thing. Totally articulated something i couldn't find the words to explain. (if that makes any sense?) the whole video is basically on point, even with the parts you struggle to get your point through. i think INFJ's will totally understand what you meant. Especially because of the way you struggled to explain. i totally saw that you understood in the way you struggled to find a way to explain some of your points. i am impressed by your level of understanding. thank you for this video, really insightful.
As far as we INFJs struggle LESS with setting boundaries, yes, you are correct. I never realized boundaries were a problem for ENFJ. Thank you for sharing and for educating me. ABSOLUTELY...actions speak much louder than words. Blessings
I hate it when people don't have the common sense to understand the hints we provide. They expect everything has to be spoken to them in words.
Thank you SO much for acknowledging that we are not weak. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been called weak because of my kindness and wanting to help others. It takes strength to be kind and true to yourself in a cruel world. People try to mold me and it bothers me and confused me and it’s led my life to disequilibrium. But in a way I think you’re right in that I was always me or want to be me despite what people say and I still struggle with this and trusting who I am.
In a way, I feel like you are describing an assertive type of INFJ ind this video. I am more on the turbulent spectrum of INFJ and I resonate with a lot of the feelings described as an ENFJ. Such as knowing when not to argue/share - I overshare and talk way too much and lots of times I get hurt by being vulnerable.
You’re also right that INFJ’s look at people’s actions. I can’t tell you how many supportive words I can get from a friend but if they don’t back it up by physically being there for me or checking up on me and show they care, then it’s not as meaningful. Words are cheap sometimes.
You’re also right about us thinking that everything happens for a reason. That’s literally my mantra lol. On days where I can’t see the light or don’t understand why I’m going through so much hardship instead of trusting the universe, I get even more depressed.
I actually really like ENFJ’s and I wished I was one! Like you said, being an introvert and wanting to help so much is so draining and the energy supply is low lol.
I was there once, but it will just come to you. There's a certain tug deep down inside & that's why you don't entirely succumb to your depression.
You're a silent warrior, but a warrior nonetheless...❤
Not weak. We all needed to hear that. And your conviction and tone. Just. Thanks, very meaningful. Infj
How sweet are you to have such nice things to say about infj's. What a kind girl, with such a wealth of understanding and insight. God bless you for seeing the beauty in others the way you do. Thank you. You restored my faith in humanity today.
Thank you awww this is so sweet :)
I think INFJs are moldable more by people and things that inspire us, rather than typical social pressure
Spot ON!!! Yes, we need a free flow...and its usually amazing to watch things play out 99% of the time. The Universe certainly knows whats best.
The funny thing is people who aren't close to us think we are super mouldable and don't have a strong opinion about things, but people who are closed to us knows 💜
I found this whole “unmoldable” thing incredibly fascinating, especially when you brought up the door slam and bending around and giving my time and energy to others who don’t give back enough... it has made me come to the conclusion that I do not get along well with ENFPs in the context of close friendships. 😕 they’re such cool people and I’d love to be close with them, but I always feel incredibly insignificant and even unimportant in their lives, and then they question why I’m distanced from them, or why I even leave them
I have similar issues with an enfp friend right now. Do you still feel that way?
Omg. You can't possibly know just how much I needed that. In true INFJ fashion, I think I came across this video at the right time.
The whole knowing who we are thing. I was about 13 (lol) when i knew who i was. And people around me would always say that you don't know who you are until you're older. And I always felt squashed by that. But I never stopped thinking that I knew exactly who I was.. am. I am still discovering things about myself, but my core person is the same.
Thank you for this video. This is exactly the kind of thing we want. To know that the energy we put out actually helps someone and they actually use it to improve themselves and their own lives.
THANK YOU!!
Glad i stumbled on this video. This is very insightful, being one of the rarest personality is really exhausting when no one seems to understand you. You had me when you said that we believe that everything has a reason. You nailed it girl. It is our life's mission to figure out why we exist and what we can contribute to society. We hate inauthenticity and we loathe people doing selfish things.
I am now 46 years old. My mother was 18 when I was born in 1973. I was the weird kid growing up. I just discovered this personality and now I KNOW that I am not crazy. I am so overwhelmed with emotions and I need to slow down and not take too much in to fast. Thank you everyone for your contributions and helping me figure out how I work. Thank you
Thank you for this, Meghan! INFJ's are great at focusing on our faults and how 'alien' we feel. Re: being molded, I think on a surface level we are moldable, we adapt to the environments we are in, which becomes exhausting. Like you touched on, doing this for too long is draining which is why we dream of finding someone who we don't have to 'mold ourselves' to for the sake of harmony. But deep down we hold steady who we truly are and what is valuable to us. And people do affect us deeply, but in an indirect way. I may take that outside information and filter it through my Ni & Ti and modify my values if I feel like I learned something new about myself or society or humanity. I'm basically agreeing with you!
I just wanted to say that I find the way you speak beautiful, and I feel like you're somewhat talking to your gf/thinking about what you would want to say to her while sharing your insights with your audience, which makes it even more beautiful
I'm an INFJ and I believe everything in the Bible
Sean Sollars God bless 🙏🏾
ME TOO!
Yea I definitely went through that acceptance of the universe phase, and Ive learned so much about myself. "You influence the world, the world does not influence you" I love you
Your points and insight are spot on. Great video! We are deep, open, yet immovable. Usually friends who have always criticized me for what I wear, who I date, my decisions I took it as a grain of salt. I’d reflect and think deeply about it as a check and balance but I don’t assimilate. Eventually those people fall out of my life and then I feel a weight lifts. Often, I hear they mentioned being jealous of me for my confidence, the people I attract, or my stand alone nature. I’ve even gotten frenemies tell me they were sorry for what they did or said. I always appreciate their honesty but again, doesn’t really influence me to think or act differently. My response is usually... okay, thanks for proving my intuitive feeling of you right. We attract the crappiest people sometimes.
INFJs only second guess ourselves when the truth is staring at us and we see it but want to avoid it 😆 Second guessing is a tactic to stall or delay.
I’m an Infj and I struggle with the idea that nothing happens for a reason. You are spot on.
I definitely am difficult to mold... I feel like there have been people that molded me in my adolescence, but as I mature and build a better idea of who I am and where I want to go, it's hard for me to let people sway my ways. We're so damn stubborn about what we believe and our values truly come first. It's almost impossible for someone to change that. That's not to say we're like a rock with all things. We are very open-minded people and receive outside information on an equal ground. We're just choosy about what information we allow to affect us. (due to tertiary Ti)
Wow, this has got to be the best and most insightful video on INFJs (from another type's perspective) yet! It's so true that we can't really be molded by others. Since forever people have tried to tell me what to do and I've always(even as a teen) just smiled and nodded and went on to do whatever I wanted to do anyway. All the points you mentioned are most definitely true for me. It takes a special kind of emotional intelligence to be able to observe these things:) Thank you and I love you ENFJs too:) You are precious and please never doubt your worth
Wow! She sums everything up so well! As an INFJ myself I find her insights so inspiring and accurate, almost brings a tear to my eye!
Well done Meghan. You have great insight! I'm an INFJ and you resonate very much with me. Love your comment "wait for clarity". I have a pretty good intuition about people but if I know that I will be around them for a while - like workmates I like to "wait for clarity" before I decide to invest in them in any way. Most of the time my initial intuition is correct. Thanks for taking the time for this video series. Love people who make the effort to understand people. The world would be a better place if we all took the time to have empathy and compassion for our fellow humans.
*INFJ to the world and all existence:* “I’m not trapped in here with you, you’re trapped in here with me!”
"Everything happens for a reason" very good insight, the first of INFJ discussions where I've seen this observation. Yes, the universe is indeed evolving toward the Greater Good, therefore everything....
Meghan you are fantastic .... People will try to negatively impact for their own benefit while it hurts you.... Never let it happen... At the end of all things it is you that has to live with the impacts of your choice making not others. I am 45 and I'm an infj, since being hurt physically and emotionally by others because I don't follow other people belief system of others/society I have a lived outcasted by most people that have met me. It created a small bit of doubt within me, but I don't regret my way. I know who I am and what moral grounds I choose to stand on. Influence is powerful, I use love and respect as a guide while some toxic people use negative means to use people. So my message to you is this: no one will love and respect you more than your self and at some point a worthy person will cherish you fully to their capacity... You are great just be you the world needs more real people who are smart and respect human life. Life is meant to be shared positively with others while the toxic can share their toxic with like minded individuals not with the positive like minded people. I can sense you seemed to be hurting slightly... Don't give that energy... Your focus is needed for your self elsewhere. Loves for you!!!! Never surrender to other people's poor behavior, they are not you.🙂
Wow incredibly understanding great work! I don’t believe everything happens for a reason. I use that Ni (I’m cursed at 96%) to start making things happen for a reason in striving for greatness for present and future generations! 😊
At 11:47, I think that, personally, I don’t get moved or influenced in that way because often I see things from a universal perspective. If someone says something offensive to me, why would I limit my happiness that day just over an opinion. There’s just so so much more to life!!! I know who I am, that person doesn’t. There’s so much more to life then wasting energy on offence and limiting your happiness!!! There’s just too much beauty and meaning in life then to waste it all away on anxiety about what they said, resentment from what they said and bitterness from not letting go of what they said - all of which is limiting your ability to enjoy the overwhelming sense of beauty in which we’re all in! You are an amazing woman, you got this!!
Very on target I’m infj and could relate well to all of your observations. I find I have to protect my energy. I am also have not wanted to mold in any way to what someone else thinks I should be. I’m very comfortable with who I am and what I believe. I’m older, 56 so some of this could be age related. I did also know who I was at a very young age. I feel the energy of the world around me and act according to what it’s telling me. Everything is grey in my world not black and white. Thanks for this you are clearly paying close attention. 😊
one of my best friends is an infj, she's incredible! had a difficult time understanding her for a while but after researching the type i was able to truly comprehend her actions and thinking process a lot better. my friend group comprises of two infps (including me), an intp, an intj, and that beautiful infj friend. i get the feeling that we're all soulmates. anyways, rock on infjs!
Wooow this makes me feel so much better. Sometimes I feel like I go with the flow and perhaps I mold too easily because of people...but maybe looking from another angle and looking at how many things have stayed the same ... I'm not that moldable. 🤔
I feel like you were spot on when you said we are unmoldable. We don’t care about social pressures because we know what we believe in and we strengthen our views in any way we know how. I think you have great insight and I am so happy that you are someone who understands us! Keep up the fantastic work and stay positive!
Thank you!!
Hey, great video. I am an INFJ, and I totally agree with your point on feeling depressed when my belief that everything happens for a reason is weakening.
Such a kind authentic person. Thanks for this and Bless You! ❤️
INFJ here; when I was in the army I was seen as a rebel 'cause I always asked WHY and got into trouble for that. Just a note; don't admire our solid understanding of what we want to do in life too much because we also over analyse everything and that can cause procrastination.
I know a person within the first 5 minutes of speaking with them. My feelings are very accurate, but not perfect. But if I am going to gamble, I will always go with my gut. I don't care what people think of me because I love me for my blessing and curse of being infj.
Meghan, the depth of your analysis is mildly frightening. As an INFJ, you have been pretty spot on so far.
One of the weirdest things I've noticed since discovering the mbti community and getting to know my personality type as infj is how much infj's are alike, I can spend so much time reading infj comments because it feels like I wrote them, also every once in a while I stumble on a comment of someone who is supposedly infj and know right away they aren't, it's weird, very weird. I wonder if anyone else feels like this too, I would love to be surrounded by infj's that also know they are infj's, that would be bliss, everything would be so easier and things would just work.
Thank you for this video. It's cool to see an outside perspective on the INFJ personality type. I'm an INFJ woman. Most of what you said rang true with me. I did at one point space out and had to go back and rewatch what you said. I'm borderline hermit INFJ, and literally have to hype myself to be around people. I'm very secure with myself, and I haven't changed myself for anyone. Even when those have tried to hurt me. The INFJ door slam is REAL. Believe me. Thank you for the video. I know this was posted months ago. Great observations!!!
Me unmoldable? That was probably that part that resonated with me the most. I've been told I make a Missouri mule look trainable, and I agree with that. While I have had influences over the years, I think I tend to be a "take me as I am" type of person. I also return that favor though. Come as you are, and welcome to a judgment free zone.
I knew at 10 I wanted to be an aircraft mechanic, and everything I did in school was to that end. Right after high school, I went to a community college for that. I work on computers now, but am working towards combining those two careers.
I've always had people ask me why I'm so hard on myself, and put myself under so much pressure. Until I started looking into personality types, I had no idea why I did those things. I just did it.
I also absolutely believe in quality over quantity in relationships. I'd rather have a few close friends that I know will be there, rather than surround myself with a bunch of flakes that only want the high points.
As for making the world a better place...I hope to. Otherwise was my life worth living?
And now that I've spent entirely too much time talking about myself.....
Also, joined your Facebook book page, and have enjoyed my time spent there.
I think I need to start taking notes so I can remember everything that comes to mind while watching the video.
Thank you so much for understanding!! I love you with all of my heart!!! I feel like I have never been more understood in my life I was getting so emotional because of it!! Thank you so much for understanding, I love you❤️
You literally just made me feel so understood... by someone as a stranger to me personally, more than anyone else in my personal life right now that is a friend or relative. More importantly, you gave me some reasons to focus on my strengths and weaknesses as an INFJ and also to not feel so ashamed or depressed when others don't understand my exact thought process. Like, SERIOUSLY, are you around Houston, TX, because I already want to become best friends with you and help each other grow together haha! Thank you so much for your insight and incredible perspective on being able to understand someone that thinks like me. You give me hope.
Aww omg that is so sweet of you!!! I’m from Missouri, I know a few people from college from Texas
Thank you Meghan. Stubborn indeed! I get what you mean. We can put ourselves in someone else's shoe but still, not our shoes. And yes, you don't need to fight, be at peace knowing who you are and that you accept every bit of it. Just be you, there's nothing wrong with you.
Thank you so much for all the kind and honoring attributes you have said about INFJs, which I am. I really appreciate your encouragement.
The trio combination of books, on your shelf is awesome. Social, sandwiched by trust, and what I assume, is a book on connection. Your bookshelf is a beautiful expression of you. Its like the holy trinity of humanity. I trust you already. Its nice to have to have genuine outside perspective. Its harder to get that, In my immediate life. I can also tell, that you are learning as you teach. Which is inviting, and I admire you for that. It makes me feel involved, rather than staring at a screen. You have a talent, You have a Voice. Thank you, for being you. Also, thank you for your closing advice. I have HUGE dreams, and even at 25, I feel like I have failed my lifetime goal already. But I've for some reason, been waiting for someone trustworthy, to... I guess... Confirm my permission, to put my blinders on, and just do it. I've always been afraid of what people will think, But I don't want to care anymore.. At least this deeply. Its exhausting, and I get more depressed, as my life passes, and I give it away to others. They never seem to know, what kind of impact it has. But its having less impact already.
Time is our most valuable currency. Our next breath is never promised to us, time cannot be borrowed on credit, and I hate to waste my time or somebody else's on fruitless endeavors. There is always a way for everyone to walk away satisfied from a situation with minimal compromise. (I'm INFJ)
Wow!, you are one very observant young lady, I have not come across a non INFJ that has such an understanding of what an INFJ is and how we operate, I couldn't fault anything you have said.
This is one of the best Personality Type videos I have seen, well done.
I thoroughly enjoyed your experience with INFJ's and what you've learned from them. I kept nodding along with pretty much everything you said. Thank you for sharing your experience. I'm really touched as an INFJ. It's true: I'm not mold-able in the end. I realize much of the world may not understand or approve of me and that's okay now that I'm older and discovered my true value, which comes from within and having a healthy, loving relationship with myself as a human being. It is through becoming more authentically me and sharing the true me with others that I've become blessed with sincere, encouraging friends. Life is tough, yes, yet it's a wondrous journey, so again thank you for this video and I wish you greater, richer self- and life-discovery, Meghan!
Only recently have I actually become so intrigued with personality types because I watched this video that popped up in my feed and it was on INFJs. Ya know, one of those interesting factoid channels that always has something like "woah" to talk about and so anyways~~~ the video was titled like "Why the INFJ is the most rare of the personality types" so I was like WOAH I'm going to check this out. And I did. And I was blown away by the fact that it was like explaining me and all the innermost parts of my being. I've never actually taken a personality test before, so I went ahead onto 16personalities or whatever it's called and I ended up, sure enough, getting INFJ as my end result. Now I'm so blown away by the fact that for once I'm actually being understood. I'm watching all these different youtubers talking about INFJs, even if they are or aren't one themselves. The point of what I'm saying is, hearing you talk about how like the INFJ doesn't let what other people think or say influence who they are and they are not easily molded, I just keep thinking in my head, it feels so good to be understood. Because you're right, I really have never been influenced by people, so I watch others around me changing for others and trying to impress me even sometimes in some way like saying they like something I'm into just because they know I am and I'm just like NO what are you doing, I hope you're not trying to be someone you're not here. Anywho, I always feel so different at school and just when I interact with anyone really that are my peers. I feel set apart and usually I just think, because I am a Christian and I have a Christian mindset, that it's because of my religion. But ever since I actually started learning more about personality types, I'm realizing why I feel so different and set apart all the time. And of course it is partly because of what I believe as a Christian but still! I've been going on a tangent but I just wanted to share my little story. I'm 16 and about to be 17 going into my senior year of high school btw. I feel like I should share that information? I don't know why? I appreciate your thoughtful videos!! Goodness I'm a mess lol bye now
Watching this video has made me realize so many things about myself. I am technically an ambivert (leaning more towards the introverted side), so I am a mix of INFJ and ENFJ traits.
you are so wise and have a very good understanding of people. Thank you for making this video, I feel understood
Coming from an INFJ, thank you, you are spot on.
I think the whole 'take it for what it is' from people who constantly tell me not to overanalyze other people's behavior and what they tell me verbally. I saw this on FB - Beneath every behavior there is a feeling, and beneath each feeling is a need. And when we meet that need rather than focus on the behavior, we begin to deal with the cause, not the symptom. I have had toxic family and friends emotionally project on me. When I got to the root of the issues, I found a better understanding of how people who are not INFJ work. That determined whether stuck around or I doorslammed them.
I appreciate your kind words. The LGBT example hit home - I think this contributed a lot to my inability to move from my stance even when it meant taking the pain of being seen a certain way (or abandoned) by people I cared about. When I am wrong about my intuition on a person, it is soul-crushing. My constant trying to hang in there and be there for people when they can't feel my loyalty and commitment to their happiness, that hurts. And words never do the deep feelings we have justice. No one ever believes how much we care. At the same time, I feel too vulnerable conveying them, so oftentimes I don't. My ENFJs are lifesavers, don't underestimate your own power. Literally one saved my life when I was extremely down.
This is so accurate I will sub now the only thing I disagree with is that I listen to people and consider there opinion I just rarely agree with them.
oh man that is so good didn't think about the reason something made me feel spiraling into depression. I need to keep this in mind. Great video!
I know who I am and what I think about life, while that amazes most people, it’s a kind of quiet resilience that drives my ENFJ husband in particular crazy. He wants to influence me and dominate me, align my thinking with his. He was unsure about his opinions before but throughout the years he self validated his own thoughts and now we’re at a stand still. He said of me I’m like a wild horse that needs to be tamed, and he’s up for the task. Both ENFJ and INFJ can be quite immovable.
i see a lot of things your saying back in myself and you're right about a lot of thing. a few sums up: 1 you said we spent our energy better. Basically we're most likely not to even give much energy. That why we're introvert and you are extrovert. Also we do doorslam indeed. When you don't seem to fit in out lives and or you hurt us we probably close the door for you and won't even tell you. This has a lot to do with staying close to who we are and protecting ourself. Also you said we don't really care about what others say. Basically we do really really much care. BUT our own standards and own critical mind is higher than anyone else and that's why we won't change so much.
I really loved your video. You got a great eye on who we are and we really respect and appreciate that we're understood.
Ty for yur Share.. Every perspective matters.. It helps us to learn and accept and to filter through our everyday Changes! Bless u Young one. #INFJ from GUAM
If there is one thing I've observed about enfjs as an infj it is the enfjs are super sharp, in any matter they put their minds to. Also, I'm always impressed by how accurate your videos on infjs are. How? Not even fuction based but scenario based. Incredible.
Wow, you just articulated the reasoning behind a lot of the ways I think, act, and feel out situations. Thank you for this😌
You're video is very generous and it's probably much more than we deserve. You're generous like the sun. That light is very much welcomed and means more to people than you realize so keep up the good work.
Completely agree with most everything you said in regards to us. Also wanted to put out that we do often envy extroverts for y'all's long social battery. Thanks for explaining all this because we often can't because it's hard to explain ourselves and often understand ourselves
This is my favourite video ever! Though I'm straight and got nothing from that homosexual comment you made--in all other comments you made, Meghan, in this video, thank you so very much! This video made my day! Though I have never met you, I love you and the beautiful kindness you offer to me and others in our lives! You make a very big difference in my life---even though you didn't know it. I am a huge fan! Thank you! :-)
Thank you for this video! As an INFJ healing mental health issues, a few of which stem from a whole bundle of feeling I was "wrong" the way I naturally operate, it's a joy to have these traits celebrated. You mention not having trust in the universe - and leaving a comment if so - and that is something I struggle with. Ironically, your video helps a little with that, but by and large I just can't get into a trust headspace and out of a the-universe-totally-doesn't-care one. Thank you again for making this video and sharing your perspectives.
Thank you! I am so happy you are doing these videos... 💝
Awkward the door slam... learned to give second chances
It was such a high complement for you to call out INFJs inner strength, even pushing us to realize it when we doubt it and think people have hurt and changed us. That we still stay strong. We tend to be too self critical and only focus on how we weren't perfect and where we failed and struggled, where others have hurt us, which makes us feel an even stronger need to build up more inner strength, clarify our values and analyze what people have said, but it's mean and self-critical-as you said. At least this is how it is for me. Only certain people see how self critical INFJs are, with other types, and I think ENFJs are great at seeing this. I think we share a unique understanding and feel a lot of the same pain. Your advice was SO spot on at the end. Thank you so much!!