Leave these older men alone!!!! 😢 Especially if you aren’t self sufficient. They date young to be in control and humiliate you to boost their deteriorating ego. 😵💫
A friend married a 78-year-old. She is 37. He came to Africa to get her. Married her and left. Lying to her, he is going to get her overseas. It's been 3 years. He doesn't want her to work. Get a house or a car. That old shit abuses her emotionally and financially. And he doesn't want her to do anything for herself. She is going to cut him off and start all over again. These old men are evil
Women need to be taught how to discern the difference in men of God, There is a St. Joseph, father to Christ or King Solomon with thousands of wives. Pray to God and be specific
Always have your own. Always. Don't even let him know about any extra funds you have. You're not lying to him. The climate we are in is danger, danger. 🇯🇲 🇯🇲
The common denominator in all of these women stories is religious beliefs. The church has indoctrinated Black women in thinking we should take BS from these men, it's so sad. That's why I always push, leave the church
All the more reason I’m always gonna make a broad go 50/50. Then yall holler about it knowing you 304s are sneaky. Yall the reason men don’t see marriage as shyt
One of my biggest flexes is that even in this economy, no man can EVER make me homeless! Ladies get that degree/certification even if you want to be a housewife.
Going for that double postgraduate honours!!! No man is allowed to make feel small again! My father was the first man to show me how unreliable men can be and he was the last.
"He is walking 10 step away from me in public" because he knew he was grooming somebody's half grown daughter and was ashamed to be caught in public. He used her as a bangmaid and free house cleaner and free care taker of his kid. Religion can 100% turn you into a pick me and she is the proof of it. Am i the only one who find her annoying and desperate, that grandpa broke up with her if he wouldn't have, she would've still stayed 🙄
@@unturned6066Probably by her father, too. But honestly, single fathers walking close to their kid(s) and the new partner walking a few feet behind is really common. Apparently, stepmothers recognize each other this way on the street.
I'm child free and I don't date men with kids. Single dads will never make you a priority in their lives. A man with kids also has less resources to give you.
Uh yeah. Kids are top priority and you’re just going to have to accept that (until they are adults and out of the house) anyone that wants to be too priority and put the kids on the back burner, you are the Antichrist.
@@Amazigh_MaeMaeShe sounds as if she was being a stepmother from hell. She sounds as if she comes from an unstable life and was looking for more of a father herself. She was looking for a Daddy Morbucks to just take care of her life. If he himself was spending significant amounts of time with his son, he clearly wasn't looking for a babysitter like so many people in the comment section are implying.
This I work occupational health most get left I. That 45-55 age range with no job experience and they stuck working low wages and broke since the man has been transferring money over the years so he’s broke on paper
A Christian husband is commanded to love his wife as Christ loves the church. Does Christ treat his church with disrespect? No. A husband who disrespects his wife, and fails to cherish and love her, sins against Christ.
I ain't gonna trust the religion that treats men as something made in the image of God, while treating women as an accessory made in the image of men, as something that is going to recognize the humanity in women. Anyone who expects Christians to be anything but male supremacists willing to tell any lie they can get away with to treat women as a enslaved lesser accessory built to serve men is fooling themselves.
My pastor used to tell us, ladies specifically to beware in church. There are so many hyaenas who prowl the streets devouring everything and everyone leaving nothing but ashes and bones yet when they think it's time to get married, they don't look for their own kind because they also despise and fear them so they go and look for sheep whom only they can devour but never have to worry about being devoured back. So they go to Church and pretend to be saved to find himself a good wife/prey. He has a devout wife honour bound to treat him well because of her faith but what of him? He was never a believer so the more she's good to him the more he pushes to see how far she can be abused and how much she can take before her faith breaks and she shatters so he can build her up in his own image or feast until nothing remains. He'll use her precious faith as a shackle to keep her married to abuse because lets face it, it's always the woman the gets blamed when the marriage goes sour, especially in religious communities where she'll be constantly told to "try better" or "pray more" because of how wonderful a man "brother so and so" is. So she's stuck with a manipulator if she's lucky and a sadistic psychopath getting off on the praise as he defiles what is considered good if she's unlucky. So ladies and gentlemen (this can happen to men too) becareful! Wait on the Lord, I know it's hard and it's easy to take shortcuts. This is also me reminding myself not to take the easy way out too!
I dated a single dad with a daughters. He had full custody of the kids. It started out great but eventually the kids didnt want us to be close and wouldnt listen to me. He started treating me like a nanny, so I left.
She needed a place to stay he needed a new younger woman to use as an emotional punching bag. You both needed something. You didn't marry for love. Find a new place to stay heal from that loser. And work as much as you can get your own place
Ngl as soon as I heard theres a 19 year difference between them my first thought was 'he's old enough to be her father why is he eyeing her and pressuring her into marriage'
My now ex-husband love bombed me in the beginning, but after a couple of months, his true colors came out. I thank God I learned early in life not to become dependent on anyone, especially a man, for my resources. When he decided he wanted his freedom, I had saved money, had a career, and left him with no stress. I tell my daughter's all the time make sure you can do for self. Don't let anyone fool you to put your destiny in someone's hands. Most men try to use their money and having a woman who's dependent on them to be controlling. Having a man's resources is a bonus because if he ever switches up, I will gladly walk away.
Why would any young woman without kids commit herself to a much older male with children??? I'm struggling to find empathy for her because common sense would've told me that this isn't a man you should marry. 😂😂😂
I had a coworker that dealt with a guy 20 years her senior with 10 kids! his eldest told her that her father was a loser and she needs to run. She still didn't listen. It took her to get in an altercation where she got arrested for her to finally leave him alone.
…Because of her faith and fairytale BS. Some of the faithful need to be made to understand that not everyone that professes to be “good Christians” with moral values lives by those values. Also love and marriage don’t magically change a selfish heart. Those are happily ever after stories for children.
Very sad. She was desperate and got in this situation. The man was thinking he can find a young attractive woman and lock her down, watching all the podcasts thinking he can mold this young lady but then he realized she is young but her own person lol Girl, be thankful he didn’t make you a single mom and run - get some counseling then date later when you mature a little The man is too grown for this situation
@@LoveK1 Right. People usually ask about kids before divorce. It would be better for her not to say he divorced her though because men will look at that and judge her. She should just say it was a mutual situation - and delete this video from the internet 😆
My ex did this to me, and stole 10 years of my life. Destroyed my credit, stole my child bearing years….never ever get with a man with kids if you’re a young woman
As a newly single mother, (6 years, 1 kid, broken engagement) I will never understand why woman without kids would involuntarily date a single father. The saying “always put your kids first” leaned too much on one side in our relationship. This was me with our kids father. Always family time, barely us time, always on the go knowing he didn’t have to ask watching our kid, solely cooking/cleaning when I was also working, being the “peace” wasn’t even enough when he couldn’t handle any express of my needs regardless of tone, and the audacity to say he lost connection when he’s avoidant . The list goes on and it builds up over time. Absolutely crushed my self worth just to make him happy. If a man makes you feel bad for communicating your needs, you will never be enough for him, no matter how good he looks on paper.
I’ve had a few hard times in my life, including having my husband walk out on me, and one thing I learned is there is always a blessing around the corner. No matter how much you “proof” your life if there’s a lesson meant for you to learn you’ll have to humble yourself.
Seems they used each other and she didn’t expect him to leave her because of her commitment. It also seems she has come from a family of poverty and homelessness. She better break the chains herself.
I was looking for someone that’s sees her role in this! It’s not all on him. Moving in with some one that fast and marrying them just to have a place to stay and saying it was for religious reasons is insane. She needed an out because of her financial issues as well as her families. He showed her who he is, she was desperate and ignored it and turned herself into a victim. There are definitely a lot of things she dealt with that were fucked up, but he showed her VERY early on that his son is number one and caring about her needs outside of finances were not important to him.
I wouldn't say so. I think she felt they needed each other & romanticised that. I'm christian & we both believe in marriage. You need someone to help with household stuff, I need a provider. That is the stuff tradwives sell as romantic synchronicity & codepence, not as "using each". The difference is she wanted to take it a step further & create an emotional bond, he wasn't here for that
Ma’am he just wanted someone to care for his son and u fall for it. Get ur shit together and depend on no one for nothing and even if u depend on someone n things don’t go right, u have ur own. He just wanted a maid
There’s no such thing as being territorial dating anyone with kids, that is a problematic ideology. When you’re secure you WANT the other parent in that kids in y’all lives. Dysfunction is believing you shouldn’t be a cordial communicating family with one another
He is a vile person. I have compassion for this young woman. She did not know what to expect. She's too young to blame her when he's 19 years older and knows better. Just because you're a Christian doesn't mean you marry just anyone. You have to pray about that and get confirmation. Based on her instability at home it sounds like she moved out of desperation. I hope she has learned and becomes stronger.❤
@tajahmusic you are entitled to your opinion. I still say she was a child and didn't know any better. I'd hate to know what you'd say if your child was in a similar situation at that age. You might not be so quick to agree with the law that she's an adult. Laws set by men who legalized teenagers in order to have $exual access to them, put them to work, and send them to war. Look into the history of why certain ages are considered legal. It's not because they are equipped. In fact they used to be even younger. Most people think they know what they're doing at that age, but they don't. That's why healthy parents are important. I do not believe in adultifying children.
@@helena3631 full advantage. Thank you for having compassion towards her. I can't believe how people can look past a grown man using this young woman and blame her.
I'm going to disagree. I do not feel sorry for her. She married him as she had no place to stay - she starts with this. Neither was ready for a marriage under these circumstances.
Right, thats what I wanna know. Notice she didn't talk about that. She married him for shelter despite his character. Now she's back in the same situation. So she got her results 🤷🏽♀️
She was desperate but I think she probably thought God was sending him to her at the right time - like not actually assessing the person but wanting to believe God sent her a husband right on time
I just don’t like the fact that some Christians would make mistakes and blame Christianity or God for it. Nothing good ever comes out of desperation. As a woman, make sure you have your own stuff first before you even think abt getting in a relationship. Just in case it doesn’t work out, you’d still be ok and not be homeless. I bet if she prayed abt it God would’ve said no. The same way God can send people into ur lives is the same way the enemy can as well. You need to have the discernment to tell which and what is for you, and being desperate can make you choose wrongly.
This is why you can’t marry a man for lifestyle without love. Don’t pretend you’re a Christian if you’re living with a man already when you married him for money. Lauryn hill wrote a whole song about this.
“Talking out your neck saying you’re a Christian. That was the sin that did jezebel in. Giiiiirrrls you know you better WATCH OUT. Some guys some guys are only about that thing!”
Y'all Christians love love loooove to judge each other, and it's one of my favorite things to observe from the sidelines. I especially love the part where people who judge others are usually also hypocrites living that sinful life. I love to see it. Lol.
I’m a bit confused Sounds like she jumped into this too quickly Also she is married so she is guaranteed some kind of protection under the law There’s no way he can just throw her out of the martial home unless he has a court order or something
It's important to be able to take care of yourself whether you're a man or woman. House, car, job, etc are BASIC NECESSITIES. You shouldn't marry someone because you need a place to stay. That's very unstable. Shouldn't even be dating sweet heart.
I was raised by a single Mom. And baby she thought to make sure to always have my own… and I thank and Bless God every day for my mom. Cause of her I refuse to allow a man to play in my face.
Something about this story isn’t adding up. Girl you picked him knowing he has a child. Some people just like to hear themselves talk I swear. Girl bye. Next!
This kind of happened to me, but I had a job with savings. He love bombed me, had a kid who I genuinely loved, wanted me to move in with him. I did and didn't have a job yet and he got sooooo abusive, trying to kick me out in freezing temps. I had a job a few months later and I never trusted him again.
Sounds like the one I was dating. “Christian man who wants a Christian wife but not willing to sit in the head of the household role”. Single dad rushing to marry me and he couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to get married so quick. Tried to find every reason under the sun. To top it off, he wanted me to sign a prenup and I’d still be working while being a primary homemaker. I asked him what would he be helping with in the home and he just kept talking about his job.
That’s what I’m saying.. she didn’t have to leave cuz the cops even wouldn’t have allowed it. She doesn’t know her rights and the only reason she should’ve left was if her life was in danger.. other than that she needs to go home
What this lady is saying I been through this! His whole family was against us because they thought I was there for the money! Kids were not welcoming of me. I was the “evil stepmom” label and they didn’t even know me yet lol. He begin to listen to them and short me. Older men are not dumb! Especially successful ones, they know you want money and will drain you of your youth for money
Yet conservative traditional men & women are always pushing to submit, rely & stay home & this Is what happens a lot. Husband cheats or just leaves & you’re left struggling.
The walking ahead of you thing is one of my biggest red flags. If you and your long legs wanted to walk alone you should have left me at home in peace. It’s a clear sign of how inconsiderate they are.
I have noticed that all of these women make having a husband their whole personality. “My husband” this, “My husband” that. It’s cringe. It’s like they stop their whole lives for their husband. It just shows me that they have low self-esteem.
She should have never left the marital home. Plus an older man wants control and they are self serving. I tried dating a single dad twice one who was 20 years older and had grown kids but they were still living with him and another single dad my age with children under 18 who had his kids full time and he had me meet the kids fairly quickly and they started to accompany us on dates. If you are childfree don’t date men with kids. The kids will always come before you whether they are children or adults.
If you choose to be a stay at home wife, make him give you a decent allowance/salary, and invest in your retirement fund. Save all that money, and let him pay for all expenses. If he can't afford it, don't quit your job, or find yourself a better provider.
My man told me he don’t want me working but I will be back to work it’s giving struggle love I’m hood off that I like having my own cause I like nice things I like to look nice he can afford a place for us to live food travel expenses but I’m high maintenance in personal needs it’s not enough money coming to keep sitting at home lmfao
He was totally just looking for someone to raise his kids. That's all. Young ladies stay away from these old roosters. I don't care how much money they have, no matter how many compliments they pay you. Stay away. They bad mouth older women because we won't put up with their mess. Please learn earlier in life to do the same. Hopefully the judge will see all that she had sacrificed and will grant her a good amount of alimony. She needs to find a women's shelter and get a case manager and an advocate. transmute those tears.
I do think the the effects of religion on black people in different cultures is something that should be talked about though, and it is partly to blame because of the purity culture and fear tactics attached to said religion. That said, it is annoying when people use religion as an excuse for every bad decision they make or being an awful person.
Here’s some REAL ADVICE for women in your 20s but you probably going to learn the hard way. Stop exchanging your time, beauty, youth and sex for money and stability with older men. They are not impressed by you, they ARE using you. I’ve been there done that! 11yrs wasted. Find someone around ur age. Yall grow together. Please stop the SAHM stuff! Keep money! What girl is saying I been hereeeeee 😫😫😫 you will come 7th place in his life. His family will be jealous of your youth and beauty. Older men are boring with decent sex. You deserve better!
Reasons not to date men with kids if you don't have kids 1. The fact that he is not with the childs mother is a huge red flag. Most times the childs mother is not with him for a reason. 2. You will never ever be a priority. You will always be put last even after the baby mama. 3. Most times these men are broke or at the very least they are paying for another womans household taking money from your lifestyle. 4. Kids can be very disrespectful and he will likely take kids and baby mamas side. 5. Him sleeping with baby mama is extremely common and they will both laugh at you because baby mama is still getting paid and using him how she wants. Just dont devalue yourself unless you are ok with constant disrespect and being a free maid or nanny.
Not to mention what kind of son that man is raising by making him the center of his world and showing this child how to dispose of women so easily. Sad.
He can’t just kick her out depending on the state. But there were SO many signs that he was never about her just from that first clip. Sad she didn’t see the red flags.
So she wasn’t okay with shacking up because she’s a “Christian” but she was perfectly fine with dating and marrying a never-married single father in 4 months? What happened to folks taking their Ls in PEACE? 😂😅 Odd behavior. SMH
Religion is not en excuse to rush into a relationship let alone a marriage, you have to have discernment, the Bible say test the spirit, if she would’ve taken her time getting to know him she would’ve not ended up in that situation.
You never choose a man or to move to the next step when you’re in a state of desperation. Having nowhere to live is NOT a reason to marry and move in with someone…. What?!?
I hate seeing her on the internet crying giving him the satisfaction he wants. Pick your head up baby and get your shit together. Praise GOD you don’t have a child by him. Get a divorce and get YOURS. You’ll be okay. ❤❤❤
Because romantic partners come and go. You have no obligation to them. You do however have an obligation to the ones that came out of you. As they are of your flesh and blood and they depend on you from birth until they are grown and self sufficient. To put anyone (that isn’t God) above/before them is 1) disgusting, 2) disrespectful to your children who look at you as a role model and teacher, 3) just all around giving deadbeatism.
She was homeless before him and she’s homeless after him. This is her fault. No one else’s. Why wouldn’t she stack her money when she was living with him? Tf?
Territorial? She's possessive, and she probably was fighting for his attention and time. You signed up to be a mom, and she wasn't ready. She wanted a boyfriend, not a husband.
So, she wasn't against being there with him and his child but he never appreciated her for it. Couldn't even take her out on a date, show his love for her, etc. I mean she said he would literally walk ahead of her and his child when they were out and about. That just tell me he doesn't want to be seen with her. Just sad.
Everything would be perfectly fine my now ex husband would literally kiss my cheek or forehead leaving for work (hella early in the morning so I'd be sleeping but light sleeper so I'd immediately wakeup) & would then ghost me for days - MONTHS... The smear campaign was unfuxxing real... Telling everybody the wildest fights happening & everyone believed it... Because of my supposed attitude & who in their right mind would just abruptly ignore & disappear randomly hiding from their wife... Their PREGNANT WIFE with 2 other toddlers (all 3 children are his btw) ??? I must be lying! & then I'd be pressured (to put it nicely) in to forgiving him & taking him back because ultimately it was my shortcomings as a wife AND the Bible says blah blah blah I want to share more but I'd be sitting here for days. I'm still waiting on the revelation of those "NOT" males... Where are they? Since XYs always want to target & attack my comments
This woman doesn't sound like she wants to ever be a parent. She sounds like she would be the type of jealous mother, even if she gave birth to her own children. She should STAY child free.
Her ex-husband never loved her. He did not have any interest in getting to know her and appreciating her for the woman she is. He used her naivete and religious beliefs against her. I think religion does a huge disservice to most women.
If you see a man walking ahead of a woman and they almost look like they arnt together, that man is more than likely a narcissist. When i was with my fiance he would walk ahead on purpose and when i was pregnant i pulled him on it and he said i walked to slow. This man would speed his walk up, when i caught up 😂 I had no self worth to put up with that for as long as i did! Be alone for a few years and stay celebate! Older men are great at manipulation, be careful
Naw, she was homeless & forced that relationship to have someone take care of her & her family and he was irritated by her. SHE DIDN'T KNOW HIM. Most men do not want to take care of everything & christianity & being naive will get these young girls caught up. And these old men are manipulative & angry. Im not sure what shes crying about. She need to count her blessings. She need to get herself together not worry about her family who cleary didnt set her up well for adulthood.
At the risk of sounding apathetic, it’s 2024 not 1824… How are women still getting roped into situations like this? Sure a lot of these dudes are awful, but also, like on the barest of minimums, why are women STILL not making sure they have a security blanket and put they’re whole lives in a man’s hands off “love.” Money, like love, can run out.
Leave these older men alone!!!! 😢 Especially if you aren’t self sufficient. They date young to be in control and humiliate you to boost their deteriorating ego. 😵💫
Say it again. They are a waste
One more time for the ppl in the back ! ❤
A friend married a 78-year-old. She is 37. He came to Africa to get her. Married her and left. Lying to her, he is going to get her overseas. It's been 3 years. He doesn't want her to work. Get a house or a car. That old shit abuses her emotionally and financially. And he doesn't want her to do anything for herself. She is going to cut him off and start all over again. These old men are evil
This theirs a reason why they are single at they big age
This
These church men who love to keep up an image are absolutely dangerous...
l Agree💯
This
Ain’t got nothing to do with church men. This dude wasn’t nobody’s fool. And of course yall strictly believe the woman
Women need to be taught how to discern the difference in men of God, There is a St. Joseph, father to Christ or King Solomon with thousands of wives. Pray to God and be specific
He married this young lady to care for his child.
Yes she says that she knew that and didn't mind but ahe thought she'd be appreciated
Tf outta here. Yall believe anything these lying 304s say. Thats why relationships are jokes nowadays
I think it was more for image, than anything.
Always have your own. Always. Don't even let him know about any extra funds you have. You're not lying to him. The climate we are in is danger, danger. 🇯🇲 🇯🇲
Yes indeed it IS dangerous out here. Warn all the single women in your lives, this is war being waged between the two sexes. WAR!!
The common denominator in all of these women stories is religious beliefs. The church has indoctrinated Black women in thinking we should take BS from these men, it's so sad. That's why I always push, leave the church
I rather lie than die in the ❄️ ⛄️
All the more reason I’m always gonna make a broad go 50/50. Then yall holler about it knowing you 304s are sneaky. Yall the reason men don’t see marriage as shyt
Exactly, and Priscilla said it well: if they have the power to feed you, they have the power to starve you
One of my biggest flexes is that even in this economy, no man can EVER make me homeless! Ladies get that degree/certification even if you want to be a housewife.
This many women I went to school with got thier license and stated if they get married they will stay home a bit to raise the kids
Going for that double postgraduate honours!!! No man is allowed to make feel small again! My father was the first man to show me how unreliable men can be and he was the last.
Especially if you want to be a 'house' wife.
i relate to this a loooot , good luck with everything, i'm sure you got it, all love@@byleemalox2265
"He is walking 10 step away from me in public" because he knew he was grooming somebody's half grown daughter and was ashamed to be caught in public. He used her as a bangmaid and free house cleaner and free care taker of his kid. Religion can 100% turn you into a pick me and she is the proof of it. Am i the only one who find her annoying and desperate, that grandpa broke up with her if he wouldn't have, she would've still stayed 🙄
That's what she's brought up to believe in, after all
@@unturned6066Probably by her father, too.
But honestly, single fathers walking close to their kid(s) and the new partner walking a few feet behind is really common. Apparently, stepmothers recognize each other this way on the street.
@@SalLy-ec9cn that’s so sad that this is normal
I agree with the sentiment but she was in her mid twenties wasn’t she?
This and the fact she has no family is a big red flag she stated she has nowhere to live
I'm child free and I don't date men with kids. Single dads will never make you a priority in their lives. A man with kids also has less resources to give you.
Yep especially if it is father and son. Also if you never have a kid yourself just don't do it.
Yes! It's not practical or natural. You will always sacrifice more in the relationship and come last to the child and the BM/BD.
Uh yeah. Kids are top priority and you’re just going to have to accept that (until they are adults and out of the house) anyone that wants to be too priority and put the kids on the back burner, you are the Antichrist.
Made that mistake before no single men with kids you have kids it’s a turn off
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 men with kids is an absolute NO. I’m single childfree and I don’t entertain men with kids. They are the bottom of the barrel.
Something isn’t adding up 😮 . She also said she married him because she had nowhere to go . Don’t marry out of Nesecity or need
exactly! there are two sides to the story. She could have been the stepmother from hell!
@@Amazigh_MaeMae exactly they both have my side eyes because marriage after 4 months! Sheesh .
@@Amazigh_MaeMaeShe sounds as if she was being a stepmother from hell. She sounds as if she comes from an unstable life and was looking for more of a father herself. She was looking for a Daddy Morbucks to just take care of her life. If he himself was spending significant amounts of time with his son, he clearly wasn't looking for a babysitter like so many people in the comment section are implying.
Right, she's a bum. Married him because she had no place to go and no place to go after he leaves her, get your life together
No one can convince me that anything done in the name of "Christianity" EVER works out for WOMEN.
It doesn't. It was created by men and for wm.
I really love the fact that so many women are waking tf up! 😩🙌🏾🥰🤗
When I see Christian I know it is a dog whistle for “I am a POS , but will use a god to justify it”.
Christianity did not make her marry that man though.
@@anikozoe5028right ! I don’t think Christianity made her marry just after 4 months for a place to stay
Future of most tradwives. Pipeline of being tradwife to homeless is very real 💅
This I work occupational health most get left I. That 45-55 age range with no job experience and they stuck working low wages and broke since the man has been transferring money over the years so he’s broke on paper
@@helena3631oh 💩 😢 how terrible. That is so scary.
19 year age gap😂, when will women learn!
The predatory men who chase young women need to be the blame here!
A Christian husband is commanded to love his wife as Christ loves the church. Does Christ treat his church with disrespect? No. A husband who disrespects his wife, and fails to cherish and love her, sins against Christ.
Its juust so weird because it seems like Christian husband never have an issue sinning against Christ. The worse stories always involve Christian men.
I ain't gonna trust the religion that treats men as something made in the image of God, while treating women as an accessory made in the image of men, as something that is going to recognize the humanity in women.
Anyone who expects Christians to be anything but male supremacists willing to tell any lie they can get away with to treat women as a enslaved lesser accessory built to serve men is fooling themselves.
Say that again for those who weren't paying attention!
Exactly. This woman made a decision without consulting God and now she’s paying for it. I don’t feel bad for her at all.
My pastor used to tell us, ladies specifically to beware in church. There are so many hyaenas who prowl the streets devouring everything and everyone leaving nothing but ashes and bones yet when they think it's time to get married, they don't look for their own kind because they also despise and fear them so they go and look for sheep whom only they can devour but never have to worry about being devoured back.
So they go to Church and pretend to be saved to find himself a good wife/prey. He has a devout wife honour bound to treat him well because of her faith but what of him? He was never a believer so the more she's good to him the more he pushes to see how far she can be abused and how much she can take before her faith breaks and she shatters so he can build her up in his own image or feast until nothing remains.
He'll use her precious faith as a shackle to keep her married to abuse because lets face it, it's always the woman the gets blamed when the marriage goes sour, especially in religious communities where she'll be constantly told to "try better" or "pray more" because of how wonderful a man "brother so and so" is. So she's stuck with a manipulator if she's lucky and a sadistic psychopath getting off on the praise as he defiles what is considered good if she's unlucky. So ladies and gentlemen (this can happen to men too) becareful! Wait on the Lord, I know it's hard and it's easy to take shortcuts. This is also me reminding myself not to take the easy way out too!
I dated a single dad with a daughters. He had full custody of the kids. It started out great but eventually the kids didnt want us to be close and wouldnt listen to me. He started treating me like a nanny, so I left.
Never date men with kids they will discard you ..
Why would you MARRY A SINGLE FATHER?????????
She didn’t want to shack up and she was homeless marriage don’t mean nothing to a old Dusty especially if the women left him with this damn kid
why did he marry wonam that much younger?????
@@vladimirazubcekova7727exactly!
Where are the tradwives at 😂????? This is why women need to be independent!
Facts
And they will fight you if you advise them,
@@Jane-ms2fz exactly. Leave them they’ll soon find out.
You need plan A,B,C not worth the energy waiting for the other show to drop I will rather be single
you can be a trad wive and still make your own money
No one deserves to go through that. That man is absolute trash. I hope she can find real help.
She needed a place to stay he needed a new younger woman to use as an emotional punching bag.
You both needed something. You didn't marry for love.
Find a new place to stay heal from that loser. And work as much as you can get your own place
Ngl as soon as I heard theres a 19 year difference between them my first thought was 'he's old enough to be her father why is he eyeing her and pressuring her into marriage'
My now ex-husband love bombed me in the beginning, but after a couple of months, his true colors came out. I thank God I learned early in life not to become dependent on anyone, especially a man, for my resources. When he decided he wanted his freedom, I had saved money, had a career, and left him with no stress. I tell my daughter's all the time make sure you can do for self. Don't let anyone fool you to put your destiny in someone's hands. Most men try to use their money and having a woman who's dependent on them to be controlling. Having a man's resources is a bonus because if he ever switches up, I will gladly walk away.
Why would any young woman without kids commit herself to a much older male with children??? I'm struggling to find empathy for her because common sense would've told me that this isn't a man you should marry. 😂😂😂
I had a coworker that dealt with a guy 20 years her senior with 10 kids! his eldest told her that her father was a loser and she needs to run. She still didn't listen. It took her to get in an altercation where she got arrested for her to finally leave him alone.
Please do. Because she had to learn and hopefully other women are seeing this.
…Because of her faith and fairytale BS. Some of the faithful need to be made to understand that not everyone that professes to be “good Christians” with moral values lives by those values. Also love and marriage don’t magically change a selfish heart. Those are happily ever after stories for children.
She said she was homeless and didn’t want to shack up
I’m not struggling to find empathy for her because I have none. She’s a bum.
Just to say right now you’re hurt, but she doesn’t realise just how good her life is going to be soon. She is going to be living her LIFE ❤
Very sad. She was desperate and got in this situation.
The man was thinking he can find a young attractive woman and lock her down, watching all the podcasts thinking he can mold this young lady but then he realized she is young but her own person lol
Girl, be thankful he didn’t make you a single mom and run - get some counseling then date later when you mature a little
The man is too grown for this situation
Right, when you have no kids you can keep starting over. She got a lucky break.
@@LoveK1 Right. People usually ask about kids before divorce. It would be better for her not to say he divorced her though because men will look at that and judge her. She should just say it was a mutual situation - and delete this video from the internet 😆
@@DrKrysRacquelit's funny that the same dudes who will judge women for getting a divorce, will also judge women for being divorced 😅
Definitely! I think they judge her even more of the man divorces her (versus her filing) but they won’t admit it
@@DrKrysRacquelwhy would you advise a woman to lie to a man just so he wouldn’t “judge” her 😂 what happened to honesty and transparency
I feel for her. But part of me feels like she isn’t telling the full story .
She is very pretty. This is sad that she did not recognize her worth
My ex did this to me, and stole 10 years of my life. Destroyed my credit, stole my child bearing years….never ever get with a man with kids if you’re a young woman
And yet, he did NONE of what you ex did lol
@@13579hee which is why I said my ex did this “and” everything else I listed. My comment was about my experience, and giving my advice.
Homegirl married a man 19 years older than her after 4 months of dating!!
As a newly single mother, (6 years, 1 kid, broken engagement) I will never understand why woman without kids would involuntarily date a single father.
The saying “always put your kids first” leaned too much on one side in our relationship. This was me with our kids father. Always family time, barely us time, always on the go knowing he didn’t have to ask watching our kid, solely cooking/cleaning when I was also working, being the “peace” wasn’t even enough when he couldn’t handle any express of my needs regardless of tone, and the audacity to say he lost connection when he’s avoidant . The list goes on and it builds up over time. Absolutely crushed my self worth just to make him happy.
If a man makes you feel bad for communicating your needs, you will never be enough for him, no matter how good he looks on paper.
I’ve had a few hard times in my life, including having my husband walk out on me, and one thing I learned is there is always a blessing around the corner. No matter how much you “proof” your life if there’s a lesson meant for you to learn you’ll have to humble yourself.
So true!
👏🏾💕👏🏾💕👏🏾💕👏🏾💕👏🏾💕👏🏾💕
Seems they used each other and she didn’t expect him to leave her because of her commitment. It also seems she has come from a family of poverty and homelessness. She better break the chains herself.
This part
I was looking for someone that’s sees her role in this! It’s not all on him. Moving in with some one that fast and marrying them just to have a place to stay and saying it was for religious reasons is insane. She needed an out because of her financial issues as well as her families. He showed her who he is, she was desperate and ignored it and turned herself into a victim. There are definitely a lot of things she dealt with that were fucked up, but he showed her VERY early on that his son is number one and caring about her needs outside of finances were not important to him.
Agreed.
He clearly exploited her situation.
I wouldn't say so. I think she felt they needed each other & romanticised that. I'm christian & we both believe in marriage. You need someone to help with household stuff, I need a provider. That is the stuff tradwives sell as romantic synchronicity & codepence, not as "using each". The difference is she wanted to take it a step further & create an emotional bond, he wasn't here for that
Ma’am he just wanted someone to care for his son and u fall for it. Get ur shit together and depend on no one for nothing and even if u depend on someone n things don’t go right, u have ur own. He just wanted a maid
There’s no such thing as being territorial dating anyone with kids, that is a problematic ideology. When you’re secure you WANT the other parent in that kids in y’all lives. Dysfunction is believing you shouldn’t be a cordial communicating family with one another
He is a vile person. I have compassion for this young woman. She did not know what to expect. She's too young to blame her when he's 19 years older and knows better. Just because you're a Christian doesn't mean you marry just anyone. You have to pray about that and get confirmation. Based on her instability at home it sounds like she moved out of desperation. I hope she has learned and becomes stronger.❤
He took advantage hopefully she should get some money in the divorce smh
Nah. She’s knew better and then tryna use God as an excuse to do something never told her to do. She’s delusional.
@tajahmusic you are entitled to your opinion.
I still say she was a child and didn't know any better. I'd hate to know what you'd say if your child was in a similar situation at that age. You might not be so quick to agree with the law that she's an adult.
Laws set by men who legalized teenagers in order to have $exual access to them, put them to work, and send them to war.
Look into the history of why certain ages are considered legal. It's not because they are equipped. In fact they used to be even younger.
Most people think they know what they're doing at that age, but they don't. That's why healthy parents are important. I do not believe in adultifying children.
@@helena3631 full advantage. Thank you for having compassion towards her. I can't believe how people can look past a grown man using this young woman and blame her.
@@NoratheskindocExactly 💯. Especially the laws set by men to legalised teen-agers part.
How you gonna win when you ain’t right within? -Lauryn hill
I'm going to disagree. I do not feel sorry for her. She married him as she had no place to stay - she starts with this. Neither was ready for a marriage under these circumstances.
Right, thats what I wanna know. Notice she didn't talk about that. She married him for shelter despite his character. Now she's back in the same situation. So she got her results 🤷🏽♀️
Exactly!
She was desperate but I think she probably thought God was sending him to her at the right time - like not actually assessing the person but wanting to believe God sent her a husband right on time
Right!!? How was she so unprepared
Yeah, but when it's normalized and pressured onto you to be a SAHM, and not believe in yourself, it's an easy trap to fall into.
we can always count on Ms. Priscilla to bring the hot tea everytime! My fyp dont be giving me this content, so thanks for always uploading
Thank you for watching and commenting you encourage me to continue doing this ❤️❤️
I just don’t like the fact that some Christians would make mistakes and blame Christianity or God for it. Nothing good ever comes out of desperation. As a woman, make sure you have your own stuff first before you even think abt getting in a relationship. Just in case it doesn’t work out, you’d still be ok and not be homeless. I bet if she prayed abt it God would’ve said no. The same way God can send people into ur lives is the same way the enemy can as well. You need to have the discernment to tell which and what is for you, and being desperate can make you choose wrongly.
💯
At the end of it all be glad you were left with what you brought in: nothing. Believe me a man can and will leave you in a deficit!
I think they actually do their best to leave you in a deficit.
This is why you can’t marry a man for lifestyle without love. Don’t pretend you’re a Christian if you’re living with a man already when you married him for money. Lauryn hill wrote a whole song about this.
“Talking out your neck saying you’re a Christian. That was the sin that did jezebel in. Giiiiirrrls you know you better WATCH OUT. Some guys some guys are only about that thing!”
Y'all Christians love love loooove to judge each other, and it's one of my favorite things to observe from the sidelines. I especially love the part where people who judge others are usually also hypocrites living that sinful life. I love to see it. Lol.
I’m a bit confused
Sounds like she jumped into this too quickly
Also she is married so she is guaranteed some kind of protection under the law
There’s no way he can just throw her out of the martial home unless he has a court order or something
The story between them has ended as it has started…
I can't start my day without watching one of your videos
He married her for a babysitter and a bed warmer for him.
This
It's important to be able to take care of yourself whether you're a man or woman. House, car, job, etc are BASIC NECESSITIES. You shouldn't marry someone because you need a place to stay. That's very unstable. Shouldn't even be dating sweet heart.
I was raised by a single
Mom. And baby she thought to make sure to always have my own… and I thank and Bless God every day for my mom. Cause of her I refuse to allow a man to play in my face.
Something about this story isn’t adding up. Girl you picked him knowing he has a child. Some people just like to hear themselves talk I swear. Girl bye. Next!
This kind of happened to me, but I had a job with savings. He love bombed me, had a kid who I genuinely loved, wanted me to move in with him. I did and didn't have a job yet and he got sooooo abusive, trying to kick me out in freezing temps. I had a job a few months later and I never trusted him again.
Sounds like the one I was dating. “Christian man who wants a Christian wife but not willing to sit in the head of the household role”.
Single dad rushing to marry me and he couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to get married so quick. Tried to find every reason under the sun. To top it off, he wanted me to sign a prenup and I’d still be working while being a primary homemaker. I asked him what would he be helping with in the home and he just kept talking about his job.
Smart. Good thing you didn't let that dead beat trap you. 🎉
She is legally married,doesnt she have certain rights?Can he put her out,?
You cannot be excluded from the martial home unless he has a court order. Something isn’t adding up.
Right he can't just kick her out😮
That’s what I’m saying.. she didn’t have to leave cuz the cops even wouldn’t have allowed it. She doesn’t know her rights and the only reason she should’ve left was if her life was in danger.. other than that she needs to go home
Does she state her age? She must be barely in her 20s to be so naive and easily manipulated.
What this lady is saying I been through this! His whole family was against us because they thought I was there for the money! Kids were not welcoming of me. I was the “evil stepmom” label and they didn’t even know me yet lol. He begin to listen to them and short me. Older men are not dumb! Especially successful ones, they know you want money and will drain you of your youth for money
Yet conservative traditional men & women are always pushing to submit, rely & stay home & this Is what happens a lot. Husband cheats or just leaves & you’re left struggling.
He just wanted her to take care of his child
Exactly
and sex😮
The walking ahead of you thing is one of my biggest red flags. If you and your long legs wanted to walk alone you should have left me at home in peace. It’s a clear sign of how inconsiderate they are.
🤣🤣🤣🤣 @long legs 😅😅😅😅
I have noticed that all of these women make having a husband their whole personality. “My husband” this, “My husband” that. It’s cringe. It’s like they stop their whole lives for their husband. It just shows me that they have low self-esteem.
She should have never left the marital home. Plus an older man wants control and they are self serving. I tried dating a single dad twice one who was 20 years older and had grown kids but they were still living with him and another single dad my age with children under 18 who had his kids full time and he had me meet the kids fairly quickly and they started to accompany us on dates. If you are childfree don’t date men with kids. The kids will always come before you whether they are children or adults.
Older men are worse
If you choose to be a stay at home wife, make him give you a decent allowance/salary, and invest in your retirement fund. Save all that money, and let him pay for all expenses. If he can't afford it, don't quit your job, or find yourself a better provider.
My man told me he don’t want me working but I will be back to work it’s giving struggle love I’m hood off that I like having my own cause I like nice things I like to look nice he can afford a place for us to live food travel expenses but I’m high maintenance in personal needs it’s not enough money coming to keep sitting at home lmfao
He was totally just looking for someone to raise his kids. That's all. Young ladies stay away from these old roosters. I don't care how much money they have, no matter how many compliments they pay you. Stay away. They bad mouth older women because we won't put up with their mess. Please learn earlier in life to do the same. Hopefully the judge will see all that she had sacrificed and will grant her a good amount of alimony. She needs to find a women's shelter and get a case manager and an advocate. transmute those tears.
Y’all gotta quit blaming religion for your decisions. It’s really tired and lacks accountability.
I do think the the effects of religion on black people in different cultures is something that should be talked about though, and it is partly to blame because of the purity culture and fear tactics attached to said religion. That said, it is annoying when people use religion as an excuse for every bad decision they make or being an awful person.
I wouldve went back to the military ngl i would never
Here’s some REAL ADVICE for women in your 20s but you probably going to learn the hard way. Stop exchanging your time, beauty, youth and sex for money and stability with older men. They are not impressed by you, they ARE using you. I’ve been there done that! 11yrs wasted. Find someone around ur age. Yall grow together. Please stop the SAHM stuff! Keep money! What girl is saying I been hereeeeee 😫😫😫 you will come 7th place in his life. His family will be jealous of your youth and beauty. Older men are boring with decent sex. You deserve better!
Girl get off the internet crying over this man and give thanks to God you don’t have to deal with him anymore ✌🏾
Reasons not to date men with kids if you don't have kids 1. The fact that he is not with the childs mother is a huge red flag. Most times the childs mother is not with him for a reason. 2. You will never ever be a priority. You will always be put last even after the baby mama. 3. Most times these men are broke or at the very least they are paying for another womans household taking money from your lifestyle. 4. Kids can be very disrespectful and he will likely take kids and baby mamas side. 5. Him sleeping with baby mama is extremely common and they will both laugh at you because baby mama is still getting paid and using him how she wants. Just dont devalue yourself unless you are ok with constant disrespect and being a free maid or nanny.
Maybe she should RUN
Sounds like he's overcompensating for the Mom & too stupid to realize it. Mom popping in whenever she likes is unacceptable
This woman was lazy.
Not to mention what kind of son that man is raising by making him the center of his world and showing this child how to dispose of women so easily. Sad.
He can’t just kick her out depending on the state. But there were SO many signs that he was never about her just from that first clip. Sad she didn’t see the red flags.
She saw them but talked herself out of them
Great advice as always!!
Glad it was helpful! 🙏🏾
So she wasn’t okay with shacking up because she’s a “Christian” but she was perfectly fine with dating and marrying a never-married single father in 4 months? What happened to folks taking their Ls in PEACE? 😂😅 Odd behavior. SMH
Religion is not en excuse to rush into a relationship let alone a marriage, you have to have discernment, the Bible say test the spirit, if she would’ve taken her time getting to know him she would’ve not ended up in that situation.
💯💯
You never choose a man or to move to the next step when you’re in a state of desperation. Having nowhere to live is NOT a reason to marry and move in with someone…. What?!?
I hate seeing her on the internet crying giving him the satisfaction he wants. Pick your head up baby and get your shit together. Praise GOD you don’t have a child by him. Get a divorce and get YOURS. You’ll be okay. ❤❤❤
A parent will always choose their child over a romantic partner
Edit: a good parent will, every parent should
Because romantic partners come and go. You have no obligation to them. You do however have an obligation to the ones that came out of you. As they are of your flesh and blood and they depend on you from birth until they are grown and self sufficient. To put anyone (that isn’t God) above/before them is 1) disgusting, 2) disrespectful to your children who look at you as a role model and teacher, 3) just all around giving deadbeatism.
@@TheRealDeal130 And most fathers leave their wives with kids to find a 'romantic partner' to breed, only to repeat the same cycle with another woman.
@@alanaatkinson551 BOTH genders are wrong for that. Leave the oppression and struggle politics at the door.😒
@@chocolatebunny3221 As if I was invalidating what op said, just wanted to make an addition to what was said.
A crazy parent will convince themselves that they are being given an ultimatum, when someone asks for inclusion.
god not a fan of shacking up...but he is a fan of "single" fathers...uhhm ok
She was homeless before him and she’s homeless after him. This is her fault. No one else’s. Why wouldn’t she stack her money when she was living with him? Tf?
Thats why you always have your own. You cant depend on anybody but yourself.🤷♀️
I agree💯
You are a very wise lady. Speak that truth!
No financial stability before moving in... I wouldn't recommend it
Idk why they could have dated, and lived apart separately, and stayed celibate, then she would have seen through his bs before marrying him.
She had nowhere to live. She basically married out of religious ignorance, pressure, and desperation.
It happens to many.
He married a woman for his kid, not a wife.
That girl needs to run! Get a divorce. I been there, I can relate. I did that for seven years. Do not be me. It's not gonna get better. Run girl. Run.
I hope she gets back on track fast and trouble-free.
I bet she helped take care of his kids too. Being a step mother sucks….very unforgiving and usually the kids do not respect you at all!
Territorial? She's possessive, and she probably was fighting for his attention and time. You signed up to be a mom, and she wasn't ready. She wanted a boyfriend, not a husband.
Baby God is providing for u ..... be grateful u r soooo young so beautiful, u got no kids ❤️
What her wasband was doing was triangulation. It kept her in a state of competition and anxiety. He's prolly a covert narcissist. THEY ARE THE WORSE!
Why did she leave her house? Girl, go to court.
Thank you for this video!❤
Yep, always have your own money!! Make him pay the bills but have your own income just for you and your children!
So, she wasn't against being there with him and his child but he never appreciated her for it. Couldn't even take her out on a date, show his love for her, etc. I mean she said he would literally walk ahead of her and his child when they were out and about. That just tell me he doesn't want to be seen with her. Just sad.
This man just wanted you forthe nookie. He did not put you first and once you were a burden. In any way, he let you go.
Everything would be perfectly fine my now ex husband would literally kiss my cheek or forehead leaving for work (hella early in the morning so I'd be sleeping but light sleeper so I'd immediately wakeup) & would then ghost me for days - MONTHS... The smear campaign was unfuxxing real...
Telling everybody the wildest fights happening & everyone believed it... Because of my supposed attitude & who in their right mind would just abruptly ignore & disappear randomly hiding from their wife... Their PREGNANT WIFE with 2 other toddlers (all 3 children are his btw)
??? I must be lying!
& then I'd be pressured (to put it nicely) in to forgiving him & taking him back because ultimately it was my shortcomings as a wife AND the Bible says blah blah blah
I want to share more but I'd be sitting here for days.
I'm still waiting on the revelation of those "NOT" males... Where are they? Since XYs always want to target & attack my comments
It's normal to chose your kids other a stranger.
This woman doesn't sound like she wants to ever be a parent. She sounds like she would be the type of jealous mother, even if she gave birth to her own children. She should STAY child free.
Why do you think he wanted to marry you. Power play. POWER PLAY.
Most men don’t even want to be married the fact that this man wanted to get married so fast is a red flag
@@helena3631 Right?? A means to an end. Romance is romance. Reality?? A lil different.
Her ex-husband never loved her. He did not have any interest in getting to know her and appreciating her for the woman she is. He used her naivete and religious beliefs against her. I think religion does a huge disservice to most women.
When she first talk about a dude with his kids full time and the Church way...i knew it was a red🚩🚩🚨🚨 flag .
If you see a man walking ahead of a woman and they almost look like they arnt together, that man is more than likely a narcissist. When i was with my fiance he would walk ahead on purpose and when i was pregnant i pulled him on it and he said i walked to slow. This man would speed his walk up, when i caught up 😂
I had no self worth to put up with that for as long as i did! Be alone for a few years and stay celebate! Older men are great at manipulation, be careful
Naw, she was homeless & forced that relationship to have someone take care of her & her family and he was irritated by her. SHE DIDN'T KNOW HIM. Most men do not want to take care of everything & christianity & being naive will get these young girls caught up. And these old men are manipulative & angry. Im not sure what shes crying about. She need to count her blessings. She need to get herself together not worry about her family who cleary didnt set her up well for adulthood.
At the risk of sounding apathetic, it’s 2024 not 1824… How are women still getting roped into situations like this?
Sure a lot of these dudes are awful, but also, like on the barest of minimums, why are women STILL not making sure they have a security blanket and put they’re whole lives in a man’s hands off “love.” Money, like love, can run out.