what Tiktok recommends a brand new user
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 18 พ.ย. 2021
- Here's a discount link where you can get 50% off your first Bright Cellars 6-bottle box: brightcellars.com/dylan50
Today we explore what tiktok recommends to a brand new account. I knew there was a reason I don't use the app...
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Dylan is giving: "My child better be funny because I'm not spending 18 years fake laughing in my own house."
i took a rhetoric class last year and the first day of class my professor had us take 10 minutes to think about it and then go around and share our greatest fear with the class to show us public speaking wasn't so bad or something. Most of us took it super seriously and shared like "im afraid that when i die ill find out all my beliefs are wrong," and "i'm afraid of being alone forever," and broke down in tears and stuff, and then one girl goes "my greatest fear is my kids wont be funny." The professor made fun of her the rest of the year lol (All in good fun btw, she was a great professor and one of my mentors now, and the girl knew it)
Dylan’s future child’s life is a whole villain origin story
We are witnessing younger Endeavor
Maybe that child will finish the book Dylan started lmao
Lmao
@@elisabetstar125 oh no the child's eye 👀
It all began when i didn't have the proper motor skills....
Dylan: I’ll never have children
Also Dylan: my child’s gonna be better than yours
"Happy little accidents" I guess
Such a parent already😅😅
The longer you're on tiktok, the funnier even the stupid stuff seems. At a certain point you just start laughing at everything.
Omg true!
Dylan made me feel bad about laughing to tears on sum of these while he stares disappointedly 😭
@@user-pt5cl2ro6f Dylan wears a fake nose ring, don't let him make you feel bad
@@thefreckledevil6090 lmao
@@thefreckledevil6090 now that's just mean 😭😭
this video is just dylan talking about how he wants kids but also doesn't want kids, and if he would they would be either rly spoiled or the complete opposite
😂😂
Tbh as a fellow 30yo (which I get the vibe he’s around the same age- haven’t watched the video yet) it’s a conundrum. Like the clock’s ticking but damn do I love my alone time and extra spending money and low amount of responsibilities (also I’m single as hell but that’s besides the point)
@@shannonceleste5557 as another 30yo, hard same! Like my dog is enough at this point 😅
@@shannonceleste5557 Well that explains things, Dylan just recently turned 30yo and he loves pointing it out every other video if you stick long enough (theres a video about it too lo)
@@shannonceleste5557 lmao same, when he said he didn’t have kids bc he can’t find someone to have his kids. For a sec I wanted to be like “🙋🏻♀️ I volunteer as tribute” but I don’t want kids so I was like “yeah that’s a hard pass 🤣 “
dylan: “children content is not scripted”
ace family: exists
Fishfam family: exacts
Labrant fam
Who are these families????
@@alejandraleon3593 people who use their kids for views and money
😭
Dylan giggling at his own jokes is the best part of his videos.
Facts
Tik tok is like visiting a playground. You have a bunch of crazy kids, a bunch of teens who think theyr so cool, and a couple of creepy adults.
I don’t even use tiktok but you’re so right
why is this so accurate
Your Tiktok is weird.
This is so correct that I can’t believe I’ve never seen this way
I’m not sure if you use TikTok that often if you think there are only a couple of creepy adults
He’s totally going to get sucked into Tiktok once the algorithm figures him out... cause that’s what happened to me
Sameeee
me too 😭
Same
The algorithm still didn't figure me out...
Saaame. My little sisters convinced me to try it and I went in fully expecting to hate everything I saw. Which I did, for a while. But now here I am, a year later, with a fyp full of books and science and feminism and sewing and weird animals. Mainly I just love how tiktok is the only social media that makes me feel happy, since all other social media just constantly show me things that make me angry and sad. All hail the magic algorithm!
dylan: “this is why i don’t wanna have children”
*10 seconds later*
dylan: “my child-“
I can see him bringing his child to daycare saying "my child is better than yours"
Tik Tok has some great creators. The people who comment though, are 90% horrible. I was recommended mostly dancing girls in yoga pants when I first used it, but it it learns quite well. Now it's all bakes and cakes.
I agree. I try not to read the comments it really brings the vibe down.
Tell me about it. Just saw a tik tok recently of a girl in a mental health ward of hospital saying that two doctors laughed at her appearance. And I check the comments hoping to find support and can only find nasty.
So you went from cakes to cakes?
@@Lake420H Ikr! I always go in the comments hoping to see some inspiring first-hand experiences or support, but I'm always bummed with the negativity.
@@Myseena55 LOL
Dylan: no one wants to have kids with me
Also dylan: I’m going to put my kids in a bunker
Quality father material
"Children crying, love to see it" you couldn't have explained me better, Dylan😆
ahhhhhh!! made it 1k im stoked
Should I be happy or sad that I’m not Dylan’s child? I would have a dad with a great sense of humour but I’d basically be trained from birth to wear only Gucci and make potentially controversial jokes
I see it as a win
Why should you give a shit about if a joke is controversial because it’s a JOKE
@@LowYummy cuz you shouldnt joke about too serious stuff (especially if you hurt others)
True tae
@@LowYummy Are you Dylan's secret kid he's been hiding from us-
Dylan is, in many ways, like wine himself.
For example, with every day he too becomes finer.
Dam u slick af
Indeed.
that was too smooth
Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh 🔥
I’m sorry but the “help” from that child was hilarious 🤣
I have to agree 🤣
I don't think he realized that the kid just ate wasabi and their mouth was on fire
I laughed so hard and long I almost threw up. This kid was the funniest thing I've seen in month.
@@idkjustk1 yeah that’s not okay. Poor baby, irresponsible parent.
For those confused about the last one: The baby says, "Help", because her mom just fed her _wasabi_ and it's burning her mouth.
Bruh
Oooh the moms a total as whole !!
Some people shouldn't have kids
That mother is evil (who monetizes their own child's suffering that they caused on purpose?????)
Ohhhhhh I had no idea. That’s terrible. I had a coworker prank me with hot sauce one time. It was so bad that I, a grown woman, started crying and almost threw up. I watched her give the same hot sauce to her TODDLER. He started screaming and sobbing and I watched her clamp a hand over his mouth and take him out back because the customers were starting to wonder what in tf. Some people absolutely should not have children.
Dylan: I can't find anyone who would wanna have kids with me
His Fans: I'm not even here, I' m a hallucination
Ooga Booga is stealing all the late night dylan budget as it should
Nobody:
Dylan: "I think I can fight a lot of children, all at once... Most kids go down with one swing" 😂 🤣😂
Alternate title: "Dylan making bad parenting decisions for 14 minutes straight"
i like how dylan hates children and loves them at the same time😝
Dylan doesn't like kids because he knows he has the mind of one
“Can’t find someone to have them with me” Dylan have you read your comments sometimes?
literally what I was thinking like? does he really want us to simp even more???
Ikr
exactly! like I'm volunteering!!
I literally said “I volunteer” out loud and my roommate looked at me like I was crazy 😂
@@cortnie222 same lol
As someone who listens to death metal, that girl could really go somewhere.
Dylan's kid will be one of a kind.
Like father like offspring
I love Dylan, but seeing his pained and liveless expression when he realised his phone stopped screen recording gives me so much joy 🤣
Thank you for including it
Dylan wanting to shelter his kids - not for their safety - but so they don’t learn Internet phrases and use them in real life is a MOOD I did not know I was feeling. I support the reasoning … not the action.
Edit: glad you didn’t scrap the video! Thanks for the extra effort!
He has a secret love child hidden somewhere and is slowly readying us for his presence
Dylan’s 3 reasons for having children: War buffers, X-Men team, Content
dylan is secretly a tiktok stan
Totally agree 💕
Why did TH-cam offer to translate this? 😂
Love your piccc😍😍😍
I feel like he is intentionally avoiding tiktok because he knows he will be addicted like the rest of us :) .
That's why avoid it tbh. Also I can totally see Dylan unofficially making YT shorts/tiktoks
Dylan : I know you might not be able to recognize me without my...
Me : nose ring ?
Dylan : ...my Gucci necklace
*Yelling in misdirect*
i said glasses 😞
I laughed at one tik tok he watched and I laughed so much at all the child jokes. It’s amazing how Dylan is exactly my tipe of humour. Also, as an old subscriber of Dylan I have to say the Gucci necklace is not as iconic as the old keys one.
Agreed! I miss the key necklace.
Did he lose that one in the robbery?
Dylan do be having a secret Identity when his nose ring is off
When Dylan said "This is Ooga Boog. If you can't tell when I am joking and when I am not joking, the you shouldn't be here." I was like 'exactly.'
Some people just don't get his humor and really think he really means it when he says that he will beat up children like 💀??
This man cracks me up all the time ✋🏻💕
This should be named “if i ever have a kid”
Whoever has Dylan’s babies you are the luckiest person in the world but also you got a big task ahead of you
The dog sandwich one would have worked much better if she was putting the dog in hotdog bread.
Also
"I am not on Tiktok... I don't feel safe there" I feel that to my core
That baby said “help.” 😂 And I damn-near passed out.
Wow I almost didn’t recognize Dylan because of his Gucci necklace :O
Dylan: I'm gonna shelter my kids..imma put them in a bunker until they're 18!
Aso Dylan: ... that sounds..that sounds bad... it sounds like im just about to start a cult and put my kids in a cellar..
Also Dylan again: I MIGHT
“Am I really Dylan if I don’t have my gucci necklace?”
Yes Dylan, because we all know you as the youtuber with a gucci necklace and not as the tall pale bamboo stick who makes bad sex jokes
literally dylan every 30 seconds : that sounded wrong i shouldn't have said that
Dylan you are not alone in not having a tiktok. Thought I was the only one 😂
I don't want to get a TikTok of I can help it. I only have this, and Facebook. No Twitter or Instagram. I have an old Snapchat I haven't used in a super long time. I might get Instagram once I can start up things I want to do for promotional purposes.
@@minnamendez3927 I basically only use yt these days. Have a fb, ig and Snapchat but haven’t posted on them in at least 2+ years each. Mostly still have them to keep up with people who don’t live close/family out of state.
Me neither!! ✊
Meanwhile my cat is friendly and cuddley to the point where the minibus that picks me up every other day gets concerned if she doesn't walk me to the bus or if she isn't waiting for me when i get back home since she loves people. Like i was once running late and just glanced out the window to see the driver out of his bus, on the griund just petting my cat
I mean all cats are friendly! People who say cats are mean just don't respect the cat's boundaries.. I mean if it's obviously annoyed and you keep pushing and they scratch you, don't go crying that the cat is mean.
All cats I have had and met are 100% floofy cuties
Ooga Booga has some of that Late Night Dylan budget today
wow im early, well hello dylan
Dylan really flexed about how he could beat and win a fight with literal children 😂
I remember the first time I got on TikTok (I was pretty late compared to others) and I was so disturbed, I contemplated deleting it after being 5 minutes in 😃
4:22 I was fully prepared for a second ad plug
Been struggling with telling you this… but there’s a girl in Denmark who’s dealing with severe depression and your videos helped put a smile on her face. Thanks for making my days seem a little brighter, thank you Dylan 💜
YAYYYYYY ANOTHER DYLAN VIDEO, I'M SO HAPPY 🥺 Also, TikTok is banned in my country, so I don't even know what it's like 😂😂
lol same
You can watch some tiktok compilations on TH-cam and Instagram has a lot of tiktok content now so I wouldnt say you're missing anything.
I feel like this the beginning of dylans spiral into tiktok obsession
I'm here for it
@@BriEva13 so am I lol
just saying, a lot of those phrases don't just originate on the internet. It's very often just phrases from queer people- specifically black American queer people.
Yeah, it's AAVE that was colonized and became overused by non black people.
@@maskedsinger8337 yeah which is why it gets on my nerves when ppl make fun of it, like pls educate yourself on where it originates
Who cares, all those phrases are cringy asf
@@TheStepmonkey Um honey, those phrases originated from AAVE. They're cringey when used by dumb non-black teenagers but saying those phrases are just cringe in general is ignorant at best and racist at worst. Watch what u say
@@buhlenkuna8307 !!!!!!
dylan at 2:21 looks like my mother when i show her a meme
OMG DYLAN ON A FRIDAY?! BEST COMBO 👌🏼
I was laughing out loud at the drummer one! This is the quality content I needed on a Friday. A sincere thanks, Dylan
When I’m sad I always go on your channel and watch your videos because they just make me so fucking happy
The baby: … help
Me: *rolling on the floor*
Dylan: *unamused*
Me: DYLAN THIS IS PEAK COMEDY
you’re right dylan, our children will have finely tuned motor skills straight out of my womb
Drunk dylan on a Friday? Even better
"this is why I dont have kids...I can't find someone who wants to have them with me"
I mean... I'll take one for the team -- 😆🤷♀
i was not prepared for that cut to dylan with glasses and warm lighting- 10/10
love how he changes up the intros vocally every time lol
Dylan: I don't feel safe on ✨tikcock ✨
Neither do we, dylan, neither do we...
been laughing at the fact that dylan uses yahoo and looks at his YAHOO NEWS FEED for a minute straight now
2:38 SINGLE PEOPLE ASSEMBLE😂😅 *cries tears of singleness in the corner*
I love how Dylan is so into the dogs cheating😂
4:26 "it sounds like I'm gonna lock them in a cellar...
A bright cellar...
Speaking of bright cellars..
Thank you to bright cellars for sponsoring this episode. You can get $20 off your first order by..."
Oh i needed this so bad, thank you for bringing the light!!!
And stop pretending you don't like tiktok. We need YOUR account there..
I've been feeling pretty bad today and this video made my day so much better. Thanks for making me smile today :)
We are all waiting on a Collab with Hannah Bayles she loves your videos and keeps saying she would love to Collab with you. Her content is great she reviews tv and movies from a vocal teacher perspective. Her channel is your voice teacher.
12:57 lol I thought Dylan's gonna do a 10-years-later version of himself
Like a post credit scene ya know?
Thank you so much for posting Dylan. I was having a really bad day and was like “hmm maybe Dylan has a video” and you did and it made my day. Thank you bunches
Dylan's glasses suit him so well
I was looking for this comment 😆
Dylan went from being a daddy to a dad lmao
Therapy ❌
Dylan dunking on kids ✅
I love you, Dylan!! Thanks so much for the extra effort, you always brighten my day with your satirical humour and your nose ring 🥺 bet that’s more attention than you’ve had from a woman in a while huh
I saw scarlet witch in the thumbnail omg let's gooooo
dylan: “that kid’s gonna be a menace”
also dylan: “i can fight a lot of kids” 😭
Dylan "angrily googling how to fix screen record error" face is the cutest 😭
PLEASE do more of you drinking and actually watching something enjoyable, it’s nice to see you laugh genuinely 😭
Not gonna lie dylan this video is the best I was literally laughing so much that I started crying of laughter I am going to watch this again and again now .
When you take Dylan’s comments as a continued conversation instead of one offs, it because much more entertaining … and telling.
Where the hell did that tennis ball come from, Dylan? 🤣🤣
Dylan, I started in the same place as you. I avoided TikTok like the plague it is. And then I got it because I wanted to watch one video from one creator that I followed on a different platform, and now it’s got me and it won’t let me go
“If my kids don’t entertain me, then they get no love”
*the ace family entered the chat*
You should see my reccomendations as someone without an account when I get sent a tiktok video. It's actually really gross so I'm hyped to see this
I absolutely, positively, LOVE Dylan in glasses.
Thanks for not abandoning the video despite the technical difficulties! It was worth it!
Thank you for the extra effort❤ I'm just sending love, because I really needed a laugh today ❤❤❤ thanks again
dylan "my child-" me: "our child."
Dylan's intros get exponentially better each time
Dylan yelling: AGHHH CHILDREN YES!
👀👀👀👀👀
Hell yeah thank you Dylan you have made my whole day 😊💖
dylan's kids in the future watching this from the bunker: 👁👅👁
Dylan: i have a virtually unused account
also Dylan: looks suspiciously to his left
I think it was really worth it to put the extra effort in. It was actually really funny! I don't think i laugh as much to any other content than i laugh to yours
I LOVE YOU DYLAN THANK YOU FOR MAKING US LAUGH