Facts!! I’m not saying I’m better than you Mom, Dad… I’m simply saying let’s become better. I’m picking up adulting skills throughout life and you stopped updating yours, let’s win together instead of off each other.
I am currently reading Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson. I definitely recommend it for people who are ready to give up on relationships with parents who are self absorbed and emotionally stunted.
As a therapist I appreciated your perspective and will be sharing this show. I also really want to shout from the rooftops- Meet me at my EMOTION!!! That is literally the 🔑 that I give parents all the time. Meet me at my emotion!!
I’m a parent of 4 and I had rejection from my father and neglect from my mother. I started to behave like my mother when it came to yelling instead of speaking to my children and realized that I’m doing to them what I hated being done to me! I had to stop!!!!!
Im just curious but at what point in THEIR lives did you realize you were doing that and needed to stop? AND how hard was it for you to correct those traits you picked up from your mother?
@@Mynameistyshawn thankfully early in their lives! My children are still young all under 18. I seeked out counseling to help with the trauma of the traits from my mom: it helped!
Wow! I can relate! The hardest thing is when I realize that I’m doing the same exact thing, it makes me so sad after the fact that I then go and apologize, but I also don’t want to keep repeating the same thing over and over. I have to seek a therapist because I can’t be better for my kids, if I haven’t gotten to the root cause and heal from childhood trauma!
This is so interesting. You all are so hard on yourselves for backsliding into bad habits. Your kids will be alright and they will understand. What they won’t tolerate is you backsliding into the scapegoat-edness of your ‘family of origin’ dynamic. You can have a whole-ass conversation with your children when you misstep in parenting; but they can’t protect you when the mistreatment you experienced as children that perpetrates itself into your adulthood, and subsequently their adulthood…the look on your children’s faces will destroy you. The recognition and realization of said harm is unmistakable. And it does NOT look anything like you having a parenting mishap. My kids are 20 and almost 13, and the looks on their faces when a relative behaves like this. I can’t describe the feeling. We don’t need white people to send us to the sunken place because they’ve invested so much in harm, we’ll do it to one another.
This episode was my mother daughter experience broken into segments. I appreciate your candor and ability to articulate the difficulties of navigating these sensitive subjects. You dropped so many gems I will have to watch this one a few times! 💎💎💎
This episode was just everything! The mothers raising their daughters and loving their sons- isn’t that the truth!!! 👏🏾 👏🏾 👏🏾 Oh and the Caribbean parent.🙋🏾♀️ I feel seen!
Amanda I literally am tearing up at work listening to this episode. I’m 30 and also an only child to a single mother. I’m in this phase right now and it’s so uncomfortable. Thank you for these gems; This was something I needed to hear in this moment.❤
Enjoying this share, Amanda, as a parent. A thought around "student becomes the teacher"... this is when a parent can feel fulfilled and rewarded vs useless. As my daughter passed 18 and now approaching 30 I am grateful that traditional mothering is no longer needed. Now, simply sharing ancient wisdom that women shared within villages, irrespective of age. Less about guidance and more about exploring questions, the "right" questions together. 💞 Enjoying observing my daughter with unconditional love, and what we can learn together.
The real mind fuck is as a parent of an adult son and realizing this grown man no longer NEEDS you outside your sweet potato pie, macaroni and cheese, and my special pancakes. When he left to return overseas I cried harder then I did when he left for college. I had mourn what our relationship use to be and celebrate the friendship that survived it.
The love of a mother and her son is something I can never wrap my head around. I mean, I am her daughter and was raised independent. My brother on the other hand was a bit spoiled and not so independent. This might be more prevalent in the black community but this is how I feel and it feels horrible at times to see my mom still support my brother 80 percent of the time while I'm being 100 percent my own support.....But like the podcast said, Parents are just people!!!!
21:57 The way my adult brother will still cuddle with my mom and yet my relationship with my mom always has me doing mini calculations to figure out how to avoid setting off conflict. I can't imagine what it would be like to feel safe in the relationship like he does.
I know for me it has been a conscious effort in ensuring that I didn’t apply ALL things that my parents applied to raising me. For me it was about realizing that some of the ways that did more harm then good in my childhood I didn’t want to apply to my kids. It has been conscious.
I'm a woman and have a twin brother. There was definitely different expectations for each of us. He went to summer school several times and I didn't. But I also knew going to summer school wasn't an option for me...not that I wanted to go. lol I was deemed the responsible one. I had to behave, look, move a certain way that is deemed respectable. I was held accountable for my actions. Mistakes weren't allowed and when mistakes happened it was as if it was the most horrific thing. When I became an adult, I was considered too independent and trying to prove a point. Neither was true. I made sure I handled my business. But when either of my parents need something, they call me! 😁 The expectations are certainly different for daughters vs sons. I do wish I experienced more softness while being raised. The abruptness, the toughness was too much. Because now we have to work through balancing and showing our femininity.
This episode is excellent! I have already listen more that three (3) times and I will probably do it again. Thank you for the work and love you put in our community❤❤❤
Why is there jealousy between a parent and an adult child when they grow up as a better parent, better wife, better person, or just better overall? You would think they’d be happy since a parent’s goal is to prepare their children to survive in this world.
I FULLY RELATE TO THIS ENTIRE EPISODE. If I didn’t watch this, this probably would’ve taken me a lifetime to figure out this portion of my life. THANK YOU GIRL. BARZZZzz on barz.
Dear Amanda, This is honestly my first full TH-cam episode of yours I have watched all the way and I just watched it this morning. Thank You Amanda! I subscribed and saved this episode and even screen recorded lol so I have it to share and remind myself Around 45 minute that really my purpose and reasons are Still for Positivity, Saving, Moving With Positive Purpose (Everything inside of me is processing, remembering, that the intention behind actions and purpose is Be Love Active, Be And Give Grace, Annie) God Is So Good! 🌄💚🕊️
You definitely touched a soft spot for me with this one, definitely pulled on my heartstrings. I am literally having struggles with my parent right now as an adult. It made me compassionate and made me question my anger. The end was a little scary because the thought of dissolving a relationship with my parent no matter how difficult that relationship may be is so hard for me to do. I love my mom but GOSSSSH WOW love her but WTF ! Damn it I need therapy.
I believe mothers love their sons and raise their daughters because the father is supposed to raise the son and love the daughter, so that’s why it’s important to have both parents in your life because each parent, plays a different part in the rearing of the child
Though that is a great perspective, raising your daughters should never be void of love compassion grace and or empathy; In fact, more should have been given since mothers should have been able to relate to at least some aspects of that child.
My Mom was like Tokyo Toni but treated my brothers with such gentile love & caring. I had to get away from them because I knew I couldn’t heal in that toxic environment. It was so crazy that my friends would come over and ask why is she acting like that and treating me the way she did. I had to go to therapy to let that trauma go but I still have my days when I get angry thinking about all the traumatic experiences with her.
17:28 jumping back in. I knew I was going make huge mistakes as a parent. But I will say it was an interesting when my son talks about events I had no clue or he has a memory of me having locs at my wedding 20 years ago. Even though there are wedding pictures throughout the house. 😂
20:40 went through this exact process and it's so true. You really analyze your parents traumas and it correlates to everything you experienced! But I'm also the son of Jamaican parents and born and raised in NY/NJ so, the disrespect and stoicism from our parents generation was damn near slavery😂😂 🤷🏾♂️ #firstgen
Wow. I’m 27. And legit facing this exact same issue.. only child.. single mom.. same sign three days /30 years apart and IM trying I can’t tell if she is anymore
When parents don't want to be accountable and responsible for damages they caused, while they keep doing the damaging and extends no grace to their own children...nope that's more than wrong of them. Too, when they become grandparents they even become even more over the top with having such expectations of their children. These unhealthy dynamics are taxing, unfair. No parent, no person has no Earthly right to impose that upon others.
I have 2 daughters ages 25 and 26 who all of a sudden stopped speaking with me. I was devastated because after their dad left, I swear I did everything for them. I lost weight, and had a mild heart attack and I didn't even know why. This generation is so different than mine. I'm 56. I received a letter from my youngest and she said I had Narcissist Personality Disorder. I have Lupus, Fibromyalgia, and Osteoarthritis. I was renting a home and both daughters moved out. I am on SSDI and I did ask them to help. I used to drive semi-trucks but my body just can't handle it anymore. I sent them to college, paid for it, and did everything I could for them. I became homeless living in my vehicle me and my Pomeranian and when I asked both of them if I could stay with them and pay them I was told no by both and my oldest told me, I'll give you some Xtra blankets. I live in Flint, MI and it gets cold! Anyway, I've tried to get them to talk with me but since they won't, I am just concentrating on myself. I do know that we all reap what we sow!
It sounds like you don't have any idea why they would reject you like this. You know the children you raised and should ask yourself what could be the reasons. I can't bet you the car you're living in that they didn't help you because they feel that you are taking without any interest in giving what they feel was neglected. You ended this comment with "you reap what you sow" and I don't know if you are reflecting that to them or realize that that applies to you too.
💯to so many things you said. I think it''s also a boomer thing, my mom does so many of these things, there's such a lack of emotion and stoicism from that generation, so the traumas, emotions, growth, etc can't be discussed bc of that lack of emotional coping skills, and my mom is a therapist LOL. The past is too deep to deal w, and bring it up even when you're working on growth, healthy coping skills, including healthy boundaries, on your own, not trying to put them down for the shit you unfortunately were exposed to. I respect and love my mom 100 for her tenacity and reliabilty in my life, and many other things. Despite always being 'wrong' w everything I say, as a 45 year old 2 degree holding woman, and my sister being the 'son', the favored one. I can see it all in the macro lense, the emotional traumas are so hard to deal w when they can't meet you somewhere, I just accept where I can get, and try and put the boundaries where I can. And try to give grace as much as I can., but it's hard. Still have work to do on myself. Thanks for sharing this, makes one feel less alone in dealing w these complexities🙌
Stopping by to get this over 200 just came from Instagram. It's past midnight overseas I gotta go to sleep 😅Been binging Amanda content tonight lol,Revolt interview, Instagram, now I am back here🤪.
Did I miss where you talked about your part in how it was that way? I heard about the secual exploration that I hope is part of everyone's life. What part is pride playing in your side of things. Since we are all someone's children, it is easy to identify our parent's point(s) of pride. I know you do your work, and it's not our business, do you know your part? Thanks for the great buffet. I am in the AmandaVerse, so I am hopping over there now.
My mom tries to prove her trauma was worse than mine!? And I honestly feel she avoided getting to know me and just moved on with her next kids. Now I avoid her
I just don’t think you understand what it is to be a parent until you become one. Once your adult children become parents many of the things they judged you for they come to understand about you.
What happens when they end up changing later and loving thr daughters and realizing that they never raised thr sons? This gets highlighted a lot when they realize the son never had goals, and or amounts to nothing.
Let me know when you find one, because this is SO HARD! I am almost terrified of my kids getting older and not like me as a person! Big difference between being the“parent” and being a “person” that the child grows into an adult and actually like as an individual..
This is very interesting because someone from the industry via probably some church and the shade room and jason lee hollywood unlocked i guess, has been taking (also Hi Trevor Noah) sound bites and "Gem Drops" from my computer, phones, and even my classroom. And I do remember precisely because this a 'gem drop' that I tell my students not as an excuse for their parents but so that they can be strong alongside their parent, it is exactly that Amanda "one thing I remind students of now is that their parents are just people, at the end of the day we have to remember that, so that we have empathy for them as parents." The rest of this video is seemingly also shaped around some man's church assumption about how Women need to act and how Women raise their daughters, and how sex isn't the thing, because apparently I'm a ho, which is also WRONG. I am not. But the same men would also like for that to be true, is that not correct. So, I hope that it isn't the same people and group giving themselves excuses that they are allowed to report by the law on whatever it is they want. OKAY LIARS. That's what you're reporting, and that's what you lyfe is. Good job. I love your show and things. Thank you.
Facts!! I’m not saying I’m better than you Mom, Dad… I’m simply saying let’s become better. I’m picking up adulting skills throughout life and you stopped updating yours, let’s win together instead of off each other.
I am currently reading Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson. I definitely recommend it for people who are ready to give up on relationships with parents who are self absorbed and emotionally stunted.
I have to buy it today smh
It's a doozie 😬
Thanks bcuz I definitely checked out.
I have this book & yup, a necessary purchase
_My mother’s therapist told me to get this_ *sigh*
I swear...I don't understand why/how people can't see what a gem Ms. Amanda Seales is. #ProtectAmandaSeales
As a therapist I appreciated your perspective and will be sharing this show. I also really want to shout from the rooftops- Meet me at my EMOTION!!! That is literally the 🔑 that I give parents all the time. Meet me at my emotion!!
I’m a parent of 4 and I had rejection from my father and neglect from my mother. I started to behave like my mother when it came to yelling instead of speaking to my children and realized that I’m doing to them what I hated being done to me! I had to stop!!!!!
Im just curious but at what point in THEIR lives did you realize you were doing that and needed to stop? AND how hard was it for you to correct those traits you picked up from your mother?
@@Mynameistyshawn thankfully early in their lives! My children are still young all under 18. I seeked out counseling to help with the trauma of the traits from my mom: it helped!
@@DivaSaiV321 that’s great! I’m sure they notice the change and will appreciate it if not now definitely in the future! Great job Mom!! 👏🏾👏🏾
Wow! I can relate! The hardest thing is when I realize that I’m doing the same exact thing, it makes me so sad after the fact that I then go and apologize, but I also don’t want to keep repeating the same thing over and over.
I have to seek a therapist because I can’t be better for my kids, if I haven’t gotten to the root cause and heal from childhood trauma!
This is so interesting. You all are so hard on yourselves for backsliding into bad habits. Your kids will be alright and they will understand. What they won’t tolerate is you backsliding into the scapegoat-edness of your ‘family of origin’ dynamic. You can have a whole-ass conversation with your children when you misstep in parenting; but they can’t protect you when the mistreatment you experienced as children that perpetrates itself into your adulthood, and subsequently their adulthood…the look on your children’s faces will destroy you. The recognition and realization of said harm is unmistakable. And it does NOT look anything like you having a parenting mishap. My kids are 20 and almost 13, and the looks on their faces when a relative behaves like this. I can’t describe the feeling. We don’t need white people to send us to the sunken place because they’ve invested so much in harm, we’ll do it to one another.
When you said dealing with a difficult parent while raising your child I almost broke down crying. Dealing with that now and it’s so tough
This episode was my mother daughter experience broken into segments. I appreciate your candor and ability to articulate the difficulties of navigating these sensitive subjects. You dropped so many gems I will have to watch this one a few times! 💎💎💎
“Now if you’re an immigrant kid, then I don’t know what to tell you” FACTS!! BIG FACTS 😂😂😂😂 (I laugh to stop myself from crying 😅)
I am a Caribbean American child and I'm crying while watching this.
Same!! Cause, Lawd have mercy!
@@cherylmartinez3306🙌🏾🥲😞
This episode was just everything! The mothers raising their daughters and loving their sons- isn’t that the truth!!! 👏🏾 👏🏾 👏🏾 Oh and the Caribbean parent.🙋🏾♀️ I feel seen!
Thank you for this episode girl!! Needed to feel like I wasn’t the only one feeling this way 🫶🏽
Amanda I literally am tearing up at work listening to this episode. I’m 30 and also an only child to a single mother. I’m in this phase right now and it’s so uncomfortable.
Thank you for these gems; This was something I needed to hear in this moment.❤
You got this queen. The universe is on your side!
@@cherylmartinez3306 Thank you so much for this sis ✨❤️🥺
Parents are people, period. When that is realized - when empathy is exercised - a new clarity (a deeper understanding) emerges.
Agreed
Enjoying this share, Amanda, as a parent. A thought around "student becomes the teacher"... this is when a parent can feel fulfilled and rewarded vs useless. As my daughter passed 18 and now approaching 30 I am grateful that traditional mothering is no longer needed. Now, simply sharing ancient wisdom that women shared within villages, irrespective of age. Less about guidance and more about exploring questions, the "right" questions together. 💞 Enjoying observing my daughter with unconditional love, and what we can learn together.
The real mind fuck is as a parent of an adult son and realizing this grown man no longer NEEDS you outside your sweet potato pie, macaroni and cheese, and my special pancakes. When he left to return overseas I cried harder then I did when he left for college.
I had mourn what our relationship use to be and celebrate the friendship that survived it.
Everything you spoke on sounds exactly like the conversations I have with myself about my parents!!! I love this.
“Why do mothers raise their daughters and love their sons” i almost collapsed 😩
The love of a mother and her son is something I can never wrap my head around. I mean, I am her daughter and was raised independent. My brother on the other hand was a bit spoiled and not so independent. This might be more prevalent in the black community but this is how I feel and it feels horrible at times to see my mom still support my brother 80 percent of the time while I'm being 100 percent my own support.....But like the podcast said, Parents are just people!!!!
Nail on the head. Talk to me like you trust what you taught me.
Love this episode; I've listened to it 5x now. Saved.
21:57 The way my adult brother will still cuddle with my mom and yet my relationship with my mom always has me doing mini calculations to figure out how to avoid setting off conflict. I can't imagine what it would be like to feel safe in the relationship like he does.
Wow! Everything in this podcast is so relatable and timely! Thank you for this!
Amanda-gurllll, you just spoke to my SOUL! Thank you for this!
I know for me it has been a conscious effort in ensuring that I didn’t apply ALL things that my parents applied to raising me. For me it was about realizing that some of the ways that did more harm then good in my childhood I didn’t want to apply to my kids. It has been conscious.
Amanda thank you for this episode. It really solidified my experience especially as an immigrant daughter.
The solo episodes are my favorite. Good job Miss Amanda 💕💕💕
I'm a woman and have a twin brother. There was definitely different expectations for each of us. He went to summer school several times and I didn't. But I also knew going to summer school wasn't an option for me...not that I wanted to go. lol I was deemed the responsible one. I had to behave, look, move a certain way that is deemed respectable. I was held accountable for my actions. Mistakes weren't allowed and when mistakes happened it was as if it was the most horrific thing. When I became an adult, I was considered too independent and trying to prove a point. Neither was true. I made sure I handled my business. But when either of my parents need something, they call me! 😁 The expectations are certainly different for daughters vs sons.
I do wish I experienced more softness while being raised. The abruptness, the toughness was too much. Because now we have to work through balancing and showing our femininity.
This episode is excellent! I have already listen more that three (3) times and I will probably do it again. Thank you for the work and love you put in our community❤❤❤
Our pleasure!
Keep dropping these gems. I wish I had the opportunity to talk you 1 on 1. This is G R E A T!
Why is there jealousy between a parent and an adult child when they grow up as a better parent, better wife, better person, or just better overall? You would think they’d be happy since a parent’s goal is to prepare their children to survive in this world.
I’m so late to this episode, but this is something I’ve been dealing with for years. This hits SO close to home
This episode was REAL AF. Wow. The inspiration you just gave me is top tier.
Thank you so much for this! Loved it from beginning to end.
Woah. Girl lemme take a break and come back 😭 the gems are DROPPING
Im just happy i can watch you via Chromecast with my family now. Lets talk intergenerational healing via incredible content.
Love this comment and you’re absolutely right! Amazing segment!
This was a beautiful podcast episode as it is real and necessary ❤
So happy I subscribed I have sooo much info to absorbbbb 🥰🥰🥰🥰
Whew this episode is entirely what I’m going through right now.
i just knew this episode was gonna have me bawlin. thank you frfr
Thank you for this. Sharing with other women healing from the mother wound with compassion and grace.
I FULLY RELATE TO THIS ENTIRE EPISODE. If I didn’t watch this, this probably would’ve taken me a lifetime to figure out this portion of my life. THANK YOU GIRL. BARZZZzz on barz.
This entire episode is spot on. Each question presented was answered with great detail and not of judgement. New subscriber!!!
Gah, we have so many commonalities! I appreciate your voice so much, Amanda. You’re my bestie in my head frfr 😭
Our mother was our central matriarch of our family. As an adult, I got to know her as not only my mother, but As an AAW.
Dear Amanda, This is honestly my first full TH-cam episode of yours I have watched all the way and I just watched it this morning. Thank You Amanda! I subscribed and saved this episode and even screen recorded lol so I have it to share and remind myself Around 45 minute that really my purpose and reasons are Still for Positivity, Saving, Moving With Positive Purpose (Everything inside of me is processing, remembering, that the intention behind actions and purpose is Be Love Active, Be And Give Grace, Annie) God Is So Good! 🌄💚🕊️
I had to sub at 21:36 the question was great and the reaction was excellent
I'm so glad you have visuals for the podcast! The set is so cute. Them pillows!!
You definitely touched a soft spot for me with this one, definitely pulled on my heartstrings. I am literally having struggles with my parent right now as an adult. It made me compassionate and made me question my anger. The end was a little scary because the thought of dissolving a relationship with my parent no matter how difficult that relationship may be is so hard for me to do. I love my mom but GOSSSSH WOW love her but WTF ! Damn it I need therapy.
I believe mothers love their sons and raise their daughters because the father is supposed to raise the son and love the daughter, so that’s why it’s important to have both parents in your life because each parent, plays a different part in the rearing of the child
Oh, I like this perspective
Though that is a great perspective, raising your daughters should never be void of love compassion grace and or empathy; In fact, more should have been given since mothers should have been able to relate to at least some aspects of that child.
My Mom was like Tokyo Toni but treated my brothers with such gentile love & caring. I had to get away from them because I knew I couldn’t heal in that toxic environment. It was so crazy that my friends would come over and ask why is she acting like that and treating me the way she did. I had to go to therapy to let that trauma go but I still have my days when I get angry thinking about all the traumatic experiences with her.
@A J ok bet
Perfectly said!❤
She got sense!
17:28 jumping back in. I knew I was going make huge mistakes as a parent. But I will say it was an interesting when my son talks about events I had no clue or he has a memory of me having locs at my wedding 20 years ago. Even though there are wedding pictures throughout the house. 😂
Even harder when you had been abandoned by said person parent!
Resonated so much with this one!
This is Gonna b so Good AS🔥🔥🔥👍n Happy Friday😀….
😮💨 lemme get ready for this one
So happy for the visual. 🎉
20:40 went through this exact process and it's so true. You really analyze your parents traumas and it correlates to everything you experienced! But I'm also the son of Jamaican parents and born and raised in NY/NJ so, the disrespect and stoicism from our parents generation was damn near slavery😂😂 🤷🏾♂️ #firstgen
FACTS!!!
This is the absolute truth!! Wish I was able to recognize all the reality that Amanda has mentioned from in my early 20’s and not 40’s! 😢
Wow. I’m 27. And legit facing this exact same issue.. only child.. single mom.. same sign three days /30 years apart and IM trying I can’t tell if she is anymore
Thank you
When parents don't want to be accountable and responsible for damages they caused, while they keep doing the damaging and extends no grace to their own children...nope that's more than wrong of them. Too, when they become grandparents they even become even more over the top with having such expectations of their children. These unhealthy dynamics are taxing, unfair. No parent, no person has no Earthly right to impose that upon others.
Yeah, i dont have parents anymore. Oh how i miss them. 😢.
gotta take a roll in G'ds greenery 23 mins in. woooooosaaaahhh hammer hit that nail hard!!!!
Brava! Well done! 🔥
Thank you 🙌
That gasp 😮💨
I have 2 daughters ages 25 and 26 who all of a sudden stopped speaking with me. I was devastated because after their dad left, I swear I did everything for them. I lost weight, and had a mild heart attack and I didn't even know why. This generation is so different than mine. I'm 56. I received a letter from my youngest and she said I had Narcissist Personality Disorder. I have Lupus, Fibromyalgia, and Osteoarthritis. I was renting a home and both daughters moved out. I am on SSDI and I did ask them to help. I used to drive semi-trucks but my body just can't handle it anymore. I sent them to college, paid for it, and did everything I could for them. I became homeless living in my vehicle me and my Pomeranian and when I asked both of them if I could stay with them and pay them I was told no by both and my oldest told me, I'll give you some Xtra blankets. I live in Flint, MI and it gets cold! Anyway, I've tried to get them to talk with me but since they won't, I am just concentrating on myself. I do know that we all reap what we sow!
It sounds like you don't have any idea why they would reject you like this. You know the children you raised and should ask yourself what could be the reasons. I can't bet you the car you're living in that they didn't help you because they feel that you are taking without any interest in giving what they feel was neglected. You ended this comment with "you reap what you sow" and I don't know if you are reflecting that to them or realize that that applies to you too.
💯to so many things you said. I think it''s also a boomer thing, my mom does so many of these things, there's such a lack of emotion and stoicism from that generation, so the traumas, emotions, growth, etc can't be discussed bc of that lack of emotional coping skills, and my mom is a therapist LOL. The past is too deep to deal w, and bring it up even when you're working on growth, healthy coping skills, including healthy boundaries, on your own, not trying to put them down for the shit you unfortunately were exposed to. I respect and love my mom 100 for her tenacity and reliabilty in my life, and many other things. Despite always being 'wrong' w everything I say, as a 45 year old 2 degree holding woman, and my sister being the 'son', the favored one. I can see it all in the macro lense, the emotional traumas are so hard to deal w when they can't meet you somewhere, I just accept where I can get, and try and put the boundaries where I can. And try to give grace as much as I can., but it's hard. Still have work to do on myself. Thanks for sharing this, makes one feel less alone in dealing w these complexities🙌
Yes electric slide
Stopping by to get this over 200 just came from Instagram. It's past midnight overseas I gotta go to sleep 😅Been binging Amanda content tonight lol,Revolt interview, Instagram, now I am back here🤪.
Awesome! Thank you!
I’m my daughter’s mom and she should hold me to a measure of excellence. It’s a wonderful opportunity to be more.
Great show
Professor Seales out here, let me take a class!😏
Just sub❤❤❤
Preach! Amanda! I co sign as a Therapist!!!
Thank you!
Exactly.
Did I miss where you talked about your part in how it was that way? I heard about the secual exploration that I hope is part of everyone's life. What part is pride playing in your side of things. Since we are all someone's children, it is easy to identify our parent's point(s) of pride. I know you do your work, and it's not our business, do you know your part? Thanks for the great buffet. I am in the AmandaVerse, so I am hopping over there now.
My mom tries to prove her trauma was worse than mine!? And I honestly feel she avoided getting to know me and just moved on with her next kids. Now I avoid her
Amanda all I can say is Yooooooo!
Heeeey hey. Im loving the braids. You finally got ya box braids. Wait. Is this old, becuz earlier i saw you with a hat and jordan shirt. Lol.
yes I get twists all the time! I recorded this a few weeks ago
@@TheAmandaSeales 🥰
I just don’t think you understand what it is to be a parent until you become one. Once your adult children become parents many of the things they judged you for they come to understand about you.
Great point
And God help the kids who grew up with folks whose personality styles lean narcissistic... That's a whole bag of 💩 right there...
What happens when they end up changing later and loving thr daughters and realizing that they never raised thr sons?
This gets highlighted a lot when they realize the son never had goals, and or amounts to nothing.
Phew that's gotta be a doozie. Do the daughters feel redeemed?? Do the adult sons become the black sheep? That makes for some awkward holiday dinners!
I'm searching for a support group for raising kids while raising your parents?!?! Lawd help
Let me know when you find one, because this is SO HARD! I am almost terrified of my kids getting older and not like me as a person! Big difference between being the“parent” and being a “person” that the child grows into an adult and actually like as an individual..
As I get older I realize that my parents did what they could with what they had…
How do questions get submitted?
I post a call for questions on my IG when I record the episodes every monday
To handle it
How would you like your parents to talk to you, as an adult?
big facts
so many thigh slappers and gems on this episode. jesus.
I love that
Cut it, cut it, cut it!
Thank you for this. Immigrant Daughter
Frfr…
There a topic Side effects of an immigrant parent
This is very interesting because someone from the industry via probably some church and the shade room and jason lee hollywood unlocked i guess, has been taking (also Hi Trevor Noah) sound bites and "Gem Drops" from my computer, phones, and even my classroom. And I do remember precisely because this a 'gem drop' that I tell my students not as an excuse for their parents but so that they can be strong alongside their parent, it is exactly that Amanda "one thing I remind students of now is that their parents are just people, at the end of the day we have to remember that, so that we have empathy for them as parents." The rest of this video is seemingly also shaped around some man's church assumption about how Women need to act and how Women raise their daughters, and how sex isn't the thing, because apparently I'm a ho, which is also WRONG. I am not. But the same men would also like for that to be true, is that not correct. So, I hope that it isn't the same people and group giving themselves excuses that they are allowed to report by the law on whatever it is they want. OKAY LIARS. That's what you're reporting, and that's what you lyfe is. Good job. I love your show and things. Thank you.
Chile dated one of those
Real is rare babe
My indecisive azz keep bouncing from ig to yt
I was an only child
Closeless? NOPE. Only child, here..