Stop Your Child from Hitting!
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ก.ค. 2024
- If your child is hitting others or you, this video will tell you how to get them to stop hitting! Toddlers especially hit others to express anger, frustration, or dominance... but sometimes children hit others because they think it's funny.
You can teach your child not to hit others in 7 easy steps which you can learn in this video. Toddlers can learn that hitting others is not okay and children can learn to regulate their behavior by controlling their urge to hit others.
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Disclaimer:
The content on this channel is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice in relation to physical health issues.
If you have a concern about your child's medical condition, seek professional medical advice immediately.
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I appreciate the detailed explanation in this video. It is really helpful to get into the mind of the child and help them understand how to behave better
Sarah Smith
There will be a new video coming out soon about biting, scratching, hitting and kicking with a really good suggestion! Stay tuned!
Now I need to find a video that will advise me on how to do all these without being pissed or frustrated myself.
Try this one…
th-cam.com/video/Ouqt0l3PMoU/w-d-xo.html
There are several about not being angry on the channel.
Hmm I'm reading book " calm parents, happy kids" really good one.
We all thank you for your compassionate awareness ..
🙏
Thank you for the advice! My youngest doesn’t realize he is hurting others and I was doing time out instead of having them calm down and then talk. Thanks!!!
Have you seen the video about “time out”?
Here’s the link
th-cam.com/video/5WNWYz7Aanw/w-d-xo.html
Thank you for the comment!
Immediately adress without anger
Look at the person they hit,injury they caused.
Have an eye to eye conversation.
Let them think about the action.
Have a follow-up conversation.
Encourage apologize.
Role play.
Thank you for listing the steps! Nice!
This video is by far the best on a child and bad behavior. She’s the best.
Well…I just have to agree with you 😃thank you for the comment!
I now feel more informed about my how to deal with my 4 year old son that has a tendency to do this. Thank you.
I m suffering same
Thanks for sharing. Great advice 👏🏼
Hope it helps! Thanks for the comment!
Thank you! You helped me so much I appreciate it
You are very welcome! I'm glad it helped you.
Excellent information praying it works 😔
Don’t hit THEM! Most kids learn that behavior by seeing others do it and then they think “wow that’s a great tool to have the desired effect on the world”. And then they learn it works!!! By hitting, biting, scratching, what have you they get their desired effect even if for a moment. That got that toy they wanted or they got your undivided attention for a bit even if you were telling them how unkind that was. Replace as many “no’s” with “yeses” as you can. For example “instead of biting to show your excitement, can you try hugging instead?” Not even kidding I had a kid in my class that chomped the flesh off of people because he was so excited 😂 it doesn’t last forever. Your toddler won’t be bludgeoning people with their cars in high school. Great video thank you for having this out there!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I think we may agree on a lot, but disagree in some ways too. I appreciate you sharing comment.
Thank you for sharing
Thank you so much for this video, I have learned a lot.
Thank you so much, good advice
Thanks for this video...
Most welcome
My friend is having trouble with this. Sending it to her. Thanks!!
Did it work?
@@MommyAnswerLady she’s working on it 🙂
thanks
Thank you!
That’s a good video! I’m glad to report that I do almost all the steps. Question: how would I get my 5 year old to stay still (like not play with toys) for when he is to think about his action? And what’s an example of what they can do instead? This would help with role play too. I’ve done role play but not with an example. He laughs.
Thank you for the question.
He is not to do anything. He is to sit and think about what he has done and come to you when he is ready. The whole point is for him to concentrate -- not be distracted by an activity.
Thanks
For not gulo blake
Thank u
Videos are amazing🎉
Very informative video and new subby. My question is how to break hitting when a child isn't with you? I have a 4 year old who throws tantrums and hits at daycare/school. He doesn't hit the children but the teacher if he doesn't like something or if the teacher takes something away. He doesn't act like that at home not one bit. I recently changed his daycare to one with cameras so I can see him throughout the day and what I saw threw me into utter shock. I was looking at a completely different child. I ended up finding out his previous daycare is really short staffed, there's 28 children in his room to two adults hints major reason I switched facilities that he attended for 3 years. Previous facility doesn't have cameras and the teachers weren't relaying his behavioral issues at school so when I picked him up I always thought he simply had a good day at school and boy was I wrong. For months, him and other children were able to do literally anything they wanted when they want. Now he has these bad habits he associates with being ok at daycare because again he's completely different at home. I went up to the school when I saw him misbehaving on the camera. He would listen for a while then fall right back into the same bad habits. After a week the daycare decided that facility isn't a good fit for him and asked for him not to come back. Any tips or programs you know of would be greatly appreciated🙂
I'm sorry you are struggling. I know it is difficult.
My first suggestion is not going to be something you will like. Stay home with your son. He needs you and these formative years are the most important time. That would be the very best thing to do. Put aside all other things and take time to live with him day in and day out meeting his needs and teaching and training him. This will also let him know that he is your first priority. Even if you have to live in a smaller home, drive a less expensive car, etc.
Now, since I don't know you... I realize that you may be the sole provider in your home. If that is the case, then I'm going to send you a video that will help you work with the daycare workers. But also another that will give you direction about how to connect with your son in a way that he will need throughout his life.
Let me know if you have any further questions. You can do this!
How to help him stop hitting, etc and the daycare worker to know what to do.
th-cam.com/video/k6eY3qR3EZc/w-d-xo.html
How to connect with your child in a way that is very important
th-cam.com/video/83trk-HR7qU/w-d-xo.html
Hey this is very well put. As an EC professional I have seen many toddler hit. As a natural prek teacher yet assigned to the toddler classroom to lead this was challenging. I had one toddler that was the fastest toddler I have ever seen, pushed the youngest in the class (just transition to my class), and hit myself. Unfortunately the other teachers would not assist so that I could take action on the child in the way you showed. I actually was told by the director that we had to let the toddler be sooth and pacified and allowed to hit or simply they denied they hit or the hitting was not a problem .When I took him away from the situation, told him it was not right, and gave him a break to think on it. Then come back to him for follow up. It was rushed because my co-teachers in other classrooms and director was not pleased I was teaching in my same process you shared. I had to resign yet the director was not pleased with this process and let me go early.
I ask you what do you say when EC Centers or parents say this is all normal and let them hit and they will grow out of it on their own. I have to share my husband was a child which this was allowed and it caused lack self control in stressful situation to get angry. I believe this process works when it used. Yet what do you say to professionals and parents that think they need to take a passive and pleasing the child and they the adult should take the break and let the kids hit ????
Alissa Amos
Thank you so much for your comment.
Unfortunately many parenting professionals today do not teach that children need to learn to behave. Instead they have been taught by their professors in school to distract, pacify, or coddled bad behavior.
This is exactly the reason why there is so much turmoil in the parenting world. And why parents are so frustrated when they look to professionals for answers and are told to allow their children to misbehave.
I’m sorry you experienced this. Clearly a child who is hitting needs to be taught not to do that by direct intervention and instruction.
They also need to learn to apologize as this video teaches.
You have hit on a problem that I am encountering many times when teaching parents how to train their children to behave. Many professionals are not willing to cross the line that has been drawn in the parenting world regarding teaching and training.
Pacifying is the preferred method in the modern parenting world. That is too bad and it is why we see so many children out of control and parents In constant state of exhaustion and frustration.
I am not a teacher or psych major but we have been having a problem with my son hitting at daycare multiple times over the past couple weeks. My girlfriend has finally jumped on board with my disciplinary action of he gets no toys or treats for the remainder of the night. However, if he is told he is good the next day he will get his toys and a surprise (his mothers idea to get him to behave) he has an amazing day the following. I am not his biological father but he acknowledges me as his dad as I've been there while hes growing and all the things dads should do, so I'm afraid to speak my mind with her to try and correct this behavior. Her response is normally against mine because she knows I grew up in an abusive household and I believe she is afraid I will turn out like my father. I have spanked him before, which she doesnt agree with, but have refrained from it recently in respect for her. But her approach is more of the be good get rewarded style. I dont agree with it at all because hes now conditioned that if he is TOLD hes good he will get something so he behaves. If there's no promise of a toy or surprise he hits or yells. Any advice to work on this issue would be appreciated. Thank you
This last couple of day's my oldest is hitting me in my face, then i took away her phone and games. she was shouting at me and said no no. then i told her she must stop because she never did this before. Didn't know what to do, i'm going to try this.🤗
From my son's school complaint came by stating that, he is hiting others by hard toys.. if teacher give him paper to write, he through the paper in dustbin and if teachers stop him from hitting others he try to bite them..my son is 3and half years old
Hey love this vid but my son is 1 so some steps i just don’t think he can comprehend a time out or a follow up convo
Yes, I understand. You have to adjust it per age. But the actions taken can be the same generally.
I suggest you watch this other video about what to do when toddler says “no” to you. Combine things in it and this one to do what works for your child.
Also look at the one about diaper change battles. All these will give you an idea of how to handle a one year old who is hitting.
th-cam.com/video/3B3wLc1oEnM/w-d-xo.html
This will teach my sister a lesson.
My son never beats or bites anyone, and he never fights over toys or things like that. But, it's hard for me to see other kids doing that to him. He usually doesn't do anything about it, and I'm unsure if I should encourage him to defend himself and also how he should do that. I think he has a very kind heart I don't want him to loose that. He is almost 2yr.
See the playlist about Bullies on this channel.
My 3 year old son will be lying in bed and happy while reading a book to him then just hit me or my husband out of nowhere! Or he will be hugging us then suddenly start scratching!!! It's so confusing because he's happy but he has this aggression that just comes over him! And he doesn't feel bad at all he thinks it's funny when he gets in trouble he smiles. 😩
What have you done in response to that behavior?
I am in the same situation, I have spoken to him calmly that hitting is bad and hands re far eating he says it is bad listens understands again in few mins does the same. I have also tried handling it with a hard tone both at different times none of it worked.
@@Prabu85
Who is he hitting and what are the circumstances surrounding this behavior?
@@MommyAnswerLady my 3 year old son, keeps pushing and hitting for no reason even while he is playing with me.
@@Prabu85
What kind of play? Does he throw tantrums at all?
Can you pls make a video on interview questions,, like what type of questions day care ask you for job
If I get several requests for this, I will. Thank you for your comment. 😊
My 3 year old hits almost exclusively at school. I don’t know how to address this when I am not there to witness it. Her teachers say she isn’t angry when she hits, usually it’s just to get something she wants. I’m sure it has something to do with learning how to share but I highly when I try to talk to her about it she just parrots me back and goes about her business. I just want her to stop hitting kids 😣
I’m sorry you are struggling. I’m sending you a link that explains a solution to how to work with a teacher and your child to remind them not to hit or do other aggressive things. Lmk if you have questions.
th-cam.com/video/k6eY3qR3EZc/w-d-xo.htmlsi=BxW5QHfn8xNvyy0f
We have practiced everything you mentioned in this video, however my 3 yr old grandson continues to hit, kick, throw rocks and sticks at people. He has been behaving this way since the age of two and will be four 10/10/22. He has been kicked out of four daycare facilities so far and I have been told by the daycare Director soon will be number 5. Any advice will be greatly appreciated!
There is more going on than just this behavior then. Why is he living at grandparents home rather than with his parents?
What do you do if you were in a car with five children and my special needs child does not want to listen when I tell her to stop what do I do from there and how do I get her to recognize what is she doing is wrong
Thank you for asking.
First of all, you must realize that you should not give an excuse to a child to misbehave because they have special needs. If you do that, you have already lost the battle. Special needs children may need to be handled differently depending on the situation, but they should not be allowed to misbehave and use their circumstances as an excuse. That starts with you. YOU need to have the mindset that bad behavior is not acceptable no matter which child it is coming from and that all children feel better about themselves and do better in life if they know how to behave.
Next, I suggest you look at this video to give you some more pointers on how to teach your children to listen when you speak. If you have any more specific questions, please lmk. I appreciate your comments!
th-cam.com/video/uXs2347W-AU/w-d-xo.html
9 kids!!!!🤯😱
Okay I have a 7-year-old autism child and he hits other kids in school but he only do it when it's time for them to play in the school compound Iran he have energy but he plays and hit he hates them very hard and he don't understand because he cannot speak he do not communicate normal if I talk to him all he said is okay but he go back and do the same every time he is playing I cannot control it and I know how to stop it
What do I do with a child who is 6 almost 7 and still being very aggressive?
What do you mean by aggressive? And aggressive to whom?
Love you video. From India
Thank you!
Will this work for a three year old who is barely speaking ? I’m going through this now when he is not getting his way even with other adults .. out of frustration and anger
Every child is different, but there is no reason not to apply it for a three year old. My concern is why is your 3 year old "barely speaking?" Have you taken him to be evaluated for speech and hearing issues?
When someone does bad things to me, I will be angry and not hit them
when I try to talk to my son (2years old) he doesn’t listen and tries to redirect the reprimand to something else. Like the advent calendar or toys. Then he screams and hits the wall. He won’t listen
I am sorry you are struggling. It sounds like he doesn’t believe you are in charge.
I suggest you look at the other videos on this channel and also go to my website and order my book. It’s available as an audiobook too.
You need to learn how to take charge so he will take you seriously and you direct his focus when you speak to him.
You can do it!
The child is our neighbour she is 3 and she shouts uncontrollablly and hits me sometimes without any reason and even says me to cry
I’m sorry to hear that.
I made my son stop hitting others in one simple step, I grabbed my belt and smacked him really hard on his butt.. Not out of anger but out of a corrective manner (tough love).
After I hit him and he stopped crying, I told him, every time you hit I will hit you also.. After that day he never hit any other kid spontaneously.
Are you serious? Or is this the 1950's?
@@monicamccoy9777 1950s really? Those were not corrective smacks nor tough love, those times were truly dark.. Well it worked with my kid, I never had to smack him again, and he doesn't hit other kids..
Hello, thanks for the video. I have a question. My sister has a 1.5 years baby. She says the baby often hits her and throw away things. Then after all this the baby laughs. My sister says it is difficult to manage the baby as the baby is always hitting and very agressive. What can be the reason for this?
The child likely sees this as a game and hasn’t been effectively taught that it’s not ok. She needs to understand it’s not a game and it’s not acceptable.
Mom needs to take a firm hold and assert her authority as a mom. Look child in the eye, holding hand tightly…uncomfortably if necessary. Look in the eye…”NO hitting.”
Also, if child laughs after this behavior, a good swift swat on the behind without anger, a look straight in the eye again and say “No hitting.” Very strongly.
The child cannot be allowed to laugh about this without a swift consequence. This is how she will understand it’s not acceptable.
Consistent, strong assertion of authority and clear communication and action is what will change the scenario.
Thanks a lot for the reply. I really appreciate that.
I have a problem with my 3 year old. He hits everyone he is near even the dog. I have tried talking.time out and taking things away. No punishment or talking seems to help him he just continues hitting and laughing. Please any advice for this.
THis video tells exactly what to do. How can I help?
My grandson is 3 and when I have him take a little think break he says, "yeah right!" And walks off or hits me again.
That is unacceptable. What do you do in response?
Sounds like he needs a swat on the behind and another look in the eye telling him to have a seat until he can apologize and behave.
He needs to know what is and is not acceptable. Seems he has learned disrespect and needs a new lesson.
This can all be done without any anger on your part.
@@MommyAnswerLady I just hold his hands down at his side and tell him how much it hurts me that he does that. His an angry little guy, his mom,my daughter is an active fentynol user And so we are really struggling with anger and hurt feelings.
@@littlesliver7354
There are SO many short videos that explain how to deal with him…3 things every child should know…why children misbehave…9 steps to better behavior…I hope you will look on this channel and find them.
He needs to have a real connection every day at least twice a day. Do eye to eye time.
Eye to eye time is 5-10 minutes where you focus completely on your child. Turn off your phone, computer, TV and any other distractions and give them your full face to face attention.
Allow them to tell you anything they like about their day, dreams, hopes, sorrows, struggles, etc. Listen and talk things through but remember this is not a reprimand time. It’s time to build your relationship.
Then follow instructions for specific behaviors.
@@MommyAnswerLady I feel like your frustrated with your viewers comments. Do you not want to be asked for parenting advice?
Tsk-tsk 5-10 minutes of face to face time is not nearly enough "face time" for a 3 year old.
@@littlesliver7354
Not frustrated... and 5-10 minutes of very focused time twice a day in addition to ALL the other information about relationship building and teaching and training I give is enough.
I suspect you haven't watched much of my content or read my book.... LOL
Do you have any videos on how to teach a child to be gentle? My daughter doesn’t hit and isn’t aggressive but she’s kind of a bulldozer going through our home, especially around her baby brother she always ends up inadvertently hurting him
How old is your daughter?
@@MommyAnswerLady she just turned 2 years old
The best way to teach her is through practice and training. At a time of no conflict, take her dolls, stuffed toys, etc and talk to her about how wonderful it is to be gentle. Show her how to gently pet the stuffed toy, how to gently stroke the hair of the doll, etc.
Have her participate by choosing which doll or toy she wants to gently play with while you are there. Then, show her how to gently place the toy on the floor, pick it up, etc. Smile and make it a positive experience.
Then, bring her baby brother into the play and talk to her about how to be gentle with him too.
You should also consider making sure you are doing eye to eye time at least twice a day with her. This is to make sure her behavior isn't intentional because of any jealousy she may have regarding her younger sibling. Also, have her help care for brother by bringing things to you like a clean diaper, or putting the dirty one in the trash, holding a bottle if baby takes any water, formula or juice in one. Have her help with bath time, etc.
The more she is part of the care of her brother, the more likely she will want to be gentle with him and will learn to be concious of his needs and feelings.
Here is the video about eye to eye time in case you don't know what that is:
th-cam.com/video/83trk-HR7qU/w-d-xo.html
I hope this helps! LMK if you have any more questions.
@@MommyAnswerLady thank you so much!!! Immensely helpful!
My baby is 3 1/2 yr. She is getting much angry. Most of the time after sleeping or while sleeping she is hitting me and saying go like that my dad also if she does wrong thing shouting. I also try to control her she says go go like that hitinh quickly she changes to angry mood earlier not like that
Get my book.
Hello My child is one year old when I don't do what he wants or don't let him
Do something or even without reason (this is seldom) he hits me in face when I give him an explanation he just continues hitting me or he hits himself how I can make him
Realize that he is doing something bad?
What do you to now? What action do you take?
Do similar to this:
th-cam.com/video/x63YoV4VSLU/w-d-xo.htmlsi=KgenmqnFBir9yBB7
How about a child who seek help about hitting and say they don't know how to stop it
When they mad they got empty brain and can't control their hands.
Advice and tips?
How old is this child? More details?
I am struggling with my five year old who just destorys or spills everything and hits bites and scratches anyone who tries to move him to a safe spot. I try to discuss things with him and he starts hitting me
I’m sorry you are struggling. It sounds like he needs a connection of significance and you need to take charge.
Until you remedy this, it will likely only get worse. There are lots of resources here but also on my website. Please lmk how I can help further.
Www.mommyanswerlady.com.
@@MommyAnswerLady I restrain him and move him away from others but it took him 20 min to calm down. Starting ADHD counseling and medicine soon. He seems to get angry over anything that doesnt go his way which makes it very difficult to avoid triggers but once he is calm he behaves wonderfully and apologizes.
@@drcoke2786
I can only ask that you do not get him counseling with someone who will suggest drugs. He does not need to be drugged.
He needs a connection and a clear understanding of how to handle himself when he doesn’t get his way--and guidance to channel his aggression in productive ways.
He needs to feel accomplished and significant. He needs to understand duty and a desire to achieve.
And, the source of his anger needs to be revealed. Drugs will not take care of the underlying problem. They will only subdue him and mask it.
How would you handle situation done at school. You pick them up and they tell you they hurt people at school how would you go about teaching them that lesson hours after
How old is your child? Will you explain what you mean by the tell you they hurt people?
@@MommyAnswerLady just turned 5 yesterday. Sometime they did not know what happens before but the teacher would tell me he put his hand on some that day or throw something at someone. He wills sometimes say because he wanted to and when you say no you can't do that to people.. he will say but I want to. I do not think he really does always only say this in the heat of it.
The time we do know it was over having to stop playing ,they did not know what happened before hand or one incident that a teacher was involved in a minute kid weren't getting along with some blocks and she came along and said well let's put them away and he threw the blocks at her and the other kid. .
So I guess I over explained but he hits or throws things when he mad. Today it was he wanted this doll and thia girl got it first so he hit her then the teacher. I just don't know want to do. I know what my family did is not the way but am very lost on what is
@@breakingdawn166
First I think you should watch this video from start to finish.
Then see if you can work with the teacher to help implement the suggestions. Lmk how it goes!
th-cam.com/video/k6eY3qR3EZc/w-d-xo.html
Are all of these steps necessary for an 18 month old? He understands a lot of language but he can’t speak very well yet
Do what you can and what he is capable of doing. Use the concept and apply age appropriately.
Hi again. If he hits me do I just do the same technique? He claws me and other people legs alot.
Natties Snails
Take hold of his hands firmly to the point of being uncomfortable...., hold them and say, “No” in a low firm tone.
Then, yes. Do the rest like setting him aside and letting him know it is unacceptable by looking away and letting him sit alone for a minute.
@@MommyAnswerLady
Hi how long can this method take until they stop throwing? I feel like he thinks it's a game.
Also his started to touch two of my pictures on the wall repeatedly. Jeez he sounds like such a tearaway 😂😂 so I take his hand and say firmly don't touch the pictures. My mum said I should take the pictures down, but I like them. He has to learn not to touch them. By the way his nearly 2 and his not speaking yet, so do you think that's why his not understanding what I mean when I say no?
He knows Exactly what you are telling him to do. It sounds like he is a strong willed child. That’s OK! Don’t worry. But I suspect possibly you aren’t getting the point across by looking him in the eye and doing a low tone and changing your entire demeanor when he does this. And you are correct. You should not remove the pictures. The pictures being there are a an opportunity to teach him to learn to behave. He should be able to be right there by those pictures and not touch them because you have told him not to.
This should only have to be done a few times. Would it be true that he doesn’t obey and many other areas? Is someone else taking care of them where things are not always consistent?
Another question for you. Have you had him tested for hearing? I’m not saying he isn’t hearing you, but when you say he’s not speaking yet it makes me wonder if he can hear OK. Some children may not do words very well yet or put sentences together at two, but he should be saying some words by now.
My child doesn’t really care about hurting others…what to do?
What do you mean? How do you know this?
I do think this is a good video, but the one issue that I notice is the assumption that the parent will have the right temperament and a face their child after they were hitting.
Thank you for your comment.
I cannot address every parental issue but make it clear that this needs to be addressed without anger.
There are other videos on this channel that try to help parents have an understanding of their own emotions with suggestions about how to be calm.
Other than that, I’m not sure what else I can do other than give tools on how to take care of specific issues.
What do you suggest?
Young children, like the ones in this video, do not "bully". They lack the cognitive skills and/or understanding of what "bullying" is, how it works or how to use it to obtain their desired result. I read your bio. Congrats on your success with home schooling, however, before you make a blanket statement you should at least do some research into those theorists whom you seem to "poo-poo" in your bio.
Young children are learning about dominance, power and control as they grow. Even young ones are LEARNING about this and experimenting with how they treat and respond to others. If you don't know that, what I tell you isn't going to help you understand better.
I would suggest you don't know anything about how much or how little research I have done into those I "poo poo". I stand by every statement I made in this video when it is taken in context.
If unknown child hit for no reason for my 6 year child mam.....is he also hit back....or what he do mam..? Plz reply me
There are too many questions in that scenario to answer appropriately. I do not know the situation in enough detail to give an answer.
I love your videos press this one😊
good !!!!! not blahblah but real strategy!!!
I'm a kid on my dad's account btw right now. MY LITTLE SIS KEEPS HITTING ME LIKE 50 TIMES A DAY
AND LITERALLY WHEN I TOUCH HER BY LIKE A MOLECULE SHE TATTLE TALES LIKE I SLAPPED HER TO MOM AND MOM LITERALLY MAKES ME CRY FOR LIKE 5 HOURS STRAIGHT. BUT WHEN SHE TOUCHES ME LIKE FOR LIKE 1 MINUTE STRAIGHT EVERY HOUR AND WHEN I TELL MY MOM JUST MAKES ME CRY IN MY BED FOR LIKE 20 MINUTES. BTW IF YOU SUGGEST ALL THE REASONS IN THIS VIDEO, I TRIED TO DO ALL THOSE THINGS
REASONS MY MOM LITERALLY HATES ME THE MOST :
THATS WHY.
NOTHING
SHE ABUSES ME BY
Forcing me to eat and over feeding
Hitting me even when I throw like a pencil at my little sis like at 1 mile a day
More over eating and forcing me to
More over eating and forcing me to
When I don't eat she slaps me then I cry then she slaps me for crying and I keep crying till I almost run out of tears
Too abusive mom
How old are you?
I have really problems with my 7 years old
How can I help?
Starts with 1:30
I have a two year old baby boy who hits other people. If I try to say no to him he cries a lot and keeps on throwing tantrums. God knows how should I communicate with him? Absolutely clueless.
I’m sorry you are struggling.
Tantrums must be stopped before you can get the rest of the issues taken care of.
Your child is a perfect age for CTM. This method will teach him not to behave that way and then things will calm down. You must take charge so he can have peace and so can you.
I’ll send you the link in a minute. I also suggest you look at the entire tantrum playlist on this channel.
Here is the video with instructions for stopping tantrums. Watch the entire video all the way to the end and take notes. Lmk if you have any questions.
th-cam.com/video/SEMcTzLHAn8/w-d-xo.html
@@MommyAnswerLady thank you so much
My son have autisme and he does not listen but hit throwing thing around
This is a good video and honestly it would be perfect for me and my son if it wasn't for the fact that he's nonverbal. So make a video about how to address the issue to a nonverbal child. No it doesn't happen all the time but I could use some advice on how to apply this to a nonverbal child.
Thank you. Please explain the reason for your sweet child being nonverbal. How old is he? What is his condition?
@@MommyAnswerLady He is 9 years old. He is autistic. He had a brain injury at 15 months old because we were in car accident and he was lucky to survive and bounce back as well as he did. But because he can't talk he gets more frustrated than a normal kid when he can't have my phone to play with. Even though it only lasts 5 minutes and not much longer, he seems to almost have a complete meltdown whenever the phone dies because he is so addicted to it it's not even funny. So when I have to charge the phone it is all I can do to get it out of his sight. I put it in the bathroom, close the door, put the huge jewelry box in front of the door because if I don't, he won't even wait until it is charged to 1% or 2% sometimes before going straight in there to unplug it from the charger. He absolutely does not understand just how long it takes to charge a phone. He has very little patience if any at all.
@@patriciaedwards6793
I understand. I know you are struggling and I hope you will allow me to be frank.
The first thing is the addiction to the phone needs to be remedied. This is not healthy for him. It’s important not to allow yourself to let his disabilities stand in the way of teaching him to behave. A child who is addicted to screens and not taught to behave will be easily angered and depressed.
I have a grown son with Asperger’s, ADHD and visually impaired. These disabilities never stood in the way of my expectations for him to behave. And I’m so very glad they didn’t.
He would get frustrated more easily, but that just meant he had to learn self-control more diligently. And he did.
I wasn’t a perfect mom, so don’t get me wrong. I would get impatient too. But I was determined that he would learn to behave, be happy and content. Growing our relationship was key.
You must take charge of this phone issue and find other things that he will be interested in. He needs other outlets to express himself and accomplish goals.
You can look him in the eye, speak straight to him, and have him sit out until he apologizes even if it is with signals or sign language that you teach him.
He can understand to earn screen privileges. There is another video about screen addiction in kids on this channel. That may help give you more ideas.
If he learns programming or other things that are constructive on screen, that’s good. Games are not, so limit those.
@@MommyAnswerLady I don't know. I think that it would be a little too harsh of me to completely deprive him of the phone. He is very well behaved. The only thing that frustrates him to no end is when it dies. Thank you for your opinion but I do not believe that punishing my son or upsetting him even more is the answer. I actually do limit his time on the screen but I don't believe he deserves to completely lose it entirely. He has trouble expressing himself. He does not know how to tell me that he's upset or mad. That is why this happens. We have tried sign language with him several times in the past. But he has never shown interest in it. I am actually trying to improve his handwriting skills and other skills so I already take the phone away for at least one hour or a little more. And nothing that he watches is inappropriate. He loves anything with letters or numbers on TH-cam with music playing and bright colors in the background of the video. Mostly what he watches is intended for toddlers but that's because he is mentally 5 or 6 years old.
@@patriciaedwards6793if he’s very well behaved then what’s his issue
Easier said than done.
All things are easier said than done.
Hi, I would like to collaborate with your channel. Dealing with Feeling helps people cope with feelings. We aim to help children cope with feelings early on so they do not struggle with emotions later on but know them as drivers on their path.
What age is is for? Great bideo
It’s really for young children - basically toddlers and up to kindergarten. What age solution are you looking for?
what is the right response?
???
@@MommyAnswerLady you have mentioned the way to respond to a child and kind of like this but not how or what to teach the child how he would do instead of hitting
@@shimondoodkin
That would depend on the reasons and circumstances for the hitting that happened. What if it was because a toy was taken away from them? What if they were just frustrated? What if they were hit first?
Not all things can be covered in one video. The reason the child hit in the first place can be addressed and teaching how to handle those different situations after the initial correction of the behavior.
Hitting is very illegal
Saying spanking is like hitting, and both are illegal. Is like saying driving is like speeding. Not true.
Unfortunately these Tips are not for a Just 2 year old
Why do you say that?
my daughter is 18 months old and she hits all of the family members irrespective of her mood..seems just a way of playing,,not sure how to make her understand this .
Did you see the video and implement? What is your response to her hitting? What is her response to that?
@@MommyAnswerLady how can I communicate with my 18mo. She doesn't understand anything right. In video its mostly about communication so I have to wait.
@@happinessisachoice2733
If your infant is hitting, taking her hand, looking her straight in the eye and squeezing and saying “no hitting” with a low tone and eyebrows down WILL communicate to her this is unacceptable.
She is 18 months old! She certainly can understand this. Don’t underestimate her ability.
Make the squeeze of her hand very firm and determined. Your look, expression and action will communicate to her.
Be consistent. And do it immediately.
You can do this!
@@MommyAnswerLady sure let me try this
My 3 year toddler is doing for fun by hitting. How to stop? He don't understand it
I'm not sure what to tell you. The video explains what to do. Can you explain in more detail so that I can give you more specific advice?
@@MommyAnswerLady he has speech delay and he use his way of expressing by hitting other babies and enjoying it
@@MommyAnswerLady wen I try to explain it he is not able to understand it. And keep hitting babies
If he is three years old and you are telling him "No", he understands. He is just disobeying you. What is your response to his behavior?
@@MommyAnswerLady I will try to move him away from that place. But he mostly get frustrated. He wants to play with babies
My partner has done all this and she still gets hit
What do you mean “my partner” and what are the circumstances going on in the home?
@@MommyAnswerLady single mum 3 children 1 on the way the 3 are from two different partners that hit mum the 6 year old has hit and mum's sis mum has bruses up and down her arms she has been kicked in her legs the little girl has tried to push mum down the stairs she has hit mum on the back of her head and neck to the point mum has passed out she has hit mum down her back kicked mum in her side mum had that much pain she had to go to hospital to get checked over in case she has lost are baby the girl has him mum's sis in the back with mum's boots Ash tray a charger with wire in the charger she has bruses on her back the girl has said and done it that she will hit her self and say mum has done it she has given mum a black eye she has run up the street shouting someone help me she told mum she is going to stay up all night and hit mum the girl has told school she hits mum
@Kenneth Sumner
I’m sorry thrre is so much turmoil.
This serious situation will not be solved with an online tutorial. There are numerous issues besides a little child hitting under normal circumstances.
There has been abuse to and from the child. This situation calls for in person counseling and family therapy. Please seek it immediately.
@@MommyAnswerLady she as asked for help and the social services in the uk have taken the children and have blamed mum for it
I'm sorry to hear of all of this. She has made life choices that have put her and her children in dangerous situations --- so it makes sense that the authorities are trying to do what they can to save the children from further trauma. She has shown that she does not have the judgment or skills to properly care for and teach her children.
I hope she gets help soon to learn those things she needs to in order to correct her mindset and change her circumstances. But, it will take a complete change in her for this to happen.
This is not beneficial for dealing with a 3 year old in a blind tantrum. There is no way to get him to calm down and the tantrum can last around 15 minutes. There is no calm discussion
I don’t think you watched the video in full from your comment. If a child is throwing a tantrum, a discussion is not effective or even possible. This video wasn’t addressing tantrums.
A tantrum is a completely different matter. CTM is a training method to stop tantrum behaviors. Look at the tantrum playlist on this channel for information about that.
#4 is pretty hard with a two year old boy. I think I need duct tape.
No hit
?
My son push other children in kindergarten.. please help
Sorry you are struggling. See this video and then lmk if you have questions.
th-cam.com/video/k6eY3qR3EZc/w-d-xo.html
@@MommyAnswerLady my son is also having difficulty in processing of information. He doesn’t understand the social ques.
We going to see the doctor soon but please advise something. I wanna try my best
Please help
@@sheetubishnoi626
Going to a doctor is a good idea if he is not processing information in truth.
Did you follow these instructions? Consistently? Did you look on this channel for other videos related that will also help?
@@MommyAnswerLady yes I am following the instructions mentioned in this video. Also trying to get as much as information by watching videos.
@@sheetubishnoi626
From here, that’s really all I can do. I don’t know all the specifics, but there are likely other issues causing his behavior.
Your response to it will make a difference in him. If he is in school away from you all day, and then doesn’t have a good connection with you before and after that. that is a problem.
Your relationship being an appropriate parent/child dynamic matters a lot.
Don't want your kid to hit others?
1. Never hit your kid.
2. Never hit anyone when your kid is around.
3. Always interpose yourself when anyone hits your kid.
Sounds easy. There’s more to it than that. Much more. Thank you for the comment.
@@MommyAnswerLady Thanks for reading and replying. I don't get that often, so my comment must have come across as dry and confrontational. I simply wrote what came to mind.
I know your video is more about what to do in the moment, but I find it very, very rare that people talk about prevention rather than correction.
So I would like to point out, in reply to what you wrote, that simple doesn't mean easy. Even addressing this issue is hard. Simple truths are often the hardest to swallow. I've come to believe that children do to others what the people they're supposed to trust did to them or showed them was acceptable.
@@allthe1
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
It is a natural reaction for a child to hit someone in response to an action they do not like. They don’t have to have been hit themselves for this to happen.
I assume you also believe that spanking is wrong under all circumstances. I do not. So we likely will not agree on this subject. You can see my video on spanking for my perspective.
Thank you again for your comments.
@@MommyAnswerLady You assumed right, and I would add that neither do I think that verbal threats, shaking, shoving, and pinching is right in any situation other that self-defense against grown, threatening people, which small children are not for obvious reasons.
On the other side, I do not think it is easy to break away from these habits when this is what has been done to us at a very young age. I think it is the hardest thing one has to overcome if one wants fully trusting relationship with their children.
I do not agree that violence is a natural reaction. I believe the two are linked, and I was originally looking for people who recognize that. Somehow, I keep stumbling up on people who wish to correct children. I don't think it's a bad idea, and one needs to be prepared to deal with this. That's just not what I'm looking for myself. To be honest, I find it disappointing how very rarely the understanding of the children's perspective seems to be the focus of attention.
I will continue my search, thank you for your attention.
@@allthe1 Well, we do agree on one thing. Verbal threats, pinching, shaking, etc are unacceptable behavior. No child should be treated that way.
The perspective of the child is a main theme in learning how to properly teach and train a child to behave. Understanding their reasons for bad behavior is key to knowing how to remedy it.
That does not mean everything we do to help them learn to behave is something they will like in the moment.