@@AutisticJesusGamingthat's the best part my brother is knee deep in debt because of loans when he pays it off first thing he does is get another expensive loan. I tell him if he stopped and saved there'd be a whole lot less interest.
@@AutisticJesusGamingI find it funny how loan is being seen as default way of financing today. If you plan your finance good, no need for any credit card or loan.
Can we praise her for not being condescending towards other possible ideas despite her own opinions. She is so calm and her ideas have a lot of thought in them- we need more people like *this*
The calmest lady in the world, literally using facts and logic to support her opinion while still being respectful. The shining beacon for women kind cause the feminist extremist and somehow vegan being represented by the vegan teacher are kinda making things worse and worse. Seriously though, why is that vegan teacher dominate how some people now view vegan? Her name having Karen and hairstyle resembling the stereotypical Karen really doesn't help.
You must be a woman, you never considered the reason behind he red-flagging a pre-nup. Men must protect themselves against any and all feminists, you are universally vampiristic.
Nah. It's a red flag if a women doesn't sign it. It's no secret that courts favor women in divorces. Pretty strange that women never want to sign it because they know it will almost always benefit them more
Nah, prenup is a necessity for a man in these times. and "it depends on how much money you have" just proves it right. Merged finanses are good for a man that begs to be broke.
This *only* counts for debt acrewed before the prenup, if you marry someone with a prenup, and they have a seperate account, but you're legally of their direct family. You *will be* held just as accountable as any other death in the family. In both, prenup or not, you can deny the debt and deny accepting the debt for them. (Unless you're a cosigner. In which case, none of this matters, you're responsible)
I disagree because most people have a wrong idea about what a prenup is. Even if they're both starting together, a prenup is needed. A prenup is not only about the protection of pre-marital assets but you could also define in a prenup what would be considered as marital assets and individual assets in the future ( even if right now you don't own it) . In a sense, it's a good way to plan out your current and future finances. Moreover, if you have separate accounts and one of you can't pay some debts or has financial problems, at least the other spouses's individual assets would be protected instead of both of you losing everything
If you are set to inherit a fortune in future it makes sense to have a prenup, even if you are currently broke with no assets. Its not fair for a divorcing spouse to benefit from their partner's inheritance.
What did she first say. It would depend on how much money he has. She originally said it’s a red flag to sign one. Why would it be a red flag for me to want to keep what I came in the relationship with 😂😂. It’s my shit. It’s a red flag that I wanna protect it. That’s wild.
She’s right about everything except credit. It’s vital to build credit, don’t rack up expenses and pay your bill on time. Higher tier cards get you free transactions and air miles. Just be a responsible consumer. How are you going to have an ideal down payment on a house if you have no credit history… not everyone enjoys carrying a huge sack of cash for every big payment.
I’m with you woozie, credit isn’t that hard to use correctly. Just treat it like a debit card, only buy things that you already have the funds and it’s fine. Credit cards are only bad for people who view credit cards as infinite money.
Building a credit history is an American system, it’s very difficult to scape from it, but possible. Fortunately, most countries around the world don't have this system, and debit cards are more popular.
Credit isn’t a scam unless you’re maxing everything out and not paying by the due date. The solution is just don’t do something like that. I also don’t know how that woman is going to buy a house if she doesn’t use credit cards, because she will have no credit scire
@@Meekox I never said that it was a sole reason, but some people do marry just for money and it's basically an insurance. It depends on circumstances and who is involved plus it's their lives not ours
@@Meekox it really depends on the situation if their on the same level of finances and theirs trust well of course do whatever you want , but let's say one has more then the other unless there's Hella trust it just isn't a good idea
@@esthetic0516 a prenup basically means that if a divorce were to occur, which is very likely nowadays, then each side would keep everything they listed in their prenup agreement which both have to sign premarriage. For example if someone is purposely marrying a rich person for their money, a prenup would stop the greedy jerk from taking half of the rich persons money upon their divorce
Yea right she tryna use a mans money she literally said a man wanting prenup is red flag how tho ? He just wants to make sure if it doesn’t work out he doesn’t get stripped out all of his money like wtf 🤣 how is it red flag
@@tonyguwop47 listen to her idiot. She said if y’all are starting out together it should be merged finances, that means if you’re already successful financially BEFORE the marriage she’s ok with a prenup
@@tonyguwop47 if you're the woman and you've stood by him in tough times while he's working and you're holding it down at home it's not a huge ask to get half of what you've both built together.
Shes realistic and doesn't put too much judgement on people who reasonably cut corners. Like I love how she says that IT DEPENDS... coz everything is circumstancial. In her version, she's really understanding and good for her. I don't save as much as I should, so I kinda hope whoever I end up with does so I have to adapt with them.
@@Lucci136 i don’t really either never had one. But I’m hoping shes exaggerating. I do know that some credit cards have some percentage rates you have to pay
@@Gloomyraindrop There are numerous countries that use a Credit Score type system. Technically you dont NEED one in the US if you plan to pay cash. However, the Netherlands, UK, Canada, Australia, and China all have some form of "Credit Score".
@@SugoiTravelReviews I know right? And the majority of basic credit cards have no annual fee and gives 1% cash back. So it’s like getting a 1% discount on everything you buy.
@@SugoiTravelReviews not to mention extended warranty and purchase protection that a lot of cards have. If you have the cash, then just pay back the card with said cash.
@@Lucci136 you're neglecting her age, credit card interest rates where way higher back then, she clearly made the decision to stick to cash a while back. You know nothing about finances or the history of them.
We got married at City Hall then had a backyard BBQ with some family and close friends. Almost 20 years later still happily married and still have no regrets.
We need to remove the stigma from prenups. It protects everyone, and while nobody goes into a marriage intending for it to fail, a prenup made when you both liked each other is much more likely to be fair and can help expedite separation if the marriage does happen to fail. I mean, really. "Oh no with a piece of paper I've successfully removed materialism from the relationship and so now the relationship is entirely about the relationship. The horror!"
Hold on this is inaccurate.. There is a stigma against prenups, but its not entirely unfair or unjust.. the idea that someone would intend for a marriage to fail and take money is not only incredibly rare, but also a whole matter of court with divorce. So let's agree to ignore that for now. nothing in marriage means that you *ONLY* take 50/50.. a divorcee lists and finds agreement to the important assets of a household. Between two mature people, this never turns out in bad favor for either person. (Unless both people are literally near homeless, but that's not a problem of seperation) Yes, a prenup will make getting someone out of your life faster. But it also costs with huge risks as well. prenups are signed before a marriage.. if the people are inequel in income, they might already have a house, cars, vacation plans or investment funds or whatever.. stuff that the other hasn't helped with. That's reasonable and that's already something discussed in the 50/50 split at divorce. But if the person with a higher income suddenly drops their income at the time of divorce (depression, trauma, injury, ect) than legally, the person who exits the marriage in the higher income level, takes assets that they wouldn't have contributed more to.. not by choice, but by law.. if two people equally have similar incomes and assets, a prenup will do nothing a legal divorce does. There is a benefit to victims of abuse, allowing them to take capital or assets. I agree with that. But the ability to become the abuser is stronger with a prenup, than it is without. Assuming a marriage has an abuser, the person with higher income can also take more.. prenups only benefit large financial relationships in fairness which is what this lady said.
@TheKiroshi a prenup will protect a lot of men from being taken advantage of bg women and their lawyers in a devorce so it seems fair enough for me. If a woman got married to an abuser that's a minority of cases and shouldn't risk a lot of men's assets for it.
@hasan fadel -- you know with a response like that, I hope you're gay cuz there seems to be no mention of anyone other than the man there. Does it not take 2 to tango?
I think it all depends on the type of marriage you're going. I found a lot of men wanting to have a stay at home wife that would welcome him with home cooked dinner and do all the house labor. If a man wants woman to spend all her life supporting him then it's unreasonable to expect prenup. Should he cheat on her with much younger woman down the line, she is left with nothing. Little chance to get even moderately paying job, no savings for pension. Same with the stay at home husband. If it's mutual decision that one partner spend their life doing unpaid labor for the other, prenup is selfish. Otherwise, sure, why not.
but isn’t the point of marriage saying “what’s mine is yours” to each other? like why not just be partners instead at that point. and if you say it’s about taxes - that only works when one person is making more then the other person, so that break is only benefiting one person especially if they have a prenup. idk i’m not married and don’t really plan to just my random thoughts.
@@KobeLoverTatum i may be wrong about this, but i was told prenups protect the spouse. If one were to die, the prenup would list everything the spouse is entitled to and protect them against debt (if the person they married had debt)
There were nine people at my parents second wedding. My parents, me (flower girl), the pastor who was also the best man's father, the best man (who is a professional wedding photographer and did it free), the maid of honor (mom's sister), my dad's parents, and my mom's dad. It was held in a public park where my parents had their first date. And the "reception" was at a local restaurant where my grandpa paid as his wedding present. My parents saved on not having a venue and used it to pay for a nice honeymoon cruise.
I guess It's mostly sentimental value, you only really get to do that once (usually) so why not make it truly special. Nothing really matters anyway, no one will remember you, me, or anyone else reading this after a couple hundred years so we might as well make things worthwhile. Do what works for you though.
Not even a wedding... My boyfriend and I have good financial stability, but if we ever get married we agreed that the only thing we'll spend money on is a lawyer from the municipality, and then we'll go to a nearby coffee shop and eat cake.
@@lonkwuzhere4433 Sadly, there are not enough records of ordinary people, even though we make up most of the people now and historically. There are so many people fascinated with how ordinary people lived throughout history, but we usually only have a few historical accounts of common folk.
I think it's good to get married at a court house, have it on paper, and THEN save up for a big fancy ceremony that you can invite your whole family to. At least then you can make sure the usual bad wedding disasters like one of them running off doesn't happen.
@@pinkrebellionxyz1567 sure. But if you can get some tax benefits from being married, waiting months and months and months for a wedding is pointless. Get it all done on paper so you can get the benefits and then have a wedding. Nobody there needs to know you’re already married.
@@joeyjackson5075 that why I said “just” getting married at the courthouse is boring. Obviously have the ceremony after, I’ve never had a big party so I’d want my wedding to be a huge celebration with close family and friends
I don't see how. If you can't figure out how to merge your finances to both people's satisfactions, how are you going to make anything else in the marriage work?
@@Haylla2008 says the woman who is subconsciously and secretly planning to take the man's house and his money in the future whenever she who loses interest yeah not going to listen to you😂😂😂
@@Haylla2008 so you just clarified why didn't you reply to the other guy. If you took some effort to type that, might as well have denied that that is not what you're looking to do in the future
Having a Prenup shows how responsible you are with your finances. It anticipates loss and protects people from it, that's all. No matter how good things seem, after marriage, things can change and you should have your rights protected. If one of the partners is offended by getting a Prenup, that's the real red flag.
I can understand being offended by getting a prenup. There isn’t any wrong with getting offended because it does question your relationship in the future and to be truthful people just don’t like thinking about that. Of course mature relationship wise it’s understandable, but especially if you both come from different backgrounds financially it can get a bit tricky. I myself definitely want a prenup if I get married. I love my boyfriend, but you never know what’s down the line and I am afraid of financial instability afterwards. I want to go into a relationship supporting myself and come out the same way. I do not ever want someone or myself relying on the other for my finances. It’s a harsh situation on the relationship, but like you said yourself you need to protect your own rights, finances, and belongings. I do not want to pay alimony to someone I want nothing more to do with.
It all depends on communication and honesty. When you’re marrying someone you’re building a relationship/lives together. Some people see prenups as a 0 responsibility get out of jail free card. But that’s what communication is for. Some people are pressured by family for one, and others have lifelong assets they would like to protect. It’s better to have an open conversation and mutual understanding as to why. A lot of the time prenups are seen, through movies, and shows, as heavily one-sided arrangements, but it can be a mutual choice
@@mrOGbobbyjohnson There are many women I know who are capable of supporting themselves without the need of a male. Please go cry about your misogynistic viewpoints typed from your mother’s basement into another comment section. ❤️
@@cirruscries I'd be more offended that a girl would get offended by having a prenup... Kinda sounds like they want the opportunity to take your stuff if it doesn't work out.
@@Zyphent A prenup is not weird 💀 A prenup ensures that legally, they cannot take your stuff if you divorce. What’s weird is not wanting a prenup. Also, without a prenup the state can decide how you split your assets. A prenup means you decide.
@@DeathnoteBBIf there is a prenup, there should be a clause to compensate if the other becomes a staying at home parent. Becoming a full time parent for 10 or 15 years is basically destroying your career and reducing your access to financial independence.
I think this just proves how there are so many little things that you have to talk about with your partner before getting married; cause all of these things can be either a red flag or a green flag depending on the person's views, wants, and needs c:
The only reason to not have a credit card is if you are habitually not paying all of the balance off before they charge interest on what's left; otherwise, it's a good way to build your credit score.
@@XisoLate credit cards are honestly one of the worst parts of modern society. Why do I need to prove that I can perpetually pay off tiny loans just to buy a house? Whilst if I save up enough cash, I can just buy it out right. It doesn't make sense. It has never made sense. Credit is a scam. I refuse to conform
@@callmestumps6954 You can do it that way and save up the cash. No one is forcing people to get a credit card. The're other ways to establish credit. What society doesn't want is to give a group of people loans for vehicles and houses where the balances are unlikely paid in full that month would then be reposessed three months later.
@@callmestumps6954 I see Credit cards as a safety net. Why would I risk my own money when I can risk someone elses money? If my debit card gets used for fraud or if i get scammed, I am out that money immediately. Sure I can probably get it back eventually, but that process can take months to get resolved. During that time that money it tied up and unavailable to me to use. Hopefully I have extra money in savings or other accounts I can use in the meantime. If my credit card get used for fraud. I still got my money in my account. I haven't lost any money. Just that line of credit is tied up until the fraud is resolved. I also have a big credit card company working to get the fraud resolved as it is their money on the line.
No credit card, little to no credit 💀 Edit: Having a credit card and paying off your debit regularly on time is one of the easiest ways to build credit.
Yeah people forget it’s a two way problem. No credit without a credit card, however that’s a complete social construct just to get credit card companies more money, so you cant win
@@DeathnoteBB money itself is a social construct. We live in this society so we need to play by its rules. The issue here seems to be that she doesn't know how to manage her credit cards. I use cards for everything. Builds points, cash back rewards, and I just pay it off at the end of each mo th. If I make a large purchase I tend to use a payment plan with a no interest option even though I have the cash on hand. Builds credit, no credit card debt.
I have a credit card, but I don't actually use it for that? if that makes sense? credit scores were never a concern of mine because I only spend money that is already mine
I’d prefer if my partner and I get a prenup. It protects the both of us and gives us peace of mind about finances. My parents are in a happy marriage with a prenup because they wanted to remove a possible fight about money.
@@etfreima2080It depends on what’s in the prenup. Prenups are basically just contracts that state the consequence to a hypothetical scenario. “If ‘A’ happens, then you get ‘B’ and I get ‘C’.”
You don't owe intrest on the card if you just pay it off in full. Keep a credit card, treat it like a debit. And just ask another lawyer to represent you and look over the prenup so it protects the both of you. You can still merge finances, just define in the prenup what happens if one of y'all cheat etc. Marriage is a contract with financial implications, I'd _never_ join a contract without being clear on the fineprint, the prenup is the fineprint.
@@rhiesa3945 its not a coinflip, its a learned skill. And sure, if you can't handle it don't have it, but acting like it's automatic debt is a straight up lie. You can cauntion people on the pitfalls of something without missinformation.
@@ricebeansrockroll882 I think you’re forgetting than some people were never taught about it properly and only have the people around them to base their opinions off
@@yuri_mony989 I love the irony that you can't see that the thing you are acting pissy about is the reason I wrote the comment. People don't know these things, that's _why_ I pointed the missinformation out. And no, it's not a cointoss if creditcards cause debt. It's a skill. Talking about it is the first step to giving people the tools and skills to maneage their finances. Spreading the idea that it's predestined to cause debt does not, that's fatalism and the absolute opposite of empowering people around money. I grew up poor, we didn't always have enough to eat, I'm in a better place now but I'm still not rich or even middle class. Having control over the little money I do have over though makes a huge differene, and I'm pretty passionate about others getting the same oppertunity. So yeah, I'm going to keep pointing out missinformation like this, shit that _hurt_ people financially.
It actually doesn't. Not over straight cash / bank accounts. Credit cards make money off of interest, and anytime it takes more than 1 pay period to pay off the full balance, you are losing money. Companies will offer "rewards" for credit levels, but these will *NEVER* equate to the money your paying them via interest. The amount if money these companies set as goals will always be higher than how much you can possibly make. Large investments into say, a mortgage, a house.. moving across the country may be worth the interest you acrew over the cost of the investment. (Moving to a better employing city for example) but the ideal situation is to save enough money to afford that without a credit card. Thata not always possible and in those cases, the lesser amount of cash you have, the more disproportionately large the interest is versus your entire account.. Credit cards do no provide benefits. This is a marketing tactic and nothing more.
@@TheKiroshi if you pay it off before intrest starts to build up, you only get the rewards. The reason they are able to offer the rewards is because many people do not use credit cards responsibly and end up owing interest. They are a hook to draw people in, but they can be to your benefit if you are cautious. I have never once had to pay a cent of interest, because I use the cards as if they were money from my checking account. Purchase goes on card, gets paid off immediately, and I get the 5% cash back from using the card without any interest. Using it like this, you do gain benefits over just using cash or debit.
@@TheKiroshi you are objectively wrong. Get a card with no annual fee. Use it as a debit card (pay it off in full every month) as the poster said and get a card with cash back, you are literally saving at a minimum most likely 1% on most purchases
@@TheKiroshi that’s exactly why they said paying off in full. Standard interest free period is around 56 days, but the benefits that credit cards can provide are another bonus. If you’re irresponsible and lending money you don’t/won’t have then that’s when they become dangerous, but in the hands of a responsible person they can be amazing benefits wise.
Honestly the prenup response is gold. I feel like so many men think they need the same level of protection as Millionaires and Football players but if you're both starting off on the same level 🤷♀️
I’m really sad about how expensive weddings are now! I’m still getting married in a courthouse first, but a wedding for me is more of a family reunion and having the families meet.
Look, back yard and pay anyone or ask anyone you know who is a Self-uniting, or Quaker hehe 😜 Anyone who cares will do it for free. Pay as much as you would any birthday party 🥳 and I’d never buy a dress over 50 bucks id really look for a 30 dollar dress if my man proposed.
@@DeathnoteBB So that implies credit cards are not inherently bad. Credit cards are bad if you are not responsible. That is a comment on the person not credit cards in general. Hammers are bad if you give it to a murderer. But hammers are not inherently evil in themselves. There is a significant difference between "credit cards are bad" and "credit cards are bad if you are irresponsible". These two are completely different and unrelated statements. The discussion is are credit cards bad in themselves, which the answer is no. But then coming and adding "if you are responsible" is irrelevant to the discussion. Its like talking about how apples taste create, and you responding but bananas suck. Sure bananas suck, but we are talking about apples. "If responsible" is the banana.
Building credit is essential. You can build credit without a credit card but it is much harder and you need credit prior to getting a mortgage or car payment that affords you said opportunity.
I’ll always remember my ma telling me that I need to sign a prenup whatever happens, in her past she had been cheated out of lots of money not from a romantic partner but still people she trusted- she taught me that whatever happens I need money to survive and have a roof over my head.
My husband and I married while we were in high school and had a kid shortly after before I turned 18. Because we were starting off like that so young, during a time when COVID had just shut down so many jobs, my husband offered to be a stay at home dad while I worked. Honnestly, I feel asking for a prenup in that situation would have been a horrible thing to do. Me expecting him to be a stay at home dad puts him in a situation where he is throwing away his chance to get his foot down in a career because he is dedicating all his time to our children. In some situations, it is definitely a good call. But it can really be an innapropiate decision in others. Especially if you've established a healthy way to team up with your partner.
if you don’t get a prenup and you get divorced for ANY reason, including because you both have mutually decided it isn’t working and the situation is entirely amicable, you’ll be subject to the state’s laws about splitting finances and you might not like those.
I like that she explained herself on the prenup. A prenup is understandable if one partner has WAY more than the other. If you're both going in with the same amount of money/stuff, merged is completely understandable.
@@shaivjoshi4063 No it gives the one with higher income any assets that both contributed to an advantage. So if the partner that contributed more becomes the lower earner before divorce they are screwed.
I think over the next 20 years prenups will become the norm. So many people get their livelihoods taken away because a partner is only in it for the money. Without a prenup, your partner is entitled to half no matter when the item was bought. With a prenup, what's yours is yours unless bought during the marriage.
However, it is a massive sign of distrust in your partner. If you feel you need to protect that, then you shouldn't get married in the first place. Only when your relationship is founded on trust should you even consider it.
@@projectstart5522 Eh, it's not about trust. Betrayal comes from the ones you least expect. It's stupid to get into a contract with someone that benefits from breaking it. Also no matter how much you trust someone there is always a small chance to get hurt.
The marriage ceremony can be anywhere because that is meant for the couple to be somehow officially joining but so many people think weddings are a waste of money when the point of a wedding is celebration with family and friends. They can get too expensive but my family always did weddings on the cheap and we still had a fantastic time!
Agreed completely. Honestly, if I marry someone, I'm just getting a pretty white dress, going to the courthouse and having a BBQ party with close family and friends afterwards. Like, wedding parties can be fun, don't get me wrong (I remember my cousin literally got a samba school percursion battery to play in her wedding just for the hell of it), but it's too expensive and there's way too much noise and people for me (plus the pressure of inviting ALL of your extended family just because it's a big event. Like, fuck them, I don't like half of my more distant relatives and at best I'm indifferent towards most of the other half). With the money that I'd spend organising the whole ceremony and after-party, and catering to all the guests for a fancy wedding, I could do the party of the century with the people I actually enjoy being with. Also, out of like, 5 family and family friend's weddings I attended, only ONE had actually good food; I don't know why but every single wedding buffet service here has mid food at best. Worse still when they try to make something "fancy" but you either end up with something that tastes horrible, something cheap that's plated fancy and that's expensive, or both; drives me nuts. If I'm having a party to celebrate my love and union with someone, the least I want it's good food to celebrate, dang it '^'
your story kinda goes against the point that too many people think weddings are a waste of money. If weddings were unnesicarily thought were expensive they would want something cheap/not do any celebration
That’s ur opinion. Every man I date I make sure he understands pretty much immediately what he’s signing up for and what I expect of him. I’ve never had a man that I’m dating disagree with me on this, or if they did then the relationship went no further. We all have different preferences and wants/needs. We get to choose our partners and have our own priorities which is what makes us human. What doesn’t work for u might work for someone else. And just cuz it didn’t work out for u doesn’t mean it wouldn’t for someone else. Many women will not date someone who will sign a prenup, like myself. And that’s fine. Just means ur not compatible. And no, i don’t plan on taking them for all they got?? In any relationship I’ve been in I’m usually the one who is financially better off anyways. If I’m going to have ur children and start a family, which is all I want and care about is to find a good husband/father, well then I need to feel secure and never fear my financial situation collapsing because the marriage didn’t work out or the guy couldn’t stay loyal. Since nowadays there is such a high possibility of the marriage failing so my #1 priority will always will be my children and I will NEVER set myself up to become a struggling single mom in case the father decides to neglect his family or abandon us entirely. Probably another reason why I feel this way is because I’m usually the one on the receiving end of being taken for all I’ve got. Maybe not in ur time. But in my generation, many men are mooches and are looking for a woman to fill the role of their “mommy” instead of wife. If a man loves u enough and trusts u enough and has FAITH in ur relationship then there would be no reason in his eyes to sign a prenup.
@@sumbunniii8721 We're probably about the same age if I had to guess based on what you've said. 70-80% of marriages ending in divorce are initiated by women, 90% if they're college educated Why? Because SHE gets to decide (even when they might be doing their best). Rarely will a man end a marriage, it'll only destroy him. In your own response you based the entire argument on an unfaithful man but we KNOW from the data that men are not leaving relationships and not cheating even close to as much (VAST majority just look at the data don't take my word for it DYOR). Not only that, but when a man decides the same thing about his woman (neglecting children, not paying her dues, not doing chores, being lazy etc), he STILL has to pay... even though SHES the problem. And guess what? If he can't pay he goes to jail/prison (indentured servitude, one of the few forms of slavery still alive today) and if a women doesn't pay, she gets government assistance! So, even if you didn't have a job and your man left, you wouldn't be struggling, the government pays for you! That's why so many women do it! At no point is there an advantage for a man to get married. He gains nothing but liability. The woman, on the other hand, is completely taken care of A-Z. Women are almost never the primary earners in a household. And your mooch comment is hilarious. I've been used for free dates countless times, free drinks countless times, only to never hear from them again or to hear they're sleeping with someone else. Soooo many girls have a "roster" that they use to get attention and keep guys in friend zones. Only 1% of men can say that. In a study done last year, a male model got 9 matches on tinder, an obese woman got 300 in the same timeframe. You'll never be alone and not provided for, you don't know what loneliness really is. 33% of men haven't had sex EVER in their life. Then, when he does get a girl, she expects him to pay for everything, work all day, come home and provide and protect her, and also do the cooking and cleaning? Women have a grocery list of things they need in a man. Quit acting like life is hard for you compared to man. It's not even close. You're born with value and marriage is setup for you to succeed no matter what. It's not even close to the same for a man. If you disagree, what are three advantages a man gains by getting married? Especially without a prenup. Also, don't ever expect to marry a rich man without a prenup. He's too smart for that.
Her thoughts on Prenup are so refreshing. My girlfriend wants a Prenup specifically because she will inherit her family business later, and I completely understand and support that decision. A prenup can be a good thing under certain circumstances
If I were to have a man, I would want to get married at the courthouse. It’s cheap, you offend everyone because you invited no-one. And true love isn’t a wedding, it’s spending your life with somebody.
True, but a ceremony celebration is nice. If people are jealous they should understand there was a limit etc. Plus I’d like it to be memorable not just signing paperwork. Seems a tad boring to just have a court wedding, funny if you end up in the same court for a divorce or prison sentence😂
I'm a woman and I have suggested a prenup to my boyfriend who wants to get married next year 😆 Not because I expect it will end in divorce but also a way to show him I'm not in it for the money. If anything, our fortune is for the kids. Also don't touch my pension 🤣
The prenup thing had me worried for a bit, but I can understand that togetherness. Cus if you build wealth together, your enabling each other to thrive, it’s not just you when you have a partner by your side
@@adamdelorenzo5407 No they don't, not necessarily. A prenup is not one specific form you fill out. A prenup agreement is to lay out the conditions for how you want finances to be handled in the event of a divorce, to make potential divorce proceedings easier and less costly after the fact, but the couple can stipulate any conditions they want in there. So that might indeed be to protect assets from before the marriage, but it might also include provisions for any future earnings, possible inheritance, finances for children from a previous marriage, whatever, really. You can also have a prenup state that in the event of a no-fault divorce, everything is split 50-50, so that if things go ugly, neither party can contest it or try to unfairly get more money out of their partner in an actual divorce. So in that case, if neither have significant prior earnings and one side is pushing for a prenup for a guaranteed 50-50, it might be a red flag, if that party ends up having far less assets down the line. Depends on the prenup.
Credit card thing is a grey flag. She talked about putting a down payment on a house, but if he doesn’t have a credit card, he doesn’t have a good credit score most likely to do it.
Having no credit card is a red flag for me because we need a credit score in this society to get anything. I have 3 credit cards, pay them off in full nearly every month, and my credit score is rounding 800. He needs a good credit score so we can get approved for future credit cards, better mortgages, better interest rates. I literally told my now husband that I couldn't marry him unless he had a credit card.
@@krn2683 these days student loans like FAFSA also impact your credit, this is how I was able to get my current credit card as a college student since i had an already established credit score.
I like that she thinks critically about each question. For me, that is a green flag.
She’s older she knows wassup
SHE SAID NOT OWNING A CREDIT CRD AND PAUING IN CASH IS A GREEN FLAG SHES NEVER GONNA GET A LOAN EVER
Here here.
@@AutisticJesusGamingthat's the best part my brother is knee deep in debt because of loans when he pays it off first thing he does is get another expensive loan. I tell him if he stopped and saved there'd be a whole lot less interest.
@@AutisticJesusGamingI find it funny how loan is being seen as default way of financing today. If you plan your finance good, no need for any credit card or loan.
Can we praise her for not being condescending towards other possible ideas despite her own opinions. She is so calm and her ideas have a lot of thought in them- we need more people like *this*
Yups I especially like her opinion in prenup, it's not a necessarily bad thing and does had it is own advantage
The calmest lady in the world, literally using facts and logic to support her opinion while still being respectful. The shining beacon for women kind cause the feminist extremist and somehow vegan being represented by the vegan teacher are kinda making things worse and worse.
Seriously though, why is that vegan teacher dominate how some people now view vegan? Her name having Karen and hairstyle resembling the stereotypical Karen really doesn't help.
You must be a woman, you never considered the reason behind he red-flagging a pre-nup. Men must protect themselves against any and all feminists, you are universally vampiristic.
I think a prenup is smart mainly because marriages mostly end in divorce nowadays so in doing so protects your assets
That’s the bare minimum
This woman is the most sensible partner anyone could ask for, love how she's smart, reasonable, and not shallow.
Yes, but a sensible partner is more common than you think. Depending on your partner's life choice and thus where you meet them
She’s a good digger
@@UmuPadoru that's completely true but most of the people that influencers talk to are just vapid nothing humans. This was a nice change of pace.
She’s not smart because she’s against credit cards. Very ignorant.
@@nightmare4122 to you and gordon yes it is but you don't need a credit card to do it.
She’s literally the biggest green flag on earth. She seems so sweet 🥹
Exept the prenup part.
Literally the biggest
Bro seems to have a crush.
I approve of it, go for it bro 🗿👍
She did say prenups depend. She thinks critically and is clearly open to changing her views. Gotta love it
Nah. It's a red flag if a women doesn't sign it. It's no secret that courts favor women in divorces. Pretty strange that women never want to sign it because they know it will almost always benefit them more
@@JewJitSuSixty9 😂😂 bum men are now taking women's money that don't sign prenups, there's been several high profile women that have dealt with this.
@@JewJitSuSixty9 she fumbled and clearly didn't know exactly what she was talking about, but from her speech it was clear that she's open to new info
Nah, prenup is a necessity for a man in these times.
and "it depends on how much money you have" just proves it right.
Merged finanses are good for a man that begs to be broke.
@@Artliker1234 Did Jhonny Depp case teach you nothing?
Prenups also help if your partner dies, credit companies can't come after you for their debt
this!!
This *only* counts for debt acrewed before the prenup, if you marry someone with a prenup, and they have a seperate account, but you're legally of their direct family. You *will be* held just as accountable as any other death in the family.
In both, prenup or not, you can deny the debt and deny accepting the debt for them. (Unless you're a cosigner. In which case, none of this matters, you're responsible)
@@TheKiroshi you can actually refuse all debt if you don’t accept any inheritance, con being is that you can’t receive any belongings of theirs.
I didn't know that. Thanks for the info
yeah, but if he doesn't use credit cards, and neither does she, then obviously that won't be a problem
her answer for prenup makes sense. Like she even said, well if theyre both starting out together financially, then no prenup is needed. Smart woman.
I disagree because most people have a wrong idea about what a prenup is. Even if they're both starting together, a prenup is needed. A prenup is not only about the protection of pre-marital assets but you could also define in a prenup what would be considered as marital assets and individual assets in the future ( even if right now you don't own it) . In a sense, it's a good way to plan out your current and future finances. Moreover, if you have separate accounts and one of you can't pay some debts or has financial problems, at least the other spouses's individual assets would be protected instead of both of you losing everything
@@judys5864 Good point, hadnt thought about the debt part of it. That is good to learn.
If you are set to inherit a fortune in future it makes sense to have a prenup, even if you are currently broke with no assets.
Its not fair for a divorcing spouse to benefit from their partner's inheritance.
You can’t skip prenup because after some time your affort will be halved and you will be probably not so happy about it
What did she first say. It would depend on how much money he has. She originally said it’s a red flag to sign one. Why would it be a red flag for me to want to keep what I came in the relationship with 😂😂. It’s my shit. It’s a red flag that I wanna protect it. That’s wild.
She’s right about everything except credit. It’s vital to build credit, don’t rack up expenses and pay your bill on time. Higher tier cards get you free transactions and air miles. Just be a responsible consumer. How are you going to have an ideal down payment on a house if you have no credit history… not everyone enjoys carrying a huge sack of cash for every big payment.
Credit is a scam that everyone fell for.
I’m with you woozie, credit isn’t that hard to use correctly. Just treat it like a debit card, only buy things that you already have the funds and it’s fine. Credit cards are only bad for people who view credit cards as infinite money.
Building a credit history is an American system, it’s very difficult to scape from it, but possible. Fortunately, most countries around the world don't have this system, and debit cards are more popular.
@@Dani.Torres well they are in America aren’t they do it’s important
Credit isn’t a scam unless you’re maxing everything out and not paying by the due date. The solution is just don’t do something like that. I also don’t know how that woman is going to buy a house if she doesn’t use credit cards, because she will have no credit scire
Truly the prenup thing is based on circumstances especially if you own your own business
I think that shouldn't be the point of a prenup. What if either one has a successful business during the marriage anyway.
@@Meekox I never said that it was a sole reason, but some people do marry just for money and it's basically an insurance. It depends on circumstances and who is involved plus it's their lives not ours
@@Meekox it really depends on the situation if their on the same level of finances and theirs trust well of course do whatever you want , but let's say one has more then the other unless there's Hella trust it just isn't a good idea
I'm very young, can you elaborate?
@@esthetic0516 a prenup basically means that if a divorce were to occur, which is very likely nowadays, then each side would keep everything they listed in their prenup agreement which both have to sign premarriage. For example if someone is purposely marrying a rich person for their money, a prenup would stop the greedy jerk from taking half of the rich persons money upon their divorce
She’s the real green flag
Nope
@@Lucci136 yep
@@Lucci136 said the red person 💀
Nope
@@Himothy192 😂
She needs to be a life counselor for young adults who are new to adult life
That is called parents some suck though
This woman is the true green flag. Idk why it’s not common anymore to find people like her who are calm, critical thinkers and are open minded
it's still pretty common man, just not online.
@@hopelessromantic3786 true
It’s pretty common as long as you aren’t in the US
get off the internet, there are plenty of women who think just like this.
I love this woman. She has her own mind and uses logic and is not indoctrinated.
What the fuck is that supposed to mean
In love with a literal pink pink pink oink
Indoctrinated by who/what? Most women aren't Indoctrinated, lmao.
@@federicoanzola2785 .___. Lol this guy
@@federicoanzola2785 die alone
This is somebody who actually thinks before she reacts, it’s wild that it’s so rare now for people to do that
I don't think it's that rare. The ones that react worse are just more noticeable
Yea especially in a woman too. 😎
@@0Free._Alien._Abductions0 exactly and we put them on a pedestal
I don’t think it’s rare
The internet just amplifies the bad ones
@@sergiofelix2770 uh
Holy shit is that an actual human being that will talk things out critically and logically for the future
If he is rich and doesnt wanna share his money with a woman who could easily take half is not a red flag, it is smart and necessary.
yup agree, and that was exactly her point!
(she said if both people are starting out together, THEN it should be merged finances.)
God damn, this woman needs to raise every generation that came after her. Love her.
I mean it depends on some other views so let's slow down a bit
it's a fucking TH-cam short 😂😂 relax. have you ever met a woman in real life?
Yea right she tryna use a mans money she literally said a man wanting prenup is red flag how tho ? He just wants to make sure if it doesn’t work out he doesn’t get stripped out all of his money like wtf 🤣 how is it red flag
@@tonyguwop47 listen to her idiot. She said if y’all are starting out together it should be merged finances, that means if you’re already successful financially BEFORE the marriage she’s ok with a prenup
@@tonyguwop47 if you're the woman and you've stood by him in tough times while he's working and you're holding it down at home it's not a huge ask to get half of what you've both built together.
Shes realistic and doesn't put too much judgement on people who reasonably cut corners. Like I love how she says that IT DEPENDS... coz everything is circumstancial. In her version, she's really understanding and good for her. I don't save as much as I should, so I kinda hope whoever I end up with does so I have to adapt with them.
She seems like a very reasonable woman we need more people like her
Prenup is a interesting thing, if they have like 400% your amount or something crazy then I think it's warranted I suppose
She was honest and thoughtful in all her answers.
Stupid in regards to a prenup
Amen. Real realistic woman here..
She doesn't know how a credit card works...
@@Lucci136 i don’t really either never had one. But I’m hoping shes exaggerating. I do know that some credit cards have some percentage rates you have to pay
All the flags should be reversed lol
And her credit score is 5
@@joshuaweiss1249 nah not the first and the last one is debatable
There is nothing wrong with paying things with credit. In this life, you need a solid credit score to buy a home and a car
In America, yes.
@@Gloomyraindrop There are numerous countries that use a Credit Score type system. Technically you dont NEED one in the US if you plan to pay cash. However, the Netherlands, UK, Canada, Australia, and China all have some form of "Credit Score".
Don’t be a debt slave.
@@comradeeverclear4063 All totalitarian societies.
@@pearlsammo1638 being in debt is the best way to make money.
Open minded with thought out answers, respect the hell out of it
You only pay 28% interest if you don’t pay you balance at the end of the month 😭😭😭
That's most people.
IKR! I use CCs all the time to get rewards and always pay full balance. If you’re always paying cash, you won’t get any rewards! 💵
@@SugoiTravelReviews I know right? And the majority of basic credit cards have no annual fee and gives 1% cash back. So it’s like getting a 1% discount on everything you buy.
@@SugoiTravelReviews not to mention extended warranty and purchase protection that a lot of cards have. If you have the cash, then just pay back the card with said cash.
Man I see through this bs. All the banks collapsing, so they got bots advertise for em. 😶🌫️
We need more people like her fr
People who don't know anything about finances? Surely not
@@Lucci136 explain what was wrong with what she said
Most people are like this, you're chronically online
@@canonhayes9330 "I don't want to pay 28% interest" you don't pay 28% interest on a credit card
@@Lucci136 you're neglecting her age, credit card interest rates where way higher back then, she clearly made the decision to stick to cash a while back. You know nothing about finances or the history of them.
Love this lady!! I think this is the first time I've watched a video like this where I 100% agreed with everything the interviewee said.
girl had her priorities and reasoning thought out, hope she's living well
We got married at City Hall then had a backyard BBQ with some family and close friends. Almost 20 years later still happily married and still have no regrets.
As an introverted person I can't imagine going through one of those big lavish weddings.
You and your wife are the GOATs! Congrats on having a brain and using it!
That's what my fianceé and I are trying to do. I'm learning to hate our families as a result
That sounds like the perfect wedding. 🥰
Thats some FnF shit right there
We need to remove the stigma from prenups. It protects everyone, and while nobody goes into a marriage intending for it to fail, a prenup made when you both liked each other is much more likely to be fair and can help expedite separation if the marriage does happen to fail.
I mean, really. "Oh no with a piece of paper I've successfully removed materialism from the relationship and so now the relationship is entirely about the relationship. The horror!"
Hold on this is inaccurate..
There is a stigma against prenups, but its not entirely unfair or unjust.. the idea that someone would intend for a marriage to fail and take money is not only incredibly rare, but also a whole matter of court with divorce. So let's agree to ignore that for now.
nothing in marriage means that you *ONLY* take 50/50.. a divorcee lists and finds agreement to the important assets of a household. Between two mature people, this never turns out in bad favor for either person. (Unless both people are literally near homeless, but that's not a problem of seperation)
Yes, a prenup will make getting someone out of your life faster. But it also costs with huge risks as well.
prenups are signed before a marriage.. if the people are inequel in income, they might already have a house, cars, vacation plans or investment funds or whatever.. stuff that the other hasn't helped with. That's reasonable and that's already something discussed in the 50/50 split at divorce.
But if the person with a higher income suddenly drops their income at the time of divorce (depression, trauma, injury, ect) than legally, the person who exits the marriage in the higher income level, takes assets that they wouldn't have contributed more to.. not by choice, but by law..
if two people equally have similar incomes and assets, a prenup will do nothing a legal divorce does. There is a benefit to victims of abuse, allowing them to take capital or assets. I agree with that.
But the ability to become the abuser is stronger with a prenup, than it is without. Assuming a marriage has an abuser, the person with higher income can also take more.. prenups only benefit large financial relationships in fairness which is what this lady said.
@TheKiroshi a prenup will protect a lot of men from being taken advantage of bg women and their lawyers in a devorce so it seems fair enough for me. If a woman got married to an abuser that's a minority of cases and shouldn't risk a lot of men's assets for it.
@hasan fadel -- you know with a response like that, I hope you're gay cuz there seems to be no mention of anyone other than the man there. Does it not take 2 to tango?
I think it all depends on the type of marriage you're going. I found a lot of men wanting to have a stay at home wife that would welcome him with home cooked dinner and do all the house labor. If a man wants woman to spend all her life supporting him then it's unreasonable to expect prenup. Should he cheat on her with much younger woman down the line, she is left with nothing. Little chance to get even moderately paying job, no savings for pension. Same with the stay at home husband. If it's mutual decision that one partner spend their life doing unpaid labor for the other, prenup is selfish. Otherwise, sure, why not.
@@emberya9561 typically there are clauses in pre-nups that penalize infidelity and protect SaH spouses/parents
Yo this lady is a gem! A true rational thinker
This guy keeps on finding the most sane person answering very reasonable questions. Something thats very rare in 2023
I honestly don't get why people are so against prenups, it protects the both of you
It makes a lot of sense in a society where divorces are more common than not, definitely not where it's weird to even presume divorce.
but isn’t the point of marriage saying “what’s mine is yours” to each other? like why not just be partners instead at that point.
and if you say it’s about taxes - that only works when one person is making more then the other person, so that break is only benefiting one person especially if they have a prenup. idk i’m not married and don’t really plan to just my random thoughts.
@@That_BrownGirl I didn't think about it like that, that makes sense
@@KobeLoverTatum i may be wrong about this, but i was told prenups protect the spouse. If one were to die, the prenup would list everything the spouse is entitled to and protect them against debt (if the person they married had debt)
@@KobeLoverTatum there some government benefits to it
Agreed!!! Never understood why an expensive wedding is necessary.
There were nine people at my parents second wedding. My parents, me (flower girl), the pastor who was also the best man's father, the best man (who is a professional wedding photographer and did it free), the maid of honor (mom's sister), my dad's parents, and my mom's dad. It was held in a public park where my parents had their first date. And the "reception" was at a local restaurant where my grandpa paid as his wedding present. My parents saved on not having a venue and used it to pay for a nice honeymoon cruise.
I guess It's mostly sentimental value, you only really get to do that once (usually) so why not make it truly special.
Nothing really matters anyway, no one will remember you, me, or anyone else reading this after a couple hundred years so we might as well make things worthwhile.
Do what works for you though.
@@lonkwuzhere4433 that’s a sweet perspective. I totally get that.
Not even a wedding... My boyfriend and I have good financial stability, but if we ever get married we agreed that the only thing we'll spend money on is a lawyer from the municipality, and then we'll go to a nearby coffee shop and eat cake.
@@lonkwuzhere4433 Sadly, there are not enough records of ordinary people, even though we make up most of the people now and historically. There are so many people fascinated with how ordinary people lived throughout history, but we usually only have a few historical accounts of common folk.
Merging finances would be One of the worst ideas in marriage a couple could make in the history of marriage
I was dying on the prenup shit. LMFAOO 😂
Queen you dropped this 👑
A 2d image of a crown?
@@ripcraigbtwthisisiann5033 💀
No
No, she needs a dunce cap, not a crown.
@@nightmare4122 bro can't accept that he's stupid 💀
I think it's good to get married at a court house, have it on paper, and THEN save up for a big fancy ceremony that you can invite your whole family to. At least then you can make sure the usual bad wedding disasters like one of them running off doesn't happen.
That’s better like I’d still want a memorable ceremony, just getting married at the courthouse is too formal and seems a bit boring
@@pinkrebellionxyz1567 sure. But if you can get some tax benefits from being married, waiting months and months and months for a wedding is pointless. Get it all done on paper so you can get the benefits and then have a wedding. Nobody there needs to know you’re already married.
@@joeyjackson5075 that why I said “just” getting married at the courthouse is boring. Obviously have the ceremony after, I’ve never had a big party so I’d want my wedding to be a huge celebration with close family and friends
That exactly what my wife and I are doing. The big one is in Mexico next month!
@@theoutlook55 ayeee congratulations
Green after thinking, Green, None, Green! It’s 3/4 with one yellow!
such a understanding woman
Wow, honest, mature, adult dating advice! ❤
Prenuptial just makes sense, you never know what peoples motivation is, or what they will turn in to if the marriage doesn't work out.
Finally a woman with sensibility. Green flag for you everyday.
yeah, don't like how love is meant to make you make bad choices. women divorce 3x as much as men
@@BBalloon Are you talking about who files first? because unless there's a lot of lesbians getting divorces, that makes no sense.
@@Robynhoodlum divorce happens to 50% of marriages, women initiate divorce 80% of the time, 90% if she's college educated
@@Robynhoodlum yeah my bad. thanks haha
So refreshing to see a woman who gives a reason for her opinions negative or positive
This woman is a treasure
Both of my parents are lawyers, they always warned me about people who would only mary on joint finances terms. It's just so restrictive
I don't see how. If you can't figure out how to merge your finances to both people's satisfactions, how are you going to make anything else in the marriage work?
@@Haylla2008 says the woman who is subconsciously and secretly planning to take the man's house and his money in the future whenever she who loses interest yeah not going to listen to you😂😂😂
@@jaydubyo That has nothing to do with this conversation but thanks for letting me know your insecurities.
@@Brent-ln9bc Do you often feel the need to prove yourself to random people you don't know on the internet who make wild assumptions about you?
@@Haylla2008 so you just clarified why didn't you reply to the other guy. If you took some effort to type that, might as well have denied that that is not what you're looking to do in the future
Having a Prenup shows how responsible you are with your finances. It anticipates loss and protects people from it, that's all. No matter how good things seem, after marriage, things can change and you should have your rights protected. If one of the partners is offended by getting a Prenup, that's the real red flag.
I can understand being offended by getting a prenup. There isn’t any wrong with getting offended because it does question your relationship in the future and to be truthful people just don’t like thinking about that. Of course mature relationship wise it’s understandable, but especially if you both come from different backgrounds financially it can get a bit tricky. I myself definitely want a prenup if I get married. I love my boyfriend, but you never know what’s down the line and I am afraid of financial instability afterwards. I want to go into a relationship supporting myself and come out the same way. I do not ever want someone or myself relying on the other for my finances. It’s a harsh situation on the relationship, but like you said yourself you need to protect your own rights, finances, and belongings. I do not want to pay alimony to someone I want nothing more to do with.
It all depends on communication and honesty. When you’re marrying someone you’re building a relationship/lives together. Some people see prenups as a 0 responsibility get out of jail free card.
But that’s what communication is for. Some people are pressured by family for one, and others have lifelong assets they would like to protect. It’s better to have an open conversation and mutual understanding as to why. A lot of the time prenups are seen, through movies, and shows, as heavily one-sided arrangements, but it can be a mutual choice
@@cirruscries simple. Women don’t like you, they like your money. Almost like it’s been said a million times
@@mrOGbobbyjohnson There are many women I know who are capable of supporting themselves without the need of a male. Please go cry about your misogynistic viewpoints typed from your mother’s basement into another comment section. ❤️
@@cirruscries I'd be more offended that a girl would get offended by having a prenup... Kinda sounds like they want the opportunity to take your stuff if it doesn't work out.
This is really giving me better perspective on my past breakup. I'm now realizing how awful they were to me
I’ve never agreed so much on a controversial topic and see so SO many others agree too.
Prenups are a green flag tbh
Always prenup! You can never predict what will happen in the future!
Prenups + credit card
Her take is pretty reasonable. If they're pretty close to equal earners, a prenup is weird. If one person has way more, a prenup is understandable.
@@Zyphent A prenup is not weird 💀 A prenup ensures that legally, they cannot take your stuff if you divorce. What’s weird is not wanting a prenup. Also, without a prenup the state can decide how you split your assets. A prenup means you decide.
@@DeathnoteBBIf there is a prenup, there should be a clause to compensate if the other becomes a staying at home parent. Becoming a full time parent for 10 or 15 years is basically destroying your career and reducing your access to financial independence.
I think this just proves how there are so many little things that you have to talk about with your partner before getting married; cause all of these things can be either a red flag or a green flag depending on the person's views, wants, and needs c:
Her answer for prenup was spot on lol
Respect to this lady, she has her priorities in check!!
Credit cards are fine, and freelancing can be pretty rough, depending on what you do.
The only reason to not have a credit card is if you are habitually not paying all of the balance off before they charge interest on what's left; otherwise, it's a good way to build your credit score.
@@XisoLate credit cards are honestly one of the worst parts of modern society. Why do I need to prove that I can perpetually pay off tiny loans just to buy a house? Whilst if I save up enough cash, I can just buy it out right. It doesn't make sense. It has never made sense. Credit is a scam. I refuse to conform
@@callmestumps6954 You can do it that way and save up the cash. No one is forcing people to get a credit card. The're other ways to establish credit. What society doesn't want is to give a group of people loans for vehicles and houses where the balances are unlikely paid in full that month would then be reposessed three months later.
@@callmestumps6954 I see Credit cards as a safety net. Why would I risk my own money when I can risk someone elses money? If my debit card gets used for fraud or if i get scammed, I am out that money immediately. Sure I can probably get it back eventually, but that process can take months to get resolved. During that time that money it tied up and unavailable to me to use. Hopefully I have extra money in savings or other accounts I can use in the meantime.
If my credit card get used for fraud. I still got my money in my account. I haven't lost any money. Just that line of credit is tied up until the fraud is resolved. I also have a big credit card company working to get the fraud resolved as it is their money on the line.
No credit card, little to no credit 💀
Edit: Having a credit card and paying off your debit regularly on time is one of the easiest ways to build credit.
Yeah people forget it’s a two way problem. No credit without a credit card, however that’s a complete social construct just to get credit card companies more money, so you cant win
@@DeathnoteBB money itself is a social construct. We live in this society so we need to play by its rules.
The issue here seems to be that she doesn't know how to manage her credit cards. I use cards for everything. Builds points, cash back rewards, and I just pay it off at the end of each mo th. If I make a large purchase I tend to use a payment plan with a no interest option even though I have the cash on hand. Builds credit, no credit card debt.
@@WiGgYof09 Yes, it is, but you need money to buy things in the current society. A credit card is optional.
I have a credit card, but I don't actually use it for that? if that makes sense? credit scores were never a concern of mine because I only spend money that is already mine
Glad someone said it
Credit is vitally important!!
Thanks for pointing out the green and red flags at the start, i was wondering where those bright neon things are, I thought you forgot them
I'm pro courthouse too! Going into debt just to get married seems like financial setup.
I was pro courthouse until I had my own wedding. I think having that memory to share with your special person is invaluable.
@@lkjkhfggd And that’s why weddings are expensive
you can make courthouse weddings your own special memory too, you just have to be open minded about it
@@lkjkhfggdyou could always you know redo your wedding? It’s not rocket science, you aren’t restricted to one wedding.
@@PastPositive Sure! If that's what you want to do, then go for it!
I’d prefer if my partner and I get a prenup. It protects the both of us and gives us peace of mind about finances. My parents are in a happy marriage with a prenup because they wanted to remove a possible fight about money.
Just don't marry then
Why wear a seatbelt ? just dont crash !
Why healthcare insurance?just dont get sick!
Isnt it only assets before marriage? Money and assets they accrued during marriage can still be negotiated?
@@etfreima2080It depends on what’s in the prenup. Prenups are basically just contracts that state the consequence to a hypothetical scenario. “If ‘A’ happens, then you get ‘B’ and I get ‘C’.”
@@etfreima2080 yes but it also needs to be signed like months before the wedding, women can aim duress in court and the prenup gets thrown out.
If she has been with you through the hustle, she’s gotta be there when you make it big!
Made me smile when dave ramsey popped up when she said she'd rather pay cash
You don't owe intrest on the card if you just pay it off in full.
Keep a credit card, treat it like a debit.
And just ask another lawyer to represent you and look over the prenup so it protects the both of you. You can still merge finances, just define in the prenup what happens if one of y'all cheat etc.
Marriage is a contract with financial implications, I'd _never_ join a contract without being clear on the fineprint, the prenup is the fineprint.
Half of credit card users carry a balance and the average debt is 5000. Flip a coin if you're good with credit cards or not
Shut up.
@@rhiesa3945 its not a coinflip, its a learned skill.
And sure, if you can't handle it don't have it, but acting like it's automatic debt is a straight up lie.
You can cauntion people on the pitfalls of something without missinformation.
@@ricebeansrockroll882 I think you’re forgetting than some people were never taught about it properly and only have the people around them to base their opinions off
@@yuri_mony989 I love the irony that you can't see that the thing you are acting pissy about is the reason I wrote the comment.
People don't know these things, that's _why_ I pointed the missinformation out.
And no, it's not a cointoss if creditcards cause debt. It's a skill.
Talking about it is the first step to giving people the tools and skills to maneage their finances.
Spreading the idea that it's predestined to cause debt does not, that's fatalism and the absolute opposite of empowering people around money.
I grew up poor, we didn't always have enough to eat, I'm in a better place now but I'm still not rich or even middle class. Having control over the little money I do have over though makes a huge differene, and I'm pretty passionate about others getting the same oppertunity.
So yeah, I'm going to keep pointing out missinformation like this, shit that _hurt_ people financially.
Bruh if you pay credit cards on time and in full it benefits you
It actually doesn't. Not over straight cash / bank accounts.
Credit cards make money off of interest, and anytime it takes more than 1 pay period to pay off the full balance, you are losing money. Companies will offer "rewards" for credit levels, but these will *NEVER* equate to the money your paying them via interest. The amount if money these companies set as goals will always be higher than how much you can possibly make.
Large investments into say, a mortgage, a house.. moving across the country may be worth the interest you acrew over the cost of the investment. (Moving to a better employing city for example) but the ideal situation is to save enough money to afford that without a credit card. Thata not always possible and in those cases, the lesser amount of cash you have, the more disproportionately large the interest is versus your entire account..
Credit cards do no provide benefits. This is a marketing tactic and nothing more.
@@TheKiroshi if you pay it off before intrest starts to build up, you only get the rewards. The reason they are able to offer the rewards is because many people do not use credit cards responsibly and end up owing interest. They are a hook to draw people in, but they can be to your benefit if you are cautious. I have never once had to pay a cent of interest, because I use the cards as if they were money from my checking account. Purchase goes on card, gets paid off immediately, and I get the 5% cash back from using the card without any interest. Using it like this, you do gain benefits over just using cash or debit.
@@TheKiroshi you are objectively wrong. Get a card with no annual fee. Use it as a debit card (pay it off in full every month) as the poster said and get a card with cash back, you are literally saving at a minimum most likely 1% on most purchases
People who say credit cards are bad, don’t know how to properly use one
@@TheKiroshi that’s exactly why they said paying off in full. Standard interest free period is around 56 days, but the benefits that credit cards can provide are another bonus. If you’re irresponsible and lending money you don’t/won’t have then that’s when they become dangerous, but in the hands of a responsible person they can be amazing benefits wise.
He had to label the flags green and red like someone didn't know what colors were
Honestly the prenup response is gold. I feel like so many men think they need the same level of protection as Millionaires and Football players but if you're both starting off on the same level 🤷♀️
I’m really sad about how expensive weddings are now! I’m still getting married in a courthouse first, but a wedding for me is more of a family reunion and having the families meet.
Look, back yard and pay anyone or ask anyone you know who is a Self-uniting, or Quaker hehe 😜 Anyone who cares will do it for free. Pay as much as you would any birthday party 🥳 and I’d never buy a dress over 50 bucks id really look for a 30 dollar dress if my man proposed.
Does she not understand that you won’t pay 28% interest on a credit card as long as you pay it back on time?
“As long as you pay it back” not everyone can, a lot of people overspend. So they don’t get a credit card
She didn’t because sadly she isn’t very smart
@@lianav707 Speak for yourself
@@lianav707 Or maybe she just prefer debit?
It is what suits everyone better in the end.
@@DeathnoteBB So that implies credit cards are not inherently bad. Credit cards are bad if you are not responsible. That is a comment on the person not credit cards in general. Hammers are bad if you give it to a murderer. But hammers are not inherently evil in themselves. There is a significant difference between "credit cards are bad" and "credit cards are bad if you are irresponsible". These two are completely different and unrelated statements.
The discussion is are credit cards bad in themselves, which the answer is no. But then coming and adding "if you are responsible" is irrelevant to the discussion.
Its like talking about how apples taste create, and you responding but bananas suck. Sure bananas suck, but we are talking about apples. "If responsible" is the banana.
Her thinking having a CC is a red flag......IS A RED FLAG 😂
Never merge finance. It’ll come back to bite you
I love this lady, she's so sweet 😭
Building credit is essential. You can build credit without a credit card but it is much harder and you need credit prior to getting a mortgage or car payment that affords you said opportunity.
Yes, I thought when younger that getting a credit card would be bad but only because my mom didn't know how to properly use one
Yeah but, I don't want to owe the bank money. Too annoying
I wish more people were like this women fr
Bro, props to the editor. At first I didn't know which flag was which.
I’ll always remember my ma telling me that I need to sign a prenup whatever happens, in her past she had been cheated out of lots of money not from a romantic partner but still people she trusted- she taught me that whatever happens I need money to survive and have a roof over my head.
My husband and I married while we were in high school and had a kid shortly after before I turned 18. Because we were starting off like that so young, during a time when COVID had just shut down so many jobs, my husband offered to be a stay at home dad while I worked. Honnestly, I feel asking for a prenup in that situation would have been a horrible thing to do. Me expecting him to be a stay at home dad puts him in a situation where he is throwing away his chance to get his foot down in a career because he is dedicating all his time to our children.
In some situations, it is definitely a good call. But it can really be an innapropiate decision in others. Especially if you've established a healthy way to team up with your partner.
if you don’t get a prenup and you get divorced for ANY reason, including because you both have mutually decided it isn’t working and the situation is entirely amicable, you’ll be subject to the state’s laws about splitting finances and you might not like those.
You get a prenup no matter if you wrute one up or not. The only difference is if you dont make your own you get what the government has set up for you
When a person says ELTZ that's a red flag 😂
red flag a wedding should be a large event for all to witness
She literally radiates " wife material "😂❤
I like that she explained herself on the prenup. A prenup is understandable if one partner has WAY more than the other. If you're both going in with the same amount of money/stuff, merged is completely understandable.
But that only makes sense if you plan to screw the partner over in a divorce.
@@spelcheak prenups make things fair, not unfair.
@@johnclark7862 they make things fair for men as marriage is unfair towards men.
@@shaivjoshi4063 No it gives the one with higher income any assets that both contributed to an advantage. So if the partner that contributed more becomes the lower earner before divorce they are screwed.
@MelonSauce are all prenups written the same?
Damn, I think you dropped this Betty: 👑
This queen, is a walking green flag
This is the most generous woman. But she's obviously older and wiser
I think over the next 20 years prenups will become the norm. So many people get their livelihoods taken away because a partner is only in it for the money. Without a prenup, your partner is entitled to half no matter when the item was bought. With a prenup, what's yours is yours unless bought during the marriage.
However, it is a massive sign of distrust in your partner. If you feel you need to protect that, then you shouldn't get married in the first place. Only when your relationship is founded on trust should you even consider it.
@@projectstart5522 Methinks you’re projecting some trauma, hun. I wouldn’t trust anyone who refuses a prenup.
@@projectstart5522 Eh, it's not about trust. Betrayal comes from the ones you least expect. It's stupid to get into a contract with someone that benefits from breaking it. Also no matter how much you trust someone there is always a small chance to get hurt.
@@DeathnoteBBisn't that his point?
@@ameenah6472 It sounds like the exact opposite of their point
I like this lady she thinks before answering unlike some ppl
My parents got married at a courthouse, mainly because their "wedding planer" took their money and ran.
Omg what
Wow! 😮 did they ever track him down and get it back
@@giftofthewild6665 i don't think that my parents ever found whatever you like to call them.
Omg that's horrible
That's so sad.
The marriage ceremony can be anywhere because that is meant for the couple to be somehow officially joining but so many people think weddings are a waste of money when the point of a wedding is celebration with family and friends. They can get too expensive but my family always did weddings on the cheap and we still had a fantastic time!
Agreed completely. Honestly, if I marry someone, I'm just getting a pretty white dress, going to the courthouse and having a BBQ party with close family and friends afterwards.
Like, wedding parties can be fun, don't get me wrong (I remember my cousin literally got a samba school percursion battery to play in her wedding just for the hell of it), but it's too expensive and there's way too much noise and people for me (plus the pressure of inviting ALL of your extended family just because it's a big event. Like, fuck them, I don't like half of my more distant relatives and at best I'm indifferent towards most of the other half). With the money that I'd spend organising the whole ceremony and after-party, and catering to all the guests for a fancy wedding, I could do the party of the century with the people I actually enjoy being with.
Also, out of like, 5 family and family friend's weddings I attended, only ONE had actually good food; I don't know why but every single wedding buffet service here has mid food at best. Worse still when they try to make something "fancy" but you either end up with something that tastes horrible, something cheap that's plated fancy and that's expensive, or both; drives me nuts. If I'm having a party to celebrate my love and union with someone, the least I want it's good food to celebrate, dang it '^'
your story kinda goes against the point that too many people think weddings are a waste of money. If weddings were unnesicarily thought were expensive they would want something cheap/not do any celebration
Agree! You can have a good wedding and still be thrifty about it…
Prenups are a must. Never sign a contract where one party gets PAID TO LEAVE
That’s ur opinion. Every man I date I make sure he understands pretty much immediately what he’s signing up for and what I expect of him. I’ve never had a man that I’m dating disagree with me on this, or if they did then the relationship went no further. We all have different preferences and wants/needs. We get to choose our partners and have our own priorities which is what makes us human. What doesn’t work for u might work for someone else. And just cuz it didn’t work out for u doesn’t mean it wouldn’t for someone else. Many women will not date someone who will sign a prenup, like myself. And that’s fine. Just means ur not compatible. And no, i don’t plan on taking them for all they got?? In any relationship I’ve been in I’m usually the one who is financially better off anyways. If I’m going to have ur children and start a family, which is all I want and care about is to find a good husband/father, well then I need to feel secure and never fear my financial situation collapsing because the marriage didn’t work out or the guy couldn’t stay loyal. Since nowadays there is such a high possibility of the marriage failing so my #1 priority will always will be my children and I will NEVER set myself up to become a struggling single mom in case the father decides to neglect his family or abandon us entirely. Probably another reason why I feel this way is because I’m usually the one on the receiving end of being taken for all I’ve got. Maybe not in ur time. But in my generation, many men are mooches and are looking for a woman to fill the role of their “mommy” instead of wife. If a man loves u enough and trusts u enough and has FAITH in ur relationship then there would be no reason in his eyes to sign a prenup.
@@sumbunniii8721 We're probably about the same age if I had to guess based on what you've said.
70-80% of marriages ending in divorce are initiated by women, 90% if they're college educated Why? Because SHE gets to decide (even when they might be doing their best). Rarely will a man end a marriage, it'll only destroy him.
In your own response you based the entire argument on an unfaithful man but we KNOW from the data that men are not leaving relationships and not cheating even close to as much (VAST majority just look at the data don't take my word for it DYOR). Not only that, but when a man decides the same thing about his woman (neglecting children, not paying her dues, not doing chores, being lazy etc), he STILL has to pay... even though SHES the problem. And guess what? If he can't pay he goes to jail/prison (indentured servitude, one of the few forms of slavery still alive today) and if a women doesn't pay, she gets government assistance! So, even if you didn't have a job and your man left, you wouldn't be struggling, the government pays for you! That's why so many women do it! At no point is there an advantage for a man to get married. He gains nothing but liability. The woman, on the other hand, is completely taken care of A-Z. Women are almost never the primary earners in a household.
And your mooch comment is hilarious. I've been used for free dates countless times, free drinks countless times, only to never hear from them again or to hear they're sleeping with someone else. Soooo many girls have a "roster" that they use to get attention and keep guys in friend zones. Only 1% of men can say that. In a study done last year, a male model got 9 matches on tinder, an obese woman got 300 in the same timeframe. You'll never be alone and not provided for, you don't know what loneliness really is. 33% of men haven't had sex EVER in their life. Then, when he does get a girl, she expects him to pay for everything, work all day, come home and provide and protect her, and also do the cooking and cleaning? Women have a grocery list of things they need in a man. Quit acting like life is hard for you compared to man. It's not even close. You're born with value and marriage is setup for you to succeed no matter what. It's not even close to the same for a man.
If you disagree, what are three advantages a man gains by getting married? Especially without a prenup. Also, don't ever expect to marry a rich man without a prenup. He's too smart for that.
I agree with all her answers..
More like I prefer to marry at courthouse cuz I'm too shy to be in the spotlight and I don't have friends 💀
I see this as an absolute win fellas
it's called pay your credit card off at the end of every month and don't pay interest?
Exactly
You could build credit just by doing that and use it even if you don't want something with interest
U can absolutely do that its just that a lot of people don't have that kind of self control
How come when I use my cc AND I pay within 2 weeks of that transaction it drops my score? I rarely use it anymore.
@@kadenkendall8469 it's literally not hard for me I don't get it.
@@jordansmith3721 you'd need to look at the card.
Her thoughts on Prenup are so refreshing. My girlfriend wants a Prenup specifically because she will inherit her family business later, and I completely understand and support that decision. A prenup can be a good thing under certain circumstances
Even though I don't agree on every decision she made, she has a well thought reason behind her decisions and calmly eloquently spoke on it.
If I were to have a man, I would want to get married at the courthouse. It’s cheap, you offend everyone because you invited no-one. And true love isn’t a wedding, it’s spending your life with somebody.
True, but a ceremony celebration is nice. If people are jealous they should understand there was a limit etc. Plus I’d like it to be memorable not just signing paperwork. Seems a tad boring to just have a court wedding, funny if you end up in the same court for a divorce or prison sentence😂
I'm a woman and I have suggested a prenup to my boyfriend who wants to get married next year 😆 Not because I expect it will end in divorce but also a way to show him I'm not in it for the money. If anything, our fortune is for the kids. Also don't touch my pension 🤣
REAL. PRENUP is very important, I believe
Make sure to have your own money just in case..
I want her to raise those flags for me whenever I am trying to make a decision 😂
I like this kind and sensible lady
The prenup thing had me worried for a bit, but I can understand that togetherness. Cus if you build wealth together, your enabling each other to thrive, it’s not just you when you have a partner by your side
A prenup wouldn’t affect anything they do together. Prenups only protect assets from before the marriage
@@adamdelorenzo5407 No they don't, not necessarily. A prenup is not one specific form you fill out. A prenup agreement is to lay out the conditions for how you want finances to be handled in the event of a divorce, to make potential divorce proceedings easier and less costly after the fact, but the couple can stipulate any conditions they want in there. So that might indeed be to protect assets from before the marriage, but it might also include provisions for any future earnings, possible inheritance, finances for children from a previous marriage, whatever, really. You can also have a prenup state that in the event of a no-fault divorce, everything is split 50-50, so that if things go ugly, neither party can contest it or try to unfairly get more money out of their partner in an actual divorce. So in that case, if neither have significant prior earnings and one side is pushing for a prenup for a guaranteed 50-50, it might be a red flag, if that party ends up having far less assets down the line. Depends on the prenup.
The most well adjusted woman on earth! ❤
Credit card thing is a grey flag. She talked about putting a down payment on a house, but if he doesn’t have a credit card, he doesn’t have a good credit score most likely to do it.
Not me thinking the opposite for almost every answer
Having no credit card is a red flag for me because we need a credit score in this society to get anything. I have 3 credit cards, pay them off in full nearly every month, and my credit score is rounding 800. He needs a good credit score so we can get approved for future credit cards, better mortgages, better interest rates. I literally told my now husband that I couldn't marry him unless he had a credit card.
Agreed
You can have good credit without a credit card.
I've never had a credit card and my credit score falls in the very good range. 🤷🏼♀️
@@krn2683 these days student loans like FAFSA also impact your credit, this is how I was able to get my current credit card as a college student since i had an already established credit score.
In normal countries, you can get around fine without a credit card.