I can relate to that. When people invite me to a party, I always have to find an excuse. When it’s my birthday, there is a big chance that nasty people might turn up and I hide in the mountains! Greetings from Germany
They are in part, but that’s how love works, like it takes sacrifice. It takes romance in the mundane. It takes choosing every time which is really hard when cycles are seen as so negative. But we can’t change without giving ourselves to something.
Connections where u can be yourself is a freeing experience, once you’re pretending It’s a chore. Free yourself, and you’ll embrace intimacy with others
@@zakerawhite even in times when being free is frightening, when you face your fears such as insecurity it doesn’t exist anymore. Honesty frees you as well, we tend to wear masks and forget that people are just like us lol, in all aspects try to make light of any situation you’re in, don’t reject how you feel. The truth is that you’re always free, fear just blinds you, start off with facing fears by combating it with faith and confidence. As well as how well do you know yourself? How can you free yourself if you don’t know them? First, when you love and know who you are wholeheartedly, bring “free” is the bare minimum as to how powerful you truly are. I recommend reading Neville Goddard, personally I have faith in God which has helped me, I sought after God and found myself. I’m aware that not everyone is keen to religion/spirituality, but it has helped me!
As someone who is also socially reserved and feels uninteresting I think we can’t tell how interesting we are because we spend so much time alone with ourselves consumed by our thoughts and hobbies that they become dull to us. We forget there’s only one of us and other people don’t have the “luxury” of experiencing us all the time so we are new and interesting to them xx
Lately I’ve been having the same kind of fear that I’m just not interesting enough to most people. But I also don’t like the idea of always having to ‘perform’ in order to fit in, or having to try my best to ‘entertain’ someone. I want to be around people who enjoy my company just because, and not just for when they’re bored and no one else is available. I guess my main strife with making friends is that I want deep, meaningful, and long lasting connections but the people I’m around seem to only want to keep things surface level, which I can only go so far with.
I can relate heavily to this because I really don't have many interests that the majority of people are interested in and it's difficult to start conversations with the "normal folk."
in my, probably very limited, experience a lot of people want to gossip or share about the people in their lives. i don't even mean gossip in an inherently negative way, but i'm not myself a gossiper even if i like to hear some. i'm an overthinker who loves film and tv and i get too existential too soon for a lot of people. i don't have a lot to share about my family so i revisit the same topics because they're safe to share. a lot of stuff is dark or would require me giving some long winded backstory. just makes it hard to know what to say or have anything to say but idk. maybe i'm not as weird as i think. i've had some vulnerable conversations with coworkers. perhaps i'm just all or nothing about connections
@@eg4441this is so real. my “backstory” is way too dark/unpleasant to explain and i hate when people ask cause i feel like they’re gonna interpret it as me trauma dumping and bringing down the mood
"no one can out-hate me" is so real-- but at the same time if you flip the coin "no one can out-love me" ik easier said than done but its something to ponder on for you and I both cus i never would've thought of that if i didn't hear it from your mouth
this is something i always try to explain to people and no one ever understands. people think its absurd that i hate phone calls and that i despise small talk. ive literally said before “ i dont wanna have a social presence everyday “
When you're feeling anxiety in public sit back in your chair and acknowledge your breathing. Remind yourself that you are beneath no one. Don't give anxiety so much power. If you don't feel smart in conversation then take your time choosing a response and use simple words to express it.
The reason for my issue with intimacy is that I assume and set an expectation that whoever I let in is going to immediately follow suit or connect with me on that level, and I lack that understanding right in the moment and feel butthurt later, saying to myself that its just not the case babes!
socially awkward introvert here ❤. Some people come at me as well and say “ you don’t seem introverted to me.”. but it’s because THEY are the talker and I cant ignore them or avoid socializing with them. They never realize I only speak when spoken too.
This is proof that beauty is in the eye of the beholder bc I have always thought ever since I saw you in my recommended, that you were really beautiful. The way you do your brows and your makeup, and your bone structure is stunning in my opinion
💯. I find social gatherings themselves to be awkward. Many in those gatherings are full of questions sizing each other up. Many boast about themselves and what they have. Gossipers and complainers. The negativity is exhausting. It is in such settings that you can really see the cloaked insecurities of others. There is strength in being able to be alone. Relying on you. People are highly volatile and unreliable. You just never know if others are trustworthy. It is better to trust in yourself.
Heavy on the going about the day in silence lol. I'm not socially awkward or anything, but simply being quiet is enjoyable to me. I'm one of those people that would love to see the world be quiet for a few days.. lets see what happens lol.
Just stumbled on your channel… it saddens me that you feel this way about yourself!! You are unbelievable gorgeous, I find you highly intelligent and interesting. I’m a slightly “older “ women so I could likely be your mom. lol so not trying to preach to you but know I have been where you are. Anywho girl!! Everyone has insecurities even the most confident person. I’m a former performer and have always felt socially awkward even though others didn’t view me as such. I have also struggled with anxiety my entire life!! I just wish for you to be more comfortable in your own skin and realize just you being you is enough contribution to the world! Try to stop beating yourself up and live in your power! Your beautiful energy is needed to raise the vibration of this earth! Know that all the answers don’t come before we are 21… on this journey sometimes we gotta just ride the wave baby girl!! Everything will work out how it should work out for you. And if someone can’t see your light you should not associate your self with those individuals. 🙏🏾💫💫💫
Some people have called me weird, others thought I was special. But in reality is just the unavoidable awkwardness and social anxiety I'm cursed with. Socializing just feels like a complex jigsaw puzzle that everyone knows how to solve except for me. And for each piece I place in the wrong spot, I'm judged by everyone for 'not figuring out already' 🥲 🔫
And by the way, everything you said in this video is TOTALLY ME! It's crazy, I relate to everything. Having friends is so tiring, I loooooove staying by myself, because there's no pressure. BUT, I have one friend and our friendship is low maintenance, meaning that we talk to each others whenever we want (sometimes it's once a month, sometimes more) and nobody takes it personally if we go for a long period of time without talking to each others, because we both understand ourselves, we're both introverted and so that's such a blessing. I hope you'll find a friendship like that because I honestly think that it's the best type of relationships for people like us
I can relate to this. I met up with an old friend after 3 years and I just felt so boring compared to how I used to be. But I realized that I'm just a peaceful person now and that's okay.
It makes sense that vulnerability can make you feel nervous but you’re allowing yourself to be more open. By the way, you are beautiful and very intelligent! You’re being true to yourself. 😊🤙🏽
Are you neurodivergent? I feel exactly the same, my awkward socialisation moments happen at work with my coworkers, and I can tell they think I'm super weird HAHAHA, like I cannot for the life of me speak like a normal human being, I have to ask myself how can I appear normal to them. BUT I noticed that when I was hanging out with neurodivergent people, there was NO pressure to be myself because those people are "weird" in the eyes of society anyways, and so that reliefs a pressure from me and I know that I don't have to play a role with them since they're being their true self without any shame
I try to speak like a normal human being but my sentence structure comes out like I'm a german raised in japan. it's fucking weird and I feel so weird just trying to 'speak normal'. I can type well I just struggle to articulate well.
I literally was thinking the same thing!!! Was waiting to see if anyone said anything first. So I’m glad you said that. I have been diagnosed with ADHD and have been looking into autism as well (but jeezums is it expensive!) But all of these things mentioned have been an experiences I’ve related to in groups that have these neuro-differences. I hope that all of us in these experiences know that we are not alone and we can tribe out together juxtapose or apart❤❤❤
Same I wanted to have friends even went out and met ppl but I realize I feel tired of maintaining it. So I haven’t even spoken to them. Being alone I guess I forgot how much work it required to keep connections. I want to have ppl sometimes but then I just feel tired. Consistency does feel hard for me so idk how to do it for other ppl. I always think I won’t be good enough or appreciated unconditionally.i have a hard time feeling like I need to justify my existence
Girl I was gonna say the opposite abt your features. Literally everything’s is unique. I think ethereal sometimes rocking the short hair the piercings eyebrows etc . Your appearance is definitely different
Your'e absolutely unique and very pretty. Your style is unique and you have a very good faculty of expressing feelings with words. Which is a rare quality , and opening up about your insecurities and genuinely trying to be you without thinking of the opinion of others is the first step to feel better in your own skin and mind. I have never seen someone like you before , the combination of your personality and your appearance is quite perfect. I would have never tought that girls with short hair would attract me so much, me being a girl with short hair too but im more so a stud. But you are one of these girls with short hair that i find soo pretty and elegant🥰
All I can say is I feel you! So much that I got medicated. Also you will find people that doesn’t make connections feel like a chore. Most people I repel from but I’ve learned how to hone it in the professional world. I feel that when we go through this it’s for a sole purpose in our growth journey. The older I get the more I don’t care about what people say. I embrace the weird and awkwardness because I’m realizing that’s just who I am. People who love you will also embrace it and make conversations easier. Medicated or unmedicated. I love being around people but recently found comfort in just being alone doing the hobbies I love. I also have ADHD and anxiety as well as some autism. I graduated college and beauty school then recently opened a business. Praying it works but girl you got this. All you can do is continue being you. You will find the beauty within every aspect of yourself within due time. ❤ thanks for sharing!
Thank you for your honesty. I feel like this too. I had social anxiety at first, did some exposure therapy and I got better. But now social interactions kind of lost their spice for me now.
Can you tell more? Because I probably feel the same way: When I manage to relax in social situation I often notice that actually I'm a bit bored & don't care to be there. I'm wondering maybe my social anxiety stems from me forcing myself to be in (social) situations where I really don't care to be. Like maybe I'm not insecure and scared of people but my own pressure.
you can capture an audience online, youre further ahead than most, i messed up so hard today im boutta die of cringe bruh i cant believe im so incompetent at being a human and having social interactions, this video popping up today is lowkey god sent. i feel you tho, i struggle with the same thing, i want connections but theyre tedious, and i hate vulnerabilty and intimacy but at the same time i want ppl to understand me and for that i gotta open up which i fear. so its not rly that i hate intimacy and connections, i just feel uncomfortable about it. so i just need to figure out why and need to get rid of the fear. i also fear of being boring cus ive been called boring before, even by my crush that shi haunts me to this day its pathetic, I'm a grown man bro. i rly wanna get rid of this inferiority complex or whatever its called idk, but im tired fo feeling like this. im yapping, anyways good video , im definetly gonna check out your channel!
I’m slowly realizing I am not alone in this journey. I want to free myself from expectations or projected expectations. I just want to exist and not care if I’m interesting enough. While also being extraordinary in my own way.
My sentiments daily. I try talking myself out of these thoughts but it’s just truly how I feel. However you darling are enough in every way 💫 It’s amazing that we can’t see the beauty of ourselves but outsiders feel completely different. I genuinely think you are gorgeous and I wish I could rock the same type of haircut.
This is how i discovered im neurodivergent, i was diagnosed autistic last year, and when i tell you i RELATE to everything you said!! Word to word. Hands down. 💯
Most people aren’t interesting, but the more you talk to a person just to talk, that makes you more interesting to them, but you avoid that. You’ve got to talk more, regardless of what someone will think.
I Can Relate to This >>>>>>> as a Gemini I come off as Very Social because I Can Communicate Very well and make it easy for people to talk to me!! But if it was Up to me. I would go about my life as a MUTE LOLZ!!! ♥️ then again I’m not even gone LIE, I have spurs of the moment where I just wanna be like a butterfly , social asx Hell ❣️❣️
It takes strength to open up like you have. Thank you for encouraging others to do the same because it is the strength that comes from the heart that heals wounds.
OMG!!! Randomly... X that. Nothing is ever random. I TOTALLY feel you. Your video RESINATES through my SOUL. All my life I've felt that I beat to my own drum. Society would label it as (DIFFERENT) I'm okay with my awkwardness. I guess a part of it is because I'm a EMPATH. Zion NEVER EVER stop being your true Authentic self. One Love ❤️ 🙏🏿💯
thank you for uploading this! i connected to a lot of what you said. i didn't want to admit that connections are a chore, also due to my perceptions of self. i was recently struck with the sad truth that it will naturally be hard for me to beat my loneliness bc i hate connecting with people. ironically, hearing you expressing similar ideas helps me feel more in touch with people.
i’ve never had someone verbalize my exact thoughts and behavior in such a profound and understanding manner. thank you for sharing this part of yourself with us
look at you being vulnerable on the internet, you're already on the journey.. you're value is inherent + it gets better w age also (self-compassion is key, your thoughts will lie to you sometimes)
please make more videos I love watching them! a few months ago I was feeling EXACTLY like this and I love how you just put words to it and it kind of really healed a part of me, thank you!
You're not in a relationship to give something to someone, you're just there to be you. Everybody is beautiful in it's own way. And you're just beautiful for being you, you do not need to be or offer something else. You need to see and value your beauty as a whole and expect others to see and love you in that way, regardless of your problems or insecurities. Anyways I am just a stranger on the Internet and the Algorithm happened to show me your video. I hope you will find healing and go on your way. You seem like a beautiful person to me and I thank you for making this video.
HEAVILY relatable. It's tough to undestand that you have so many insecurities but no clue how to resolve them. Just know that you're abolutely not alone
Literally from the start of the video I viewed you to be so extremely gorgeous🫶🏽For you to think you have a boring face baffles me to the core….However the socially awkward stand point, insecurities and lack of intimacy portion was so much more relatable than you think. I’m glad you posted this. I feel a lot safer that it isn’t just me….Ive always felt so weird majority of my life. So that whole “I’m my biggest hater” part HIT SO HARD for me. Communication is difficult for EVERYONE I believe. Even if it’s in different ways. Don’t be fooled by the ones who talk smoother than butter. If you don’t have the words to really talk just make it known. Get people to adjust to YOU….Not the other way around
As someone who has felt the same at your age and still does at times I promise you that your relationship with yourself will get better! I would say lean into your imperfections and know that everybody is just as insecure if not more. Most of the time no one is judging you as harshly as you are. I would say keep being brave and vulnerable I believe that’s the key. U seem like a very interesting person!
Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable. Self-reflection and adaptation is a super power that most people never harness, but you are well on your way. The way you think is more interesting than any shallow conversation you could have with just anybody, keep going deeper. Treat it as a filter and trust the right people will attract themselves to you as you self-actualize. Best wishes on your journey. Grant yourself the grace of time, things happen as they should ❤
Just do what you feel. Society has so many pressures that make us feel like we have to do or say certain things when… we don’t. It takes time and accountability to get to where you want to be. There’s this book How to Be an Adult id recommend. It is safe to be who you are and no need to show up as an expectation
I stopped masking and I have no friends now but I do feel happy. I have family and my partner so they fulfil me a lot , but I am lonely I just want to have a friend to chat silly stuff with but I’m not good enough at friendships I guess. Hopefully things will get easier now we are all becoming so much more open. Thank you for sharing.
You sound like you're on the right track. A lot of what you describe sounds like masking and it's an exhausting task. In order for social things to not feel like a chore you have to let yourself relax and breathe and let go of that obligation to present a certain way or talk a certain amount, at least when you're with certain people.
What you’ve shared has helped put into words what I often feel ashamed of expressing to people. It’s cool to know that I’m not the only one experiencing this. I genuinely wonder will I ever be vulnerable (or trusting of others) enough to create a community for myself. Specially with folks who don’t view my behaviors as inconsistent or get offended with me not keeping up or having challenges of maintaining relationships.
Honestly, I realized recently that if it’s so hard - there is no corner of your social circle that you truly enjoy and trust. Sometimes I find people who just light me up and sometimes I feel like im making myself socialize and it’s an important distinction! If you don’t like any of people to truly want connection - they are just not for you Let them go, don’t push yourself to enjoy any of it, it’s not your truth and it’s not the only choice It’s okay to have a Hermit moment and find truth in yourself
I understand where you are coming from. I used to feel that way too but then one day it clicked and I was like, “if people are too shallow and dense to make baseless assumptions about me because I’m not interested in being overly extroverted or open in terms of first impressions, then they can save me the headache and cheese it up with the next chump.” I’m at peace with it now.
Sis! I feeeel you! I just want to be quiet until I don’t…I know my clients probably think I don’t like them…so relatable…you’re stunning, that top is cute!
I know how you feel, what i realized is most people don't value peace over constant emotional stimulation. Boring to people is being mature enough to be happy with someone in silence, just enjoying energy. My friends have this they dont need me to hit them back all the time because they know me and know i love from a deep place.
It feels bad knowing i dont like reaching out to people and intimatly having them be a part of my life It feels like I'm wrong and a bad person for being like this, like there's something wrong with me
I feel you, i don't know how to talk anymore, how to start a conversation, anytime it happens i hate it because my mind becomes blank and i can't contribute shit to a convo, however tbh i wish i could, i envy people who can easily make new friends, another thing is everytime I'm quiet around people they assume i myst be scary or loud, theres so much anticipation then i start to talk, then i start to get a little comfortable i start to make some sarcastic jokes then they think I'm crazy or weird which makes me regret ever talking to them.
Sis don't hate yourself! That body is the only thing that your soul has as accommodation on this earth. You look cool and awesome, surely you're unique and that can also intimidate other people and make them say bad/nasty things to you or about you. Don't take it to heart, it doesn't define you: it's mostly momentary things. Everyone has insecurities but they all come momentarily and we need not to hold on to them by taking other people's opinions into consideration, especially those that trigger our isecurities
I resonated a lot with the insecurities you discussed in this video. Especially when it comes to keeping a conversation going with someone. Like I don't want to be the main one invested in it but also just want to avoid the silence. Hahaha I can only tolerate silence if someone vibe makes me comfortable enough to not have to talk and I hardly come across people like that.
For what it’s worth you aren’t awkward boring at all. Not to devalidate your feelings, I totally get the feeling it ain’t fun. People forget things so quickly these days. When you feel like being social and crazy again, no one will even say anything. Life has a way of just being fine, and you will figure out what you’re working through. Best of luck to you
The best thing I can say is “Just Stop” However you’re thinking/ talking about situations and just enjoy enjoy you enjoy people in just places just for the sake of it take whatever you think the situation is supposed to be and let it go. Easier said than done but like anything it takes practice whether we know it or not we practice who we are everyday so if we want something new we have to practice new
THANK YOUUU FOR SAYING THISSS 2:24 This is exactly how I feel I just could not figure out how to put it into words!! U just unlocked something for me!!
girl you are strikingly beautiful. I was literally thinking that the whole video but unfortunately its normal for young girls to be insecure for no reason :(
Okay. You're still very young and it takes time to figure some of this out. You have worth. You're a pretty young lady and I pray that God puts people in your life that you don't have to wear a mask for. You're doing great. Hang in there.
Am glad we got to experience this together, I feel like as I get older my Dissociative side is getting the better of me. I can relate. You are not weird at all am 25 and my social skill set is non-existent.
We all find you interesting enough to listen to this video fully. It's not your job to be someones entertainment. You are enough and people who enjoy your energy will stay around
![BOWKYLION - วิงวอน (ex-change) [Official MV]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/cLdnZWDaO-w/mqdefault.jpg)
“every social gathering feels like im being held hostage” WORDD
lol this is so true
really esp in the work place
I can relate to that. When people invite me to a party, I always have to find an excuse. When it’s my birthday, there is a big chance that nasty people might turn up and I hide in the mountains! Greetings from Germany
Same
I literally paused the video LOL'd and liked the vid. Made my day!
"I really enjoy shuting the f*k up and not talking to ppl"
Iconic ❤
Connections do feel like an absolute chore
They are in part, but that’s how love works, like it takes sacrifice. It takes romance in the mundane. It takes choosing every time which is really hard when cycles are seen as so negative. But we can’t change without giving ourselves to something.
Connections where u can be yourself is a freeing experience, once you’re pretending It’s a chore. Free yourself, and you’ll embrace intimacy with others
@@pinkwallshow do you free yourself?
@@zakerawhite even in times when being free is frightening, when you face your fears such as insecurity it doesn’t exist anymore. Honesty frees you as well, we tend to wear masks and forget that people are just like us lol, in all aspects try to make light of any situation you’re in, don’t reject how you feel.
The truth is that you’re always free, fear just blinds you, start off with facing fears by combating it with faith and confidence. As well as how well do you know yourself? How can you free yourself if you don’t know them? First, when you love and know who you are wholeheartedly, bring “free” is the bare minimum as to how powerful you truly are. I recommend reading Neville Goddard, personally I have faith in God which has helped me, I sought after God and found myself. I’m aware that not everyone is keen to religion/spirituality, but it has helped me!
@@pinkwallshow do u even free yourself
“I’m insecure about how much I can contribute to the world around me” Same bro same
As someone who is also socially reserved and feels uninteresting I think we can’t tell how interesting we are because we spend so much time alone with ourselves consumed by our thoughts and hobbies that they become dull to us. We forget there’s only one of us and other people don’t have the “luxury” of experiencing us all the time so we are new and interesting to them xx
Lately I’ve been having the same kind of fear that I’m just not interesting enough to most people. But I also don’t like the idea of always having to ‘perform’ in order to fit in, or having to try my best to ‘entertain’ someone. I want to be around people who enjoy my company just because, and not just for when they’re bored and no one else is available. I guess my main strife with making friends is that I want deep, meaningful, and long lasting connections but the people I’m around seem to only want to keep things surface level, which I can only go so far with.
I can relate heavily to this because I really don't have many interests that the majority of people are interested in and it's difficult to start conversations with the "normal folk."
right
in my, probably very limited, experience a lot of people want to gossip or share about the people in their lives. i don't even mean gossip in an inherently negative way, but i'm not myself a gossiper even if i like to hear some.
i'm an overthinker who loves film and tv and i get too existential too soon for a lot of people. i don't have a lot to share about my family so i revisit the same topics because they're safe to share. a lot of stuff is dark or would require me giving some long winded backstory. just makes it hard to know what to say or have anything to say
but idk. maybe i'm not as weird as i think. i've had some vulnerable conversations with coworkers. perhaps i'm just all or nothing about connections
@@eg4441this is so real. my “backstory” is way too dark/unpleasant to explain and i hate when people ask cause i feel like they’re gonna interpret it as me trauma dumping and bringing down the mood
I’m awkward yet I don’t want to be because I do enjoy social interaction but I get discouraged socializing because of how awkward and quiet I can be
Same. I want the interactions but I act so damn awkwardly that people clock on that I'm not like them.
"no one can out-hate me" is so real-- but at the same time if you flip the coin "no one can out-love me" ik easier said than done but its something to ponder on for you and I both cus i never would've thought of that if i didn't hear it from your mouth
this is something i always try to explain to people and no one ever understands. people think its absurd that i hate phone calls and that i despise small talk. ive literally said before “ i dont wanna have a social presence everyday “
omggggg 👏🏾👏🏾🙌🏾
When you're feeling anxiety in public sit back in your chair and acknowledge your breathing. Remind yourself that you are beneath no one. Don't give anxiety so much power.
If you don't feel smart in conversation then take your time choosing a response and use simple words to express it.
Thank you. I have screenshot this and will use this tomorrow :)
The reason for my issue with intimacy is that I assume and set an expectation that whoever I let in is going to immediately follow suit or connect with me on that level, and I lack that understanding right in the moment and feel butthurt later, saying to myself that its just not the case babes!
I think I actually have this same issue lol
socially awkward introvert here ❤. Some people come at me as well and say “ you don’t seem introverted to me.”. but it’s because THEY are the talker and I cant ignore them or avoid socializing with them. They never realize I only speak when spoken too.
This is proof that beauty is in the eye of the beholder bc I have always thought ever since I saw you in my recommended, that you were really beautiful. The way you do your brows and your makeup, and your bone structure is stunning in my opinion
This perfectly describes how I feel about myself, I just didn't know how to articulate it. 💔
I love how raw this channel is. I can relate to almost everything that you say.
mann frr
💯. I find social gatherings themselves to be awkward. Many in those gatherings are full of questions sizing each other up. Many boast about themselves and what they have. Gossipers and complainers. The negativity is exhausting. It is in such settings that you can really see the cloaked insecurities of others.
There is strength in being able to be alone. Relying on you. People are highly volatile and unreliable. You just never know if others are trustworthy. It is better to trust in yourself.
Heavy on the going about the day in silence lol. I'm not socially awkward or anything, but simply being quiet is enjoyable to me. I'm one of those people that would love to see the world be quiet for a few days.. lets see what happens lol.
Same, early pandemic felt paradisiacal
Just stumbled on your channel… it saddens me that you feel this way about yourself!! You are unbelievable gorgeous, I find you highly intelligent and interesting. I’m a slightly “older “ women so I could likely be your mom. lol so not trying to preach to you but know I have been where you are. Anywho girl!! Everyone has insecurities even the most confident person. I’m a former performer and have always felt socially awkward even though others didn’t view me as such. I have also struggled with anxiety my entire life!! I just wish for you to be more comfortable in your own skin and realize just you being you is enough contribution to the world! Try to stop beating yourself up and live in your power! Your beautiful energy is needed to raise the vibration of this earth! Know that all the answers don’t come before we are 21… on this journey sometimes we gotta just ride the wave baby girl!!
Everything will work out how it should work out for you. And if someone can’t see your light you should not associate your self with those individuals.
🙏🏾💫💫💫
I guarantee no one on earth is as awkward as me lol. Especially when I go long periods without human contact. Friendships feel like a chore.
Some people have called me weird, others thought I was special.
But in reality is just the unavoidable awkwardness and social anxiety I'm cursed with.
Socializing just feels like a complex jigsaw puzzle that everyone knows how to solve except for me. And for each piece I place in the wrong spot, I'm judged by everyone for 'not figuring out already' 🥲 🔫
I guarantee I'm more awkward than you. I make the whole room awkward
You got it, as soon as I lose human contact, I just forget all the new things I've learned and go back to being myself.
@@m.n8880 I guarantee you aren't. I'm so awkward that even my mannerisms get point out by people.
Oh god. I feel this way so much. I might seem like an extrovert, but my mind goes so fast at one time, and i don’t want to daily
Same. For me, my awkwardness is mainly around women. However, at 30, I am starting to not care. Getting better, day by day.
And by the way, everything you said in this video is TOTALLY ME! It's crazy, I relate to everything. Having friends is so tiring, I loooooove staying by myself, because there's no pressure. BUT, I have one friend and our friendship is low maintenance, meaning that we talk to each others whenever we want (sometimes it's once a month, sometimes more) and nobody takes it personally if we go for a long period of time without talking to each others, because we both understand ourselves, we're both introverted and so that's such a blessing. I hope you'll find a friendship like that because I honestly think that it's the best type of relationships for people like us
I can relate to this. I met up with an old friend after 3 years and I just felt so boring compared to how I used to be. But I realized that I'm just a peaceful person now and that's okay.
Fr I wish I could just turn invisible when I'm in public
It makes sense that vulnerability can make you feel nervous but you’re allowing yourself to be more open. By the way, you are beautiful and very intelligent! You’re being true to yourself. 😊🤙🏽
Are you neurodivergent? I feel exactly the same, my awkward socialisation moments happen at work with my coworkers, and I can tell they think I'm super weird HAHAHA, like I cannot for the life of me speak like a normal human being, I have to ask myself how can I appear normal to them. BUT I noticed that when I was hanging out with neurodivergent people, there was NO pressure to be myself because those people are "weird" in the eyes of society anyways, and so that reliefs a pressure from me and I know that I don't have to play a role with them since they're being their true self without any shame
I try to speak like a normal human being but my sentence structure comes out like I'm a german raised in japan. it's fucking weird and I feel so weird just trying to 'speak normal'. I can type well I just struggle to articulate well.
I literally was thinking the same thing!!! Was waiting to see if anyone said anything first. So I’m glad you said that. I have been diagnosed with ADHD and have been looking into autism as well (but jeezums is it expensive!) But all of these things mentioned have been an experiences I’ve related to in groups that have these neuro-differences. I hope that all of us in these experiences know that we are not alone and we can tribe out together juxtapose or apart❤❤❤
Omg ive found my people. Its actually exhausting
Same I wanted to have friends even went out and met ppl but I realize I feel tired of maintaining it. So I haven’t even spoken to them. Being alone I guess I forgot how much work it required to keep connections. I want to have ppl sometimes but then I just feel tired. Consistency does feel hard for me so idk how to do it for other ppl. I always think I won’t be good enough or appreciated unconditionally.i have a hard time feeling like I need to justify my existence
Girl I was gonna say the opposite abt your features. Literally everything’s is unique. I think ethereal sometimes rocking the short hair the piercings eyebrows etc . Your appearance is definitely different
❤, you are more than enough sweetie. You’ve just got to connect w the right tribe.
This is too real! I also really enjoying shutting tf up and not talking to people.
Your'e absolutely unique and very pretty. Your style is unique and you have a very good faculty of expressing feelings with words. Which is a rare quality , and opening up about your insecurities and genuinely trying to be you without thinking of the opinion of others is the first step to feel better in your own skin and mind. I have never seen someone like you before , the combination of your personality and your appearance is quite perfect.
I would have never tought that girls with short hair would attract me so much, me being a girl with short hair too but im more so a stud. But you are one of these girls with short hair that i find soo pretty and elegant🥰
All I can say is I feel you! So much that I got medicated. Also you will find people that doesn’t make connections feel like a chore. Most people I repel from but I’ve learned how to hone it in the professional world. I feel that when we go through this it’s for a sole purpose in our growth journey. The older I get the more I don’t care about what people say. I embrace the weird and awkwardness because I’m realizing that’s just who I am. People who love you will also embrace it and make conversations easier. Medicated or unmedicated. I love being around people but recently found comfort in just being alone doing the hobbies I love. I also have ADHD and anxiety as well as some autism. I graduated college and beauty school then recently opened a business. Praying it works but girl you got this. All you can do is continue being you. You will find the beauty within every aspect of yourself within due time. ❤ thanks for sharing!
Thank you for your honesty. I feel like this too. I had social anxiety at first, did some exposure therapy and I got better. But now social interactions kind of lost their spice for me now.
Can you tell more? Because I probably feel the same way: When I manage to relax in social situation I often notice that actually I'm a bit bored & don't care to be there. I'm wondering maybe my social anxiety stems from me forcing myself to be in (social) situations where I really don't care to be. Like maybe I'm not insecure and scared of people but my own pressure.
I am the same way we just werent meant to fit in but to stand out ❤ it's ok to be who you where meant to be
you can capture an audience online, youre further ahead than most, i messed up so hard today im boutta die of cringe bruh i cant believe im so incompetent at being a human and having social interactions, this video popping up today is lowkey god sent. i feel you tho, i struggle with the same thing, i want connections but theyre tedious, and i hate vulnerabilty and intimacy but at the same time i want ppl to understand me and for that i gotta open up which i fear. so its not rly that i hate intimacy and connections, i just feel uncomfortable about it. so i just need to figure out why and need to get rid of the fear. i also fear of being boring cus ive been called boring before, even by my crush that shi haunts me to this day its pathetic, I'm a grown man bro. i rly wanna get rid of this inferiority complex or whatever its called idk, but im tired fo feeling like this. im yapping, anyways good video , im definetly gonna check out your channel!
You talking about hating vulnerability and being so much vulnerable at the same time it's crazy 😂
ikr
I’m slowly realizing I am not alone in this journey. I want to free myself from expectations or projected expectations. I just want to exist and not care if I’m interesting enough. While also being extraordinary in my own way.
You helped me because what u can't see in yourself like your striking features/interesting personality ect was the first things i noticed.
My sentiments daily. I try talking myself out of these thoughts but it’s just truly how I feel. However you darling are enough in every way 💫 It’s amazing that we can’t see the beauty of ourselves but outsiders feel completely different. I genuinely think you are gorgeous and I wish I could rock the same type of haircut.
This is how i discovered im neurodivergent, i was diagnosed autistic last year, and when i tell you i RELATE to everything you said!! Word to word. Hands down. 💯
Most people aren’t interesting, but the more you talk to a person just to talk, that makes you more interesting to them, but you avoid that. You’ve got to talk more, regardless of what someone will think.
I Can Relate to This >>>>>>> as a Gemini I come off as Very Social because I Can Communicate Very well and make it easy for people to talk to me!! But if it was Up to me. I would go about my life as a MUTE LOLZ!!! ♥️ then again I’m not even gone LIE, I have spurs of the moment where I just wanna be like a butterfly , social asx Hell ❣️❣️
as a gemini i relate so much 🥲
@@ilovefairiesverymuch4867 it’s Just Our Nature, I Suppose 🥺💞
It takes strength to open up like you have. Thank you for encouraging others to do the same because it is the strength that comes from the heart that heals wounds.
OMG!!! Randomly... X that. Nothing is ever random. I TOTALLY feel you. Your video RESINATES through my SOUL. All my life I've felt that I beat to my own drum. Society would label it as (DIFFERENT) I'm okay with my awkwardness. I guess a part of it is because I'm a EMPATH. Zion NEVER EVER stop being your true Authentic self. One Love ❤️ 🙏🏿💯
thank you for uploading this! i connected to a lot of what you said. i didn't want to admit that connections are a chore, also due to my perceptions of self. i was recently struck with the sad truth that it will naturally be hard for me to beat my loneliness bc i hate connecting with people. ironically, hearing you expressing similar ideas helps me feel more in touch with people.
1:24 I feel you queen✊🏾
Sometimes I feel like the only person on the internet that actually likes interacting with people.
I have to be in the mood lol
@@zions_diary Understandable. I usually have to be in the mood to be by myself, lol
Your honesty is so brave and inspiring, you're def not alone
when you have good people skills it’s hard for ppl to believe that you’d rather be left alone. i go through the same thing
i’ve never had someone verbalize my exact thoughts and behavior in such a profound and understanding manner. thank you for sharing this part of yourself with us
look at you being vulnerable on the internet, you're already on the journey.. you're value is inherent + it gets better w age also (self-compassion is key, your thoughts will lie to you sometimes)
life is hard because i’m shy and awkward but i love talking to people but i feel so uncomfortable doing so 😭😭
Are you joking? You’re STUNNING! Absolutely gorgeous. You’re just an older soul.
please make more videos I love watching them! a few months ago I was feeling EXACTLY like this and I love how you just put words to it and it kind of really healed a part of me, thank you!
You're not in a relationship to give something to someone, you're just there to be you. Everybody is beautiful in it's own way. And you're just beautiful for being you, you do not need to be or offer something else. You need to see and value your beauty as a whole and expect others to see and love you in that way, regardless of your problems or insecurities. Anyways I am just a stranger on the Internet and the Algorithm happened to show me your video. I hope you will find healing and go on your way. You seem like a beautiful person to me and I thank you for making this video.
HEAVILY relatable. It's tough to undestand that you have so many insecurities but no clue how to resolve them. Just know that you're abolutely not alone
Literally from the start of the video I viewed you to be so extremely gorgeous🫶🏽For you to think you have a boring face baffles me to the core….However the socially awkward stand point, insecurities and lack of intimacy portion was so much more relatable than you think. I’m glad you posted this. I feel a lot safer that it isn’t just me….Ive always felt so weird majority of my life. So that whole “I’m my biggest hater” part HIT SO HARD for me. Communication is difficult for EVERYONE I believe. Even if it’s in different ways. Don’t be fooled by the ones who talk smoother than butter. If you don’t have the words to really talk just make it known. Get people to adjust to YOU….Not the other way around
I’m so glad you posted this video, I relate to you so much and I feel less alone now. I wish you nothing but happiness and more growth
This feels like a diary and I love it. I do this all the time and I WOULD NEVER POST THEM , so more power to you sis!
As someone who has felt the same at your age and still does at times I promise you that your relationship with yourself will get better! I would say lean into your imperfections and know that everybody is just as insecure if not more. Most of the time no one is judging you as harshly as you are. I would say keep being brave and vulnerable I believe that’s the key. U seem like a very interesting person!
so glad you decided to post this. everything you’re saying was zapped from my brain
I'm happy you posted the video i think we are all experiencing these feelings and its valid. Everything you said resonated with me
Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable. Self-reflection and adaptation is a super power that most people never harness, but you are well on your way. The way you think is more interesting than any shallow conversation you could have with just anybody, keep going deeper. Treat it as a filter and trust the right people will attract themselves to you as you self-actualize.
Best wishes on your journey. Grant yourself the grace of time, things happen as they should ❤
Just do what you feel. Society has so many pressures that make us feel like we have to do or say certain things when… we don’t. It takes time and accountability to get to where you want to be. There’s this book How to Be an Adult id recommend. It is safe to be who you are and no need to show up as an expectation
I stopped masking and I have no friends now but I do feel happy. I have family and my partner so they fulfil me a lot , but I am lonely I just want to have a friend to chat silly stuff with but I’m not good enough at friendships I guess. Hopefully things will get easier now we are all becoming so much more open. Thank you for sharing.
It can only get better from here.✨✨😁
You sound like you're on the right track. A lot of what you describe sounds like masking and it's an exhausting task. In order for social things to not feel like a chore you have to let yourself relax and breathe and let go of that obligation to present a certain way or talk a certain amount, at least when you're with certain people.
I'm really happy you posted this, its hella relatable and it made me feel understood for a minute!
What you’ve shared has helped put into words what I often feel ashamed of expressing to people. It’s cool to know that I’m not the only one experiencing this. I genuinely wonder will I ever be vulnerable (or trusting of others) enough to create a community for myself. Specially with folks who don’t view my behaviors as inconsistent or get offended with me not keeping up or having challenges of maintaining relationships.
spoke to my soul
Honestly, I realized recently that if it’s so hard - there is no corner of your social circle that you truly enjoy and trust. Sometimes I find people who just light me up and sometimes I feel like im making myself socialize and it’s an important distinction! If you don’t like any of people to truly want connection - they are just not for you
Let them go, don’t push yourself to enjoy any of it, it’s not your truth and it’s not the only choice
It’s okay to have a Hermit moment and find truth in yourself
I understand where you are coming from. I used to feel that way too but then one day it clicked and I was like, “if people are too shallow and dense to make baseless assumptions about me because I’m not interested in being overly extroverted or open in terms of first impressions, then they can save me the headache and cheese it up with the next chump.” I’m at peace with it now.
Sis! I feeeel you! I just want to be quiet until I don’t…I know my clients probably think I don’t like them…so relatable…you’re stunning, that top is cute!
I know how you feel, what i realized is most people don't value peace over constant emotional stimulation. Boring to people is being mature enough to be happy with someone in silence, just enjoying energy. My friends have this they dont need me to hit them back all the time because they know me and know i love from a deep place.
Nothing wrong with being awkward. It's all good. :)
Hey im 20 i feel the same way im gonna start making vids now cuz i thought no one else would resonate
It feels bad knowing i dont like reaching out to people and intimatly having them be a part of my life
It feels like I'm wrong and a bad person for being like this, like there's something wrong with me
You’ve summed up a feeling I didn’t know yet, you’ve put what I’ve felt in accurate words
I feel you, i don't know how to talk anymore, how to start a conversation, anytime it happens i hate it because my mind becomes blank and i can't contribute shit to a convo, however tbh i wish i could, i envy people who can easily make new friends, another thing is everytime I'm quiet around people they assume i myst be scary or loud, theres so much anticipation then i start to talk, then i start to get a little comfortable i start to make some sarcastic jokes then they think I'm crazy or weird which makes me regret ever talking to them.
Sis don't hate yourself! That body is the only thing that your soul has as accommodation on this earth. You look cool and awesome, surely you're unique and that can also intimidate other people and make them say bad/nasty things to you or about you. Don't take it to heart, it doesn't define you: it's mostly momentary things. Everyone has insecurities but they all come momentarily and we need not to hold on to them by taking other people's opinions into consideration, especially those that trigger our isecurities
I feel you with this video
my autistic ass relates to this so hard
We love & appreciate your honesty!
I resonated a lot with the insecurities you discussed in this video. Especially when it comes to keeping a conversation going with someone. Like I don't want to be the main one invested in it but also just want to avoid the silence. Hahaha I can only tolerate silence if someone vibe makes me comfortable enough to not have to talk and I hardly come across people like that.
For what it’s worth you aren’t awkward boring at all. Not to devalidate your feelings, I totally get the feeling it ain’t fun. People forget things so quickly these days. When you feel like being social and crazy again, no one will even say anything. Life has a way of just being fine, and you will figure out what you’re working through. Best of luck to you
The best thing I can say is “Just Stop” However you’re thinking/ talking about situations and just enjoy enjoy you enjoy people in just places just for the sake of it take whatever you think the situation is supposed to be and let it go. Easier said than done but like anything it takes practice whether we know it or not we practice who we are everyday so if we want something new we have to practice new
THANK YOUUU FOR SAYING THISSS 2:24 This is exactly how I feel I just could not figure out how to put it into words!! U just unlocked something for me!!
I have a lot of shared insecurities and it really helps to talk to someone who can just be real with you.
I feel like this is such a libra thought pattern - I have a libra moon so I can relate
Girl maintaining connection feels like an absolute chore for me too🥹❤️
You’re a rare gem! ✨💎
Know who you really are underneath how you feel about yourself and how other people feel about you.
girl you are strikingly beautiful. I was literally thinking that the whole video but unfortunately its normal for young girls to be insecure for no reason :(
Okay. You're still very young and it takes time to figure some of this out. You have worth. You're a pretty young lady and I pray that God puts people in your life that you don't have to wear a mask for. You're doing great. Hang in there.
I've never heard someone vocalize the way I feel so well.
"true intelligence seems awkward" - Lao Tzu 😊much love & peace 2 u😊
Am glad we got to experience this together, I feel like as I get older my Dissociative side is getting the better of me. I can relate. You are not weird at all am 25 and my social skill set is non-existent.
So glad you posted this. I relate heavily ❤
We all find you interesting enough to listen to this video fully. It's not your job to be someones entertainment. You are enough and people who enjoy your energy will stay around