He just said it in my watch and it crushed me. I love D’Angelo a lot. I just learned of him 3 weeks ago and this is my first time seeing him like this. I hope he finds strength, peace and most of all happiness.
Happiness is within yourself and for yourself. Some may seek happiness from others but really only you know what you like and what can make you smile. I used to be depressed for many years, but after contemplating for a very long time. I realized I am the only one that rules over my own emotions.
Yeah I decided a long time ago that I don't need to be busy all the time or prove my worth with my time. I am allowed to just sit and relax and not feel guilty.
I see depression the same way I see my chronic illnesses. Sometimes its in remission, sometimes it flares. The most important thing is that no one extreme will last forever 💜
Thank you so much for this comparison and reminder. I never thought about depression that way before. I'm currently going through a flare up and I really did need to be reminded that it won't last forever.
ooh i feel this way about my OCD! it flares up but it cools down and it's just gonna be like that for life but I'm gonna get better at recognizing and coping with it with time
This is my first ever TH-cam comment. I've never engaged with TH-cam ever. Never liked videos, rarely subscribed, and definitely never commented. I had to "create a channel" just to do this. But I felt the overwhelming need to because of how this video absolutely wrecked me (in the best way possible?) I'm almost 23 and I have experienced so many similar things when it comes to my depression. I remember being 9 years old and terrified of the future because I couldn't understand how I could keep going with so much pain. But I did keep going. Last May I was in the hospital for a SA (edit: trying to unalive myself). But I'm still here. Which means I have a 100% success rate. Even after being at the lowest point of my life. Hearing everything I've felt before in my life so eloquently said made me sob and it was exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for this video. It means so much to me and so many people. ❤
agh, hate how much i relate to both u and d’angelo (in the way that i wish no one the same experiences i have i mean). im so sorry u were put through something so disgusting and EXTREMELY traumatizing so recently, yet i am SO so relieved to see u still being so hopeful and believing in urself despite such recent trauma. im so glad ur ok!! please dont force urself tho, its ok to not be ok, as cringe and cheesy as that is now to say lol
@@aquademoney Oh my god I'm so sorry for the misunderstanding. I didn't mean I was assaulted. I meant that I tried to off myself. I should have realized how that would come across. It was still very traumatic, and I really appreciate your kind words, but I definitely should have worded that differently
@@Saprina289 OMG IM SO SORRY LMAO😭😭 i mean i still relate to that too and im still proud of u so the only thing that doesnt apply is the “disgusting” part so wtv it still goes basically lol. im glad ur still here btw
Chronic depression is so deeply misunderstood, this is a very honest and accurate view of the reality of those of us like yourself, with chronic depression.
the way he titled the video is really great, pulling in people who feel this way and making us feel understood. feeling alone in this is one of the worst parts and it feels like this video was made with that in mind, no parasocial but man do i appreciate that.
I wish we could have this kind of honesty in mental healthcare settings. Unpleasant idea, but I truly think a lot more people would still be here if they hadn’t been told “We have to beat you down and force you to lie about your experiences so we can call you cured” by people who were supposed to help.
i don't think i've ever even seen this perspective even though i've been around the world of psychiatry for sooo long. i related to it so much. a lot of the depression support stuff feels aimed at people with ultimately temporary periods of depression. the more common thing to go through. i've been depressed since i was at least 6 years old. i've only ever been depressed, that's all i know... so yeah i never related to the "it gets bettter" stuff either. but maybe that actually is okay. we don't need to be bitter over that. just do your best and keep trucking along.
Actually, there is a lot more to it; it's not just depression, and sometimes despair is a symptom of underlying issues which remain unaddressed for many people. There are a whole lot of issues like IBS, Genetic conditions, familial abuse which need to be considered in understanding what existence is, because these diseases end up paving the wrong path for many, rendering their experience of life insipid and full of misery, sadly.
This video is so relatable for me as someone who was diagnosed with chronic depression and anxiety. I can't plan my next 10 years, but I know I can take it 1 day at a time. It's exhausting, but I'm still here.
“I have a 100% success rate.” Wow. Yes you do. That’s so powerful. Perspective is everything. Thank you for sharing this with us D’Angelo. Sending you love and support.
I think the hardest part of depression is the self-awareness. Most people go through life without thinking they have something that needs to be addressed or just avoid addressing it. It’s important to take care of yourself and not be afraid to ask for help. Identifying the symptoms is the first step to knowing when you need to protect your peace. To anyone reading this, I’m wishing you well on your journey.
@@JessicaLaShawn I teared up throughout this entire video. I don’t have the words to fully express how incredible this is and how powerful the perspective he articulated is. I’m so moved.
That really stuck out to me. I recently started college. I kept telling myself it’ll be a fresh start and I’ll actually be able to make friends and live an admirable life. But I still haven’t met anyone there and I constantly feel swamped and burnt out by the workload. I finally broke down last night, telling myself I was a failure. “Why is this so hard for me but seemingly not for anyone else?” But after hearing him say he has a 100% success rate, I realized that no matter how hard it’s gotten, I do too. I’m proud of myself and everyone else who is just able to get through each day, the good, the bad, and the terrible. I am sending love and support to anyone reading this
The comment about having a 100% success rate on getting through your toughest days is so powerful. We really need to give ourselves the credit we deserve in order to give ourselves the confidence we need to keep marching.
I've been doom scrolling and chronically online for the last two years almost constantly to drown out the noise of my brain and to distract me from the sadness I feel. This was the first thing in months to make me stop and actually listen because it is word for word what I've been feeling, and you look at it in a way that I never considered. Incredibly profound. Thank you
To me, depression is like grief. You can’t “get over” grief, you just make room for it. Some days you almost forget its even there, and others its the only thing you can think about. Thank you for showing us this vulnerability, and know that you speaking about this makes people feel less alone. Sending everyone who’s reading this love. Keep that 100% success rate up y’all!
I read something somewhere that said the grief doesn't get smaller the room around it grows, and yeah I agree that's exactly what it feels like with depression too. *It* doesn't change *I* do
Literally cried watching this. I’m 25. I’m in the same boat as you D’Angelo. Thank you for being open & vulnerable. Thank you for everything that you do.
I'm 25 as well. I feel lighter for the other comment that I made. People expect so much but why can't they just give me time. In my case, give one of the chores to my lazy ass of a sibling. I will be thinking on your comment!
Absolutely same, this felt like a narration of my life, and coming to the comments to see how many of us all relate to this made me sob even more. This is such a collective experience, yet it feels so isolating when we're in the middle of it.
Jesus CHRIST, I’ve been feeling this for over a decade and I’m only 25. You spoke directly to my very core. Only difference is, I’m still struggling with accepting it. My life is so mundane and shitty, despite me trying to achieve my goals. I truly have no idea why I’m still here, with everything going wrong in my life. I kept having to pause the video because your words kept stabbing me like a knife. Especially the ‘100%’ success rate thing. I’ve never thought about it like that. That made me cry. I’m still fucking WINNING. I’m never gonna forget that. Never. You’ve no idea how much this video helped me, some random ass stranger. Life feels like a black hole, but this video was a very tiny, very faint, very fleeting ray of light. I’m gonna come back every now and then and rewatch this, because I also know I’ll never get better. Thank you for this. Genuinely.
Not to get all parasocial here, but you're touching my heart. Not a therapist, but I am a Mom, and just want to wrap you in a massive virtual hug right now. Such a special person. It really is a huge problem when you want to be happy but know you have misguided chemicals in your brain that won't let that happen. Me too. I've learned to adjust what my perception of "happy" is, and that's helped me so far. I've made it to 54 years old now. Yes, we win!
@@Seeker7257 it's something that weighs on me more now that I'm 21. Im not as financially stable as the average 25-30 year old, but I think about what my life will be in the future if I only live to work. I'm just starting to accept that I'll have to do annoying hard work if I want the money to truly enjoy my life. With games, art and my cat(s).
I'm actually probably bringing this up in my next therapy session. I'm 37 and still fighting to "feel happy," maybe dude is just way ahead of me... But I will definitely discuss with my therapist first because I tend to jump at answers. "YES THIS WILL FIX IT!!!" -style. But yeah... This is very VERY much what I'm going through. And even with kind, open and supportive friends? The most we get into is "I'm depressed." "Me too." "I'm in therapy." "Yeah, I'm taking medication." That feels so, so open and daring and brave. This? This is effing heroic.
I'm 70 this year, and have been draggin' this thing around since... like FOREVER? Finally got some attention and some therapy in 1968, when I was 14. Got some meds later, got different ones. Got different "diagnoses", to label whatever. You end up knowing you just get through it. "Live through this". I think you're swell. Not letting Mom down was always a big reason. Now I just have other reasons. A guy, some cats. I'm amazed to be this old, feel like it can't be true. My only big fear is dementia. Other than that, I can hang in here until whenever. It gets better, it gets worse, it gets boring, it gets terrifying. It means nothing, or does it just mean you tried your best. I approve and share, so far, your 100% success rate. Many people think you're swell. Hang in there!!
Hello fellow stranger! Dementia is a very real fear for those of us with a history of depression. I took care of my grandma who had Alzheimer's. Some people with dementia like having things that remind them of the day (TV shows, calendars, alarms) while there were people like my grandma who got upset if the day didn't match the "day in her head". As with depression, there are various ways to deal with it based on medical advice and our own experiences. The most important thing is to surround yourself with people who understand you! Cats and dogs help a lot as well. My pets were never trained to be service animals but they could pick up on my depressed states. Let's keep living through this!
“I have a 100% success rate” really hit me as someone else who suffers with bad stints of depression and always has looked for that ‘fix’ to it. Thank you for that.
No matter what happens tomorrow, that person who feels like they can't get up is still going to be here. And that makes them a fucking legend. A fucking legend. Every day they choose to stay and face the world, they prove their strength. Don't disappoint yourself--you've already made it this far. Legend. You’re a legend, Emily, go to sleep and wake up in the morning, knowing that 💕
Sometimes there doesn’t need a “fix” necessarily. there is just perspective, because instead of beating yourself up, it’s all about perspective. like he said “i have a 100 percent success rate” which gives you perspective that you’ve made it through your hardest days, which you should be proud of yourself for! additionally, especially with therapy, it is finding a way to more healthily manage depression. finding ways that make it easier to go about your day to day activities without letting it dominate you, and learn healthier coping skills that makes it easier to exist and that comes in baby steps, because change doesn’t happen in leaps.
I don’t think anyone ever really “beats” depression; we just sort of figure out how to move through the world with the burden. Some days it feels lighter, some days it’s way too heavy. But we always carry it. Sending you so much love, D’Angelo ❤️🩹
The best way to make depression easier is to socialize and be more present in your community. Make friends, talk to the cashier, go get food in person instead of through doordash. Go to community events in your neighborhood. You can do this even if you’re a shy, introverted or socially anxious person. Practice makes perfect. It might be hard at first but the more you socialize, the better you are at it and the easier it gets. Even something as simple as saying hi to people on the street and smiling, maybe even giving them a compliment will make your day a little better.
I'm gonna add a caveat here and say I agree with you in terms of, like, chronic depression - MOST forms of depression, really. But I will also say that SOMETIMES, depression can in itself be a symptom of something else, and sometimes it's GENUINELY just your brain chemistry out of wack. I was diagnosed with depression in my mid-twenties and started on antidepressants, and within one month I could GENUINELY FEEL how my brain chemistry was slowly evening out. I stayed on antidepressants for just THREE MONTHS and then I stopped (alongside my doctor ofc), and it was just. Gone. Poof, like it never was there. Now, there was a whole host of other things that remained - I later got an ADHD diagnosis, I'm battling chronic fatigue, there's a bunch of stuff, so like. Am I doing GREAT? Nah. But that very specific way my mind operated for the three years prior to me starting antidepressants was gone, and it has not returned. So you're absolutely right, some days are harder and some are lighter. Most of the time, it's not about being 'fixed', but learning to live with the way your brain and body is. But sometimes, very rarely, your brain chemistry just needs to be shook up enough that it can settle itself again. My point of this story isn't to make light of depression or, like, humble-brag. My point is that I hope you, whoever might read this comment, seek help to the best of your ability, in the ways you can. Because the chance that your dark thoughts has an easy solution is small, but it EXISTS. And even if the easy solution doesn't work for you, it still means you've taken a big step towards figuring it out a little better, and I'm proud of you. We have a 100% success rate, guys. Let's keep that streak going. ❤
Serotonin is produced in the gut. Taking probiotics,reducing gluten intake and increasing the consumption of raw fruits and vegetables has been working for me, people have to see what works for them. Also halt ruminating thoughts, mediation does help!
Some ppl do. Some ppl genuinely cure their depression, even those that have it for decades. I know this bc I know ppl who this was true for, i know a woman who lived with depression for DECADES but when she was about 30 she got ECT for her ptsd and it suprisingly cured her depression, its been 20 years since, and she hasnt even gone into remission. And it's important to remember that some ppl do cure their depression, bc "i will always be depressed" is often the thought that leads ppl to suicide. Im depressed and I know Id kms if I genuinely honest to god believed that. And Im glad that thats not the case for everyone, Im glad some ppl can accept that they might always be depressed. But I wish that we wouldnt spread the idea that thats the case for everyone, its incredibly harmful to depressed ppl who are already feeling suicidal due to the belief that theyll never get better.
At 76 years old, I can relate to your sentiments. I've pondered over your comment and have journeyed through a myriad of emotions. To be honest, I'm uncertain of how happiness truly feels; contentment is the emotion that predominates for me. I'm at a juncture in life where many might claim happiness due to a successful career, two adult children who are thriving, and two teenage grandchildren who are doing well. Am I happy? No, but I am content. My wish for you is enduring contentment.
@@439801RS, what each person needs and finds acceptable to continue in their life journey varies significantly. Clearly, being content is enough for me, and my point is just to offer my experience as only one alternative view. I hope that you find what you need to keep you active and involved for the next 46 years.
@@439801RSI don't present my perspective as universal. It has certainly been beneficial for me. My sole point is that not all of us seek happiness. I hope you have or will find whatever you need to navigate the next 40 years. Best wishes.
Ugh. I hate "It gets better" or "You'll feel better tomorrow". Reassurance negates and invalidates legitimate feelings and puts pressure on the person to live up to those reassurances. If I could say anything to ppl who don't deal with depression, please don't reassure a depressed person. Listen, hug, and try to understand. As a random person on the internet, I'm proud of you D'Angelo. Thanks for being you.
The most legitimately reassuring thing to say is “I’m here for you”. You’re not making assumptions about the other person’s life and how their mental health works, but you are saying they have someone to lean on when or if they need it.
But its the truth. I used to never think it would get better. It honestly does. Its up to you to hold on and create the when. It’s hard but thats what it is. It took so many years for me to understand.
I could write an essay explaining why, but I'll just keep it short and say that I really needed this video today. Thanks, D'Angelo, for being this open and honest.
i feel this way all the time, the struggle with realizing that there isn't a way to just be "better" and "fix" your depression, and sometimes you just have to be okay with never being fully okay.
i adore the mindset of no longer obsessing over being “fixed” as a person. implying one can “be fixed” as an individual enforces the idea that there’s right and wrong ways to be alive. it’s important to realize you were never broken to begin with, you simply are a human being dealing with internal struggles others don’t have to face as consistently as you do
@@toastytoritillaYeah. It's about being more accepting towards yourself. Sometimes, just getting out of bed is a victory, and you should celebrate it instead of beating yourself over it.
Hard disagree. It takes a while but depression does eventually go away fully. Doesn't mean you're never sad but I went from constant crushing depression that lasted over a decade and a half to being pretty optimistic over the course of about 5 years. Life ain't that great to me honestly but I'm just happy to be alive and to have what I have. My humble recommendation is quit using twitter and similar sites, divorce yourself from online and media discourse, avoid parasocial bonds, help people you know irl without expecting anything, and reject anything to do with self help gurus like it's the plague. That's just my opinion though. Hopefully things get better for ya soon friend
33 years old. Been on and off antidepressants since 11 or 12 years old. I hadn't planned to make it to 30. I literally have a whiteboard planner in my room with ONE DAY AT A TIME written on it. Thank you for speaking so honestly and frank.
Happened to stumbled across this video and am so grateful. I am 31 and have had moderate to severe depression since I was about 12. One of my grandparents and my dad both committed suicide so it runs in my family. I’ve been having the worst episode I’ve ever had the last few months and have been struggling with asking myself “why has it never gotten better? Is it always going to keep getting worse?” I found so much comfort and motivation in watching this video. Thank you 💛
Very well said. It is a constant somewhere in the room, but I've been able to put it in my periphery instead of staring directly at it head on most days now. Like the person above, therapy has also been an immense help
Living in anything but wealth under capitalism is pretty miserable. Like meaningless endless depression. It’s a attitude that has to overcome all of the things we lack that our society won’t provide
@@EmmsRealityso true and most of us in the west have no connections here and therefore no purpose. Like my whole purpose before was trying to make life better ij my country. Now i live in canada and frankly don’t give a fuck about this place😅
"I have a 100% success rate". I saved this to watch when I felt more stable, and I'm glad I did. Really appreciate you sharing your perspective, D'Angelo. I just had my 27th birthday, and I'm filled with a vague sense of peace. I've been feeling so lost and confused, looking for 'the point'. Closure is a myth. I'm glad I'm still here, and so proud of myself for coming this far. Keeping trying is SO hard, but I WILL keep trying. Big love & a highfive to anyone who resonates xx
it's crazy hearing someone i look up to say so confidently and honestly the exact words i tell myself daily. "i've lived through every single day of my life, i'm winning", "i'm proud of myself for living in spite of never figuring it out", "i'll never experience happiness like i thought i would.. and i'm truly and genuinely happy with that". these are all realizations i JUST had this year. so hearing... idk, outside confirmation? that i'm not alone in feeling comfortable in my depression since it's not going away? wow. thank you d'angelo, truly.
@@sidneygordon2804because it just is. because we're humans with a condition. why are twins sometimes born conjoined, why do people get cancer, why are some people born rich, why are kids dying in wars. why do people die in plane crashes. because life is random and bad things happen to good people. but unless your going to unalive yourself, you carry on and win at life every day because you keep going despite things feeling awful. and I know it so hard to get over the 'why me' attitude because I still think that every day, it sucks, but other people have their shit, different shit to us, but their own shit. it's freeing in a way to realise that
Yup, im in college and sometimes i look around and see everyone making new friends but it just seems to not be that easy for me. Hopefully i can learn to come out of my comfort zone and connect with someone
I have this too! I’ve always had a really hard time to make new friends I always need time to kinda process. I’ve started my second year in uni now and I’ve only now started to connect to two people in my class.
you can do it !! i entered college thinking im gonna be as alone as i have been since forever but i somehow made what may be my friends for life. it really does get better
I’m in the exact same boat with college. I guess it’s good to know I’m not the only one (obviously I’m not the only one, but it’s different when someone else explicitly says exactly what’s on your mind).
you really have me crying in the middle of michaels rn but for real "i have a 100% success rate" is gonna be my new motto (and so many other things you have said). thank you for making this video. sometimes these types of videos are the ones i actually find helpful and encouraging and optimistic in a realistic way
I'm 31 with chronic depression and my dad has a conversation with me yesterday about how I just need to "get over it", because I'm "pretty and intelligent and am well liked in my community" and "things aren't that bad". I'm so tired of trying to explain it to people. It's a literal brain chemistry imbalance. I can't use positive thinking to fix it. I'm not simply having a bad day, or feeling sad, or being antisocial or grumpy or whatever. MY BRAIN IS LITERALLY FIGHTING ME AT ALL TIMES!!!
Wooow lol the gall to tell you to stop doing something that's happening to you? I wish people would stop seeing it that way. My dad also only believed in problems that could be solved with a belt, and I've never been happier than when I stopped talking to him and focused on my peace.
Thanks for saying this ❤ the past 5 years have been the worse for me, and to this day, my depression isn't letting up. It's not getting easier as I get older. It's getting worse. But it comes in waves. It's nice knowing we aren't alone.
I decided a while ago that I don't owe anyone a "reasonable" explanation about depression. If they've never felt it, good for them, but I don't have to make them understand. And I don't need them to understand. I don't talk to my father about mental health, I know where I can and can't go into the topic with my mom and other than that I have my therapist and a close friend who knows what it's like. Everybody else - not my problem. At this point my mantra is: if you don't understand depression, just be grateful you don't.
@@francookie9353 I think I struggle a lot with that...which adds to my anxiety of trying to explain to people why I am unhappy, why I've not reached out to them for months, why I am so damn depressed. I always feel terrible because I have a lot of good friends in my life, but trying to maintain those relationships WHILE having such chronic depression is so fucking hard because I do feel like I owe them a reason for why I am the way I am, why I disappear, etc. I don't want to lose them, but it's so so hard to foster relationships when you're like this...bc I don't want it to be anyone else's issue.
Oh yeah, all the time. But happiness is not really an achievable state. Its a fleeting feeling that you can't sustain. These days I aim for stable and functioning with my depression. One of the hardest parts with chronic conditions is accepting that you will have to keep working at it and will never be "fixed".
I think I've learned in my 35 years that the key is to ride the waves. Enjoy the happiness when it comes and accept the sadness when it comes. We just have to be aware when the sadness is lasting for too long. If it's not naturally ebbing and flowing it might be a sign that you need a little more help, possibly from something in the pharmaceutical realm.
@AdaezeNjoku-rx3dl I guess for me, it's being able to function (go to work, clean my house, keep up with bills, personal hygiene, etc.) despite the stresses of life. When I'm depressed, I can't keep up with the tasks I need to function well and stress triggers the thought "I need to die" rather than "I can deal with this problem after I de-stress."
Right, yeah but often times when people say "I want to be happy" they don't mean a constant state of positive input, they mean they have the space to be happy, and enjoy it when happiness does come. "I want to be happy" means "i want it to be worth it, I want to be content" It means they want a more positive baseline. Saying "it's not an achievable state" is like responding to someone with a chronic illness saying they want to be healthy with "well you cant always be healthy, people get sick all the time"
00:15 Absolutely. I think some people don't really understand depression. When you have tried therapy, eating better, working out, socializing more, and medication; yet you still wake up feeling exhausted and happiness drains from your face after mere moments because the fleeting happiness gave way to brokenness again and when everyday feels like lifting weights just to stand up out of bed; it's like you just know it won't go away. I too thought it was things like success, or a relationship that would take that away. But no. It's something I've accepted will always be there, and I just try to put on a good face so those around me can maintain their own happiness. The acceptance though, has helped. It's helped me become numb enough to just keep going. Which is better than not going at all. A lot of people don't understand depression, because they don't understand how different our lives are from theirs. Honestly, I'm happy for them.
Meditation is the only thing that has made significant impact on my happiness. The ability to drop mental activity and sink into pure being is bliss. The human ego is suffering.
Damn man, that words my feelings well. But I hope that we can both make it through. It’s never out of it, but through is an option. Honestly I may be breathing and working harder out of spite for those that don’t understand me but there’s no reason that motive can’t lead to me helping people a lot. Just like you said, doing it for others. I feel like that too.
I don't really know what to write. Not sure how this made me feel. Definitely made me tear up. I'm 31 and gonna be 32 this December. I'm very lost in life right now but you're right that I should be proud of myself for making it this far. I'm proud of you too. I've been in and out of therapy most of my life and the first time I tried medication it truly changed my life for the better but sadly I went too long without it and became immune. So now I guess I should accept what you have accepted. That I just need to learn to live like this.
"It did not get easier, I just got better at dealing with it" Wow, that really hit me. Thank you for posting this, I truely needed to hear this right now. I've been struggling with depression for years and have been slowly but surely improving. Sometime I get moments where everything feels like it's crashing down and I'm bavk at rock bottom, but now I can pick myself back up and keep going. Thank you for sharing this part of you, it has such a positive impact.
d’angelo i woke up like 45 min ago i wasn’t ready for this mental breakdown 😭 i know that other people feel the way i do but hearing it is so validating and heart wrenching at the same time
thank you for making the content that you do and continuing on through your own personal struggles ❤ your impact on this community and the individuals who consume your content is real and positive
It really is and now I’m sobbing. Hearing my own experience struggling with depression for my whole life from another person really makes me feel not as alone and not as crazy. ❤
“I will never possess what I thought happiness was when I was younger.” Ugh, I relate to this SO much. For a long time, I sought things that seemed to make everyone else happy: college, boyfriend, marriage, mortgage, a kid, a decent 9-to-5 office job where I felt competent and respected, RELIGION, weight loss, friendships, etc. At the end of the day, NONE of those things made me feel better. I still joke that my brain is broken, but what I mean is that I know I’m always going to feel this way. Still, I keep persisting in spite of that (and out of spite sometimes). Consensual hugs to you, D’Angelo, and anyone else who feels this way. It’s tough, and some days are easier than others…but it’s possible. 💛 💛 💛
Your brain isn’t broken for that, other people’s brains are broken. People desperately pursue those things because they feel terrible and they think they will bring relief, but it seems clear to me (as there are rarely truly happy people in any job or marriage, in my experience) that they just pretend it helps because they don’t want to FEEL broken. People do this with many things, including therapy, medicine (both psychiatric and physical), relationships, etc.; if there’s some promise that “x” will help you, but “x” fails to help you, it’s easier to lie to yourself than to think “wow am I just messed up here? why doesn’t this fix me?” I think this is probably why the divorce rate is so high, for example
Yeah. I try to remind myself that these are things that peers have sought out just to find they were essentially unfulfilled or unhappy anyway. Or they weren’t content until they did live life in a way that their community or society in general don’t deem “successful”. Decided to simply do my best and attempt to only do what makes me feel satisfied, or on my way to feeling it. If a relationship doesn’t work out, it’s a blow, but I’ll live. One out of billions. If I lose a job, somewhere else is always hiring until I find something better. It ain’t all shit. Depressive episodes and anxiety don’t make it easy, but while we’re alive, we still have time to change our pursuits and lives, someway somehow. I can only hope there are others out there able to do the same because gaining and internalizing that perspective isn’t easy.
I think it’s also important to note that you can recontextualize your depression. Looking at media constantly seeing images of “happiness” and that being the accepted status quo or baseline operating emotion, trains our brains to always see depression as this socially unacceptable state. In reality, there is nothing “bad” about depression except the way it makes you feel. Feeling bad is not objectively bad in anyway, to me it is just one of the many facets of my being that made, and continue to make me who I am. If anything, just being able to feel at all is special to me, so even in the most debilitating bouts of depression my internal dialogue still combats the notion that feeling like this is “bad”. I find this really helps me grapple with my depression. It does take a lot of effort and I know it will be an active effort for the rest of my life, but what else am I to do😭. Also, it helps me look back on times of complete despair with a kind of appreciation and admiration.
This video’s timing is so surreal for me. Exactly a year ago, my boyfriend passed away from suicide due to depression. D’Angelo, I do want to congratulate you for finding some peace in your search for answers/a “cure” for depression. I really found your discussion about your 100% success rate of making it through each day very inspiring, and it helped me reframe my perspective on my own depression and grief. Thank you. ❤️
I really appreciate that you’ve made this video, as someone who has clinical anxiety and depression. It’s so rare to hear people talk about the reality of mental illnesses and not make it sound so black and white, happy or sad. It’s a complicated burden, but it’s not unmanageable or hopeless.
Speaking as a 50 year old that has had the privilege of riding the depression roller coaster, I agree. Some things don't heal, you just learn to carry them. There are times I'm in a depression and sometimes I'm in recession. Depression does go into recession. I think accepting that and reaching out for help during the down seasons is the way.
“Some things don’t heal, you just learn to carry them.” Preach, sister. I’m pretty young, 24, but I’ve gotten really good at putting up a mask. A little too good, maybe. One time my grandmother was making fun of me for only ever thinking about video games (I don’t remember how the conversation got there, but it was a sort of misunderstanding; I said something she thought was from a game when it wasn’t). I asked her, genuinely, what she thought was on my mind all the time, what I spent my time thinking about. She went “Video games?” Like it was obvious. “Sometimes, yeah, I think about video games. What steps I want to take next, what my strategies will be, sure. But sometimes I think about if my parents are disappointed in me. I think about how much of a failure I must seem to them, how I’m nothing more than dead weight in a world that wants me gone. How I have no real, actual skills, how everyone praises me for an intelligence I know I don’t have. How I can feel the edge of my brain slipping by the day, how problems that were once easy to solve are now too difficult to even begin. I think about how many stories I’d like to tell, how many pictures I’d like to draw or songs I’d like to write, but how I know my perfectionism will get in the way and I never start any of them. Sometimes I think about what everyone else around me is thinking, if they’re staring at me, judging me, whispering or texting about the weird fat guy in the corner. Sometimes I wonder whether or not everyone’s lives would be easier if I weren’t in them, if everyone would be better off if I disappeared. That’s what I think about, and that’s why I play video games; so for a while I don’t think about it.” She then asked me if there was any way she could help, and I told her no one could, and that I knew she was upset, but that was why I never talked about it; because it makes everyone upset and I hate doing that to people. Tl;dr: my grandma made fun of me for not having thoughts in my head so I told her all the thoughts in my head and why I never share them
It’s kind of uncanny how many humans feel this way. It’s almost like somethings… wrong with how we’re made to exist here. That aside I appreciate you posting this because it helped me sort out some of my own thoughts about my chronic depression. I felt so bad after I finally saw some sort of success everyone told me was impossible, but I still wanted to leave. I didn’t let myself stop moving for so long because maybe the next achievement would make me feel better, bought a house, still wanted to leave. I lost it not long after cause of burnout and all this head weight but I think a part of me is always going to want to leave. I honestly don’t know if I’ll always win, but your analogy about having 100% success rate was a good one. This has to be a scary thing to post. I’ve thought about sharing with my community but I’ve been too scared. Thank you for the honesty, and I’m glad you’re still here.
Right People, Wrong Place, August D the last, and the Bible. Damn all RM's albums and suga D cuz depression. I know you don't like them, but hope you give mono a listen. St Paul suffered depression too. We love you. What is happiness? Those moments that make you happy, aren't they happiness?
I wholeheartedly believe something is 100% wrong with how we're made to exist these days. I've been doing a lot of research on past societies and their ways of living, it was just so... Simple. They didn't have nearly the same amounts of stress and factors to worry about that we do today. Yes, their life was not perfect, but everyone was guaranteed a meal at the end of the day. Everyone participated in celebrations and events and recreational time. Everyone was guaranteed a shelter and clothes. Your worth was not measured by the amount of stuff you did that day or how productive you were. You just woke up, did what you needed to do, and went back home for dinner with your family or your community. Their celebrations and festivals would take multiple days. They weren't worried about "oh but I have to work so I can't enjoy myself too much". They just enjoyed themselves. I don't know. I just don't think capitalism combined with the constant temporary dopamine social media provides is good for you. Anyways, I'm sorry for yapping, I'm just very frustrated with modern day society and how anxious it makes me feel on a daily basis.
@@IsuiGtz no I wholeheartedly agree. I basically said the same thing you said but much longer lol. I am fully convinced that the reason why a lot of humans feel this way is because of capitalism and social media.
I’m 20 now and in one of the worst periods in my life. Really needed to hear this. Now that I look back, all those times I wondered how I’d get through another day, I did.
this is a level of honesty you rarely see, online or in person. very well done. I'm in the same situation and I'm in my 30s now. you get used to it, and more than that - you learn. you learn to cope, you learn to deal, you learn to question your head and your environment. I have my dog, I have friends, I have meds that help me. some of the best advice I ever got was 'sometimes it's triage'. meaning, at your worst, figure out the thing that will kill you first - thirst, hunger, lack of sleep. fix that thing. then move on to the next, and the next. the sun will rise, and we will try again.
@danielafurtado5095 they do, once you learn to look at them a little different. I learned to communicate clearly what I want and need, and ask others to do the same. A lot of miscommunication can be avoided by being clear and honest (in a kind way!) instead of expecting others to intuit what you may need, you know?
@@drunkhyena Totally. It’s not fair to expect anyone to read your mind … it’s nice when people “just get you”, that only happens when they’ve been around you enough times to pick up on your patterns. I don’t have chronic depression. I’ve had really bad anxiety since 2018/19. The question for me isn’t “Will I ever be happy?”. It’s “Will I ever chill? And feel calm?” And I find that I do feel calm when I’m around loved ones and good people. I forgot about my worries, and am present. I was wondering if it feels like that with depression.
“I am still going to be here” Thank you for saying this D’Angelo. Sometimes the hope of feeling better one day doesn’t feel real or like it’s speaking to me. It sounds like fear, or even denial. But just continuing to… be… to exist… there’s something real and palpable and authentic about that.
D'Angelo, thank you so much for making this video. you are a beautiful human being and you have already made a very positive impact on this world. i relate to you deeply, i am 23 and have dealt with depression from a young age. i lost a lot of important parts of my life due to how depressed i was, and have gone through a lot of pain because of the pain i was already in. it fucking sucks. it feels cruel. i'm at a point where i've learned to cope and to be kinder to myself. that's all we can do. i feel the same about the "it gets better" part, it feels disingenuous because it's not guaranteed. and there were points where i was struggling to keep going, and i would think that even if i do feel better in the future, i didn't care because the pain i was in at all those moments was excruciating and all i wanted was for it to stop. when you're struggling so much, the future feels like an inconceivable abstract, a mere platitude. "it did not get easier, i just got better at dealing with it" describes my experience to a tee. i relate deeply to the all bad with the occasional feeling of happiness that's still underscored with sadness. to see other people doing so effortlessly well when i could not even keep my head above the water at points of my life that were meant to be enjoyable (HS and college especially) broke me too. something that i've realized in the recent few years is that there is no such thing as Being Happy. happy is not a constant state. there isn't a combination of steps you can take to reach the magical "happy" state. life happens. it has its ups and its down. what i've learned in my time is that there are beautiful moments, and even when in deep pain, gratitude can still be experienced. something that has deeply helped me is Buddhist practice. i was raised in a different religion and i still am that religion, but learning how to truly practice mindfulness (not in the way that it's been marketed so much lately, but the true buddhist way) has helped me immensely. thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story. i know it's not easy at all, and i commend you for that. i felt very heard, seen, and understood by your words. it helped me feel less alone in my battle. sending love
Especially one with success, when all you see is them decorating their new houses and going on splurge, and becoming less and less relatable. At the same time I wish I knew how it feels to be unhappy but financially “sorted”.
As someone who suffers from chronic depression and suicidality, I really appreciate you talking so openly and honestly about your pain. It goes a long way in making me (and I am sure countless others) feel seen, valid, and less alone. Thank you ♡
This is the first video of your channel that I’ve come across and I think it’s helped me. “I’m gonna do all these things and none of them are gonna fix me because I was never broken.” I’m only 19 but I too have struggled with some bad anxiety and depression for the past 10 years of my life and it’s one of those things that makes me feel as though I’m inferior to those around me who don’t struggle with these problems or those who are less “broken” than I am. All of this attempted “fixing” of my mental health has only landed me exactly where I still am today. I’ve been so frustrated by it but I think it’s helpful to stop thinking of those things as my flaws when it’s something that’s never been my fault. It’s not something that I wish to have had to deal with but never should I be treating it like a flaw of mine. So thank you… i think you helped remind me of this.
Honestly, it's such a very powerful statement that so many need to hear nowadays. Everyone keeps trying to fix themselves or add things to themselves that they never needed in the first place
Just turned 23 recently and my chronic depression and anxiety have been coming back with a *vengeance* for the past couple months; I needed this. It's so easy to feel alone in this state, but seeing how many people have been in the same boat for years just like me is comforting in a way.
Hey just wanted to say that I'm currently 23 turning 24 soon and I feel the exact same way. Since graduating college the depression has come back strong and even though from the outside it looks like I have everything together and it's all going great, even though I feel like I should be happy about where I am in life, it really feels lonely sometimes like there is something wrong with me for being sad. Long story short I wanted to say that truly none of us experience things alone and there's always someone out there going through the same. Hope you and everyone reading this that we all get better together. ♥
@@cryterionYT Thanks dude, I feel the same way. It's definitely in part because I just graduated college too and it feels like I should have my life put together by now. Sounds silly to everyone else because of course I'm still so young, but it feels so dire. I should be happy that all my hard work led to getting my degree, but instead I'm feeling like a failure. Nobody tells you how rough it is to get out of school! 😮💨 It's really good to know that I'm only one of many who's struggling after hitting such a major milestone. It sucks to feel obligated to act like things are going to be okay. We're really not freaks for feeling this way :)
@@cryterionYTI comepleyely relate. I graduated college last year and my anxiety and depression have gone absolutely wild since then. It’s been extremely difficult to manage even though I’m still working and living so people think I’m fine. But it’s so lonely inside my head
23 is a notoriously difficult year. Not sure why so many of us experience a wave of despair at that age, but hey at least we’re not alone. At 25, I can officially say that I’ve recovered from my 23. I’m in a good stable place now, enjoying this lull and recharging for the next inevitable flare up lol
In the words of Kimya Dawson, "I got good at feeling bad, and that's why I'm still here." You're not alone in this feeling and I'm so proud that you're determined to stay here
D'Angelo, "you have a 100% success rate". I'm a mom and letting you know that you've learned this massive life lesson. Our job is to keep getting up and exploring why we are here - how to use our gifts and talents and if we can't quite see clearly to them to keep looking. You are doing the work of life by your living and finding this such deep perspective at 26. I was a little younger than you at 23 when I first saw it too. You are doing the work. You are already doing it. There is no room for worry of disappointment. Your purpose lies in this honesty here and that is all part of your life's work - you've got a 100% success rate at that. Proud to watch you. And big hugs.
One of the only things that got me through the beginning years of healing from my severely abusive marriage was the mantra "you were strong enough to survive the initial trauma, so you are damn sure strong enough to survive the aftermath." You've given me another mantra I can use in my really dark points. "I have a 100% success rate." Thank you. That is such a powerfully positive message for people who struggle with both suicidal ideation and identity issues.
All day. Every day. For over 30 years. Thank you for posting this perspective. Chronic depression isn’t something people don’t understand unless they have it. It is absolutely refreshing to hear someone say that it won’t get better but it will be okay. I don’t know you, but I love you and appreciate you, D’Angelo!
Thank you for your vulnerability. It reminds me that I’m not the only one. Logically I know I’m not but hearing someone else’s genuine experience and vulnerability is so fucking validating. ❤
“I have a 100% success rate. As far as waking up and getting through the day, I have a 100% success rate. No matter how difficult it was, or what I had to do to get to the end of it. I’ve gotten to the end of every single day thus far. And I realized…I can do that again tomorrow.” “Depression is not mine to beat. My only job is to not let it beat me. And I win. I win every single day that I wake up.” “I don’t have more value because I am doing more, and I’m not going to be worth less in the future if I do less.” These moments genuinely brought me to tears. I’m 31 and struggling as well.
I resonate with the perspective of “I can’t fix it, so I have to figure out the most healthy way to exist within it.” Between mental illness and neurodivergence, it’s been a huge struggle to accept those parts of myself. Thank you for still being here to see the ups and downs!
yea, thats pretty much why im starting therapy wednesday. im really scared but know its gonna help :) edit: first session went great! got along very well and the guy was very good at making me feel comfortable and helped move the conversation forward a lot. he was oversll just very friendly :] i may update this comment after next session too. also ty to all these sweet replies, everyone coming together just to say theyre proud of me had been a huge mood booster and makes me feel like ill be okay, thank you guys
I avoided this video cause I knew it would be very emotional and I have to consider if I'm in a place to watch something super emotional. I have now watched it and I'm really glad I did. It's so good to see people figuring things like this out at such a young age. It to me 10 more years to get to where you are. I'm proud of you. I'm proud of me. You saying that you have a 100% success rate at waking up and getting through the day is what really got me. That is so very accurate. Thank you.
Seeing D'Angelo shed tears made me sad, i just wanna give him a hug. Dear D'Angelo, your videos have brought joy to people more than you realize. Hope this helps in some tiny way. Hugggs to you.
I’m 23, struggle with my mental health, and I’m a teacher of hs students. It hurts so much when my students confide in me about their depression, and all I can tell them is that this feeling won’t last forever or that it’s okay to sit in the depression. I know this doesn’t make them feel better, it doesn’t make me feel better to tell them this…and yet, there’s nothing else I can tell them. But as soon as you said “100% success rate”, I felt like it was exactly what we need to hear. “I am able to do something” is sometimes the feeling we need in order to continue taking a step forward. Thank you for making this video. Thank you for being here. It’s pretty dang awesome to be here with you.
congrats for making it to 23. I'm 15 and been on anti depressants since 12. It is really bad rn and well i'm without friends. THE POINT BEING i am OK with where i am. I am proud of me and anyone whos made it. seeing this video and these comments made me feel so so seen. You don't need to be able to give your students life changing advice , sometimes just listening and making them feel seen and heard is enough. You are a great teacher. keep it up
fully agree with the other comment: all you can do is be there for them and listen. also keep in mind the circumstances they're in. they probably don't have anyone willing to listen to them genuinely or that validates their feelings so it can be genuinely mind blowing for a teenager to hear "sometimes I feel the same way too" or "it's okay to feel that way and it's okay to express it." there are people around me that I wish had heard this in their lives because they've grown into adults that don't care about my feelings at all or don't think it's their responsibility because they're not a therapist. obviously I know that's not true but that means they also think I'm not here for them because I'm not obligated to be and it's absolutely heartbreaking
27-year-old teacher of HS students here! I've been struggling with depression for as long as I could remember, especially as a high schooler myself. For me, there were a lot of environmental factors and stressors that contributed to my poor mental health, which got better with age as I got more autonomy. Also, my brain has matured and is more "cooked" than it was 10+ years ago. I still have incredibly low days, but overall, it does get more "better" than it gets worse. That's what I tell my students. Life is full of so many little joys and reasons to live.
Having battled depression and anxiety for most of a life that's already been longer than I'll admit here, this has been the most inspiring thing I've listened to. You've given me some extra tools I didn't know were there. I can't thank you enough. ❤
I am sobbing. Everyone always tells me it’s going to get better, and I always feel like that answer is very dismissive, and it just makes me feel worse. Hearing you share your story made me feel so much less alone. Thank you for your vulnerability Your mindset brings one quote to my mind „One must imagine Sisyphus happy”
Hey D'Angelo... you're describing a process of self acceptance. This is the part that slowly gets easier as you get older and the part that makes all the other stuff - all the stuff that doesn't get better - better. Getting older just... helps. You know yourself better, you get better at living, at knowing what you need, at seeing your needs and responding to them, at being kind to yourself. It's not that life gets easier... but you get better at caring for yourself in the life you have, and you will. I know 100% that you will even without trying, just naturally by living your life the way it seems best to you, because you are so smart and reflective and you've come so far already. My 20s were really rough. My 30s have been way better. And it's not linear. But living is so worth it. You don't need more advice from a random internet stranger - in this video you're trusting yourself and your own voice and that's the part that you will keep coming back to. You will remember how to do this over and over again. Look for your heart and listen to it. That's all you need to do.
This made me think back to my younger self and how well she dealt with such hard feelings. I am so proud of her. I am happy to still be here today, even if it’s not easier.
Hi! Longtime listener, first time commenter. I found this to be so profound, and incredibly important to share. You put into words what I’ve been experiencing all my life & shared a perspective many of us need to hear. Thank you so much. I’m so glad we are here.
My friend- I think you found your purpose. Thank you for being brave enough to be this vulnerable on such a public platform. I can’t tell you how much this video resonated with me and I’m sure millions of others. Like you said, you may not be able to see what other people see in you from their perspective, but we see it. Except that we see your purpose even if you don’t. Thank you.
1:22 “…and if this doesn’t go, I will.” hit me hard especially since I’ve had a hard time lately. But I try to see things positively and hoping for the best every day and I sincerely hope you can too.💛
D’Angelo, As I say this please know I am crying with you and you are the success rate. You are so needed, loved, and your value is endless. The relatability of this feels like you are speaking for me, as me, literally word for word. As well as at a timing that seems like it is so much unbelievably in sync with myself at this very time, at this very moment. It almost feels unreal. It feels unreal. What an absolute validation and breath of air I needed. Thank you so much for uploading this. Now, in this moment. You are amazing and I could never explain to you how badly I needed this. I don’t want to make this all about me but I needed this in a way I cannot describe. I cannot thank you enough or ever tell you how amazing you are. Thank you for doing this D’Angelo. You are here for all that’s good in the world. Right now, it feels like you were here to help me. I am random and no one. You’ll never know I said any of this. I just need to know I did write this all to you. But, I am so proud of you. I just wanted to add that your words are going directly to my heart as I am trying so hard with the same struggles you are speaking of. You are such an amazing person and so strong. Genuinely, eternally, Thank you. All my love and support is sent your way. CONTINUE TO SUCCEED AS YOU TRULY ARE, ALWAYS♥️
I’m just gonna piggyback off your comment because I could not have said this any better myself. I’m so proud of D’Angelo and of YOU, and of myself, and that feels great to say❤
@@247webgirl I can’t believe you said this to me. Thank you so much, sincerely thank you. I can promise you I am very proud of D’Angelo, YOU, and am trying very hard to be able to say the same about myself. I am just so thankful for you saying this. I am sending all the love your way. Please never stop telling yourself that you are proud of you! ♥️♥️♥️
Through all my years of depression, the only quote that ever gave me hope was "I'm not gonna say its gonna get better, but I can say it'll be worth it"
I did not expect to cry watching a D’Angelo video this Saturday morning but here I am!! I am 24 and also have been unfortunately cursed with depression and anxiety since childhood. So weird to go from “yep I only have a couple more years” to “omg I get to live my whole life” and just having to accept that. I think it’s important to understand that although we will probably feel the dread of existence for the rest of our lives, there are many beautiful and wonderful things to experience - yummy things to eat, funny memes to laugh at, cats to pet, places to go. These things make existence worthwhile, I think. There is so much to live for and yes we have a 100% success rate despite how much is weighing us down. Thank you for being open and sharing this :’)
I'm sure Ill get buried in the comments, but man this video hits me hard enough that I need to respond on the off chance you'll read it. College is a living nightmare, the past two years especially have given me a run for my money to say the least. Diagnosed when I was very young, I empathize with most of what you're saying here... I honestly might ask my therapist to watch it to understand my mindset a little bit better. This is an awful awful disease that has consumed nearly every aspect of my life, as sucky as it is, I find reassurance in knowing I'm not alone. I always joke that I'm staying alive out of spite, but some days that truly is all that keeps me going. Thank you for sharing this. As someone who struggles to open up even in therapy, I know how scary it is to share experiences about mental health. Every day is a different kind of struggle. You're one of my go-to youtubers when I need to wind down after class, hearing this story hit me like a freight train. 100% success rate isn't a bad mindset, I might have to borrow it. Thank you, you made a difference for at least one person :)
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"I don't want to be just an awful story for my mom." That HURT.
It did. Imagine the pain of the Moms who have had to live that pain. I know one. It destroyed a big hunk of her.
Some moms think its an awful story since day one.
He just said it in my watch and it crushed me. I love D’Angelo a lot. I just learned of him 3 weeks ago and this is my first time seeing him like this.
I hope he finds strength, peace and most of all happiness.
It's the only reason I;m alive
@@bazzfromthebackground3696 loool
12:27 "Depression is not mine to beat, my only job is to not let it beat me." 👏💜💯
That’s some of the realest stuff I’ve heard.
💜
So goddamn real
Happiness is within yourself and for yourself. Some may seek happiness from others but really only you know what you like and what can make you smile.
I used to be depressed for many years, but after contemplating for a very long time. I realized I am the only one that rules over my own emotions.
@@ithamarlowe6158 that's great for you but it sounds like you're minimizing other people's reasons for being depressed
34 and I mainly exist for my birds, my art and pure spite.
Lol x ❤I'm only alive out of spite too xx
Keep going, j love birds 🐦, stay strong x
I felt that !!!!
What kind of art do you make?
Spite is a hope more powerful than hope sometimes and I love that for us
I also keep going for my birds 🥰
I heard a stand up comedian once say, "You can't beat depression, but you can outlive it." That has always stuck with me.
I like this 😊
Credit to Jim Jefferies
"I didn't get less sad, I just got older." I relate to that so much. Beautifully said.
so wise
Very relatable words.
On paper it sounds so depressing but in d’angelo’s context (an my own experience), it’s unequivocally uplifting
“I am not more valuable because I am doing more.” I fucking needed that today. Thank you.
For real
We all need to remind ourselves of this bc society is always pushing the opposite
Yeah I decided a long time ago that I don't need to be busy all the time or prove my worth with my time. I am allowed to just sit and relax and not feel guilty.
@@cinnamonsparrowdesigns what I’m working towards…. That anxiety that comes with not doing anything … sucks 😢
Repent and have faith in Jesus.
I see depression the same way I see my chronic illnesses. Sometimes its in remission, sometimes it flares. The most important thing is that no one extreme will last forever 💜
Oof yes this! & when they both flair up at once…scary thoughts
This
Thank you so much for this comparison and reminder. I never thought about depression that way before. I'm currently going through a flare up and I really did need to be reminded that it won't last forever.
Samesies! I just try to tell myself that I've seen the light at the end of the tunnel before and I can get there again.
ooh i feel this way about my OCD! it flares up but it cools down and it's just gonna be like that for life but I'm gonna get better at recognizing and coping with it with time
This is my first ever TH-cam comment. I've never engaged with TH-cam ever. Never liked videos, rarely subscribed, and definitely never commented. I had to "create a channel" just to do this. But I felt the overwhelming need to because of how this video absolutely wrecked me (in the best way possible?) I'm almost 23 and I have experienced so many similar things when it comes to my depression. I remember being 9 years old and terrified of the future because I couldn't understand how I could keep going with so much pain. But I did keep going. Last May I was in the hospital for a SA (edit: trying to unalive myself). But I'm still here. Which means I have a 100% success rate. Even after being at the lowest point of my life. Hearing everything I've felt before in my life so eloquently said made me sob and it was exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for this video. It means so much to me and so many people. ❤
agh, hate how much i relate to both u and d’angelo (in the way that i wish no one the same experiences i have i mean). im so sorry u were put through something so disgusting and EXTREMELY traumatizing so recently, yet i am SO so relieved to see u still being so hopeful and believing in urself despite such recent trauma. im so glad ur ok!! please dont force urself tho, its ok to not be ok, as cringe and cheesy as that is now to say lol
@@aquademoney Oh my god I'm so sorry for the misunderstanding. I didn't mean I was assaulted. I meant that I tried to off myself. I should have realized how that would come across. It was still very traumatic, and I really appreciate your kind words, but I definitely should have worded that differently
@@Saprina289 OMG IM SO SORRY LMAO😭😭 i mean i still relate to that too and im still proud of u so the only thing that doesnt apply is the “disgusting” part so wtv it still goes basically lol. im glad ur still here btw
Chronic depression is so deeply misunderstood, this is a very honest and accurate view of the reality of those of us like yourself, with chronic depression.
the way he titled the video is really great, pulling in people who feel this way and making us feel understood. feeling alone in this is one of the worst parts and it feels like this video was made with that in mind, no parasocial but man do i appreciate that.
I wish we could have this kind of honesty in mental healthcare settings. Unpleasant idea, but I truly think a lot more people would still be here if they hadn’t been told “We have to beat you down and force you to lie about your experiences so we can call you cured” by people who were supposed to help.
i don't think i've ever even seen this perspective even though i've been around the world of psychiatry for sooo long. i related to it so much.
a lot of the depression support stuff feels aimed at people with ultimately temporary periods of depression. the more common thing to go through.
i've been depressed since i was at least 6 years old. i've only ever been depressed, that's all i know... so yeah i never related to the "it gets bettter" stuff either. but maybe that actually is okay. we don't need to be bitter over that. just do your best and keep trucking along.
Actually, there is a lot more to it; it's not just depression, and sometimes despair is a symptom of underlying issues which remain unaddressed for many people.
There are a whole lot of issues like IBS, Genetic conditions, familial abuse which need to be considered in understanding what existence is, because these diseases end up paving the wrong path for many, rendering their experience of life insipid and full of misery, sadly.
This video is so relatable for me as someone who was diagnosed with chronic depression and anxiety. I can't plan my next 10 years, but I know I can take it 1 day at a time. It's exhausting, but I'm still here.
“I have a 100% success rate.” Wow. Yes you do. That’s so powerful. Perspective is everything. Thank you for sharing this with us D’Angelo. Sending you love and support.
I think the hardest part of depression is the self-awareness. Most people go through life without thinking they have something that needs to be addressed or just avoid addressing it. It’s important to take care of yourself and not be afraid to ask for help. Identifying the symptoms is the first step to knowing when you need to protect your peace. To anyone reading this, I’m wishing you well on your journey.
Whew when he said that THE TEARS omg I can’t even see the screen while typing this
That absolutely floored me. 100% rate. We're f'in CRUSHING IT, guys. 🫶
@@JessicaLaShawn I teared up throughout this entire video. I don’t have the words to fully express how incredible this is and how powerful the perspective he articulated is. I’m so moved.
That really stuck out to me. I recently started college. I kept telling myself it’ll be a fresh start and I’ll actually be able to make friends and live an admirable life. But I still haven’t met anyone there and I constantly feel swamped and burnt out by the workload. I finally broke down last night, telling myself I was a failure. “Why is this so hard for me but seemingly not for anyone else?” But after hearing him say he has a 100% success rate, I realized that no matter how hard it’s gotten, I do too. I’m proud of myself and everyone else who is just able to get through each day, the good, the bad, and the terrible. I am sending love and support to anyone reading this
The comment about having a 100% success rate on getting through your toughest days is so powerful. We really need to give ourselves the credit we deserve in order to give ourselves the confidence we need to keep marching.
Ad an addict I'm struggling with this comment
Repent and have faith in Jesus.
Love this comment 💕💕
@@IloveJesus777j77 Jesus could fix every problem. Fuck him
@@IloveJesus777j77u first bby
I've been doom scrolling and chronically online for the last two years almost constantly to drown out the noise of my brain and to distract me from the sadness I feel. This was the first thing in months to make me stop and actually listen because it is word for word what I've been feeling, and you look at it in a way that I never considered. Incredibly profound. Thank you
"You have a 100% success rate." Thats a part of the mantra now.
It's such a perfect self affirmation!
This was actually one of the most helpful things for me to hear right now ❤
^ same! I'm really really happy I came across this video
That got me hard.
To me, depression is like grief. You can’t “get over” grief, you just make room for it. Some days you almost forget its even there, and others its the only thing you can think about. Thank you for showing us this vulnerability, and know that you speaking about this makes people feel less alone. Sending everyone who’s reading this love. Keep that 100% success rate up y’all!
this is so beautifully worded, thank you for this. 🖤
I love the way you explained that, makes sense. Seems like I just learned to live with it and function. Nice to know I’m not alone.
Agreed. The way I explain grief is that it doesn't get better, but you get better at managing it. ❤
thank you for this beautiful perspective ❤
I read something somewhere that said the grief doesn't get smaller the room around it grows, and yeah I agree that's exactly what it feels like with depression too. *It* doesn't change *I* do
Literally cried watching this. I’m 25. I’m in the same boat as you D’Angelo. Thank you for being open & vulnerable. Thank you for everything that you do.
I'm 25 as well. I feel lighter for the other comment that I made. People expect so much but why can't they just give me time. In my case, give one of the chores to my lazy ass of a sibling. I will be thinking on your comment!
Absolutely same, this felt like a narration of my life, and coming to the comments to see how many of us all relate to this made me sob even more. This is such a collective experience, yet it feels so isolating when we're in the middle of it.
same and same
33. Same. Felt every word of his like it was my own.
@@solillioquy😭nod nod nod *sniff*
Jesus CHRIST, I’ve been feeling this for over a decade and I’m only 25. You spoke directly to my very core. Only difference is, I’m still struggling with accepting it. My life is so mundane and shitty, despite me trying to achieve my goals. I truly have no idea why I’m still here, with everything going wrong in my life. I kept having to pause the video because your words kept stabbing me like a knife. Especially the ‘100%’ success rate thing. I’ve never thought about it like that. That made me cry. I’m still fucking WINNING. I’m never gonna forget that. Never. You’ve no idea how much this video helped me, some random ass stranger. Life feels like a black hole, but this video was a very tiny, very faint, very fleeting ray of light. I’m gonna come back every now and then and rewatch this, because I also know I’ll never get better. Thank you for this. Genuinely.
Not to get all parasocial here, but you're touching my heart. Not a therapist, but I am a Mom, and just want to wrap you in a massive virtual hug right now. Such a special person. It really is a huge problem when you want to be happy but know you have misguided chemicals in your brain that won't let that happen. Me too. I've learned to adjust what my perception of "happy" is, and that's helped me so far. I've made it to 54 years old now. Yes, we win!
Big virtual Mom hugs to everyone else who needs them too.
i’m neither a therapist nor a mom but @catsjamify your comment perfectly articulates what i wanted to say. ❤
🙌🏼❤️🙌🏼❤️🙌🏼❤️🙌🏼
I love this
i'm so proud of you!
"I don't owe the world happiness" was so healing for my inner people-pleasing teen you've no idea
It’s so simply true!
This is so relatable I love this comment
I’ve never had someone else put exactly how I have felt so eloquently into words. This was honestly more helpful than a lot of therapy sessions
I mean bro is SPOT ON , I feel so seen !! So HEARD !!!🤌🏽🤌🏽
Do most of us question the purpose of our day-to-day existence over and over again? Just wondering, many of you have experienced this?
@@Seeker7257 it's something that weighs on me more now that I'm 21. Im not as financially stable as the average 25-30 year old, but I think about what my life will be in the future if I only live to work. I'm just starting to accept that I'll have to do annoying hard work if I want the money to truly enjoy my life. With games, art and my cat(s).
I'm actually probably bringing this up in my next therapy session. I'm 37 and still fighting to "feel happy," maybe dude is just way ahead of me... But I will definitely discuss with my therapist first because I tend to jump at answers. "YES THIS WILL FIX IT!!!" -style. But yeah... This is very VERY much what I'm going through. And even with kind, open and supportive friends? The most we get into is "I'm depressed." "Me too." "I'm in therapy." "Yeah, I'm taking medication." That feels so, so open and daring and brave. This? This is effing heroic.
yeah. this is my second time watching today and i've sobbed both times at how real and raw and relevant to me it is
This genuinely made me cry. This is so true. This is so real.
I'm 70 this year, and have been draggin' this thing around since... like FOREVER? Finally got some attention and some therapy in 1968, when I was 14. Got some meds later, got different ones. Got different "diagnoses", to label whatever. You end up knowing you just get through it. "Live through this". I think you're swell. Not letting Mom down was always a big reason. Now I just have other reasons. A guy, some cats. I'm amazed to be this old, feel like it can't be true. My only big fear is dementia. Other than that, I can hang in here until whenever. It gets better, it gets worse, it gets boring, it gets terrifying. It means nothing, or does it just mean you tried your best. I approve and share, so far, your 100% success rate. Many people think you're swell. Hang in there!!
This stranger is also happy you’re still here!
So glad for your 100% success rate too ❤️
this is honestly so inspiring, thank you ❤
Beautifully put, thank you 💜
Hello fellow stranger! Dementia is a very real fear for those of us with a history of depression. I took care of my grandma who had Alzheimer's. Some people with dementia like having things that remind them of the day (TV shows, calendars, alarms) while there were people like my grandma who got upset if the day didn't match the "day in her head". As with depression, there are various ways to deal with it based on medical advice and our own experiences. The most important thing is to surround yourself with people who understand you! Cats and dogs help a lot as well. My pets were never trained to be service animals but they could pick up on my depressed states. Let's keep living through this!
“depression is not mine to beat, my only job is to not let it beat me” is something i didn’t know i needed to hear. thank you for this
Me too, since a powerful and necessary message!🙌🏼🫶🏼
Right!? Literally chills
Damn 😅
“I have a 100% success rate” really hit me as someone else who suffers with bad stints of depression and always has looked for that ‘fix’ to it. Thank you for that.
No matter what happens tomorrow, that person who feels like they can't get up is still going to be here. And that makes them a fucking legend. A fucking legend. Every day they choose to stay and face the world, they prove their strength. Don't disappoint yourself--you've already made it this far. Legend.
You’re a legend, Emily, go to sleep and wake up in the morning, knowing that 💕
"If you're still alive you're not struggling with depression, depression is struggling with you"
Sometimes there doesn’t need a “fix” necessarily. there is just perspective, because instead of beating yourself up, it’s all about perspective. like he said “i have a 100 percent success rate” which gives you perspective that you’ve made it through your hardest days, which you should be proud of yourself for! additionally, especially with therapy, it is finding a way to more healthily manage depression. finding ways that make it easier to go about your day to day activities without letting it dominate you, and learn healthier coping skills that makes it easier to exist and that comes in baby steps, because change doesn’t happen in leaps.
Thank you for being so vulnerable for us. This video was something I needed to see today
I don’t think anyone ever really “beats” depression; we just sort of figure out how to move through the world with the burden. Some days it feels lighter, some days it’s way too heavy. But we always carry it.
Sending you so much love, D’Angelo ❤️🩹
The best way to make depression easier is to socialize and be more present in your community. Make friends, talk to the cashier, go get food in person instead of through doordash. Go to community events in your neighborhood. You can do this even if you’re a shy, introverted or socially anxious person. Practice makes perfect. It might be hard at first but the more you socialize, the better you are at it and the easier it gets. Even something as simple as saying hi to people on the street and smiling, maybe even giving them a compliment will make your day a little better.
I'm gonna add a caveat here and say I agree with you in terms of, like, chronic depression - MOST forms of depression, really. But I will also say that SOMETIMES, depression can in itself be a symptom of something else, and sometimes it's GENUINELY just your brain chemistry out of wack. I was diagnosed with depression in my mid-twenties and started on antidepressants, and within one month I could GENUINELY FEEL how my brain chemistry was slowly evening out. I stayed on antidepressants for just THREE MONTHS and then I stopped (alongside my doctor ofc), and it was just. Gone. Poof, like it never was there.
Now, there was a whole host of other things that remained - I later got an ADHD diagnosis, I'm battling chronic fatigue, there's a bunch of stuff, so like. Am I doing GREAT? Nah. But that very specific way my mind operated for the three years prior to me starting antidepressants was gone, and it has not returned.
So you're absolutely right, some days are harder and some are lighter. Most of the time, it's not about being 'fixed', but learning to live with the way your brain and body is. But sometimes, very rarely, your brain chemistry just needs to be shook up enough that it can settle itself again.
My point of this story isn't to make light of depression or, like, humble-brag. My point is that I hope you, whoever might read this comment, seek help to the best of your ability, in the ways you can. Because the chance that your dark thoughts has an easy solution is small, but it EXISTS. And even if the easy solution doesn't work for you, it still means you've taken a big step towards figuring it out a little better, and I'm proud of you.
We have a 100% success rate, guys. Let's keep that streak going. ❤
That's what I've realized too
Serotonin is produced in the gut.
Taking probiotics,reducing gluten intake and increasing the consumption of raw fruits and vegetables has been working for me, people have to see what works for them. Also halt ruminating thoughts, mediation does help!
Some ppl do. Some ppl genuinely cure their depression, even those that have it for decades. I know this bc I know ppl who this was true for, i know a woman who lived with depression for DECADES but when she was about 30 she got ECT for her ptsd and it suprisingly cured her depression, its been 20 years since, and she hasnt even gone into remission. And it's important to remember that some ppl do cure their depression, bc "i will always be depressed" is often the thought that leads ppl to suicide. Im depressed and I know Id kms if I genuinely honest to god believed that. And Im glad that thats not the case for everyone, Im glad some ppl can accept that they might always be depressed. But I wish that we wouldnt spread the idea that thats the case for everyone, its incredibly harmful to depressed ppl who are already feeling suicidal due to the belief that theyll never get better.
At 76 years old, I can relate to your sentiments. I've pondered over your comment and have journeyed through a myriad of emotions. To be honest, I'm uncertain of how happiness truly feels; contentment is the emotion that predominates for me. I'm at a juncture in life where many might claim happiness due to a successful career, two adult children who are thriving, and two teenage grandchildren who are doing well. Am I happy? No, but I am content. My wish for you is enduring contentment.
my friend is only 20 and gave me this exact same sentiment. and it helped me so much
Nothing personal, but I'm almost 30, and to me, that's not enough to keep me here for another 46 years
@@439801RS, what each person needs and finds acceptable to continue in their life journey varies significantly. Clearly, being content is enough for me, and my point is just to offer my experience as only one alternative view. I hope that you find what you need to keep you active and involved for the next 46 years.
@@439801RSI don't present my perspective as universal. It has certainly been beneficial for me. My sole point is that not all of us seek happiness. I hope you have or will find whatever you need to navigate the next 40 years. Best wishes.
i love this so much 💗
Ugh. I hate "It gets better" or "You'll feel better tomorrow". Reassurance negates and invalidates legitimate feelings and puts pressure on the person to live up to those reassurances. If I could say anything to ppl who don't deal with depression, please don't reassure a depressed person. Listen, hug, and try to understand.
As a random person on the internet, I'm proud of you D'Angelo. Thanks for being you.
it's so dismissive.
I heard someone say that instead of saying 'it gets better' you should say 'see what happens'.
The most legitimately reassuring thing to say is “I’m here for you”. You’re not making assumptions about the other person’s life and how their mental health works, but you are saying they have someone to lean on when or if they need it.
But its the truth. I used to never think it would get better. It honestly does. Its up to you to hold on and create the when. It’s hard but thats what it is. It took so many years for me to understand.
For myself, I frame it as, tomorrow is a different day. Who knows how it can go. That's usually enough for me.
I have literally never felt so understood. Thank you so much. You don't understand how helpful it was.
I could write an essay explaining why, but I'll just keep it short and say that I really needed this video today. Thanks, D'Angelo, for being this open and honest.
seriously ❤
I'm sending you a big internet hug ❤ this stranger is so happy you're here and I believe the world is more beautiful because you're in it!
Exactly. Could write a lot more but I'm introspective and weepy. Just a really good video.
Big same
Same
i feel this way all the time, the struggle with realizing that there isn't a way to just be "better" and "fix" your depression, and sometimes you just have to be okay with never being fully okay.
I honestly felt this comment.
i adore the mindset of no longer obsessing over being “fixed” as a person. implying one can “be fixed” as an individual enforces the idea that there’s right and wrong ways to be alive. it’s important to realize you were never broken to begin with, you simply are a human being dealing with internal struggles others don’t have to face as consistently as you do
@@toastytoritillaYeah.
It's about being more accepting towards yourself.
Sometimes, just getting out of bed is a victory, and you should celebrate it instead of beating yourself over it.
Hard disagree. It takes a while but depression does eventually go away fully. Doesn't mean you're never sad but I went from constant crushing depression that lasted over a decade and a half to being pretty optimistic over the course of about 5 years. Life ain't that great to me honestly but I'm just happy to be alive and to have what I have.
My humble recommendation is quit using twitter and similar sites, divorce yourself from online and media discourse, avoid parasocial bonds, help people you know irl without expecting anything, and reject anything to do with self help gurus like it's the plague. That's just my opinion though. Hopefully things get better for ya soon friend
I lowkey needed to hear this
33 years old. Been on and off antidepressants since 11 or 12 years old. I hadn't planned to make it to 30. I literally have a whiteboard planner in my room with ONE DAY AT A TIME written on it. Thank you for speaking so honestly and frank.
Detox heavy metals depressing your nervous system
I hope you make it to 40 with more and more joy in your life.
@@bob48252 how do you do that
@bob48252
Literally, gtfo of here with your “depression is all the same” bullshit.
@@propogandalf Thank you ❤️. Going through it right now but feeling thankful it isn't breaking me like it would've years ago! I can't wait for 40!
Happened to stumbled across this video and am so grateful. I am 31 and have had moderate to severe depression since I was about 12. One of my grandparents and my dad both committed suicide so it runs in my family. I’ve been having the worst episode I’ve ever had the last few months and have been struggling with asking myself “why has it never gotten better? Is it always going to keep getting worse?” I found so much comfort and motivation in watching this video. Thank you 💛
made the realization the other day that i can be so happy and still have that deep sadness somewhere in my chest. some days are better than others.
This.
I feel like this is my norm now.
It can get easier, and therapy has helped me tremendously
I feel this
Very well said. It is a constant somewhere in the room, but I've been able to put it in my periphery instead of staring directly at it head on most days now. Like the person above, therapy has also been an immense help
It is so incredibly comforting to hear another human say this out loud..
i immediately burst out crying when you said "I have a 100% success rate", that hit way too hard
its a good reminder, especially in the tough days
sameee
Living in anything but wealth under capitalism is pretty miserable. Like meaningless endless depression. It’s a attitude that has to overcome all of the things we lack that our society won’t provide
that was the part that got me too, I never thought about it that way
@@EmmsRealityso true and most of us in the west have no connections here and therefore no purpose. Like my whole purpose before was trying to make life better ij my country. Now i live in canada and frankly don’t give a fuck about this place😅
same heree
"I have a 100% success rate".
I saved this to watch when I felt more stable, and I'm glad I did. Really appreciate you sharing your perspective, D'Angelo.
I just had my 27th birthday, and I'm filled with a vague sense of peace. I've been feeling so lost and confused, looking for 'the point'.
Closure is a myth. I'm glad I'm still here, and so proud of myself for coming this far. Keeping trying is SO hard, but I WILL keep trying.
Big love & a highfive to anyone who resonates xx
it's crazy hearing someone i look up to say so confidently and honestly the exact words i tell myself daily. "i've lived through every single day of my life, i'm winning", "i'm proud of myself for living in spite of never figuring it out", "i'll never experience happiness like i thought i would.. and i'm truly and genuinely happy with that". these are all realizations i JUST had this year. so hearing... idk, outside confirmation? that i'm not alone in feeling comfortable in my depression since it's not going away? wow. thank you d'angelo, truly.
And I just cried from the release of reading your comment. 🙏🏼💜
@@phuture2975 it's such a low bar though. 🤣😞 Like why is the bar in hell for us?
Facts …this video hit me like a brick. I’m covered in tears.
I feel safe in this comment section
@@sidneygordon2804because it just is. because we're humans with a condition. why are twins sometimes born conjoined, why do people get cancer, why are some people born rich, why are kids dying in wars. why do people die in plane crashes. because life is random and bad things happen to good people. but unless your going to unalive yourself, you carry on and win at life every day because you keep going despite things feeling awful. and I know it so hard to get over the 'why me' attitude because I still think that every day, it sucks, but other people have their shit, different shit to us, but their own shit. it's freeing in a way to realise that
Something about “I have a 100% success rate making it through the day” felt so good to hear.
Yup, im in college and sometimes i look around and see everyone making new friends but it just seems to not be that easy for me. Hopefully i can learn to come out of my comfort zone and connect with someone
I have this too! I’ve always had a really hard time to make new friends I always need time to kinda process. I’ve started my second year in uni now and I’ve only now started to connect to two people in my class.
you can do it !! i entered college thinking im gonna be as alone as i have been since forever but i somehow made what may be my friends for life. it really does get better
I’m in the exact same boat with college. I guess it’s good to know I’m not the only one (obviously I’m not the only one, but it’s different when someone else explicitly says exactly what’s on your mind).
me too ur not alone man
I am in the same boat, I hope you find a way to connect
you really have me crying in the middle of michaels rn
but for real "i have a 100% success rate" is gonna be my new motto (and so many other things you have said). thank you for making this video. sometimes these types of videos are the ones i actually find helpful and encouraging and optimistic in a realistic way
I'm 31 with chronic depression and my dad has a conversation with me yesterday about how I just need to "get over it", because I'm "pretty and intelligent and am well liked in my community" and "things aren't that bad".
I'm so tired of trying to explain it to people. It's a literal brain chemistry imbalance. I can't use positive thinking to fix it. I'm not simply having a bad day, or feeling sad, or being antisocial or grumpy or whatever. MY BRAIN IS LITERALLY FIGHTING ME AT ALL TIMES!!!
Wooow lol the gall to tell you to stop doing something that's happening to you? I wish people would stop seeing it that way. My dad also only believed in problems that could be solved with a belt, and I've never been happier than when I stopped talking to him and focused on my peace.
Thanks for saying this ❤ the past 5 years have been the worse for me, and to this day, my depression isn't letting up. It's not getting easier as I get older. It's getting worse. But it comes in waves. It's nice knowing we aren't alone.
"things aren't that bad" Yeah, you keep telling your brain that and it won't listen! It's like frustration squared.
I decided a while ago that I don't owe anyone a "reasonable" explanation about depression. If they've never felt it, good for them, but I don't have to make them understand. And I don't need them to understand.
I don't talk to my father about mental health, I know where I can and can't go into the topic with my mom and other than that I have my therapist and a close friend who knows what it's like.
Everybody else - not my problem. At this point my mantra is: if you don't understand depression, just be grateful you don't.
@@francookie9353 I think I struggle a lot with that...which adds to my anxiety of trying to explain to people why I am unhappy, why I've not reached out to them for months, why I am so damn depressed. I always feel terrible because I have a lot of good friends in my life, but trying to maintain those relationships WHILE having such chronic depression is so fucking hard because I do feel like I owe them a reason for why I am the way I am, why I disappear, etc. I don't want to lose them, but it's so so hard to foster relationships when you're like this...bc I don't want it to be anyone else's issue.
“Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.”
― Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Oh yeah, all the time. But happiness is not really an achievable state. Its a fleeting feeling that you can't sustain. These days I aim for stable and functioning with my depression. One of the hardest parts with chronic conditions is accepting that you will have to keep working at it and will never be "fixed".
I think I've learned in my 35 years that the key is to ride the waves. Enjoy the happiness when it comes and accept the sadness when it comes. We just have to be aware when the sadness is lasting for too long. If it's not naturally ebbing and flowing it might be a sign that you need a little more help, possibly from something in the pharmaceutical realm.
If you are willing, can you explain what depression feels like to you on the days when you’re stable?
@AdaezeNjoku-rx3dl I guess for me, it's being able to function (go to work, clean my house, keep up with bills, personal hygiene, etc.) despite the stresses of life. When I'm depressed, I can't keep up with the tasks I need to function well and stress triggers the thought "I need to die" rather than "I can deal with this problem after I de-stress."
Yeah, happiness is one of several emotions, and not a state of being. Something that took me way too long to realize
Right, yeah but often times when people say "I want to be happy" they don't mean a constant state of positive input, they mean they have the space to be happy, and enjoy it when happiness does come. "I want to be happy" means "i want it to be worth it, I want to be content" It means they want a more positive baseline. Saying "it's not an achievable state" is like responding to someone with a chronic illness saying they want to be healthy with "well you cant always be healthy, people get sick all the time"
You have changed so many lives just with this video, D’Angelo. Thank you for being raw and genuinely yourself.
"i'm going to do all the things and none of them are going to fix me because i was never broken".
damn D'Angelo. thank you for sharing.
“I was wrong in thinking I can’t do this indefinitely” shit man, that’s making me challenge my own mindset and I really appreciate that
00:15 Absolutely. I think some people don't really understand depression. When you have tried therapy, eating better, working out, socializing more, and medication; yet you still wake up feeling exhausted and happiness drains from your face after mere moments because the fleeting happiness gave way to brokenness again and when everyday feels like lifting weights just to stand up out of bed; it's like you just know it won't go away. I too thought it was things like success, or a relationship that would take that away. But no. It's something I've accepted will always be there, and I just try to put on a good face so those around me can maintain their own happiness. The acceptance though, has helped. It's helped me become numb enough to just keep going. Which is better than not going at all. A lot of people don't understand depression, because they don't understand how different our lives are from theirs. Honestly, I'm happy for them.
Meditation is the only thing that has made significant impact on my happiness. The ability to drop mental activity and sink into pure being is bliss. The human ego is suffering.
This. 🙏🏼
Every single word!
i love this comment so much i can't even explain. i wish you a smoother journey through life, really, and I get this 100%. sending u much much love
Damn man, that words my feelings well.
But I hope that we can both make it through. It’s never out of it, but through is an option.
Honestly I may be breathing and working harder out of spite for those that don’t understand me but there’s no reason that motive can’t lead to me helping people a lot. Just like you said, doing it for others.
I feel like that too.
I don't really know what to write. Not sure how this made me feel. Definitely made me tear up. I'm 31 and gonna be 32 this December. I'm very lost in life right now but you're right that I should be proud of myself for making it this far. I'm proud of you too. I've been in and out of therapy most of my life and the first time I tried medication it truly changed my life for the better but sadly I went too long without it and became immune. So now I guess I should accept what you have accepted. That I just need to learn to live like this.
This is the realest take on depression. Thank you for your eloquence but especially your persistence. Here’s to many more wins for all of us.
"It did not get easier, I just got better at dealing with it" Wow, that really hit me. Thank you for posting this, I truely needed to hear this right now. I've been struggling with depression for years and have been slowly but surely improving. Sometime I get moments where everything feels like it's crashing down and I'm bavk at rock bottom, but now I can pick myself back up and keep going.
Thank you for sharing this part of you, it has such a positive impact.
d’angelo i woke up like 45 min ago i wasn’t ready for this mental breakdown 😭 i know that other people feel the way i do but hearing it is so validating and heart wrenching at the same time
thank you for making the content that you do and continuing on through your own personal struggles ❤ your impact on this community and the individuals who consume your content is real and positive
It really is and now I’m sobbing. Hearing my own experience struggling with depression for my whole life from another person really makes me feel not as alone and not as crazy. ❤
youre never alone 😭❤
You are never alone ♥️ We have survived the strongest waves thus far and tomorrow we will keep sailing.
I cried when you cried. I'm 30 years old and I feel the same. And that's ok. Thanks for this video.
“I will never possess what I thought happiness was when I was younger.” Ugh, I relate to this SO much. For a long time, I sought things that seemed to make everyone else happy: college, boyfriend, marriage, mortgage, a kid, a decent 9-to-5 office job where I felt competent and respected, RELIGION, weight loss, friendships, etc. At the end of the day, NONE of those things made me feel better. I still joke that my brain is broken, but what I mean is that I know I’m always going to feel this way. Still, I keep persisting in spite of that (and out of spite sometimes).
Consensual hugs to you, D’Angelo, and anyone else who feels this way. It’s tough, and some days are easier than others…but it’s possible. 💛 💛 💛
Your brain isn’t broken for that, other people’s brains are broken. People desperately pursue those things because they feel terrible and they think they will bring relief, but it seems clear to me (as there are rarely truly happy people in any job or marriage, in my experience) that they just pretend it helps because they don’t want to FEEL broken. People do this with many things, including therapy, medicine (both psychiatric and physical), relationships, etc.; if there’s some promise that “x” will help you, but “x” fails to help you, it’s easier to lie to yourself than to think “wow am I just messed up here? why doesn’t this fix me?” I think this is probably why the divorce rate is so high, for example
Is this it? 😂😂 But real.
Yeah. I try to remind myself that these are things that peers have sought out just to find they were essentially unfulfilled or unhappy anyway. Or they weren’t content until they did live life in a way that their community or society in general don’t deem “successful”. Decided to simply do my best and attempt to only do what makes me feel satisfied, or on my way to feeling it. If a relationship doesn’t work out, it’s a blow, but I’ll live. One out of billions. If I lose a job, somewhere else is always hiring until I find something better. It ain’t all shit. Depressive episodes and anxiety don’t make it easy, but while we’re alive, we still have time to change our pursuits and lives, someway somehow.
I can only hope there are others out there able to do the same because gaining and internalizing that perspective isn’t easy.
I think it’s also important to note that you can recontextualize your depression. Looking at media constantly seeing images of “happiness” and that being the accepted status quo or baseline operating emotion, trains our brains to always see depression as this socially unacceptable state. In reality, there is nothing “bad” about depression except the way it makes you feel. Feeling bad is not objectively bad in anyway, to me it is just one of the many facets of my being that made, and continue to make me who I am. If anything, just being able to feel at all is special to me, so even in the most debilitating bouts of depression my internal dialogue still combats the notion that feeling like this is “bad”. I find this really helps me grapple with my depression. It does take a lot of effort and I know it will be an active effort for the rest of my life, but what else am I to do😭. Also, it helps me look back on times of complete despair with a kind of appreciation and admiration.
sending u many many hugs and much much love
This video’s timing is so surreal for me. Exactly a year ago, my boyfriend passed away from suicide due to depression.
D’Angelo, I do want to congratulate you for finding some peace in your search for answers/a “cure” for depression. I really found your discussion about your 100% success rate of making it through each day very inspiring, and it helped me reframe my perspective on my own depression and grief.
Thank you. ❤️
sending love to u and may ur bf rest in peace ❤
may he rest in peace, you both are in my thoughts today ❤
@@aliciaf7889 💐💐💐
My sincere condolences ❤
I really appreciate that you’ve made this video, as someone who has clinical anxiety and depression. It’s so rare to hear people talk about the reality of mental illnesses and not make it sound so black and white, happy or sad. It’s a complicated burden, but it’s not unmanageable or hopeless.
so glad i came across this video. to feel understood is so refreshing.
Speaking as a 50 year old that has had the privilege of riding the depression roller coaster, I agree. Some things don't heal, you just learn to carry them. There are times I'm in a depression and sometimes I'm in recession. Depression does go into recession. I think accepting that and reaching out for help during the down seasons is the way.
“Some things don’t heal, you just learn to carry them.” Preach, sister. I’m pretty young, 24, but I’ve gotten really good at putting up a mask. A little too good, maybe. One time my grandmother was making fun of me for only ever thinking about video games (I don’t remember how the conversation got there, but it was a sort of misunderstanding; I said something she thought was from a game when it wasn’t). I asked her, genuinely, what she thought was on my mind all the time, what I spent my time thinking about. She went “Video games?” Like it was obvious. “Sometimes, yeah, I think about video games. What steps I want to take next, what my strategies will be, sure. But sometimes I think about if my parents are disappointed in me. I think about how much of a failure I must seem to them, how I’m nothing more than dead weight in a world that wants me gone. How I have no real, actual skills, how everyone praises me for an intelligence I know I don’t have. How I can feel the edge of my brain slipping by the day, how problems that were once easy to solve are now too difficult to even begin. I think about how many stories I’d like to tell, how many pictures I’d like to draw or songs I’d like to write, but how I know my perfectionism will get in the way and I never start any of them. Sometimes I think about what everyone else around me is thinking, if they’re staring at me, judging me, whispering or texting about the weird fat guy in the corner. Sometimes I wonder whether or not everyone’s lives would be easier if I weren’t in them, if everyone would be better off if I disappeared. That’s what I think about, and that’s why I play video games; so for a while I don’t think about it.”
She then asked me if there was any way she could help, and I told her no one could, and that I knew she was upset, but that was why I never talked about it; because it makes everyone upset and I hate doing that to people.
Tl;dr: my grandma made fun of me for not having thoughts in my head so I told her all the thoughts in my head and why I never share them
The sentiment that if you wake up, do something, and go to sleep you've won is something I deeply needed to hear.
ikr, i sat and cried and just wanna say that i am proud of whoever is going through this and is living
It’s kind of uncanny how many humans feel this way. It’s almost like somethings… wrong with how we’re made to exist here.
That aside I appreciate you posting this because it helped me sort out some of my own thoughts about my chronic depression. I felt so bad after I finally saw some sort of success everyone told me was impossible, but I still wanted to leave. I didn’t let myself stop moving for so long because maybe the next achievement would make me feel better, bought a house, still wanted to leave. I lost it not long after cause of burnout and all this head weight but I think a part of me is always going to want to leave. I honestly don’t know if I’ll always win, but your analogy about having 100% success rate was a good one.
This has to be a scary thing to post. I’ve thought about sharing with my community but I’ve been too scared. Thank you for the honesty, and I’m glad you’re still here.
im glad you're still there
Right People, Wrong Place, August D the last, and the Bible.
Damn all RM's albums and suga D cuz depression. I know you don't like them, but hope you give mono a listen. St Paul suffered depression too. We love you.
What is happiness? Those moments that make you happy, aren't they happiness?
I wholeheartedly believe something is 100% wrong with how we're made to exist these days. I've been doing a lot of research on past societies and their ways of living, it was just so... Simple. They didn't have nearly the same amounts of stress and factors to worry about that we do today. Yes, their life was not perfect, but everyone was guaranteed a meal at the end of the day. Everyone participated in celebrations and events and recreational time. Everyone was guaranteed a shelter and clothes. Your worth was not measured by the amount of stuff you did that day or how productive you were. You just woke up, did what you needed to do, and went back home for dinner with your family or your community. Their celebrations and festivals would take multiple days. They weren't worried about "oh but I have to work so I can't enjoy myself too much". They just enjoyed themselves. I don't know. I just don't think capitalism combined with the constant temporary dopamine social media provides is good for you. Anyways, I'm sorry for yapping, I'm just very frustrated with modern day society and how anxious it makes me feel on a daily basis.
Y'all will think I'm kidding or being simplistic but I'm not.
The answer is capitalism.
@@IsuiGtz no I wholeheartedly agree. I basically said the same thing you said but much longer lol. I am fully convinced that the reason why a lot of humans feel this way is because of capitalism and social media.
I appreciate how it acknowledges the complexity of happiness; it’s not always a constant state we can easily achieve
I’m 20 now and in one of the worst periods in my life. Really needed to hear this. Now that I look back, all those times I wondered how I’d get through another day, I did.
Me too I’m also 20❤
Same, wish you all the best!❤
26 and I’ve been saying the same thing even before 20 :(
You’re not alone, I’m here with you at 19 and fighting an awful anxiety
this is a level of honesty you rarely see, online or in person. very well done.
I'm in the same situation and I'm in my 30s now. you get used to it, and more than that - you learn. you learn to cope, you learn to deal, you learn to question your head and your environment. I have my dog, I have friends, I have meds that help me. some of the best advice I ever got was 'sometimes it's triage'. meaning, at your worst, figure out the thing that will kill you first - thirst, hunger, lack of sleep. fix that thing. then move on to the next, and the next. the sun will rise, and we will try again.
Thanks for sharing ❤ Out of curiosity, do relationships help? Romantic. Family. Friendships.
@danielafurtado5095 they do, once you learn to look at them a little different. I learned to communicate clearly what I want and need, and ask others to do the same. A lot of miscommunication can be avoided by being clear and honest (in a kind way!) instead of expecting others to intuit what you may need, you know?
@@drunkhyena Totally. It’s not fair to expect anyone to read your mind … it’s nice when people “just get you”, that only happens when they’ve been around you enough times to pick up on your patterns.
I don’t have chronic depression. I’ve had really bad anxiety since 2018/19. The question for me isn’t “Will I ever be happy?”. It’s “Will I ever chill? And feel calm?”
And I find that I do feel calm when I’m around loved ones and good people. I forgot about my worries, and am present. I was wondering if it feels like that with depression.
“I am still going to be here”
Thank you for saying this D’Angelo. Sometimes the hope of feeling better one day doesn’t feel real or like it’s speaking to me. It sounds like fear, or even denial.
But just continuing to… be… to exist… there’s something real and palpable and authentic about that.
D'Angelo, thank you so much for making this video. you are a beautiful human being and you have already made a very positive impact on this world. i relate to you deeply, i am 23 and have dealt with depression from a young age. i lost a lot of important parts of my life due to how depressed i was, and have gone through a lot of pain because of the pain i was already in. it fucking sucks. it feels cruel. i'm at a point where i've learned to cope and to be kinder to myself. that's all we can do. i feel the same about the "it gets better" part, it feels disingenuous because it's not guaranteed. and there were points where i was struggling to keep going, and i would think that even if i do feel better in the future, i didn't care because the pain i was in at all those moments was excruciating and all i wanted was for it to stop. when you're struggling so much, the future feels like an inconceivable abstract, a mere platitude.
"it did not get easier, i just got better at dealing with it" describes my experience to a tee. i relate deeply to the all bad with the occasional feeling of happiness that's still underscored with sadness. to see other people doing so effortlessly well when i could not even keep my head above the water at points of my life that were meant to be enjoyable (HS and college especially) broke me too.
something that i've realized in the recent few years is that there is no such thing as Being Happy. happy is not a constant state. there isn't a combination of steps you can take to reach the magical "happy" state. life happens. it has its ups and its down. what i've learned in my time is that there are beautiful moments, and even when in deep pain, gratitude can still be experienced. something that has deeply helped me is Buddhist practice. i was raised in a different religion and i still am that religion, but learning how to truly practice mindfulness (not in the way that it's been marketed so much lately, but the true buddhist way) has helped me immensely.
thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story. i know it's not easy at all, and i commend you for that. i felt very heard, seen, and understood by your words. it helped me feel less alone in my battle. sending love
The last line!!! “None of it’s going to fix me because I was never broken!!” I felt that. This is just the way I was built.
This transparency is really admirable - hearing a big creator speak so candidly about depression and sadness is so valuable. ❤
Omg seriously it was like a glass of water in a desert
Especially one with success, when all you see is them decorating their new houses and going on splurge, and becoming less and less relatable. At the same time I wish I knew how it feels to be unhappy but financially “sorted”.
As someone who suffers from chronic depression and suicidality, I really appreciate you talking so openly and honestly about your pain. It goes a long way in making me (and I am sure countless others) feel seen, valid, and less alone. Thank you ♡
Agreed. You are not alone, my friend. Sending you lots of love. 💕
@@Kait_kit Thank you!! Sending love your way as well ❣❣
This is the first video of your channel that I’ve come across and I think it’s helped me. “I’m gonna do all these things and none of them are gonna fix me because I was never broken.” I’m only 19 but I too have struggled with some bad anxiety and depression for the past 10 years of my life and it’s one of those things that makes me feel as though I’m inferior to those around me who don’t struggle with these problems or those who are less “broken” than I am. All of this attempted “fixing” of my mental health has only landed me exactly where I still am today. I’ve been so frustrated by it but I think it’s helpful to stop thinking of those things as my flaws when it’s something that’s never been my fault. It’s not something that I wish to have had to deal with but never should I be treating it like a flaw of mine. So thank you… i think you helped remind me of this.
18:24 that sentence is such a important line cause everyone try to change and fix themselves but most of the time you were never broken ❤
This was an effortlessly flawless way to end this video. Got me in tears 😭 ❤
Honestly, it's such a very powerful statement that so many need to hear nowadays. Everyone keeps trying to fix themselves or add things to themselves that they never needed in the first place
Just turned 23 recently and my chronic depression and anxiety have been coming back with a *vengeance* for the past couple months; I needed this. It's so easy to feel alone in this state, but seeing how many people have been in the same boat for years just like me is comforting in a way.
Hey just wanted to say that I'm currently 23 turning 24 soon and I feel the exact same way. Since graduating college the depression has come back strong and even though from the outside it looks like I have everything together and it's all going great, even though I feel like I should be happy about where I am in life, it really feels lonely sometimes like there is something wrong with me for being sad.
Long story short I wanted to say that truly none of us experience things alone and there's always someone out there going through the same. Hope you and everyone reading this that we all get better together. ♥
@@cryterionYT Thanks dude, I feel the same way. It's definitely in part because I just graduated college too and it feels like I should have my life put together by now. Sounds silly to everyone else because of course I'm still so young, but it feels so dire. I should be happy that all my hard work led to getting my degree, but instead I'm feeling like a failure. Nobody tells you how rough it is to get out of school! 😮💨
It's really good to know that I'm only one of many who's struggling after hitting such a major milestone. It sucks to feel obligated to act like things are going to be okay. We're really not freaks for feeling this way :)
@@cryterionYTI comepleyely relate. I graduated college last year and my anxiety and depression have gone absolutely wild since then. It’s been extremely difficult to manage even though I’m still working and living so people think I’m fine. But it’s so lonely inside my head
23 is a notoriously difficult year. Not sure why so many of us experience a wave of despair at that age, but hey at least we’re not alone. At 25, I can officially say that I’ve recovered from my 23. I’m in a good stable place now, enjoying this lull and recharging for the next inevitable flare up lol
In the words of Kimya Dawson, "I got good at feeling bad, and that's why I'm still here." You're not alone in this feeling and I'm so proud that you're determined to stay here
Love Kimya ❤ she has the best insights
Not me crying in public while listening to this. D, I’m so proud of you.
D'Angelo, "you have a 100% success rate". I'm a mom and letting you know that you've learned this massive life lesson. Our job is to keep getting up and exploring why we are here - how to use our gifts and talents and if we can't quite see clearly to them to keep looking. You are doing the work of life by your living and finding this such deep perspective at 26. I was a little younger than you at 23 when I first saw it too. You are doing the work. You are already doing it. There is no room for worry of disappointment. Your purpose lies in this honesty here and that is all part of your life's work - you've got a 100% success rate at that. Proud to watch you. And big hugs.
One of the only things that got me through the beginning years of healing from my severely abusive marriage was the mantra "you were strong enough to survive the initial trauma, so you are damn sure strong enough to survive the aftermath." You've given me another mantra I can use in my really dark points. "I have a 100% success rate." Thank you. That is such a powerfully positive message for people who struggle with both suicidal ideation and identity issues.
All day. Every day. For over 30 years.
Thank you for posting this perspective. Chronic depression isn’t something people don’t understand unless they have it. It is absolutely refreshing to hear someone say that it won’t get better but it will be okay. I don’t know you, but I love you and appreciate you, D’Angelo!
Thank you for your vulnerability. It reminds me that I’m not the only one. Logically I know I’m not but hearing someone else’s genuine experience and vulnerability is so fucking validating. ❤
“I have a 100% success rate. As far as waking up and getting through the day, I have a 100% success rate. No matter how difficult it was, or what I had to do to get to the end of it. I’ve gotten to the end of every single day thus far. And I realized…I can do that again tomorrow.”
“Depression is not mine to beat. My only job is to not let it beat me. And I win. I win every single day that I wake up.”
“I don’t have more value because I am doing more, and I’m not going to be worth less in the future if I do less.”
These moments genuinely brought me to tears. I’m 31 and struggling as well.
38 and struggling every day.
34 and bawling in the living room.
41, and feeling the same.
I resonate with the perspective of “I can’t fix it, so I have to figure out the most healthy way to exist within it.” Between mental illness and neurodivergence, it’s been a huge struggle to accept those parts of myself. Thank you for still being here to see the ups and downs!
yea, thats pretty much why im starting therapy wednesday. im really scared but know its gonna help :)
edit: first session went great! got along very well and the guy was very good at making me feel comfortable and helped move the conversation forward a lot. he was oversll just very friendly :] i may update this comment after next session too. also ty to all these sweet replies, everyone coming together just to say theyre proud of me had been a huge mood booster and makes me feel like ill be okay, thank you guys
It’s gonna help truly. And if the therapist doesn’t click, find another one. Please. It works. It helps
I'm so proud of you!!
super proud of you! it's gonna help a lot!
I started about two months ago and I genuinely look forward to it every time. Just having someone really listen to you is helpful
@@Mokaluvable How do you know if they are good or not? I keep asking around, but I haven't got a clear answer
I avoided this video cause I knew it would be very emotional and I have to consider if I'm in a place to watch something super emotional. I have now watched it and I'm really glad I did.
It's so good to see people figuring things like this out at such a young age. It to me 10 more years to get to where you are.
I'm proud of you. I'm proud of me. You saying that you have a 100% success rate at waking up and getting through the day is what really got me. That is so very accurate. Thank you.
The way I cried through this like I was sitting in a therapy session 🥲 you're a beautiful soul. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Seeing D'Angelo shed tears made me sad, i just wanna give him a hug. Dear D'Angelo, your videos have brought joy to people more than you realize. Hope this helps in some tiny way. Hugggs to you.
I’m 23, struggle with my mental health, and I’m a teacher of hs students. It hurts so much when my students confide in me about their depression, and all I can tell them is that this feeling won’t last forever or that it’s okay to sit in the depression. I know this doesn’t make them feel better, it doesn’t make me feel better to tell them this…and yet, there’s nothing else I can tell them. But as soon as you said “100% success rate”, I felt like it was exactly what we need to hear. “I am able to do something” is sometimes the feeling we need in order to continue taking a step forward. Thank you for making this video. Thank you for being here. It’s pretty dang awesome to be here with you.
congrats for making it to 23. I'm 15 and been on anti depressants since 12. It is really bad rn and well i'm without friends. THE POINT BEING i am OK with where i am. I am proud of me and anyone whos made it. seeing this video and these comments made me feel so so seen. You don't need to be able to give your students life changing advice , sometimes just listening and making them feel seen and heard is enough. You are a great teacher. keep it up
fully agree with the other comment: all you can do is be there for them and listen. also keep in mind the circumstances they're in. they probably don't have anyone willing to listen to them genuinely or that validates their feelings so it can be genuinely mind blowing for a teenager to hear "sometimes I feel the same way too" or "it's okay to feel that way and it's okay to express it." there are people around me that I wish had heard this in their lives because they've grown into adults that don't care about my feelings at all or don't think it's their responsibility because they're not a therapist. obviously I know that's not true but that means they also think I'm not here for them because I'm not obligated to be and it's absolutely heartbreaking
@@datboilou glad u are so understanding proud of u
27-year-old teacher of HS students here! I've been struggling with depression for as long as I could remember, especially as a high schooler myself. For me, there were a lot of environmental factors and stressors that contributed to my poor mental health, which got better with age as I got more autonomy. Also, my brain has matured and is more "cooked" than it was 10+ years ago.
I still have incredibly low days, but overall, it does get more "better" than it gets worse. That's what I tell my students. Life is full of so many little joys and reasons to live.
It does last forever though, it's like herpes, rearing it's unwelcome head at the worst times
Having battled depression and anxiety for most of a life that's already been longer than I'll admit here, this has been the most inspiring thing I've listened to. You've given me some extra tools I didn't know were there. I can't thank you enough. ❤
I am sobbing. Everyone always tells me it’s going to get better, and I always feel like that answer is very dismissive, and it just makes me feel worse. Hearing you share your story made me feel so much less alone. Thank you for your vulnerability
Your mindset brings one quote to my mind „One must imagine Sisyphus happy”
Dude, I'm 40 and same. Your honesty is greatly appreciated. Thanks for this.
Hey D'Angelo... you're describing a process of self acceptance.
This is the part that slowly gets easier as you get older and the part that makes all the other stuff - all the stuff that doesn't get better - better. Getting older just... helps. You know yourself better, you get better at living, at knowing what you need, at seeing your needs and responding to them, at being kind to yourself.
It's not that life gets easier... but you get better at caring for yourself in the life you have, and you will. I know 100% that you will even without trying, just naturally by living your life the way it seems best to you, because you are so smart and reflective and you've come so far already.
My 20s were really rough. My 30s have been way better. And it's not linear. But living is so worth it.
You don't need more advice from a random internet stranger - in this video you're trusting yourself and your own voice and that's the part that you will keep coming back to. You will remember how to do this over and over again. Look for your heart and listen to it. That's all you need to do.
Beautiful comment ❤ I agree.
This made me think back to my younger self and how well she dealt with such hard feelings. I am so proud of her. I am happy to still be here today, even if it’s not easier.
I’ve learned happiness is momentary. I now just search for inner peace which I think is ultimately better.
Good point. Peace is different from happiness and you absolutely can find inner peace without happiness. Love your comment. ❤
That makes a lot of sense. I dont feel happy except in fleeting moments. And sometimes its hard for me to remember them.
Which makes depression momentary too. That was the piece I needed to figure out.
Hi! Longtime listener, first time commenter. I found this to be so profound, and incredibly important to share. You put into words what I’ve been experiencing all my life & shared a perspective many of us need to hear. Thank you so much. I’m so glad we are here.
My friend- I think you found your purpose. Thank you for being brave enough to be this vulnerable on such a public platform. I can’t tell you how much this video resonated with me and I’m sure millions of others. Like you said, you may not be able to see what other people see in you from their perspective, but we see it. Except that we see your purpose even if you don’t. Thank you.
me 2nd
1:22 “…and if this doesn’t go, I will.” hit me hard especially since I’ve had a hard time lately. But I try to see things positively and hoping for the best every day and I sincerely hope you can too.💛
this hit home for me as well
D’Angelo, As I say this please know I am crying with you and you are the success rate. You are so needed, loved, and your value is endless. The relatability of this feels like you are speaking for me, as me, literally word for word. As well as at a timing that seems like it is so much unbelievably in sync with myself at this very time, at this very moment. It almost feels unreal. It feels unreal. What an absolute validation and breath of air I needed. Thank you so much for uploading this. Now, in this moment. You are amazing and I could never explain to you how badly I needed this. I don’t want to make this all about me but I needed this in a way I cannot describe. I cannot thank you enough or ever tell you how amazing you are. Thank you for doing this D’Angelo. You are here for all that’s good in the world. Right now, it feels like you were here to help me. I am random and no one. You’ll never know I said any of this. I just need to know I did write this all to you. But, I am so proud of you. I just wanted to add that your words are going directly to my heart as I am trying so hard with the same struggles you are speaking of. You are such an amazing person and so strong. Genuinely, eternally, Thank you. All my love and support is sent your way. CONTINUE TO SUCCEED AS YOU TRULY ARE, ALWAYS♥️
I’m just gonna piggyback off your comment because I could not have said this any better myself. I’m so proud of D’Angelo and of YOU, and of myself, and that feels great to say❤
@@247webgirl I can’t believe you said this to me. Thank you so much, sincerely thank you. I can promise you I am very proud of D’Angelo, YOU, and am trying very hard to be able to say the same about myself. I am just so thankful for you saying this. I am sending all the love your way. Please never stop telling yourself that you are proud of you! ♥️♥️♥️
Through all my years of depression, the only quote that ever gave me hope was "I'm not gonna say its gonna get better, but I can say it'll be worth it"
Thank you for sharing this, there’s comfort in knowing other people feel similarly
I did not expect to cry watching a D’Angelo video this Saturday morning but here I am!! I am 24 and also have been unfortunately cursed with depression and anxiety since childhood. So weird to go from “yep I only have a couple more years” to “omg I get to live my whole life” and just having to accept that. I think it’s important to understand that although we will probably feel the dread of existence for the rest of our lives, there are many beautiful and wonderful things to experience - yummy things to eat, funny memes to laugh at, cats to pet, places to go. These things make existence worthwhile, I think. There is so much to live for and yes we have a 100% success rate despite how much is weighing us down. Thank you for being open and sharing this :’)
Repent and have faith in Jesus.
@@IloveJesus777j77 Thanks for the suggestion! I was actually leaning more towards having faith and love for myself but maybe I can squeeze that in.
"It didn't get better, I just got better at handling it."
This video is amazing. Thank you for this.
I'm sure Ill get buried in the comments, but man this video hits me hard enough that I need to respond on the off chance you'll read it. College is a living nightmare, the past two years especially have given me a run for my money to say the least. Diagnosed when I was very young, I empathize with most of what you're saying here... I honestly might ask my therapist to watch it to understand my mindset a little bit better. This is an awful awful disease that has consumed nearly every aspect of my life, as sucky as it is, I find reassurance in knowing I'm not alone. I always joke that I'm staying alive out of spite, but some days that truly is all that keeps me going. Thank you for sharing this. As someone who struggles to open up even in therapy, I know how scary it is to share experiences about mental health. Every day is a different kind of struggle. You're one of my go-to youtubers when I need to wind down after class, hearing this story hit me like a freight train. 100% success rate isn't a bad mindset, I might have to borrow it. Thank you, you made a difference for at least one person :)
This is the most accurate description of depression I’ve ever heard
"I'm going to do all the things and none of them are going to fix me cause I was never broken."
Your truth is beyond powerful. Thank you for sharing.