Whenever I'm feeling quite lost in my relationship, I always resort to your advises. They give me so much reassurance, and I find great comfort in the way you make sense of painfully difficult circumstances. Always gives me the drive to take a step in the right direction. Thank you, Brian!
We have to see each other as we are and how we can become. We also need to remember we are not perfect and will make mistakes. Be who you are but strive to be better. You have to be willing to work on the relationship. I tried to encourage my husband to spend time together doing a variety of things. It just never really happened!! My list of activities was long but not extravagant. You don't need to spend a ton of money to enjoy time together.
Some things I’d like to dive into a bit to get more understanding: 1. When you say “get to know the real him”, do you believe it’s a woman’s responsibility to always pull the “real him” out, or would you recommend that men also need to learn how to be more communicative with their authentic selves? Many women already try getting men to open up, but many men refuse to open up because they perceive any vulnerability as a sign of weakness. That’s not something a woman can fix unless she’s a therapist, and even a therapist can’t make a man open up if he doesn’t want to. His authenticity is his responsibility. 2. You give this example of your friend’s love interest ghosting him, but don’t give us a specific step to “keeping a man committed” (as if we can actually do that lol). Are you trying to say “don’t ghost a guy and he’ll be committed”? Please give clarity to this part. 3. Yes, we should all be our authentic selves. But to claim that this keeps a man committed? Unfortunately many women’s’ experiences show that once they start becoming more authentic, most men withdraw, have affairs, etc. they don’t want real relationships because men are socialized to think relationship is a weakness. 4. Doing something active? Again, I’m not sure you’re actually in touch with women’s’ perspectives here. Women are ALWAYS trying to accommodate to men. We usually do what they want to do, and when we bring up things we want to do, they usually act like that’s “too girly” for them. Activities should not be gendered, but sadly, they still are, and things that are considered “masculine” are seen as acceptable to everyone, but things that are considered “feminine” are still largely seen as exclusive to women and girls and are perceived as inferior to the things considered masculine. Telling women to simply accommodate more in this way is not only unequal, but doesn’t keep men committed. I’ve seen men get with amazing women but not commit and men get with women that don’t show a sign of uniqueness and worship the ground she walks on. Men commit because they want to. That’s it. Either they’ve got enough of their shit together to be ready for commitment or they don’t.
There is truly no formula to love. I prefer to be authentic and not worry about making him commit. If he commits great and if he doesnt ... great too as it saves me time of dealing with a man who plans to leave. I have found that if a man truly loves you, he will be the one trying to keep you, no matter how high your standards are.
@@luckycharm1212 lol I’m completely fine with my authentic self. But most men don’t want authentic women. They want women that please them until they’re bored and want someone else.
@@luckycharm1212 just because I’m asking questions and making observations doesn’t mean I have self esteem issues. People can ask questions, and should
If you are having these kinds of problems with men or you are one of those girls who says “women put in all the effort but all men are jerks, all men are…” , then you have some issues of your own in your past that makes you seek abusive relationships. You migh deny it but traumatised women always go for abusive men to repeat the same cycle of familiarity. You need to get therapy if you truly wish to be in a healthy relationship.
🤣 You’re the best, Geert-Brian. You’re psychologically spot-on AND you deliver your crystal-clear, super-helpful information with a humor that’s uniquely your own and simply fantastically hilarious. Thank you for your wonderful work. I’ve learned so much from what you teach, and my dating life is becoming increasingly healthy because of it. THANK YOU.
Would love French people to be able to listen to you too… we don’t have anyone with your unique spirit ! I have French connections that really need your advices and stories
You have a gift. I could watch your videos all day long and never get bored. Your content is solid with a good amount of humor, and that accent... yep. Big fan.
THUMBSUPTHUMBSUPTHUMBSUP!!!!! 4th time listening to this guy and I KNOW I need not listen to a single word before I THUMBSUP!!!!!!!!! LOVING HIM!!!!! (will create a playlist asap with him mostly on it!!!!). LOVE THIS GUY!!!!!!!
Each of these videos are making me more aware of myself and my mate. I am feeling like I'm less and less and LESS of anything he wants in his life. I am unable to apply any of the positive things you're speaking about. Even when he shares those 'fond memories' I feel like he is making fun of me more than he is sharing a passion for something we did. A passion for mE being the one he shared that moment with.. . I'm embarrassed AF!
These videos are calming my anxiety over not being with him and realizing I was putting him on a pedestal and he was withdrawing. I will know how to deal with him when he comes.
This actually happens to me often... I meet a man, he gets fascinated by how amazing I am, we start to date and boom after few weeks he realizes I am still a person with flaws and scars, and not some kind of goddess. And then he leaves saying I am not what he was looking for. I am really not trying to hide who I am, althought I do understand I do something wrong. Any ideas?
There is nothing wrong with you,, if someone cannot love ur real nature then he is not your man ,, Just be urself right person will reach you on right time & only thing is just keep some healthy boundaries btw you both , also give equal vaule nd space to Ur and his feelings that's all. Note-Sry for my English 😅 that is my second language still on learning phase.
@@Miniflower25 Thank you. I know I don't have to change myself, I am just looking for the errors in my approach, because this situation is common and I am really tired of that (I am 30). But maybe you are right and I just haven't met the right person. And don't worry about your English, I am not a native speaker either 🙂
@@Jooney91 It's them, not you. It can be frustrating when we keep constantly meeting people of a similar type but it's all about the right person and the right timing
@@Hari-bz1mh thank you for your kind words. Maybe I shouldn't worry that much if I have done everything right so I will meet him. Nobody is "finished product" anyways 😊
@@freshstrt3140 thank you for your opinion. That's actually why I asked in a first place. There may be a problem I don't see, or cannot tell if I still need to work on. The hardest thing I see in self-developement is to find a balance and not to be too hard on yourself. But I am lucky to meet people who teach me so I hope I will solve it and find my way. I am not desperate, but don't want to waste my time either, if there is something I can fix 🙂 thanks again for idea I can think of.
Loved this advice because I always second guess if I showed too much of myself, but why would I be with someone who doesn't make me comfortable to be myself or like who I am.
I found your channel a few days ago. I have a new boyfriend and am struggling a little with trust issues, etc. Your videos are very informative and entertaining! I'm a new subscriber.
1. Being irreplaceable should not be your primary goal. That would put him on a pedestal. 2. Try to see the real him: -Don't be delusional. -Think rationally. -Beware of the mind games. 3. Be special: -Don't blend in with other women he knows. -Be authentic, to see if he's genuinely interested or not. -Let there be differences between you two. Don't change for him. 4. Do more fun activities together than just restaurant dates. Allow him to see you in motion to notice your uniqueness.
Ty Brian. My master plan was to dye my hair red and put on my best linen dress and sing rather poorly I might add, " Make up your mind" by Florence and the Machine in the middle of the living room. 😆
This is the first time I've ever saw your video, and Hiet, I like your style, you have a cool way of explaining your examples in a way anyone can understand. I'm an instant subscriber😁❤️
" Feed him twice a day... if he makes a mess just tide up, bring him out for a walk, give him a biscuit as a reward ?! ".... I guess some people do like that to make their relationships work! But this would never really work!
I beginning to watch this kind of advice because of what I facing right now . Me and my best friend Im beginning to fall for him he doesn't know and suddenly he told me he meet the girl he like for all those flirting we do it's just me I'm fall but he told me I'm he's priority even he have like someone I'm crazy to choose to stay his side but now I watch this it's like a bomb to me it's really not okay this kind of feelings it's affecting my whole life it's so painful and I don't want to sleep so that It can't running my head
You are by far one of the best spoken ones I’ve seen here. Logical reasons, insight, wisdom. No fake bs abt “how 2 get a guy fASt”. Genuine tips. Thank you. Great tips for real men & love
What I find odd is I wanted to do more and for the most part he wanted to do less and less, just go through fast food lines and run errands or sit in front of the TV. However the most exciting and unexpected and romantic weekend we spent was the last time.we saw each other and after that he was "too busy" and put everyone else ahead of me during the holidays. I never understood that. We were together for 10 months and suddenly the communication abruptly pretty much stopped about 1.5 weeks before it and he had no idea when he would have the time to see me. I was trying to do inexpensive things together before that romantic weekend so we could make more memories. He would rather do those with his friends.
Why were you trying to do inexpensive things? And let the man do the trying/make the effort. It’s obvious he’s no longer interested and you need to move on. A woman should always keep a slight air of distance to her no matter how long you’ve been with a man. Never make the relationship the only thing you think about.
I was always half cut when I'd speak to him, always had my beer googles on,the first thing I ever said to him was" I love your name!"what did I get from him nothing!nat a thing!so I didn't like him(i actually hid from him the next time I saw him),,but I do now he's slightly amusing 🤣he knows I'm such a catch🥴🍻
one does not have to be famous to be desired for the wrong reasons. A lady with a nice rack or attractive hips can be invisible to a man who has a weakness for those features and no self-control. Some women who learn they have this power have to decide if they are satisfied with using their bodies to take advantage of men, or if they would rather be loved for the part of them that will last forever. If you are using your beauty to manipulate a man he can lose interest in you for anyone he finds more beautiful in some way....
It’s not about being perfect
it’s about being authentic 😎
“Who’s a good boy !” 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Ahahah, that’s actually quite accurate.
Right 😂😂😂😂
I though the first one is serious 😂 and I'm like in not gonna do that
🐾🤣
😂😂
Whenever I'm feeling quite lost in my relationship, I always resort to your advises. They give me so much reassurance, and I find great comfort in the way you make sense of painfully difficult circumstances. Always gives me the drive to take a step in the right direction. Thank you, Brian!
Couldn't agree more
Me too!!
Can relate, yes. Ty.
So true
Brian you put things into perspective like nobody else.
Very true
“He’s not like a dog… most of the time” 🤣
Yes, building memories is very important.
And fun.
And alive.
We are here in this world for living ourselves, perpetuate life and sustain life itself.
Beautiful message
OMG you just solved my problem. Answered the questions he won't. Huge epiphany huge! Thank you!
We have to see each other as we are and how we can become. We also need to remember we are not perfect and will make mistakes. Be who you are but strive to be better. You have to be willing to work on the relationship. I tried to encourage my husband to spend time together doing a variety of things. It just never really happened!! My list of activities was long but not extravagant. You don't need to spend a ton of money to enjoy time together.
Ah, that’s the problem. I wasn’t feeding him. 😂
🤣😂😂
I left the Leash at home 😂
I was just thinking, "Am I in a relationship with a Dog"? 🙄
😂😂😂 don’t feel bad I was feeding him but I didn’t walk him
@@Memegirl716 😂
That is great advice - doing activities that create memories, and not always sitting down talking
Some things I’d like to dive into a bit to get more understanding:
1. When you say “get to know the real him”, do you believe it’s a woman’s responsibility to always pull the “real him” out, or would you recommend that men also need to learn how to be more communicative with their authentic selves? Many women already try getting men to open up, but many men refuse to open up because they perceive any vulnerability as a sign of weakness. That’s not something a woman can fix unless she’s a therapist, and even a therapist can’t make a man open up if he doesn’t want to. His authenticity is his responsibility.
2. You give this example of your friend’s love interest ghosting him, but don’t give us a specific step to “keeping a man committed” (as if we can actually do that lol). Are you trying to say “don’t ghost a guy and he’ll be committed”? Please give clarity to this part.
3. Yes, we should all be our authentic selves. But to claim that this keeps a man committed? Unfortunately many women’s’ experiences show that once they start becoming more authentic, most men withdraw, have affairs, etc. they don’t want real relationships because men are socialized to think relationship is a weakness.
4. Doing something active? Again, I’m not sure you’re actually in touch with women’s’ perspectives here. Women are ALWAYS trying to accommodate to men. We usually do what they want to do, and when we bring up things we want to do, they usually act like that’s “too girly” for them. Activities should not be gendered, but sadly, they still are, and things that are considered “masculine” are seen as acceptable to everyone, but things that are considered “feminine” are still largely seen as exclusive to women and girls and are perceived as inferior to the things considered masculine. Telling women to simply accommodate more in this way is not only unequal, but doesn’t keep men committed.
I’ve seen men get with amazing women but not commit and men get with women that don’t show a sign of uniqueness and worship the ground she walks on.
Men commit because they want to. That’s it. Either they’ve got enough of their shit together to be ready for commitment or they don’t.
There is truly no formula to love. I prefer to be authentic and not worry about making him commit. If he commits great and if he doesnt ... great too as it saves me time of dealing with a man who plans to leave.
I have found that if a man truly loves you, he will be the one trying to keep you, no matter how high your standards are.
@@luckycharm1212 lol I’m completely fine with my authentic self. But most men don’t want authentic women. They want women that please them until they’re bored and want someone else.
Ur right. U said all the things everyone thinks but doesn't say.
@@luckycharm1212 just because I’m asking questions and making observations doesn’t mean I have self esteem issues. People can ask questions, and should
If you are having these kinds of problems with men or you are one of those girls who says “women put in all the effort but all men are jerks, all men are…” , then you have some issues of your own in your past that makes you seek abusive relationships. You migh deny it but traumatised women always go for abusive men to repeat the same cycle of familiarity. You need to get therapy if you truly wish to be in a healthy relationship.
Brian!😂 "reward him and give him a toy, who's a good boy"😂😂😂
🤣 You’re the best, Geert-Brian. You’re psychologically spot-on AND you deliver your crystal-clear, super-helpful information with a humor that’s uniquely your own and simply fantastically hilarious. Thank you for your wonderful work. I’ve learned so much from what you teach, and my dating life is becoming increasingly healthy because of it. THANK YOU.
You bring me back to reality. Knowing my guy and still caring about him, warts and all, and visa versa, has helped us BOTH relax.
Love your humor and positive energy, Amazing. I find myself laughing and smiling while also receiving what I feel is great advise. Cheers.
same here 😅
Your guidance is priceless for me, it’s like having the wisest older brother 24/7. I loved your book as well. Thank you for all you do 🙏🏼
Be confident in your vulnerability to be authentically you 😎😘
Very well said
Actions speak. Louder than words. X
Now I understand why he doesn't want to lose me. He told me he got attached when I opened up to him.
I get scared every time my boyfriend says “you are perfect “ deep down I know I’m not
He sees you as perfect for him 😊
I wish mine would say that to me. I always tell him that he is to me.
Perfectly imperfect perhaps.... wabi sabi I think it is
"Brian : Brilliant as always ❤️"
Would love French people to be able to listen to you too… we don’t have anyone with your unique spirit ! I have French connections that really need your advices and stories
You have a gift. I could watch your videos all day long and never get bored. Your content is solid with a good amount of humor, and that accent... yep. Big fan.
I love your comedian side!!
its so enjoyable to hear your playfulness Brian :) thank u for Being YOU!
THUMBSUPTHUMBSUPTHUMBSUP!!!!! 4th time listening to this guy and I KNOW I need not listen to a single word before I THUMBSUP!!!!!!!!! LOVING HIM!!!!! (will create a playlist asap with him mostly on it!!!!). LOVE THIS GUY!!!!!!!
Each of these videos are making me more aware of myself and my mate. I am feeling like I'm less and less and LESS of anything he wants in his life. I am unable to apply any of the positive things you're speaking about.
Even when he shares those 'fond memories' I feel like he is making fun of me more than he is sharing a passion for something we did. A passion for mE being the one he shared that moment with.. . I'm embarrassed AF!
This was a unique and wise list of points. Very useful and thought-provoking. Thank you!
These videos are calming my anxiety over not being with him and realizing I was putting him on a pedestal and he was withdrawing. I will know how to deal with him when he comes.
This is hands down one of the best dating videos I have watched. Thank you!
This actually happens to me often... I meet a man, he gets fascinated by how amazing I am, we start to date and boom after few weeks he realizes I am still a person with flaws and scars, and not some kind of goddess. And then he leaves saying I am not what he was looking for. I am really not trying to hide who I am, althought I do understand I do something wrong. Any ideas?
There is nothing wrong with you,, if someone cannot love ur real nature then he is not your man ,, Just be urself right person will reach you on right time & only thing is just keep some healthy boundaries btw you both , also give equal vaule nd space to Ur and his feelings that's all.
Note-Sry for my English 😅 that is my second language still on learning phase.
@@Miniflower25 Thank you. I know I don't have to change myself, I am just looking for the errors in my approach, because this situation is common and I am really tired of that (I am 30). But maybe you are right and I just haven't met the right person.
And don't worry about your English, I am not a native speaker either 🙂
@@Jooney91 It's them, not you. It can be frustrating when we keep constantly meeting people of a similar type but it's all about the right person and the right timing
@@Hari-bz1mh thank you for your kind words. Maybe I shouldn't worry that much if I have done everything right so I will meet him. Nobody is "finished product" anyways 😊
@@freshstrt3140 thank you for your opinion. That's actually why I asked in a first place. There may be a problem I don't see, or cannot tell if I still need to work on. The hardest thing I see in self-developement is to find a balance and not to be too hard on yourself. But I am lucky to meet people who teach me so I hope I will solve it and find my way. I am not desperate, but don't want to waste my time either, if there is something I can fix 🙂 thanks again for idea I can think of.
Haha. Celebrities never date their fans. Great point. 😁💥😁💥😁 Don’t put your boyfriend on a pedestal. Keep your life full.
You deserve Millions more Abos!!! Great Advices!
Thanks Brian! I really like listening to your videos, they're fun, entertaining and most of all educational!
Loved this advice because I always second guess if I showed too much of myself, but why would I be with someone who doesn't make me comfortable to be myself or like who I am.
I was so scared you weren’t gonna make any more new videos! I love your intro! I’m so glad to see your still making videos
I found your channel a few days ago. I have a new boyfriend and am struggling a little with trust issues, etc. Your videos are very informative and entertaining! I'm a new subscriber.
Thank you Brian for your valuable tips... from Egypt 🇪🇬 with love
Well said ..be authentic..
The introduction is brilliant 😂😂😂
So is the rest of the contents. Thank you very much.
You're a real blessing to so many girls out der..
I genuinely love him a lot.
I always go with ur advice to save my relationship..
@jennifer Santiago thankyou
I absolutely love your valuable sense of humor!
Who is a good boy award him with a toy or cookie🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Geert! Thank you it is sooooo true, you hit so many points that I needed to reminded of 🤗 Cheers 🇨🇦
😂😂😂 I love your humour
Please do more videos
You’re one of my favourite coaches
1. Being irreplaceable should not be your primary goal. That would put him on a pedestal.
2. Try to see the real him:
-Don't be delusional.
-Think rationally.
-Beware of the mind games.
3. Be special:
-Don't blend in with other women he knows.
-Be authentic, to see if he's genuinely interested or not.
-Let there be differences between you two. Don't change for him.
4. Do more fun activities together than just restaurant dates. Allow him to see you in motion to notice your uniqueness.
I think I love my dog more much simpler 😁thank u straight forward to the point amazing video
Thank you so much! So helpful! And I love your sense of humour 😀
you make me giggle! thank you ! :)
You really make me smile with this post.( what I mean by that is your subtle form of sarcasm at the beginning of the video. That made mi laugh)
Oh my I thought hearing that at the 1st part ot this video, hei's lost it! lol So Funny!
Thank you so much. This is one of your best videos.
TOTALLY AGREE! BRILLIANT ADVICE! 👍
Most guys are dogs lol but you are a BLESSING 😂🥰😆
🤣🤣
❤😂❤😂❤😂
I did not expect to laugh that long at your intro 😂🤣 Bravo!
I got so scared the first 40 seconds 😂 I thought I was on the wrong side of TH-cam
Thank you, Brian 💕
Ty Brian. My master plan was to dye my hair red and put on my best linen dress and sing rather poorly I might add, " Make up your mind" by Florence and the Machine in the middle of the living room. 😆
😂😂
😂
This is the first time I've ever saw your video, and Hiet, I like your style, you have a cool way of explaining your examples in a way anyone can understand. I'm an instant subscriber😁❤️
Thank you Brian. I love your sense of humor.🤣
" Feed him twice a day... if he makes a mess just tide up, bring him out for a walk, give him a biscuit as a reward ?! ".... I guess some people do like that to make their relationships work! But this would never really work!
I thought he was joking…
@@vivavidadela yes :)
Best coaching
I felt is a sign from the universe it came in the right time .so lost
I beginning to watch this kind of advice because of what I facing right now . Me and my best friend Im beginning to fall for him he doesn't know and suddenly he told me he meet the girl he like for all those flirting we do it's just me I'm fall but he told me I'm he's priority even he have like someone I'm crazy to choose to stay his side but now I watch this it's like a bomb to me it's really not okay this kind of feelings it's affecting my whole life it's so painful and I don't want to sleep so that It can't running my head
Hey Brian, love the content,you brilliant awesome great sense of humor man. Enjoy your walk.
please make more videos.. im always waiting
You are not bad...😉
I have ro learn that language.
Because at first I wanted to say how amazing and great you are..🙄
This is so true 💝
I really needed this thank you so much
0:12 Hell no! He is a grown man and I am not his mother.
Being exceptional = as side effects
Do I have to play games to get love and to give love? It is very sad, how men behave sometimes...
Your videos are awesome and so real! Thanks!
Great talk. I’ll be sure and watch your other videos. Smart man!
The alienation of celebrity, sigh* yes Brian it IS hard being this fabulous.. lol 😆
Love you man!
i love his vides. looking back i realized how pathetic i was...
Done this but still they left haha! I prefer dogs now 🤣
🎯🎯
Just be yourself babe
You are by far one of the best spoken ones I’ve seen here. Logical reasons, insight, wisdom. No fake bs abt “how 2 get a guy fASt”. Genuine tips. Thank you. Great tips for real men & love
You give shaggy from scoobie doo vibe 😋❤
🎯🎯
Brian Nox you are the best!!
Is there any way of seeking personal advice from you? Please do let me know
I love your dog metaphor introduction 🤣🤣🤣
Same 😂😂
I was like huh??😅🤣🤣🤣🤣 Made my day yoh, thanks so much
Love your work! 🤣
Great content! ❤
you are amazing
Can you do a video on being in a relationship with a narcissistic person
Look up Mental Healness. He is a healing narcissist who helps people effected by a partner with NPD
Hi Brian! Will you please upload some videos for online and long distance dating advice? Thank you!
You’re the best!! 🤩
I hope it will help me. Thanks, buddy btw I am first here
🤦♀️🤦♂️🤦♀️🤦♂️🤦♀️ trophies for you
Hi, I love your videos and a sense of humour
So good men are just golden retrievers
What I find odd is I wanted to do more and for the most part he wanted to do less and less, just go through fast food lines and run errands or sit in front of the TV. However the most exciting and unexpected and romantic weekend we spent was the last time.we saw each other and after that he was "too busy" and put everyone else ahead of me during the holidays. I never understood that. We were together for 10 months and suddenly the communication abruptly pretty much stopped about 1.5 weeks before it and he had no idea when he would have the time to see me.
I was trying to do inexpensive things together before that romantic weekend so we could make more memories. He would rather do those with his friends.
Typical. idk why dudes r like this
Why were you trying to do inexpensive things? And let the man do the trying/make the effort. It’s obvious he’s no longer interested and you need to move on. A woman should always keep a slight air of distance to her no matter how long you’ve been with a man. Never make the relationship the only thing you think about.
🤣🤣🤣 Take him for a walk!!!
Thanks for such an Extreme Video! 💚🤗🌴
This is really good
I was always half cut when I'd speak to him, always had my beer googles on,the first thing I ever said to him was" I love your name!"what did I get from him nothing!nat a thing!so I didn't like him(i actually hid from him the next time I saw him),,but I do now he's slightly amusing 🤣he knows I'm such a catch🥴🍻
Thank you so much ❤️
one does not have to be famous to be desired for the wrong reasons. A lady with a nice rack or attractive hips can be invisible to a man who has a weakness for those features and no self-control. Some women who learn they have this power have to decide if they are satisfied with using their bodies to take advantage of men, or if they would rather be loved for the part of them that will last forever. If you are using your beauty to manipulate a man he can lose interest in you for anyone he finds more beautiful in some way....
Sounds like how I deal with and raise my dogs..lol
Thank you so much