Dating Damaged Men | 7 dating rules for handling emotionally unavailable men

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ส.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 1.8K

  • @KevHick
    @KevHick  2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

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  • @ettajames3494
    @ettajames3494 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2058

    Rule # 1: Run
    Rule # 2: Run far
    Rule # 3: Run far far
    Rule # 4: Run far far far
    Rule # 5: Run far far far far
    Rule # 6: Run far far far far far
    Rule # 7: Just run!

    • @Story_and_Her
      @Story_and_Her 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Etta James this 😂🤣😂🤣

    • @Deemonster537
      @Deemonster537 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Yasssssssssss runnnnnnnnnn for ya lifeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

    • @Deemonster537
      @Deemonster537 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      U got dui iud go date that ratchet ova there n stay da fk away from me !!!!!! Thank god for hypergamy !!!!!! Stay away from the dusties n psycho paths 😱😱😱😱😱

    • @maidiallo
      @maidiallo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      😂😂🙌🏽

    • @janderson947
      @janderson947 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Run Forrest run 😂

  • @slashun9503
    @slashun9503 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3507

    “How to handle emotionally unavailable men”
    ....you don’t!

    • @KevHick
      @KevHick  4 ปีที่แล้ว +104

      🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

    • @Unapologeticallyme89
      @Unapologeticallyme89 4 ปีที่แล้ว +194

      Yep, stay far the fuck away because they will damage you in return 😂😂😂😂

    • @arnelabih1845
      @arnelabih1845 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Queen D I agree.

    • @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect
      @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect 4 ปีที่แล้ว +82

      @@Unapologeticallyme89 Girl...If the choice is between you and me, I'm choosing myself every time. Leaving these emotionally unavailable dudes in my dust 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️.

    • @stunguns64
      @stunguns64 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      😘 Another good one Son,. My friend, and I were listening to your very encouraging, and motivating video about about how if you're not satisfied with your weight,, then do something about it, and we are. We are walking an hour and a half each morning and then off to water aerobics, for 45 minutes. Not only does my son help you guys, I want you to know that he is also my own inspiration 🤗. I am so very proud of him, and I would like, to thank all of you , for your overwhelming and awesome, support and the love yu have shown Kevin. Kevin is the best gift that God has ever give me.

  • @d.abdelnabi1773
    @d.abdelnabi1773 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1881

    Trust me, you DON’T want to have ANYTHING to do with an emotionally damaged man. Unless you are a Psychiatrist, and getting paid by the hour.

    • @janellebrauns2753
      @janellebrauns2753 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Amen

    • @gorgeousnay7449
      @gorgeousnay7449 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Amen

    • @edwardbrannon7227
      @edwardbrannon7227 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      They're selfish irresponsible and immature run and they only think of themselves but only the best psychiatrist in the world could help them Maybe....

    • @dadedon305
      @dadedon305 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Debbie Nabi end of the day money women are centered from emotion but men cant be emotional but have to love a woman in whatever condition she is in and heal and love her at highest capacity even if broken 😢

    • @electricred91
      @electricred91 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Lol

  • @sipokazintlebi464
    @sipokazintlebi464 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1150

    Went through this shit... Gurl if he's emotionally unavailable, you better run for your life. The boy almost killed me giving me all kinds of heart palpitations and sleepless nights😓😢😅

  • @crystaldblevins
    @crystaldblevins 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2317

    Dating these type of men is exhausting. One problem after another. I learned my lesson.

    • @Hooligan.2
      @Hooligan.2 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Yesss but I need to learn my lesson

    • @alluringher_3203
      @alluringher_3203 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Beautifulsoul 😭after this video you know what to do lol

    • @natnat0576
      @natnat0576 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Yes lesson learned!!

    • @milliedamus888
      @milliedamus888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      So Exhausting 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ Tell me about it🤣🤣🤣

    • @Hotmamagotdatbomb
      @Hotmamagotdatbomb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Facts girl you not lying

  • @dnw75
    @dnw75 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1319

    Ladies if you're in a one sided situation & not getting what you want out of the deal, walk away.

    • @patriciaearley4177
      @patriciaearley4177 4 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      Yea,don't be less because he can't be more 🙏

    • @aliyakeller2573
      @aliyakeller2573 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Facts!!! Walk away with your held high!!

    • @seapearltoo1
      @seapearltoo1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@patriciaearley4177 Wow...so profound...and hit me deeply. Thank you for this reminder.

    • @patriciaearley4177
      @patriciaearley4177 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@seapearltoo1 You are very welcome Happy Thanksgiving and best wishes for 2020🙏👌🍀🥂

    • @Z5Z5Z5
      @Z5Z5Z5 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Faxx 🙌🏻🙌🏻

  • @Sentinidimarka
    @Sentinidimarka 4 ปีที่แล้ว +540

    “If he can’t overcome being damaged, let him go be damaged with somebody else”

    • @candacecasey5634
      @candacecasey5634 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Or by his damn self

    • @danaglover6801
      @danaglover6801 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Indeed💯

    • @zeneidavalencia6248
      @zeneidavalencia6248 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      For real! Those men are crazy and they’ve got the worst trust issues

    • @jout738
      @jout738 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I dont understand these kind of men staying damaged then.

    • @tsebosei1285
      @tsebosei1285 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hahaha

  • @HeavanlyValentine
    @HeavanlyValentine 3 ปีที่แล้ว +370

    LADIES WE ARE NOT A REHABILITATION CENTER!!! WE CANNOT CHANGE OR FIX HIM!!

    • @ariesh-jk7258
      @ariesh-jk7258 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Great advice

    • @jayjay1443
      @jayjay1443 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      FACTS SIS... FACTS💯💯

    • @TippyTiffGurl
      @TippyTiffGurl 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      And even rehabs can't fix a person who can't admit there's a problem to begin with...

    • @tre_4
      @tre_4 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@jayjay1443 , Then stop putting yourself in those situations

    • @Therealdonaldtrumpusa
      @Therealdonaldtrumpusa 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Or a therapist!*🙌🏼

  • @fortune4020
    @fortune4020 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1502

    "Stop screwing men who ain't your man if you're looking for a relationship "!!👍

    • @ritafatoma2898
      @ritafatoma2898 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      True talk 👌✌️

    • @SP-ig3vs
      @SP-ig3vs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      That's a good one.

    • @patriciaearley4177
      @patriciaearley4177 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Now that's some great advice 👍

    • @Rachellemc23
      @Rachellemc23 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Yeap exactly, just dont give him sex even if he brings it up

    • @zeitunadauto886
      @zeitunadauto886 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Thank you so much well said

  • @dr.dermixgirlmd7479
    @dr.dermixgirlmd7479 4 ปีที่แล้ว +623

    There’s only one rule...
    *Just don’t.*

  • @itsmiasaunders9678
    @itsmiasaunders9678 4 ปีที่แล้ว +349

    Rule #1: Run.
    Rule #2: Run faster
    Rule #3: Run, and don't look back sis.

  • @Pink_Rose3073
    @Pink_Rose3073 4 ปีที่แล้ว +220

    Focus on other things in life..Dont waste your time obsessing over an unavailable man....You will realize in the end that you just wasted your time, energy, tears and emotion over this man...

  • @bignie823
    @bignie823 4 ปีที่แล้ว +858

    I dated a damaged man. He kept whining about why his ex wife left him. I can see why she left him. Always crying victim, didn’t want to find solutions, and wanted a pity party. Typical narcissist.

    • @hotjobs101
      @hotjobs101 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      he may be a narc

    • @bignie823
      @bignie823 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Ebony Randolph I agree. He would say his ex wife was a narc. Typical narc behavior.

    • @aprilrule8132
      @aprilrule8132 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      bignie823 I just met a man like that and after hardly speaking with each other I finally completely blocked him yesterday

    • @bignie823
      @bignie823 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      April Rule Very good. You did yourself a huge favor.

    • @MiQue510
      @MiQue510 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      OMG! They never want to find solutions, have a million excuses why they can't do this or that, and most of all will never, ever, ever give you a direct answer!

  • @Pmatt1
    @Pmatt1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +856

    I don’t deal with men who show signs of emotional unavailability.. been there and it’s nothing we can do to “change” that.

    • @lisaw6219
      @lisaw6219 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Amen to that shit!

    • @Vera-dg3hf
      @Vera-dg3hf 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      What are the signs?

    • @Pmatt1
      @Pmatt1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +113

      Ballsy Bunny #1 sign is they do not invest any sort of emotion. Everything is sexual and somewhat robotic. #2 he will be inconsistent.. and throw mixed signals. #3 Everyone in his past is responsible for is inability to love, not him. This is just a few signs. #4 you plan the meet ups but they only happen on his time, you give and give and he gives just enough or absolutely nothing.

    • @jewell2352
      @jewell2352 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Truth

    • @Rinadeej
      @Rinadeej 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@Pmatt1 Girl yes he has all of those signs

  • @amasion2882
    @amasion2882 4 ปีที่แล้ว +126

    Unavailable means exactly that. Unavailable. The motives are irrelevant.

  • @clorenesimilien3033
    @clorenesimilien3033 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    This is the father talk that all young women needed to hear from their fathers.

  • @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect
    @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect 4 ปีที่แล้ว +410

    "Let him figure his own s**t out"
    "The main problem in his life is HIM"
    I felt those in my soul! You always come through with a timely messages like the big brother I always wanted.

    • @lovelykeeya532
      @lovelykeeya532 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Ms. Perfectly Imperfect lol we got the same picture, I thought I posted this comment

    • @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect
      @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@lovelykeeya532 lol I was looking at my comments thinking my phone was acting up again 😁

    • @misschameazy6399
      @misschameazy6399 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      You ain't never lied!! I had a guy that I recently dumped who's been asking me to insure a 🚗 car he bought with no driver's license lol .. Im like who does that?!!? ..He was so confident I would help/save him that he bought it without even asking me first..Boy! He was sadly mistaken! Im not your Momma/wife what do you think this is he tripping for real!! Lol😆
      I told him your on your own dude.. You'll figure it out..maybe your dumb ass shouldn't have bought it in the first place knowing you can't legitimize it on your own😒

    • @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect
      @Ms_T_Perfectly_Imperfect 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@misschameazy6399 In the words of Bishop RC Blakes Jr. "You don't have a man, you have a son!" 😒🙃🤣

  • @vickyvictoria4u
    @vickyvictoria4u 4 ปีที่แล้ว +254

    Married one of those, exwife was evil, but he failed to mention that he was the culprit of her actions. Guess what, he didn’t learn, I became his “evil” exwife as well. 🙄

    • @rachelcraig5047
      @rachelcraig5047 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      great advice,
      there,"s someone "out there" when you"re ready to accept better

    • @Amora_Shalom
      @Amora_Shalom 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Yes be careful, because a lot of men like this love to project their issues on the ex relationship, when all along they were the problem. Glad you got away

    • @vickyvictoria4u
      @vickyvictoria4u 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lady Bug me too.
      Thank you 🙏🏻

    • @KBTV904
      @KBTV904 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😵😵😵

    • @quarantinelife.
      @quarantinelife. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      YUP. "My ex was a psycho" - red flag. Little did you know that he made her like this 🤣👀

  • @janellebrauns2753
    @janellebrauns2753 4 ปีที่แล้ว +181

    I've loved a damaged man for too damn long. He didn't have the emotional ability to love me back. He broke me into tiny peices and still begs me til this day to give him another chance. I ain't got nothing left to give this man, he took everything and drained me. Now it's all about me and learning to love myself again and fix myself! I'll never date a damaged man again.. I learnt the hard way they turn around and break you!

    • @OffBlackKash
      @OffBlackKash 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Most of these trauma’s are passed down from generations, etc how to be a man, men in this society in my opinion, are way better than the men from previous generations

    • @lovelycaradine1814
      @lovelycaradine1814 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      This is me all day I loved a man for 23 years like this

  • @a.cleveland9210
    @a.cleveland9210 4 ปีที่แล้ว +272

    1. Don't try to do/fix everything for him.
    2. Don't try to be everything to him.
    3. Observe his commitment to change.
    4. If you're not his girlfriend, don't pretend to be.
    5. Recognize the "I've been hurt before " b.s.
    6. Don't settle for friends with benefits.
    7. Avoid the scarcity mindset.

    • @Cal_me_lady1
      @Cal_me_lady1 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Traits of Emotionally unavailable men

  • @missball404
    @missball404 4 ปีที่แล้ว +196

    It's far too draining!!!😒💔
    Too draining😣😫😖

  • @vanessaharris6341
    @vanessaharris6341 4 ปีที่แล้ว +317

    Real talk...don't let them spit that remedial ass game on you. Ladies work on developing tight cut off skills. You do deserve better!!!

    • @LS-cj8jd
      @LS-cj8jd 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Legit those tight cut off skills will save your life!

    • @vanessaharris6341
      @vanessaharris6341 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@LS-cj8jd Yasssssssss🙌🏾

    • @vanessaharris6341
      @vanessaharris6341 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @Latoya M. I had guy that I was getting to know but I sensed he could be controlling. He made statements like why do you workout so much, why do you wear weave, it's bad enough that I have to win your grown kids over, now I got to get to know your dog too. So I simply texted him after one of his wyd text. I said hey handsome I think you are nice guy however I don't feel that I'm the woman you should be pursuing. I wish you all the best and take care. The key is cut that BS off early. I have several examples some not so nice. It depends on the person. Dude sent me a D pic. I responded with an even larger D pic that I got off line. Never heard from him again. Silly Rabbit😜

    • @doyoulovemecheckyesorno7000
      @doyoulovemecheckyesorno7000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Nessa, you're so right girl! In these songs, I always hear guys spitting so-called " hot fire" in their lyrics about it being so easy for them to cut a woman off, while many of our lyrics are lovey-dovey, but we have to know when to turn the love off, and the power on.

    • @vanessaharris6341
      @vanessaharris6341 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@doyoulovemecheckyesorno7000 Yassssss!!! We should never allow ourselves to be a "pick me chick"

  • @mecca115able
    @mecca115able 4 ปีที่แล้ว +552

    I just wanna say I'm proud of you ladies on here. It starts with the woman. If a woman don't change how she deal with the men. These guys continue their madness. Stay strong. U have too.

    • @alketalule6106
      @alketalule6106 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Very accurate lady. If we dont change attitude and priorities, relationship female- male want change. Spread knowledge.

    • @theroyaltyrobinsons
      @theroyaltyrobinsons 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      💙

    • @jenbodhi1133
      @jenbodhi1133 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Completely agree

    • @PhanRegSop
      @PhanRegSop ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Precisely. We run this world, and need to work together to keep the standards high.

    • @heathermattar1686
      @heathermattar1686 ปีที่แล้ว

      So true

  • @ninababy6112
    @ninababy6112 4 ปีที่แล้ว +386

    I wish I would've heard this 2 years ago. I fell in love with a coworker (mistake #1!!). But he was "hurt" from his ex-wife and all that. I spent those 2 yrs trying to "heal him" and show him love and after all that I ended up broken and empty handed. NEVER TF AGAIN! But I'm grateful for my ex. He showed me how desperate and lonely I really can be and how I'll never fucking be again! 💯💯📢

    • @tru_kru_bahbee24
      @tru_kru_bahbee24 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Yesss!! That part sis!!

    • @swissmiss3532
      @swissmiss3532 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      SAME!!! Dated my coworker for almost 2 years now and I wanted to show him all the things too. Heal him and show him what a real woman do. NEVER AGAIN!

    • @shells_9091
      @shells_9091 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      💯

    • @kristyb8341
      @kristyb8341 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Omg I thought my situation was unique!! Good to know!!

    • @andreahoward2683
      @andreahoward2683 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Most of the time it’s probably not even the wife fault, he just played on your intelligence using his divorce.

  • @SunniWrld
    @SunniWrld 4 ปีที่แล้ว +693

    Nah ain’t no handling for me...too draining. Unavailable ppl tend to be stuck in their past & pain which make them unresponsive to ur kindness & good intentions towards them. Been there...I’d say stay farrrr away but that’s me tho. Nice video as always Kev!😏

    • @missball404
      @missball404 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Girrrl you speaking the truth no chaser!!!👏👏👏❤

    • @ak-47intelligence75
      @ak-47intelligence75 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      100%. I'm done.

    • @tanyaglover4039
      @tanyaglover4039 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      U my new best friend😊 Thank you for puttin it out there

    • @alluringher_3203
      @alluringher_3203 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Felttt this.

    • @TheSoulIsPrismaticTV
      @TheSoulIsPrismaticTV 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Whew, I felt this on a spiritual level! I just dealt with this and it was draining af. Never again! Moving on to happiness 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

  • @MiQue510
    @MiQue510 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Please be aware of men with mother issues. If she abandoned him, put her boyfriends before him, verbally abused him, or she died and left many unanswered questions why she neglected him just leave him. He has problems that has nothing to do with you and HE needs to seek help or you will find yourself forever chasing him and he'll always be running and you will be exhausted!

    • @Danita19941
      @Danita19941 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amen Sis

    • @brittanyb.1262
      @brittanyb.1262 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      When a man has an Abusive mom/mommy issues, more than likely he’ll be a Malignant Woman Hating Narcissist!

  • @LondonChicken
    @LondonChicken 4 ปีที่แล้ว +95

    Rule 1. Don't go out with him
    Rule 2. Don't go out with him
    Rule 3. Gurl don't go out with him
    Rule 4. Delete his number
    Rule 5. Date someone else, just not him
    Rule 6. Drop him and move on
    Rule 7. Didn't y'all hear me, DON'T GO OUT WITH HIM!
    You're welcome 😂

    • @micky3810
      @micky3810 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😂😂😂😂😂

    • @GardenManiia
      @GardenManiia ปีที่แล้ว

      Needed this!!

    • @tabithawaithira1202
      @tabithawaithira1202 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I love the emphasize 😂😂😂😂

  • @Vixinaful
    @Vixinaful 4 ปีที่แล้ว +132

    It's just like he says "I'm not ready for a relationship" No but you can text me half past twelve at night wanting to come over, huh? Ridiculess! "Don't sleep with emotionally damaged men or you'll be just as damaged" I was to the point where I got physically sick. Beware ladies, it can destroy you completely!

    • @Vixinaful
      @Vixinaful 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@gingerfellah5665 Well one year later I can tell you he turned out to be mentally ill, narcissism and psychosis, he hears voices and have been committed to the psych ward. He will eventually have the diagnosis schizophrenia and he has been emotionally abusing me for 3,5 yearsincluding a rape. I have reported him to the police and applied for a restraining order. It will as all other reports in my vountry be closed without any reprocautions but at least Ive tried. He also moved in on the street next to mine after 5 months "a panic move, couldnt stay with my mother bc shes a manipuative bitch whos destroyed me".. Right, so I'm pretty fucked. Also Ive broken it off 11 times and he doesnt get it. He comes back weeks or months later as if nothing happened. And claims he cant remember all the horrible things hes said..I got so sick from the stress I had an episode of an autoimmune disease, heartfailiure, lost 8kg and half my hair from this. Hes a walking demon.

    • @Vixinaful
      @Vixinaful 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@gingerfellah5665 Man, I can only imagine..These people are demonic.

    • @terranesha5784
      @terranesha5784 ปีที่แล้ว

      Was too lonely and desperate slept with him n got pregnant and still lonely smh .. lesson learned!

  • @morningsunshine0216
    @morningsunshine0216 4 ปีที่แล้ว +378

    I used to hate dating but now that I’m dating again with guidelines and a purpose. I love it! My main rule is just to not take anything personal and to stick to my guns and know what I want.
    A guy tried to pull that I been hurt before bs with me recently. And I told him we ALL been hurt like u need to just focus on making yourself whole again bc I’m not going to be smashing dude and wasting my time.
    And u know what he told me...
    It’s not wasting time if we both enjoy it. Like I really thought I was dumb AF and falling for the okie doke. I ghosted him and left him where I found him lol

    • @patriciaearley4177
      @patriciaearley4177 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Wow lowlife👎😶🤐

    • @christinalewis3635
      @christinalewis3635 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      👏👏👏 I'm the same way I dont take anything personally when it come to dating I look at every guy as a coworker

    • @doyoulovemecheckyesorno7000
      @doyoulovemecheckyesorno7000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Date with guidelines and a purpose, I think you could write a guideline for all women and sell it, girl! I do believe that we need to be moving with purpose as well, and just keeping things casual with men initially and not planning our weddings so soon, when it's usually not that serious.

    • @keiiras.5843
      @keiiras.5843 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Lmaoo sometimes you have to do that.

    • @cookiecookie8581
      @cookiecookie8581 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Damn did we date the same guy 😂

  • @rozwynn2349
    @rozwynn2349 4 ปีที่แล้ว +174

    I just don't, I'm tired. As soon as I realize the baggage outweighs the bounty, I'm done. I don't ghost or anything and I always let them know it is me, not them. I, however, am tired of putting myself back together after being hurt and then having to help someone else fix themselves also. Netflix and Postmates is looking really good these days.

  • @sicklecellnewyorksicklecel4766
    @sicklecellnewyorksicklecel4766 4 ปีที่แล้ว +272

    Dont date them. Just be their friends. Thats all. Stop with that struggle love bs or that build a bear. Nahhhh...

    • @squirrelabouttown6022
      @squirrelabouttown6022 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      I read this wrong! I thought you said “just date his friends” 😂

    • @Brianna-nc3og
      @Brianna-nc3og 4 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      I cant even be their friend

    • @lbrown1192
      @lbrown1192 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@Brianna-nc3og right I wouldn't even want to be their friend

    • @lbrown1192
      @lbrown1192 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @c1981 how about you all start caring for you all selves. Making sure you're good physically, mentally, emotionally, socially, spiritually, financially, and sexually.

    • @kristinesliwa2221
      @kristinesliwa2221 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Build a bear 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 favorite quote of the year 🔥

  • @TGray7598
    @TGray7598 4 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    Dating damaged men:
    Don’t !

  • @godseed79
    @godseed79 4 ปีที่แล้ว +137

    Yes, there are plenty of good men. That doesn't mean they're good for me specifically. Just being a good man doesn't automatically make him a viable partner. So it's a little more complicated than just saying, "there are plenty of good men". Although staying in a miserable situation with a man who also isn't qualified is not the solution, definitely better to be single and reconnect with yourself. ❤

    • @sssinfullyyours
      @sssinfullyyours 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      godseed79 These good men have small dicks too. LOL

    • @leymong5182
      @leymong5182 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Girl, that is not what he meant smh read between the lines

    • @Freespiritedqueen
      @Freespiritedqueen 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@sssinfullyyours haha!😄

    • @TippyTiffGurl
      @TippyTiffGurl 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Fuk'n Facts.I'll admit my exes were good guys...but not dating material...nor husband material when it came down to it.

  • @Abundance26
    @Abundance26 4 ปีที่แล้ว +118

    "His Astylist" 🤣.
    Man I remember being the fixer. Maaaaan. I did all that you listed NOT to do. The pain I felt in that situationship, I told myself NEVER again will I do that!

    • @traceylennon1204
      @traceylennon1204 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I was ROLLIN on that one!!!! 😆😂😂 @Abundance26

    • @Abundance26
      @Abundance26 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@traceylennon1204 what's even better is his facial expressions. Man I'm always cracking up like it's me and someone laughing 😄😄😄

  • @annej5550
    @annej5550 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Fell in love with a good yet emotionally damaged guy. He kept talking about how his exes dumped him, cheated on him, etc. He hasn’t moved on from anything lmao.

    • @shareikah
      @shareikah 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Girl tell me about it ! lol

  • @miyeshab451
    @miyeshab451 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    “You cannot upgrade a guys character or intent”
    PREACHHHH 🙌🏽

  • @shaquitastuart
    @shaquitastuart 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    When a Man loves you or is interested in you, you know it. You can feel it, it shows up in he actions whether damage or not. Like the man said, if it’s been more than a couple months and there No talk about a future? Then it ain’t one...

  • @jo1261
    @jo1261 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    I was one of these men. But someday one of these girls I was dating told me I should work on my self confidence. That made me think about it, do some research and eventually realize that I did indeed have to work on that. And it made me work on myself, she basically changed my life by saying that because I didn't know that that was my problem. What I want to say is: many man won't even know about themselves what their problem is. They aren't confident and don't build confidence because they don't know that that's actually the problem. You shouldn't date them indeed, but if you're planning to leave them I'd suggest that you could give them a 'hint' about what their issue might be so at least they have a chance to realize that and start working on theirselves.
    Can be a lack of confidence, victim mindset, 'nice guy syndrome', and much more. But many of the men just don't know. (Just like women anyways)

    • @LittleBambi777
      @LittleBambi777 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Do you really think a woman just leaves a man she loves without a hint? I talked to my ex thousand times in 10+ years and he just didn’t want to admit it or work on it at all. I felt even lonelier than being alone, actually I felt dead inside and I left, never look back.

  • @rarestrose3231
    @rarestrose3231 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    You spoke nothing but FACTS! Its like I'm a magnet for emotionally unavailable men. God keeps allowing them to come in to see if I've learned my lesson or not lol. From taking psychology, personal experience, and research I know its all stemmed from my childhood. Abandonment issues from my dad not being fully active in my life. I'm in the process of retraining myself out of that. It's toxic and draining asf. And then when the men who are emotionally available shoot their shot, I would feel that they were "lame" or "corny".. BUT now I've been really attracted to those types of men. I have to force myself to be believe I am worthy of that type of love & attention and that there are good men out there. Don't judge me, I'm learning!

  • @doyoulovemecheckyesorno7000
    @doyoulovemecheckyesorno7000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Nice tips Kev. First, things first ladies, your body is sacred, since this man is unavailable emotionally, you SHOULD NOT be available for him sexually or emotionally, until he can meet you halfway! An unemotionally available man hasn't healed his past, and as a result, his anger drives him, so he has to find a release, and he releases his frustrations out the most on the person he is in a relationship with. This is verbal and emotional abuse. You can do flips, cook, role play and etc, and it won't help the situation for the long term, you just add fuel to fire, the best course of action is to give him, a lamp to help him find his way back to the light, and some space to grow, and heal in hermit mode.

  • @kibuladesire8019
    @kibuladesire8019 4 ปีที่แล้ว +292

    Ladies stop reflecting yourself in this damaged man, you will be damaged as well, love the man who is infront of you not behind you. You can't handle an unavailable man because he can't give what he doesn't have Love!!! He can give you anxiety and low self esteem.Thanks Kevin.

  • @vannessafanning3200
    @vannessafanning3200 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Is anyone else on the floor because of how good this video is?😩😩😩😩

  • @oyance17
    @oyance17 4 ปีที่แล้ว +58

    I wish you did this video 3 years ago. This video was so helpful, my ex is damage . His dad committed suicide when he was 16 and he had to be the one to identify his body at the morgue. His stepdad abused him and his mom and eventually kicked him out the house when he tried fighting him back when he was a teen. He joined a gang to survive on the street, but eventually he made it off the street and today he is a lawyer , but he has never gotten therapy for the trauma he went through. It really affected him. I tried several times to convince him to see a therapist he refused . I couldn't handle his toxic outburst s anymore and realised I need to do what's best for me leave . Thanks for the videos they've helped understand a lot about men now when it comes to dating.

    • @margowelsch
      @margowelsch 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Eva Green Lover So sorry to hear what you've been through... I wish you all the possible strength in your life and certainly for being able to open up again to someone. I hope you will encounter someone that will be trustworthy, faithful, kind, understanding and patient. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you and especially the opening up to men who make you feel scared. Sending you prayers and love.. 🌼 I do know that there are a lot of different kinds of therapy, they may not be a solution, but I hope, if you do want to pursue that option, that it will work as an alleviation for you. ❤

    • @carichicago9942
      @carichicago9942 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I will pray for you. I’m sorry you went through this, you are a survivor. God bless you.

    • @kimkilgore148
      @kimkilgore148 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Blue Eyes I am also a survivor of horrific abuse.i do understand , I do have a phobia of strange men, I have diagnosed PTSD and in trauma therapy, but I have a fear of men and I stay in flight or fight mode constantly.
      When im around men.i get so tore up.i get panic attacks, but as for therapy,its all about the money, I've went tru several, and I'm still not 100% .

    • @diplomatdiplomat2800
      @diplomatdiplomat2800 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kimkilgore148 I am so sorry to hear about your challenges. How are getting on with the healing process? I hope you are doing great now. May I encourage you to also consider building a relationship with Jesus because He is a great healer. Are you aware that Jesus Christ loves you very much and deeply cares about you and you need Him? Please give Jesus a chance to love you unconditionally as your Lord and personal Savior ❤️

    • @kimkilgore148
      @kimkilgore148 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@diplomatdiplomat2800 Jesus is a man himself. I don't do good with men!

  • @geelee2964
    @geelee2964 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

    “If you lay with enough damaged men, you will be as damaged as them...” Ladies, that’s why knowing, having, and owning your self worth is priority and key. You come first, you love yourself first and you keep that boundaries. Please.

  • @freebird5469
    @freebird5469 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    What I have learned from my experience in relationships with damaged people (both genders) is that - Givers need to have limits, because takers never do. Damaged people are takers -emotionally, energetically, physically. You don't help them by all your giving, instead you end up drained and exhausted - and they wont care! Nor will they be any less damaged by your giving.

    • @Ferrys1220
      @Ferrys1220 ปีที่แล้ว

      💕💕💕💕

    • @Micahsophia
      @Micahsophia ปีที่แล้ว

      The truth no matter how positive you are & communicate effectively, they will still bring up negativity & expect you to share love to them they ain’t giving you

    • @jodirichardson2820
      @jodirichardson2820 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you so much for that, you don't know how much I needed to hear that, now I just need to memorize that shit. Seriously you are awesome

  • @CrystalDatingCoach
    @CrystalDatingCoach 4 ปีที่แล้ว +112

    FIRST RULE. Don't Date them!! Hurt. Wounded. Were Dumped. Payback is you. He will hurt you exactly like he was hurt

    • @Freespiritedqueen
      @Freespiritedqueen 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      FACTS!!

    • @kyd9269
      @kyd9269 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I wouldn’t though I’d just try to be good enough-

    • @tre_4
      @tre_4 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Freespiritedqueen , I Agree. Thats What We Do

    • @samanthamakhafola3014
      @samanthamakhafola3014 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      True

  • @SR77736
    @SR77736 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Exactly. My favorite excuses:
    -it is or was the wrong time
    time
    -I have a lot on my plate right now
    -lets just go with the flow and see what happens
    -titles make things weird
    -everytime I tell someone I like them or open up, something bad happens
    I-I want to take things slow (while trying to bumrush you for sex)
    -we will commit when the time is right
    -we will commit if you stick around (while they ghost you or push you away)
    away)
    -I haven't found the right woman yet (chances are you may not be her either)
    -ive been hurt before and I dont wanna be hurt again (who tf does?)
    -I know I promised you we would be official and you'd meet my mom. But that was last week. I changed my mind (and nothing drastic occured)
    -youre forcing a committment (all bc you put your foot down and don't give in)
    -we arent compatible for a relationship, but we are compatible for sex! Why don't we try that!? 🙄 Whiners. Foh with this bs

    • @LittleBambi777
      @LittleBambi777 ปีที่แล้ว

      Everytime we needed to talk about problems or feelings, he ran away, so I heard the 2nd one a lot lol

    • @sukiarts
      @sukiarts 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      These men are always changing their mind for some reason. And the second one is like "I'm busy". As if they suddenly became busier with their lives when before they were very responsive and sweet with you.

  • @mrsmjj81
    @mrsmjj81 4 ปีที่แล้ว +59

    This video has me near tears. I am a brilliant, educated, talented, loving, and thoughtful woman who is currently in love with the exact type of man you describe here. The part that hurts most is I KNOW what I'm putting up with is dumb and yet I continue because I am so afraid there's no one else. Your insight on the scarcity myth is helpful because that's exactly why I'm allowing this. I'm gradually gaining the strength to break free. Thank you for this video.

    • @evka24
      @evka24 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      u deserve the same as u give

    • @43cassy
      @43cassy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Self love. Find your soul purpose. Healing is a grieving process. Mourn the old and all of the dead weight, people and outdated ideas you had about love. Change the pathology. Many times, attracting unavailable partners is the Universe way of showing us our own emotional injuries that need healing. Meditate. It will all come together for you soon. Wishing much peace & light!💫

    • @Nawah22
      @Nawah22 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      You took the words out of my mouth. There will be no one else...

    • @yeswing10
      @yeswing10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's better to be alone, doing you're own thing, than being ghosted emotionally and physically. You're alone right now.

    • @jodirichardson2820
      @jodirichardson2820 ปีที่แล้ว

      See you said it girl, I'm right there with you, exactly. What adds to my "being crazy" over this guy, is I'm starting to think that with all I've been thru, wich hell yeah made me stronger when I was younger. Has now taken its toll hell, I'm 50 years old now. I'm not as young as I used to be so ya know, back in the day I wouldn't have cared about this chump, but now. Shit.

  • @patricededrick
    @patricededrick 4 ปีที่แล้ว +124

    How i used to be. But GOD🙌🏼 HEALing , empowerment, increase in spirituality, more blessings, a better me and definitely ALWAYS SELF LOVE YOURSELF 1ST✔ !

    • @patricededrick
      @patricededrick 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Kirah Kane 😘👑💎✨🙏💅💃

    • @jodian2986
      @jodian2986 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That's the growth I am striving for....

    • @patricededrick
      @patricededrick 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@jodian2986 you will . this practice is a daily thing tbh im still enhancing.

    • @dawnartrey6001
      @dawnartrey6001 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Amen!!!

  • @MsFree2u
    @MsFree2u 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    I’m not perfect and I’ve experienced some draining relationships. So now I know better and do better. Ladies require a man to be “secure”. Secure, emotionally, financially, mentally and spiritually. If he doesn’t have at least these Qualities....run like hell ✌🏽

  • @dianaortiz8021
    @dianaortiz8021 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Well said. It’s our choice to be in a healthy relationship. We deserve a man that is willing to be a parter. True love should never be miserable. If a man is unemotionally unavailable, move on. You ARE NOT going to change him.

  • @gabs_c38
    @gabs_c38 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I JUST walked away from something like this. Super draining and i deserve someone who is ready. I do not have to be the one to fix anyone or be the one to make him feel whole when that’s his job to do.

    • @ladykhustle
      @ladykhustle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Exactly. It's his job to rescue himself!

  • @rachellegoodwin4868
    @rachellegoodwin4868 4 ปีที่แล้ว +196

    Damage people hurt damage people 💁🏿🙋🏿🤷🏿✌🏿
    #CELIBATELIFE #WORKINGONMYSELF

    • @Hautenani
      @Hautenani 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I’m thinking about being celibate but my sex drive is very, very high. Any tips? I’m so tired of ain’t shit men.

    • @enigmaticladypisces3169
      @enigmaticladypisces3169 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Rachelle Goodwin ❤❤❤❤yes!

    • @enigmaticladypisces3169
      @enigmaticladypisces3169 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Hautenani play with it baby! Can't nobody make me cum like me. 😂 If you must play with it morning, noon and night... Do so. Lol I do that until my angels bless me. I'm so tired of the unemotional 1 minute men. 😢😂

    • @missp8527
      @missp8527 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      To a point that I don't know y people date. I'm peaceful ❤️😍

    • @patriciaearley4177
      @patriciaearley4177 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      👎

  • @raeburt2551
    @raeburt2551 4 ปีที่แล้ว +84

    I don’t think we should group all emotionally unavailable together.
    Don’t overlook his advice that says observe your prospective partner and see if they take the initiative to do the work and continue to do it.
    Everyone has been hurt and even damaged. Please point out the person who is completely emotionally in tact without a history.
    What we want to avoid is people who have no self motivation and use people to fill voids they should be healing.
    Women are taught to do the work for their partner because of some false belief we’re made to nurture and be someone’s comfort woman. Let go of that belief and you’ll start investing in relationships with people who do the same.
    Basically I’m saying: listen to this video and listen to again.

    • @clarissaidonthateonmonday178
      @clarissaidonthateonmonday178 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I was looking for this comment. I've been dating a guy for a year and the long story short about it, he's going/gone through some pretty tough situations regarding his basic necessities (work,home,health and family). So I was in search of some advice to get me through the tough times but he absolutely is working on himself and I believe will bounce back better then ever. Its just if I am emotionally mature to understand he needs some time (we're talking a few weeks) and know this is not personal.

    • @inyourdreams444
      @inyourdreams444 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Potential isn't good enough to place my heart in your hands. If he's taking initiative that's great, he needs to take that time alone to do the internal work to heal himself. Oftentimes we get caught in the crossfire by waiting around on this "potential". If someone is unavailable he will not mentally be able to communicate, love, nor support you properly when you need it. So in the meantime, you are forfeiting the love you deserve. It will be a one-sided situation while you wait for that change. No thanks. I will wish you well and if I'm still available when you finally are, maybe we can try again. Eventually you will begin to question yourself, become confused and your self-esteem will decline. Literally ended a dating situation today because of those emotions while I tried to "wait" it out for almost the past year.

  • @Anna-gg1wp
    @Anna-gg1wp 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    I was dealing with emotionally unavailable guy he burned me . Left emotional and mental scar..I learned my lesson no more psychotic guys with to much baggage ..emotionally unavailable but 🍆available.

  • @kudiyyy
    @kudiyyy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Damaged men have been hurt one time and given up. That’s how weak they are. Instead of growing, they hold everything inside and are too d u mb to understand themselves and reflect

  • @lifetobelived9102
    @lifetobelived9102 4 ปีที่แล้ว +129

    I definitely am a broken bird person not only with men but, also, with my female friendships. I've been secluded for a while not feeling well. At first my friends would call and periodically checked on me. Then recently I noticed that my friends had not checked on me for months. At first I was salty they hadn't then I thought well I hadn't reached out. So I have reached out a bit but you know I was there for them through multiple things and I guess I just didn't get the same back. Sometimes relationships are just meant to end if one person is the one giving all the energy. I'll wait to see if they just fade away.

    • @user-zc7zr9xn5s
      @user-zc7zr9xn5s 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Life tobelived me too. It hurts. I’m always giving, making sure I remember birthdays, always showing up. It’s not reciprocated, but leaves me with no one. So I continue.

    • @naichar9475
      @naichar9475 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Damn it’s not just me, my therapist told me I’m playing games with my silence... I call it claiming myself back.

    • @kates8183
      @kates8183 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Nai Char me too. I remind myself that I’ve gotta put myself first now and that’s how I’m claiming myself back.

    • @nurarich4945
      @nurarich4945 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I felt the same ,then I realized the problem was with me.
      Never give expecting anything in return,it’s not a debt and it’s not fair.give because you care and because it’s who you’re.

    • @ebonyessence8
      @ebonyessence8 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I hope you're in a better mental space today!👸🏾💖

  • @BYCDatingStoriesandAdvice
    @BYCDatingStoriesandAdvice 4 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    Hey! The first two minutes said it ALLLLLLLLLL!!! 🙌🏽 So many of us needed to hear this before we even started dating! 🤦🏽‍♀️

  • @alayna286
    @alayna286 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I needed this video so badly a few months ago for the last guy I was with. I dated a good guy with sooo much PTSD and should've run once he asked that I trust him. He never cheated, but he dazzled me with his caring nature before he retreated back into issues, leaving me wondering where the hell that goofy, seemingly confident guy working on himself went.

  • @feralproud472
    @feralproud472 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Preach! 🙌🏽 'let him go be damaged with someone else' 💯💗

  • @ak-47intelligence75
    @ak-47intelligence75 4 ปีที่แล้ว +293

    Also, just a piece of advice from me, please dont sleep with a man UNAVAILABLE or AVAILABLE before you're married.
    Body count matters , stop letting men stick it in you and LEAVE like you didnt exist.
    On top of that, you dont know where these people have been.
    They could be infected.

    • @LS-cj8jd
      @LS-cj8jd 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      1000000% !!!!!!!

    • @DanButters1
      @DanButters1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Real talk sis. 100% celibate now

    • @Vera-dg3hf
      @Vera-dg3hf 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I love this

    • @thebusinesswoman23
      @thebusinesswoman23 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Infected is right. There's an infection in their heart/soul and their body. Lol

    • @muthangyam
      @muthangyam 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Love that

  • @spookykittty
    @spookykittty 4 ปีที่แล้ว +120

    Your timing with this is perfect. Thank you!

    • @missball404
      @missball404 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes!!!!!!⏰⏳🛎

  • @christineboutin4971
    @christineboutin4971 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Thanks for this video, I'm in a relatable situation where the man I have been seeing for 3 months has not been giving me his all. He's been inconsistent with plans and only sees me when it's convenient for him. We have great chemistry and dynamics, however he has unresolved strings from his past keeping us from advancing. I took a month apart from him to rethink our "relationship" and I come to the realization that it will never go anywhere and he's comfortable with how things are. I don't have the time to nurture and build a man. He needs to want to work on his unresolved issues before being with anyone.

  • @burlsink31
    @burlsink31 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I really enjoyed listening to your message- I was married to a emotional unavailable man for 36 years - You think I would Have learned from that shitty abuse-- well I'm in that rabbit hole again! It's about time I finally get information and knowledge that will finally lead me to my happiness -

  • @tywanbrown3034
    @tywanbrown3034 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Hey Kev, Great Video. True Facts you stated!! Also men who don’t have a good relationship with their mothers or feel like their mothers neglected them in some type of way are hard to deal with also. They tend not to trust woman very easily.

  • @missghong3254
    @missghong3254 4 ปีที่แล้ว +59

    Dating such a guy is like Covid-19. Everyday new cases 😂 I just left one real early in the relationship & boy did I dodge the bullet whew! 🥰

  • @gaming12-l4x
    @gaming12-l4x 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    This video is on point!! But same goes for us too! don’t mislead someone just because you don’t want to be alone, in revenge to someone else or you need financial support. People nowadays are so much in need of emotional support or financial support that have them stay I’m toxic relationships.. being emotionally and financially independent is a skill we all most need to learn.

    • @christinalewis3635
      @christinalewis3635 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      natalia escobar yep cause a lot of people are looking help not love

    • @senoraespinosa6176
      @senoraespinosa6176 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes sis, this guy I met on bumble 🙄ikr.. we talked met for lunch
      He knows i'm buying a home and i'm very financially set. His house burnt down long story short I asked if he was going to get a new home and he said yes i will. Then his talking About me and him being together like relationship. Well then he starts telling me what house i should get. Oh hell no.... he said u should move near me get a home with land and a workshop I could work on my cars there.
      I quickly said well what's the news on ur home u found anything? No not yet no sir no sir.. then another day I met his son who is 17 and his son asked about what kind of house i'm trying to get. 🤷🏽‍♀️ r u asking that? So his dad quickly responded hopefully my us. I said well have u been looking for a home for u? I'm not sure when i'm moving. He said no I haven't I think i'm going to live with my mom a lil longer. I hope he don't think i'm moving him in hello no.. that's mine only I need to meet me half way with at least having your own stuff

    • @iyamom4
      @iyamom4 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@senoraespinosa6176 You would have needed to ask more questions if you were still interested. He was treating you like the golden ticket. Why he told his sone about you is definitely questionable. That is why I am staying single cause it is all a game for some

    • @andreahoward2683
      @andreahoward2683 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@senoraespinosa6176 BLOCK HIM AND RUN

  • @flatandsplat
    @flatandsplat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Thanks for this! I've just entered into a FWB with a guy who says he doesn't want a relationship because he's damaged from his past marriage. It's not felt right to me. You've just convinced me to throw him to the curb! I can tell its going to mess me up and it's the last thing I need. If he wants me, he needs to do the right thing.

  • @WickedWordzz
    @WickedWordzz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Let them get through their issues. What is meant to be will be. Whether you like it or not.

  • @zuphurialoveriecutscoupons
    @zuphurialoveriecutscoupons 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    Thank you so much Sir for this video. I was just talking to God about this and asking him to show me the way to break this pattern.

    • @zuphurialoveriecutscoupons
      @zuphurialoveriecutscoupons 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@NewYorkNadia Thank you. I appreciate the thoughfulness and the help.

    • @TheSHAY1806
      @TheSHAY1806 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@zuphurialoveriecutscoupons me too..I'm way too nice.

    • @43cassy
      @43cassy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Self love. Find your soul purpose. Healing is a grieving process. Mourn the old and all of the dead weight, people and outdated ideas you had about love. Change the pathology. Many times, attracting unavailable partners is the Universe way of showing us our own emotional injuries that need healing. Meditate. It will all come together for you soon. Wishing much peace & light!💫

    • @zuphurialoveriecutscoupons
      @zuphurialoveriecutscoupons 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@43cassy Amen and beautifully said.

  • @JustineMfulama
    @JustineMfulama 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    RIGHT! IS👏HE👏WORTH👏IT? Getting involved with an emotionally unavailable man will lead to distress, so he needs to show some kind of effort on his part. Don't just get involved with him because you want to change him, get involved because you can see he wants to change himself. GREAT TIPS, THANKS FOR SHARING!

    • @KevHick
      @KevHick  4 ปีที่แล้ว

      My pleasure 😇

  • @c.c100
    @c.c100 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Heard that same sh** before, thanks for verifying my exact thoughts. I love me some me and this is the year I'm taking back my power to be the most powerful weapon to enhance my self mastery. I lost alot but I've gained so much more. I am getting rid of people and things that no longer serve me!!

  • @ms.bizlady2956
    @ms.bizlady2956 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    This was by far the best video ever. Keep it real Kev that's what I like about you. If he can't define the relationship he's just using you until something better comes along.

  • @ShadaeMastersAstrology
    @ShadaeMastersAstrology 4 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    “And do not collect $200 dollars lol,” this statement had me rotfl 😂. Great video as always, honest and straightforward! No chaser....

    • @Godspit6066
      @Godspit6066 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What's that mean?

  • @JMeyer1112
    @JMeyer1112 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Been there done that. I just don't have that type of time, nor do I want that type of assignment🤣🤣
    Ladies leave the broken winged bird alone 💅🏾

  • @sunnyday3117
    @sunnyday3117 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I’m hollering at the side notes 😂😂😂.

  • @budgetrebelgoals
    @budgetrebelgoals 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Last man I tried to get to know said he was damaged goods.He was hurt.I was hurt too...I got over it.

    • @dnw75
      @dnw75 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      At least he was honest about it, so you could walk away.

    • @bubbles1978
      @bubbles1978 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      dnw75 not really, that just their justification

    • @budgetrebelgoals
      @budgetrebelgoals 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@bubbles1978 Just tell me. I'm not going to invest in you outside of sex. Smh. I hate how much I settled smh

  • @JuicyFruityify
    @JuicyFruityify 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Watching this for my gorgeous ex who had an absent father and was used to being pumped and dumped by the players she was attracted to. I wasn't a player. Best to just walk away. Too much drama for me.

  • @tl6231
    @tl6231 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My boyfriend is working on himself as I have been doing too. We don't claim to be perfect that's for sure and are doing the best we can together. I talk a lot to him and he texts or calls me first thing every morning, does little things to show he cares and is humane and loving towards me personally. I'm not used to this treatment and I cry. He said he's gotten help and doesn't claim to being wronged. Neither do I. For sure, if he wasn't working on being an even better guy, I'd literally run the other way! We're both runners by the way.

  • @chrisbigarani1691
    @chrisbigarani1691 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You give the best advice! I'm blown away how at my age (60) I'm STILL learning about love...growing up without a dad to school me sucked!

  • @crownedmelaninqueen
    @crownedmelaninqueen 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I feel this whole thing. I have a friend a good friend I really love him , but he goes away for moments at a time. I thought 💭 because of our long friendship, he’d tell me when he was going off the grid.

  • @elitephantom9690
    @elitephantom9690 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I always believe mother and son's relationship is so important. Same way as how men see women and their father.

  • @cliquesnvues
    @cliquesnvues 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    This was a tough listen

  • @brandnubraids2599
    @brandnubraids2599 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    You ain't gone heal him with no 🐱...🤣🤣🤣🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯

  • @tiasinclair9741
    @tiasinclair9741 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Should not Allow the damaged woman to mess over the good man. Too

  • @lmdh814
    @lmdh814 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    I was missing your videos because you haven't posted much lately but you came back with a vengeance and redeemed yourself 😂😂😂 Great content, honest, and straight to the point. Just how it needed to be.

    • @ajones9
      @ajones9 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hey im an amber J too ha

  • @Z5Z5Z5
    @Z5Z5Z5 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    "His stylist, his mom, his accountant" lmafo

  • @acbc3543
    @acbc3543 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    You can’t fix a damaged man. He’s broken . Find a refreshing relationship

  • @TheAttractionTriggers
    @TheAttractionTriggers 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    *Dealing with emotionally unavailable men can be tough, but understanding how to navigate these situations is empowering. Let's value ourselves and seek relationships where our emotional needs are met.*

  • @sherriejackson5989
    @sherriejackson5989 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    Now this some good stuff right here!! Got me all the way together!

  • @j-tenn226
    @j-tenn226 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Geez I just got done dating a man who was bipolar, and used that as an excuse to be perpetually unhappy. He would call me to vent for hours whenever he was suicidal, I would suggest going to the park and he'd say " I'd rather rot" . I'd bring him ice cream, let him use my car, etc, and got nothing out of it. It's empty and I'm still healing.

  • @heatherberry01
    @heatherberry01 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Blessing for the straight REALNESS Brethren 🙏🏽 🙏🏽 the empowerment is gold!

  • @La-Toya0488
    @La-Toya0488 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    By looking at this, it made me realize I have "Baby Bird" syndrome. Your videos are truly helping me evolve into a better person; thank you so much, Big Bro 🙏🏿 ❤
    #NeededThisBigBroTalk ❤❤❤

  • @Autumnbaby25
    @Autumnbaby25 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Lmao! "Or call Tyrone" I love the Erica Badu references. Solid video and advice as always.

  • @nolwandlemkwanazi6627
    @nolwandlemkwanazi6627 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You have just given me my key to release myself....Now I can focus on my daughter 🙏🏾

  • @natashad9261
    @natashad9261 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    “get your weak ass outta here” I love this guy what he says is so strait up it’s facts. We need to hear this shit

  • @lydiamusima5840
    @lydiamusima5840 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I won’t dare. It’s a matter of time wasting and energy draining

  • @KAAT2239
    @KAAT2239 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Awesome advice!!! Been there ( broke all 7 rules) and was miserable 😖 i am happy now BY MYSELF!

    • @KAAT2239
      @KAAT2239 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      bigjayking24 thats all behind me!

  • @chezza2116
    @chezza2116 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I was seeing a damaged man on and off... nothing serious.... it don't matter how many times I've blocked him... he still finds a way to get to me.... he's no good for me at all.. damaged 100%

    • @chitown7110
      @chitown7110 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Just continue to block and ignore any unfamiliar phone numbers and make your social media private. You need to completely ghost him until he gets the message. A man can't continue to harass you unless you are leaving a door open someway.

    • @annszojak513
      @annszojak513 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He might be a Narcissist.