How to Delete Your Feelings For a Man And Remove His Power Over You!

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 ก.พ. 2025
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ความคิดเห็น •

  • @roser8911
    @roser8911 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +667

    If someone truly values and wants you in their life… they will never put themselves in a position to lose you. So it’s all about his ego games.

    • @Nageena11
      @Nageena11 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

      True😢

    • @briattnybrittany6843
      @briattnybrittany6843 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +30

      that part‼️ that's exactly what i always say. people who want you around will treat you like they want to be around you. they'll keep you around, and they won't let anything come between you and them ❤

    • @mhal2
      @mhal2 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@roser8911 WHAT IF men are responding to how us women treat them??! Check out Alison Armstrong's work (The Queen's Code) 👑.

    • @Katie-Lou039
      @Katie-Lou039 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Unless they're an alcoholic

    • @jzwalz51robin45
      @jzwalz51robin45 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      That is true for men AND women...

  •  4 หลายเดือนก่อน +390

    "He's not the right guy for you, otherwise you wouldn't be going through all of that."

    • @Salomea369
      @Salomea369 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Unless you on a Twin Flame journey lov🤣🤣

    • @RJacobson-lc1vw
      @RJacobson-lc1vw 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

      Great quote!!! I wrote it down. How do I hammer that into my head so it sticks, tho?

    • @madhuridas4745
      @madhuridas4745 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Very Well Said 😂

    • @steadypace1262
      @steadypace1262 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Something so simply said can be very enlightening.🎯

    • @alyssahall6981
      @alyssahall6981 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Hammer man! Ha! Never happened .

  • @Biologist557
    @Biologist557 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +231

    I vacillate between being disgusted with his bad behavior and missing him. Really sucks.

    • @user-lt3yb4fm6q
      @user-lt3yb4fm6q 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +39

      Me too. I was discarded 2 weeks ago, one hour after he told me I was the love of his life and how he wanted to retire with me.
      I went to therapy after days of wishing I was dead. I could barely even move.
      Now I am better, slowly.
      I still miss him a lot, our conversations and the deep happiness I felt I his company. But I have finally also reached a point of knowing: I can never trust him, if I take him back it will only be a question of months before it happens again.
      Only weak and insecure people do this to their partner

    • @Realmariah510
      @Realmariah510 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +52

      You probably don’t miss him, but the idea of him and what could have been

    • @lauralittle6899
      @lauralittle6899 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Oh me too !!!!😢

    • @lauralittle6899
      @lauralittle6899 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

      ​@@Realmariah510true. The man he portrayed himself to be was big lie 😢

    • @jzwalz51robin45
      @jzwalz51robin45 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      Yeah! I know women who do the same thing...

  • @HM-ec5vi
    @HM-ec5vi 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +160

    Choose what chooses you. If he doesn’t choose you, move on.

    • @elianad2083
      @elianad2083 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      It's not that easy. You have to mourn the loss of a love before "Moving on" otherwise you are just rebounding.

    • @nancyleiper9307
      @nancyleiper9307 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@elianad2083well put

    • @nancyleiper9307
      @nancyleiper9307 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Truth

    • @susanne25262
      @susanne25262 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      No. You choose 1st. I just chose mine in the middle of an an appt? I interuppted him and said. You are so very hansoms"...lolol

    • @susanne25262
      @susanne25262 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Right.

  • @ireefree2024
    @ireefree2024 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +317

    Forgive yourself of being blindsided and also let go of the fantasy world in your mind 😊

    • @PolarBear-mj9wt
      @PolarBear-mj9wt 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Blindsighted not blindsided 😂

    • @ireefree2024
      @ireefree2024 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      @@PolarBear-mj9wt many thanks 😊

    • @uhohotdog3483
      @uhohotdog3483 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Well said I get it 👍

    • @laineymac8430
      @laineymac8430 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      ​@@PolarBear-mj9wtblind sided is correct.

    • @Soouber
      @Soouber 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      this!

  • @ruthreichert6563
    @ruthreichert6563 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +88

    I had a different reaction. When I finally realized I wasn't being valued and that his preferences lay in a married woman, I didn't continue to love him. My emotions went to absolute disgust for him, a sense of betrayal and utter disgust.

  • @ckl5801
    @ckl5801 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +71

    I don’t want to give this person any more mental real estate rent free!! 😊

  • @Thaicatlove
    @Thaicatlove 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +33

    Love yourself always more than a man. Never put someone first, when all you are to them is an option. Learn the lesson and forgive yourself. You need real love.

  • @feebsfilms
    @feebsfilms 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +253

    Brian is the big brother we all wish we had that sits us down, tells us the truth about that guy that didn't deserve us or appreciate our worth and even when our hearts are breaking makes us smile and have hope again.
    I listened to him two years ago when my dreams of being with the person I loved just weren't coming true.
    I did the breakup course
    I listened to Brian when he said he wasn't the guy for you, if he was, he would not have let you go.
    I went no contact. I got on with life. Two months later I met the love of my life. Every morning I wake up, have coffee with this man that is in love with me, devoted to me and makes me smile every day, I think I'm so grateful I have him. I'm so grateful I listened to Brian and didn't get stuck trying to force something that would never have worked. I love your work Brian! Keep doing what you do best ❤

    • @cup_o_TMarie
      @cup_o_TMarie 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      🤍👏💫

    • @kittthompson
      @kittthompson 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      This is gorgeous and really inspiring. I’m so pleased for you both ♥️

    • @feebsfilms
      @feebsfilms 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@kittthompson Thank you! ❤️

    • @vixter28
      @vixter28 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ❤❤❤❤

    • @07home
      @07home 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Thank you there is hope for me too then NOW I Will Love myself forst and go NO contact ❤❤🇩🇰

  • @Naamanah127
    @Naamanah127 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +137

    When it's over, then it's over . Thanks for the honesty and truth.

  • @jessiejohnson1208
    @jessiejohnson1208 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +130

    I'm taking a break from all relationships to reset and find myself again.
    I can feel the void and the scary unknown. My goal is to be comfortable and confident just being single. When I feel ready for a new relationship, hopefully, I will be a better, happier, and more secure partner to be with.

    • @6334-t9e
      @6334-t9e 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I've been doing this since the beginning of this year...it's peaceful and have tike for myself that I never had when trying so hard to make my marriage work, raise my children and career. Still working a stressful job, but it's soooo nice going home after work and doing whatever I want. May do another year, who knows?
      Best wishes to you in your journey...take time for you. You won't regret it❤️‍🩹🙏

    • @Wishpool
      @Wishpool 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      Same here... except my 'break' is going on 4.5 years. 🤣 I'm 57, never married, nearly every serious bf has cheated on me. I just feel done with dating, but I still have a sliver of hope I'll meet the right guy someday.

    • @mariefricchione437
      @mariefricchione437 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      They ALL cheat you know! I got this from my therapist!

    • @zippi771
      @zippi771 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@mariefricchione437 he/ she said that all men cheat? It’s really hopeless out there for us 😩

    • @danicaharley6273
      @danicaharley6273 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@mariefricchione437not all men

  • @BhavanaEtamsetti
    @BhavanaEtamsetti 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

    Usually,I dont comment any video.Your video has moved me so much that after watching your video,i immedaitely wanted to comment. I wanted to stay away from the person,due to whom I am facing all these.Today,i am leaving him.Wish me luck for my future

    • @mariamnzau
      @mariamnzau 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      You got it!

  • @kourtneyw8442
    @kourtneyw8442 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +46

    He kicked me out and made me struggle. And then wants to send me good night texts like we are still together no way. Thank you.

    • @orangetulip1261
      @orangetulip1261 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      You go, gurl! 🎉💪

    • @danicaharley6273
      @danicaharley6273 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Ignore those cheap text messages girl

  • @Hannah.1911
    @Hannah.1911 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +39

    I broke up with him today. 8 weeks no contact (I felt miserable), yesterday I called him out. He apologized and said "I know, I'm the problem. I don't want to mess it up." And still managed to make it worse.
    Now he's blocked and I am so relieved.

    • @honeyyu1474
      @honeyyu1474 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      Im glad your out because youll continue the loop if not

    • @Hannah.1911
      @Hannah.1911 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@honeyyu1474 Thank you

    • @crose1469
      @crose1469 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I had to break up with my man 3 weeks ago. Immediately went no contact. I love him but he was abusive, so I absolutely cannot take him back. Ever. I did the right thing but it still hurts 💔 Looking forward to a brighter future on my own.

    • @Hannah.1911
      @Hannah.1911 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@crose1469 I'm sorry to hear that. Sending you lots of love ❤️

  • @Vixinaful
    @Vixinaful 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    Its exactly like this. Its hard to leave a dream of a future with someone. The dream keeps you in.

  • @Musicisthelanguageoflove
    @Musicisthelanguageoflove 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +130

    He did string me along, for 17 months. Not 17 years luckily. Haha. It is hard when we find someone who offers us something we really want that seemed possible and viable at last, then they take it away abruptly for no good reason. It makes us question ourselves as to why, when we should always have been questing their behaviour patterns. And why they are on repeat with many ladies.

    • @marjoriemartinez9973
      @marjoriemartinez9973 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      I did 7 months but i realized what was happening 😢so i left him

    • @mhal2
      @mhal2 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

      @Music We can only be 'strung along' for as long as we allow it 😅. Take that in. 😊

    • @DeLightSmile123
      @DeLightSmile123 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Naw Really!

    • @nicolesiemens8727
      @nicolesiemens8727 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @Musicisthelanguageoflove It's so hard, once you come to the reality that you were just strung along and used.
      BUT- here's the bright side. You now know the immediate signs of a player.
      You know what lovebombing looks like- and the sneaky little phrases players will say to make you THINK they are serious about you, like, "let's just take things slow..."
      That phrase, right there... IMMEDIATE red flag for me now. It's a sign of a man- who just wants to USE you physically- but wants absolutely NO emotional connection with you. He ONLY wants to, "take things slow"- so he can USE you physically, for as long as possible.

    • @mhal2
      @mhal2 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      @@nicolesiemens8727 Why did allow it? It's on us ladies to let go of any relationship that isn't serving us and also to do our own inner work! We can't change anyone else ... only ourselves 😃

  • @mariefricchione437
    @mariefricchione437 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +68

    NC is not the key but it’s important. List his bad points and read it everyday. List the ways he hurt you big and small. Read it everyday! That’s your closure. Pick a guy with very few dealbreakers for you.

    • @jzwalz51robin45
      @jzwalz51robin45 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      So true for HER behavior too!

    • @Cindeylyn
      @Cindeylyn 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @mariefricchione437 I did that recently! I present texts from July 4th to about August 24th or so of daily reminders of why I left, need to stay gone, what he did. It helps.

    • @travelchannel304
      @travelchannel304 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Guys don't close doors, "case they want access later. 😮 Don't tell HIM you need closure.

    • @nicolesiemens8727
      @nicolesiemens8727 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      @travelchannel304 exactly. And that's the problem- with the kind of man Brian is describing in this video. They INTENTIONALLY don't end ANY relationships- and, "want to be friends"- in order that you will still have SEX with them- but no emotional attachment.
      You have to go No Contact and never speak to them again once you realize you're dealing with a man like this. You don't need closure- you just need to move on. You'll never know how many women they've been with- so WHY would you sink anymore time into them?

  • @lisabell2134
    @lisabell2134 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +51

    A guy stringed me along for 8 months, pretending to have serious intentions but still never wanted to commit. I didn’t meet his family or friends. I felt like i always had to prove myself to be worthy. My self value went down alot during this period because i felt i wasn’t good enough. Now this guy has started to contact me again, wanting to “help” me with things but i feel like he only wants to get inside my pants again. 😂

    • @deefay396
      @deefay396 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@lisabell2134Sounds familiar. Face it, he wants to help himself only, not you. You are plenty Good Enough, he is Not. Don't give him the time of day. He is a Time waster, Just move on.

    • @mariefricchione437
      @mariefricchione437 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      Not worthy of you

    • @pettypattytheprincess3784
      @pettypattytheprincess3784 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      Block his ass!!!!! Act like he doesn’t exist

    • @lilmar1710
      @lilmar1710 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

      Don’t pay him no mind, they come back when they sense that you’re moving on, just to treat you worse than the last time

    • @elianad2083
      @elianad2083 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      The Guy I was with never introduced me to his "inner circle" (family and friends) either. He was 58. I am 62 and don't have much in the way of that myself. But I tried to introduce him to who I could and called him "my boyfriend" since that's what we were. He never introduced me to anyone important to him. He had a niece and her Mom he was close to. But I never met him. Then once his nieces son came over and he just said "Austin this is ..." but no label after that. I should have taken that as a red flag but didn't. Looking bad, it makes me angry as I can see now how much he was using me to keep his power on (his power was in my name) something about his ex-wife messing up things for him. He could have taken care of it but didn't. He kept everything a "secret" for example a sheriff here was "supposed" to be his uncle. But I went on "Truthfinders" and I saw no mention of that Sheriff being his Uncle. Every word that came out of his mouth was a lie and I put up with it for almost four years.

  • @sandrade6148
    @sandrade6148 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    This man is likely the best psychotherapist I have ever come across and I am one. He delivers in a relatable and understandable way.

  • @winkydinker8160
    @winkydinker8160 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    My husband told me this morning I could be replaced by 600 dollars a month. (I’m a stay at home mom to 2 small children). It made me feel extremely worthless. I have heard hurtful things for the last 7 years. This one stung worse, after all this time and dedication. I need to let go 😭

    • @AVitalLife
      @AVitalLife 23 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Oh man sorry to hear that. Sounds like you might be better off with the $600

  • @prettybird7597
    @prettybird7597 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +51

    I ended it after being strung along. I said I was letting him go, got stuff off my chest which was not so nice things and then went NC. I felt better the first month or two, then I felt worse. It’s true that grief is not linear. Thank you for your content. ❤

  • @LilyRay-u1z
    @LilyRay-u1z 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    Everything was fine until i found out he has feelings for my sis and he told me he still loves me and wants to keep our relationship, i didn't take that shit so I ended things, immediately he started pursuing my sis. I realized I was an option all along. He probably don't even know what love is, and I'm happy i didn't lose anything I'm at the right place with the right people, My Family 😊

  • @saradf
    @saradf 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +58

    It hurts when he was so sure about me, he did his best to be together despite distance then later on changed his mind about committing and turning into an avoidant, discarded our connection, rejects me and leaves. But i don’t hate him cauz i saw a wounded man,i did accept him with his complicated past.
    Now he made the decision for me that i should walk away. It’s his loss.. he’ll realise it one day.

    • @Slim.01x
      @Slim.01x 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      ain’t that the truth

    • @DuskDaimon
      @DuskDaimon 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

      Pretty much experienced the same situation 💔 It's especially hard when you empathize with his inner child and deep wounds, like despite how cruel and cold he became, you can understand why, and somehow love even the darkest parts of him. Hoping they grow in time, but now it's no longer our burden. Sending good vibes ❤

    • @saradf
      @saradf 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      @@DuskDaimon i feel you 💯🫶🏻 thank you for the support, i hope they’ll do the work and eventually realise what they missed. Meanwhile everything happens for a reason so let’s move on and heal quietly ✨

  • @Zqualityyt
    @Zqualityyt 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    They'll think about you when they're going through a break up themselves however by then we already moved on with our lives. It doesn't matter how strong the feelings are, they made their choice. It hurts but life has to go on

  • @PEM5861
    @PEM5861 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    I really needed to hear this. My mind knows this, my heart has to get on board. Thank you!

  • @suzanneholman1203
    @suzanneholman1203 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    Thanks, Brian. This is so practical and helpful. Truth hurts, but not as much as reliving rejection and incompatibility.

  • @pimpumpame3864
    @pimpumpame3864 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    See him for who he is. Thanks Brian! ❤

  • @colleenbenevedes566
    @colleenbenevedes566 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    Oh my gosh, you're hilarious and so right. Thanks for cheering us on.

  • @ab-kh4hm
    @ab-kh4hm 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    The future you part really helpful, thank you. And thanks a million for not adding pictures of people looking sadly out of windows.

  • @Cheekycupcake-d5j
    @Cheekycupcake-d5j 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

    Brian you hit the nail on the head, Hollywood is just a fantasy not real life but women tend to think relationships are like Hollywood, we need to wake up and move on, like a man does….i always remember the fuc--up stuff and never want to see or hear from them again

  • @elisabethdecesso5508
    @elisabethdecesso5508 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Thank you, Geert, although what you suggest is so very hard to do, really very hard. The mind knows you are right, but the heart screams in pain.

  • @divinadecosio
    @divinadecosio 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    I started writing a journal focused only on the relationship I wanted to end, so every time I thought it was a good idea to keep on it just read about the situation in my own words. It worked fine

    • @ktbiwk
      @ktbiwk 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      👏 👏 👏 👏 ❤

    • @WideAwakeSpiritually
      @WideAwakeSpiritually 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That’s a really good idea

    • @iiislandbreeze
      @iiislandbreeze 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Works better than anything

  • @xkayla5x
    @xkayla5x 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +34

    So tough when you see them at work everyday.

    • @angllnbzn
      @angllnbzn 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      Same! How do you deal with this on a daily basis?

    • @mimosa27
      @mimosa27 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      This is exactly my situation - which is why I was fortunate to be able to resign and start a new job elsewhere. It's been 6 months of zero contact, but I'm still crying over having fallen in love so deeply (nothing happened between us, but he did let me know that he also had feelings for me. However, I had to completely let it go). I empathize with your situation and how incredibly stressful it is. I had to take daily Tylenol to numb the acute vulnerability and stress

    • @ester_22
      @ester_22 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      I had same situation and left the job!! First time happened to me to fall in love so deeply with someone at work. Hated myself for being so vulnerable and weak 😢 I miss him terribly, though, and have not gotten over him. It's 6 months now that I left the job...loved the job but couldn't focus and work together.

    • @lilmar1710
      @lilmar1710 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Same situation with me and I can’t leave my job at this moment 😢

    • @mimosa27
      @mimosa27 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      @@lilmar1710 It must be so painful and stressful. I've been there

  • @dianagentile7636
    @dianagentile7636 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Oh Brian Ur
    Hilarious😂😂😂
    DELETE DELETE DELETE 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️
    “The Titanic”
    Went NC 4 years ago, best thing I ever could have done for
    “MY PEACE” ❤️
    Thank You &
    Take Care Always ❤️💕❤️

  • @17h127
    @17h127 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

    I just acknowledge feelings are illogical and I value logic. I let logic dictate my decisions. Eventually my feelings come around. I've never gone no contact. Still good friends with some of my ex's and most of my crushes. Of course mourning the loss of the future I thought was to pass hurts. Cry it out, accept it, and embrace the idea there's something better for both of us to come.

    • @judithj446
      @judithj446 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      You hit it on the nose for me. Thank you.

  • @imsonecka
    @imsonecka 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    istg i love the way you talk the most. you are so funny and you tell the truths just in the right way. the best video i've ever watched on breakups so far. thank you so much!!

  • @gret9815
    @gret9815 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +36

    This break up is hurting so much 😔
    Can you do more videos about this topic? It is so helpful.

    • @invisibleme5
      @invisibleme5 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      Hang in there! A broken heart is like a broken bone. It takes time to heal. 💔❤️

    • @gret9815
      @gret9815 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      It’s already been 2 months and it’s still painful in the same way.

    • @asialoveee04
      @asialoveee04 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@gret9815 Trust me it gets better with time. I went through a breakup after 10 years. I thought I would never get over him. 10 years later.. I don’t remember the feelings I had for that person. Best lesson is that you will look back and be glad you didn’t go back. Be strong and know that you will be fine. You’re beautiful and you deserve to be happy. Stay strong !

    • @feebsfilms
      @feebsfilms 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      It hurts so much, but get moving with your own life, get his breakup course. Look through his old videos and listen listen listen, he's done so much that will help you. Hang in there, better days are ahead!!

    • @gret9815
      @gret9815 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ⁠thank you🥺

  • @pollinenanjalla9370
    @pollinenanjalla9370 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Crossed this channel today,the best channel I have come across,I am watching back to back,thank you Brian,you are the best.

  • @rudok8700
    @rudok8700 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    Thank you Brian for such a good video.
    I still don't understand why men make women go through all these things.
    Relationships shouldn't be as complicated. However, we are living in a world where most relationships are one sided and in most cases , women love and give the most.
    It's so heartbreaking...😢

    • @csmith8503
      @csmith8503 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      And I don't understand why women make men go through these things.
      This is a truly great video, I would love to find an AI to flip the genders on all of his words because this is exactly what I am struggling with now. I am a (naïve) 70 year old, long married, widower, and she is 71 with a lifelong history of failed dysfunctional relationships, and she taught me some very valuable and extremely painful lessons, but I foolishly, over the course of a year let myself fall in love. Eventually I came to realize that while I wanted a long-term stable loving relationship, she only ever wanted an on-call escort, as in "easy, with no effort" required. Ironically, if I could have had, or learn to have, that same shallow, superficial desire, everything would be hunky-dory.

    • @nikkolyn1122
      @nikkolyn1122 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@csmith8503❤❤❤

    • @elianad2083
      @elianad2083 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Because we let them.. thinking that yea..we are finally in a relationship..with a man who loves us and can complete us and make us whole. But it's not true. We are already complete and whole without a man. I'm 62 and yet another failed relationship. I think I have had enough. I often wonder if people are meant to mate for life because of such a high divorce rate.

  • @hesmirnagermosenpena9455
    @hesmirnagermosenpena9455 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    I'm going thru this righ now 😢 hopefully I forget him soon!! Even i have no contact with him!! Thanks for posting!❤

  • @asialoveee04
    @asialoveee04 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Brian your personality is beautiful. I’m happy that I found your page❤

  • @marsamarsa7769
    @marsamarsa7769 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    A severe no contact. Correct.

  • @mariatrining4083
    @mariatrining4083 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +26

    12:26 let go of the ex and just move on. So true!

  • @emmalove135
    @emmalove135 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    There is someone I watch who does “ Skits” wherein he plays different characters, and one, the female uses a “ Remote Control “ . CUTE !!!
    I like your concept of the “ Delete Button “ and I agree with all that you have said.
    I will have to reinforce these words of yours by listening to this video again at another time.
    I was going to say something else but I have somehow forgotten it ; probably just like he had apparently “ forgotten “ me which made me recall that he had once said to someone “ I gotta get something out of it...” You are absolutely correct in saying that if we pay close attention to the things that they say, which is difficult to do when one is wrapped up in the moment; however, upon close reflection of the words they do speak to others conveys volumes that we somehow overlooked through the Rose colored , heart shaped glasses that we missed before.
    I recently found myself asking myself,” Why did he not agree to meeting with me when that’s all that I asked for from him ? He passed up a chance to meet me and get to know me and allow me to be able to know him. So, I suppose he spoke the truth to me when he said that he was “ No good.” I thought at first that he was putting himself down verbally so I said,” Well , if you are No Good , I am Too Good. I have to feel good about myself and have a high sense of self esteem ( especially since the last relationship I was in I was disrespected and abused.) You’re right about not hating the other individual, it’s his loss not mine. Why couldn’t he see what the “ Fakers” see who respond to me via his channel? Unless they all have the same “ scheme in mind “ to get something out of it. Which tells me They really are “ NO GOOD “ .
    Thank you for helping me clear away the nebulous cloud of confusion that I have somehow deluded myself into thinking. ( It hasn’t been a total waste of time as I have focused on my education and my children. Now, I am learning “ How to Focus on Myself. “ )
    👍👍🙏💜🦁✨✝️
    12:25

  • @chiaraA.
    @chiaraA. 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

    Women all over the world are getting the message that our assumptions that (most) men (especially the ones we chose to date) are worthwhile dating material, is just flat out wrong. We're becoming versed in emotional intelligence.... we see how the the dating culture has made us primed to blame ourselves (!!!) for men who are just so-so, subpar and even worse - and we should have passed on most of them after just a 'Hello'. Instead, we learned we should do more, be more, and quite frankly if we are completely focused upon what we need to do or feel we should be doing, rather than focused on the man and his behavior vis-a-vis us, and what HE is all about - if that is happening in the context of dating that person, well it's time to say goodbye, because if you are thinking it's all on you as to how the relationship goes, then you are dating someone who doesn't care all that much. Women get caught up in the trap of taking the relationship SO seriously - even after it ended. You will often read women say, 'it still hurts' and 'this breakup is killing me' etc etc. Ladies, he's not all that. Open your eyes - you didn't lose anything that was worth more than junk jewelry, I promise you. You certainly didn't lose anything that was meant for you, which also means it wasn't anything that was worthwhile - not worthwhile for you. And since it wasn't meant for you, take license and just call it for what it is - junk. You owe it to yourself to give yourself more respect and as for that other person, you need to see them with clarity and someone treating you poorly is NOT an amazing person.

    • @csmith8503
      @csmith8503 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      I hope to one day meet one of these women that you are describing, that take the relationship seriously, instead of just a fun game to play. Major lesson: ignore her words if her behavior is showing something different.

    • @lemostjoyousrenegade
      @lemostjoyousrenegade 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      🎯‼️ Whomp! THERE IT IS! The truth, the WHOLE truth , and NOTHING BUT the truth! 💯%!
      🔥♥️🔥♥️🔥♥️🔥♥️🔥 ♥️🫡
      😘 🌹 🤗

    • @Deb-w5r
      @Deb-w5r หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @chiaraA, the realisation that you have given too much single handedly to make the relationship work should be the wake up call. Yes, I think you are spot on when you say that some women are 'primed' to become the caretaker in the relationship dynamic. Equal reciprocity and care is the respectful and kind way to conduct a relationship and sadly emotionally avoidant people are simply not able to do that and nothing you can do (solo) can fix that. ACCEPT the reality of this situation and leave it alone, or choose to live in the continuous cycle of on and off again.

    • @chiaraA.
      @chiaraA. หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@Deb-w5r With the internet and the exchange of information we are learning so much that otherwise would have kept an individual in the dark and cause them to think, "It's my fault." For me it was one and done - and I credit the internet and the research I was able to do and see the entire community around these issues - it was not hard to un-choose that person, it was immediate - but the aftermath was very tough to process

  • @MonicaContreras-xs6sr
    @MonicaContreras-xs6sr 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Brian, you REALLY have a way of lazer stamping into (my) ppl’s minds with your A#1 Analogies!…The “sitting on a train” was Priceless & im going to remember that 1 as
    it’s SO easy to imagine myself just sitting there & open to someone who quite possibly could be kind & interesting & might plop down right next to me!…& the other I’d already envisioned of “bettering myself” post “ding-dong” & when we run into ea other again, his mouth will simply drop…Don’t forget that Very Last & Best Part!….Thanks for “being” as you’re IMMENSELY HELPFUL….& I sense Very Kind & your Sage Knowledge & Advice is coming from a Really-good place…God Bless, Hermano💃🏻

  • @asurya8797
    @asurya8797 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +33

    OMG just what I needed

  • @instagamrr
    @instagamrr 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

    Such a good video! Not what if, what is!

  • @thepatientone777
    @thepatientone777 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you so much, sir. It feels like you’ve infiltrated my thoughts 😂 Your kind, warm spirit made this message so easy to accept 😌🙏🏾💗

  • @francesdonald969
    @francesdonald969 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    You speak French and Flemish? Cool!
    So... Informative, valuable content with great humor and a light touch - while also a linguist 🥰 Thank you. I find your content soothing, helpful and entertaining (a great mix). All the best from BC Canada.

  • @amandadewet4022
    @amandadewet4022 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +61

    Give your heart to Jesus Christ. He will lead and guide you into your future. He completely loves you and will never leave you.❤🎉

    • @-55512
      @-55512 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      oh for petes sake

    • @LaurensLifePhotoJournal
      @LaurensLifePhotoJournal 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Amen!! The truth that all this pain led me to. Praise God!!

  • @melanieconklin6550
    @melanieconklin6550 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Truly Divine!! Thank you, Brian❤

  • @charilynn6647
    @charilynn6647 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Brian, are the friend in my head. Why should I pay attention to someone who disrespected me? I end things for very valid reasons.

  • @izdark8733
    @izdark8733 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

    Just in time , went no contact with him today

    • @caroliner2029
      @caroliner2029 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I'm Day 12 today.
      May the Lord God wrap His arms of love and comfort around you and fill you with His peace.
      (I'd have gone mad without His comfort and love).

  • @DLee756
    @DLee756 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I VERY MUCH need this RIGHT NOW. I re-watched now, & I watched when first released.😊❤️
    Thank you, Brian.❤️😊

  • @randiedgar4659
    @randiedgar4659 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I love the way you explain things. You're the only one that makes me feel better.

  • @Sudakshina_Kina
    @Sudakshina_Kina 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thanks Brian...this is very witty and insightful!

  • @Jaii_Park
    @Jaii_Park 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Hi 👋 Brian, this is my first time watching your videos, and I am SO THANKFUL for all that you said. 🙏🏽 ❤ I needed that.

  • @susane945
    @susane945 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I like your analogy about needing to read the very exciting book to the End!! Love you Hiirt!! You make total sense as always, PLUS you have a great SOH!! ❤🎉😊

  • @asahdo
    @asahdo 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I haven’t slept in three days. I can’t eat. I can’t study. I just want it to stop, I just want it to go back to how it was when we were together and I was happy.

    • @nirvana6452
      @nirvana6452 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Sending you a lot of love warm hugs and prayers ❤️

  • @oneminuteinthelifeofcaro2642
    @oneminuteinthelifeofcaro2642 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    This is excellent advice. I like that you suggest doing something positive for one’s self. Also thinking of our older self is great, I have done that and it puts things into perspective. No contact is very helpful. And thinking of the reasons why the ex broke it off also helps a lot. One of your best videos. I have bought your books 😊 Thank you!

  • @victoriagold4782
    @victoriagold4782 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Thank you Brian. After years of sufferings I realize the very good feeling that I do not love him at all anymore. All my feelings like love and hate were dissapeared for him. It is gone👍😊
    Now I am completely free from him.

  • @k-llove3336
    @k-llove3336 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You rock! Such clear reframes on behaviors that have tripped me up. Grateful!! ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @evelyneitabo7608
    @evelyneitabo7608 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I just needed to hear this, thank you.i just suffered a heartbeat this week and it has been hard moving on...thank you Brian

  • @AfiDeSouza-qf6nf
    @AfiDeSouza-qf6nf 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    I dont waste time with a man Who Is not showing any interest.😊

  • @Selin-mo1bv
    @Selin-mo1bv 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    This is so timely! I am around a place where my ex and I traveled so I had nostalgia. Something in me told me to check TH-cam and I came across your video. Thank you for your brotherly instruction!

  • @manjurybhattacharya5725
    @manjurybhattacharya5725 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    This was needed for me right now

  • @negarrahimzade7315
    @negarrahimzade7315 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you Brian I love every word you say and the light you bring to our lives ❤

  • @MonicaContreras-xs6sr
    @MonicaContreras-xs6sr 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I am having a hard time though on the 1-about “not hating him”….Moments when I can let grace in my heart, it feels good but then I say to myself: “But he’s SUCH a rat stinker & how he treated me” & I HAVE TO HATE him again as THAT feels so right to me! But I’m
    trying as you’re right, how Delightful to just not feel anythg for him at all BECAUSE he doesn’t deserve 1 more second of my time & I’ve been able to “Slay the Beast” of him …Got it & I’ll try to stay the course!!☘️

  • @okworld.____2187
    @okworld.____2187 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Your humor is so good along w these beautiful tips thank you❤

  • @karenpuopolo6965
    @karenpuopolo6965 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Great video Brian I have good days and bad days I loved someone 13 years for someone that use me and didn't care about me and weirdly enough we weren't in a relationship. It's taken me years but slowly and surely I'm moving on and it wasn't possible for me because I have unconditional love no matter what he did to me I always loved him. Once I started to care about me and realized my potential that I deserve love... moving on happened a little bit over time

  • @amelittaberretta9109
    @amelittaberretta9109 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    Exactly. I Long for peace. The peace of God. - My imagination worked overtime over a situation which never had a future. A mistake of my mind for which I paid an enormous emotional ,psychological and material price.

    • @TheCakediva08
      @TheCakediva08 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Wow me too. This is deep

    • @artistchristos
      @artistchristos 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      The only husband for me is Jesus Christ. ✝️💟

  • @DS40764
    @DS40764 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Yes, it's usually about us and our mind(what it needs) and not about really wanting them. But sometimes you cannot go completey no contact because that person is a small part of your life. So it is painful.

  • @RoxyVanessa
    @RoxyVanessa 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Brian I’m so happy I found your TH-cam 🙏🏽

  • @Radtech2002
    @Radtech2002 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    Great content Brian.
    You’re the Best!

  • @ellenmykkanen3865
    @ellenmykkanen3865 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This is exactly what I needed to hear today

  • @nadijones660
    @nadijones660 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I love this. It's so funny and spot on! Well done Brian, this is awesome 😂😂😂❤❤

  • @traceybyrne1690
    @traceybyrne1690 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Brian you are an amazing descriptive support to us women ❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @nathaliegrise8372
    @nathaliegrise8372 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you! This is exactly what I needed to hear today

  • @DarKNess1111x
    @DarKNess1111x 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you for this advice. I'm grateful to have come across this video because one bite of wisdom you shared herein made me realize that even seeking out and digesting such content has been keeping that emotional tether in place and misplacing my time and energy towards anything even adjacent to him, when I should be using it to watch content that will help expand a skill set or soothe me in a healthy way or just make me laugh. Too much of myself and my time was wasted pouring into a person who has demonstrated their disinterested in, if not incapacity to, do anything other than take, deplete and do harm all while playing victim. I'm done and while this info has been beyond valuable and I've been working to sever this tie for a full gestation period at this point, I'm ready to put the final nail in the coffin and lay my facades about that person to rest once and for all. Silver lining I've met an actual good guy and if not for enduring that agonizing ordeal, I may never have learned the difference

  • @hain7
    @hain7 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    i currently do not have means to move out on my own. Also, 2 children in homeschool. The man i married definitely benegits from my cleaning, cooking, stuff i buy. i was thinking the other day, why does he seem to be rewarded and i punished. I just feel used again... and stuck.

  • @Fetesblock
    @Fetesblock 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I’ve watched a lot of your videos but this one hit the spot so much! It was exactly what I needed to hear from start to finish.

  • @rajibarakat2049
    @rajibarakat2049 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you so so much!
    I really love your videos, and the way you speak is really comforting

  • @DLee756
    @DLee756 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for the video, Brian. 😊❤️

  • @teralecole316
    @teralecole316 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This is one of the best 3 advice.

  • @angelaschnettler5013
    @angelaschnettler5013 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This is so very true, all of it ... thank you (and you always make me smile 😊) !

  • @kristentiveron4756
    @kristentiveron4756 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I’ve been watching you for a few months. Thank you. You’ve taught me many things

  • @simonesommer8895
    @simonesommer8895 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Thanks for giving true, honest, direct, heartfelt, grounding advise! ❤❤❤ so practical and helpful! Hugs and Love!

  • @carolinesposto
    @carolinesposto 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Your videos are always fun, and I have read several of your books. Thanks for all you do!

  • @ronniephilip1680
    @ronniephilip1680 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Hi Brian,
    I don't know you , but i have to say you are hilarious and I love you for that reason, I love anyone that makes me laugh, brilliant and funny.Thanks for the advice and laughter.

  • @jerilynnschisser516
    @jerilynnschisser516 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks Brian, your videos are super helpful!

  • @juliavisky
    @juliavisky 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you, Brian, this is so helpful! 🙂 Although there is one point in which I have a different experience. I have always convinced the guy who broke up with me to have a final discussion. And it was always a blessing! The last such case was three weeks ago. I feel much more released and with my self esteem in place since I had this closing discussion with him. 😊 God bless him with a great other woman and me with a great other man! 😃

  • @vylia
    @vylia 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Great advice. Not my case now, but I'm always learning a lot from your videos. Thanks, Brian!

  • @abracadabra3089
    @abracadabra3089 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I 💖 love love 💖 this guy 😁 and his analogies are not just fantastic, but hilarious!! 🤣🤣🤣 Kudos to you Brian!!! 👍👍😁💪💪💪🎉🎉🎉

  • @simon15jims50
    @simon15jims50 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thankyou Brian! You are amazing!😊

  • @QueenJessica-z5j
    @QueenJessica-z5j 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This compelling video brings back terrible memories of my recent breakup after four years of dating. My dearest friend made the decision to go, and I was left with an inexhaustible hurt. I can't even begin to imagine my life without him, much as I keep trying to make amends. I'm frustrated. I want to write about how much I miss him here because I can't seem to get him out of my head.

    • @iiislandbreeze
      @iiislandbreeze 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm wishing you healing and comfort

  • @joannedomingo2398
    @joannedomingo2398 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I needed to hear this. Thank you ❤🥹

  • @AbiBrown-q9k
    @AbiBrown-q9k 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    in my case you are sir, *my little brother* love your sense of humour, and advise- thanks

  • @ris9553
    @ris9553 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I had a guy string me along for years.
    Was told that he loved me and wanted to be with me. Then all i got was a text 'nite' and never heard from him again.
    Hes back with his gf, has a daughter and his business is going so well.
    I see him and her, and i cant help but feel worthless as i was so easy to let go. He drove past me the other day slowly and looked at me.
    I dont know how to deal with this and everything seeming to be rainbows and unicorns for them.

  • @daljitvirdi1024
    @daljitvirdi1024 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Hi Brian it's been a while since I watched your videos. This video popped up in my TH-cam feed so I felt guided towards it. Thank you this is helpful for me 😊😇💖🙏.