For questions to be answered in the comments, please give a "super thanks" or head over to my website & ask there. 𝕊𝕜𝕚𝕝𝕝 𝕆𝕗 𝔸𝕥𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 Men's Advice Community: soa.fm Private relationship/dating coaching: soa.fm/dating-relationship-coaching/ Questions or feedback: soa.fm/contact/ ✔ SOA APPROVED COACHING PROGRAMS 𝗙𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘀 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗕𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗳𝗶𝘁𝘀 How To Get A Sex Buddy: bit.ly/3Mitohu 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗰𝗿𝗮𝗺𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗿 Turn a Girl Friend into a Girlfriend: bit.ly/3Kf9EJt 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗮𝗼 𝗢𝗳 𝗕𝗮𝗱𝗮𝘀𝘀 How To Attract ANY Woman: bit.ly/35Jyx0W 𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝘅 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 Get The Sex Life You Deserve: bit.ly/3K9bI5V
If she doesn't make you a priority just dump her. If she barely wants to see you she is either interested in someone else or she is making her self available to run into someone else. Men need to have higher standards and not let women treat them like a second class citizen. You're best bet is to kick this girl to the curb, if she has any sort of attraction left she will come crawling back, if not then you just saved yourself a bunch of time and effort.
At first I was going to say that dumping her isn't necessary, but now that you mention it...I did a video about a similar situation: th-cam.com/video/rIDJDFQc32Q/w-d-xo.html
I can relate too much to this man, you know what I'm talking about. It's always good to come as many times as possible to analyze my mistakes to get better. To anyone watching this and going through a similar situatio; what he says is true, backing off is the best thing to do even if it hurts for a bit, but will definitely turn things in your favour.
She'll be on your mind for a while. In fact, you'll probably be thinking about her until you meet a woman who is equal or greater value to your ex & that can take a while. But staying busy, being productive & meeting/dating new women will help significantly.
This was the video that finally made me delete my Ex's number because I realise that I was always the price and that I was the one who created that image of her in my head and hence, I can undo it. Thank you coach!
Yes, usually we create a fantasy of her in our head & when she doesn't live up to it, we get angry & try to force her into that role. This just causes all kinds of problems & it'll eventually cause her to push you away & lose attraction. It's important that you not only see yourself as the prize, but you accept her for who she is...then decide if you can live with who she is, or not. Generally, most men's issue with women when it comes to an LTR is they don't want to accept who she is....in turn they become needy, whiny, over emotional, etc ultimately turning her off. It's that same fantasy of her that makes it so difficult to get over her & move on.
so 2 months ago i had a relationship it started well and then in the next couple of weeks my relationship became very on and off and i kept on demanding what she had to do so eventually after 2 months we broke up. I heard she wanted to end the relationship so i cut her off before she even tried to talk. a couple days after that she came back to me and said that she wanted me back and so becuase i still love her i accepted it. now it has been around 2 weeks and this week has been abit draining because she is somewhat doing the same thing. she is definitely better than before and our relationship looks better for the most part but yeah she is kinda not really looking for me.. i know shes tired im also tired of the tasks that we have but the difference is.. is that i look forward to meeting her when im tired because i find being with her is relaxing. but, she on the other hand finds me as another task she has to do..
When she disrespects you, you need to make her work for your attention again. Make her jump through more hoops so that she actually values your relationship
Need help. There is a shy & inexperienced girl who likes me. We live in same colony, we never talked to each other. We hardly make an eye contact, but her all body language suggest that she likes me. One day she came out from her comfort zone ( before that she used to nervous & vulnerable around me) stood far away from me stare at me, smile at me for sec. Next day she knew I am there she star giggling and laughing with her school frieds while staring at me secretly. But suddenly next day she started ingnorong me harshly, make concerted efforts to avoid me. Maybe she realised that i also like her. I am totally confused, don't know what to do, she doesn't even acknowledge my existence.
I don't know what that means, but you will never know for sure unless you talk to her. Approach her & introduce yourself. If she likes you, she is waiting for you to approach her. So, introduce yourself, flirt a little & get her out on a date.
She sees me & then stops as I'm speaking to a friend & then stares at me for 2 to 3 seconds after 1 year after I moved On? Why? After her disrespecting me, I walked away immediately losing interest.
I set a date with My committed girlfriend of 7 months. after 30 minutes together she said that she needs to go home to feed her daughter. I walked away because of that behavior. Is it the right thing I did. And what if she wants to reach me sooner after I walked away? Shall I teach her not to do that again?
I don't have enough context to answer that. I'm starting to think that you're just posting random scenarios in here & seeing how I answer....everyday there's a brand new scenario. Watch the videos, read the books I recommend. You have to understand the material so you know what to do when I'm not around.
Im in a situation of having a problem for my self confidence probably depress.it all started during the quarantine, i became a silent person and always think of i cant do this, and that thing,So i started to stay at my comfort zone and still struggling to break this habit. im 24 yrs old and just graduated from college this 2021 ( i should have graduated in 2019 but pandemic hits) no experience of work, but im still finding a job, got rejected 3 times , im currently unemployed and i have a 2 and half years of relationship to my first girlfriend, shes doing fine, currently working and helping her parents, she believe in me that i can work this out but times past and she is starting to control me like use this word “ how long should i wait for you to find a work” and she knows that im trying, she always wanted a vacation but i know will cost a lot so i told her that i can’t because of a money problem,and now i think she is using my problem to be the dominant one in our relationship. What should i do to get that respect that she has at the very start of our relationship?
Yes, if you continue down this road she will eventually lose respect & ultimately attraction. I've lost a couple of women whom I loved due to lack of money. They'll tolerate it for a while, but if it goes on too long they'll leave. I'm not trying to scare you...just giving you the facts. For the job, you just have to keep trying...don't give up. It's counterintuitive, but the more that you worry about it, the less likely chance of actually succeeding. Find a temporary job in the meantime. When I first started this business I was walking & boarding dogs, & delivering food (I HATED this!) while I worked to build this business. My last business ended up failing & I was out of money. Sometimes we have to do things we don't like until we can reach our goals. In terms of building your confidence again, you have to step outside your comfort zone & push yourself. It'll be uncomfortable & maybe even a little scary at first, but if you keep pushing yourself your confidence will grow. So, go be social, try new things, & push yourself...even when you don't feel like it.
@@SkillofAttraction i don’t even care if she leave me because of how unconfident i am right now, but i do wish she stay,the day i finally put myself back. I find your reply very helpful the way you interact to your subscriber’s really help others like me in this situation, relationship or building self confidence, thank you very much!!
@@blipblipblip4892 You'll regret it if you give up just because it's difficult right now. Everything will eventually get better, but you have to participate in your own rescue. No one is going to do it for you.
Coach, I'm not feeling so good. My girl flaked on me again. The first time, I thought it was a misunderstanding. This time she says she had to work, but she didn't text me for 6 hours and said she couldn't text. I waited and waited and had to drive back home in the rain all alone. I don't know what to do. If I complain, it makes me look desperate. But if I go ghost mode, then it might make it look like I'm too afraid to step up to her. She will text me at 2 am and want to talk about her deceased dog, but this doesn't feel good anymore. She wastes hours of my time and always has an excuse, but she wants me to comfort her at 2 am. Again, I feel stuck. Cuz if I communicate or don't communicate, it's not a good spot for me. Should I ghost her for a week to regain leverage? I can't believe how much my life is being affected right now. I wasn't expecting her to flake again.
Yea, that doesn't sound good! If it's done more than once, then I'd end it. She had no good excuse & what she did was completely disrespectful. Honestly, if you tolerate this the chances are quite high that she'll do it again...or do something even more disrespectful. Tolerating those little acts of disrespect turn into her demonstrating bigger acts of disrespect. So, don't complain, don't ghost...just tell her something like, "this isn't working for me. What you did was completely disrespectful & it's not going to happen again. I wish you well!" And if she wants you back, let her earn it. This means that she has to come to you for the first few dates, don't spend a lot of money on her...let her express her apology through her actions. A simple verbal apology isn't enough. Someone once said, "'I'm sorry' is just something people say so they can get permission to not feel bad about they did." Action speaks louder than words. You may also want to check out this video about being strung along: th-cam.com/video/KDt7GVMoY7k/w-d-xo.html
@@SkillofAttraction man.. I texted her just that and she always has an excuse. Now she’s saying that she did text me but the WiFi is bad at her work. Had a story. How do I judge the situation? This has become some kind of pattern. It’s always something unbelievable.
@@JoeBudd-D I've been through something like this...there was always an excuse, but nothing changed. I learned that if she really cared as much as she said she did, there wouldn't have been excuses...she would've rectified the situation, because she knew it was pushing me away. In hindsight, I wish would've pulled the plug MUCH earlier & not let it all spin out of control to the point where I was no longer feeling love for her, but resentment...& angry at myself for putting up with it for so long. The problem here, besides the obvious, is that you WANT to believe her...you WANT this to work, but the reality is that it's not working & she's just making excuses for herself. She will never, NEVER take responsibility for her actions. Continually telling her where she's going wrong & not doing anything about it is only causing her to slowly lose respect for you. Deep down she knows that she's wrong...& she knows that you shouldn't be tolerating it. So, I would stand your ground & tell her that you've had it with her flaking & her excuses, & that if she decides that she wants to do this right, she's welcome to get in touch, but you're moving on. I know it's hard...walking away from someone who you love is one of the most difficult things you'll ever have to do, but what's worse is continuing to go through this for many more months, or years, & it never getting better...most likely it getting worse. And you being angry with yourself for not getting out when you know that you should have.
@@SkillofAttraction This is good advice. I used to think that it was just no contact, no contact. But in my case, do I tell her that an apology would be necessary? Could I say that sometimes it’s not our fault like you say you had no WiFi but that an apology would be necessary for my time i spent to drive and get ready? Is it manly to ask for an apology or is that needy?
I have watched and learned a lot about attraction from you and other TH-cam channel but I am not applying it to get girls. I am 25 years old from Nepal and my financial condition is not very good(i don't have job) ... I am thinking about first improve my finances then start dating but I am feeling like if I waited too long to start dating then young girls won't be interested in dating me after few more years when I will become 28 -30 years old and I won't get good girls to get married(my families are also looking for girls for me but I think if I get Married now I won't be able to focus on my goals) . What to do this situation?
You can do both (try improving your dating life while managing your financials). 25 is still so young. You shouldn't worry too much about your age right now unless let's say your 40 or maybe even 50. I would at least try to get some girls maybe even one night stands to improve
You have the right idea in mind; however, I recommend that you do both! Putting your love/sex life on hold isn't a good idea, because when you're ready you're going to be inexperienced with girls. It's always a good idea to keep practicing, whether that be some girl you're casually dating or a girlfriend (or even your wife). You always want to be practicing flirting, seducing, gaming girls...it'll pay off in the long term.
@Diabetes - Yes, 25 is still pretty young! Plus, young men will never have a time in their life again where there are so many young, single women within reach. After 30, the dating pool thins considerably & it continues to thin the older you get. It's a good time to take advantage of the situation!
@@SkillofAttraction What do you think is the right age ,time and situation for me to start thinking about getting married and having kids? Because I don't want to miss out on marriage opportunities at the same time I don't want to get married too soon ....because I want to focus on my goals and don't want to be distracted by Marriage obligations. I fear if I waited to long to start thinking about marriage I will miss out on some great opportunities.
On a side note, i'm really confused about something that happened to me today. So i went to a party and approached a group of spanish girls (4 girls approx), and started talking to them, one of them asked for my insta immediately, I figured she was very attracted/interested in me, and I confirmed it when after a bit of flirting we started making out really wild, she couldn't get off me and we spent some time together at the party. She left for a bit and told me she had to go but was gonna do somethign first, so i said bet. MInutes later her friend finds me and tells me the girl was looking for me but eventually left. So i texted her where she was and after small talk i asked he to hangout sometime, she said "yea sometime", and when i asked her when is she free, she said the classic "i'll let you know" so i said alright, and i got left on seen. All this happened today in the same night. What the hell happened lol
Most likely she was either testing you, or you were just someone fun in the moment & she has no interest in pursuing. For future reference, it's best to not try to setup a date the same night you meet her. You want the mystery & tension build a bit before getting her out on a date. So, what I recommend that you do is wait several days & try again. Don't contact her during that time. If she reaches out before that time, then that's a really good sign that she has high interest...but if she doesn't, it doesn't necessarily mean that she's not interested.
@@SkillofAttraction that's what i thought, that it could've been a "one night thing" or that she might be testing me right now. What's funny is that i did the same with another girl which was almost the same situation, only that this other is not replying. So once I reach out after a week or so, how should I interact, should I do small talk and tell her that I'd love to see her or something like that?
@@yakdrago999 Yes, after about a week reach out to her with the only intention of having fun with her & ultimately getting her out on a date. If you want her, don't waste your time talking to her all hours of the night...save that stuff for in person meet up. be fun, playful, upbeat & get her out on a date.
Same could use help been almost 2 years but she's in schoo and bout finish and she has a kid. Also but seems like I'm low priority went from seeing her everyday but now she bout graduate. Seems like she spends time with school and her friends
@@SkillofAttraction yeah.. The proper way... Cause I've come to notice that it's really easy to do it the wrong way... Like being too cold or too diss... I know there's supposed to be a sort of balance but I'm not even sure the degree
@@bryanwolf5468 If she's pulling away, the best way to do it is by mirroring her level of effort & enthusiasm that she's currently investing in you (which is always subject to change). This way you're not doing too little or too much. However, if you're pulling away to get the attraction back up, or she's jerking you around, then it's best to slowly pull away. Suddenly pulling away without any clear reason (in her mind) can easily cause her to think you're playing games & she start playing games right back, which you absolutely don't want. So, as an example, if you typically contact her daily, this week only initiate contact 5-6 days a week, then the following week 4-5 days...& so on until she begins to chase you again. But overall, don't pull away just to get an reaction out of her...you want to turn your focus to productivity, goals, & hobbies. The idea is to take her off the pedestal & start putting your purpose & lifestyle ahead of her. You still want to be sure to make time for her, but if you feel that you have to pull away, then you probably are placing too much importance on her, or spending too much time together. But, I don't know your situation.
@@SkillofAttraction but that's the thing... I'm not.. I'm not doing any of that.. I've learnt from this channel and other channels with my past relationships... I made all the mistakes... Over calling... Over texting... Taking disrespect.. Being needy... Over complimenting.. I did all that but with this particular girl I try keeping my game really tight... It's so tight she's confessed to me on multiple occasions that she loves me.. I've never said it back cause I explained I'm not sure yet... She was upset but eventually she got okay with it and things have been smooth but ever since the beginning of this week everything has just been kinda off... She's not texting the way she use to.. It's like she's less enthusiastic... She takes her sweet time replying texts and today she called me, and at some point while we were talking she brings up her area, cause we've been in a long distance relationship.. We were supposed to meet for the first time next week and before now she's been excited about us meeting but she calls me today and tells me how it's not safe... Her place is kinda dangerous and she doesn't want me going back home alone by myself... Before I could question what brought this up she said she had to go do something and that she'd call me... As I write this message that was 2 hours ago and she hasn't called me back but she's been going in and out of whatsapp... Like it's driving me crazy.. I'm trying to maintain my masculine frame by not responding to this but wtfff.. It's just so annoying and I just want to ask her what the hell is going on but I'm trying to keep my shit together
Hey Erick , quick question . Women don’t love us the same way we love them , but when women are single they’re miserable , also I notice that once they invest their emotions into a male is very hard for them to cheat . Compared to us , we can love a women unconditionally but still cheat on them
how can i make her be the one whos giving all the love or atleast a 50/50? should i just cared about her like shes just my friend? so i shouldnt be too much about giving my love but i also shouldnt be too careless? or should i be so uncaring? or what? what should i do to get a relationship where she is the one whos doing most of the work like when she actually wanted me before we dated
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Best option is walk a way and mean it, focus to your goals, mission and purposes in life
Yup! That's more or less what I suggested...
@@SkillofAttraction Thanks Coach
If she doesn't make you a priority just dump her. If she barely wants to see you she is either interested in someone else or she is making her self available to run into someone else. Men need to have higher standards and not let women treat them like a second class citizen. You're best bet is to kick this girl to the curb, if she has any sort of attraction left she will come crawling back, if not then you just saved yourself a bunch of time and effort.
At first I was going to say that dumping her isn't necessary, but now that you mention it...I did a video about a similar situation: th-cam.com/video/rIDJDFQc32Q/w-d-xo.html
I can relate too much to this man, you know what I'm talking about. It's always good to come as many times as possible to analyze my mistakes to get better. To anyone watching this and going through a similar situatio; what he says is true, backing off is the best thing to do even if it hurts for a bit, but will definitely turn things in your favour.
Yes, it's difficult & it can certainly hurt, but it's your best strategy...you must communicate to her that you have a high self worth.
I keep busy work more gym more still on my mind all the time it sucks. But i know i need to move on.
She'll be on your mind for a while. In fact, you'll probably be thinking about her until you meet a woman who is equal or greater value to your ex & that can take a while. But staying busy, being productive & meeting/dating new women will help significantly.
This was the video that finally made me delete my Ex's number because I realise that I was always the price and that I was the one who created that image of her in my head and hence, I can undo it. Thank you coach!
Yes, usually we create a fantasy of her in our head & when she doesn't live up to it, we get angry & try to force her into that role. This just causes all kinds of problems & it'll eventually cause her to push you away & lose attraction. It's important that you not only see yourself as the prize, but you accept her for who she is...then decide if you can live with who she is, or not. Generally, most men's issue with women when it comes to an LTR is they don't want to accept who she is....in turn they become needy, whiny, over emotional, etc ultimately turning her off. It's that same fantasy of her that makes it so difficult to get over her & move on.
You are the best . Your videos are plane and simple and to the point without the BS fluff . Thank you
Thanks, man! I appreciate that!
Plain (not aeroplane!) (Y) Agreed, good videos and very down to earth to boot! Thanks Man
@@luker1hutcher315 Thank you!
@@luker1hutcher315 yeah I just saw that 🤣 I don’t check the autocorrect anymore , so annoying . Thanks for the correction 👍👍
Easy. Make urself and ur time resources and energuly a priority.
Yes, the answer is easy...but following through isn't so easy when you have an emotional attachment. But yes, that's how to handle it!
I do but still on my mind daily. Maybe i need to date someone else
so 2 months ago i had a relationship it started well and then in the next couple of weeks my relationship became very on and off and i kept on demanding what she had to do so eventually after 2 months we broke up. I heard she wanted to end the relationship so i cut her off before she even tried to talk.
a couple days after that she came back to me and said that she wanted me back and so becuase i still love her i accepted it. now it has been around 2 weeks and this week has been abit draining because she is somewhat doing the same thing.
she is definitely better than before and our relationship looks better for the most part but yeah she is kinda not really looking for me.. i know shes tired im also tired of the tasks that we have but the difference is.. is that i look forward to meeting her when im tired because i find being with her is relaxing. but, she on the other hand finds me as another task she has to do..
what should i do
When she disrespects you, you need to make her work for your attention again. Make her jump through more hoops so that she actually values your relationship
. Simply dump this toxic person and move on
Need help.
There is a shy & inexperienced girl who likes me. We live in same colony, we never talked to each other. We hardly make an eye contact, but her all body language suggest that she likes me. One day she came out from her comfort zone ( before that she used to nervous & vulnerable around me) stood far away from me stare at me, smile at me for sec. Next day she knew I am there she star giggling and laughing with her school frieds while staring at me secretly.
But suddenly next day she started ingnorong me harshly, make concerted efforts to avoid me. Maybe she realised that i also like her.
I am totally confused, don't know what to do, she doesn't even acknowledge my existence.
I don't know what that means, but you will never know for sure unless you talk to her. Approach her & introduce yourself. If she likes you, she is waiting for you to approach her. So, introduce yourself, flirt a little & get her out on a date.
She sees me & then stops as I'm speaking to a friend & then stares at me for 2 to 3 seconds after 1 year after I moved On? Why? After her disrespecting me, I walked away immediately losing interest.
I don't have a video on it, but learn to utilize the "soft next".
I needed this 3 months ago
F that b
You'll probably run into this again at some point. I've experienced several times over the years...
I set a date with My committed girlfriend of 7 months. after 30 minutes together she said that she needs to go home to feed her daughter.
I walked away because of that behavior.
Is it the right thing I did.
And what if she wants to reach me sooner after I walked away? Shall I teach her not to do that again?
I don't have enough context to answer that. I'm starting to think that you're just posting random scenarios in here & seeing how I answer....everyday there's a brand new scenario. Watch the videos, read the books I recommend. You have to understand the material so you know what to do when I'm not around.
Im in a situation of having a problem for my self confidence probably depress.it all started during the quarantine, i became a silent person and always think of i cant do this, and that thing,So i started to stay at my comfort zone and still struggling to break this habit. im 24 yrs old and just graduated from college this 2021 ( i should have graduated in 2019 but pandemic hits) no experience of work, but im still finding a job, got rejected 3 times , im currently unemployed and i have a 2 and half years of relationship to my first girlfriend, shes doing fine, currently working and helping her parents, she believe in me that i can work this out but times past and she is starting to control me like use this word “ how long should i wait for you to find a work” and she knows that im trying, she always wanted a vacation but i know will cost a lot so i told her that i can’t because of a money problem,and now i think she is using my problem to be the dominant one in our relationship. What should i do to get that respect that she has at the very start of our relationship?
Yes, if you continue down this road she will eventually lose respect & ultimately attraction. I've lost a couple of women whom I loved due to lack of money. They'll tolerate it for a while, but if it goes on too long they'll leave. I'm not trying to scare you...just giving you the facts. For the job, you just have to keep trying...don't give up. It's counterintuitive, but the more that you worry about it, the less likely chance of actually succeeding. Find a temporary job in the meantime. When I first started this business I was walking & boarding dogs, & delivering food (I HATED this!) while I worked to build this business. My last business ended up failing & I was out of money. Sometimes we have to do things we don't like until we can reach our goals. In terms of building your confidence again, you have to step outside your comfort zone & push yourself. It'll be uncomfortable & maybe even a little scary at first, but if you keep pushing yourself your confidence will grow. So, go be social, try new things, & push yourself...even when you don't feel like it.
@@SkillofAttraction i don’t even care if she leave me because of how unconfident i am right now, but i do wish she stay,the day i finally put myself back. I find your reply very helpful the way you interact to your subscriber’s really help others like me in this situation, relationship or building self confidence, thank you very much!!
@@blipblipblip4892 You'll regret it if you give up just because it's difficult right now. Everything will eventually get better, but you have to participate in your own rescue. No one is going to do it for you.
Coach, I'm not feeling so good. My girl flaked on me again. The first time, I thought it was a misunderstanding. This time she says she had to work, but she didn't text me for 6 hours and said she couldn't text. I waited and waited and had to drive back home in the rain all alone. I don't know what to do. If I complain, it makes me look desperate. But if I go ghost mode, then it might make it look like I'm too afraid to step up to her. She will text me at 2 am and want to talk about her deceased dog, but this doesn't feel good anymore. She wastes hours of my time and always has an excuse, but she wants me to comfort her at 2 am. Again, I feel stuck. Cuz if I communicate or don't communicate, it's not a good spot for me. Should I ghost her for a week to regain leverage? I can't believe how much my life is being affected right now. I wasn't expecting her to flake again.
Yea, that doesn't sound good! If it's done more than once, then I'd end it. She had no good excuse & what she did was completely disrespectful. Honestly, if you tolerate this the chances are quite high that she'll do it again...or do something even more disrespectful. Tolerating those little acts of disrespect turn into her demonstrating bigger acts of disrespect. So, don't complain, don't ghost...just tell her something like, "this isn't working for me. What you did was completely disrespectful & it's not going to happen again. I wish you well!" And if she wants you back, let her earn it. This means that she has to come to you for the first few dates, don't spend a lot of money on her...let her express her apology through her actions. A simple verbal apology isn't enough. Someone once said, "'I'm sorry' is just something people say so they can get permission to not feel bad about they did." Action speaks louder than words.
You may also want to check out this video about being strung along: th-cam.com/video/KDt7GVMoY7k/w-d-xo.html
@@SkillofAttraction man.. I texted her just that and she always has an excuse. Now she’s saying that she did text me but the WiFi is bad at her work. Had a story. How do I judge the situation? This has become some kind of pattern. It’s always something unbelievable.
@@JoeBudd-D I've been through something like this...there was always an excuse, but nothing changed. I learned that if she really cared as much as she said she did, there wouldn't have been excuses...she would've rectified the situation, because she knew it was pushing me away. In hindsight, I wish would've pulled the plug MUCH earlier & not let it all spin out of control to the point where I was no longer feeling love for her, but resentment...& angry at myself for putting up with it for so long. The problem here, besides the obvious, is that you WANT to believe her...you WANT this to work, but the reality is that it's not working & she's just making excuses for herself. She will never, NEVER take responsibility for her actions. Continually telling her where she's going wrong & not doing anything about it is only causing her to slowly lose respect for you. Deep down she knows that she's wrong...& she knows that you shouldn't be tolerating it. So, I would stand your ground & tell her that you've had it with her flaking & her excuses, & that if she decides that she wants to do this right, she's welcome to get in touch, but you're moving on. I know it's hard...walking away from someone who you love is one of the most difficult things you'll ever have to do, but what's worse is continuing to go through this for many more months, or years, & it never getting better...most likely it getting worse. And you being angry with yourself for not getting out when you know that you should have.
@@SkillofAttraction This is good advice. I used to think that it was just no contact, no contact. But in my case, do I tell her that an apology would be necessary? Could I say that sometimes it’s not our fault like you say you had no WiFi but that an apology would be necessary for my time i spent to drive and get ready? Is it manly to ask for an apology or is that needy?
I have watched and learned a lot about attraction from you and other TH-cam channel but I am not applying it to get girls. I am 25 years old from Nepal and my financial condition is not very good(i don't have job) ... I am thinking about first improve my finances then start dating but I am feeling like if I waited too long to start dating then young girls won't be interested in dating me after few more years when I will become 28 -30 years old and I won't get good girls to get married(my families are also looking for girls for me but I think if I get Married now I won't be able to focus on my goals) . What to do this situation?
You can do both (try improving your dating life while managing your financials). 25 is still so young. You shouldn't worry too much about your age right now unless let's say your 40 or maybe even 50.
I would at least try to get some girls maybe even one night stands to improve
You have the right idea in mind; however, I recommend that you do both! Putting your love/sex life on hold isn't a good idea, because when you're ready you're going to be inexperienced with girls. It's always a good idea to keep practicing, whether that be some girl you're casually dating or a girlfriend (or even your wife). You always want to be practicing flirting, seducing, gaming girls...it'll pay off in the long term.
@Diabetes - Yes, 25 is still pretty young! Plus, young men will never have a time in their life again where there are so many young, single women within reach. After 30, the dating pool thins considerably & it continues to thin the older you get. It's a good time to take advantage of the situation!
@@SkillofAttraction @diabetes thanks.
@@SkillofAttraction What do you think is the right age ,time and situation for me to start thinking about getting married and having kids? Because I don't want to miss out on marriage opportunities at the same time I don't want to get married too soon ....because I want to focus on my goals and don't want to be distracted by Marriage obligations. I fear if I waited to long to start thinking about marriage I will miss out on some great opportunities.
Hands down your best vid. Thank you
Hey thanks, man! Glad you liked it!
On a side note, i'm really confused about something that happened to me today. So i went to a party and approached a group of spanish girls (4 girls approx), and started talking to them, one of them asked for my insta immediately, I figured she was very attracted/interested in me, and I confirmed it when after a bit of flirting we started making out really wild, she couldn't get off me and we spent some time together at the party. She left for a bit and told me she had to go but was gonna do somethign first, so i said bet. MInutes later her friend finds me and tells me the girl was looking for me but eventually left. So i texted her where she was and after small talk i asked he to hangout sometime, she said "yea sometime", and when i asked her when is she free, she said the classic "i'll let you know" so i said alright, and i got left on seen. All this happened today in the same night. What the hell happened lol
Most likely she was either testing you, or you were just someone fun in the moment & she has no interest in pursuing. For future reference, it's best to not try to setup a date the same night you meet her. You want the mystery & tension build a bit before getting her out on a date. So, what I recommend that you do is wait several days & try again. Don't contact her during that time. If she reaches out before that time, then that's a really good sign that she has high interest...but if she doesn't, it doesn't necessarily mean that she's not interested.
@@SkillofAttraction that's what i thought, that it could've been a "one night thing" or that she might be testing me right now. What's funny is that i did the same with another girl which was almost the same situation, only that this other is not replying. So once I reach out after a week or so, how should I interact, should I do small talk and tell her that I'd love to see her or something like that?
@@yakdrago999 Yes, after about a week reach out to her with the only intention of having fun with her & ultimately getting her out on a date. If you want her, don't waste your time talking to her all hours of the night...save that stuff for in person meet up. be fun, playful, upbeat & get her out on a date.
@@SkillofAttraction yep makes sense, thank you Erik!
Same could use help been almost 2 years but she's in schoo and bout finish and she has a kid. Also but seems like I'm low priority went from seeing her everyday but now she bout graduate. Seems like she spends time with school and her friends
Prioritize yourself & follow what i suggested in this video.
Hey coach... Is it possible you can do a video on how to pull away properly?
How to pull away...from a woman?
@@SkillofAttraction yeah.. The proper way... Cause I've come to notice that it's really easy to do it the wrong way... Like being too cold or too diss... I know there's supposed to be a sort of balance but I'm not even sure the degree
@@bryanwolf5468 If she's pulling away, the best way to do it is by mirroring her level of effort & enthusiasm that she's currently investing in you (which is always subject to change). This way you're not doing too little or too much. However, if you're pulling away to get the attraction back up, or she's jerking you around, then it's best to slowly pull away. Suddenly pulling away without any clear reason (in her mind) can easily cause her to think you're playing games & she start playing games right back, which you absolutely don't want. So, as an example, if you typically contact her daily, this week only initiate contact 5-6 days a week, then the following week 4-5 days...& so on until she begins to chase you again. But overall, don't pull away just to get an reaction out of her...you want to turn your focus to productivity, goals, & hobbies. The idea is to take her off the pedestal & start putting your purpose & lifestyle ahead of her. You still want to be sure to make time for her, but if you feel that you have to pull away, then you probably are placing too much importance on her, or spending too much time together. But, I don't know your situation.
@@SkillofAttraction but that's the thing... I'm not.. I'm not doing any of that.. I've learnt from this channel and other channels with my past relationships... I made all the mistakes... Over calling... Over texting... Taking disrespect.. Being needy... Over complimenting.. I did all that but with this particular girl I try keeping my game really tight... It's so tight she's confessed to me on multiple occasions that she loves me.. I've never said it back cause I explained I'm not sure yet... She was upset but eventually she got okay with it and things have been smooth but ever since the beginning of this week everything has just been kinda off... She's not texting the way she use to.. It's like she's less enthusiastic... She takes her sweet time replying texts and today she called me, and at some point while we were talking she brings up her area, cause we've been in a long distance relationship.. We were supposed to meet for the first time next week and before now she's been excited about us meeting but she calls me today and tells me how it's not safe... Her place is kinda dangerous and she doesn't want me going back home alone by myself... Before I could question what brought this up she said she had to go do something and that she'd call me... As I write this message that was 2 hours ago and she hasn't called me back but she's been going in and out of whatsapp... Like it's driving me crazy.. I'm trying to maintain my masculine frame by not responding to this but wtfff.. It's just so annoying and I just want to ask her what the hell is going on but I'm trying to keep my shit together
Hey Erick , quick question . Women don’t love us the same way we love them , but when women are single they’re miserable , also I notice that once they invest their emotions into a male is very hard for them to cheat . Compared to us , we can love a women unconditionally but still cheat on them
I'm not sure what the question is, but that sounds about right.
how can i make her be the one whos giving all the love or atleast a 50/50? should i just cared about her like shes just my friend? so i shouldnt be too much about giving my love but i also shouldnt be too careless? or should i be so uncaring? or what? what should i do to get a relationship where she is the one whos doing most of the work like when she actually wanted me before we dated