Coach lee , i want to tell u thank u sooooooo much. I went to every step as u said , it works so well now on 18th May we r getting married. U r love. I love u.
These videos have truly been a blessing. Coming out of a 5.5 year relationship. Lived together, had a dog together, moved to a whole different state together with no support. A year later, she said she couldn’t do it anymore. Says that she has to ‘find herself’ and she doesn’t say one way or the other whether or not we will get back together at the breakup. Says that she still loves me, and said that in the worst case scenario we could stay friends. Started no contact and radio silence 2 days ago. I know you all are hurting, but we are in this together. Thank you coach Lee!
Sorry you're going through this man. I can relate. I'd been with my girl for 8 years. Lived together for 5. Had a 3 year old dog together. Broke up at the end of January this year. She didn't give specific reasons for anything, just saying she wanted space to be with friends and family. I initially had a hard time giving that to her as I was searching for answers while occupying my now empty apartment. Took me a little longer to find video like these to help make sense of things. Shitty thing in my case is we met in school, both rocked our shit and against all odds both got hired in the same department in a field with no jobs. Anyway hang in there man, I hope things turn around for you. It truly isnt easy.
These girls don’t know what they got. “Find myself” Lmao You can find yourself without a break up And “Need time with friends and family. Girl I was with you for 8 years , guess I’m not your family????!!! Lol
What she said was girlspeak for “i found a Chad and I want to see if I can hook him and reel him in. Stay away while I go run and bang Chad.” Best thing you can do is next her and do not look back. Trust me I speak from experience. Do not let her think you will hang around. Value yourself more than that. There is always better out there. Move on.
Thank YOU CJ :) Embracing this WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER> I so wish those of us could be invovled right now in an online coach lee support group. Where We Can Connect NOW and never again take crumbs from bums :)
Just had a 5 hour conversation with her that felt like 30 minutes. About a year of MINIMAL contact. Spoken about 4 times in a year but this is the first time I heard her laugh again. My dudes I was there with yall. I wanted life to end. Work on yourself, be patient...listen to Coach Lee. Not saying I got her back yet...but a ray of sunshine today. Backstory. The break up was 100% my fault. That's all I'm going to say. Best of luck to you guys and gals...I wish everyone the best.
If the breakup was your fault it shouldn't be you who does no contact. Coach Lee talked about it. It's the one who is at fault (the dumper or the one who caused the breakup by screwing things up) is now to take action, not go NC. This is at least what I understand from all Lee's movies
@Nat Smythe all right, but where is the apology part? If you watched Coach Lee's videos closely in such situations he advises to apologise or show some improvement and THEN go to NC. If it's your fault it's not your exes job to chase you. Lee explained it in videos like 'when NC won't work' etc. It's when the breakup wasn't the dumper's own decision but when it was kind of forced by the dumpee.
I ran across Coach Lee's videos while trying to find out what No Contact was all about, after the love of my life told me they were not in love with me and did not want to have a romantic relationship with me, only friendship. I declined that offer and went into No Contact. Coach Lee helped me to understand what I needed to do in my situation. I implemented everything I learned from him and the love of my life reached out to me after one year and six months of No Contact (you read that right, 1.5 years of No Contact) and admitted they are in love with me. We are now on the journey of building a new relationship. As we move forward, I am following Coach Lee's advice on what to do after No Contact. I believe it was by divine providence that I ran across Coach Lee's videos. God bless you, Coach Lee! Thank you!
Kinda crazy how the moral of everything coach Lee says is 1. Have value and see yourself as a catch 2. But be a decent person, not a narc or an asshole Thanks ❤
I love you coach Lee, went through a terrible break up and you saved me. I did everything you said, and we are back together again. Much blessings to you.
Oh man. My ex cam back. Declared his undying love for me, kissed me. I did the pull back, he kept reaching out, it was looking good with effort, then he disappeared for a month. Came back, same thing again. Despite me using all of your advice he keeps doing it. Please put a reminder not to let them do it more than 3 times. This is a fun game for people narcissistically abusing others.
I can’t believe how well NC works! I was able to get a guy back by using it. We went NC for close to a month. This guy was super stubborn. I honestly thought there was no chance whatsoever. I left him alone. Didn’t bother him at all. When I ran into him I stayed cool. Didn’t bring anything up. I was friendly and not cold. We ended up having a very calm discussion about everything a few weeks later. I’m so glad I chose this route. I used to beg guys to not leave or to take me back. It never works that way.
Coach Lee… your timing is impeccable. Just last night (almost exactly when you posted this video) and after 39 days since the breakup and no contact, my ex texted me this extremely long apology. Now I have some direction in how I should respond. I almost feel as if the universe intervened here. You have been my rock throughout this ordeal… I am incredibly grateful for your advice. Thank you!
After the break up, i did no contact right away, he reached out to me a few times, i stayed calm and casual, let him have the break up. After 3 weeks, he called me and said he missed me, without me, he was missing something, and wanted to get back with me. I take it slowly. Thank you very much Coach Lee, i am stronger and better now.
Coach Lee, thanks for the tutorials. I followed them carefully, & after 10 months past break up, we're back together. Thank you once again & above all, glory be to God.
It's been two months for me. I'm focusing more on myself-diet, exercise, and therapy twice weekly. The worst is behind me now as far as emotions. I learned that if someone walks out of my life, I must let them GO! Getting on with my life was the best decision I have ever made. I'm glad we're not and never will be, together in any way. We were wrong for each other. Update: It’s been seven months now. Since my last post, I’ve donated everything he left behind and burned all the cards and letters he had ever sent.
I’m a client of coach Ken’s. I truly love that guy like a brother. My ex reached out last week after 4 months (to the day) of no contact. I’ve been running straight out of the Coach Ken & Lee Playbook. It has worked like a charm. She temperature checked me last week; casual, warm, friendly and reserved. I’m not chasing. She has enough now to know she won’t be rejected, but she has to take steps toward me. Coaches Lee and Ken. They know what they are doing. Listen to them and follow their advice.
Thats awesome. Im in the exact same time frame. Im a client of Coach Rex. My situation is more complex though. I broke up with her. I did not want too and I do regret it. Im willing to work on it if she is. She lives next door to me and her 17 yr old still lives with me. I hope to have positive results one day. She is still ignoring me but I feel that will change.
@@Kay-zu5xd coming up on 15 months. I was going to propose at 18. She’s a borderline personality. She freaked out as soon as she realized I was serious about wanting to marry her. Classic BPD behavior. Seriously. Book a call with coach Ken. He knows his stuff on this and can give you good advice. There are a lot of terrible relationship coaches on TH-cam. Lee and Ken are the real deal.
What do you do when your ex posts pictures on social media? Do you like them or watch their stories? I didnt watch or like any of their posts since no contact
@@rdsieben what was it they said? I started no contact a little over a week ago, three days after my ex officially broke up with me after taking some time away to think over things in her head. She’s reached out a couple times just saying things like “hope you’re doing okay today” two days after I stopped messaging her. Then a couple days ago she said “I hope you have a great day today” both times we had a short conversation just saying I’m doing good and some of the things I’ve been doing and how school is going for her. Don’t know how to take this since it’s only been a couple weeks since she first told me she wasn’t sure if she wanted our relationship
@@thatboywiththefez I would have ignored those responses. She's looking for validation. Just keep ignoring "I hope you are okay" type responses until she says something significant like mine did after four days.
coach lee, i love and appreciate your work so much, seriously. i went for NC for 2-3 months, and now my ex is starting to make moves; however, I'm still staying distant. everything lee says is true fellas
@@Samx838 hey, yes! long story short, my ex kept inviting me to hang out and wanting to get back together. however, after some deep self reflections I realized that I've outgrown this relationship and don't feel the same about the person. I told him that and he left the country, but still kept stalking my social media. I was happy than ever to let that person go myself. So everything will be alright, don't worry.
Coach Lee, we met up by chance and she pretty much begged for a second chance. She said she never lost feelings and lied about why she left we made love and had a wonderful time. I gave her the second chance she asked for, then a month later she changed her mind.
This is what i love about coach Lee. So precise and so clear in explaining. That’s why i also want to rewatch all his videos if i am free, cause it is so refreshing also and regaining my strength, he has that kind of power. Thank you, Coach. 💕
After my ex broke up with me in a moment of anger almost one year ago, he kept reaching out regularly. The reason he did that was because he wanted to check if I would stil accept his terms and conditions to get married. Two weeks ago I told him that I still dont accept his conditions, he blamed me that I am the one who changed and he does not want to change, and he thought I was open to sleep with him while our status was unresolved. I think I dodged a huge lethal bullet with this one.
Coach Lee, Your advice is top notch and it works! I was just contacted by my ex when it appeared there was no hope. I now know how to proceed. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!
He contacted me the day before you posted this video. Thankfully I have watched all your video's and knew what to do. I responded back to him in a friendly manner, did not ignore him. Kept the conversation light, happy, positive and friendly. This happened on a Friday evening so that makes me think he may have just been curious if I was on a date or seeing someone. The next move is his. I am not going to reach out to him unless he contacts me. The break up was what he thought he wanted so I gave it to him. I have followed your advice for the past three years with this off and on, in and out, hot and cold guy who can't seem to get his shit together. We're friends and that's the way it is. I'm happy in my life with or without him.
He has been stringing me along for four years. I gave up on him only contacting me when he was needing attention or his ego boosted. He didn't want me but was afraid I'd find someone else. I finally got to the point I had to close the door on any thoughts of us seeing each other again. I was totally getting him out of my system when suddenly he contacted me after my last text to him six months ago. I have no idea where things will go from here but I'll be fine no matter what. The next move is his, he can either take or disappear again. Nothing he does surprises,me anymore, infact....it's gotten very routine and BORING.
You are helping me to keep my girlfriend since 2018,even i had knowleg before with women but you made me realise that i was blind. Thank you so much lee.
Anyone who is here I promise it will get better. I’m on day 3 haven’t been able to eat much but I started the no contact rule today and I’ll keep you updated
I did no contact,after a week,he reached out,I replied,then he disappeared,I feel like he's breadcrumbling me,am feeding his ego,it's frustrating,I think if someone decides that they're done with you the best thing you can do for them is to accept that their love was never yours,I am ready to move on,I always try to move on but it's like he senses it and comes back,'hope is a very dangerous thing' I hope he never reaches out again,i understand now when people say you can love someone but still choose to let them go.i want to heal now,please let me heal.
I‘m 1 month shy of 1 full year of breakup. Had contact once where she texted me for my birthday about 4 months after the breakup. It was a fun and light conversation. Otherwise it was NC. Now I‘m meeting someone else. It does work out in the end, but not always with your ex :)
This is great. My ex contacted me after one and a half months of my going no contact. So this is excellent advice. Some of it I had already determined, but a lot of it I hadn't really thought of. So thanks for the great advice on how I must approach his contacting me. I have never allowed the breakup to cramp my style socially and have kept myself open to finding someone new....no way any man will every cramp my style. I will say this however, he will find a totally different me when he eventually fully connects with me......quite frankly I don't know if I even want him back...but will keep an open mind....all that time away really gave me time to examine who he really is.. the distance gave me clarity....You rock Coach Lee!! Luv ya.
Hi coach lee. I have learned so much from you and it is helping with my current break-up. The one thing that resonates most with me is when you talk about “giving them the break-up”. I have had some time and reflection on this (I am also a paying member of the emergency break-up kit) I believe it it also important to add that we don’t only need to give “them” the break-up, but to give ourselves the break-up. I’m still learning and find huge value in all your knowledge and wisdom. Keep doing what you are doing. We are all growing
Day 5 of no contact and quite frankly, I don't want her back. There is a part of me that wants her to grieve the loss dearly so she learns not to take someone else for granted in the future.
Your videos have helped me so much Coach Lee! I have been the needy ex too many times. Your words have a way of comforting me and making me strong. Many thanks!
I am done with the emergency kit it’s a powerful one too💜 it’s a must have for all women even do they not experiencing break up, but well prepared in the future in case thanks again men of wisdom 😍
Hey coach Lee, it's been a while since I've seen one of your videos. Me and my ex encountered each other at the gym yesterday and we talked for 2 hours. I kept myself together and kept the conversation light hearted. She kept offering to help me out whenever I needed tips on lifting weights and whatnot and even offered to sell me her car. We caught up a lot, she told me I looked good and that I was doing a great job and that I looked thinner. I was very honest with how everything was, I never brought up the break up, but she actually did once we talked how I was hoping she wouldn't blow me off when I approached her (jokingly) and she said she thought enough time has passed by for her to talk to me and honestly everything ended on a good note, she gave me 3 side hugs within those two hours. I'm just commenting because I'm not sure what to do from here other than just keep doing on what I'm doing and work on myself. I'm not really trying to get her back, but it'd be nice to know that there's still a chance down the road.
@@jessicadavis4163 I was with this girl for almost 6 years, but half way through the relationship she kinda did me dirty (she didn't cheat but it felt very similar) and I was very bitter and I couldn't love her with my full potential because I felt betrayed by the one person I truly wanted to grow with
@@stargazer19969 My ex did those same things to me but we weren’t broken up that long. He cheated on me and did me extremelllyyyyyy dirty, so I completely understand. Why I still haven’t completely left the guy after all the horrendous things he’s done to me, I truly have no idea. If anyone heard what he’s done to me, everyone would tell me to run! I mean, if you’re okay not being with her, then just keep working on you! You seem like you’re in a really great spot physically and mentally. That’s amazing!
hahah in awe right now with how my life circumstances turned out with her chasing me now and before i was simping for her will smith style but still skeptical to let her back into my life. i feel reserved but not rejecting her. also i met some other girl, but shes graduating/leaving school soon so its intersting how the cards are unfolding. appreciate it coach lee.
My situation is so of the grid I'm literally so lost at this point. To break it down as simple as I can 1. She broke up with me (It happened cause of me, I didn't have emotional control in many cases, I said things I shouldn't have said) and she said she need time and space to heal herself. 2. We have dogs together (it's hard to do no contact when I almost need to at some points) 3. After about a week we had a very civil conversation and I explained to her I understand why she did it (to save the relationship basically) cause I was treating her poorly. She was glad to hear I actually had the time to self reflect about what happen and how I'm improving. 4. I caught her lying about having plans to avoid me (it's a super long story, she said she didn't want to hurt my feelings cause I asked her to go mini golfing) but we had a very long and civil talk about that aswell. 5. We have had sex 3 times now I don't know if this is good or bad, each time we do it, it just feels so euphoric, not even the sex but just the mind connection we both have during it. It's so hard to explain. But I don't know if I should continue it, it's not like we have planned any of it. But the times we have seen each other it's like it uncontrollable. I guess my concern is, I feel like we are rebuilding a new bond again with doing it, but at the same time I don't know if giving her the opportunity to have sex with me while not in a relationship is doing more harm than good. UPDATE: just want to give hope to people, after making it very clear that I wasn't coming back, that's when the tables turned, we are now back together and are very happy! So just don't give up and what you believe is right.
Hi coach lee. It is been 3 months since I have been doing no contact, and yes, I want to thank you for making me so strong I owe my strength to you. He first started reaching out through text and I calls I had to change my number, then he started emailing me every week. He emailed me a beautiful poem about me and all my traits and it made me cry. But I dont want to get back with him because he is toxic and I am trying to stay strong and move on, also one of my coworkers told me she had seen him with another girl walking down the street, which why I choose to stay firm and strong in no contact. I will move on.
I’m confused. Why do you consider yourself in no contact? You claim you don’t want the person back… but, … and, yet… you are here on a forum designed to help us learn the things we need to do to “get our ex back”? You are confusing. Do you even know what you want?
@@tooxlent Thomas, have you been following Coach Lee? If not, when you are in NO CONTACT after a breakup, it gives YOU time to think about what YOU want to do. If she broke up with you, it's up to HER to call you. If you broke up with her, then you would be the one to call her. The no contact gives you time to think about what you want to say and do. It makes sense bcse it helps you reflect on the relationship too. Think about it...Good luck to you always..
@@jannlewandowski5540 So, she wanted him back, then she decided she didn't want him back because he was "toxic", even though, he reached out to her. obviously multiple times, and was rejected, so, he went out with another girl. And now she wants to shame him, and stay permanently broke up with him? You do realize, he reached out. obviously more than one time. She was getting what she wanted, which was to have him come back to her, and yet, she blew him off, and so he began the process of moving on, and now she wants to say that it is his fault, that he was toxic, that he's a dick, and that she needs to stay in no contact, and never talk to hime again? No contact worked. it got him to contact her. The fact that SHE ignored him makes this her fault. She's the bad one. She's toxic. I mean no contact worked, it got him to want her back, she blew this. It was not him. she had her chance.
Coming up on 30 days of NC after a 4.5 year relationship, it's been so hard. I still havent lost hope that my ex will change his mind. It's tough watching so many of these videos that prep you for "how to respond when your ex comes back" and the signs, because I haven't seen any of these yet. I moved back to my hometown after the breakup, he doesn't do social media and also has a lot to keep him busy with work, so part of me feels I will never see or hear from him again, but I can't let go. I'm feeling proud of the progress I've made and how I am still enjoying the life I worked hard to build, but that hope is both a thorn in my side and a lullaby at night.
It's tough, but over time it will get easier. The fact you're working on yourself and building your future is a great sign of improvement, so be proud of that 🙂 by the time they do contact you, you may have moved on
@@Camcam75 it's been > 1 year NC. I let him go. Life moved on, and I guess I have but haven't at the same time. I tried dating again and it went awfully. I'm still broken. I never heard anything about his life afterwards, and I hope I never do. Sorry for the crap update 🥴
Thank you coach Lee, I am sooo happy I found you during that hard period of my life. You've been so helpful. I listened to your advice during the no contanct and after my ex contacted me and we are now back together.
Thank you coach Lee you have been right about everything. My ex and I broke up in September but have been on and off the whole time. I guess I started rushing her back into things and she said she wanted space for her last month at the college we both go to. 3 weeks went by and she reached out. We are still not talking but letting her do her thing is working. Your videos keep me disciplined and I appreciate you for taking the time to make these.
You are watching this video because you don’t have a choice !!! I know how much you want your partner to be with you or to make him or her to fall in love with you again !! If it’s meant to be , it will be !!! Only time will heal !!! Trust me!!!
My ex contacted me yesterday after a few weeks of no contact. It didn't feel right to ignore him, as I know him well enough to know it took a lot of thinking on his part to actually do so, so I am happy I found this video.
My ex recently reached out (first since our last contact which was 4 months ago). I had the sense that he was a tad bit nervous, and I made the mistake of cracking a few too many jokes. I sent him a msg saying that I appreciated him reaching out, and I wanted him to know that I had no hard feelings towards him, and only see him in good light because he's a good person. He responded back saying "Awesome, thank you so much. You've helped build up my confidence, appreciate it." I didn't quite understand his response and left it as a joke and went with I am dope lol, and I know that he is working on himself and that's great. I didn't understand his confidence comment.
I hope I can come back to this comment I’m posting to say this truly works. I’m currently on 10 days of no contact. I’m hurting pretty bad as I miss her so much. But I really need to shift my focus on myself for now.
After 3 weeks NC, he texted me twice then called me and did normal small talk and invited me over for dinner and movie. I said, no its late thanks i work tomorrow. Said gn to each other. The next day he sent a few flirty texts and thats it so far. I kept it short and sweet. Im gonna keep strong and stay NC unless he does the work. Seems this is the beginning, lets see what happens.
It's been six months since we broke up and 4 months NC after a 3-year stable relationship. I've been working on myself (exercising, focusing on my work, going out w/ friends, volunteering, even thinking of starting a business) and when I thought I was okay, I saw a photo of him w/ his new gf. She met his family and she's now joining family pics. All the pain came rushing back. I guess there had always been a tiny flicker of hope we'd get back together eventually but it looks like he has moved on. It looks like it's serious & not just a rebound. At this point, I just really want the pain and longing to end. It's excruciating to see the person you love go love someone else.
Joining family pics persay does not really mean much. Remember that Divorced couples joined pics as well. The truth is that most boyfriend girlfriend relationships fell anyway even if it’s not a rebound relationship because the foundation is usually not solid. That being said, all you have to do is focus on shining and being the best version of you. For the summer, just say to yourself I’m gonna use it to be the best me. You can not be resisted if your are the best version of you. You cannot stop the sun from shining right… Shine ✨
@@timsimon8995this is such a good advice. I always visualize myself being together with them but when you remember the disrespect that will make you think otherwise
@freakynikki08 I'm sure by now, which is a year after you wrote this comment, you feel much better, maybe you have found someone else! maybe you got back with your ex, who knows?... but it doesn't hurt as much anymore,doest it? life goes on... and it's too short and too valuable to be wasted thinking about and hurting over someone who doesn't deserve you...
If you're looking on his socials, it really wasn't no contact. True no contact means: do not let your ex be any part of your life. Move on, focus on yourself and new endeavours. 6 months should potentially be enough time to heal and grow as a person so that it doesn't matter anymore even if you bumped into your ex and his new gf on the street or wherever. Remove this man out of your life completely and focus your energy on better things.
Hi Coach Lee, my ex and I are back together!! After the break up, my gf suggested I watch your videos bc they helped her. I want to tysm for all of your help! You kept me strong throughout it all. I hope this comment gives someone support and faith that it really is possible xx
The point of an ex is an ex ….silent is the best response. Why would anyone want to reopen old wounds just to see if it heals again . Absolute nonsense
It’s been about a month for me and it’s hard. The past couple of days I’ve been super depressed and crying. I want to reach out so bad but I know that it won’t change anything. I miss him so much
My ex sent back my jacket and shirt back in the post yesterday with a note asking me how I was and asking how my mother was. after being broken up 5 weeks . We are 2 weeks in no contact. I replied later last night in a calm and assured way and I let the conversation fade after a positive interaction. I let her be the last to text. I’m back into no contact now again. Looks like her interest is going up coach Lee. 👍
My ex reached out to me after 4 weeks of no contact after i begged and pleaded. I even got myself blocked due to the chasing and begging. Wish i would have found these videos before that. She sent me some pictures from her trip and asked how am i doing. She has been silent the past few days after that. But this finally feels like a step to the right direction.
Update: Few days ago she started to text me a lot and i ended up spending couple of nights at her place. We spent our time doing fun activities and cuddling and kissing. We talked about our relationship and how we can fix things. We decided we're going to take things slow and see how we feel about it. . We text every day but take some alone time too to see how were feeling. So no contact really works even tho it feels like a living hell. She told me she was very worried that i move on and couldn't bear the thought of it. Right now i am over the moon and this feels like a new beginning. Thank you Coach Lee for giving me the strength to trust the process! I owe you big time.
finally from 3 months i just got a message from my ex ....just in time watching this ...i guess my first step is to stay cool and just accept his apololgy...
🙏Thank u coach, your videos calm Me even though I'm sure it's over forever they still give me some hope ... my 6 months relationship was over... it was perfect but it was over deu to religious cause from them.. i did alot of mistakes like begging and raging for 3 weeks then did no contact but broke it after 1 month to give them back their stuff and took one of mine and I did sincere apology for my behaviour ... they wished me good luck and I'm still blocked everywhere ... now I'm on day 13 I'm getting stronger with some bad hours
I’m was doing so well with no contact then they contacted me said they would call me later and didn’t. I’m on no contact again and will not be making any contact until they do. I think they are testing me. Thanks coach lee you really are helping me so much.
Your videos are insightful. Some pieces resonate. Others almost feel like games. I’m certain I’m doing everything wrong. And so is he, honestly. He calls everyday. We go on dates. I’ve been too honest. Too forgiving. It’s been pretty painful.
I think a lot of the time when your ex reaches out, it’s because they are rebounding off of someone they were dating after you and they feel that going back to you is a sure thing to take their minds off of the person they were just seeing.
My ex texted me after 8 days. She apologized for being distant. I have a sense that she's been going through a rough time but I still wish she would have leaned on me for support. I need to convey to her that going dark isn't healthy. In this case, I am deferring any judgment because I don't have all the details yet. I will approach it with an open mind.
Hi coach Lee thanks again for this powerful video and also for making me a smart women I was very naive and I’ve been in a manipulative relationship but I feel safe now may ur day be blessed and ur family 💜🙏
1. If an X reaches out I would say leave it at least 2 days or a week & be casual about the response, ie act unexpected & if she respond back leave your responses minimal so she does the chasing but do it like u met her for the first time!! 2. Like host says...;) if the X Apologies, me personally acknowledge that you didn't like how it went but your cool as it passed tense... this may get the X to pinpoint her part in it which is good & if she does you could elaborate a little more so she knows you saw same thing or maybe a bit more so she knows yes you saw that.. At the same time you not giving impression u lookin to take her back!!!! Make it sound like you talking about a stranger so it takes away the directness & hopefully gets her to again show you where she went wrong ie she should do most of the talking!!!! Never tell your X your hurting even if she might see something in your face or body language so obviously tone that down keep a stowic look but try to come across like your life is positive & may even brief mention what you doing....but that's it cuz it shows you can move on from she!!!! Especially if you know your X has not improved her life for whatever reason she knows herself, hence coming knock back on your door so to speak!!!! If you show your hurt, a females biological attraction will switch off & she will just repeat same behaviour & ghost you!!!! Because of a female narsastic biological tendencies, my host is 100% right!!! 3. Like host states your X tries to make a move. ...you should move back from a kiss, or if the hug is strangling you. Pull back some so she knows it ain't as easy as that which should also back up points 1 & 2. Even if she wants to get back. you let them know right about now the answers NO. You don't need to be toxic about it but a casual NO cuz this also reiterates what you've been saying since she got back in contact with YOU!! If you do kiss her or she hugs keep it brief on the kiss & slightly pull away drop your arms slowly so she senses the pull back. Now if your a guy who works out she's gonna feel & see that manly strength in you & she's gonna miss that!!!!!!! Meaning you are your own security out or at home You got your own place & can move your life forward & without her so she can clearly see. without you evening saying anything!!!! Gives her something to fight for Creates sexual tension She reiterates specifics in herself so you may see she understanding her own nonsense She gains respect for u She looks at you like a female should for the guy she wants She also show submissiveness She gets that feeling back that you may have had b4 Like my host says you could be a little bit playful but switch that off like it never happened but guess what she saw it!!!! You could even if lets say your having dinner or bar & her hair is in the way of her eye, you could reach over move her hair out the way but keep your cool as this will confuse her but interest her same time but also adds a smigen of sexual tension. 4. Like host says about X contacting you regularly.... Don't forget your busy in your own endeavours, don't respond too soon, leave it few hours or all day as you at work but be brief still go on like that was the first contact. Keep doing this over a period of weeks maybe but if she contacts you everyday, no you don't need to be getting into no full blown chit chat & your busy so you let her know when you get chance cuz at work you will response once you've finished whatever it is your doin or even you go gym Mon. Wed & Fri so after the gym you will respond. She may even ask to come along if you know she a gym goer but that's where you will be so she knows but don't be arranging this. If she wants to go their when your there then she can if she wants but if it turns out she never came. don't be texting asking. Carryon your day to day routine & let her bring up why she never came but have no opinion about it. Now she knows part of what you do!!! She may even ask if your seeing anyone & you could say yeh you see people now & then or even your supposed to go on a date but right about now it kinda friends as your just sering how you & her may click or not.... This may add some jealousy which is good!!! In some cases if she knows the day of the date. She's gonna text you how it's going, but don't text her back until maybe the next day so the X thinks did he sleep with her, have they bonded meaning she might not get you back. Even if no date make out like u r but one word type answer do its not obvious you trying to make her jealous or play games!!!!! If she refers to you as her boyfriend ie the X you can give her a look if people are around or if just you & her you can say "I don't know about that right now" but keep it cool as if to say she reads she got to put in the work! 5. The host mentions if your X talks about a future with you - well throughout points 1-4 your life should already have a plan which shows her you have your own future clearly but now she trying to join in on that, well ok just keep doing what your doing through points 1-4 & just say we will see but your not gonna promise anything & just run with that until you think you can see potential but meanwhile keep on your focus, with work. Your business. Gym etc & keep texts at a minimum cuz you have this life without her & what she's gonna want to do is meet up so you can have 1 on 1, so I it's a case of keep it cool may even go on another date with thd previous potential new female but after that don't bring it up again because if one night you don't respond your X is gonn b thinking is he with this new female whose gonna want to see more of him & she's brand new !!! It's all guess work & always be willing to lose her again if she shows signs of previous nonsense she showed b4!!!! Keep up your mission goals etc throughout even if you get back with her but always keep in your mind it could be another breakup but if it does, let her go & be on your mission so she now knows moving forward!!!!!!! All in all good advice from this HOST.. on point!!!!! :)
I got my ex back after 1 month and 1 week away 😩😩😩I am soo happy after no contact she agreed that she was angry for 2 weeks after that she started to remembering me my good stuff she said I love u I couldn’t even do anything I just wanted u back after I was blocked guys remember I dint give her much time when we got back but I spoke normal not as friend nor as lover just normal after 3 days we got back follow this 🥂🥂🥂🥂thank u thank u
@@thehavoc6331 no we started talking and she told me that I never found anyone like u now it’s 3 months we are back and woow she is soo good with me she is acting like how I was before if I reply little late she thinks she will lose me she does what ever I love man it’s good
@@armanthegreat5554 that's great to hear that mate!! The relationship bond usually becomes stronger after breakup I hope you guys the best future ahead together ❤️💪
Hello coach Lee my ex just contacted me earlier after 7 months of no contact. So, I'm back here again watching this video from you. You're a blessing! Anyways, I no longer have the urge to want him back. I've learned a lot and I am now happy without him but still want to watch this video to know more tips. Thanks again.
Coach this is actually very important. Your teaching us to stay in no contact that puts us in such a negative victim state. Actually we are empowered like a excellent chess player we KNOW its Their Move is a Better Way to phrase /frame it. This Puts Us in Total POWER. No stress of fear of needing them to make their Move. We are Freed by the Notion that we KNOW DAMNED GOOD and well from your Coaching us that IT"S THEIR MOVE. Staying in no contact is a horrible way to frame it. Its causing needless turmoil and we are shooting ourseleves in the foot just as a concept it needs to change.
@@RealCoachLee Coach Lee 🥰, I am a person of habit to do this important text to him once a week for the year we have known each other , it's not romantic or related at all to me , I still wish him for Shabbos 🙏🔯 because if I didn't this would be bad and he will notice , so no contact at all is not something I can do. . . And we still meet but are friends
This advice is all spot on! I agree with everything you suggest - My only issue with the whole thing is a feeling of resentment towards the person that it took my absence for them to see my value. I'm not sure whether I'd want to be with someone who could drop me. Surely that's a secure response? I find a lot of advice a little conflicting. I understand if the dumpee cheated or was neglectful, but simply an issue of attraction? I'm not sure I want to play an uncertain dance for the rest of my life when really, it'd be nice to be able to genuine without fear of them leaving. It's a funny one! My question I suppose is, should you take someone back who rejected you? When you didn't do anything specifically wrong? Even if you miss them, what would that say about me? If my authentic self isn't good enough, why bother 🤷♀️
That's always going to be up to the individual to decide. In my case, we had unresolved trauma but really loved each other. We broke up, both improved and healed... Now I want her back. In your case? You have to look inside and see if you can believe they can come back for the right reasons or not. Take it slow if they do come back and investigate that question seriously. If they just aren't that interested, and that won't change, sure. If they made a mistake you can understand and forgive if they acknowledge, then it's up to you.
My ex contacted me after around 6 weeks apart. The initial conversations were good. But then it became clear she was simply getting in touch to tell me about herself, and showing absolutely no intrest in me at all. It was all about her, and he college stuff and I'm convinced she wanted validation, nothing more. I called her out on it (politely) by simply saying she would have found it impolite if roles had been reversed. Haven't heard from her since. Been just over a month. If I'm honest, though. Perhaps breaking up was for the best. Frees me up to find someone who truly values us as a couple and will put in the work. No Contact DOES work though!
he made a move, flirted with me, missed me, but he still says he's trying to work things out with his rebound. he was candid enough to tell me that what he needs (company, physical touch) his rebound can't give bec they are doing LDR. it's like he still doesn't get it.
Wow.. That's exactly what my Ex did, gave me Breadcrumbs. He says he wants to see where it goes with the Rebound. The dumbest thing ever. I hope it blows up in his face.
Hi Coach Lee. Love your videos! Would you consider putting up a video about 'when your ex leaves you for someone else' and the best plan of action to get them back if its a limerence type of situation? Thank you!
My ex broke up with me and reached out a few months later saying he misses me and apologizing. He didn't say he wanted to get back together though, he said that the past is in the past... I told him I have accepted the break up and that I intend to move on and it has now 1 month of radio silence. I do wish to get back with him but I am afraid I have messed things up and there is no chance now. That he is happier without me... Was this then the only stage of 'reaching out'? UPDATE 1: So he wrote to me weeks later again about how much he missed me and wants to be with me but wants to move on. What the hell is that supposed to mean? I am going to do nothing about it. UPDATE 2: I don't want him back anymore:) (7 months later after a 4y relationship) I hope it helps someone to see how desperate I was first but am doing much better!!
@@brandonnykyforak yeah, reached out a third time. He was curious about how I was doing, told me he missed me but doesn't want to get back together and wants to stay in touch, I said no I can't, I will move on now. The old me would have continued to talk, but I am so much stronger. I know he will reach out again, and again because that's how he is. But no contact made me find myself and I don't want him anymore. What's your situation?
My ex really meant a lot to me. after 8 years, lived together, grow up together, have 2 dogs together and engagement, she broke up with me right when I got a promotion and planning to move to a new city with her... It was rough to go through this then move to a place I know no one, so I begged and maintained contact with her for entire year, suggested getting back together multiple times and got rejected. Thank god I come across your videos Coach Lee, I started no contact 2 weeks ago, and I watch your video daily to stay strong for my own sake and as a last effort to see if there are any chance for us. She started reached out, said "I miss you", "how are you doing" and react to my social media posts, I am taking your lessons and approaching everything slowly. Your videos are underrated, thank you for making them.
Hey bro so my ex totally cut me out 1 month ago, just didn’t want to talk then forget about me, I had 1 week hard aniexty, went no contact , total no contact, watched your videos daily, weathered the emotional roller coaster, after 4 weeks, she contacted me, I was surprised how unfazed I was by her contacting me, I got back on my mission in them 4 weeks, don’t know if I want to get back with her now tbh, getting back on my mission was empowering and only through no contact could I do this, your vids are great, helping so many people like myself in very stressful times, god bless ya man, hope u see this comment, keep the videos going and also anyone reading this, no contact is legit ✌🏻
I actually reached out to my ex. It’s been a year since the breakup. He responded right away. All positive and kept asking questions. I was kind but kept it short. He brought up that a new season of show we watched together came out .. even responded to something we talked the next morning. Soo what now? I honestly feel I should do nothing now. Just wait and see?!?!
My ex reached out after about 5 days of no contact. She brought me some things from a favorite store of ours, brought me breakfast to my house the next day and hungout, then dinner two more nights in a row. Shes had a rough week. So I was there to help her relax. I didn't get my hopes up during that time. But After i got home after the last dinner, i recieved a text from her stating she feels she should give me space, that its been unfair of her to lean on my comfort and affection when its convenient for her when shes asked for space. She felt like she was taking me for granted she said. Especially since she is still unsure if she wants to try us again. So, i told I didn't think she was, but I will respect her space. Im struggling though how to interpret it all. And now, back into no contact. Am I back at square one now??
Thank you for another great video! Nine weeks broken up,one month no contact and I’ve broken NC. She still has some personal stuff and owes me money. Yeah this could get ugly. I am keeping it casual and polite. Personally I want closure with her on this part. The rest can come later.
Yeahhh the rule about "be nice to your ex and don't make them feel bad for how they treated you" (paraphrased) is a dealbreaker. At no point am I willing to suppress my anger and other feelings about the way he treated me on the way out, nor am I willing to let him off the hook for owning up to it and making it right. If THAT'S what I'd have to do to get him back, then I don't want him. "Your ex is cold and mean because they're not attracted to you anymore" is not an acceptable excuse for the behavior. I know what I deserve, and I'll find it with someone else.
Thank you Coach Lee! Your method works especially the No Contact Rule. My husband and I are back together! I can’t thank you enough 🤗
after how long of no contact?
@@andramihaela9757 it was a month exactly
I'm so happy for you and for the sake of LOVE. Coach Lee is by far the best, to me he's St-Lee
35 days of NC....almost killed me....but he reached out...I cannot believe it! ❤ I'm going soooo slow
@@terribickford2228 yay!! ❤️
Coach lee , i want to tell u thank u sooooooo much. I went to every step as u said , it works so well now on 18th May we r getting married. U r love. I love u.
Congrats mate, I hope I get there too. Thanks for sharing that, it gives the rest of us hope!
Congrats!!
Congratulations 🎊
Happy for u
Congratulations bro!
Make sure you keep getting more attractive
These videos have truly been a blessing. Coming out of a 5.5 year relationship. Lived together, had a dog together, moved to a whole different state together with no support. A year later, she said she couldn’t do it anymore. Says that she has to ‘find herself’ and she doesn’t say one way or the other whether or not we will get back together at the breakup. Says that she still loves me, and said that in the worst case scenario we could stay friends. Started no contact and radio silence 2 days ago. I know you all are hurting, but we are in this together. Thank you coach Lee!
Sorry you're going through this man. I can relate. I'd been with my girl for 8 years. Lived together for 5. Had a 3 year old dog together. Broke up at the end of January this year. She didn't give specific reasons for anything, just saying she wanted space to be with friends and family. I initially had a hard time giving that to her as I was searching for answers while occupying my now empty apartment. Took me a little longer to find video like these to help make sense of things. Shitty thing in my case is we met in school, both rocked our shit and against all odds both got hired in the same department in a field with no jobs. Anyway hang in there man, I hope things turn around for you. It truly isnt easy.
These girls don’t know what they got.
“Find myself”
Lmao
You can find yourself without a break up
And
“Need time with friends and family. Girl I was with you for 8 years , guess I’m not your family????!!!
Lol
What she said was girlspeak for “i found a Chad and I want to see if I can hook him and reel him in. Stay away while I go run and bang Chad.”
Best thing you can do is next her and do not look back. Trust me I speak from experience. Do not let her think you will hang around. Value yourself more than that. There is always better out there. Move on.
@@dailydoseofreason6663 Must Remember My Daily Dose of Reason. :) ! CHEERS!
Thank YOU CJ :) Embracing this WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER> I so wish those of us could be invovled right now in an online coach lee support group. Where We Can Connect NOW and never again take crumbs from bums :)
Just had a 5 hour conversation with her that felt like 30 minutes. About a year of MINIMAL contact. Spoken about 4 times in a year but this is the first time I heard her laugh again. My dudes I was there with yall. I wanted life to end. Work on yourself, be patient...listen to Coach Lee. Not saying I got her back yet...but a ray of sunshine today.
Backstory. The break up was 100% my fault. That's all I'm going to say. Best of luck to you guys and gals...I wish everyone the best.
If the breakup was your fault it shouldn't be you who does no contact. Coach Lee talked about it. It's the one who is at fault (the dumper or the one who caused the breakup by screwing things up) is now to take action, not go NC. This is at least what I understand from all Lee's movies
Don’t catch your chickens before they hatch brotha… women are going to be women
*count
@Nat Smythe all right, but where is the apology part? If you watched Coach Lee's videos closely in such situations he advises to apologise or show some improvement and THEN go to NC. If it's your fault it's not your exes job to chase you. Lee explained it in videos like 'when NC won't work' etc. It's when the breakup wasn't the dumper's own decision but when it was kind of forced by the dumpee.
@@paulinapoznan8401 Yall can just ask me for details lol. I cried, begged, and apologized. Then went NC.
I ran across Coach Lee's videos while trying to find out what No Contact was all about, after the love of my life told me they were not in love with me and did not want to have a romantic relationship with me, only friendship. I declined that offer and went into No Contact. Coach Lee helped me to understand what I needed to do in my situation. I implemented everything I learned from him and the love of my life reached out to me after one year and six months of No Contact (you read that right, 1.5 years of No Contact) and admitted they are in love with me. We are now on the journey of building a new relationship. As we move forward, I am following Coach Lee's advice on what to do after No Contact. I believe it was by divine providence that I ran across Coach Lee's videos. God bless you, Coach Lee! Thank you!
I didn’t know who this came from but happened upon it. Thank you so much!
any update?
“…..well you’re a lil rusty”
that’s the smoothest line I’ve ever heard a relationship coach say.
Coach Lee a G!
Kinda crazy how the moral of everything coach Lee says is
1. Have value and see yourself as a catch
2. But be a decent person, not a narc or an asshole
Thanks ❤
I love you coach Lee, went through a terrible break up and you saved me. I did everything you said, and we are back together again. Much blessings to you.
Great news, good luck!
How long it took
Happy for both of you!
Oh man. My ex cam back. Declared his undying love for me, kissed me. I did the pull back, he kept reaching out, it was looking good with effort, then he disappeared for a month. Came back, same thing again. Despite me using all of your advice he keeps doing it. Please put a reminder not to let them do it more than 3 times. This is a fun game for people narcissistically abusing others.
I can’t believe how well NC works! I was able to get a guy back by using it. We went NC for close to a month. This guy was super stubborn. I honestly thought there was no chance whatsoever. I left him alone. Didn’t bother him at all. When I ran into him I stayed cool. Didn’t bring anything up. I was friendly and not cold. We ended up having a very calm discussion about everything a few weeks later. I’m so glad I chose this route. I used to beg guys to not leave or to take me back. It never works that way.
That so nice
COACH LEE, SHE REACHED OUT TODAY, I THOUGHT THIS WOULD NOT HAPPEN. Let’s see what happens.
Coach Lee… your timing is impeccable. Just last night (almost exactly when you posted this video) and after 39 days since the breakup and no contact, my ex texted me this extremely long apology. Now I have some direction in how I should respond. I almost feel as if the universe intervened here. You have been my rock throughout this ordeal… I am incredibly grateful for your advice. Thank you!
Update, How did it go?
@@Papa_Send It's possible, but it could be they had a change of heart about their ex. They realize they still love their ex.
How’d it all turn out?
These comments give me good reference to me how she should act to win me back.
After the break up, i did no contact right away, he reached out to me a few times, i stayed calm and casual, let him have the break up. After 3 weeks, he called me and said he missed me, without me, he was missing something, and wanted to get back with me. I take it slowly. Thank you very much Coach Lee, i am stronger and better now.
Coach Lee, thanks for the tutorials. I followed them carefully, & after 10 months past break up, we're back together. Thank you once again & above all, glory be to God.
How long was the inital relationship?
@@kaandemirkiran4583 7 months
So the rule is:
"Reservation, not rejection."
The NO CONTACT works! In my case she only wants to be friends. Guess what I did? I'm now back to NO CONTACT! Coach Lee is a genius, great video.
It's been two months for me. I'm focusing more on myself-diet, exercise, and therapy twice weekly. The worst is behind me now as far as emotions. I learned that if someone walks out of my life, I must let them GO! Getting on with my life was the best decision I have ever made. I'm glad we're not and never will be, together in any way. We were wrong for each other.
Update: It’s been seven months now. Since my last post, I’ve donated everything he left behind and burned all the cards and letters he had ever sent.
Broke up 8 months ago watched just about every video fast forward 8 months later we’re back and better than ever.
Congrats
Love reading comments like this
How long no contact have you done ? Tell us more :)
I’m a client of coach Ken’s. I truly love that guy like a brother.
My ex reached out last week after 4 months (to the day) of no contact. I’ve been running straight out of the Coach Ken & Lee Playbook. It has worked like a charm. She temperature checked me last week; casual, warm, friendly and reserved. I’m not chasing. She has enough now to know she won’t be rejected, but she has to take steps toward me.
Coaches Lee and Ken. They know what they are doing. Listen to them and follow their advice.
Thats awesome. Im in the exact same time frame. Im a client of Coach Rex. My situation is more complex though. I broke up with her. I did not want too and I do regret it. Im willing to work on it if she is. She lives next door to me and her 17 yr old still lives with me. I hope to have positive results one day. She is still ignoring me but I feel that will change.
@@Kay-zu5xd coming up on 15 months. I was going to propose at 18. She’s a borderline personality. She freaked out as soon as she realized I was serious about wanting to marry her. Classic BPD behavior. Seriously. Book a call with coach Ken. He knows his stuff on this and can give you good advice. There are a lot of terrible relationship coaches on TH-cam. Lee and Ken are the real deal.
What do you do when your ex posts pictures on social media? Do you like them or watch their stories? I didnt watch or like any of their posts since no contact
@@righteeeyeh stay off their social media period. Don’t react or watch stories. Don’t even look.
How's that going now?
Trust this guy he’s the real deal I got my ex I’m still sub after years only to support. Only TH-camr I follow I check almost all before finding him
My ex reached out on day 4 of no-contact. Other coaches would say I gave in too easily. To make the long story short, we are now married.
@@rdsieben what was it they said? I started no contact a little over a week ago, three days after my ex officially broke up with me after taking some time away to think over things in her head. She’s reached out a couple times just saying things like “hope you’re doing okay today” two days after I stopped messaging her. Then a couple days ago she said “I hope you have a great day today” both times we had a short conversation just saying I’m doing good and some of the things I’ve been doing and how school is going for her. Don’t know how to take this since it’s only been a couple weeks since she first told me she wasn’t sure if she wanted our relationship
are you with your ex still?
@@thatboywiththefez I would have ignored those responses. She's looking for validation. Just keep ignoring "I hope you are okay" type responses until she says something significant like mine did after four days.
@@rgue5509 we were married two months ago
coach lee, i love and appreciate your work so much, seriously. i went for NC for 2-3 months, and now my ex is starting to make moves; however, I'm still staying distant. everything lee says is true fellas
Seeing updates like these really helps guys like me keep hope kindled. Happy for u
@@waldthegoonie3145 For real a lot of hope being shown in the comments.
@bbc20231 yeah no joke lol. I wish it to keep going for all that deserve it
Any update?
@@Samx838 hey, yes! long story short, my ex kept inviting me to hang out and wanting to get back together. however, after some deep self reflections I realized that I've outgrown this relationship and don't feel the same about the person. I told him that and he left the country, but still kept stalking my social media. I was happy than ever to let that person go myself.
So everything will be alright, don't worry.
Coach Lee, we met up by chance and she pretty much begged for a second chance. She said she never lost feelings and lied about why she left we made love and had a wonderful time. I gave her the second chance she asked for, then a month later she changed her mind.
This is what i love about coach Lee. So precise and so clear in explaining. That’s why i also want to rewatch all his videos if i am free, cause it is so refreshing also and regaining my strength, he has that kind of power. Thank you, Coach. 💕
After my ex broke up with me in a moment of anger almost one year ago, he kept reaching out regularly. The reason he did that was because he wanted to check if I would stil accept his terms and conditions to get married. Two weeks ago I told him that I still dont accept his conditions, he blamed me that I am the one who changed and he does not want to change, and he thought I was open to sleep with him while our status was unresolved. I think I dodged a huge lethal bullet with this one.
Coach Lee, Your advice is top notch and it works! I was just contacted by my ex when it appeared there was no hope. I now know how to proceed. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!
He contacted me the day before you posted this video. Thankfully I have watched all your video's and knew what to do.
I responded back to him in a friendly manner, did not ignore him. Kept the conversation light, happy, positive and friendly.
This happened on a Friday evening so that makes me think he may have just been curious if I was on a date or seeing someone.
The next move is his. I am not going to reach out to him unless he contacts me. The break up was what he thought he wanted so I gave it to him. I have followed your advice for the past three years with this off and on, in and out, hot and cold guy who can't seem to get his shit together. We're friends and that's the way it is. I'm happy in my life with or without him.
How long was your no contact?
@@danielbrown8602 I went no -contact for six months before he reached out to me.
@@pamelawright3253 I feel 6 months will kill me.
He has been stringing me along for four years. I gave up on him only contacting me when he was needing attention or his ego boosted. He didn't want me but was afraid I'd find someone else. I finally got to the point I had to close the door on any thoughts of us seeing each other again. I was totally getting him out of my system when suddenly he contacted me after my last text to him six months ago. I have no idea where things will go from here but I'll be fine no matter what. The next move is his, he can either take or disappear again. Nothing he does surprises,me anymore, infact....it's gotten very routine and BORING.
@@pamelawright3253 I just need to get to the point where I don't want her. Until then I hurt everyday.
You are helping me to keep my girlfriend since 2018,even i had knowleg before with women but you made me realise that i was blind. Thank you so much lee.
Anyone who is here I promise it will get better. I’m on day 3 haven’t been able to eat much but I started the no contact rule today and I’ll keep you updated
I did no contact,after a week,he reached out,I replied,then he disappeared,I feel like he's breadcrumbling me,am feeding his ego,it's frustrating,I think if someone decides that they're done with you the best thing you can do for them is to accept that their love was never yours,I am ready to move on,I always try to move on but it's like he senses it and comes back,'hope is a very dangerous thing' I hope he never reaches out again,i understand now when people say you can love someone but still choose to let them go.i want to heal now,please let me heal.
I‘m 1 month shy of 1 full year of breakup. Had contact once where she texted me for my birthday about 4 months after the breakup. It was a fun and light conversation. Otherwise it was NC. Now I‘m meeting someone else. It does work out in the end, but not always with your ex :)
This is great. My ex contacted me after one and a half months of my going no contact. So this is excellent advice. Some of it I had already determined, but a lot of it I hadn't really thought of. So thanks for the great advice on how I must approach his contacting me. I have never allowed the breakup to cramp my style socially and have kept myself open to finding someone new....no way any man will every cramp my style. I will say this however, he will find a totally different me when he eventually fully connects with me......quite frankly I don't know if I even want him back...but will keep an open mind....all that time away really gave me time to examine who he really is.. the distance gave me clarity....You rock Coach Lee!! Luv ya.
Hi coach lee. I have learned so much from you and it is helping with my current break-up. The one thing that resonates most with me is when you talk about “giving them the break-up”. I have had some time and reflection on this (I am also a paying member of the emergency break-up kit) I believe it it also important to add that we don’t only need to give “them” the break-up, but to give ourselves the break-up. I’m still learning and find huge value in all your knowledge and wisdom. Keep doing what you are doing. We are all growing
Day 5 of no contact and quite frankly, I don't want her back. There is a part of me that wants her to grieve the loss dearly so she learns not to take someone else for granted in the future.
This guy is a genius. I gave taken all his advice. And my post break-up has been going really well.
Memories of treating her like no one else would or could and no contact that’s all I need😁
Your videos have helped me so much Coach Lee! I have been the needy ex too many times. Your words have a way of comforting me and making me strong. Many thanks!
I am done with the emergency kit it’s a powerful one too💜 it’s a must have for all women even do they not experiencing break up, but well prepared in the future in case thanks again men of wisdom 😍
I got the emergency kit, but I guess I expected more. I saw the videos. Is there something more? Something I missed?
@@soio9879 I just got it also. Kinda wish I got the married one. Being I have two young kids with her
Hey coach Lee, it's been a while since I've seen one of your videos. Me and my ex encountered each other at the gym yesterday and we talked for 2 hours. I kept myself together and kept the conversation light hearted. She kept offering to help me out whenever I needed tips on lifting weights and whatnot and even offered to sell me her car. We caught up a lot, she told me I looked good and that I was doing a great job and that I looked thinner. I was very honest with how everything was, I never brought up the break up, but she actually did once we talked how I was hoping she wouldn't blow me off when I approached her (jokingly) and she said she thought enough time has passed by for her to talk to me and honestly everything ended on a good note, she gave me 3 side hugs within those two hours. I'm just commenting because I'm not sure what to do from here other than just keep doing on what I'm doing and work on myself. I'm not really trying to get her back, but it'd be nice to know that there's still a chance down the road.
Wooow dude i wish :/
@Estevan O. How long have you all been split up?
@@jessicadavis4163 Bout 8 months, this girl hates me told me to never contact her ever again and she was the one badmouthing me.
@@jessicadavis4163 I was with this girl for almost 6 years, but half way through the relationship she kinda did me dirty (she didn't cheat but it felt very similar) and I was very bitter and I couldn't love her with my full potential because I felt betrayed by the one person I truly wanted to grow with
@@stargazer19969 My ex did those same things to me but we weren’t broken up that long. He cheated on me and did me extremelllyyyyyy dirty, so I completely understand. Why I still haven’t completely left the guy after all the horrendous things he’s done to me, I truly have no idea. If anyone heard what he’s done to me, everyone would tell me to run! I mean, if you’re okay not being with her, then just keep working on you! You seem like you’re in a really great spot physically and mentally. That’s amazing!
hahah in awe right now with how my life circumstances turned out with her chasing me now and before i was simping for her will smith style but still skeptical to let her back into my life. i feel reserved but not rejecting her. also i met some other girl, but shes graduating/leaving school soon so its intersting how the cards are unfolding. appreciate it coach lee.
Will Smith style 😂😂
My situation is so of the grid I'm literally so lost at this point.
To break it down as simple as I can
1. She broke up with me (It happened cause of me, I didn't have emotional control in many cases, I said things I shouldn't have said) and she said she need time and space to heal herself.
2. We have dogs together (it's hard to do no contact when I almost need to at some points)
3. After about a week we had a very civil conversation and I explained to her I understand why she did it (to save the relationship basically) cause I was treating her poorly. She was glad to hear I actually had the time to self reflect about what happen and how I'm improving.
4. I caught her lying about having plans to avoid me (it's a super long story, she said she didn't want to hurt my feelings cause I asked her to go mini golfing) but we had a very long and civil talk about that aswell.
5. We have had sex 3 times now
I don't know if this is good or bad, each time we do it, it just feels so euphoric, not even the sex but just the mind connection we both have during it. It's so hard to explain.
But I don't know if I should continue it, it's not like we have planned any of it. But the times we have seen each other it's like it uncontrollable.
I guess my concern is, I feel like we are rebuilding a new bond again with doing it, but at the same time I don't know if giving her the opportunity to have sex with me while not in a relationship is doing more harm than good.
UPDATE: just want to give hope to people, after making it very clear that I wasn't coming back, that's when the tables turned, we are now back together and are very happy! So just don't give up and what you believe is right.
I had an ex tell me, "I'm sorry I hurt you." I just smiled & said "I know." I turned & walked away. That was 10 yrs. ago. 😁
Lol why did you do that, what the hell did they do
Any update? Has the ex reached out yet? Hahaha
Hi coach lee. It is been 3 months since I have been doing no contact, and yes, I want to thank you for making me so strong I owe my strength to you. He first started reaching out through text and I calls I had to change my number, then he started emailing me every week. He emailed me a beautiful poem about me and all my traits and it made me cry. But I dont want to get back with him because he is toxic and I am trying to stay strong and move on, also one of my coworkers told me she had seen him with another girl walking down the street, which why I choose to stay firm and strong in no contact. I will move on.
I’m confused. Why do you consider yourself in no contact? You claim you don’t want the person back… but, … and, yet… you are here on a forum designed to help us learn the things we need to do to “get our ex back”?
You are confusing. Do you even know what you want?
@@tooxlent Thomas, have you been following Coach Lee? If not, when you are in NO CONTACT after a breakup, it gives YOU time to think about what YOU want to do. If she broke up with you, it's up to HER to call you. If you broke up with her, then you would be the one to call her. The no contact gives you time to think about what you want to say and do. It makes sense bcse it helps you reflect on the relationship too. Think about it...Good luck to you always..
@@jannlewandowski5540 So, she wanted him back, then she decided she didn't want him back because he was "toxic", even though, he reached out to her. obviously multiple times, and was rejected, so, he went out with another girl. And now she wants to shame him, and stay permanently broke up with him? You do realize, he reached out. obviously more than one time. She was getting what she wanted, which was to have him come back to her, and yet, she blew him off, and so he began the process of moving on, and now she wants to say that it is his fault, that he was toxic, that he's a dick, and that she needs to stay in no contact, and never talk to hime again? No contact worked. it got him to contact her. The fact that SHE ignored him makes this her fault. She's the bad one. She's toxic. I mean no contact worked, it got him to want her back, she blew this. It was not him. she had her chance.
Coming up on 30 days of NC after a 4.5 year relationship, it's been so hard. I still havent lost hope that my ex will change his mind. It's tough watching so many of these videos that prep you for "how to respond when your ex comes back" and the signs, because I haven't seen any of these yet. I moved back to my hometown after the breakup, he doesn't do social media and also has a lot to keep him busy with work, so part of me feels I will never see or hear from him again, but I can't let go. I'm feeling proud of the progress I've made and how I am still enjoying the life I worked hard to build, but that hope is both a thorn in my side and a lullaby at night.
It's tough, but over time it will get easier. The fact you're working on yourself and building your future is a great sign of improvement, so be proud of that 🙂 by the time they do contact you, you may have moved on
@@jetfire931 ^ this right here.
Feeling, and did, exactly the same!😔
Update?
@@Camcam75 it's been > 1 year NC. I let him go. Life moved on, and I guess I have but haven't at the same time. I tried dating again and it went awfully. I'm still broken. I never heard anything about his life afterwards, and I hope I never do. Sorry for the crap update 🥴
If my ex kissed me after the breakup as a bid to reconnect, I’d probably just grab that ass and make the connection.
Thank you coach Lee, I am sooo happy I found you during that hard period of my life. You've been so helpful. I listened to your advice during the no contanct and after my ex contacted me and we are now back together.
Thanks alot Coach 61days of no contact and she reaches out
Thank you coach Lee you have been right about everything. My ex and I broke up in September but have been on and off the whole time. I guess I started rushing her back into things and she said she wanted space for her last month at the college we both go to. 3 weeks went by and she reached out. We are still not talking but letting her do her thing is working. Your videos keep me disciplined and I appreciate you for taking the time to make these.
You are watching this video because you don’t have a choice !!! I know how much you want your partner to be with you or to make him or her to fall in love with you again !! If it’s meant to be , it will be !!! Only time will heal !!! Trust me!!!
My ex contacted me yesterday after a few weeks of no contact. It didn't feel right to ignore him, as I know him well enough to know it took a lot of thinking on his part to actually do so, so I am happy I found this video.
They may be keeping you in the friend zone. They may be having problems with their rebound and are throwing you breadcrumbs.
My ex recently reached out (first since our last contact which was 4 months ago). I had the sense that he was a tad bit nervous, and I made the mistake of cracking a few too many jokes. I sent him a msg saying that I appreciated him reaching out, and I wanted him to know that I had no hard feelings towards him, and only see him in good light because he's a good person. He responded back saying "Awesome, thank you so much. You've helped build up my confidence, appreciate it." I didn't quite understand his response and left it as a joke and went with I am dope lol, and I know that he is working on himself and that's great. I didn't understand his confidence comment.
I hope I can come back to this comment I’m posting to say this truly works. I’m currently on 10 days of no contact. I’m hurting pretty bad as I miss her so much. But I really need to shift my focus on myself for now.
After 3 weeks NC, he texted me twice then called me and did normal small talk and invited me over for dinner and movie. I said, no its late thanks i work tomorrow. Said gn to each other. The next day he sent a few flirty texts and thats it so far. I kept it short and sweet. Im gonna keep strong and stay NC unless he does the work. Seems this is the beginning, lets see what happens.
It's been six months since we broke up and 4 months NC after a 3-year stable relationship. I've been working on myself (exercising, focusing on my work, going out w/ friends, volunteering, even thinking of starting a business) and when I thought I was okay, I saw a photo of him w/ his new gf. She met his family and she's now joining family pics. All the pain came rushing back. I guess there had always been a tiny flicker of hope we'd get back together eventually but it looks like he has moved on. It looks like it's serious & not just a rebound. At this point, I just really want the pain and longing to end. It's excruciating to see the person you love go love someone else.
Joining family pics persay does not really mean much. Remember that Divorced couples joined pics as well. The truth is that most boyfriend girlfriend relationships fell anyway even if it’s not a rebound relationship because the foundation is usually not solid. That being said, all you have to do is focus on shining and being the best version of you. For the summer, just say to yourself I’m gonna use it to be the best me. You can not be resisted if your are the best version of you. You cannot stop the sun from shining right… Shine ✨
Just remember that he did not value you enough to keep you in his life. Be insulted by that. Find a new man and you'll feel great. Seek an upgrade!
@@timsimon8995this is such a good advice. I always visualize myself being together with them but when you remember the disrespect that will make you think otherwise
@freakynikki08 I'm sure by now, which is a year after you wrote this comment, you feel much better, maybe you have found someone else! maybe you got back with your ex, who knows?...
but it doesn't hurt as much anymore,doest it? life goes on... and it's too short and too valuable to be wasted thinking about and hurting over someone who doesn't deserve you...
If you're looking on his socials, it really wasn't no contact. True no contact means: do not let your ex be any part of your life. Move on, focus on yourself and new endeavours. 6 months should potentially be enough time to heal and grow as a person so that it doesn't matter anymore even if you bumped into your ex and his new gf on the street or wherever. Remove this man out of your life completely and focus your energy on better things.
Hi Coach Lee, my ex and I are back together!! After the break up, my gf suggested I watch your videos bc they helped her. I want to tysm for all of your help! You kept me strong throughout it all. I hope this comment gives someone support and faith that it really is possible xx
The point of an ex is an ex ….silent is the best response. Why would anyone want to reopen old wounds just to see if it heals again .
Absolute nonsense
It’s been about a month for me and it’s hard. The past couple of days I’ve been super depressed and crying. I want to reach out so bad but I know that it won’t change anything. I miss him so much
My ex sent back my jacket and shirt back in the post yesterday with a note asking me how I was and asking how my mother was. after being broken up 5 weeks . We are 2 weeks in no contact.
I replied later last night in a calm and assured way and I let the conversation fade after a positive interaction. I let her be the last to text. I’m back into no contact now again. Looks like her interest is going up coach Lee. 👍
My ex reached out to me after 4 weeks of no contact after i begged and pleaded. I even got myself blocked due to the chasing and begging. Wish i would have found these videos before that. She sent me some pictures from her trip and asked how am i doing. She has been silent the past few days after that. But this finally feels like a step to the right direction.
Update: Few days ago she started to text me a lot and i ended up spending couple of nights at her place. We spent our time doing fun activities and cuddling and kissing. We talked about our relationship and how we can fix things. We decided we're going to take things slow and see how we feel about it. . We text every day but take some alone time too to see how were feeling. So no contact really works even tho it feels like a living hell. She told me she was very worried that i move on and couldn't bear the thought of it. Right now i am over the moon and this feels like a new beginning. Thank you Coach Lee for giving me the strength to trust the process! I owe you big time.
@@miiiq782 any new updates?
How long were you guys tigether
@@corinachorak3597 good question. Update?
finally from 3 months i just got a message from my ex ....just in time watching this ...i guess my first step is to stay cool and just accept his apololgy...
Congrats.
update?
🙏Thank u coach, your videos calm Me even though I'm sure it's over forever they still give me some hope ... my 6 months relationship was over... it was perfect but it was over deu to religious cause from them.. i did alot of mistakes like begging and raging for 3 weeks then did no contact but broke it after 1 month to give them back their stuff and took one of mine and I did sincere apology for my behaviour ... they wished me good luck and I'm still blocked everywhere ... now I'm on day 13 I'm getting stronger with some bad hours
@@nufffalready8266 i stopped watching his videos because I found out I was dating a covert narcissist and not a normal person ... and I found my piece
I’m was doing so well with no contact then they contacted me said they would call me later and didn’t. I’m on no contact again and will not be making any contact until they do. I think they are testing me. Thanks coach lee you really are helping me so much.
they? wtf lol
Your videos are insightful. Some pieces resonate. Others almost feel like games. I’m certain I’m doing everything wrong. And so is he, honestly. He calls everyday. We go on dates. I’ve been too honest. Too forgiving. It’s been pretty painful.
I'd love to just get a text from mine
I think a lot of the time when your ex reaches out, it’s because they are rebounding off of someone they were dating after you and they feel that going back to you is a sure thing to take their minds off of the person they were just seeing.
I said it on the last video (I think) but listen to this man! I got my girl back with his help!
Congrats.
My ex texted me after 8 days. She apologized for being distant. I have a sense that she's been going through a rough time but I still wish she would have leaned on me for support. I need to convey to her that going dark isn't healthy. In this case, I am deferring any judgment because I don't have all the details yet. I will approach it with an open mind.
Hi coach Lee thanks again for this powerful video and also for making me a smart women I was very naive and I’ve been in a manipulative relationship but I feel safe now may ur day be blessed and ur family 💜🙏
My ex reached out,but didn’t apologies, only to say that he wasn’t cheating.. so I didn’t respond
1. If an X reaches out I would say leave it at least 2 days or a week & be casual about the response, ie act unexpected & if she respond back leave your responses minimal so she does the chasing but do it like u met her for the first time!!
2. Like host says...;) if the X Apologies, me personally acknowledge that you didn't like how it went but your cool as it passed tense... this may get the X to pinpoint her part in it which is good & if she does you could elaborate a little more so she knows you saw same thing or maybe a bit more so she knows yes you saw that.. At the same time you not giving impression u lookin to take her back!!!!
Make it sound like you talking about a stranger so it takes away the directness & hopefully gets her to again show you where she went wrong ie she should do most of the talking!!!!
Never tell your X your hurting even if she might see something in your face or body language so obviously tone that down keep a stowic look but try to come across like your life is positive & may even brief mention what you doing....but that's it cuz it shows you can move on from she!!!! Especially if you know your X has not improved her life for whatever reason she knows herself, hence coming knock back on your door so to speak!!!!
If you show your hurt, a females biological attraction will switch off & she will just repeat same behaviour & ghost you!!!!
Because of a female narsastic biological tendencies, my host is 100% right!!!
3. Like host states your X tries to make a move. ...you should move back from a kiss, or if the hug is strangling you. Pull back some so she knows it ain't as easy as that which should also back up points 1 & 2.
Even if she wants to get back. you let them know right about now the answers NO. You don't need to be toxic about it but a casual NO cuz this also reiterates what you've been saying since she got back in contact with YOU!!
If you do kiss her or she hugs keep it brief on the kiss & slightly pull away drop your arms slowly so she senses the pull back.
Now if your a guy who works out she's gonna feel & see that manly strength in you & she's gonna miss that!!!!!!!
Meaning you are your own security out or at home
You got your own place & can move your life forward & without her so she can clearly see. without you evening saying anything!!!!
Gives her something to fight for
Creates sexual tension
She reiterates specifics in herself so you may see she understanding her own nonsense
She gains respect for u
She looks at you like a female should for the guy she wants
She also show submissiveness
She gets that feeling back that you may have had b4
Like my host says you could be a little bit playful but switch that off like it never happened but guess what she saw it!!!!
You could even if lets say your having dinner or bar & her hair is in the way of her eye, you could reach over move her hair out the way but keep your cool as this will confuse her but interest her same time but also adds a smigen of sexual tension.
4. Like host says about X contacting you regularly.... Don't forget your busy in your own endeavours, don't respond too soon, leave it few hours or all day as you at work but be brief still go on like that was the first contact. Keep doing this over a period of weeks maybe but if she contacts you everyday, no you don't need to be getting into no full blown chit chat & your busy so you let her know when you get chance cuz at work you will response once you've finished whatever it is your doin or even you go gym Mon. Wed & Fri so after the gym you will respond.
She may even ask to come along if you know she a gym goer but that's where you will be so she knows but don't be arranging this. If she wants to go their when your there then she can if she wants but if it turns out she never came. don't be texting asking. Carryon your day to day routine & let her bring up why she never came but have no opinion about it. Now she knows part of what you do!!!
She may even ask if your seeing anyone & you could say yeh you see people now & then or even your supposed to go on a date but right about now it kinda friends as your just sering how you & her may click or not.... This may add some jealousy which is good!!!
In some cases if she knows the day of the date. She's gonna text you how it's going, but don't text her back until maybe the next day so the X thinks did he sleep with her, have they bonded meaning she might not get you back. Even if no date make out like u r but one word type answer do its not obvious you trying to make her jealous or play games!!!!!
If she refers to you as her boyfriend ie the X you can give her a look if people are around or if just you & her you can say "I don't know about that right now" but keep it cool as if to say she reads she got to put in the work!
5. The host mentions if your X talks about a future with you - well throughout points 1-4 your life should already have a plan which shows her you have your own future clearly but now she trying to join in on that, well ok just keep doing what your doing through points 1-4 & just say we will see but your not gonna promise anything & just run with that until you think you can see potential but meanwhile keep on your focus, with work. Your business. Gym etc & keep texts at a minimum cuz you have this life without her & what she's gonna want to do is meet up so you can have 1 on 1, so I it's a case of keep it cool may even go on another date with thd previous potential new female but after that don't bring it up again because if one night you don't respond your X is gonn b thinking is he with this new female whose gonna want to see more of him & she's brand new !!!
It's all guess work & always be willing to lose her again if she shows signs of previous nonsense she showed b4!!!!
Keep up your mission goals etc throughout even if you get back with her but always keep in your mind it could be another breakup but if it does, let her go & be on your mission so she now knows moving forward!!!!!!!
All in all good advice from this HOST.. on point!!!!! :)
I got my ex back after 1 month and 1 week away 😩😩😩I am soo happy after no contact she agreed that she was angry for 2 weeks after that she started to remembering me my good stuff she said I love u I couldn’t even do anything I just wanted u back after I was blocked guys remember I dint give her much time when we got back but I spoke normal not as friend nor as lover just normal after 3 days we got back follow this 🥂🥂🥂🥂thank u thank u
Soo after she contacted you , you never contacted her back?
And you let her initiate the contact each time?
@@thehavoc6331 no we started talking and she told me that I never found anyone like u now it’s 3 months we are back and woow she is soo good with me she is acting like how I was before if I reply little late she thinks she will lose me she does what ever I love man it’s good
@@armanthegreat5554 was she the one who started the conversation most of the time??
Or you reached out to her as well?
@@armanthegreat5554 that's great to hear that mate!! The relationship bond usually becomes stronger after breakup
I hope you guys the best future ahead together ❤️💪
@@thehavoc6331 ya bro it does 👌
This is do helpfully &indeed he came back still in process . Thank u
Hello coach Lee my ex just contacted me earlier after 7 months of no contact. So, I'm back here again watching this video from you. You're a blessing! Anyways, I no longer have the urge to want him back. I've learned a lot and I am now happy without him but still want to watch this video to know more tips. Thanks again.
Have lived what this man says trust me listen to him..
Coach this is actually very important. Your teaching us to stay in no contact that puts us in such a negative victim state. Actually we are empowered like a excellent chess player we KNOW its Their Move is a Better Way to phrase /frame it. This Puts Us in Total POWER. No stress of fear of needing them to make their Move. We are Freed by the Notion that we KNOW DAMNED GOOD and well from your Coaching us that IT"S THEIR MOVE. Staying in no contact is a horrible way to frame it. Its causing needless turmoil and we are shooting ourseleves in the foot just as a concept it needs to change.
Ex reached out to me 5 weeks later. Hug and kiss me but i played it cool. Never asked her to come back anymore
I love you Coach Lee your videos helped me get my ex back 🥺
Coach Lee 🥰 It doesn't help to not be communicating , in with that person's personality, to work WITH not against them 🥰
When they are reaching out, yes.
@@RealCoachLee Coach Lee 🥰, I am a person of habit to do this important text to him once a week for the year we have known each other , it's not romantic or related at all to me , I still wish him for Shabbos 🙏🔯 because if I didn't this would be bad and he will notice , so no contact at all is not something I can do. . . And we still meet but are friends
This advice is all spot on! I agree with everything you suggest -
My only issue with the whole thing is a feeling of resentment towards the person that it took my absence for them to see my value. I'm not sure whether I'd want to be with someone who could drop me. Surely that's a secure response? I find a lot of advice a little conflicting. I understand if the dumpee cheated or was neglectful, but simply an issue of attraction? I'm not sure I want to play an uncertain dance for the rest of my life when really, it'd be nice to be able to genuine without fear of them leaving. It's a funny one!
My question I suppose is, should you take someone back who rejected you? When you didn't do anything specifically wrong? Even if you miss them, what would that say about me? If my authentic self isn't good enough, why bother 🤷♀️
That's always going to be up to the individual to decide. In my case, we had unresolved trauma but really loved each other. We broke up, both improved and healed... Now I want her back.
In your case? You have to look inside and see if you can believe they can come back for the right reasons or not. Take it slow if they do come back and investigate that question seriously. If they just aren't that interested, and that won't change, sure. If they made a mistake you can understand and forgive if they acknowledge, then it's up to you.
Just let it go
I absolutely love hearing you spread wisdom and whit!
My ex contacted me after around 6 weeks apart. The initial conversations were good. But then it became clear she was simply getting in touch to tell me about herself, and showing absolutely no intrest in me at all. It was all about her, and he college stuff and I'm convinced she wanted validation, nothing more.
I called her out on it (politely) by simply saying she would have found it impolite if roles had been reversed. Haven't heard from her since. Been just over a month. If I'm honest, though. Perhaps breaking up was for the best. Frees me up to find someone who truly values us as a couple and will put in the work. No Contact DOES work though!
he made a move, flirted with me, missed me, but he still says he's trying to work things out with his rebound. he was candid enough to tell me that what he needs (company, physical touch) his rebound can't give bec they are doing LDR. it's like he still doesn't get it.
Wow.. That's exactly what my Ex did, gave me Breadcrumbs. He says he wants to see where it goes with the Rebound. The dumbest thing ever. I hope it blows up in his face.
Any Updates?
Day 24 of NC , feel better , less hurt and it’s all coz of Coach Lee videos 😊 thanks a lot Coach
Hi Coach Lee. Love your videos! Would you consider putting up a video about 'when your ex leaves you for someone else' and the best plan of action to get them back if its a limerence type of situation? Thank you!
Yeah i’d love to hear about Coach’s Lee opinion on this topic. He never talks about it
If someone leaves you for someone else never look back.
@@DianaVanessaful Coach Lee has a FULL VIDEO on LIMERENCE...I saw it twice. Check out his Library. You will find it in there.
Your brain is a blessed one Sir ✊
My ex broke up with me and reached out a few months later saying he misses me and apologizing. He didn't say he wanted to get back together though, he said that the past is in the past... I told him I have accepted the break up and that I intend to move on and it has now 1 month of radio silence. I do wish to get back with him but I am afraid I have messed things up and there is no chance now. That he is happier without me... Was this then the only stage of 'reaching out'?
UPDATE 1: So he wrote to me weeks later again about how much he missed me and wants to be with me but wants to move on. What the hell is that supposed to mean? I am going to do nothing about it.
UPDATE 2: I don't want him back anymore:) (7 months later after a 4y relationship)
I hope it helps someone to see how desperate I was first but am doing much better!!
Update?
@@brandonnykyforak yeah, reached out a third time. He was curious about how I was doing, told me he missed me but doesn't want to get back together and wants to stay in touch, I said no I can't, I will move on now. The old me would have continued to talk, but I am so much stronger. I know he will reach out again, and again because that's how he is. But no contact made me find myself and I don't want him anymore. What's your situation?
@@tiffanypr.9448update?
My ex really meant a lot to me. after 8 years, lived together, grow up together, have 2 dogs together and engagement, she broke up with me right when I got a promotion and planning to move to a new city with her... It was rough to go through this then move to a place I know no one, so I begged and maintained contact with her for entire year, suggested getting back together multiple times and got rejected. Thank god I come across your videos Coach Lee, I started no contact 2 weeks ago, and I watch your video daily to stay strong for my own sake and as a last effort to see if there are any chance for us. She started reached out, said "I miss you", "how are you doing" and react to my social media posts, I am taking your lessons and approaching everything slowly. Your videos are underrated, thank you for making them.
I think I'll forever thankful for this video.
“Well you’re a little rusty” is so cold lmao
thanx for your support..
Hey bro so my ex totally cut me out 1 month ago, just didn’t want to talk then forget about me, I had 1 week hard aniexty, went no contact , total no contact, watched your videos daily, weathered the emotional roller coaster, after 4 weeks, she contacted me, I was surprised how unfazed I was by her contacting me, I got back on my mission in them 4 weeks, don’t know if I want to get back with her now tbh, getting back on my mission was empowering and only through no contact could I do this, your vids are great, helping so many people like myself in very stressful times, god bless ya man, hope u see this comment, keep the videos going and also anyone reading this, no contact is legit ✌🏻
I actually reached out to my ex. It’s been a year since the breakup. He responded right away. All positive and kept asking questions. I was kind but kept it short. He brought up that a new season of show we watched together came out .. even responded to something we talked the next morning. Soo what now? I honestly feel I should do nothing now. Just wait and see?!?!
Update?
2 years but still not back but i am jobless and sick
Thank you so much for helping me hold my boundaries in place
My ex reached out after about 5 days of no contact. She brought me some things from a favorite store of ours, brought me breakfast to my house the next day and hungout, then dinner two more nights in a row. Shes had a rough week. So I was there to help her relax. I didn't get my hopes up during that time. But After i got home after the last dinner, i recieved a text from her stating she feels she should give me space, that its been unfair of her to lean on my comfort and affection when its convenient for her when shes asked for space. She felt like she was taking me for granted she said. Especially since she is still unsure if she wants to try us again. So, i told I didn't think she was, but I will respect her space. Im struggling though how to interpret it all. And now, back into no contact. Am I back at square one now??
Thank you for another great video!
Nine weeks broken up,one month no contact and I’ve broken NC. She still has some personal stuff and owes me money. Yeah this could get ugly. I am keeping it casual and polite. Personally I want closure with her on this part. The rest can come later.
ROLLO TOMASSI= If you throw out the trash you a wise man, you don't go back and look at it again.
Yeahhh the rule about "be nice to your ex and don't make them feel bad for how they treated you" (paraphrased) is a dealbreaker. At no point am I willing to suppress my anger and other feelings about the way he treated me on the way out, nor am I willing to let him off the hook for owning up to it and making it right. If THAT'S what I'd have to do to get him back, then I don't want him. "Your ex is cold and mean because they're not attracted to you anymore" is not an acceptable excuse for the behavior. I know what I deserve, and I'll find it with someone else.
It's not you it just your turn💊💊💊
Outstanding work my man
Outstanding