Not a parent, but a former Nanny and infinite Auntie. Thank you for holding this space! Devices aren't the issue. Creating balance with all your resources is the key! 🙏🔯🙏
Parent of 5 and 3 yo boys, and I needed this. I had never thought about the different facets of how to use screens in this light, and it’s bringing me some clarity and direction. Love the three points, I might just print them out and laminate them in several areas of our house 😂. Love the intentionality of it all! Thank you Mrs. K!
Hey here from Germany. I am 44, my kids are 3 and 1,5 yo. I saw few of your videos. My 3yo changed the kindergarden in September. It would be too long to explained here why. But he was a very quiet and good baby. He slept a lot and has a calm character. Always in a good mood. No anger etc. My husbands at the military. So I am with my kids most time alone. I had a traumatic situation 2 years ago. That’s still in me everyday of my life. So my 3yo walked „late“ (from statistic) and also spoke late. He is not that kind of person that goes to other children. If there are too many children at the playground he frozes and just observe. He was always like giving up on activities if it’s not working right away. Putting two toys together or put a toy in a small container. Sometimes he asked for help before even tried it. We were sick constantly since he was in kindergarden. So you can imagine how I felt and feel. This year from January til may I had 7 influenza/sick/cough. And I was alone. Plus my baby/1yo. I slept not good and also had to care of my sick children at night. Fir month. So my nerves are … well down. I hope you understand my English. So my 3yo started to stutter at may. Stutter is in my family. I quit screentime to zero for him. He watched often 10-15 minutes at the time I made dinner. So I can do my work. Heating the food or cook. After your videos specially the ADHD one I ask my self few questions. Of course he is 3. He doesn’t want to change the diaper. No Change clothes in the morning. No put on shoes or jacket. No want to leave the house. Then in ALL of this my 1yo. I started to get angry more often. Yelling more often. My 1yo is crying or pulling my pullover or hitting me while I want to change my older son’s clothes. These situations. I started to throw my son’s toys out of the room if I get angry because he is throwing his toys. Absolutely dumm, I do the same as he. I hate my self for my impatience. I am a calm and quiet person. Until I get to that point I try everything. Get down to his level. Speak calm. Offer hugs or conversations etc. but there’s I point when I am sick, exhausted, with fever and cough and and and I start to raise my voice. My words stay respectful the same but louder. At a point I grab his arm or hand and pull him gently to the room for shoes outside or jacket. It’s trrrible for me. Now since few weeks he started to get angry very quick. Big emotions. This emotion he canalised to his brother. Hitting pushing yelling screaming, taking away toys although he will not play with it. He slept in his room for a bit over a year. Since two weeks in my bed again. He is afraid a Dino could grab him. Even with lights on etc. and my 1yo needs less sleep so he wakes up earlier and my 3yo is awake too. Although he would sleep longer. It’s circle. Less sleep, the age 3, I am sick as he is, my inner anger about my trauma. Etc I saw the ADHD video and find him and me in the situation. I always have a feeling that something is wrong. And I feel guilty. I don’t know how to respond to a child laying in the floor not moving. Or constantly running away and hide for each sock, shirts, underwear. It’s frustrating. Plus the 1yo. How to deal with the stress. I want to give him time with me alone. Mommy time. But impossible. You said you put your daughter for a nap with such angry and weirded behaviour. I will try this. I have a feeling he needs sleep. He stopped napping 3 months ago. Because he slept at around 9-9.30pm How long does your daughter nap? Because sometimes it could be worst after a nap. He wants to sleep longer. Sorry for the long text. But I never searched for such videos. Just stumbled across this. Greetings from Germany 🇩🇪 Jana
Is there any impact on stutter with screentime? And it’s calm videos, short episodes. Of course he wants to watch dinos or more exciting episodes with cars and whatever. But I let him watch only very specific things. Not emotionally overwhelmed tv. It is Bobo Siebenschläfer or Conny. He wants to watch cars. But I do not let him. He did some in the past. But I think it is too much.
I heard doctor K say that it is best to let your kids watch long format content when they are allowed to watch screen. So the attention span gets trained. Of course he uses better words to explain this. But the shorter films/ videos are addictive. I do not know where the line is. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 30, I don't know. But a movie of 90 minutes is preferred I guess. And check in every 30 minutes if he/ she/ they are still enjoying it or if they have the desire to do something else. En also ask this after 30 minutes when they are doing something else. Though that is more a guideline. Not a rule. My twin girls are now 3.5 years old. And the are really in the testing boundaries phase. Not to hurt my feelings or to anger me. They don't know what their actions will result in unless I say something and really fallow through. And then they will learn. Sometimes they seem to understand it and still test if they can get away with it. It's just natural behavior. And it's up to us parents to not take it personally. And steer them in the right direction. Which indeed is really challenging when they test your patience. About your 3 year old not playing with other kids. Don't know could be so many reasons. Best to discuss this with a professional health care person i think.
Without knowing specifics, I would start with asking the teachers if it’s possible to have some of the assignments offline. I’d also keep some perspective - kids goof off during school. It’s normal and good for their development in a different way. If he’s on top of his schoolwork and responsible with his devices at home, I’d not worry but keep an eye out. If schoolwork isn’t where you think he could be or home device use is getting out of hand, I’d start there. Thanks for the question! KK
Not a parent, but a former Nanny and infinite Auntie. Thank you for holding this space! Devices aren't the issue. Creating balance with all your resources is the key! 🙏🔯🙏
Parent of 5 and 3 yo boys, and I needed this. I had never thought about the different facets of how to use screens in this light, and it’s bringing me some clarity and direction. Love the three points, I might just print them out and laminate them in several areas of our house 😂. Love the intentionality of it all! Thank you Mrs. K!
Thank you for this video ❤
Hey here from Germany. I am 44, my kids are 3 and 1,5 yo.
I saw few of your videos. My 3yo changed the kindergarden in September.
It would be too long to explained here why. But he was a very quiet and good baby. He slept a lot and has a calm character. Always in a good mood. No anger etc.
My husbands at the military. So I am with my kids most time alone.
I had a traumatic situation 2 years ago. That’s still in me everyday of my life.
So my 3yo walked „late“ (from statistic) and also spoke late. He is not that kind of person that goes to other children. If there are too many children at the playground he frozes and just observe.
He was always like giving up on activities if it’s not working right away. Putting two toys together or put a toy in a small container. Sometimes he asked for help before even tried it.
We were sick constantly since he was in kindergarden. So you can imagine how I felt and feel. This year from January til may I had 7 influenza/sick/cough.
And I was alone. Plus my baby/1yo.
I slept not good and also had to care of my sick children at night. Fir month. So my nerves are … well down. I hope you understand my English.
So my 3yo started to stutter at may. Stutter is in my family. I quit screentime to zero for him. He watched often 10-15 minutes at the time I made dinner. So I can do my work. Heating the food or cook.
After your videos specially the ADHD one I ask my self few questions. Of course he is 3. He doesn’t want to change the diaper. No Change clothes in the morning. No put on shoes or jacket. No want to leave the house.
Then in ALL of this my 1yo. I started to get angry more often. Yelling more often. My 1yo is crying or pulling my pullover or hitting me while I want to change my older son’s clothes. These situations.
I started to throw my son’s toys out of the room if I get angry because he is throwing his toys. Absolutely dumm, I do the same as he.
I hate my self for my impatience. I am a calm and quiet person. Until I get to that point I try everything. Get down to his level. Speak calm. Offer hugs or conversations etc.
but there’s I point when I am sick, exhausted, with fever and cough and and and I start to raise my voice. My words stay respectful the same but louder.
At a point I grab his arm or hand and pull him gently to the room for shoes outside or jacket. It’s trrrible for me.
Now since few weeks he started to get angry very quick. Big emotions. This emotion he canalised to his brother. Hitting pushing yelling screaming, taking away toys although he will not play with it.
He slept in his room for a bit over a year. Since two weeks in my bed again. He is afraid a Dino could grab him. Even with lights on etc.
and my 1yo needs less sleep so he wakes up earlier and my 3yo is awake too. Although he would sleep longer. It’s circle. Less sleep, the age 3, I am sick as he is, my inner anger about my trauma. Etc
I saw the ADHD video and find him and me in the situation. I always have a feeling that something is wrong. And I feel guilty. I don’t know how to respond to a child laying in the floor not moving. Or constantly running away and hide for each sock, shirts, underwear. It’s frustrating. Plus the 1yo.
How to deal with the stress. I want to give him time with me alone. Mommy time. But impossible.
You said you put your daughter for a nap with such angry and weirded behaviour. I will try this. I have a feeling he needs sleep. He stopped napping 3 months ago. Because he slept at around 9-9.30pm
How long does your daughter nap?
Because sometimes it could be worst after a nap. He wants to sleep longer.
Sorry for the long text. But I never searched for such videos. Just stumbled across this.
Greetings from Germany 🇩🇪 Jana
Is there any impact on stutter with screentime? And it’s calm videos, short episodes. Of course he wants to watch dinos or more exciting episodes with cars and whatever. But I let him watch only very specific things. Not emotionally overwhelmed tv. It is Bobo Siebenschläfer or Conny.
He wants to watch cars. But I do not let him. He did some in the past. But I think it is too much.
I heard doctor K say that it is best to let your kids watch long format content when they are allowed to watch screen. So the attention span gets trained. Of course he uses better words to explain this. But the shorter films/ videos are addictive. I do not know where the line is. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 30, I don't know. But a movie of 90 minutes is preferred I guess. And check in every 30 minutes if he/ she/ they are still enjoying it or if they have the desire to do something else. En also ask this after 30 minutes when they are doing something else. Though that is more a guideline. Not a rule.
My twin girls are now 3.5 years old. And the are really in the testing boundaries phase. Not to hurt my feelings or to anger me. They don't know what their actions will result in unless I say something and really fallow through. And then they will learn. Sometimes they seem to understand it and still test if they can get away with it. It's just natural behavior. And it's up to us parents to not take it personally. And steer them in the right direction. Which indeed is really challenging when they test your patience.
About your 3 year old not playing with other kids. Don't know could be so many reasons. Best to discuss this with a professional health care person i think.
What advice do you have for a middle schooler who is showing signs of overusing his school assigned device during school to watch videos.
Without knowing specifics, I would start with asking the teachers if it’s possible to have some of the assignments offline. I’d also keep some perspective - kids goof off during school. It’s normal and good for their development in a different way. If he’s on top of his schoolwork and responsible with his devices at home, I’d not worry but keep an eye out. If schoolwork isn’t where you think he could be or home device use is getting out of hand, I’d start there. Thanks for the question! KK