JazakAllahKheir for this video. I divorced the father of my children many years ago. Unfortunately their father used our children to target me. I wont list all the wrong things he did just to hurt me. It has been one of my largest test as a muslim. I did have custody legally in America and the country of his birth as I was living there at the time. He broke all legal ruling of our agreement. I was kept from my children for almost ten years and the damage was done as he was not practicing islam at the time but was born muslim. Years of tears, fighting to prove false rumors, backbiting, turning family and friends against me…I was alone, homeless, and considered ending my life. But I never lost my faith, and my deen! Alhumdulilah I was eventually reunited with my children…but so much damage has been done. I was never supposed to have children and shortly after I took my shahada I was blessed with many children, my largest blessing in life became my largest test in my life…it took me losing everything to realize I had not put Allah first. When I started putting my faith before everything, slowly things are changing. I am safe now, I have a home, I have food, I have a place to sleep…I have to work hard to keep communication open with our children…it still breaks my heart that I am the one that is considered toxic, but as time goes on I believe they will see the truth, if not, then it from Allah! Please dont keep a child away from the other parent! It is a horrible form of abuse! JazakAllahKheir
Salaam to you sister very sad what you went though I’m also going through this only just starting the husband wouldn’t divorce me so I left him he was unbearable to live with and wasn’t supporting me how he should I’ve lived away for 1year now he has both of my Children and poisonioned them towards me it’s horrible I know your pain I may loose my house now n everything is soo hard I didn’t want to be here the other day but the faith in Allah keeps me going but feel so sad that n my children will grow up without a mother
@@mariatomlinson8804 WaAlaikum salaam dear, I understand. We have to leave it to Allah. I know that pain, but everything happens for a reason. Thank you for reaching out to me. I do understand. Just dont loose faith. JazakAllahKhaier
Ameen Ameen Ameen yaa rabbi. Oh. Am very happy you have put me on the table may Allah help me to handle my kids habibi shuquran jazira thanks a lot. Yaa. Sheik🙏🙏💓💓❤
I understand that one should not poison the child about the other spouse. but what about the reality. how can we hide reality from a child that actually what happened. they have a right to know things.
2:47 why can’t the girls also choose where they wanna go? My parents might get a divorce and I know I’m definitely staying with my mother if that were to happen
What if a father is using toxic words and brainwashing a child's mind against the mother... Still need to allow to meet father or stop it pls give solution
Unfortunately we still have to sis, just make dua that your child stays the same and doesn't get affected and when they are older, they'll know. Your actions will prove you're a good parent
My ex husband is threatening that if I remarry he will take children from me. I always do my best to make a good relationship between him and kids but he is abusive all the bad examples mufti has given is exactly what he does . He using shariah and my own imaan against me pressuring me to give him kids if I remarry . How can this happen? He is paying less now we are divorced. Really the whole situation is so upsetting and I just pray for his hidayat . Ameen
My future ex husband does this aas well. I am second wife and i ididnt know ...he told me he divorced tje 1st wife . And he knew i didnt want to be in poligyny marriage so he dediced to lie to me for a decade.... now i want a divorce as he broke nikah contract we had...and now he s worried i will remarry and tells me he will take my kidsmif i do. If i stay alone i keep my kids...butni want to move on he cant take it.... but i hav to accept his lies and his wife... how can i live without my kids...
It is known that when a woman is devorced then the woman leaves the house of the ex husband. what if that woman have children who wants to live with with their mother but the mother does not have shelter. The father have various shelter but do not want to provide for his ex and children. So what can be done in this situation.
If parents are devorced and grand children come with their mother to their grand parents and grand parents don't have any grudges for their daughter-in-law for devorce lots of money was spent for custody but just because of grand children grand parents are welcoming their daughter-in-law because grand children are too much attached to grand parents please make speech for this issue my grand daughters are 8&6
Mufti menk u didnt talk about woman who stop her child to see his dad n special his chikd love dad n she get jealous that he move on what islam say in that
What about in a nation where custody rights are equally given. My X has been controlling and manipulative our entire relationship and when our daughter was first born he became even more intolerable so I felt forced to separate from him. In doing so, I was pressured to split my time with her equally at just a year old. When I tell u that that was the most devastating experience I have ever had to live through it feels like i am losing my breath and my heart is breaking all over again. How can we apply our Islamic rules and guidelines in western nations where men take advantage of the system and continuously abuse women/mothers thru all means.
So typical wmn tooo always play the victim. Mostly in the own understanding. My islamic right to marry another wmn got me this. My first wife packed up all my belongings, left with it when I was at wrk, insisted on a divorce becoz of my marriage with 2 nd wife, took my to to domestic violence court, prevented me from seeing my kidz, took me to maintenance court n when all of this failed she left our kids with me n then left the province. N u know what. I did the consultation with her before I got married n I cld afford it financialy. When she did was unislamic. I wana see a wmn that not just feel sorry for me but will critize the crap out of her. So u complain abt muslim men, imagine what I think of u woman so called muslim
So u decide to respond to my specific post and belittle it as a mockery of ‘playing the victim’, and then proceed to victimize yourself. Lol. Your character is not one that I find value in further engaging a meaningful discussion with. Salam.
Lol no matter how u structure ur words just remember I only responded to ur post. It is ur character up for question. N its a shame that u cnt seem to see that thr is equal rights n if u cnt handle that thn thats just to bad...shame
Nope I love my mom n all moms that has her charracter, I love my sister n all wmn that has her charracter, I love my daughter n all girls that has her charracter, I love my aunties n all wmn that has their charracter. These were the wmn that stood with me recognising that it was another badly mannered, selfcentred, egotistic, western minded wmn that believed that she cld ignore sharia n do what she wanted simply bcoz she cld n bcoz she was a wmn cld get away with it. I am blessed with wmn in my life and im sure there are millions more like them. Then there r the......... also. So no I dnt hate hve the uma...sorry sister nice emotional phycology but it aint working. Now I feel more sorry for u
I want to get a divorce..i have tolerated physical and emotional abuse from my husband and i have reached the end of the road for me..,my husband refuses to say talak..,how do i go about it
Im really really curious about this i hope someone will answer this to me..Is double wedding in islam is allowed, what i mean is if the couples were living in different places so is it okay if you get married in the girls hometown then after that you get married again in the hometown of boy.?
I'm pretty sure it's okay, it's like having two parties in two different places, in Yemen we do it alot like one in a village and one in the city. I think its allow but Allah wa3lam
If your first wife has conditions and restrictions in her marriage paper, you can't double marry until you guys are together. You can marry after your divorce but depends according to marriage paper if you can marry while being with her
What if the mom isn’t allowing you to provide just to say you didn’t or don’t or if adultery took place and now you don’t know the paternity of your children, won’t the children have to be informed about the test i know questions will be asked of who what when where and how but it has to be said in this situation I think.
Shame on u menk did u read quran what there is written about it or its a wrong translation? Thats i dont like to hear any imam any longer they just talking from somewhere else not quran
Mufti is wrong this time round. Mufti is looking from the lens of the mother and minimizing the importance of fathers. Unfortunately this is the cause of divorce. Who wouldn't want a divorce? If i'm a woman, I get the child, I get money There is a better model for the child, shared care and control. .. This is too simplistic... It will not work...
Certainly the focus on men and leaving the women aside makes divorce tempted for her, as she gets kids, money, freedom and no obligations....!, mufti @menk uses "perhaps" every 30 seconds...that is not what islamic jurisprudence stands on...!
With all due respect, many women along with their kids are facing the problem of being abandoned by their husbands. They never look back, as much as it hurts and breaks the woman, the kids hurt and its very difficult and heartbreaking. Many women dont hv financial stability or help from family so its really hard for them. Thats why Mufti Menk is raising this issue. However i do know that many men are suffering bcoz of some arrogant and crooked women. Everyone needs to remember that Allah Will do justice., even if you cant see it happening soon. Indeed Allah is The Most Merciful. Prayers for all who still feel the hurt. May Allah Heal all of us with His Mercy. Aameen.
WOW...................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................Do you know you can remotely access your cheating spouses’ phone and generate ongoing and deleted text messages (as far back as 2 years) without touching the device? Reach out to co.llier883 on Instagram or text him on WhatsApp on his cellphone on +18182766123 email (cyberhackingsage6@gmail•com), to help you on any hacking issues...WhatsApp, iCloud unlock and social media recovery. now i have enough evidence for my divorce.
JazakAllahKheir for this video. I divorced the father of my children many years ago. Unfortunately their father used our children to target me. I wont list all the wrong things he did just to hurt me. It has been one of my largest test as a muslim. I did have custody legally in America and the country of his birth as I was living there at the time. He broke all legal ruling of our agreement. I was kept from my children for almost ten years and the damage was done as he was not practicing islam at the time but was born muslim. Years of tears, fighting to prove false rumors, backbiting, turning family and friends against me…I was alone, homeless, and considered ending my life. But I never lost my faith, and my deen! Alhumdulilah I was eventually reunited with my children…but so much damage has been done. I was never supposed to have children and shortly after I took my shahada I was blessed with many children, my largest blessing in life became my largest test in my life…it took me losing everything to realize I had not put Allah first. When I started putting my faith before everything, slowly things are changing. I am safe now, I have a home, I have food, I have a place to sleep…I have to work hard to keep communication open with our children…it still breaks my heart that I am the one that is considered toxic, but as time goes on I believe they will see the truth, if not, then it from Allah! Please dont keep a child away from the other parent! It is a horrible form of abuse! JazakAllahKheir
I'm going through something so similar right now and your comment gives me hope. My kids were taken from me and I cry everyday. I hope they are fine
Salaam to you sister very sad what you went though I’m also going through this only just starting the husband wouldn’t divorce me so I left him he was unbearable to live with and wasn’t supporting me how he should I’ve lived away for 1year now he has both of my Children and poisonioned them towards me it’s horrible I know your pain I may loose my house now n everything is soo hard I didn’t want to be here the other day but the faith in Allah keeps me going but feel so sad that n my children will grow up without a mother
@@mariatomlinson8804 WaAlaikum salaam dear, I understand. We have to leave it to Allah. I know that pain, but everything happens for a reason. Thank you for reaching out to me. I do understand. Just dont loose faith. JazakAllahKhaier
What was the point of marriage. If there is divorce the children want mother not the father for breaking the marriage.
Ameen Ameen Ameen yaa rabbi. Oh. Am very happy you have put me on the table may Allah help me to handle my kids habibi shuquran jazira thanks a lot. Yaa. Sheik🙏🙏💓💓❤
Subhan’Allah, it’s difficult when dealing with a person who favours one child and wants to deliberately cause financial difficulties.
I understand that one should not poison the child about the other spouse. but what about the reality. how can we hide reality from a child that actually what happened. they have a right to know things.
Thank you Mufti, may peace be upon you. Very informative
Thank you so much menk. It's so helpful.
Very thoughtful and beneficial.Jzk
2:47 why can’t the girls also choose where they wanna go? My parents might get a divorce and I know I’m definitely staying with my mother if that were to happen
I agree with you. I would make them both understand why I'd stay with my mom
This is a question that you should ask a scholar about. There are some Islamic rules there that need to be taken into consideration
A female child is to stay with her mother until she starts her period or up until she gets married.
hell no, I'm sorry but my dads abusive, and I'm not staying with him no matter what, he guilt trips but I dont care, I'm not seeing my dad again
I'm assuming it may have something to do with the father being the daughter's mehram
What if a father is using toxic words and brainwashing a child's mind against the mother... Still need to allow to meet father or stop it pls give solution
Same my situation 😭
Unfortunately we still have to sis, just make dua that your child stays the same and doesn't get affected and when they are older, they'll know. Your actions will prove you're a good parent
My ex husband is threatening that if I remarry he will take children from me. I always do my best to make a good relationship between him and kids but he is abusive all the bad examples mufti has given is exactly what he does . He using shariah and my own imaan against me pressuring me to give him kids if I remarry . How can this happen? He is paying less now we are divorced. Really the whole situation is so upsetting and I just pray for his hidayat . Ameen
My future ex husband does this aas well. I am second wife and i ididnt know ...he told me he divorced tje 1st wife . And he knew i didnt want to be in poligyny marriage so he dediced to lie to me for a decade.... now i want a divorce as he broke nikah contract we had...and now he s worried i will remarry and tells me he will take my kidsmif i do. If i stay alone i keep my kids...butni want to move on he cant take it.... but i hav to accept his lies and his wife... how can i live without my kids...
@@nadz5164in Islam his right is to have the child if you re marry if it’s a daughter and a son can choose if he reaches puberty
@@MessiWorldCup-th2dethat’s messed up. It’s like punishing women for divorcing by losing her children in Islam.
It is known that when a woman is devorced then the woman leaves the house of the ex husband. what if that woman have children who wants to live with with their mother but the mother does not have shelter. The father have various shelter but do not want to provide for his ex and children. So what can be done in this situation.
Get help never abandone your children keep trying ALLAH will make a way I been through it,MAY ALLAH make it easy for you and your children AMEEN.
If u cannot provide and get help from anyone don’t let ur children suffer because of u I guess let them at least have shelter. But he should provide
How to get correct guidance for marriage life ?
When a girl is extremely unhappy with it.
And wants to live a happy andvpeaceful life with my son
You can Write him in live Chat
Salam bro. You are s sensible person. Allah bless you.
Can you do a lecture on Haq Mehar??
Is true what you said but I’m women not mad but he is because I’m moving on with my life
I don’t get why the child has to go to father, my mom and dad divorced and I chose to be with my mom
Jazakallaha khair for the best advice
If parents are devorced and grand children come with their mother to their grand parents and grand parents don't have any grudges for their daughter-in-law for devorce lots of money was spent for custody but just because of grand children grand parents are welcoming their daughter-in-law because grand children are too much attached to grand parents please make speech for this issue my grand daughters are 8&6
He already said mother and father are primary. You will always be secondary
Mufti menk u didnt talk about woman who stop her child to see his dad n special his chikd love dad n she get jealous that he move on what islam say in that
What about in a nation where custody rights are equally given. My X has been controlling and manipulative our entire relationship and when our daughter was first born he became even more intolerable so I felt forced to separate from him. In doing so, I was pressured to split my time with her equally at just a year old. When I tell u that that was the most devastating experience I have ever had to live through it feels like i am losing my breath and my heart is breaking all over again. How can we apply our Islamic rules and guidelines in western nations where men take advantage of the system and continuously abuse women/mothers thru all means.
So typical wmn tooo always play the victim. Mostly in the own understanding. My islamic right to marry another wmn got me this. My first wife packed up all my belongings, left with it when I was at wrk, insisted on a divorce becoz of my marriage with 2 nd wife, took my to to domestic violence court, prevented me from seeing my kidz, took me to maintenance court n when all of this failed she left our kids with me n then left the province. N u know what. I did the consultation with her before I got married n I cld afford it financialy. When she did was unislamic. I wana see a wmn that not just feel sorry for me but will critize the crap out of her. So u complain abt muslim men, imagine what I think of u woman so called muslim
So u decide to respond to my specific post and belittle it as a mockery of ‘playing the victim’, and then proceed to victimize yourself. Lol. Your character is not one that I find value in further engaging a meaningful discussion with. Salam.
Lol no matter how u structure ur words just remember I only responded to ur post. It is ur character up for question. N its a shame that u cnt seem to see that thr is equal rights n if u cnt handle that thn thats just to bad...shame
....says the person who disrespects the entire half of the Muslim population as ‘so called Muslim’. Ok.
Nope I love my mom n all moms that has her charracter, I love my sister n all wmn that has her charracter, I love my daughter n all girls that has her charracter, I love my aunties n all wmn that has their charracter. These were the wmn that stood with me recognising that it was another badly mannered, selfcentred, egotistic, western minded wmn that believed that she cld ignore sharia n do what she wanted simply bcoz she cld n bcoz she was a wmn cld get away with it. I am blessed with wmn in my life and im sure there are millions more like them. Then there r the......... also. So no I dnt hate hve the uma...sorry sister nice emotional phycology but it aint working. Now I feel more sorry for u
I want to get a divorce..i have tolerated physical and emotional abuse from my husband and i have reached the end of the road for me..,my husband refuses to say talak..,how do i go about it
Take kula siso.
Gather evidence of his abuse and go to a fair imam. Don't have kids with him in the meantime.
Question: ist in islam a woman block the kids from the father? The law is different nowadays
You should ask the children
Thank you brotha
10:29, 15min? Hopefully, It is much more than in prison.
Im really really curious about this i hope someone will answer this to me..Is double wedding in islam is allowed, what i mean is if the couples were living in different places so is it okay if you get married in the girls hometown then after that you get married again in the hometown of boy.?
I'm pretty sure it's okay, it's like having two parties in two different places, in Yemen we do it alot like one in a village and one in the city. I think its allow but Allah wa3lam
If your first wife has conditions and restrictions in her marriage paper, you can't double marry until you guys are together. You can marry after your divorce but depends according to marriage paper if you can marry while being with her
What if the mom isn’t allowing you to provide just to say you didn’t or don’t or if adultery took place and now you don’t know the paternity of your children, won’t the children have to be informed about the test i know questions will be asked of who what when where and how but it has to be said in this situation I think.
Shame on u menk did u read quran what there is written about it or its a wrong translation? Thats i dont like to hear any imam any longer they just talking from somewhere else not quran
Mufti is wrong this time round.
Mufti is looking from the lens of the mother and minimizing the importance of fathers.
Unfortunately this is the cause of divorce. Who wouldn't want a divorce? If i'm a woman, I get the child, I get money
There is a better model for the child, shared care and control. .. This is too simplistic... It will not work...
Certainly the focus on men and leaving the women aside makes divorce tempted for her, as she gets kids, money, freedom and no obligations....!, mufti @menk uses "perhaps" every 30 seconds...that is not what islamic jurisprudence stands on...!
With all due respect, many women along with their kids are facing the problem of being abandoned by their husbands. They never look back, as much as it hurts and breaks the woman, the kids hurt and its very difficult and heartbreaking. Many women dont hv financial stability or help from family so its really hard for them. Thats why Mufti Menk is raising this issue. However i do know that many men are suffering bcoz of some arrogant and crooked women. Everyone needs to remember that Allah Will do justice., even if you cant see it happening soon. Indeed Allah is The Most Merciful.
Prayers for all who still feel the hurt. May Allah Heal all of us with His Mercy. Aameen.
Unfortunately this guy mostly address to men....doesn't he know women of today, is he living in fool's paradise...!
WOW...................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................Do you know you can remotely access your cheating spouses’ phone and generate ongoing and deleted text messages (as far back as 2 years) without touching the device? Reach out to co.llier883 on Instagram or text him on WhatsApp on his cellphone on +18182766123 email (cyberhackingsage6@gmail•com), to help you on any hacking issues...WhatsApp, iCloud unlock and social media recovery. now i have enough evidence for my divorce.