I would really like to hear you talk about hoarding and it`s connection to other mental disorders and addictions. I have a family member who I`m pretty sure has histrionic personality disorder as well as drug addiction and constant, compulsive lying. She`s clever and funny but that just makes it sadder that, not only does she drive people away, but she also destroys every place that subsidized housing gives to her. It takes a few years, because at first she tries, but then she gives up and between the fleas from the cats, the roaches from the uncleaned food, and the general untidyness make the place unliveable. I just want to add that I find your accent, voice, and humor comforting and it helps me stay calm even when the topic is stressful.
@@GerboaGuzentas I'm from Canada. What is your advice? Same here being bullied, mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for over 12 years. I've happened to be the top worker for 38 years and have never been suspended. These bullies are jealous and miserable people. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, I drink, I'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. The biggest mistake since they removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroyed my reputation. I will never quit to make these lazy bums ever win. If I decide to transfer to another hospital and may start mobbing me once again, I don't know all the new managers etc. like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. I will never let bullies try to control me from quitting. Never let these low life lazy bums ever win.[
I should've known my work place was toxic when my contract stated I had to give 2 months notice if I wanted to leave or if I got retrenched. Most potential employers will not wait 2 months for you to start working unless you have some very niche hard to find skills or experience.
A boss using ANOTHER employee to do harassing behavior towards a BETTER WORKER while PRAISING a worker with LESS DESIRABLE work ethics. "SHIELDING themself from their toxic LEADERSHIP ( or lack of leadership ).
This is not school where you study and get marks. Work environment is completely different and people will try to tear you down and pass blame. Try to keep everything written and document each and everything. Even if HR doesnt support you, still do it for yourself and your future.
A boss that always wants your input and then shuts it down or ridicules it in front of others or sends passive agressive emails with underhanded comments clearly aimed at you and when you talk to them about it 1 on 1 they act as though you're the best employee and they have nothing but praise for you. Manipulation, singling you out and gas lighting will make anyone hate their work environment no matter how positive they are. We all want to be part of a team and know our contributions are appreciated.
I had a manager who always said, "People don't leave jobs, they leave managers." When I gave him my notice, he never even bothered to respond. Hypocrite.
Giant red flag: nepotism arrangements. When the boss' wife/husband works in the office. Especially if they're not qualified for the role. Run far, far away and don't ever accept the job. Nothing good ever comes out of that. Or any form of nepotism really (friends, family members, etc). You, as the employee, will always be "wrong". Not to mention, if you have a legitimate complaint about a spouse, you can't exactly bring that up to the boss. Nepotism harms morale in the office.
You have described it extremely well Darren. This is exactly what a toxic work place looks like. And it is Absolutely true that people leave not the workplace but the bad bosses and toxic work colleagues. Plain and simple. Thank you.
This may be TMI but it's relevant to a toxic workplace. I started noticing that no matter what shampoos I was using, my dandruff wasn't going away. And I rarely had an itchy scalp. So on a whim, after I left that toxic environment of a job, I checked my dandruff and it was gone. Then I brainstormed something and decided to look it up. Lo and behold, my dandruff was my body's way of responding to the stress. I don't have that stress anymore. Dandruff, gone.
@@occamsshavecream4541 same, which is why I refuse to work inside offices. It drastically cuts down on your exposure to it, but toxic people in positions of even a tiny sliver of power will still try to drag you into their nastiness.
I worked for years in a very toxic workplace. It has been less than a year since I left and I am still processing and trying to make sense of what happened. I grew up in a dysfunctional family and was used to tolerating and making excuses for bad behavior. That is one of the reasons why I stayed at that terrible workplace for so long. This video is very validating of my experiences. Thank you!
Thank you Darren, this is an excellent description of a toxic workplace. I have seen all nine signs in a former job where the department was headed by a malignant narcissist. It was hell on earth. I refused to tow the line and was booted. The time on my hands led me to educate myself about narcissism though, and eventually I moved on to a much better job. Among my many readings, I found "The Working Life: The Promise and Betrayal of Modern Work" by Joanne Ciulla to be an instructive revelation. By the way, that malignant narcissist was eventually fired. Once in a while, the narcs do get their comeuppance!
I used to work in a place, a passenger railroad, that was very much like a concentration camp. In one very unfortunate case, an employee was being constantly mistreated by his boss for a very long time. In that environment there was no one he could go to for help. The company didn't care to intervene because this entire place is run in an environment of abuse and oppression, from the top down. He tried to appeal to the union for help, but the union there does nothing but collect over $100 a month in union dues, and go to union conventions in places like Hawaii. This is a place where even the thought of going to work puts a knot in your stomach and fills you with apprehension. At this time, this young man's mother had just died. He was already living a hellish life at work and feeling downtrodden, with no one to help him and no way out, so the death of his mother at that time was more than he could handle. At work one day his boss started to abuse and humiliate him in front of the other employees, just as this boss had done countless times in the past. This young man pulled out a pistol and shot his boss. He then ran away from the work location. He was found dead in his car with a self inflicted gunshot wound to the head. His boss recovered from the non life threatening gunshot wound, and sued the company, winning $5,000,000. Too bad the young man didn't have better aim.
Omg how horrible. I went through similar experiences 10 years ago. I have such a trauma that today I need a roller to walk. And the former boss is having a great career and life. I still think everyday of this POS and have similar thoughts as your former co-worker.
i experience just about all of those things. the worst is the boss that just refuses to give any credit and consciously blocks and prevents you from getting your work done just because he doesn't want you to be able to do your job, even if it means the company suffers.
I recently kindly asked for better communication after a problem happened where things would have gone smoother had I been communicated with....I was told by my boss "You can't expect perfection all the time"! This really made me feel like I just need to shut up and deal with whatever happens.😢
Too many of these fit a place I used to work. At the time, all I knew was that I was miserable. I couldn't see it until I was free of it. Kinda like you can't see you're in a toxic relationship while you're in it. You have to be told, and that was true for me, too. For those interested, the ones that were present were: cliques, poor communication, no opportunities, and bullying.
ultimate sign of a toxic workplace: the customers leave in droves, don't come back and the company doesn't care about it until they turn off the lights for the last time.
I’ve only ever been in toxic workplaces, and always fell ill in some way, exhibiting all kinds of “mysterious“ symptoms. I’m sure this video will help MANY who are looking for answers. 🙏 Shared on Facebook.
I think it gets tougher as you get older and you're not willing to be belittled, undermined, gaslit, insulted publicly etc etc. But yes toxicity has become very obvious in most work environments these days.
@@BillClinton228 When I was in my teens & 20s, there was no internet, and thus no social media as sources of quality info. In a world where narcs rule & design it to benefit only other narcs, I was always puzzled as to why people were the way they are-it was like living in a parallel universe. I never questioned whether I was wrong, since I’d always produced desirable results & was intuitively drawn to what’s healthy & effective, but I thought it so strange that I was amongst these “sleeping” creatures who all seemed to understand each other implicitly, despite being wholly toxic & ineffective. Most people in the mainstream seem to conflate “majority rules” with being right, never questioning the reality of the world being full of broken people with broken practices.
You are the 1st video that describes every aspect of the hellhole I just quit after 3 days! You can't imagine how many people might feel validated hearing this precious video!! Thank you!! Most other videos barely touch the surface & just repeat what others have said!! Fyi know it all recruiters are not working on the floors with patients in high risk skeletal crew places!!
My job is literally every single one of your talking points in the video. And yes, I can attest that a job like this spills over into every aspect of your personal life. It’s horrible.
I think top-down leadership is very important because that's how bad patterns are accepted. I noticed even when someone high in command wants to do something that is counter to a good workplace the owner is striving for, the manager will be overruled. There's a channel called "Workplace Bullying Institute" that's a great source and they recommend going two steps above a bully being usually the bully has charmed those bosses near themselves. An example here is how a lead and a supervisor may be charmed by a worker bully but someone higher may not give any space for that behavior.
I'm still in court against my exemployer - extreme manipulative toxic working environment. When I quit, I got attacked by slander and libel. Unfortunately, it coincided with COVID. I'm destroyed A lot of what you describe is what my work environment was like -
Personal Improvement Plans! These play a huge role in toxic workplaces. PIPs are, of course, a well-recognised punishment, bullying and dismissal tool, and they can be quite Kafkaesque. They may also be used cynically to block promotions or force demotions, and deny an end-of-year bonus to an otherwise top performer.
I agree I found that “ Personal Improvement plans “ are nothing to do with your personal improvement but just a way for your manager to make negative comments about you and prevent you from another further promotion/ Bonus
Last week I got fired from a job that fit every single one of those 9 criteria. I want to make it clear, that I am not proud of getting fired. However, I believe I got out at the perfect time before I got in too deep. An additional red flag that just did not make me feel warm and fuzzy, tracking my work phone off work hours and on weekends. I guess that falls into the blurring of work and personal life. But unfortunately a lot of this stuff doesn't show itself until you are hired. Biggest suggestion, do not work for a small family company.
This is so true. When I had a toxic workplace, everyone took advantage of that and made home toxic also for me. It was getting worse as time went on. I trusted people at home to share what was going on at work with them, but I didn't really know who they actually were themselves. It's so ironic how I've been duped my whole life under the protected umbrella of family rights & responsibilities. Ever since I've slowly come to reality, it's gotten worse at home, unfortunately. They live under my roof, free room & board. They have no respect for me or my property or ny things & they won't accept the middle ground in any situation & it's like they have got me blocked & squared in by diminishing any connections & help I had by emotionally pulling me into their drama series & alienating me from the outside world. I'm always to blame. If they could, they would probably blame me for Adam & Eve's mistake & tell me everyone is in this hell hole because of me 😐
I hope that this prolonged state of “purgatory” won’t be the final chapter in your life story. May the lessons be gleaned, and access & opportunities for a brighter life open up for you. 🙏
@@MoPoppins I hope so too. But my approach this time would be diplomatic so I can intellectually go about all of this mess thus lowering the chances of backlash towards my property & my well being. I've received all sorts of threats left & right for a few years now from people known & stranger to me. If they don't understand the language of love, empathy & open communication, perhaps they will understand me when I treat them like strangers taking up too much of my time. TY for the words of wisdom 💜
You just described every job I've ever had here in the USA. I've been in the Senior level and Executive level for decades and every single company from small to Fortune 50, have these work environments.
Dr. Magee I've learned so much from you for the past 3yrs, you truly are a God sent 👍🏻 TY 😊Please do a video on how to handle such a toxic work environment & how to conduct oneself when faced with cut throat options which not only makes one accept responsibility for something they didn't do/say or face being fired/dismissed. I was taken by surprise & made to sign pre-printed paperwork a few minutes before the end of my shift when I couldn't afford to lose my job. I was told, "Don't worry, you have two more strikes left. Just accept it & I'll work with you to make things better by talking to the regional & clarifying the misunderstandings going forward. Things just escalated from there onwards, it gotten to a point where two manager later in a short while orders were being yelled at me, I was being belittled, blamed, harrased, tormented in front of customers & coworkers during work hours & one on one when alone closing up. At one point I felt unsafe so I decided to walk outside the premises I was aggressively yelled at to get back in or I was going to be reported to head office for not adhering to authority & not following safety & security protocols 😐 after dropping off this at the bank together I called the regional & he too didn't want to hear it or help me. At the time I felt like he didn't believe me, but later, after my employment was done there, I truly felt like this whole scheme was his own plan & doing with the help of my manager & other staff members who wanted me gone.
Remember & always be aware that some people (i.e., narcs) always need a SCAPEGOAT. Karma dictates that we remain in a certain state or place until we learn the lessons we’re meant to, but do try to VISUALIZE & experience in your mind’s body what you DO want, so you can reverse-engineer it, or have it come to pass, as the universe coordinates the various moving parts in the world to conspire its conclusion. Sometimes, endings are meant to bring new beginnings, but there are “slots” for things to pull into, like parking spaces. If that space is already occupied, you aren’t allowing new energy & new opportunities to flow into your life. Wishing you all the best. 🙏✨💕
@MoPoppins true, even though it was extremely hard I did this for employment situation because they were in the bigger sense strangers. The fear of losing everyone & everything & visualizing to start from scratch doesn't leave ones mind when having repetitive negative behaviour out of no fault of one's own. Worst part is any connection I had in the outside have all dissolved due to narcissists from within. This directly impacts how we see, interpret & make sense of the world around us & ultimately how we manage to solve life's issues as they come along the way. I'll keep your words in minf & let's see what I can do going forward if things go south again.
@@myjourneytotruth When situations escalate to the point where it breaks us in some way, THAT’s when we literally have to move on, regardless of whether we’ve secured anything better for purely practical reasons (like being able to continually pay the rent/mortgage, utilities, car payments, gas, etc.). I hope it doesn’t come to that, for you, but do take heed of all the SIGNS you receive from the universe, whether it’s dead ends, sabotage, gut feelings, symptoms of dis-ease in the body, and so on. 🙏
Facts! All of them. Describes our former church - all leadership +some of the staff, along with my former employer(who was also independent contractor at said church)
2 of my bosses often enjoyed humiliating me in front of customers. They would make a scene and let someone else cover the cash register while they would stand there and verbally abuse me.
Abvsolutely on point. Thank you . People need to know these things for lack of compass in general. Company policy of this sort does not inspire me to anything but withdrawal.
I had this at my old job. I had 2 bullied above me in mgmt. to the point that I got passed over for a job. I presented my outstanding resume and did not even get an interview. I presented the identical resume to the market and got a large psy rise and going 2 steps up the mgmt ladder. I was told that I was paid well and what I was worth. I looked after my company and made good decisions. I was ranted at for avoiding a potentially embarrassing thing for my company. The mgr that was above me told me that he submitted a position description change to my job (no consultation with me) he was told that what he wrote was too close to his position description. He literally told me about this. He constantly made fun of female team members. He was given the job above me with zero know knowledge of job he had to do. I had my work plagiarised. I even got so scared to promote myself I begged a senior manager friend not to put my name on a presentation I made for her, because I feared being dragged over the coals for helping. He also made fun of the women in my team and I defended them. I got put on the spot for this too.
My entire workplace went fully remote after the 2020s. It seems like many of these toxic characteristics were amplified when that happened. Would be interesting to see some videos about how remote work can affect toxicity in the workplace.
Yup, many toxic coworkers and managers are emboldened in being abusive when they can do so from a distance. Horrible behavior in teleconferences, nasty text messages and emails, stonewalling etc. all facilitated by the ability to push Send and not deal with their victim face to face. I don't get how people are so in denial about this.
I've worked at TOXIC workplaces all of my life from Saverite until they went out of business to the US post office that had me working 7 days a week being a city carrier assistant. I resigned from 7 YEARS AGO and there was so much backstabbing and managers that spread gossip that if you had trouble on a route, you would hear it from a coworker bullying you talking about how the company needed to fire you in addition to being written up and being RUSHED on the routes. Some manager at a station around the corner from my Mom's house, who claimed to be christian used me because she was leaving messages on my phone and calling me in on my off days.
Being held to a "different standard ", a very narcissistic boss who thinks public humiliation is an HR tactic, words vs actions never really line up (regarding raises), exclusionary tactics regarding workload,breaks,etc. These are some of the issues ever present in a toxic workplace. The speed of the leader is the speed of the team. When the leader is bogging the team down, the team disintegrates
All of the above in my immediate situation of employment.....Unfortunately it appears to be the common dynamic of the modern day work force.....I've looked for other jobs and they actually seem to be worst than my current job.
If you are a good salesperson, work for YOURSELF, NOT FOR ANOTHER. Chances are, due to greed, the boss will work you to build his business and then let you go. Often with him owing you commissions.
Creating an environment that sets up an subordinate to fail in order to justify the label of an incompetent employee seems to me to dovetail with a covert narcissist leadership style and capitalism driven desire to pay the least possible. The concept of a team effort is counter productive in such an environment. The lack of good faith and clear boundaries/responsibilities serves to perpetuate abuse.
1) cliques that exclude others and ignore them 2) poor listening 👂 skills 3) lying and blaming others and an atmosphere of fear 4) unreasonable expectations 5) lack of development or growth within the organization. 6) no motivation 7) high turnover of staff like at Walmart 8) only feedback people get is negative feedback 9) bullying and threatening behavior I worked for a workplace like this in the past.
You described the work environment I have been subjected to for 17 years without realising. It has affected me physically n mentally. I want to leave but have not found another job
These workplaces carry on the same when you leave because they know no better. Best to leave quietly and never look back. You might get lucky and find a better situation but the experience has value. You cannot stop it but you can learn to handle it.
The first sign I noticed was high employee turnover, which resulted in the company being understaffed and employees getting overworked and burned out to the max. Then it was favoritism and "clicks" with management and certain employees. Then it was lack of feedback, support and further training. By the end, it was increase of "metrics2 and PIPs, isolation from others due to not "fitting in" the work culture (aka, their clicks) and seeing my incompetent ass kissing co-worker get promoted over me. That was my last straw, so I left.
Can you share how to survive in this type of toxic working environment on another video. I was in a similar situation & finally it all blew up, I am not there anymore & there is bad beliefs about me so lost all friends
Yes first sign I'm not even included in the group chat of work and the management decision is that,i heard her saying behind my back that k must not be in that group and in front of my face she fakes nice and that it's fine about me not being the group yet as the last arrived and for less time experience there worker, I've been there for more than 4 months already and i heard that all the others that when they first came they were soon added in the group unlike me
I had a toxic boss call me up after I quit the job threatening to take me to court for slander I ask him what he was talking about he said I told 2 employees there he would come to my house and drag me to work. I told him on the phone iam sorry he felt this way and blocked his number
Small Home Health Care companies ran outside of the United States of America and some within the US! Watch out healthcare workers and always check the company reviews by the dates they were written and check out if possible who are the managers and their backgrounds! Do not waste your time on BS companies EVER!😊✨🍀
How can you identify a healthy work environment in a job interview? It's been my experience that the vast majority of employers are dishonest in job interviews and don't tell you what you really want to know.
Software industry is quite toxic. Owing to rapid growth of the sector management tends to be a bit amateurish. It’s a young industry after all. People who shouldn’t be managing anyone rise to positions of power as companies expand. Another phenomenon that leads to bad management is “the Dead Sea effect “, whereby the least competent get promoted because they stick around the longest in one firm, while the better employees move on. Perverse incentives also lead to toxic cultures. Short term expedience resulting in long term technical debt issues, which in turn leads to a stressed out workforce. Hiring practices are also deeply flawed…the whiteboard crucible!
Lol aren't they all toxic, so what is the point 🤔 in leaving, you leave that toxic job only to be hired at another, we just have to face the elephant in the room, we as people are toxic, for people that have autism and can work my suggestion is to only stay for a few years if you can manage that because you will find that you will be the target of some sociopath or narcissistist that is power hungry so they will need someone to throw under the bus to make them shine 😉 and ✋️ we autistic people are always the weakest links because of our inability to connect and make friends. This is why you need to protect yourself.
@@symbolsandsystems Paradise or garden in Islam-is described in the Quran as an eternal afterlife of peace and bliss, where the faithful and righteous are rewarded. The Quran says the righteous will be restful in the presence of God, in "gardens beneath which rivers flow." The word "Jannah" (Paradise) comes from an Arabic word that means "to cover or hide something." Heaven, therefore, is a place that is unseen to us. Paradise is the final destination in the afterlife for good and faithful Muslims.
Darren, you have described exactly the workplace I am working. I am already suffering anxiety and stress disorders because of that and currently on sick leave. Every morning I wake with dull nerve pains on my chest and back because of this. Please, tell me how dangerous it is keeping working at such a place, and does it worth working there if salary is a little higher than average salary in the city ?
Please feel free to suggest any topics you might like me to cover in future videos.
I would really like to hear you talk about hoarding and it`s connection to other mental disorders and addictions. I have a family member who I`m pretty sure has histrionic personality disorder as well as drug addiction and constant, compulsive lying. She`s clever and funny but that just makes it sadder that, not only does she drive people away, but she also destroys every place that subsidized housing gives to her. It takes a few years, because at first she tries, but then she gives up and between the fleas from the cats, the roaches from the uncleaned food, and the general untidyness make the place unliveable.
I just want to add that I find your accent, voice, and humor comforting and it helps me stay calm even when the topic is stressful.
I recently read an article about Brooke Shields and her mother in relation to 'covert incest', would be a great topic
@@GerboaGuzentas I'm from Canada. What is your advice? Same here being bullied, mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for over 12 years. I've happened to be the top worker for 38 years and have never been suspended. These bullies are jealous and miserable people. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, I drink, I'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. The biggest mistake since they removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroyed my reputation. I will never quit to make these lazy bums ever win. If I decide to transfer to another hospital and may start mobbing me once again, I don't know all the new managers etc. like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. I will never let bullies try to control me from quitting. Never let these low life lazy bums ever win.[
I should've known my work place was toxic when my contract stated I had to give 2 months notice if I wanted to leave or if I got retrenched. Most potential employers will not wait 2 months for you to start working unless you have some very niche hard to find skills or experience.
A boss using ANOTHER employee to do harassing behavior towards a BETTER WORKER while PRAISING a worker with LESS DESIRABLE work ethics. "SHIELDING themself from their toxic LEADERSHIP ( or lack of leadership ).
Been there , i feel sorry for them , such a pathetic and cowardly way to go through life.
Quite familiar with this particular topic.....I've been going through this for a number of years.
This is not school where you study and get marks. Work environment is completely different and people will try to tear you down and pass blame. Try to keep everything written and document each and everything. Even if HR doesnt support you, still do it for yourself and your future.
A boss that always wants your input and then shuts it down or ridicules it in front of others or sends passive agressive emails with underhanded comments clearly aimed at you and when you talk to them about it 1 on 1 they act as though you're the best employee and they have nothing but praise for you.
Manipulation, singling you out and gas lighting will make anyone hate their work environment no matter how positive they are. We all want to be part of a team and know our contributions are appreciated.
@@BillClinton228 Exactly.
I had a manager who always said, "People don't leave jobs, they leave managers." When I gave him my notice, he never even bothered to respond. Hypocrite.
He knew what he was talking about !
@@clincpb8903 Yup! He’s been left MANY times, and probably not only by underlings at the workplace!
Giant red flag: nepotism arrangements. When the boss' wife/husband works in the office. Especially if they're not qualified for the role. Run far, far away and don't ever accept the job. Nothing good ever comes out of that. Or any form of nepotism really (friends, family members, etc). You, as the employee, will always be "wrong". Not to mention, if you have a legitimate complaint about a spouse, you can't exactly bring that up to the boss. Nepotism harms morale in the office.
You have described it extremely well Darren. This is exactly what a toxic work place looks like. And it is Absolutely true that people leave not the workplace but the bad bosses and toxic work colleagues. Plain and simple. Thank you.
People don't leave jobs; they leave bosses/managers
@@jonnuanez7183 🎯🎯
This may be TMI but it's relevant to a toxic workplace. I started noticing that no matter what shampoos I was using, my dandruff wasn't going away. And I rarely had an itchy scalp. So on a whim, after I left that toxic environment of a job, I checked my dandruff and it was gone. Then I brainstormed something and decided to look it up. Lo and behold, my dandruff was my body's way of responding to the stress. I don't have that stress anymore. Dandruff, gone.
Wow!
You just described every job I ever had.
yep, every office I've worked in had these characteristics.
@@occamsshavecream4541 same, which is why I refuse to work inside offices. It drastically cuts down on your exposure to it, but toxic people in positions of even a tiny sliver of power will still try to drag you into their nastiness.
yep!@@rockstarofredondo
I would imagine the tenth sign to be researching whether one indeed has one.
Sounds like a GREAT starting point. That's why we're ALL watching this 🎥. 😉
I worked for years in a very toxic workplace. It has been less than a year since I left and I am still processing and trying to make sense of what happened. I grew up in a dysfunctional family and was used to tolerating and making excuses for bad behavior. That is one of the reasons why I stayed at that terrible workplace for so long. This video is very validating of my experiences. Thank you!
To Darren and all those who shared your experience.
You saved my life.
Thank you
Thank you Darren, this is an excellent description of a toxic workplace. I have seen all nine signs in a former job where the department was headed by a malignant narcissist. It was hell on earth. I refused to tow the line and was booted. The time on my hands led me to educate myself about narcissism though, and eventually I moved on to a much better job. Among my many readings, I found "The Working Life: The Promise and Betrayal of Modern Work" by Joanne Ciulla to be an instructive revelation. By the way, that malignant narcissist was eventually fired. Once in a while, the narcs do get their comeuppance!
I used to work in a place, a passenger railroad, that was very much like a concentration camp. In one very unfortunate case, an employee was being constantly mistreated by his boss for a very long time. In that environment there was no one he could go to for help. The company didn't care to intervene because this entire place is run in an environment of abuse and oppression, from the top down. He tried to appeal to the union for help, but the union there does nothing but collect over $100 a month in union dues, and go to union conventions in places like Hawaii. This is a place where even the thought of going to work puts a knot in your stomach and fills you with apprehension. At this time, this young man's mother had just died. He was already living a hellish life at work and feeling downtrodden, with no one to help him and no way out, so the death of his mother at that time was more than he could handle. At work one day his boss started to abuse and humiliate him in front of the other employees, just as this boss had done countless times in the past. This young man pulled out a pistol and shot his boss. He then ran away from the work location. He was found dead in his car with a self inflicted gunshot wound to the head. His boss recovered from the non life threatening gunshot wound, and sued the company, winning $5,000,000. Too bad the young man didn't have better aim.
Tragic
very sad. I'm in exactly situation. Curse those evil people, this world is hell.
Wow
Omg how horrible. I went through similar experiences 10 years ago. I have such a trauma that today I need a roller to walk. And the former boss is having a great career and life. I still think everyday of this POS and have similar thoughts as your former co-worker.
How sad. This is just one example why there need to be laws regarding workplace bullying. I am so sorry to hear this. How tragic!
i experience just about all of those things. the worst is the boss that just refuses to give any credit and consciously blocks and prevents you from getting your work done just because he doesn't want you to be able to do your job, even if it means the company suffers.
Experienced this in every job.
I recently kindly asked for better communication after a problem happened where things would have gone smoother had I been communicated with....I was told by my boss "You can't expect perfection all the time"! This really made me feel like I just need to shut up and deal with whatever happens.😢
If you can get out don't stay. I have been dealing with a a****** of a manager and I am just walking out on. It's not worth the stressman.
Too many of these fit a place I used to work. At the time, all I knew was that I was miserable. I couldn't see it until I was free of it. Kinda like you can't see you're in a toxic relationship while you're in it. You have to be told, and that was true for me, too.
For those interested, the ones that were present were: cliques, poor communication, no opportunities, and bullying.
many of these Toxic Workplace signs are also present in personal and intimate Toxic Relationships.
Always an eyeopener Darren, ..... Thank You .
ultimate sign of a toxic workplace: the customers leave in droves, don't come back and the company doesn't care about it until they turn off the lights for the last time.
Okay, most videos talk abt toxic environments.
What are healthy work environments?
How do we recognize them, especially during interviews?
I would really like to know that too. Ward off a bad job at the pass so to speak.
I’ve only ever been in toxic workplaces, and always fell ill in some way, exhibiting all kinds of “mysterious“ symptoms. I’m sure this video will help MANY who are looking for answers. 🙏
Shared on Facebook.
I think it gets tougher as you get older and you're not willing to be belittled, undermined, gaslit, insulted publicly etc etc. But yes toxicity has become very obvious in most work environments these days.
@@BillClinton228 When I was in my teens & 20s, there was no internet, and thus no social media as sources of quality info. In a world where narcs rule & design it to benefit only other narcs, I was always puzzled as to why people were the way they are-it was like living in a parallel universe.
I never questioned whether I was wrong, since I’d always produced desirable results & was intuitively drawn to what’s healthy & effective, but I thought it so strange that I was amongst these “sleeping” creatures who all seemed to understand each other implicitly, despite being wholly toxic & ineffective.
Most people in the mainstream seem to conflate “majority rules” with being right, never questioning the reality of the world being full of broken people with broken practices.
You are the 1st video that describes every aspect of the hellhole I just quit after 3 days! You can't imagine how many people might feel validated hearing this precious video!! Thank you!! Most other videos barely touch the surface & just repeat what others have said!! Fyi know it all recruiters are not working on the floors with patients in high risk skeletal crew places!!
My job is literally every single one of your talking points in the video. And yes, I can attest that a job like this spills over into every aspect of your personal life. It’s horrible.
I think top-down leadership is very important because that's how bad patterns are accepted. I noticed even when someone high in command wants to do something that is counter to a good workplace the owner is striving for, the manager will be overruled.
There's a channel called "Workplace Bullying Institute" that's a great source and they recommend going two steps above a bully being usually the bully has charmed those bosses near themselves. An example here is how a lead and a supervisor may be charmed by a worker bully but someone higher may not give any space for that behavior.
Nice in theory. Unfortunately, my bully is the CFO and her flying monkey attack dog.
I'm still in court against my exemployer - extreme manipulative toxic working environment. When I quit, I got attacked by slander and libel. Unfortunately, it coincided with COVID. I'm destroyed
A lot of what you describe is what my work environment was like -
Very, very accurate explanation! Wish I had this to watch years ago!!
Personal Improvement Plans! These play a huge role in toxic workplaces. PIPs are, of course, a well-recognised punishment, bullying and dismissal tool, and they can be quite Kafkaesque. They may also be used cynically to block promotions or force demotions, and deny an end-of-year bonus to an otherwise top performer.
I agree I found that “ Personal Improvement plans “ are nothing to do with your personal improvement but just a way for your manager to make negative comments about you and prevent you from another further promotion/ Bonus
Last week I got fired from a job that fit every single one of those 9 criteria. I want to make it clear, that I am not proud of getting fired. However, I believe I got out at the perfect time before I got in too deep. An additional red flag that just did not make me feel warm and fuzzy, tracking my work phone off work hours and on weekends. I guess that falls into the blurring of work and personal life. But unfortunately a lot of this stuff doesn't show itself until you are hired. Biggest suggestion, do not work for a small family company.
Talk to an attorney
This is so true. When I had a toxic workplace, everyone took advantage of that and made home toxic also for me. It was getting worse as time went on. I trusted people at home to share what was going on at work with them, but I didn't really know who they actually were themselves. It's so ironic how I've been duped my whole life under the protected umbrella of family rights & responsibilities. Ever since I've slowly come to reality, it's gotten worse at home, unfortunately. They live under my roof, free room & board. They have no respect for me or my property or ny things & they won't accept the middle ground in any situation & it's like they have got me blocked & squared in by diminishing any connections & help I had by emotionally pulling me into their drama series & alienating me from the outside world. I'm always to blame. If they could, they would probably blame me for Adam & Eve's mistake & tell me everyone is in this hell hole because of me 😐
I hope that this prolonged state of “purgatory” won’t be the final chapter in your life story. May the lessons be gleaned, and access & opportunities for a brighter life open up for you. 🙏
@@MoPoppins I hope so too. But my approach this time would be diplomatic so I can intellectually go about all of this mess thus lowering the chances of backlash towards my property & my well being. I've received all sorts of threats left & right for a few years now from people known & stranger to me. If they don't understand the language of love, empathy & open communication, perhaps they will understand me when I treat them like strangers taking up too much of my time. TY for the words of wisdom 💜
Hope you are doing better now 4 months later in September 2023
You just described every job I've ever had here in the USA. I've been in the Senior level and Executive level for decades and every single company from small to Fortune 50, have these work environments.
Same here!
Absolutely.
Dr. Magee I've learned so much from you for the past 3yrs, you truly are a God sent 👍🏻 TY 😊Please do a video on how to handle such a toxic work environment & how to conduct oneself when faced with cut throat options which not only makes one accept responsibility for something they didn't do/say or face being fired/dismissed. I was taken by surprise & made to sign pre-printed paperwork a few minutes before the end of my shift when I couldn't afford to lose my job. I was told, "Don't worry, you have two more strikes left. Just accept it & I'll work with you to make things better by talking to the regional & clarifying the misunderstandings going forward. Things just escalated from there onwards, it gotten to a point where two manager later in a short while orders were being yelled at me, I was being belittled, blamed, harrased, tormented in front of customers & coworkers during work hours & one on one when alone closing up. At one point I felt unsafe so I decided to walk outside the premises I was aggressively yelled at to get back in or I was going to be reported to head office for not adhering to authority & not following safety & security protocols 😐 after dropping off this at the bank together I called the regional & he too didn't want to hear it or help me. At the time I felt like he didn't believe me, but later, after my employment was done there, I truly felt like this whole scheme was his own plan & doing with the help of my manager & other staff members who wanted me gone.
Remember & always be aware that some people (i.e., narcs) always need a SCAPEGOAT. Karma dictates that we remain in a certain state or place until we learn the lessons we’re meant to, but do try to VISUALIZE & experience in your mind’s body what you DO want, so you can reverse-engineer it, or have it come to pass, as the universe coordinates the various moving parts in the world to conspire its conclusion.
Sometimes, endings are meant to bring new beginnings, but there are “slots” for things to pull into, like parking spaces. If that space is already occupied, you aren’t allowing new energy & new opportunities to flow into your life. Wishing you all the best. 🙏✨💕
@MoPoppins true, even though it was extremely hard I did this for employment situation because they were in the bigger sense strangers. The fear of losing everyone & everything & visualizing to start from scratch doesn't leave ones mind when having repetitive negative behaviour out of no fault of one's own. Worst part is any connection I had in the outside have all dissolved due to narcissists from within. This directly impacts how we see, interpret & make sense of the world around us & ultimately how we manage to solve life's issues as they come along the way. I'll keep your words in minf & let's see what I can do going forward if things go south again.
@@myjourneytotruth When situations escalate to the point where it breaks us in some way, THAT’s when we literally have to move on, regardless of whether we’ve secured anything better for purely practical reasons (like being able to continually pay the rent/mortgage, utilities, car payments, gas, etc.). I hope it doesn’t come to that, for you, but do take heed of all the SIGNS you receive from the universe, whether it’s dead ends, sabotage, gut feelings, symptoms of dis-ease in the body, and so on. 🙏
Facts! All of them.
Describes our former church - all leadership +some of the staff, along with my former employer(who was also independent contractor at said church)
2 of my bosses often enjoyed humiliating me in front of customers.
They would make a scene and let someone else cover the cash register while they would stand there and verbally abuse me.
That same boss liked to casually mention termination if everything wasn't his way. I worked so hard I was sweating all over and breathing hard.
Just found your channel, Darren! Happy New Year 2024!!
Abvsolutely on point. Thank you . People need to know these things for lack of compass in general. Company policy of this sort does not inspire me to anything but withdrawal.
I had this at my old job. I had 2 bullied above me in mgmt. to the point that I got passed over for a job. I presented my outstanding resume and did not even get an interview. I presented the identical resume to the market and got a large psy rise and going 2 steps up the mgmt ladder. I was told that I was paid well and what I was worth. I looked after my company and made good decisions. I was ranted at for avoiding a potentially embarrassing thing for my company. The mgr that was above me told me that he submitted a position description change to my job (no consultation with me) he was told that what he wrote was too close to his position description. He literally told me about this. He constantly made fun of female team members. He was given the job above me with zero know knowledge of job he had to do. I had my work plagiarised. I even got so scared to promote myself I begged a senior manager friend not to put my name on a presentation I made for her, because I feared being dragged over the coals for helping. He also made fun of the women in my team and I defended them. I got put on the spot for this too.
I am agree and relate of this issue. Finally, this topic validate my own experience.
THANK YOU!!! I needed a reality check!! Wonderful of you!
My entire workplace went fully remote after the 2020s. It seems like many of these toxic characteristics were amplified when that happened. Would be interesting to see some videos about how remote work can affect toxicity in the workplace.
Yup, many toxic coworkers and managers are emboldened in being abusive when they can do so from a distance. Horrible behavior in teleconferences, nasty text messages and emails, stonewalling etc. all facilitated by the ability to push Send and not deal with their victim face to face. I don't get how people are so in denial about this.
I've worked at TOXIC workplaces all of my life from Saverite until they went out of business to the US post office that had me working 7 days a week being a city carrier assistant. I resigned from 7 YEARS AGO and there was so much backstabbing and managers that spread gossip that if you had trouble on a route, you would hear it from a coworker bullying you talking about how the company needed to fire you in addition to being written up and being RUSHED on the routes. Some manager at a station around the corner from my Mom's house, who claimed to be christian used me because she was leaving messages on my phone and calling me in on my off days.
Being held to a "different standard ", a very narcissistic boss who thinks public humiliation is an HR tactic, words vs actions never really line up (regarding raises), exclusionary tactics regarding workload,breaks,etc. These are some of the issues ever present in a toxic workplace. The speed of the leader is the speed of the team. When the leader is bogging the team down, the team disintegrates
I really enjoyed this video, very interesting thank you
I’ll listen to this at work. :D
😂😂
OMG the company im leaving now has ALL of these signs you mentioned ! Worst workplace ever !
All of the above in my immediate situation of employment.....Unfortunately it appears to be the common dynamic of the modern day work force.....I've looked for other jobs and they actually seem to be worst than my current job.
If you are a good salesperson, work for YOURSELF, NOT FOR ANOTHER. Chances are, due to greed, the boss will work you to build his business and then let you go. Often with him owing you commissions.
Clive Boddy has written a book on corporate bullying and psychopaths in the workplace .
God every single point describes perfectly my work place.
Creating an environment that sets up an subordinate to fail in order to justify the label of an incompetent employee seems to me to dovetail with a covert narcissist leadership style and capitalism driven desire to pay the least possible.
The concept of a team effort is counter productive in such an environment. The lack of good faith and clear boundaries/responsibilities serves to perpetuate abuse.
Thank you immensely for this video. 🙏🏼
1) cliques that exclude others and ignore them
2) poor listening 👂 skills
3) lying and blaming others and an atmosphere of fear
4) unreasonable expectations
5) lack of development or growth within the organization.
6) no motivation
7) high turnover of staff like at Walmart
8) only feedback people get is negative feedback
9) bullying and threatening behavior
I worked for a workplace like this in the past.
You described the work environment I have been subjected to for 17 years without realising. It has affected me physically n mentally. I want to leave but have not found another job
These workplaces carry on the same when you leave because they know no better. Best to leave quietly and never look back. You might get lucky and find a better situation but the experience has value. You cannot stop it but you can learn to handle it.
An always necessary topic!
Very useful video! Please do record another one on this subject when you have time 👍
The first sign I noticed was high employee turnover, which resulted in the company being understaffed and employees getting overworked and burned out to the max. Then it was favoritism and "clicks" with management and certain employees. Then it was lack of feedback, support and further training. By the end, it was increase of "metrics2 and PIPs, isolation from others due to not "fitting in" the work culture (aka, their clicks) and seeing my incompetent ass kissing co-worker get promoted over me. That was my last straw, so I left.
I could write a book based on my toxic workplace experiences. Until then I simply help ppl by talking about it on my page.
Can you share how to survive in this type of toxic working environment on another video. I was in a similar situation & finally it all blew up, I am not there anymore & there is bad beliefs about me so lost all friends
Diet and exercise, focusing on yourself. Block these people out and keep trying to progress.
Yes first sign I'm not even included in the group chat of work and the management decision is that,i heard her saying behind my back that k must not be in that group and in front of my face she fakes nice and that it's fine about me not being the group yet as the last arrived and for less time experience there worker, I've been there for more than 4 months already and i heard that all the others that when they first came they were soon added in the group unlike me
I had a toxic boss call me up after I quit the job threatening to take me to court for slander I ask him what he was talking about he said I told 2 employees there he would come to my house and drag me to work. I told him on the phone iam sorry he felt this way and blocked his number
Holy shit ive never seen one these where my (soon former) company keeps checking off EVERY box.
Special treatment for one person. They get to kick off break rules with no consequences. Making threats if you dont do xyz ill leave
An accident looking for a place to happen. I was called that by a boss.
Amazing video. You got every point perfect.
I think ostracism is a type of bully in a sikent way and by that making the other feel uncomfortable and unwelcome
Small Home Health Care companies ran outside of the United States of America and some within the US! Watch out healthcare workers and always check the company reviews by the dates they were written and check out if possible who are the managers and their backgrounds! Do not waste your time on BS companies EVER!😊✨🍀
How can you identify a healthy work environment in a job interview? It's been my experience that the vast majority of employers are dishonest in job interviews and don't tell you what you really want to know.
Ah, most software companies I've ever worked at
Software industry is quite toxic. Owing to rapid growth of the sector management tends to be a bit amateurish. It’s a young industry after all. People who shouldn’t be managing anyone rise to positions of power as companies expand. Another phenomenon that leads to bad management is “the Dead Sea effect “, whereby the least competent get promoted because they stick around the longest in one firm, while the better employees move on. Perverse incentives also lead to toxic cultures. Short term expedience resulting in long term technical debt issues, which in turn leads to a stressed out workforce. Hiring practices are also deeply flawed…the whiteboard crucible!
They all have cliques.
🍃💜🌷💜🍃
Love the garland you created there-such a pretty combo! 💕
I second that emotion, Mo(ther).
Lol aren't they all toxic, so what is the point 🤔 in leaving, you leave that toxic job only to be hired at another, we just have to face the elephant in the room, we as people are toxic, for people that have autism and can work my suggestion is to only stay for a few years if you can manage that because you will find that you will be the target of some sociopath or narcissistist that is power hungry so they will need someone to throw under the bus to make them shine 😉 and ✋️ we autistic people are always the weakest links because of our inability to connect and make friends. This is why you need to protect yourself.
Sick world
the Narcissist Army is coming to take me a way, ha ha hee hee
Dan, what is the purpose of life?
To worship God, do good deeds and achieve paradise.
@@zahra1308 what is paradise?
@@symbolsandsystems Paradise or garden in Islam-is described in the Quran as an eternal afterlife of peace and bliss, where the faithful and righteous are rewarded. The Quran says the righteous will be restful in the presence of God, in "gardens beneath which rivers flow." The word "Jannah" (Paradise) comes from an Arabic word that means "to cover or hide something." Heaven, therefore, is a place that is unseen to us. Paradise is the final destination in the afterlife for good and faithful Muslims.
@@zahra1308 heaven is to want reality
cliques not clicks. lol.
Darren, you have described exactly the workplace I am working. I am already suffering anxiety and stress disorders because of that and currently on sick leave. Every morning I wake with dull nerve pains on my chest and back because of this. Please, tell me how dangerous it is keeping working at such a place, and does it worth working there if salary is a little higher than average salary in the city ?
# 1 Sign , it's a work environment .