Best of Michael's Misquotes - The Office US
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 มิ.ย. 2024
- 'That's sort of an oaky after-birth....'
All the times Michael Scott would try words and phrases that were way out of his vocabulary
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"Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice, strike three." Is actually a good quote tho
@ken wesaw Bush said "Fool me once, shame on ... shame on you. Fool me... You can't get fooled again!'"
Yeah, I always wondered, what is the correct version of that quote? Because I’ve definitely heard something like that before, I’m just not sure exactly what it is because all I remember is the Michael Scott version.
Nathan Vanderpool “fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me”
ken wesaw very funny... it posted twice for some reason.
Catdog10Films fool me once shame on thee, fool me twice, shame on me
"My mind is going a mile an hour."
"That fast?"
A Jim-style burn courtesy of his soulmate.
one of my favorites, she says it so nonchalantly as well lmao
Ironically i have to think a sec to understand that..😐
Pam occasionally dishes out brilliant burns and they're always so shocking because she's usually so polite. It's like when the kid who threw stuff at her came in and called her fat because she had just had a baby and she said "how about we wait until next year when you have your kid?" Brilliant character.
Jim is rubbing off on Pam, LOL. Pam isn't usually like that.
Delivery’s all wrong, she’s butcherin it
i love how angela says “amen” when michael says that stanley is going to hell for adultery when she has commuted adultery SEVERAL times
lol@commuted...
A nod to you, good person.
She was the biggest hypocrite
Nope she wasn’t married
She wasn’t married but still yeah fs that’s a good point
“Not necessary, the party planning committee is all over it. They’ve been working 24/7 all day yesterday.“
-Micheal Scott
Jan: I underestimated you Michael
Michael: well, maybe next time you’ll estimate me
wait but...live and let live is an actual saying lol, yet it was in this video, i guess the guy who runs this channel doesnt even get the joke lol
Deadspace493 I guess that your guess is a guess
@@russBwright you should tolerate the opinions and behavior of others so that they will similarly tolerate your own. (thats the meaning, not a guess
AHHAHA
@@DeadSpacedOut Yea but "live and let die" is more commonly used
I love that he mixes up ‘wedding’ and ‘welding’.
And "metals" with "medals"
This is gonna sound dumb but I never even thought that he messed that up
I had to watch that scene twice to realize what he did
Why did you feel a need to explain it?
The Simpson made a similar joke, when Homer was a teacher
Michael: “Erin, scissor me”
Erin throws a pair of scissors to Michael
Pam is speechless
🤣🤣🤣🤣
lmfaoooooooooo that's actually one of the funniest scenes in the whole show idk why 😭😭😭
I was actually pretty impressed!!
@@mattslupek7988 no seriously, how many times did they have to practice that? I’m assuming they were prop scissors but geez, Carell could’ve lost a finger lol
@@eileensnow6153 in the office ladies podcast Jenna says they didn’t tell her that was going to happen, she thought they were throwing a real pair of scissors and they got a genuine reaction
“My MiNd Is GoInG a MiLe An HoUr”
“that fast?”
LMFAAOO I CAANNNTTT
I actually kinda like it as a saying. It’s like saying that you’re so stressed that your mind has just shut down
Literally one of the best written characters of all time.
And delivereded as well.
Nick Gagliano you’re comparing TS, and WW to Michael? Lol you’re reaching to seem smart. Also, you’re not supposed to stand Michael. Thats the point, in reality he would be a shit person but it’s just a show, don’t take it so deep. 🤣
Nick Gagliano it’s just a show. Chill out. People adore michael just like others adore murderers like WW and TS but to each his own. Like i said it’s just a show, i really hate how people like you get so invested into made up reality.
Nick Gagliano he’s not the greatest to you but you’ll sit and watch a comp of his character. 🤣
@@Username-2
That's what seashell
My personal favorite:
“Would I rather be feared or loved, um both, I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”
Yes!
This one is actually amazing
It reminds of the iron man quote
Same. 😅
What about Micheal's philosophy?
_don't ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone for any reason, ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who or who you were with or where you are going or where you've been, ever, for any reason whatsoever_
I was so caught up in the surprise that he got "complicit" correct that I completely missed him immediately dropping "you were all successories"
this one in also missing
Karen - "you're being misogynistic"
Micheal - "yes, thank you!"
Karen - "umm, I mean you're being sexist"
Micheal - " No..that's insane, I'm being misogynistic"
same thing!! 😂😂
"Too much change is not a good thing, ask the climate" - M. Scott
what episode?
@@originalname28 S6 episode 15, sabre
Rainn Wilson would be very proud of Michael
@@luciamerendino5580 Yeah 👍🏻:)
GODDAMMIT BARB
My favorite is Michael driving with Lady Gaga's "Just dance" and then saying : "It's Britney, bitch!" ^^! Simple yet hilarious..
salladinthegreat he has a hard time matching artists with their songs. Like when he gave Darryl a list of songs to play for when he was featuring Springsteen tix to auction but most of them was Huey Lewis and the News.
salladinthegreat “a tip is that you can pump to the beat of staying alive” “first I was afraid...I was petrified”
I never got it. Can someone explain?
The Wild Child which one ?
@@shr.9119 he's mixing up "Staying alive" with "I will survive"
"Nobody would heed, of... Wha-te-heeded, heeded of-"
"Hed. Hed."
"When no one hedded"
"Take hedded of"
"No one would take hedded of my instructions."
"Heed."
"So-you"
"Take heed"
"I don't see my co-workers"
"Take heed of"
"Hee-heeding... this right now."
👏👏👏
Jessica Bader wait, what.
😂
This is the best one.
Had me laughing when I saw this episode, he just went in a circle not saying anything
I still don't know which was correct...
The “oaky afterbirth” line was the perfect way to start off this compilation
“Sometimes I’ll start a sentence and I don’t even know where it’s going. I just hope I find it along the way” - *Michael Scott*
Jacky Ochoa my favorite lol
like an improv conversation
Tbh that's how I talk XD
Me writing an essay in school
"Hindsight is 50-50. It's not all peaches and roses. I tips my hat off to em." - Blacks.
"Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone for any reason ever, no matter what, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been.... ever, for any reason whatsoever."
-Michael Scott
erkelnomically kerrect
"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
-Wayne Gretzky"
-Michael Scott
Sometimes I start a sentence and I don’t even know where it’s going, I just hope I find it along the way
@@josiee14 (to)*
Pikachu Comments greatest quote ever spoken😂
It's missing this one:
Michael: "I hit her on company property, with company property, so, double jeopardy, we're fine."
Ryan: "I don't think you understand how jeopardy works."
Michael: "Oh, I'm sorry, what is "we're fine"?"
That one was hilarious!!!
Just so you know when putting a quote within another quote it is grammatically correct to clarify the inner quote with single quotation marks ‘ ‘ rather than regular quotation marks “ “.
@@jaredschmidt8013 English grammar is hard okay
@@nolanyoung160
That’s what she said.
@@jaredschmidt8013 It's also acceptable to use directional commas and choose either double or single quotes, provided the font you're using has them. Usually if you were going to do this you would seperate the quoted text into a new paragraph and you would only do it for longer quotes.
I think using quotes the way the OP did is technically correct (in a serif font) but I agree that it isn't as clear.
Imagine a situation where you wanted to quote somebody, who was quoting somebody, who's quote included anothe quote. Would you alternate between single and double quotes? (You can but don't need to)
It's not all that common an occurance, but you certainly see it in printed text. Semi colons and colons can also help to seperate quotes within quotes which is useful in sans serif fonts for smaller quotations.
Michael's white board for example: ""You miss 100% of the shots you don't take"
- Wayne Gretzky"
I'm quite sure that unless you're writing an essay for school that you can quote whichever way you like as long as there are the same number of opening quotation marks as their are closing ones.
I cannot stop reading the title as ‘Micheal’s Mosquitoes’
Same
Me too!
Thats fitting
A misquote in and of itself lol
Same lol
“His last name is christ, he has the power of flight, he can heal leopards”
@Joey G No, that's not it. Check your facts before correcting others you fool.
That part cracks me tf up. I swear he was meaning to say leper but said leopards. I love him sm 😂😂
@Kevin Estrada yes m8 *lepers- a person who has leprosy. The joke is that Michael said he heals leopards instead of lepers 😂🤦
@Chick Magnet Joe it's flight.
@Kevin Estrada lepers**
"I am an early bird and a night owl, so I am wise and I have worms"
noobmaster69 lmao
Early worm gets the worm
Stop bothering Korg, okay?
Who's your worm guy
Space force
"It wasn't a disgruntled employee, Jan. Everyone here is extremely gruntled."
That's an actual word
That's a real word
i think thats a word tho
i think it's from pg wodehouse.
"Stanley was attacked by his own heart" 😂😂😭cold as ice 😆"No rest for the sick".....poor Stanley..
"Wedding - The fusing of two metals with a hot torch"
Metaphorically, he is right.😬
Dani Paunov I like how he trips up twice in one moment
Gold metals!!
Gold Medals
Blew over my head my first 2 watches...
“Tell him to call me asap as possible”
I never noticed that one!
Jaylen & Keshia I’m 1 thousands like
I noticed that
Smh my head
ATM machine
"Betrayal isn't just a river in africa"
- Micheal Scott
"No rest for the sick." That line is genius but the delivery is geniuser. 🤣
Lololololol!!!
Nice
"A sort of micro management"
"Jim whats the word?"
"Microgement"
Celestial BBX boom.
I thought he said MicroJiment
Hilarious!!
BUTTLICKER! OUR PRICES HAVE NEVER BEEN LOWER!
lmao
“I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious”
Edit:6.9k *nice*
is that MF DOOM on your profile pic?
My favorite quote by Michael Scott 😂
@Sam Boykin yes
Quieres The correct quote would be “I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.”
No Name Selected great
"Well, well, well. hOw ThE tUrN tAbLeS"
- Michael Scott
And erin is literally Michael's daughter when she said "penile softiosis"
Sounds like a Harry Potter spell
Michael - “The early worm gets the worm.”
Jim - “Another worm?”
Chad Law “are they friends?”
😂😂😂😂😂
"are they like, friends?"
Chad Law 2
Early bird gets the worm an I'm the muthafuckin worm
Sort of an oaky afterbirth
What was that?
@@dawgsfan1196 The correct term was aftertaste
@@sandmantan I know. That was what Jim said right after Michael said afterbirth
@@dawgsfan1196 oh shit you're right
@@dawgsfan1196whats funny is afterbirth means placenta
You missed "home is where the hardest" - that one was one of the funniest ever
he didnt say that one is right actually.
That’s what she said
@@dhruvsbeloved what?
@@Mark-sj3xb
You took my line!!
"I KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING"
"do you?"
"no"
“The prod - the prog-idal - my son returns...” lol
Michael just giving up on the quote is just phenomenal. And Jim going "wat" just makes it better.
Progiddle
“Jim Halpert is smudge and arrogant”
“I think you mean smug”
“Arrogance”
😂
Austin Burke ...and there's the smudgeness
You forgot the other part smh
you forgot when he talked again and michaels like "theres our smudgeness"
and there's our smudgeness
"Fool me once, strike one.
Fool me twice, strike... three"
He actually made it sound a tiny bit cool there :D
"She's an anorexitic"
- We should do something
"Nothing can be done. Just have to tell everyone and hope for the best."
"My mind is going a mile an hour"
"That fast, huh?"
Lol I love when Pam plays along.
Xavier Cortinaz Yes lol
Wait is it meant to be ‘a thousand miles an hour’?
Peyton Gomer that’s the joke
Ty Uzumaki yeah I just didn’t know if that was what the joke was
@@peytongomer2305 He probably means a mile a minute
"Several times a day, Michael says words that are WAY beyond my vocabulary."
"Oh, i know where this is going!"
"Do you?"
"No."
Blisters lmaoo
Cut off your nose to spiderface
"Ok"
Bob Vance almost cracking up during Michael’s welding speech haha 😂
I love that Pam is just cool with explaining what "run amok" means and repeating it in the easier phrasing on Michael's request
That is only the first part, it doesn't have the part when he tries to use the phrase later!
they didn’t include my personal favorite-
“phyllis, a woman, has uslurped my role as santa”
Also missed out the thirty five hundred line.
How about the 100 point of views in the surplus episode
@@mattieasems6902 that wasnt a misquote
would you rather die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become Toby
Kept waiting for my favorite “how the turn tables....” lmaaooo
sAMEE. It cracks me up every damn time lmaooo
same here
Yesssss!!!! One of my faves!
8:07
DJ Dresen z
Michaels even funnier when you realize he’s always tried to cheer the office up in his own mind but rarely does😭😂
“You miss 100% of the shots you don't take - - Michael Scott”
“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take”.
Wayne Gretzky,
Michael Scott
Fan vid
th-cam.com/video/K-NFgkDUBL0/w-d-xo.html
Adrian Mendoza fuck you
im the 1k person who liked this
Asinine I'm the first one to like your comment
oh damn
I think you forgot "Our balls are in your court!" 😂
No he didn't
Yes I remember this 🤣🤣
It’s in the video
And "If we were in a bar, there would be 2 punches. Me punching you and you hitting the floor."
This is destroying my self taught English, but it's a price I'm willing to play.
I saw whatcha did there!!!! Lololololol
lmao i say what you did there
“Well, well, well, how the turntables...” (can’t think of the quote, decides to give up on the quote altogether)
The one quote Michael never misquotes: "That's What She Said"
Abhiraj Except for the time he was learning Spanish and Oscar said his office was covered in genitalia and Michael said “That’s what he said” in Spanish hahaha
@@UnorthodoxMasterOfGames Facts! :)
@@RajMcBoss I think I'm gonna watch The Office from the start for a 2nd run-through, it's even more funny this time around watching these clips!
except for eso es lo que dice el...
"That's what he said! Right guys, cuz of gay?"
_"R-E-S-P-SPEE-T."_
*"FIND OUT WHAT IT MEANS TO ME."*
"He can heal leopards" LMAOOOOOOOOOOO
I love how the actor who plays Bob Vance (Vance Refrigeration) has to stifle a laugh at wedding/welding.
“He heals leopards...”
No
😂😂😂😂
I mean
It’s not like he can’t
He has the piwer of flight
Holy schnikes I just got that after reading it! Lol!
"I will give you a hint. His last name is Christ, he has the power of flight...
he can heal leopards"
"I am downloading some n3p music"
Jim:"that's not it"
So close all he needed to do was change that N to an M then you can download some music
My favorite is when he says “You were complicit” and then looks at Jim for validation and Jim just shakes his head and walks off 😂
"They're trying to make me the escape goat" LOL
skylilly1 I actually heard someone say this once irl.
Me too!
Scape goat comes from Escape goat
I don't get it...why's that saying wrong? English is not my native language, sorry
@@caiofreire2854 You're supposed to say "Scapegoat", which is a person blamed for the wrongdoings or mistakes of others. In that scene, Michael says "Escape Goat" which would basically be a goat 🐐 that you will use to escape from somewhere.
“You know, Pam, in Spain, they usually don’t start eating until midnight.”
“When in Rome.”
Emily Rose you look like that icarly girl... or is it me??
@@crissanchez9043 That's because the picture is the iCarly girl.
Michael - "My mind is going a mile an hour"
Pam - "That fast?“
Yus!
Pam's face when she says "Michael" is totally a mother trying to not lose her cool with their obnoxious kid 😂😂
There will never be another sitcom like this one... I miss it. 😪
Sheryl Speaks everyone misses it
Not necessarily. I knew a few people who didn't care for the show at all. When I found out, I stopped talking to them. 😂😂
It's not as good as the office but if you havent watched it yet I recommend parks and recreation the comedy is similar to the office but it's not on par with Micheal scott
Killjoy GD Yeah, I like that one as well.
Sheryl Speaks parks and rec is a close second
"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious"
Bastien P next time i want you to.. estimate me
one of my favorite lines ever
that was my senior quote
it took me way too long to realize that “cut off your nose to spider-face” was michael trying to say “cut off her nose to spite her face”
I just realized at 1:50 he KEEPS SINKING IN THE CHAIR
Bring some young people into the office, "Youth-enize" this place.
😂😂 He’s an idiot, but I love it😂😂
Jan : Michael I underestimated you
Michael : Well, maybe next time you will estimate me⚡️
Lol
"His kappa was detated from his head" lol
One of my favorites is the convo between him an Oscar when he asks Oscar where he heard about the no commission cap Sabre policy.
Oscar: "Manual"
Michael: "Manuel who?"
Michael Scott: *gets complicit right*
Also Michael Scott: *calls them successories*
lol
I swear the title said michael mosquitoes
That’s what I thought too lol
Same and I thought I missed something I thought it was gonna be another Scott’s tots
Haha I thought that too 😂
I was the hundredth like congratulations
I totally saw that too!
"I know it's illegal in Pennsylvania but it's for charity, and I consider myself a great philanderer."
Freudian slip, Michael?
“ASAP as possible.”
“I wouldn’t say this to her face but she’s a wonderful person and a gifted artist”
“Why why wouldn’t you say that to her face”
@@pastorw.f.kumuyi1240 wtf
@@jacobibarra097 Ignore it and it might go away.
@@pastorw.f.kumuyi1240 hail satan
@krvnjrcbs it is relevant because they could’ve put it in because he used the saying wrong
@krvnjrcbs “I wouldn’t say this to their face” is a saying dipshit
*”HO HO CONTRAPTIONS, SHE’S CONTRAPTING”*
~ Michael Scott
"No Dwight, Respect! R-E-S-P-SVE-D. Find out what that means to me!"
“I know where this is going!”
“Do you?”
“No”
Peter olds sums up school in 3 lines
You know what they say. Fool me once, strike one. But fool me twice..... strike three
Hahaha Mean either
Still makes more sense than Bush 😂😂
th-cam.com/video/eKgPY1adc0A/w-d-xo.html
fool me once, fool me twice, fool me chicken soup with rice
first thing I thought of...haha
That's my motto for life
Have watched The Office countless times, and I just noticed Michaels certificate of authenticity for his Seyko timepiece. 😂
My favorite is : "Betrayal isn't only a river in Egypt"
The oaky afterbirth scene is why I never go to wine tastings.
Eda Akb what did he mean by that?
Marko Gonzalez he meant the wine had an oaky aftertaste 😂😂
Marko Gonzalez and afterbirth is something very disturbing when you talk about taste lmao.
So like after an oak tree giving birth?
Jasdeep Bindra afterbirth is what is leftover in a women’s uterus after giving birth....aka the placenta. Like I said. It’s very disturbing when it’s being talked about taste....
"I went to the park to feed the pigeons.
Apparently they all moved west for the winter."
Sochi Kai Pigeons aren't even migratory in the first place.
They Missed The One Where He Says "We Are Migrating Like a Heard or Flock of Turtles"
Where was this?
Sochi Kai During The Episode Where David Sends Michael to Train The Other Branches, So He Can Teach The Other Branches How His Own Branch is Very Successful, He Says It in A Scene Where He and Pam Leave Their Hotel Rooms
"No rest for the sick."
Michael's brain is a paradox within another paradox...
“Ticking time bags.” 🤣🤣
Michael: (Walks in at last minute) What’s so funny?
Pam: You had to have been there.
Michael: Oh, a geography joke.
Not last minute, they woke him up from sleep at 16:50, although it was around 13 or something
"Oh the turntables."
how the tables have turned*
Karen Filipelli You'd know all about getting the tables turned on you amiright Karen? Sorry.
Karen Filipelli you're not the real Karen. I'm 99% sure.
That is my favorite one
The MEJ nope she is definitely the real Karen.
0:20 anyone who has had a girl that they've been in love with rest their head on their shoulder for the first time knows that it's literally one of the best feelings in the entire world
ABSOFRICKINLUTELY!! Greatest feeling EVER!!
Steve Carrel as Micheal Scott is honestly the only celebrity I have great respect for and have so much joy and comfort to thank. I've cried for hours and the only thing that gives me comfort unconditionally is the office and especially Michael (and Dwight/Jim).
I know he won't see this but THANK YOU! To everyone who helped produce this (David Brent) and Steve for creating this heart warming character.
"Well that's easy for you to say. You have a bad imagination, it's stupid. I live in a fantasy world." - Michael Scott
He wasn't wrong...
"You do!! :)"
Just gonna leave this here for myself
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
0:00 Oaky Afterbirth
0:14 Colored Greens
0:36 Tickin' Timebags
0:59 The Prodigal Son
1:10 Wedding Definition
1:29 Live and let live
1:37 Drop a deuce
1:47 Erklnomical chair
2:06 Take heed
2:41 No rest for the sick
2:56 Spiderface
3:14 Flew west for the winter
3:33 Not to be truffled with
3:44 I live in a fantasy world
3:59 Fool me twice, strike 3
5:00 Escape Goat
5:40 Mind runnin a mile an hour
5:55 Complicit successories
6:39 I have your baguette
6:49 HE-L-L double hockey sticks
7:17 He can heal leapords
7:25 She's contrapting
7:30 Like I'm gonna believe one of his spermed lovers
7:41 Blair witch hunt project
7:46 Capital punishment
7:55 Ouija board
8:07 How the turn tables
8:15 Smudge and arrogant
8:20 Philanderer
8:34 A little stitious
8:49 ASAP as possible
8:53 Respect
9:08 M3P
9:24 Women are ununderstandable
9:31 She's an anorexitic
MVP
Nice man. Good job.
I don’t get the spider face one
You're a real MVP valuable player. Keep it up.
@@dylana7752 it's meant to be spite her face, but Micheal said spider face
“Oaky after birth” just murders me every single time
"Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice, strike three" is actually a badass quote.
Well well well, how the turntables...
Karen Filipelli I think you misquoted
ThreeSidedTriangle one of my favorites 🤣🤣🤣
you didn't get the joke, huh.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
You forgot to put the one where Michael quotes lines from the Taxi Driver and then says 'Raging Bull. Pacino.'
I always fucking crack up at 3:18 “Hey...why are you wearing a turtleneck?”
“CONTRAPTIONS SHES CONTRAPTING” 😂
“THIS IS LIKE THE BLAIR WHICH HUNT PROJECT”
💀💀😂😂
"You were in the parking lot earlier, that's how I know you!"
- a wise man
we had a funeral for a bird
Karen Filipelli "I'm pretty sure none of that's real." Get it right!
1:30 Actually this exact saying, "Live and let live", does exist and here in Italy it's a very common saying
it is cpmmon everywhere, since guns n roses has a great song titled live n let die
It was an actual policy both sides used in the early parts of World War I
You are right! I thought it was only an italian saying, but it seems it is a proverb of Dutch origin, used in a lot of languages