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7 Simple Steps To Attracting Your SOULMATE (It’s Not What You Think!)
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7 steps to find the love you deserve:
1) self-love (love yourself first & give to yourself what you want to receive from others)
- communication (not what you say, but learn to listen!)
2) Vulnerability (create safe space so they can be vulnerable)
3) Accept and Respect (can you accept them with their values, vision, life style…). Respect their boundaries!
4) Appreciation (understand their love language, words of affirmation )
5) growth (both has to commit to work on themselves individually and together)
6) quality time together (schedule date nights or activities, digital detox!!)
- have meaningful/deep conversations (read books and talk about it) & do Mindfulness activities together
7) Adaptability (flexibility on both sides)
Remember you are Love and you are Loved! love is within you! You just have to find it again!
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Thank you so much, i appreciate your effort with this written notes, especially when I can read it and not disturbing kids nap
Glad it was helpful 🤗@@quiney001
Gracias!!!❤
I read a piece written by a Native American who said find your life purrpose then as you are working towards a purpose you can manifest things into your life
I feel that!!!
So true
“Fall in love” with listening to your partner. Then learning the art of intrigue & understanding your partner.
Yup very true
I am Japanese, and this video reminded me of a time when I was 18 and decided to become someone I am not just to fit in. In Japanese culture, conformity and harmony are highly valued, making it extremely difficult to remain true to oneself. However, I will try again to bring my true self back into the light. Thank you for your inspiring work.
You're welcome, thank you for sharing.
For me, the moment I realized why I was attracting emotionally unavailable men my whole world changed; I was attracting emotionally unavailable men because I was emotionally unavailable to myself.
Hope to attract a man who appreciates that vulnerability is truly about courage, takes inner strength, promotes authenticity and develops trust that leads to deep connection. Along with curiosity, if it is not present, its hard to imagine that a relationship could ever grow and develop in a meaningful, lasting way.
My life long tag line is "I don't know what I dont know, but I will strive to continue discovering."
EXCELLENT THOUGHTS!!
Lewis, I've watched many of your interviews with many incredible people.. this heartfelt, helpful, healing video is my new favourite. You are loved and appreciated by me, my friend.
Thank you!
I second that! Much love and many blessings to you!
❤
Your authenticity. Much respect brother.
At 55 yrs old now, after being married for 25 yrs & now divorced for 10 yrs this is the best advice I’ve heard. My ex lived a double life (quite well I must admit) and told me that I wasn’t enough for him and I have carried that with me for the past 10 yrs. I’m currently single bc of exactly what you are saying… thank you for this reminder.
You're welcome! Thanks for watching.
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I love the part where u talked about how we forget that we ARE love! I wanna cry because that’s such a good reminder and so easily forgotten. Thank you❤🙏🏻
You are love indeed!
Just listening to this my eyes have opened up . I never knew my greatest fear and why my relationships have been failing. My greatest fear is ABANDONMENT. I grow up in a broken home. There’s more to my life than this but now I realize what my greatest fear is . ❤
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You will never abandon yourself. Learn how to take care of you.
After my Dad died years later my 70 plus year old Mom found a relationship. Then years later he died and my Mom found another relationship. I asked her how she manifested. She pretty much didn't expect to be in a relationship. My Mom doesn't work on anything you talked about. I think letting go of need for a relationship helps manifest.
“In a relationship you’ve committed to wanting to be there for another.” Beautiful, Lewis! I think many people don’t really think about relationships in that way anymore. Thank you for bringing that to the foreground again. 🙏❤
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
Personal growth is an unending journey that I have been going through for so many years and for the last 3 years I've been more intentional & specific on areas of my life that I need to know and work on them. Listening to you speaking about this subject is music to my ears because you share great insight of things that I need to search in my life. I read the book of the 5 love languages by Gary Chapman in Spanish and it taught me of areas in me that I wasn't aware of. When you get to know yourself more you understand what to accept and not accept in any type of relationship and this includes our own adult children. I love every point you brought up and I enjoyed listening to you. This time was you talking to me directly without a guest and this type of chat is rarely seen. Keep it up Lewis and thank you for giving the best of you to us. You truly deserve Martha as much as she deserves you. A great man for a great woman! ❤
Thank you, can’t wait to share this video with the love of my life, when I meet him 🙏❤
You're welcome! Thanks for watching.
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What i love about your podcast is the way you frame your questions.. It makes the speaker more interested in answering them❤❤❤
Thank you!
These were great reminders all in one video,a to the point conversation. I love when content is given directly without a lot of extra side talk .
I'm doing the work, I'm excited to find the life YOU'VE found. I've spent my life looking, and I think I'm finally on the correct path. So much suffering has brought me tremendous opportunity...and I can see the gifts are waiting for me...juuuust over there. Rolling up my sleeves. Thank you for your inspiration and insights. You rock 😊
Keep up your strength. The work is very tough. There’s a great book called Do The Work. Love and good vibes to you.
Truly powerful. I simply love it! I have actually been practicing your tips and the tools that you have been delivering through your interviews and talks and have to say that I really enjoy the way it has been unfolding. Remarkable. Transformative. Feel my heartfelt and deep gratitude.
Wonderful!
Unfortunately I’ve never dated anyone that I was worried to lose. Still looking for that feeling that I love someone that much that I don’t want to lose them…I value myself and I believe I deserve someone who loves me for everything I have become because I worked on myself for many years and healed myself from the wounds and traumas. I absolutely love myself and I’m very grateful and proud of who I am now.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts!! 🧡
27:56 I’m
You are a treasure!!! Thank you for persevering , for overcoming, thank you for finding the way to become happy because that's how you can now help me and so many people. ❤️
I’m engaged and I’m so glad you created this episode. Perfect timing. Congrats to you and Martha 💕. Lewis you ,Jay & Eckhart Tolle have saved my spirit and life. You’re an inspiration and have helped me through many challenges and brought my awareness back.
Yay! Thank you!
I am excited to continue to do the work until I am ready! I know it will come to me when I am ready! So excited for the new chapter of my life!
Thank you so very much. Your transparency and courage to share from your heart is so brave. It is helping thousands to heal and experience freedom.
You're welcome! Thanks for watching.
I enjoy life-long learning… bliss, abundance, thriving…
Amen, Lewis. I applaud your wisdom and you are blessed to have gained this wisdom at such a young age. It's taken me over 70 years to FINALLY get to where you are. I am forever greatful for this healing journey.
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That agreement is very important I was married for 18 years I tried and tried but when the other person don’t want to grow it will fail eventually or they will just stay for the kids etc but not for love. Growth is a must
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Abandonment for sure. Then Intimacy next because UI have a hard time trusting and opening up and being judged. What's funny is I am so easy to talk to and I do not judge, but I love others stories and learning from them. I have my Masters in Social work and for the most part, disagree with their ideas of theory. SW do not discuss their own lives but what a book says...WRONG. peer support is the best way. Be vulnerable and discuss your strengths and weaknesses...thats the GOLD. LOVE your podcast!! xoxo
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True, I realize that I have a fear of intimacy and put all of my energy into my business to avoid having to worry about my lack in terms of intimacy with others and avoidance of love with myself. In short, I keep myself busy running my business so that I do not have time for anything else.
Happy Valentine’s Day all ♥️ Another great one from Lewis Howes. Thank you for what you do. And making life better for so many of us.
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I definitely have a fear of intimacy for it resulted in me being prideful. And when you are prideful, it causes blocks in your heart where love is supposed to flow from. Its where connection is made brighter as Lewis says in this video. Grateful to have come across this video. Working on it!
Thank You. I am happy to know you found the love of your life. I totally agree and is so true, I have now found the love of my life.
Yes, you should acknowledge your fears as gifts, face them with courage and grow as a result.
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I always love how authentic your podcast always has been
Thank you for being here 🧡
I loved this style of video. Keep it coming. Thanks Lewis 🎉
You're welcome! Thanks for watching.
Love this, i need to connect with myself. I keep choosing unstable relationships. I must be the one thats a problem. Seems almost impossible but people like you sharing their experiences helps know I am not alone!❤ thank you for sharing this
I am excited to do the work, and have greatly appreciated all of this. I follow your podcasts and get all the announcements. I have followed Joe Dispenza for many many years. Through all of his audiobooks, I rebuilt my heart, which I was told could never happen. I’m so glad that you were in one of my banners today to listen to this. I have now shared this with my very best friend. I didn’t tell even what it was, I just shared it so that he hopefully will listen to it. He’s just a very best friend. Thank you for this.
Abandonment, fear of intimate. But confident and outgoing on outside
Thank you Lewis! This was extremely helpful. It helped validate why a recent past relationship was not good for me or viable long term and to release any remaining heartache over it as well as to look forward to continuing to work on myself and to use these very important principles to help cultivate the love I want and deserve. And, to be the best I can be for someone else. I so appreciate you showing up and being vulnerable. You’re awesome ❤
I'm realizing that the biggest problem I had in my relationship was that i feared being inadequate and abandoned. Unfortunately, that's what happened. It's time to work on me, for me!!
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Why can’t we have more men like you 😢 You really are the definition of a perfect man in this world ❤
I needed this message. My relationship has gone horribly wrong of late and we're at a crossroads. The message has given me tools to improve what I bring to the table and how to love myself, whether this relationship succeeds or not.
So happy to hear this was helpful for you!
Abandonment is one I’ve been working on overcoming
Thank you Lewis for all you do and for reminding us all to embrace and love ourselves unconditionally. For accepting who we are and making sure we are solely responsible for our own healing and growth before attracting the abundance of life and love that other people can contribute to life together. I realize that with intentional awareness of being the love itself that is the bridge to connect with others…we are love, we are valuable and we are enough. My heart overflows with gratitude for this amazing message. I wish you and Martha a beautiful Valentine day together. Peace and love❤
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
I feel like TRUE love can only really happen when you are TRUthful and honour who you are authentically. It allows two partners to thrive together, living in truth, love and harmony.♥️
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This is excellent! So brilliantly explained and super helpful concise tips. You are such a gift to so many.
Means a lot!!! Glad this was helpful for you🧡
Thank you so much Lewis, for this helpful and inspiring conversation! If I were to put it in the order of what I'm worried about the most. It would be: 1. Inadequacy 2. Abandonment 3.Intimacy. In regards to vulnerability, that's something I still really need to do more work on.
This was so powerful and a great podcast …. I am love ❤️
thank you Lewis, love it all, super helpful! I'm confident that I'm manifesting my aligned husband and agree with all of this-great tips and ideas thanks! Especially the digital detox date! At least starting with turning the phone off completely during the date (airplane mode) hidden in our pockets. Focusing on each other and the present. Also love the retreats and I'm planning on Joe Dispenza's retreat (first time) in July, I can't wait! I'm a huge fan, really appreciate you and your work! Hugs! 🤩
Everything that you have been saying is absolutely what I was attracting. I think this video and I’ve watched many of your podcasts, is very very helpful to me. I’m going to re-listen to this podcast more than once, and I’m going to take some notes down. I am in the Dating scene, and just realized that all my relationships were not in alignment. Thanks for doing this. I greatly appreciate you.
Glad it was helpful!
Abandonment is my greatest fear, and is exactly what has happened recently after 21 years in my relaionship married for 13 of those years
I am sorry that you are experiencing this. I also have a fear of abandonment. Do you know why your partner decided to leave?
Wow. That is so sad that some women belittle men who are willing to be vulnerable. I'm 63 and divorced and can tell you---if my spouse had been willing to be vulnerable and honest and if I had safe enough to open up myself--we might still be married.
I can not explain how much I am grateful to
You. I am working on myself by a lot of time and now I’m in a phase where I feel so mich love and gratitude and energy and feel ready to continue the journey with someone. I still have to work and I’ll do it, but now I am ready for an armonious and equal relationship and i know
Before wasn’t possible
Because I didn’t love and accept myself, now I know it’s possible 💛
Thank you so much because you (and you and marta as examples), your podcast but mostly You with your truth and vulnerability Made me feel so good, loved, not alone, not crazy and remember me I am worthy. And you help me so
Much to grow…so thank you thank you thank you. Wish you so
Much love. Sara
You're welcome, thank you for being here! 🧡
Love this topic..loving myself 90% And 10% For others...thank u you again for this powerful message
Try mediating for the day when you become a parent 😂 it becomes very hard to do any of those things, especially together
I always have my phone on silent and I leave it at home when I’m with people or in my bag! I believe in giving my full attention to the people I am with, being present and enjoying their company.
Not even 5 minutes in and I already want to cry, cant wait to have such a relationship. I am in a space where I feel like it is not possible. Thank you Lewis
You're welcome!
Man I'm just glad I found your channel. You inspire me and give me hope for a better future relationship
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I am going to do the work for myself to learn to love myself fully It has been a life long challenge for me to accept and love myself not matter what
Pumped for you!
You're awesome Lewis! I wish more men had the courage to do what you've done. You're a great example and role model!
I believe all the steps you talked about but having trouble finding this kind of relationship
Personal growth and how we spend time together
Thank you Lewis I am 52 and going through leaving my husband of 28 years of marriage. I have been analyzing and over analyzing my relationship back and forth and much guidance is from the likes of you, jay shetty and Esther perel podcasts - this has been so helpful in my decision and resolve and so sad as well as helps me understand how our relationship broke down why he behaved as he did why I reacted as I did -thank you -from Lucy in Africa
Wow...yes...become the energy you want to attract
Dear Lewis , I have listened this pod cast on Valentine’s Day sitting alone in my living room. And wanted to thank you as you seem to be perfectly aligned with a certain vibration of the universe and bring messages to us all In a clear easy to understand way. Thank you for this beautiful Valentines gift … love to both of you ❤❤❤
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
Thank you so much Lewis! It was really powerful conversation for me! 👏👏I 'm excited to do the work and find love❤️
You're so welcome!
Thank you! I am ready for the journey!
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Fear of Rejection - is #1 for me; when i don't feel wanted
Thank you Lewis. Resonated with many of the points and examples you shared in this cast. I have turned to face myself daily over the last 7yrs, and it has helped me in many positive ways. I have disrespected myself in ways that I couldn't see, but you have articulated them so it is now clear for me. I appreciate your casts, and am grateful for your insights of this one in particular. Thank you✨🙏✨
Glad you enjoyed it!
What a beautiful video. You are such an inspiration Lewis! 😃 😊 😀 ❤️ 😍 💖
Thank you Lewis. Perfect timing for me. Walking away from something that doesn't serve either of us...and rather than being upset I love what you said....just means I have work to do. Thank you for your inspiration, education and leadership and supporting me...and all who are willing on the path to great.
You're welcome!
Good morning from Switzerland 😊
That is not easy to find, the connection. Gracias por hablar tan bonito , te escucho para mejorar mi inglés, eres lindo😊❤
I am ready to go out there and be the love of my life💗
Love how u meticulously explained everything... Thanks so much I really needed it at this moment
This is amazing! Every sentence is very valuable. Thank you!
You're welcome! 🧡
There are a ton of wonderful lessons here Lewis! 🙏
Lewis, you're an incredible individual! I hope you know that. I love each point youve put together. At my age of 60 it seems hard to find a guy who has been working on himself and reading self-help books/ retreats/ etc. Im looking into going to Joe Dispensas 7 day retreat. Ive already done the online prerequisite. Heart coherence is opening me up. I look forward to implementing these points with a partner. This was an extremely incredible video with your experiences that resonated with me!!❤❤❤❤❤❤
Thanks!
I think this is great information for married couples too, not just for singles! It could really help those headed for divorce. As a widow of 6 years, I can see where this information could have made my marriage better. I'm still hopeful that it'll help me with my next romantic life partner. You are truly wise through your hardships and I'm thankful for you and this podcast!
🙏
Out of the millions of podcast i listen to, this is best yet and the best of yours Lewis Howes. Thank you so much for this one.
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
Thankfully, I have done the internal work since I have always been self directing/self coaching. It's a trait I have had since childhood. I am always wanting to be the best version of myself for Me...which in turn radiates to other people, romantic or not. It all starts from within...a healthy, humble, and solid Self Love. It's a continuous refinement journey. 💖
Since I am not swayed by societal ways and don't lovingly worry about what others think (thanks to my Dad for teaching me this when I was a kid), it makes it so easy to be in my own realm to do my own thing. Simple life principle that is SO easy to execute...treat others, think of others, listen to others, etc. in the same way I want to be treated. Easy peasy when it's not ego based.💖
When all this is an integral part of one's foundation, there is no extra work to bring it to the table when a new relationship of any kind, romantic, friendship, work, etc., is being established. 💖
Very important tidbits. Thank you Lewis for reiterating what is a popular topic these days. 💖
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Thank you, Lewis. I so appreciate you. I can feel your warmth, wisdom, and heart. This was very helpful and clear. Thank you for teaching men and women the importance of healthy relationships and how to come out of their egos into their hearts (although a healthy ego is needed and comes from healing the wounded ego and moving into self-love). There is a difference in your podcasts because of who you are. It is clear that you have done the work you speak of in this video. I have so much compassion for myself and others because we all are trying to heal something.
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Abandonment big time!!
It's not about me pleasing my partner, it's about him not accepting me as I am. HUGE issues in this form and this one relationship brought it out in me more than others have. I've learned a lot about attachment styles...still a work in progress. Very challenging journey.
Some really good, true advice there, alot of what you said actually hit home, something that i never thought about till now & never thought was or could be a problem, but it truly does all make sense!
Great episode! You really spoke from the heart. Great job Lewis!
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Thank you so much for this! I have a lot of work I get to do. I'm starting over this year at 55, and I needed this reminder to be who I am...love.
You're welcome! Thanks for watching 🧡
❤❤❤❤❤beautiful episode❤️❤️❤️love is the ultimate experience❤️❤️❤️ Thank you!!!❤️❤️❤️
This was your very best Pod cast you have done ❤❤❤❤
Thank you 🙏
Dear Lewis
I have watched an followed you and your beautiful being and way of working, from your true inside out, for years now.
By having Worked on myself, for the same ammount of years, as you mention, up until my 38 years now - I feel ready truly. . .
for the first time in my life,
After connecting with me-the pure love on the beautiful inside ❤
. . . To live and share the Love on the outside to ❤
Once again
Thank you, for all the lovely videos you create
AND not the least - Thanks to your woman, for making even more growth, be possible, in you, because she is willing aswell, to walk the talk❤
Thanks for the sharring and for this mirror, the world can choose to spoil it selvf with.
Now i truly hope you can actually read my message, in english, eventhough, Danish is my motherlanguage😊🎉
Thank you Lewis
Maria 🌞🌳
This is incredible and valuable content, thank you ❤ I have been following for years and I think this was my favorite one. You poured the love and wisdom, we feel it! I would love for you to do another video asking all those courageous questions to ask at the beginning of a potential relationship 😊 Please!
Thank you Lewis! Great video! Appreciate the wise words
You are so worthy Lewis I love how you mention your Fiancé Martha she’s is so smart and beautiful you guys are the perfect couple, Los Amo a los dos ❤
Thank you Lewis, I appreciate you and your work....thank you for sharing your wisdom
yeah, I was dating a guy who told me straight to my face he doesn't want to ever grow or communicate or be open or even be loved because that's out of his comfort zone and he does not want to let anyone into his life. that was the end of the dating. I honestly wish him all the best, but I doubt he'll ever experience true love with that attitude. the saddest thing about it? the guy was a certified soft skills trainer, including teaching people about emotional intelligence...
Wow Lewis!!!! You have put the work in !!! I'm so happy for you!!!! Now you're a Great teacher!!!!! Amazing!!!! Keep your head up!!!! Wonderful information!!! Sooooo inspired!!!
Thank you so much for your kind words 🧡
Abandonment is mine because I had little attachment and connection as a young child. Greetings from Scotland!
I am excited to be the love of my life first before I attract the love of my life. ♥️🙏 thank you thank you 🙏
You're welcome! Thanks for watching.
@@lewishowes I really appreciate what you do.
Thank you!
Thank you Lewis for this inspirational video! I really wish education like this about self love and relationships becomes part of school curriculum. I believe relating to others is the most crucial skill everyone needs. 💫
You're welcome! Thanks for watching.
Thanks, this is a really great episode. And I love the shirt- it looks really good on you.
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
🙏❤️ Happy Valentine's Day Soul Tribe Soul Family 🙏❤️
Oh definitely abandonment because I was abandoning myself💯 Love this shift in your content today🔥
Thank you 🙌
What a perfect day to hear this, on Valentine’s Day! So excited for my future and to love BIG! Love your story as well! Here’s to love! ❤
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you said everything!!! Waw thank you for sharing this beautiful message! this is a 💎nugget!
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
Im in love with this eposide, I felt amazing listening to this episode , thanks a lot for sharing
LewisHowes👍🎉🥰
You're welcome, thank you for tuning in 🧡
To improve communication, try active listening by giving your full attention and showing genuine interest in what your partner is saying. Avoid interrupting and really try to understand their perspective. It's also helpful to be clear and direct in your own communication, expressing your thoughts and feelings openly. And don't forget to be patient and understanding with each other. Communication is a skill that can always be improved with practice! Well, when it comes to lasting love, it's important to have open and honest communication with your partner. This means expressing your feelings, listening to each other, and working through any challenges together. Trust is also crucial, as it forms the foundation of a strong relationship. And of course, don't forget to make each other feel loved and appreciated every day! 😊
Also if you can manage 3/4 times a night instead of 0nce a week helps a lot