The older man asking for help in the store reminded me of an experience my 25 yr old son had at a grocery store. He didn’t work there and was doing his own shopping. He’s moderately tall. This older lady (like 80 or something) came up to him and asked if he would get something down off a high shelf for her. Which he did of course. She mentioned that she has trouble getting her shopping sometimes and thanked him for his help. So he suggested that as they were going the same way, maybe they could shop together in case she needed more help. The lady was just tickled pink and they had a lovely time shopping together. Simple acts of kindness can go a long way in making someone’s day a little easier. The irony is that my son is antisocial due to anxiety and autism, so finds it every hard to interact with strangers.
I learn awhile back from my sister who was a born teacher for special students and told me that I am autism and would of be label that if I was born later in the 1900's. I had trouble and still do but not as bad to communicate and talk to people but I learn slowly how to do it and for those people who sincerely need my help and are nice, it seem easy for me and I take down the barrier.
The last story proves that you don't have to be in ideal physical condition to be the hero someone needs to bring a little light into their day. OP was definitely that man's hero for that time. And OP is right. The world can definitely use more compassion and kindness. Awesome story to end the episode on.
I'm a guy who is 68. I could easily see myself being the old man in that last story, in about 10 years. While I'm ok right now, I do see my brain fading. If future me happened to meet the guy in the wheelchair, I know that I would be forever grateful.
The whole story sounded like OP was self-aggrandizing I'm a wonderful person and I want everyone to know it. Was it even a true story or did she write it to be published here? Like Abraham Lincoln said "Don't believe everything you read on the internet"
I was once told that helping people for no reason (like in the last story) is selfish because I’m just trying to look better to others… I am no longer friends with that loser.
If you help people just to brag about it it's selfish. I like to share stories of how I help because it can inspire others to help. Yes it does feel good to be recognized for it, but it feels better to know someone is better off because I did something for them.
@@Listrynne precisely. When I share such stories It's not talking about what a good person I am. I like to say the littlest things can make someone's day just a bit better, you never know how much your kindness means to others, really.
That's a common topic of discussion in the realm of ethics, but just like anything else in ethics, what don't philosophers debate on? The idea isn't that the act in itself is selfish, but has some "self-serving" driving factors, which doesn't have to be the more obviously selfish sake of bragging and boasting to others, but the more self contained pleasant feeling that you did a good deed. And that feeling you get of doing something good is a driving factor to get you to do the good deeds. As Listrynne said "it feels better to know someone is better off because I did something for them." and you also expressed a positive feeling towards doing things not for boasting but for the kindness of others. Getting that good feeling is what is considered "selfish" in ethics but it is misleading because it is not quite the negative connotation we give to the word "selfish" but just that there is an element of it that anything we do isn't supposedly 100% selfless. It's not about greedy personal gain, but the driving factors of decision making, which is a preferable option over the former anyways. After all, one wouldn't decide to do something for the goal of getting bad feelings. But I digress, much of this is just overanalytical philosophy junk.
@@keylimepie3143 Yeah that all is definitely not what they meant when they told me i was being selfish. That sort of philosophy is just a way of looking at the world, this was definitely an accusation because she projected what she'd be doing nice things for on to my motivations. Since she'd be selfish in the praise and attention seeking way, I must be too.
I think on whether a person is being "selfish" in helping others very much depends on their true motivation. If it is less about helping the other person in reality, but more to feed our own sense of being helpful so we can feel good about ourselves, then our motives are selfish. That doesn't mean that anybody who wants to and basically enjoys helping people is doing it for selfish reasons. I once read a story in which the characters were discussing another supposedly fictional story about this issue. A girl continuously is so naively generously helpful to others that she ends up being taken advantage of until death. She never sets reasonable limits, nor asks if the person she helping needs what she has more than she does. She selflessly sacrifices of herself until death. Is this admirable? Foolish? Good? The story I read on both levels would have it that it was a good thing but I disagreed. While wanting to help others is nice and good, not paying any attention to how you are in fact helping them or if they need the help you are giving them, makes it an act about yourself not about the person you are supposedly trying to help. And obviously anyone who goes beyond reasonable limits where they are helping others who need it less than themselves (in cases where it is personally known to them), it is more about feeding that need to be helpful so you can pat yourself on your back. So we can as generally decent people be helpful to others when we see the need, and enjoy making someone else's day a bit better along with the knowledge we have positively impacted someone else (just as if we might feel good if someone was unexpected helpful or nice to us). However a person might want to be helpful more from that desire to be a "helpful person", and then it is less about to what degree they actually were helpful, as long as they think they are and can claim to have been. Hence the selfish aspect of the issue. They are not helping others for the sake of other people but for their own sense of merit. As an example of the latter, think of how often someone who is a complete stranger, not an employee of any sort, unasked comes up and tries to help you in a situation where you weren't looking for or needing help. In fact presumed very wrongly what, if any, problem there was. And while you thank them politely for this unlooked for assistance, you explain that you don't need help or that you don't have a problem. How often is the response a slightly offended "I was only trying to help"? Instead of an apology for misreading the situation in some form. The problem isn't that a person might have made a mistake in thinking you needed help, but in being offended that you didn't want or need that help- that you didn't welcome their offer and was duly grateful.
The story about the man with dementia gave me flashbacks to my grandmother. She had dementia and I was her caregiver. In the span of just a few years she went from my loving grandma to a woman that tried to assault me, called me names, threatened my life and my dog's life, and throw tantrums like a toddler on a daily basis. Dementia is a tough and scary thing to deal with for the person suffering from it and the people who care for them.
I lived with & cared for my mom the last 8 years of her life. I was lucky, though, that she didn't get aggressive as her dementia progressed. Instead, she just shut down. She didn't acknowledge or seem to know anyone in the last 2 months. It was difficult & very sad, but at least I have a lot of good memories with her.
I also worked in nursing homes with old people, sick people, dementia people. The nicest thing they liked about me was that I would bring articles and short books and read aloud to them. I have a good, strong, clear voice and it was no problem for me. I met some of the best people ever in these places. And, I even work with some in their own homes when I worked for Hospice. I have very good memories of these times.
Melissa Whitman, the sad irony is that there are people out there who deny that people who have dementia are violent, or that those who are are in the minority. Und while it's true that there are plenty of mental health illnesses that do not cause the patient to become violent but at the same time there are also plenty of mental health illnesses that do cause the patient to become violent. In even if it is rare that a patient will become violent, there is still that possibility. Und for them to dismiss it because it is a "rarity" is to diminish what the victim(s).
I worked around old people for a while, dementia is pretty much the same as dying. Once it gets bad enough, they aren't even the person they used to be, it's like they already died, but their body keeps on living like normal. It's pretty sad.
last story, holy fuck was that wholesome AF. it's not often an I Don't Work Here story is the result of somebody who isn't rude about it but needs help, but when they do... they're treasures that deserve being archived. as OP said, it's basic human decency, and this subreddit is proof of the idea of "You get what you give."
Exactly man I go out of my way to help people if I can because it's the manners my father instilled in me. Basic decency and good will makes this world a better place
i have in the past help an old man who's motorised wheel chair died on a hill and helped him get home the chair weighs about 450 pounds and the hill is a 60 degree incline there are other ways you could get to the same location but take longer. glad someone else helps the old when they truely need it.
The last story is almost enough to make me think that there actually might be some hope for humanity left. Stories like that IRL used to be the rule, not the rare exception. I hope you find and publish more like this one. In these strange times, we could use them.
Honestly was enough to make me feel a little choked up because it's such a rarity anymore. Helping others, common decency, mutual respect true values have become such a rarity. I assisted an elderly woman who was almost brought to tears because I was the third person she had tried to ask for help, and the only one that did something. It is a sad state to see manners, politeness and the Golden rule have become nearly extinct. I hope to see more stories of human decency to show some hope for humanity
I always tried to help anyone I could, anyway I could, if I could. Many took advantage. . But if I truly helped someone along the way that's all that matters.
@@spiritbx1337 hes in a wheelchair. And at the end, he "drove off" Could be a wheelchair/disabled accessible car but disabled people I know of dont drive by themselves
@@reedman0780 Of course they drive! Pay a little attention next time you see a vehicle parked in a spot reserved for disabled people. Most don’t have personal drivers! For example, if you are paraplegic wheelchair user, you have lost the use of your legs and lower body. But there is nothing stopping you from using your upper body, arms and hands normally, so with a car equipped with a hand throttle and brake, you will easily drive that vehicle just as well and safely as any fully able-bodied person.
Unfortunately the most tragic thing about dementia is that it can’t be “helped”, it only gets worse. I had a Grandmother with Dementia and I watched her go from a little bit forgetful to basically not being able to do anything for herself. She couldn’t even speak, it was very upsetting to watch.
Yeah my grand grand father had that aswell. He didn't know what he was doing. I remember he lived with my aunt and uncle and that only my uncle could handle him because he actually got really aggressive and attacked them sometimes. He wasn't a bad guy as I remember, but that just destroyed his brain.
Actually, there have been some significant medical research progress on the field with some experimental meds that was going into primary stage human testing in december after animal testing showed early stage Alzheimers coating of the nerve endings could be slowed, often arrested and potentially even reversed in some cases. As my paternal grandfather died from it and my dad is in the middle of it, I really hope this research will be the blade that cuts this particular gordian knot before I too become a burden on my own loved ones.
There’s no history of dementia on either side of parents’ families but both my parents are ex drug addicts so I’m afraid that their heavy use of drugs in their teens and early twenties might have some negative effect on their brains as they get older. I really hope it doesn’t.
Well sometimes I've bought stuff from the dollar store and the quality of it will be absolute garbage so much so that it gets me thinking this thing is pretty low quality even by dollar store standards what was this thing even doing there anyway never really complained about it though because I know that doing so would get me nowhere and would just be a big waste of time
That last story had me blubbering like a baby. Having lost my sister, stepfather, and a cousin to Alzheimer's (and about to lose another cousin) and knowing how frightened, scared, and helpless they could be in strange surroundings, I could so identify with this old man. This story was a refreshing change. Please post more like this.
I work with dementia Paitients and they can get pretty scary when sundowning. Knowing their moods can help the situation greatly. So glad the son is getting his father help.
That last story had me in tears. It reminds of a short bit simple story of my own. I work at the red bullseye store. Walking to work one day and crossing a busy street I noticed some guy in a wheelchair having a hard time getting on the sidewalk. Not thinking I just started pushing him to the sidewalk so he can go on his way. He gently thanked me and that was that. When I clocked in to work another coworker saw what I did and said it was a very kind and sweet thing to do.
My grandpa did not have dementia, but kinda same symptomps due an attack in the brain. We where VERY close. And i sat in front of him in the home, and in a moment where the thing took over for a bit. He stared into my eyes, leaned forward and said to me : I want to hurt you. And immidiatly after that his face was in shock and horror and clearly ashamed of what just happened. Ive been working with people with dementia since i was 13/14 ish' so i knew and i told him it was okay and hugged him. Yeah Dementia can cause you to lose all reason and sense of reality and make you quite agressive etc.... And they don't really know what they are doing, it's very sad.
I work retail. 2 things are constant; customers can’t read or listen. I once created a customer with “hi I’m a hippopotamus” and got the response “good thanx”
Story 2: You really cant predict how a sufferer of dementia will react to a situation, I have a family friend whose uncle nearly killed his own son because he thought that his son was a home intruder. They dont have a strong connection to reality and that can become a serious problem very quickly.
My great grandmother had dementia. She went from being the sweetest old lady you could imagine, to a demon who could outcuss a sailor, and she knew more ways to use a walking stick than Jackie Chan. One of my cousins still bears the scar from not moving quick enough.
Oh my lord. Sorry to laugh about grandma winging the cane like Jackie Chan. I'm am envisioning her with a set of num chuks (spelling?). Ha-ha! Go get'em grandma! :0D
My childhood was in a small lane and in a small town were people know each other. a short distance on the other side of the lane was a woman who was not friendly and would complain a lot about this or that. we accept her behavior and learn to live with it. as time past and her husband died and her child left her for their own families, she lived by herself but was not very friendly. one day, my dad was taking for a walk one of his dog grandchild down the lane. this woman came running out of her house, said hi to my dad and played and hugged the dog. and thank him for bring so much joy to her life. he left and went home and asked my mother to call her daughter and check up on her mother. dementia brought out the nice side of her but her daughter thank him for they found out that she was not doing to well on her own. Check up on your loved ones frequently, time may seen the same to you but it does past quickly and we all age.
The old man with dementia really hit home. My paternal Grandfather had Alzheimer’s, and I know he would make it difficult for the nurses/caretakers to do their jobs at what we would call at the Old Folks Community. He had been so nice to me on all of the few times I had seen him. He also knew people, he could look at someone and just read the truth right off of them. It was uncanny, but it was cool too, especially if you were in the right. My Dad had dementia and that had been real hard, but there were so many good moments that I wanted to be with him as much as possible. The nurses had explained to me when I had asked them about their patients with dementia or Alzheimer’s and this is what they had explained. If the person had been a sweetheart, they would more than likely be the complete opposite. And if one had been say, a crotchety old man, he may be real nice and sweet. This bit of information had been important to me. My Grandfather who had been stern but kind could become very aggressive and my Dad who could be a right ass treated me with so much love and respect in his last years. Every time I had to say, I’ll see you later, he always and I mean always said, I love you. I had never heard of those words spoken in all of my life, until he had dementia. I had been proud to be the granddaughter and daughter of these two amazing men. I miss them a great deal. Who knows, it might have been why I kept going back to see him as often as I did. The stories I could tell, still have me smiling today. Be well good people and never ever take it to heart of a loved one who retaliates in angry words and has dementia or Alzheimer’s. . They really don’t mean it. Be well good people.
The last story was pretty nice. Usually I at least offer to help older folks when I see them places like grocery stores. Figure it's just the right thing to do to at least offer, some are happy to take the assistance, others thank me for the offer but decline. The most memorable one was this older gentleman in a wheelchair with a Korea Veteran hat on. And he was happy to take the help since he had a hard time getting stuff from the top shelves. So we walked around the store chatting as we went, listening to his stories which were honestly pretty interesting, he had seen and done a lot in his life. When we got to the check out I saw him getting out his food stamps to pay. I just looked at him and said hey, don't worry and jammed my card in the machine before he could respond. While we were waiting for the cab he called he asked why I did that for him? Just told him, you've seen and done so much for a lot of people, figured id do something nice for him. Id never seen a more grateful person in my life. I think he was just happy to have someone to talk to for a bit.
About the Walmart lady- I've actually had a staff member pretend that they were not a staff member. Went to customer service only to find that the person who denied being a staff member was in fact, a staff member and the person I was originally looking for. So yes it does happen. 😮💨
It does happen, but very rarely. You are a luck case to experience that situation. These Karens though, they think everyone in a store that they think is beneath them is somehow plotting against them. Not anyone else, just them in particular. Especially if they person really didn't work there and there was nothing that could say otherwise. If you were running around in the early 90's during some lazy times, you'd get this kind of treatment several times before the early 2000's.
Sometimes they are merchandising representatives that are stocking, doing inventory or display coordinators for specific vendors. They are allowed in certain area's but can't look up or assist on floor merchandise. Bread & chip companies, soda products & greeting cards just to name a few.. However, sometimes they are just jerks..🤷
@@aking3624 Yeah, in this case they definitely worked at the store I was in. They just didn't want to bother with me, then I got brought right back to them immediately.
@@Kiwi_Tea No. I said nothing, just looked at them like, 'why did you even bother lying?'. I don't know if they were simply having a bad day, or just didn't want to deal with people, but I let it be. They had to deal with the fact that I knew they were a liar, and could tell someone at anytime had I wanted to. If the same thing were to happen today, I might say something, but I didn't that day. Figured they were shitting themselves enough. This took place pre-pandemic btw.
Thank you for including that last story. Basic decency seems to be in short supply any more, and this was uplifting, to say the least. I try to live by the old adage, "Practice random acts of kindness and senseless beauty each day". That young man certainly does!
Before dementia took my grandfather from us when he was only in his sixties, he did indeed suffer from episodes of violence that were extremely out of character for him. He would wake up most days totally convinced that it was his promotion ceremony day; he kept demanding the nurses give him his formal uniform to change into because he was so worried he'd be late to having his new rank pinned on, that his commanding officer was waiting, etc -- and on most days a very wonderful nurse who knew him well would say, I'm so sorry Charlie, I forgot to tell you, your CO called and said the ceremony was postponed! And most days, he would just be disappointed, sulk a bit, and go back to bed to rest.... but if a nurse who didn't know him and his delusions well yet was on morning shift, she'd tell him he was being delusional basically, which umm.....I guess anyone with experience with family members with dementia know how that info goes over!! And he'd get extremely angry and occasionally throw a chair at the nurses, haha. During his lucid moments he'd sort of remember it like a fever dream and ask if it was a real memory or not, and we lied to him so he wouldn't feel soooo embarrassed and guilty for being violent. It wasn't him. Dementia is a terrible thing, and I cannot wait until they find a way to stop it. 🙁 I didn't have nearly enough time to get to know my grandpa, and it breaks my heart. I hope wherever he is now, he gets promoted every single day. 💙
My paternal grandpa got violent with the nurses over intimate hygiene to the point that grandma, his wife, had to be called to help him instead every time he needed a bath or shower as he was too proud to let anyone other than his wife get that close as he was born in the single digit years of the early 20th century, a devout lutheran, eldest son farm kid turned high voltage electrical engineer.
@@SonsOfLorgar My maternal great grandmother was born before 1900 and at one point was very ill when my mother was a teenager. She HATED needing help to bathe and dress..... got embarrassed and VERY ANGRY.... It's a generational thing, I believe, where your body was just not seen by anybody but yourself and your spouse
Is Karen that stupid to think dollar stores are competitors with Target or Walmart? But always remember to point out the ultimate weapons that are CCTV Cameras and witnesses if “it” tries to start something
That last story was so wholesome and heartwarming I teared up from pure feels. I'm glad OP's such an awesome person, and I hope that poor old man's day, week, month, and year got better from then on.
Second! My favorite thing to do with Karens is to go, "Sumimasen. Igo ja arimasen deshita." Then I'll wait a few seconds and say "no spreak engrish." On the story with the man with dementia, my father had dementia and he went from being a normal guy to a complete a hole in under a second. That's why people with dementia cannot be left alone. They cannot drive. They cannot live alone. They must be under 24-hour 7-Day a week 365 days a year supervision because they cannot control their actions and they only get worse and worse as time goes on. My father was seeing men in our house. He thought anything that had a red light on it was a bomb that would explode. He thought there were alternately lakes, trains, and planes in our backyard. He saw people coming out of our microwave. So the person in the office supply store was very lucky. My father was down to 112 lb when he died, but he was still very strong and he did try to bite me and he did hit me. So, you got lucky son.
That last story was the best "I don't work here" story that I ever heard. I hope op and his husband really enjoyed the birthday and that the story was shared with a great meal.
The last story reminds me of something from over 20 years ago now, when I was in my very early 20s. My career was in medical administration (front desk, medical charts, scheduling, transcriptions, insurance crap, billing, etc), and I was living in Seattle, working contract and temporary fill-in jobs. One of the places that called me regularly when their receptionist was out, was a place called Community Psychiatric. It was located in an area along the waterfront, close to the shipyards, called Belltown, and our clientele were the homeless and indigent of the area (one of the highest concentrations of any district in the city lived there). At one point, my agent at the service through which I was working told me that they liked me, and asked me first, because I, “treated their clients like people.” I cried. I was horrified. I was behind bullet-proof glass when I was working there. But every single person who came through that door could never be anything but that-a person; a human being. What’s more, they were in /need/ in the worst way possible! I’m crying now just remembering! How can you treat a human being, any human being, in need, like trash?
That last story brought a tear to my eye. That poor old gentleman was so lost and confused because of his dementia. My stepdad suffered from it, so I know first hand how horrible it can be. God bless the man in the wheelchair for going out of his way to be of help and comfort the poor senior. This just proves that there is still good in this world!
I am a nursing assistant. I work exclusively with elders with altered mental states like alzheimers, dementia, bipolar disorder pretty much any altered mental issues. Back in november of 2021, we had gained a new resident that had dementia. Now, when people first come to us, they tend to be riding the drugs from local hospitals that take about 3 days to come down from. Take that with the fact he is now in a very unfamiliar place, everyone he sees is wearing a mask that covers over half our faces, in a room with a man that is laying in a bad that looks to be on deaths door, the confusion of his mental state breaking down and him being a former marine, yeah all this adds up to his fight or flight instincs kicking into over drive. I got stabbed in the thigh with a pocket knife defending the nurse on duty and 2 bed bound residents who don't know english. Life and times of healthcare. I wouldn't trade my job for anything. 🥰💜
I needed that last story, I work in retail and see Karens all the time, as I work in the back of the store testing things as they come in to make sure they work, and some days I just don't want to go in to work knowing I have to deal with them, this makes me smile and ready to go into work, thanks
My personal theory is that Karens accuse everyone of lying because they are, in fact, pathological liars themselves and project it onto those whose doorsteps they darken.
It's their only frame of reference. I used to assume (after my one semester of college Psychology ;-P ) that Projection was a coping mechanism where people deflected their own failings onto others to make themselves feel better. I've since come to realize that it's really about someone's inability to understand, or at least inability accept that other people don't act like they do. If you're a compulsive Liar or con-artist, you assume that your anti-social behavior is normal (or at least not uncommon) so you assume that everyone else does all the same crap that you do. I hate to get political here, but I think it's within the realm of possibility that a certain politician actually convinced himself that his opponent would cheat at the past election, not because there was a scintilla of evidence but because he himself was willing to cheat in any way possible.. so why wouldn't everyone else?
My personal theory is a form of the Dunning-Krueger effect. Basically, Karen is so convinced that she cannot be wrong, because she's smart and perfect, that everyone else lying is the only logical answer. "I can't be mistaken about this guy working at the store, so he MUST be lying."
Ok, who's been cutting onions in here? Can barely see to type this after the last story. Thank you Fluff for reaffirming my faith in humanity with that very heart warming story!
That last story was beautiful. I wish more people were as kind and compassionate at the OP, and I wish more people in need were as kind, humble, grateful and accepting as the older man. It's great when one good person is able to help another, as it makes BOTH of their days better.
Story 3: Well that was scary. Don't even know how someone can get THAT hostile. Edit: Well, the story answered my question. Now I'm wondering how many people that have been causing a LOT of trouble are because of dementia.
P TSD from having issues due to being in the military or any type of Tramatic situation cause people to get this hostile and there are other mental health issues.
It's another reason why you should always press charges. I cant speak for the US, but in Canada, if someone ended up arrested for this kind of behaviour, they'd get a psych assessment and that might very well be the way they get diagnosed and get the help they need.
It's quite common with dementia patients that they have violent outbursts, I saw it first hand with my grandfather who used to never hurt a fly, then was suddenly attacking nurses
@@wfcoaker1398 Canada is light years ahead of the US in that department. In my happy imaginary world, that's exactly how it would work here too. Especially the "get the help they need" part. They're more likely to end up homeless or rotting in prison.
My mother recently passed from a brain tumor. I took care of her while she was on at home hospice, and my sister works in eldercare facilities. Dementia is no joke, and nearly everyone who suffers from it gets belligerent, especially when it starts getting bad.
That last story is a beautiful counterpoint to all the funny, shocking or exciting ones. How lovely, and its so positive to hear that people still have this reaction to seeing another's distress! :-D
I totally enjoyed the story about the old man and the person in the wheelchair. Stories like that really do make my day. So much negativity in the world, it is really great to hear a wholesome story
Me (loudly): No, I’m not crying! I just got something in my eye! Also me: But that story was so beautiful and has restored my faith in humanity, so I’ll actually be able to finish my day. Thank you, Fluff!! 💜
The last story I was so prepared for it to get flipped on its head but luckily OP had a good heart and open eyes to see he really needed help. So so wholesome...
Fluff keeps coming with these wholesome stories man, but those cutting-onions ninjas keep appearing in the middle of it. Thank you for such magnificent story Fluff, you brought joy to my day.
The last story literally made me cry. I'm so grateful that you put that one in. It reaffirms my faith in humanity. Thank you, Fluff, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.
The last story broke my heart and warmed it at the same time. I also worked in a nursing home in my late teens and it almost wrecked me. I loved all the people who were patient's but I was so sad their family's never were there to visit... IDK it just broke my heart and i actually almost didn't go to nursing school because of it. I thank the OP for sharing this story.
Your sympathy was admirable, but remember, you didn't know the whole story. You didn't know if those people people had been monsters to their families and had earned their isolation.
That last story, told by a master storyteller! ❤I say this because of keeping who was following him without explaining it was the employees. What's more, it was so sweet that I had to take extra insulin! (I'll be here all week, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitstaff.) It's always nice when one of these "I Don't Work Here" tales gets a positive turnaround.
That poor old man, so helpless yet so sweet, showing a disabled gay man such acceptance & gratitude, & the affirmation of the employees at the end, kindness begets kindness. Sooo wholesome & inspiring!
My Grandmother had Alzheimer's Dementia onset when she was about 89/90 years old. I was already an adult at the time and my Father asked me to watch her when he couldn't. We agreed and every so often I would notice things missing around the house that I couldn't find, we were all very worried because it was a lot of knives, forks, and letter openers. I still remember how I grieved before she died because she forgot my name first, but things kept getting worse and worse- I just couldn't see her anymore. My Father stopped having me or him go when she attacked both of us with stockpiled knives. It's never good to hear but people with these conditions can be dangerous and I'm just glad OP was okay and the Son was willing to come back and talk about what happened. I genuinely feel for everyone involved, this are circumstances are never easy.
Well at last the third story was cleared up because honestly that’s hair raising an old man that’s a veteran wants to kill you isn’t exactly a joke and just walk away from
That story was totally fake. I find it very unlikely he would threaten to kill someone in a store, in front of Camera's, over something stupid like that. Even less believable is the manager threatening to throw him through the door instead if just calling the cops right away.
One thing I've found (from having friends in retail) is that even if someone is wearing the store "uniform" it doesn't mean they are on the clock. They are technically not allowed to help customers if they are off the clock (although, if I ask my friends that work there "Hey, do you know where x is?" they will generally tell me. I generally ask "are you on the clock?" and if they say "No" I leave hem alone. Yeah, I don't get the whole "You're lying about working here" thing. Even if they said "I work here but I'm off the clock" that should be enough to move along. Man, I'm so glad the manager stood up for the customer like that and guarded him afterward. Good for him! In some ways I'm relieved that it sounds like it was from Dementia and not just the guy being an asshole. I loved the last story. That was very sweet. I hope the old man is doing OK now.
remember looking after this sweet, fragile little old lady. the family was adamant that no, staff must be mistaken, she would never yell or swear... until the evening they brought her back from a christmas outing. she was barely in the door when she let rip. the family was mortified.
That story about the guy in the copy shop is damn scary, but I love the last story. Not all of these "I don't work here" stories have to involve some idiot or maniac. Sometimes it's just about helping someone. And that's always worth telling.
Loved that last story. If I see someone struggling to get something at a store I usually ask if they need help. Knock on wood I haven't been mistaken for an employee yet. 😂
As an adult woman of 4' 10" I will often ask a complete random stranger if they would mind being tall for me and getting an item from a high shelf 😉😉😊 I always get the assistance I need as well as a little chuckle!!
Story 3: Dementia is a scary thing...and YES it can result in all the symptoms DF described. The sad thing is if you want to know what a dementia patient acts like...just look at the Karen videos...Karens act exactly like a lot of the dementia symptoms. Story 4: This kind of person that we all should aspire to be like...thank you OP for sharing a part of your life with the rest of us :)
Dementia is such a scary thing to deal with for the children of aging parents. My grandmother (My adoptive mother/biological grandmother's mother) was losing her memory and was barely able to recognize any family members younger than my mother and her siblings by the end. My mother (73 this year) is thankfully still mentally and physically capable, including shrewd and calculated financial decision making and preparation for the future. As a man on the autism spectrum and without a lot of life skills and capabilities (I don't think I could ever get or hold down a proper job due to my anxiety issues, compounded by the pandemic and the overall rude and mean lean a lot of people have taken in the world of late), I'll end up relying on my adoptive sister (Biological mother) and adoptive brother (Biological uncle) and even my cousins (Biological uncle's kids) to get through life after mom is gone or starts showing signs of dementia or other mental decay. I feel like losing my mom to dementia or alzheimers or other mental decay will be more traumatic than just her passing away. Her body would be alive the whole time, but it'd hurt to see her lose herself, lose her memories of who I am, who my cousins are, who my cousins' children are, etc. to such a disease.
I did/do years as voluntary work with light and heavy dementia, and ive lost count of agressive and heartbreaking stuff i saw. But they don't know they are agressive in the moment, it's like a switch in the brain.
That last story, let me tell you. I just turned 40 and grew up in the manly men and real men don't have or ever show emotion mind set. Stories like the one with the man in the wheel chair helping the old man had me feeling like I was chopping onions and didn't hold my breath. That kind of treatment and forgotten mentality is what briefly restores my faith in humanity sometimes. Thank you Fluff, your channel is one of my absolute favorites.
Okay the last story made me cry a little bit of sad tears and a little bit of happy tears. It's sad that showing such kindness is a very rare thing nowadays. I really wish a lot more people had the same caring heart as OP. Love your videos Peace and love to you and your family 💙💚💙💚💙
that last story made me cry Why the hell isn't there more of that these days. How hard is it to be kind and decent to someone, regardless of who they are?
That last one was so nice. It's a similar attitude my parents drove into me, just be kind where you can and hold a little empathy in your heart. I've never helped as much s this story though, just reaching high stuff or running interference with creeps for girls who look worried about them . This is a story that makes my heart grow three sizes. I hoped people would be like this with my grandma when she was on her way out.
Oh darkFluff, dementia sucks! My mom, a 4'11" soft spoken and polite woman became a combative and almost violent sailor. She made up some good swear phrases towards the end. The woman's worst swear was sh1t beforehand. My dad's mom had it worse, she forgot who everyone, including her husband and sister was. Gram was very healthy so this went on for years. Poor gramps and her sons. At least my mom remembered all of us. It was difficult to go through it all but I'd deal just for a day or conversation with mom again. Great videos Fluff!
On the dementia story, we had a friend that developed dementia. She had been one of the nicest people I knew but the dementia totally destroyed her personality. She became verbally abusive and physically violent. A friend who rented a room from her had to move out because she physically attacked her. It was so sad but dementia can really destroy a person.
the last story had me in tears op may not wear a cape but but he's a true hero I hope he has the best life imaginable and for the old man I hope he rests well at night knowing that no matter what situation people are in there will always be a helping hand near by
Story 4: I absolutely love OP went out of their way to help the elderly man get the things he needed and let man push their wheelchair so he could have some support. Kindness goes a long way. Wholesome. :)
That last story was BEAUTIFUL! I bet you could get some dedicated traffic to wholesome only story videos as well. It’s like the book line “Chicken Soup for the Soul”
Dementia sucks. My dad was the sweetest man; almost always pleasant and gracious. Suddenly he was an angry man who hated everybody and every thing. He refused any assistance, fought taking his meds and just yelled at everybody for no reason. Then my husband was diagnosed with dementia. Yep. Total opposite personality. It’s not easy to deal with and hurts even when you know they can’t help it.
The story of the man with dementia who assaulted the customer trying to help struck home with me. The men in my family develop fast onset dementia around 70. I watched my grandpa go from a sweet caring man to unpredictable and angry when I was 12. My father and my uncle, who were his sons and a year apart in age, both suffered the onset at 72. My uncle was a concert pianist and could no longer perform. He would call me crying often because he lost the one thing that was his passion and deteriorated over the course of a year. He passed away from systemic organ failure. My father started several months later and could not be left alone. He was very much like the man in the story. One day he got in his car, took off before we could stop him and found him driving around in a parking lot not crying because he did not know where he was or how he got there. He declined rapidly and then died of systemic organ failure too.
![r/IDontWorkHereLady - Snobby Karen Attacks Me for NOT Being an Employee! [It Gets WORSE]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/SID8bYB5Xhg/mqdefault.jpg)
The older man asking for help in the store reminded me of an experience my 25 yr old son had at a grocery store. He didn’t work there and was doing his own shopping. He’s moderately tall. This older lady (like 80 or something) came up to him and asked if he would get something down off a high shelf for her. Which he did of course. She mentioned that she has trouble getting her shopping sometimes and thanked him for his help. So he suggested that as they were going the same way, maybe they could shop together in case she needed more help. The lady was just tickled pink and they had a lovely time shopping together. Simple acts of kindness can go a long way in making someone’s day a little easier. The irony is that my son is antisocial due to anxiety and autism, so finds it every hard to interact with strangers.
I learn awhile back from my sister who was a born teacher for special students and told me that I am autism and would of be label that if I was born later in the 1900's. I had trouble and still do but not as bad to communicate and talk to people but I learn slowly how to do it and for those people who sincerely need my help and are nice, it seem easy for me and I take down the barrier.
Kindness and gentleness definitely matter.
Doesn’t it make your heart good to have raised such a kind man? ❤️
"Helping a person out by giving them kindness is never an imposition on me". What a beautiful attitude to carry, that is awesome!
The last story proves that you don't have to be in ideal physical condition to be the hero someone needs to bring a little light into their day. OP was definitely that man's hero for that time. And OP is right. The world can definitely use more compassion and kindness. Awesome story to end the episode on.
I'm a guy who is 68. I could easily see myself being the old man in that last story, in about 10 years. While I'm ok right now, I do see my brain fading. If future me happened to meet the guy in the wheelchair, I know that I would be forever grateful.
Couldn't agree more... 👍
Kindness goes a long way....
Very touching story ♥ I love a reminder to show kindness
The whole story sounded like OP was self-aggrandizing I'm a wonderful person and I want everyone to know it. Was it even a true story or did she write it to be published here? Like Abraham Lincoln said "Don't believe everything you read on the internet"
I was once told that helping people for no reason (like in the last story) is selfish because I’m just trying to look better to others… I am no longer friends with that loser.
If you help people just to brag about it it's selfish. I like to share stories of how I help because it can inspire others to help. Yes it does feel good to be recognized for it, but it feels better to know someone is better off because I did something for them.
@@Listrynne precisely. When I share such stories It's not talking about what a good person I am. I like to say the littlest things can make someone's day just a bit better, you never know how much your kindness means to others, really.
That's a common topic of discussion in the realm of ethics, but just like anything else in ethics, what don't philosophers debate on?
The idea isn't that the act in itself is selfish, but has some "self-serving" driving factors, which doesn't have to be the more obviously selfish sake of bragging and boasting to others, but the more self contained pleasant feeling that you did a good deed. And that feeling you get of doing something good is a driving factor to get you to do the good deeds. As Listrynne said "it feels better to know someone is better off because I did something for them." and you also expressed a positive feeling towards doing things not for boasting but for the kindness of others. Getting that good feeling is what is considered "selfish" in ethics but it is misleading because it is not quite the negative connotation we give to the word "selfish" but just that there is an element of it that anything we do isn't supposedly 100% selfless. It's not about greedy personal gain, but the driving factors of decision making, which is a preferable option over the former anyways. After all, one wouldn't decide to do something for the goal of getting bad feelings. But I digress, much of this is just overanalytical philosophy junk.
@@keylimepie3143 Yeah that all is definitely not what they meant when they told me i was being selfish. That sort of philosophy is just a way of looking at the world, this was definitely an accusation because she projected what she'd be doing nice things for on to my motivations. Since she'd be selfish in the praise and attention seeking way, I must be too.
I think on whether a person is being "selfish" in helping others very much depends on their true motivation. If it is less about helping the other person in reality, but more to feed our own sense of being helpful so we can feel good about ourselves, then our motives are selfish. That doesn't mean that anybody who wants to and basically enjoys helping people is doing it for selfish reasons.
I once read a story in which the characters were discussing another supposedly fictional story about this issue. A girl continuously is so naively generously helpful to others that she ends up being taken advantage of until death. She never sets reasonable limits, nor asks if the person she helping needs what she has more than she does. She selflessly sacrifices of herself until death. Is this admirable? Foolish? Good? The story I read on both levels would have it that it was a good thing but I disagreed.
While wanting to help others is nice and good, not paying any attention to how you are in fact helping them or if they need the help you are giving them, makes it an act about yourself not about the person you are supposedly trying to help. And obviously anyone who goes beyond reasonable limits where they are helping others who need it less than themselves (in cases where it is personally known to them), it is more about feeding that need to be helpful so you can pat yourself on your back.
So we can as generally decent people be helpful to others when we see the need, and enjoy making someone else's day a bit better along with the knowledge we have positively impacted someone else (just as if we might feel good if someone was unexpected helpful or nice to us). However a person might want to be helpful more from that desire to be a "helpful person", and then it is less about to what degree they actually were helpful, as long as they think they are and can claim to have been. Hence the selfish aspect of the issue. They are not helping others for the sake of other people but for their own sense of merit.
As an example of the latter, think of how often someone who is a complete stranger, not an employee of any sort, unasked comes up and tries to help you in a situation where you weren't looking for or needing help. In fact presumed very wrongly what, if any, problem there was. And while you thank them politely for this unlooked for assistance, you explain that you don't need help or that you don't have a problem. How often is the response a slightly offended "I was only trying to help"? Instead of an apology for misreading the situation in some form. The problem isn't that a person might have made a mistake in thinking you needed help, but in being offended that you didn't want or need that help- that you didn't welcome their offer and was duly grateful.
The story about the man with dementia gave me flashbacks to my grandmother. She had dementia and I was her caregiver. In the span of just a few years she went from my loving grandma to a woman that tried to assault me, called me names, threatened my life and my dog's life, and throw tantrums like a toddler on a daily basis. Dementia is a tough and scary thing to deal with for the person suffering from it and the people who care for them.
I lived with & cared for my mom the last 8 years of her life. I was lucky, though, that she didn't get aggressive as her dementia progressed. Instead, she just shut down. She didn't acknowledge or seem to know anyone in the last 2 months. It was difficult & very sad, but at least I have a lot of good memories with her.
I also worked in nursing homes with old people, sick people, dementia people. The nicest thing they liked about me was that I would bring articles and short books and read aloud to them. I have a good, strong, clear voice and it was no problem for me. I met some of the best people ever in these places. And, I even work with some in their own homes when I worked for Hospice. I have very good memories of these times.
Melissa Whitman, the sad irony is that there are people out there who deny that people who have dementia are violent, or that those who are are in the minority. Und while it's true that there are plenty of mental health illnesses that do not cause the patient to become violent but at the same time there are also plenty of mental health illnesses that do cause the patient to become violent. In even if it is rare that a patient will become violent, there is still that possibility. Und for them to dismiss it because it is a "rarity" is to diminish what the victim(s).
@@DigitalCowboy000 The mind can make one a mild manner man or blood thirsty monster.
I worked around old people for a while, dementia is pretty much the same as dying.
Once it gets bad enough, they aren't even the person they used to be, it's like they already died, but their body keeps on living like normal.
It's pretty sad.
last story, holy fuck was that wholesome AF. it's not often an I Don't Work Here story is the result of somebody who isn't rude about it but needs help, but when they do... they're treasures that deserve being archived. as OP said, it's basic human decency, and this subreddit is proof of the idea of "You get what you give."
Exactly man I go out of my way to help people if I can because it's the manners my father instilled in me. Basic decency and good will makes this world a better place
Aye, I agree. If that story is fake like some on the sub are (not saying it is) I don't care I'll just call it a parable about how we should act.
i have in the past help an old man who's motorised wheel chair died on a hill and helped him get home the chair weighs about 450 pounds and the hill is a 60 degree incline there are other ways you could get to the same location but take longer. glad someone else helps the old when they truely need it.
The last story is almost enough to make me think that there actually might be some hope for humanity left. Stories like that IRL used to be the rule, not the rare exception. I hope you find and publish more like this one. In these strange times, we could use them.
Seems almost too good to be true...
Honestly was enough to make me feel a little choked up because it's such a rarity anymore. Helping others, common decency, mutual respect true values have become such a rarity. I assisted an elderly woman who was almost brought to tears because I was the third person she had tried to ask for help, and the only one that did something.
It is a sad state to see manners, politeness and the Golden rule have become nearly extinct. I hope to see more stories of human decency to show some hope for humanity
I always tried to help anyone I could, anyway I could, if I could. Many took advantage. . But if I truly helped someone along the way that's all that matters.
@@spiritbx1337 hes in a wheelchair.
And at the end, he "drove off"
Could be a wheelchair/disabled accessible car but disabled people I know of dont drive by themselves
@@reedman0780 Of course they drive! Pay a little attention next time you see a vehicle parked in a spot reserved for disabled people. Most don’t have personal drivers!
For example, if you are paraplegic wheelchair user, you have lost the use of your legs and lower body. But there is nothing stopping you from using your upper body, arms and hands normally, so with a car equipped with a hand throttle and brake, you will easily drive that vehicle just as well and safely as any fully able-bodied person.
Unfortunately the most tragic thing about dementia is that it can’t be “helped”, it only gets worse. I had a Grandmother with Dementia and I watched her go from a little bit forgetful to basically not being able to do anything for herself. She couldn’t even speak, it was very upsetting to watch.
Yeah my grand grand father had that aswell. He didn't know what he was doing. I remember he lived with my aunt and uncle and that only my uncle could handle him because he actually got really aggressive and attacked them sometimes. He wasn't a bad guy as I remember, but that just destroyed his brain.
I'm so sorry you both went through that :(
I work people with dementia, and even after all these years it's sad and heart breaking, especially during this long pandemic.
Actually, there have been some significant medical research progress on the field with some experimental meds that was going into primary stage human testing in december after animal testing showed early stage Alzheimers coating of the nerve endings could be slowed, often arrested and potentially even reversed in some cases.
As my paternal grandfather died from it and my dad is in the middle of it, I really hope this research will be the blade that cuts this particular gordian knot before I too become a burden on my own loved ones.
There’s no history of dementia on either side of parents’ families but both my parents are ex drug addicts so I’m afraid that their heavy use of drugs in their teens and early twenties might have some negative effect on their brains as they get older. I really hope it doesn’t.
Who complains about the quality of goods at a dollar store?😂😂😂
Same people that buy the steak there
KAREN
Well sometimes I've bought stuff from the dollar store and the quality of it will be absolute garbage so much so that it gets me thinking this thing is pretty low quality even by dollar store standards what was this thing even doing there anyway never really complained about it though because I know that doing so would get me nowhere and would just be a big waste of time
You get what you pay for. I don't get why anyone would complain about cheap things being cheaply made XD
“This is the dollar store, how good can it be?”
That last story had me blubbering like a baby. Having lost my sister, stepfather, and a cousin to Alzheimer's (and about to lose another cousin) and knowing how frightened, scared, and helpless they could be in strange surroundings, I could so identify with this old man. This story was a refreshing change. Please post more like this.
I work with dementia Paitients and they can get pretty scary when sundowning. Knowing their moods can help the situation greatly. So glad the son is getting his father help.
That last story had me in tears. It reminds of a short bit simple story of my own. I work at the red bullseye store. Walking to work one day and crossing a busy street I noticed some guy in a wheelchair having a hard time getting on the sidewalk. Not thinking I just started pushing him to the sidewalk so he can go on his way. He gently thanked me and that was that. When I clocked in to work another coworker saw what I did and said it was a very kind and sweet thing to do.
My grandpa did not have dementia, but kinda same symptomps due an attack in the brain. We where VERY close. And i sat in front of him in the home, and in a moment where the thing took over for a bit. He stared into my eyes, leaned forward and said to me : I want to hurt you. And immidiatly after that his face was in shock and horror and clearly ashamed of what just happened. Ive been working with people with dementia since i was 13/14 ish' so i knew and i told him it was okay and hugged him. Yeah Dementia can cause you to lose all reason and sense of reality and make you quite agressive etc.... And they don't really know what they are doing, it's very sad.
I work retail. 2 things are constant; customers can’t read or listen. I once created a customer with “hi I’m a hippopotamus” and got the response “good thanx”
Story 2: You really cant predict how a sufferer of dementia will react to a situation, I have a family friend whose uncle nearly killed his own son because he thought that his son was a home intruder. They dont have a strong connection to reality and that can become a serious problem very quickly.
My great grandmother had dementia. She went from being the sweetest old lady you could imagine, to a demon who could outcuss a sailor, and she knew more ways to use a walking stick than Jackie Chan. One of my cousins still bears the scar from not moving quick enough.
Maybe my grandma needs dimentia.... she's already a demon who could outcuss a sailor and hates children. Maybe it would reverse it?
@@toysruskid5074 Are you a r3t@rd? Your comment makes me think so.
Oh my lord. Sorry to laugh about grandma winging the cane like Jackie Chan. I'm am envisioning her with a set of num chuks (spelling?). Ha-ha! Go get'em grandma! :0D
My childhood was in a small lane and in a small town were people know each other. a short distance on the other side of the lane was a woman who was not friendly and would complain a lot about this or that. we accept her behavior and learn to live with it. as time past and her husband died and her child left her for their own families, she lived by herself but was not very friendly. one day, my dad was taking for a walk one of his dog grandchild down the lane. this woman came running out of her house, said hi to my dad and played and hugged the dog. and thank him for bring so much joy to her life. he left and went home and asked my mother to call her daughter and check up on her mother. dementia brought out the nice side of her but her daughter thank him for they found out that she was not doing to well on her own. Check up on your loved ones frequently, time may seen the same to you but it does past quickly and we all age.
The old man with dementia really hit home. My paternal Grandfather had Alzheimer’s, and I know he would make it difficult for the nurses/caretakers to do their jobs at what we would call at the Old Folks Community. He had been so nice to me on all of the few times I had seen him. He also knew people, he could look at someone and just read the truth right off of them. It was uncanny, but it was cool too, especially if you were in the right.
My Dad had dementia and that had been real hard, but there were so many good moments that I wanted to be with him as much as possible. The nurses had explained to me when I had asked them about their patients with dementia or Alzheimer’s and this is what they had explained. If the person had been a sweetheart, they would more than likely be the complete opposite. And if one had been say, a crotchety old man, he may be real nice and sweet. This bit of information had been important to me. My Grandfather who had been stern but kind could become very aggressive and my Dad who could be a right ass treated me with so much love and respect in his last years. Every time I had to say, I’ll see you later, he always and I mean always said, I love you. I had never heard of those words spoken in all of my life, until he had dementia.
I had been proud to be the granddaughter and daughter of these two amazing men. I miss them a great deal. Who knows, it might have been why I kept going back to see him as often as I did. The stories I could tell, still have me smiling today.
Be well good people and never ever take it to heart of a loved one who retaliates in angry words and has dementia or Alzheimer’s. . They really don’t mean it. Be well good people.
The last story was pretty nice. Usually I at least offer to help older folks when I see them places like grocery stores. Figure it's just the right thing to do to at least offer, some are happy to take the assistance, others thank me for the offer but decline.
The most memorable one was this older gentleman in a wheelchair with a Korea Veteran hat on. And he was happy to take the help since he had a hard time getting stuff from the top shelves. So we walked around the store chatting as we went, listening to his stories which were honestly pretty interesting, he had seen and done a lot in his life. When we got to the check out I saw him getting out his food stamps to pay. I just looked at him and said hey, don't worry and jammed my card in the machine before he could respond. While we were waiting for the cab he called he asked why I did that for him? Just told him, you've seen and done so much for a lot of people, figured id do something nice for him. Id never seen a more grateful person in my life. I think he was just happy to have someone to talk to for a bit.
About the Walmart lady- I've actually had a staff member pretend that they were not a staff member. Went to customer service only to find that the person who denied being a staff member was in fact, a staff member and the person I was originally looking for. So yes it does happen. 😮💨
It does happen, but very rarely. You are a luck case to experience that situation. These Karens though, they think everyone in a store that they think is beneath them is somehow plotting against them. Not anyone else, just them in particular. Especially if they person really didn't work there and there was nothing that could say otherwise. If you were running around in the early 90's during some lazy times, you'd get this kind of treatment several times before the early 2000's.
Sometimes they are merchandising representatives that are stocking, doing inventory or display coordinators for specific vendors. They are allowed in certain area's but can't look up or assist on floor merchandise. Bread & chip companies, soda products & greeting cards just to name a few.. However, sometimes they are just jerks..🤷
@@aking3624 Yeah, in this case they definitely worked at the store I was in. They just didn't want to bother with me, then I got brought right back to them immediately.
How the heck can anyone even jeopardise their job like that? Were they given a disciplinary or fired on the spot?
@@Kiwi_Tea No. I said nothing, just looked at them like, 'why did you even bother lying?'. I don't know if they were simply having a bad day, or just didn't want to deal with people, but I let it be.
They had to deal with the fact that I knew they were a liar, and could tell someone at anytime had I wanted to. If the same thing were to happen today, I might say something, but I didn't that day. Figured they were shitting themselves enough.
This took place pre-pandemic btw.
Thank you for including that last story. Basic decency seems to be in short supply any more, and this was uplifting, to say the least. I try to live by the old adage, "Practice random acts of kindness and senseless beauty each day". That young man certainly does!
Before dementia took my grandfather from us when he was only in his sixties, he did indeed suffer from episodes of violence that were extremely out of character for him. He would wake up most days totally convinced that it was his promotion ceremony day; he kept demanding the nurses give him his formal uniform to change into because he was so worried he'd be late to having his new rank pinned on, that his commanding officer was waiting, etc -- and on most days a very wonderful nurse who knew him well would say, I'm so sorry Charlie, I forgot to tell you, your CO called and said the ceremony was postponed! And most days, he would just be disappointed, sulk a bit, and go back to bed to rest.... but if a nurse who didn't know him and his delusions well yet was on morning shift, she'd tell him he was being delusional basically, which umm.....I guess anyone with experience with family members with dementia know how that info goes over!! And he'd get extremely angry and occasionally throw a chair at the nurses, haha. During his lucid moments he'd sort of remember it like a fever dream and ask if it was a real memory or not, and we lied to him so he wouldn't feel soooo embarrassed and guilty for being violent. It wasn't him. Dementia is a terrible thing, and I cannot wait until they find a way to stop it. 🙁 I didn't have nearly enough time to get to know my grandpa, and it breaks my heart. I hope wherever he is now, he gets promoted every single day. 💙
My paternal grandpa got violent with the nurses over intimate hygiene to the point that grandma, his wife, had to be called to help him instead every time he needed a bath or shower as he was too proud to let anyone other than his wife get that close as he was born in the single digit years of the early 20th century, a devout lutheran, eldest son farm kid turned high voltage electrical engineer.
@@SonsOfLorgar My maternal great grandmother was born before 1900 and at one point was very ill when my mother was a teenager. She HATED needing help to bathe and dress..... got embarrassed and VERY ANGRY.... It's a generational thing, I believe, where your body was just not seen by anybody but yourself and your spouse
OK, that last line, someone is chopping onions.
#4- OP is a pure class act. What a wonderful way to end this episode, with someone acting a caring way, God bless them both.
Is Karen that stupid to think dollar stores are competitors with Target or Walmart? But always remember to point out the ultimate weapons that are CCTV Cameras and witnesses if “it” tries to start something
Walmart's real competition is Amazon.
That last story was so wholesome and heartwarming I teared up from pure feels. I'm glad OP's such an awesome person, and I hope that poor old man's day, week, month, and year got better from then on.
Second! My favorite thing to do with Karens is to go, "Sumimasen. Igo ja arimasen deshita." Then I'll wait a few seconds and say "no spreak engrish."
On the story with the man with dementia, my father had dementia and he went from being a normal guy to a complete a hole in under a second. That's why people with dementia cannot be left alone. They cannot drive. They cannot live alone. They must be under 24-hour 7-Day a week 365 days a year supervision because they cannot control their actions and they only get worse and worse as time goes on. My father was seeing men in our house. He thought anything that had a red light on it was a bomb that would explode. He thought there were alternately lakes, trains, and planes in our backyard. He saw people coming out of our microwave. So the person in the office supply store was very lucky. My father was down to 112 lb when he died, but he was still very strong and he did try to bite me and he did hit me. So, you got lucky son.
Karens think everyone is lying, because they lie all the time to get out of the situations they get themselves in for being a Karen.
That last story was the best "I don't work here" story that I ever heard. I hope op and his husband really enjoyed the birthday and that the story was shared with a great meal.
The last story reminds me of something from over 20 years ago now, when I was in my very early 20s. My career was in medical administration (front desk, medical charts, scheduling, transcriptions, insurance crap, billing, etc), and I was living in Seattle, working contract and temporary fill-in jobs.
One of the places that called me regularly when their receptionist was out, was a place called Community Psychiatric. It was located in an area along the waterfront, close to the shipyards, called Belltown, and our clientele were the homeless and indigent of the area (one of the highest concentrations of any district in the city lived there).
At one point, my agent at the service through which I was working told me that they liked me, and asked me first, because I, “treated their clients like people.” I cried. I was horrified.
I was behind bullet-proof glass when I was working there. But every single person who came through that door could never be anything but that-a person; a human being. What’s more, they were in /need/ in the worst way possible! I’m crying now just remembering!
How can you treat a human being, any human being, in need, like trash?
That last story brought a tear to my eye. That poor old gentleman was so lost and confused because of his dementia. My stepdad suffered from it, so I know first hand how horrible it can be. God bless the man in the wheelchair for going out of his way to be of help and comfort the poor senior. This just proves that there is still good in this world!
I am a nursing assistant. I work exclusively with elders with altered mental states like alzheimers, dementia, bipolar disorder pretty much any altered mental issues. Back in november of 2021, we had gained a new resident that had dementia. Now, when people first come to us, they tend to be riding the drugs from local hospitals that take about 3 days to come down from. Take that with the fact he is now in a very unfamiliar place, everyone he sees is wearing a mask that covers over half our faces, in a room with a man that is laying in a bad that looks to be on deaths door, the confusion of his mental state breaking down and him being a former marine, yeah all this adds up to his fight or flight instincs kicking into over drive. I got stabbed in the thigh with a pocket knife defending the nurse on duty and 2 bed bound residents who don't know english. Life and times of healthcare. I wouldn't trade my job for anything. 🥰💜
I needed that last story, I work in retail and see Karens all the time, as I work in the back of the store testing things as they come in to make sure they work, and some days I just don't want to go in to work knowing I have to deal with them, this makes me smile and ready to go into work, thanks
That last story didn't only make my day, It genuinely made me cry. I love kind-hearted people
My heart goes out to the son for telling the manager about his dad. I truly hope his father gets the help he heeds.
My personal theory is that Karens accuse everyone of lying because they are, in fact, pathological liars themselves and project it onto those whose doorsteps they darken.
That is a possibility.
I agree, I've noticed they accuse others if what they themselves are guilty of!
I think that is why they are so angry! They see themselves!
It's their only frame of reference.
I used to assume (after my one semester of college Psychology ;-P ) that Projection was a coping mechanism where people deflected their own failings onto others to make themselves feel better.
I've since come to realize that it's really about someone's inability to understand, or at least inability accept that other people don't act like they do.
If you're a compulsive Liar or con-artist, you assume that your anti-social behavior is normal (or at least not uncommon) so you assume that everyone else does all the same crap that you do.
I hate to get political here, but I think it's within the realm of possibility that a certain politician actually convinced himself that his opponent would cheat at the past election, not because there was a scintilla of evidence but because he himself was willing to cheat in any way possible.. so why wouldn't everyone else?
My personal theory is a form of the Dunning-Krueger effect. Basically, Karen is so convinced that she cannot be wrong, because she's smart and perfect, that everyone else lying is the only logical answer. "I can't be mistaken about this guy working at the store, so he MUST be lying."
@@ffakr
All elections for the past few decades in most countries have had massive electoral fraud committed but this last one was the worst ever.
That last story was the most wholesome story on the internet I've ever heard. We need more people like OP. It nearly made me cry (,:
Ok, who's been cutting onions in here? Can barely see to type this after the last story. Thank you Fluff for reaffirming my faith in humanity with that very heart warming story!
That last story was beautiful. I wish more people were as kind and compassionate at the OP, and I wish more people in need were as kind, humble, grateful and accepting as the older man. It's great when one good person is able to help another, as it makes BOTH of their days better.
Story 3: Well that was scary. Don't even know how someone can get THAT hostile.
Edit: Well, the story answered my question.
Now I'm wondering how many people that have been causing a LOT of trouble are because of dementia.
P TSD from having issues due to being in the military or any type of Tramatic situation cause people to get this hostile and there are other mental health issues.
It's another reason why you should always press charges. I cant speak for the US, but in Canada, if someone ended up arrested for this kind of behaviour, they'd get a psych assessment and that might very well be the way they get diagnosed and get the help they need.
It's quite common with dementia patients that they have violent outbursts, I saw it first hand with my grandfather who used to never hurt a fly, then was suddenly attacking nurses
@@wfcoaker1398 Canada is light years ahead of the US in that department. In my happy imaginary world, that's exactly how it would work here too. Especially the "get the help they need" part. They're more likely to end up homeless or rotting in prison.
Many people are fucking insane. People have been murdered for way less.
That last story was so beautiful. I love knowing that there are some people out there that make the world better by existing.
I may come here for the Karens, but I also love a good wholesome story and that one with the elderly man was one of the best.
Can we please do a wholesome story at the end of each I don’t work her lady video? I’m literally crying from how sweet that guy was. Both of them tbh
My mother recently passed from a brain tumor. I took care of her while she was on at home hospice, and my sister works in eldercare facilities. Dementia is no joke, and nearly everyone who suffers from it gets belligerent, especially when it starts getting bad.
As someone who works in retail hearing that last story brought tears to my eyes! Kindness doesn't cost a thing but it is priceless!!!
That last story is a beautiful counterpoint to all the funny, shocking or exciting ones. How lovely, and its so positive to hear that people still have this reaction to seeing another's distress! :-D
I totally enjoyed the story about the old man and the person in the wheelchair. Stories like that really do make my day. So much negativity in the world, it is really great to hear a wholesome story
Me (loudly): No, I’m not crying! I just got something in my eye!
Also me: But that story was so beautiful and has restored my faith in humanity, so I’ll actually be able to finish my day. Thank you, Fluff!! 💜
Yup, chopping onions here too.
The last story I was so prepared for it to get flipped on its head but luckily OP had a good heart and open eyes to see he really needed help. So so wholesome...
The final story warms my heart, I love that young man's acts of kindness 💓 God bless that angel 😇
That last story 🥺 What kindness. I wanted to hug them both!
Fluff keeps coming with these wholesome stories man, but those cutting-onions ninjas keep appearing in the middle of it.
Thank you for such magnificent story Fluff, you brought joy to my day.
Yes,Fluff- that last story DID make my day! I despair a little less for humanity knowing there are still truly good people out there!
The last story honestly made me tear up. I’m glad there’s still wonderful people out there like OP.
The last story literally made me cry. I'm so grateful that you put that one in. It reaffirms my faith in humanity. Thank you, Fluff, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.
That last story almost made me cry. All I could think about was if that was my grandfather I definitely would want someone to help him
Last story was so heartwarming. Good to know that there are good poeple in thus world
The last story broke my heart and warmed it at the same time. I also worked in a nursing home in my late teens and it almost wrecked me. I loved all the people who were patient's but I was so sad their family's never were there to visit... IDK it just broke my heart and i actually almost didn't go to nursing school because of it. I thank the OP for sharing this story.
Your sympathy was admirable, but remember, you didn't know the whole story. You didn't know if those people people had been monsters to their families and had earned their isolation.
That last story, told by a master storyteller! ❤I say this because of keeping who was following him without explaining it was the employees. What's more, it was so sweet that I had to take extra insulin! (I'll be here all week, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitstaff.) It's always nice when one of these "I Don't Work Here" tales gets a positive turnaround.
It is not often one of these stories brings tears to my eyes, but the last one certainly did. Bless you, OP.
The last story was so AWESOME!!! It's so wonderful to see that there are still good, kind-hearted people in this world.
The last story made my faith in humanity return... To op thank you for being you..such a kind soul..
That poor old man, so helpless yet so sweet, showing a disabled gay man such acceptance & gratitude, & the affirmation of the employees at the end, kindness begets kindness. Sooo wholesome & inspiring!
The last story had me in tears.
Thanks for posting a story about a truly decent human being
I truly LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the last story. I was almost in tears.
That last story is beautiful and brought tears to my eyes.
My Grandmother had Alzheimer's Dementia onset when she was about 89/90 years old. I was already an adult at the time and my Father asked me to watch her when he couldn't. We agreed and every so often I would notice things missing around the house that I couldn't find, we were all very worried because it was a lot of knives, forks, and letter openers. I still remember how I grieved before she died because she forgot my name first, but things kept getting worse and worse- I just couldn't see her anymore. My Father stopped having me or him go when she attacked both of us with stockpiled knives.
It's never good to hear but people with these conditions can be dangerous and I'm just glad OP was okay and the Son was willing to come back and talk about what happened. I genuinely feel for everyone involved, this are circumstances are never easy.
Well at last the third story was cleared up because honestly that’s hair raising an old man that’s a veteran wants to kill you isn’t exactly a joke and just walk away from
My first year of working at my job, I encountered a man with Dementia who called me "Chickenshit" when I didn't respond to a joke he made.
That story was totally fake. I find it very unlikely he would threaten to kill someone in a store, in front of Camera's, over something stupid like that. Even less believable is the manager threatening to throw him through the door instead if just calling the cops right away.
@@EmeraldEyesEsotericYou clearly haven't experienced crazy customers or working in retail then.
@@EmeraldEyesEsoteric
You clearly haven't met someone with dementia.
Wow... that last story is the kinda story we need more often in this world!
One thing I've found (from having friends in retail) is that even if someone is wearing the store "uniform" it doesn't mean they are on the clock. They are technically not allowed to help customers if they are off the clock (although, if I ask my friends that work there "Hey, do you know where x is?" they will generally tell me. I generally ask "are you on the clock?" and if they say "No" I leave hem alone.
Yeah, I don't get the whole "You're lying about working here" thing. Even if they said "I work here but I'm off the clock" that should be enough to move along.
Man, I'm so glad the manager stood up for the customer like that and guarded him afterward. Good for him! In some ways I'm relieved that it sounds like it was from Dementia and not just the guy being an asshole.
I loved the last story. That was very sweet. I hope the old man is doing OK now.
That final story made me cry. My heart genuinely ached from overjoyment. Thank you for sharing it with us.
remember looking after this sweet, fragile little old lady. the family was adamant that no, staff must be mistaken, she would never yell or swear... until the evening they brought her back from a christmas outing. she was barely in the door when she let rip. the family was mortified.
That story about the guy in the copy shop is damn scary, but I love the last story. Not all of these "I don't work here" stories have to involve some idiot or maniac. Sometimes it's just about helping someone. And that's always worth telling.
That last story was such a beautiful one that it brought tears to my eyes. We need more people like that, always. ♥
Loved that last story. If I see someone struggling to get something at a store I usually ask if they need help. Knock on wood I haven't been mistaken for an employee yet. 😂
As an adult woman of 4' 10" I will often ask a complete random stranger if they would mind being tall for me and getting an item from a high shelf 😉😉😊
I always get the assistance I need as well as a little chuckle!!
@@shelleytorok1406 I've been tall for someone a time or two. 😁
Story 3: Dementia is a scary thing...and YES it can result in all the symptoms DF described.
The sad thing is if you want to know what a dementia patient acts like...just look at the Karen videos...Karens act exactly like a lot of the dementia symptoms.
Story 4: This kind of person that we all should aspire to be like...thank you OP for sharing a part of your life with the rest of us :)
Dementia is such a scary thing to deal with for the children of aging parents.
My grandmother (My adoptive mother/biological grandmother's mother) was losing her memory and was barely able to recognize any family members younger than my mother and her siblings by the end.
My mother (73 this year) is thankfully still mentally and physically capable, including shrewd and calculated financial decision making and preparation for the future.
As a man on the autism spectrum and without a lot of life skills and capabilities (I don't think I could ever get or hold down a proper job due to my anxiety issues, compounded by the pandemic and the overall rude and mean lean a lot of people have taken in the world of late), I'll end up relying on my adoptive sister (Biological mother) and adoptive brother (Biological uncle) and even my cousins (Biological uncle's kids) to get through life after mom is gone or starts showing signs of dementia or other mental decay.
I feel like losing my mom to dementia or alzheimers or other mental decay will be more traumatic than just her passing away. Her body would be alive the whole time, but it'd hurt to see her lose herself, lose her memories of who I am, who my cousins are, who my cousins' children are, etc. to such a disease.
I did/do years as voluntary work with light and heavy dementia, and ive lost count of agressive and heartbreaking stuff i saw. But they don't know they are agressive in the moment, it's like a switch in the brain.
That last story, let me tell you. I just turned 40 and grew up in the manly men and real men don't have or ever show emotion mind set. Stories like the one with the man in the wheel chair helping the old man had me feeling like I was chopping onions and didn't hold my breath. That kind of treatment and forgotten mentality is what briefly restores my faith in humanity sometimes. Thank you Fluff, your channel is one of my absolute favorites.
Such a sweet man, so heart-warming.
Okay the last story made me cry a little bit of sad tears and a little bit of happy tears. It's sad that showing such kindness is a very rare thing nowadays. I really wish a lot more people had the same caring heart as OP. Love your videos Peace and love to you and your family 💙💚💙💚💙
That was the best story I’ve heard in a long time. OP, you are the most kindness man I’ve ever read about!
that last story made me cry Why the hell isn't there more of that these days. How hard is it to be kind and decent to someone, regardless of who they are?
I love it when we can finish with a wholesome story
Last story was so sweet and that wheelchair guy is absolutely right that we need to be kind. If everyone did that we'd be better off
That last one was so nice.
It's a similar attitude my parents drove into me, just be kind where you can and hold a little empathy in your heart. I've never helped as much s this story though, just reaching high stuff or running interference with creeps for girls who look worried about them .
This is a story that makes my heart grow three sizes. I hoped people would be like this with my grandma when she was on her way out.
"9 seconds ago" damn I hit refresh at a good time. I love your stuff, Fluff!!! Brings my lunch break/workday so much joy!!!
Damn. That last story had tears running down my face.
Oh darkFluff, dementia sucks! My mom, a 4'11" soft spoken and polite woman became a combative and almost violent sailor. She made up some good swear phrases towards the end. The woman's worst swear was sh1t beforehand. My dad's mom had it worse, she forgot who everyone, including her husband and sister was. Gram was very healthy so this went on for years. Poor gramps and her sons. At least my mom remembered all of us. It was difficult to go through it all but I'd deal just for a day or conversation with mom again. Great videos Fluff!
On the dementia story, we had a friend that developed dementia. She had been one of the nicest people I knew but the dementia totally destroyed her personality. She became verbally abusive and physically violent. A friend who rented a room from her had to move out because she physically attacked her. It was so sad but dementia can really destroy a person.
the last story had me in tears op may not wear a cape but but he's a true hero I hope he has the best life imaginable and for the old man I hope he rests well at night knowing that no matter what situation people are in there will always be a helping hand near by
Story 4: I absolutely love OP went out of their way to help the elderly man get the things he needed and let man push their wheelchair so he could have some support. Kindness goes a long way. Wholesome. :)
"Buying stuff". Classic! 🤣🤣
That last story was BEAUTIFUL! I bet you could get some dedicated traffic to wholesome only story videos as well. It’s like the book line “Chicken Soup for the Soul”
Dementia sucks. My dad was the sweetest man; almost always pleasant and gracious. Suddenly he was an angry man who hated everybody and every thing. He refused any assistance, fought taking his meds and just yelled at everybody for no reason. Then my husband was diagnosed with dementia. Yep. Total opposite personality. It’s not easy to deal with and hurts even when you know they can’t help it.
The story of the man with dementia who assaulted the customer trying to help struck home with me. The men in my family develop fast onset dementia around 70. I watched my grandpa go from a sweet caring man to unpredictable and angry when I was 12.
My father and my uncle, who were his sons and a year apart in age, both suffered the onset at 72. My uncle was a concert pianist and could no longer perform. He would call me crying often because he lost the one thing that was his passion and deteriorated over the course of a year. He passed away from systemic organ failure.
My father started several months later and could not be left alone. He was very much like the man in the story. One day he got in his car, took off before we could stop him and found him driving around in a parking lot not crying because he did not know where he was or how he got there. He declined rapidly and then died of systemic organ failure too.
That last story was indeed very wholesome. It literally brought tears to my eyes. God bless OP for helping out that old man.
I loved the last story. It's really nice to hear some wholesome stories every now and then.
Beautiful last story. Absolutely beautiful.
Thank you for posting that last story Fluff, I was tearing up listening to it. More stories like this please :)
That last story had me crying. We need more people like him.
I haven't seen the rest of the video yet, but hot damn! How self-absorbed does one have to be to think they're the only customer in a dollar store?! 😂
"If he doesn't work here, why is he here?"
"I dunno, you don't work here so why are you here?" Is the required response imo