Dating Expectations | Ladies' Round Table | A Black Love Series
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ก.ค. 2024
- This week the ladies gather round to discuss dating while young, the benefits of being with a determined man, parenting adult partners, and developing relationship dynamics.
Moderated by millennial entrepreneur Jasmine Nicole (@reallyjsmn), Blacklove.com’s original digital series, Ladies’ Round Table, is an in-depth discussion amongst five Black women on aspects of love and relationships in the present day.
Filmed in pre-covid
For more information and articles on this topic visit www.blacklove.com
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This was great, but the title was a little misleading. I was hoping to hear more about dating from different age groups, but it was mostly about the balance with being a wife and mom
Although this was a good conversation, I wish the ladies spoke more about dating and the various aspects about that in today's day and age. Perhaps it's because the majority of the women here are married (correct me if I'm wrong), but because of that most of this video was steered towards topics that apply more to their relationships within their marriages as opposed to what a person who is single expects of their potential partner. I don't know... That's just my take on it.
2/5 were married but I definitely agree. I enjoyed the conversation but I think the topic is a bit off from what they have listed. I think it was more about what expectations people place on us and what expectations we as women sometimes put on ourselves. A nice little table talk though lol.
Jae Marie Yep, right there with you. 😊👌🏾
Totally agree, they only discussed their own personal relationships which has zero correlation to the topic of this vid 🙄😴
100% agree
I thought just me missed dating part because i was multi tasking...It should have been titled "Maintaining yourself and a relationship "
The topic was hijacked. The singles did not get to air their take much. Redo with no marrieds.
black love stop teasing us.... this episode need to be a little bit longer (anyone agree)!!!!
Thankfully, I'm happily married today. I'm horrified when I think about the idea of being single today. The games. The stupid, stupid games.
Im trying to tell you lol. Im not afraid to be alone but single again oh nooo lmaoo
This 🙌🏿
If you enjoy the ride wtf
Dating is hard. I swear its hectic
Darling it's not a game it's Strategies. Even the happiness marriage needs constant work.
Raising a human being is the most powerful thing you can ever do.
Keep hyping yourselves up....
I've been dating my lady for over a year, and I thought I knew how important communication was, but over the past year, I've really learnt the significance of it, it's key. I'm glad the ladies are touching on these dynamics and issues, 'cause once we move in together, I may have expected certain things of her without really seeing how she feels about them, and vice versa, now this is a conversation we can have, so that we are united in getting things done, not just around the house, but also in terms of achieving our personal goals. I love what this channel is doing, keep it going. 🖤
Communication is a big fact, trying to understand the dynamics of a relationship, since each situation is so different, all 1:1 between you and that person.
I agree with the woman in the blue who mentioned that a lot of men and women are dating and looking for mothers and fathers. Not literally and sometimes maybe not intentionally. People go into relationships with nothing to truly bring to the table. I call these “build-a-bear” relationships; like you literally have to spoon feed these individuals in efforts to help them get their lives together like a mother or father would. I wish that this topic was dissected a bit more because it should be addressed for the single people out here.
I do agree that it is ok to cook for your partner, clean, and do other domestic duties; but that should not be limited to women. A lot of men and women are not coming to the table with a vision or plan for their own lives, and that is where the mothering and fathering comes into play. Instead they come with overdue bills, bad credit, working at a dead end job that they hate, no passions in life, unorganized, past traumas that they have not addressed, etc. These people then get into relationships/marriages and their partner, who was not aware of all these things initially, are expected or feel obligated to help them get their lives together. That is why it is so important to ask the right questions before getting into a relationship.
True!...Most of the important conversations are ignored. Dreams, ambitions, plans to get there. How to grow each other .Core values. Instead of having such conversations, many people focus on ' sexual compatibility '. 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣.....what about all the other equally important compatibilities.
Is it really a dad, or a thug?!
How do you get in a Relationship without knowing these things initially?? Before you have sex...have a conversation. Don't assume. This is the start of a relationship. He has a job.
This video definitely wasn’t nothing what the title says lol however I enjoyed the video
More like dating & marriage life talk, but yes enjoyed
I know but still good
The problem is that a lot of men want *"stay-at-home-working-wives"* = you go 50/50 on the bills and 100 on the child-rearing/housework. The reason why grandma could cook from scratch & raise babies because, she did not have a 9-5 to go to. I believe marriage is a partnership & do what works for your marriage, if your husband cooks & you clean do it. Don't let anyone who's name is not on the *marriage certificate* tell you what to do.
...Did you even ask men what they think?
get a dog.
But thats yall women fault for wanting equality not ours so when you want equality dont be made at the responsible thats come with. Its like yall women say dating down cause a mans makes less then yall but remember all men date down all day and dont have a problem. So why complain about certain things but yall women want to equal as a man?
There are no Roles in 2021. We cook. Clean and take care of the kids together. You both have jobs and careers. It's not a Man's world anymore.
That means keep preachers out of your business.
I like women gathering and discussing. One of the things I miss most in this pandemic. As a single woman who has dated in LA one of the problems is that men think they are the prize. What can you do for them? How can you bend over backwards to please them? Rarely have I seen gentlemen who understands the word courting. Men doing the bare minimum and expecting the most and unfortunately women accepting the bare minimum. I'm off of dating for awhile.
That's often men's with women experience too.
This is much needed. Is it on TV? If not can it be. The fact that they are being so genuine it’s like listening to a conversation your aunties are having at the BBQ that ain’t none of your business, but you listening anyway cause one day it will be your business 😩
I absolutely love these round table talks. It’s interesting to hear varying female perspectives on life and love. One thing I will say about this video specifically. If your torn between motherhood and a career. What decisions went into wanting to juggle both at the same time? I personally feel like it’s ok to be selfish and chase your dreams as a woman. You were a woman before a mother. Why be stripped of that identity just to feel shame for doing what you love?
I so did not know I needed this convo I’m 29 and plan on moving and graduating I’m a single mother and all I find in my current state are ppl that are looking for a parent and not a partner I’m so excited to flourish and grow after hearing this thank you young black ladies true inspirations ❤️
Reading through the comments and was about to say I can’t relate to any of these women, but I can relate to you I’m 28 in Grad school obtaining my MBA and a single parent as well and dating I definitely different for us if u have a bad relationship with your child’s father u are looking for a bonus dad and if it good you get the freedom to focus more in depth of your own happiness
Great conversation but I would like to hear this discussion from women around their 30’s and 40’s!
The women’s round table conversations seem much deeper than the men’s round table.
I asked for a portrayal of a Black love from a younger demographic and you delivered. Thank you @blacklove!!! Representation matters.
Great conversation and these ladies are all very intelligent, beautiful and interesting.
Stay away from Men and Women LOOKING for Mom and Dad in a Partner. You want to build a relationship with someone whose confident. Please. Stop the bullshit "I'm not in a rush" I not looking for a Relationship. Have the courage to say "I'm looking for love" I want a relationship. Do everything in your Power to find your Soulmate. Just like you give time to find a job or a home. Ladies please stop CHASING these Men.
I wish this conversation could have been longer! So great hearing from a range of different Black women
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ! 🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️
Absolutely loved this, but can we get some MORE?! 😊
Expectations! That's was powerful 👏 thanks ladies.
I love this channel they have the best discussions 💕
I loved this conversation!! 😊
Great conversation!
I did not catch the BEAUTIFUL woman’s name in the white & black polka dotted blouse but sis was a vibe! I needed to hear you!
We need more of this!
Yes!
I think the stigma behind stay at home mom plays a part in breaking down a relationship and its something you as a woman feel like you have to do it and be it. That's such a horrible sacrifice bc its like takes away the joy of it based on the expectation of it.
Happy Valentines day beautiful woman and happy Sunday
Truth👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾, I was married for 15 years and was a whole 2nd Mama to my Ex (A Total Mama's boy with Mama issues -per a Counselor in the end), I had to pick me and go... #8yrsDivorced
I love when she said you can join the ride or not 😊
Sweet discussion!
The lady in blue said the simplest thing that makes relationships work, Men want a mother in their wife. Women want a father in their husband, It's as simple as that. You may not agree but it's the truth...
Even Myles Munroe said something like that in one of his videos on relationships/marriage
That is Horse radish, Chocolate Ladies are not academies, training boys or looking to Marry their fathers, That is perverse thinking. The ladies whom are marriage are most likely in 50/50 roles. Date with diversity and your whole perspective will change FOR DA BETTER. Where a woman is in her feminine energy, DO NOT DATE mAN FOR NO MORE THAN 6Months,Cos he will always see you as his MOTHER not his Life partner and that is YOUR FAULT for allowing it. Simple!!!
Queens, it’s important to have your own “plan”, your own goals, your own manifestations so that you don’t fall into the toxic norm of settling into someone else’s plan. When “plans” are one sided, someone suffers, codependency is created, their is an imbalance. Center and ground your self in your own vision and independence queens. Breaking the imbalances of gender norms requires that we level up. I think this table should have women from different parts of the US to open up the perspective a bit more. Look for partners, not parents . That’s how the cycle is broken. Therapy is bae, date therapy to unlearn a lot of this.
Don't you think that maybe plans are one sided because a relationship is about building that plan together and most people in relationships aren't actually doing that?
You are so wise
@briana.....you are so wise
I was thinking this the whole time thanks for saying it!
What about your plans and goals? I wanted to hear more about her manifestations and less of his.
I completely agree, it sounded very much much like he was leading and she was following.... but only with his permission.
This may not be the case but this is very much how it came across to me.
"What good are you if you are drained...?." 🤯🎯💯
Ok, y’all gotta pick better titles, this is probably the 2nd or 3rd video where it almost feels like the title of the video doesn’t encapsulate the actual conversation. But the conversation was good. I could relate.
Some people just like the thrill of the chase and hate getting it easy they want a challenge
And everyone always wants what they can't have !!!!
Wow 👏 love love 💘
I am moving to LA to pursue my dreams of being a Palm Tree🤞🤞🤞
Not that this isn't a great conversation
But I'm not really hearing the topic being addressed 🤨
I agree that a lot of people aren't looking for equal partners
Wonderful conversation, but maybe use a different title? I was waiting for the dating comments. 😁
Dating in 2021. Don't get caught up in Video dates. No. He wants to spend time with you. He opens the Wallet. And do not go to his place or invite him to yours. Meet. Coffee, drinks ice-cream. Meet face to face.
I wouldn't say that men and women are out here looking for mothers and fathers. Many of them are often looking for stability something that they didn't experience in their upbringing. I also think that if your involved with someone that doesn't have a plan do you not have a plan of your own? It's possible that they have a plan it just doesn't include you.
Yes. And if it doesn't include you...why would you want a Relationship with them?
@@CrystalDatingCoach That's the most important question
I’m someone who has too many expectations for others but can fulfill other peoples expectations and ya know what…
I’ll just be single at that point
Yes you need to focus on yourself
Omg theres no shade here. Thank god
Random but Sis in the blue has amazing arms .!! 😍
yhanni!
Also the rolls in this can be reversed for years I dated below my means to mother others that I felt like where broken and in all reality it broke me down so I feel like therapy is good for any stage of life I’m seeking one that takes insurances the moment. I have been a single mother for 12 years I’m tired of trying to mother grown adults as well and it would be nice to have an equal partner someone who’s work ethic is as strong as mines
Hay Hay I need all of you since there is a shortage of us men for you all in this country today I truely love all and this borthers men deeply because you are our sisters and I love all so stop being Scared
So you want a harem?
I realize nobody starts & stays on topic on this channel
The first speaker, I felt that. Real talk being born and raised in a city of transplants who claim to be from LA is the oddest thing. As a native, you ARE just versus in SEARCH of something. LA gets a bad wrap because of transplants posing and feeding into a narrative. IMO
I feel the same way with so many people moving from California to Las Vegas it has become a city of transplant.
where is the topic on dating for singles
I think they needa REDO!¿?...🤷🏽♀️
More like marriage and motherhood expectations
Is that is so cute one of you said your mom said when you're not looking for something that's when it shows up that is so true and anything you do then when other person said Society has expectations of gender roles and I feel before you get in a relationship used to talk about that because it is a two sided relationship not one get to know how each other was brought up is that way you can talk about it also when a man or a woman in a marriage make their partner feel secure and they trust each other's lead that person isn't going anywhere it is solid as a rock especially when God is in the middle of it and do book quiz the five love languages to see what your partner love language is and that builds a stronger relationship 2 Teamwork Makes the DreamWork in any relationship everybody should have a planner and my down three things they need to do a day no more then that so you won't get overwhelmed with your day
Where is the discussion around dating?
There needs to be a trained moderator that can help keep the focus on the topic. This was not at all about "dating expectations".
The title was misleading.
If you listen closely, you can hear them figuring out that men aren’t always the problem.
Yes a lot of men need therapy
In my opinion, I think that's an unhealthy way to put it...especially when you think the problem is because men lack access to therapy...without realizing we all need therapy
@@tolamasters8643 yes we all need therapy..why don't men value therapy? Why aren't more men in therapy?
@@keekonnect I find that a lot of women default to “therapy” for any personal problems, as opposed to saying these men need to “work on themselves.” Therapy can be expensive, and also doesn’t force one to take accountability - it just lends an ear. For some people, what they needs is to read a few self-help books and a good hard kick in this ass. I know women who’ve been in therapy for five years and haven’t changed a damn thing.😊
This is definitely about marital relationships. I question the two women who are okay with HIS pior vision determining the course of the OUR current marriage. Lazy!
I can't relate to pretty women and relationships 🤷 we average people don't get good men at all.
This video is for young women, more so. Where are the women of a particular age??
When you get married as a man and and as woman... Those roles of mother and father are waiting in the shadows for the kids to hit the scene, lol. Unless you are not going to have kids, warm up to the idea of those roles.
I think the conversation steered away from the title. Married mothers are not dating. They are married.
The one talking abt my husband uuuggghhhh well he iiisssss what is she talking about anyway
We not partners.. This team Cooper. I don’t mind paying 100% of the bills coming home cooking and cleaning. All I ask for is some help. Why do black women take “helping” as someone wanting you to be their mother?!
The video does not talk about dating expectations...... you need to have a panel of single woman talking about their experiences with dating and how expectation can sometimes hinder a relationship. Married woman should not be on a chat about expectations when it comes to dating sorry not sorry.
They never once talked about dating expectations
That sounds like what white women saying a lunch
Click bait much? 🙄
Stuck in his ways on manifestation. Sounds like he putting God 1st st all times. Thats better than a struggle and doubtful man. So its good she could acknowledge how her ego plays a role and is able to check it.
manifestation is the Devils work is not connected to God
So women are never happy 🤦🏿♂️