You are giving sage advice - it's about staying with your hurt inner child and using your adult self to tell them - I got you - I'm here and I got you, I'll protect you and you're safe now with me because I'm able to do that as an adult, but you as a dependent child could not get your needs met - so I got you
I watch my ex, on instagram but just because I hate him for ghosting me and then stalking me in order to destroy my life… oh wait he’s not avoidant, just an ass.
I try to look at it like this - no matter how much anyone hurt you, they are teaching you a valuable lessons or showing you your blind spots. No one said it would be a comfortable lesson to learn. But I completely understand you. Hang in there ❤️
My ex and I don’t have social media so signs 1 and 3 are out. I can’t tell if he is trying to reconnect when he texts me now either. I assume its breadcrumbs and haven’t been replying. His last message was a question if I knew the date of his last colonoscopy so I replied with the answer and he thanked me and that was it. He could have asked his doctor for the date though really.
I will say I really wish in these videos people wouldn’t put so much of a focus on the social media aspect. Not everyone has that. After our break up I got rid of Facebook Messenger because I really only kept it for little things and people I didn’t have in my contacts list on my phone. Both of us never posted on social media.
My ex never stop checking my stories since our break up, she constantly watched, sometimes she will post sad songs, or sing my favourite songs and will put it on her WhatsApp status, she sometimes posts her pictures... And i have a gut feeling she wants me to reach out to her.
So after 6 weeks of no contact, she unfriended me on my birthday. I don't really post anything. There were no problems with the relationship (that had been communicated), she just said she was scared of being hurt and broke up, said she couldn't give me what I need. Said she can't do relationships because of her childhood trauma.
My ex looked at my story one time and this was in the beginning where I had left him. But now I noticed that he have resurfaced two x's on the front of his six people on his page and I noticed that after I went no contact to him for about 4 weeks and some days he demoted me down on his Facebook friends list I don't know if by me reaching out and we had our conversation which I asked him did we want could we talk and he said yes but we text instead of talking on the phone and the text was casual and it was short I didn't keep him long I got off and I told him to take care so ever since then I noticed he had put me a demoted me on his friends list and the two x's serviced on his front of his page
What if it’s been 4 months of no contact and he contacted me about something stupid and it happened to be my birthday and the next message was a happy birthday message. What do you think this means?
@@seemu2927 he most definitely isn’t the center of my world but I never imagined at 41 years old an adult behaving this way. It’s very manipulative and confusing.
A lot of people would call that kind of thing an “indirect, direct” contact. It likely means he’s testing the waters to see where you are, and it could be a good sign if you want him back. However, do NOT freak out and run with high hopes. If he was the one to break it, HE needs to be the one to clean up his mess. DON’T CHASE! Match his energy, or even come up short. So, if he says “happy birthday,” just say “thank you.” Then, say nothing more. Also, don’t reply right away - wait a few hours. And, if he texts at night, wait until the next day to respond. If he texts asking “how’s the dog?” or something dumb along those lines, reply briefly, but upbeat, or even flirty with something like “still barking.” Then, let it drop. Wait for consistency, but don’t have expectations. And, don’t get anxious and start checking your phone again like you were at the start of it all. Go back to living your life and being you. It may be he won’t text again for another few days or even weeks, so be patient (I know, it’s been four months - how much more patient should you be?! I get it). But, if he starts to do it more often, and those messages get more meaningful, take it as a good sign. Hell, take even this as a positive - he was thinking about you! HOWEVER…remember YOUR value and worth, and don’t fall into the trap of getting sucked back in. However much you may still love him and want him back, remember what HE did! Evaluate whether or not you want to risk a repeat of all of this! But, if he starts being consistent and comes around again, make him PROVE he’s not going to pull the same shit, and make him EARN you back day by day, or even hour by hour! If he’s changed and sincere, he’ll stay and work on things. But, this time, YOU keep one foot out of the door, and make it clear that one hint of bullshit and he will never see YOU again! If he really has changed and has reflected, after being without you and seeing what that was like and not digging it, he’ll be less prone to do it again. But if he just wants validation, and wants to hang on to you, but doesn’t actually WANT you via commitment, cut him loose! Ball’s in YOUR court now…
They can’t stay alone they stick to family and new supplies and they replace you with someone for the weekend
You are giving sage advice - it's about staying with your hurt inner child and using your adult self to tell them - I got you - I'm here and I got you, I'll protect you and you're safe now with me because I'm able to do that as an adult, but you as a dependent child could not get your needs met - so I got you
Thanks for your honest advice, really helpful.
Of course Anna! Thanks for watching :)
You must be Kari grown up from the Incredibles.
I watch my ex, on instagram but just because I hate him for ghosting me and then stalking me in order to destroy my life… oh wait he’s not avoidant, just an ass.
I try to look at it like this - no matter how much anyone hurt you, they are teaching you a valuable lessons or showing you your blind spots. No one said it would be a comfortable lesson to learn. But I completely understand you. Hang in there ❤️
My ex and I don’t have social media so signs 1 and 3 are out.
I can’t tell if he is trying to reconnect when he texts me now either.
I assume its breadcrumbs and haven’t been replying. His last message was a question if I knew the date of his last colonoscopy so I replied with the answer and he thanked me and that was it.
He could have asked his doctor for the date though really.
I will say I really wish in these videos people wouldn’t put so much of a focus on the social media aspect. Not everyone has that. After our break up I got rid of Facebook Messenger because I really only kept it for little things and people I didn’t have in my contacts list on my phone. Both of us never posted on social media.
Exactly
My ex doesn’t post on social media either
My ex never stop checking my stories since our break up, she constantly watched, sometimes she will post sad songs, or sing my favourite songs and will put it on her WhatsApp status, she sometimes posts her pictures... And i have a gut feeling she wants me to reach out to her.
So after 6 weeks of no contact, she unfriended me on my birthday. I don't really post anything. There were no problems with the relationship (that had been communicated), she just said she was scared of being hurt and broke up, said she couldn't give me what I need. Said she can't do relationships because of her childhood trauma.
Good morning Natalie happy Sunday morning and I loved your vlogs and you are amazing Supporter
Thank you!
My ex looked at my story one time and this was in the beginning where I had left him. But now I noticed that he have resurfaced two x's on the front of his six people on his page and I noticed that after I went no contact to him for about 4 weeks and some days he demoted me down on his Facebook friends list I don't know if by me reaching out and we had our conversation which I asked him did we want could we talk and he said yes but we text instead of talking on the phone and the text was casual and it was short I didn't keep him long I got off and I told him to take care so ever since then I noticed he had put me a demoted me on his friends list and the two x's serviced on his front of his page
Watching stories doesn't mean anything. Some people watch everyone's story. This is misleading.
Exactly. Sometime I just doom scroll bc I am bored. Which leads to me accidentally watching one of my exes stories who I dumped. 😅
It was 7 months or so. She watched a clip of a snap I put up and then unfriended me then went to Instagram and blocked me. So guessing she is over me?
same
The video cut out at the end. What was the 3rd way?
Yes! The second part was just uploaded today
i appreciate this so much, i love your podcast
:) glad you love it
What if it’s been 4 months of no contact and he contacted me about something stupid and it happened to be my birthday and the next message was a happy birthday message. What do you think this means?
Move on. Life for yourself and find your own happiness. A person should never be centre of your world
Move on. Life for yourself and find your own happiness. A person should never be centre of your world
@@seemu2927 he most definitely isn’t the center of my world but I never imagined at 41 years old an adult behaving this way. It’s very manipulative and confusing.
A lot of people would call that kind of thing an “indirect, direct” contact. It likely means he’s testing the waters to see where you are, and it could be a good sign if you want him back.
However, do NOT freak out and run with high hopes. If he was the one to break it, HE needs to be the one to clean up his mess. DON’T CHASE!
Match his energy, or even come up short. So, if he says “happy birthday,” just say “thank you.” Then, say nothing more. Also, don’t reply right away - wait a few hours. And, if he texts at night, wait until the next day to respond.
If he texts asking “how’s the dog?” or something dumb along those lines, reply briefly, but upbeat, or even flirty with something like “still barking.” Then, let it drop.
Wait for consistency, but don’t have expectations. And, don’t get anxious and start checking your phone again like you were at the start of it all. Go back to living your life and being you.
It may be he won’t text again for another few days or even weeks, so be patient (I know, it’s been four months - how much more patient should you be?! I get it). But, if he starts to do it more often, and those messages get more meaningful, take it as a good sign. Hell, take even this as a positive - he was thinking about you!
HOWEVER…remember YOUR value and worth, and don’t fall into the trap of getting sucked back in. However much you may still love him and want him back, remember what HE did! Evaluate whether or not you want to risk a repeat of all of this!
But, if he starts being consistent and comes around again, make him PROVE he’s not going to pull the same shit, and make him EARN you back day by day, or even hour by hour! If he’s changed and sincere, he’ll stay and work on things. But, this time, YOU keep one foot out of the door, and make it clear that one hint of bullshit and he will never see YOU again!
If he really has changed and has reflected, after being without you and seeing what that was like and not digging it, he’ll be less prone to do it again. But if he just wants validation, and wants to hang on to you, but doesn’t actually WANT you via commitment, cut him loose!
Ball’s in YOUR court now…
If I don't have social media at all?
@bulldog1080p none of mine did.
why would you want them to come back when you just said you would not care any more?
Natalie, can you talk about what how they react when they see you with another man and they realize that you wont wait on them to be ready forever?
stop clapping into the mic please
I get passionate
I can understand but I find it so masculine when women talk like it. Please take this as constructive criticism no harm intended
Does anyone care what you find masculine? That's your issue not constructive criticism.
This is based upon her past experience 🫠🤣🤡