It's been said that men fall in love with their eyes and women fall in love with their ears. However with age comes wisdom. Men learn everything that "glitters" is not gold and women learn that actions speak louder than words. If you want something different you have to do something different. "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary." - Oscar Wilde
Love this, and right in line with finding an elevator person :). Find someone who elevates you - and not just rely on things our body or society tells us are right :)
@@k-mac5511 You can find someone Christian but most men at church have OK Bodies, but their faces are average. Your love is there, but he will be an average man but he will be an Elevator person. The Mormon church has some great men but most women don't see that. Most women are interested in GQ Models like Sean Opry. 2024, October.
@@smartdatingacademy It's hard for anyone to find someone such as this because most people are just cruel. The Ted Talk was and is beautiful, but love is hard to find in this cold world. 2024 USA
This is one of the best and most useful TED talks I have ever heard. I knew a lot of this, but I have never heard it said so clearly, so understandably, and so effectively. Many thanks.
I cried when she talked about Anna and how Anna took a minute to start dating people who made her happiest. I just was disappointed by a guy who wasn't ready for a relationship. and I did pick him based on the list of being cute and ultimately being a caring good person even though he wasn't tall and he was a little socially awkward. and I'm proud of myself for following the correct list looking for how happy I felt. even though he wasn't at the point in his life yet to commit, and open up yet, I do feel like he was an elevator person.
Never really had a successful relationship and I am 44. My dream girl would be kind/sweet into the arts and beautiful in my own eyes. Someone who loves to be silly and ok with that
@@Lavendeer201 I think elevator love is for those who are young. Older people will have a hard time finding love because of Ageism. Older women are really picky.
I raised my hand when you asked who here has fallen in love with the wrong person. The wrong person doesn't reciprocate. I am alone. There is no we against all. The object of my attention and affection not only did not feel the same, but now does not dwell among the living, but in memorial. Now, my late, lost love. It is about finding one you feel good about devoting your time to; everything else is half-stepping. You can 'mark time' only so long, then you are seen for who you are- a pretender in the relationship.
@@SmartDatingAkademy Women are very visual! Do you recommend that Women get hypnosis so they can make that great change in their life love wise? 2024,USA
@@SmartDatingAkademy hi bela, loved your 😆 talk,I hope god 🙏 fulfills all your wishes and you are my new role model lol and what's the name of your company?
@@SmartDatingAkademy Elevator people needs to be taught in sociology. I took sociology in college and this term was never in there. It should be in there. College is a meat market. It's all about Chads. It's never about normies finding true love with a Hottie, a Stacy or a Beckie. 2024, October. USA
True. It's very easy to keep 'tossing people back to the pond' when we don't want to find love :). Best of luck to you and thank you for your comment. xo Bela
We all have our attractions and our check lists and that largely determines who we consider dating, but most sensible people don't stay with their partners for a longer term unless these people stirr something inside them. We can't choose dating "elevator people" because it takes TIME to build such meaningful relationships..
The most important thing to me in a guy is one who’s sincere and dedicated (2 things, actually). I’m still single for 5 years already. Every time I meet someone who seems sweet, approachable and positive, even if he’s not my “dream guy” physically, I try to connect and sometimes even slightly hit on him with the remaining force of optimism within me. They either refuse or just suggest some other male friends they have, who never attract me even the slightest. So no, maybe love is not for everyone. Maybe after 5 years of trying to meet and date and do it with all the hopefulness within me, with a big smile and a self-empowering feeling that I shouldn’t give up, I finally do. It’s been a struggle, but I’m finally done with it. I only wish to succeed in life to survive financially in this hectic, violent and cold-hearted world, and keep doing the things I do best to enlighten both others’ lives and my own. A guy who truly sees me and wishes to have the most profound and ELEVATED relationship of his life, simply doesn’t exist. Believing he does? It has only caused me sorrow, a broken heart, a false sense of warmth and nothing but unmet expectations. I’m off to cherish myself even in loneliness.
I feel sad for you. I understand such people are rare. All i can say is be kind and caring even if u don't get such people. And i hope you will get one such person who will make you laugh and happy all day. Who knows one day someone will find you❤
we can keep hoping, that's what there is to life. Hope we can see a new day, hope it will be pleasant. You are right, keeping your expectations down is good. Can we just enjoyy life, and cherish our successes, learn from failures. Maybe there are still somethings we need to do be4 meeting that person. Ever thought about purpose?
I’ve been trying to apply this to my dating life but even when I stay open to meeting new people, even the ones that don’t initially conjure any particular feelings in me, I still don’t connect to the right guys. Not even for friendship. It makes me wonder what I’m doing wrong. I’ve done the deep inner work and am committed to continuing with it. This is a sensitive part of my life as I truly want to be with someone I can share my life with and grow and learn and experience all sides of love with. It gets tough.
It's because it often takes a bit of sampling to marry for willful love, rather than out of necessity or survival. All the survival traits should be there too in each partner, but now you get to also find the physically healthy plus emotionally healthy, since we're in a modern, relatively safe world (in 1st world nations).
@@dorcasc1811 I think looks is a big key here for all of us. You may find someone nice, but he is chubby. Or someone may find someone nice but she is chubby and has a face full of zits. This elevator thing is like communism. At times, it does not translate well in real life. We are just too hard wired on looks. 2024, October.
The problem with love is that it predates language. It's something we're programmed to do but it is being smart that prevents us from just loving. Think about it for a second. Those that stay together for life, do so because they ignore everything else. My dad was retiring from the military and mom was a stay at home mom and I'm sure it was very stressful as they made the transition between the military and civilian given the lesser income and more hour but yet they stuck together and never questioned their marriage. They've been together for 40 years. When you stop thinking, you realize what is more important.
Fabulous and inspiring talk and idea! Imagine how much better our lives and the world would be if we endeavored to be elevator people to others and also looked for fellow elevator people in our lives? So simple and yet, so impactful.
Bela, this is a fabulous presentation! It is good to listen to this regularly in order not to forget we need to love ourselves first and the characters of our friends and partners. We all need "elevator people" in our lives!
Of course, first liking/loving yourself & granting yourself grace, etc is always the best place to start from when seeking other people to love & be loved by ❤ T
Dream women: Who loves me limitless (most imp) Who takes care of me/ Who is there for me always Who scold/ slap me for my wrong doings or bad habits Who has kind thoughts for not only me but for everyone * Its ok If she is not much attractive, not have good pleasant voice. (I never thought of these things honestly) What will i do : Love her more (obviously) Take care of her/ be there for her always Try to fulfill financial needs (all the basic needs); and also try to fullfill other money related wishes for her (i cant promise this one tho) Visit places holding her hand and make lovely memories NEVER EVER make circumstances leading to divorce or make her thing i don't love her Appreciate her good works and help her get rid of bad habits/ doings Always support her and share my every thoughts and plans with her NOTE: im not too good at looks and not tall. I am not rich right now i do have financial limitations for now.
Great discussion, there is so much to learn here. What more amazing is it's free knowledge. Thank you so much! Learning life is a only thing which can make you a perfect personality human being
Looks like my elevator friends are broken because if i fall down, i am falling down very fast and nobody will be there. Thanks life, you teached me how to cope with falling bad on your own 💫
This was fantastic. I believe her, but it's still hard. Finding the right person is tough. But, I will make my list with elevator people qualities and the next time I date, I will use that list instead of the "perfect man list."
I found a love that's lasted since 1987. She's never made me happy; nobody can do that except me. She's never been mine. But it's been the most important love from someone not related to me I've known. I would be happy if I found someone I can continue to be happy with. But I don't care about how long it will last.
I'm moved by the authenticity and depth of this content. A book with parallel ideas profoundly changed my life. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
❗Yes❗ It's BEST to seek internal qualities and not external attributes . HOWEVER, MAKE SURE that the person who possesses the internal qualities you NEED, make sure they pursue you or the interests is mutual, otherwise, you will be waiting indefinitely for him to make the right move. Make sure his intentions are shown through ACTIONS & not words💝
Lol. I am only looking for a kind-hearted man who is educated enough to educate our future children on how to be good and disciplined human beings. That's all, and yet I can't see that it in anyone who tries to get in my life. It's been 5 years since I am single and my family is already worried that I'll end up alone all my life.
Sending you BIG love and luck and finding your Elevator Person!! You've got this, and if you need more information to help, there are tons of videos on our TH-cam Smart Dating Academy channel that can hopefully help! xox Bela
@@SmartDatingAkademy Thank you so much. I will surely watch all your other videos; I already did and I just can't stop admiring your teachings. God Bless you a lot❤❤❤
What happens when you begin to really love someone is that you want to please them. You don’t want to hurt that person in some way. This can be our guidance on this human journey. That we always consider when making a decision, “Is this pleasing to the Supreme Lord or not?” If a person feels that they want to be in the world of love and not in the world of lust, then all they need to do is hold onto the love and mercy of the Supreme Lord. This loving connection will protect you. Regularly hear and sing His Holy Names. We would like to share a very nice ancient wisdom quote: Pure love for the Supreme Lord is eternally established in the hearts of the living entities. It is not something to be gained from another source. When the heart is purified by hearing and singing, this love naturally awakens.
Make sure to have similar values and same ideas about important life topics. Be real because it will come out anyway if you fake it in the beginning. Online dating is what YOU make of it.
I think she had a lot of amazing points. However, I don’t feel like it’s as easy as what she is saying.. it would be amazing if we could do just that… it’s nice to hear success stories though
She’s right about one thing…evolution is the problem. It should have stopped at the dog. They’re loyal, trustworthy, playful, protective, unassuming, selfless, don’t keep records of wrong, etc. Basically….not human.
Am I the only one who has settled for those who don’t meet my list but yet I have a shot thinking things could work yet they didn’t time after time and now I just feel like I should be pickier and simply increase my standards until someone is at par w me.
Hmmmm the secret to finding lasting love is self love! Not looking outside your own heart for your salvation! Knowing who or what you are first, this and this alone attracts the “elevator people” then you can truly be in communion with your love interest. Ultimately we are LOVE! Never being born nor dying, we are THAT SOURCE! Enjoy!
Damn! your comment does not need a TED but it went straight to the point and without all that typical "funny" stand up circus and jokes. your comment involves all. Congrats !
love isnt something that reside outside of you so you dont find it by looking outside of your selve you find everything by going within its the true eesense of who we are and thus reside within us no one other than self is need The love we have longed for all our lives isnt going to be delivered by a relationship the peace we have longed for isnt going to be delivered via a situation it has to be internlized
If you are superficial about the things you believe you have to have in your life - well, then you really need the lesson this woman teaches you. Might this be a specific USA-problem? According to the rates of failure, I guess it might be.
I'm a single american living in europe and it seems that there is less superficiality here on the dating sites, less emphasis on career status, income, how tall you have to be. I'm not saying it's non-existant but there is less of it. Character, ie. honesty, kindness etc. are higher on the priority list.
My friends, the ones that I can count on, are my exes, and no, I have no desire to get back with them. We had horrible relationships. Friendship is different. So how do I fit into this equation?
It's been said that men fall in love with their eyes and women fall in love with their ears.
However with age comes wisdom.
Men learn everything that "glitters" is not gold and women learn that actions speak louder than words.
If you want something different you have to do something different.
"Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary." - Oscar Wilde
Love this, and right in line with finding an elevator person :). Find someone who elevates you - and not just rely on things our body or society tells us are right :)
wow...really awesome lines....thanks for sharing!
Not interested in some 40 yr old single mom
Men fall in love with their heart.
Dream man
1. It's positive, calm, patient
2. Loyal and honest
3. Uplifting, about growth
4. Hard working, values family
5. Supportive and loving
I hope you will get one ❤
6. Christian, active in his faith
@@k-mac5511 You can find someone Christian but most men at church have OK Bodies, but their faces are average. Your love is there, but he will be an average man but he will be an Elevator person. The Mormon church has some great men but most women don't see that. Most women are interested in GQ Models like Sean Opry. 2024, October.
I think we should focus not only to find elevator people, but and to be elevator person for someone ❤️
that's a great thought✨,everyone fail to realise that
HONEST FRIENDS !
I really like your thought process
So true.
You're absolutely right
Fake friends are easy to find & easy to lose
But good friends hardest to find & hardest to lose.
absolutely
You're 100% right. Elevator People™ take time to find, and effort to keep. And, we can be Elevator People™ to everyone in our lives as well!
This means I never had a real friend because they are all easily lost when they are needed most.
My grandfather: he always there for me, supportive, trust me even when myself don’t, witty, humorous, I feel safe around him,
like I always say, if you fall in love with other people's character you will find happiness in yourself for a lifetime
100% true :). Find an "Elevator Person™"!
@@smartdatingacademy It's hard for anyone to find someone such as this because most people are just cruel.
The Ted Talk was and is beautiful, but love is hard to find in this cold world. 2024 USA
This is one of the best and most useful TED talks I have ever heard.
I knew a lot of this, but I have never heard it said so clearly, so understandably, and so effectively.
Many thanks.
Thank you so much. You’re an Elevator Person ♥️💕
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
✚２３４８１４０7９９３２３🇺🇸🇺🇸⏭⏭⏭
TLDR; being shallow will find you "shallow" love. Look for "deeper" traits in people and you'll find deep love.
If only we could teach emotional awareness, empathy and kindness and values in our education system...
education?? nah. family system will work best for teachings like this
@@coffeeandgrind Both will work. Family and school will do well in teaching it to people. 2024
This is the sign you are looking for ❤️
Yes!! You are so right!! Thank you!! xo Bela
To break up with him, yes
I cried when she talked about Anna and how Anna took a minute to start dating people who made her happiest. I just was disappointed by a guy who wasn't ready for a relationship. and I did pick him based on the list of being cute and ultimately being a caring good person even though he wasn't tall and he was a little socially awkward. and I'm proud of myself for following the correct list looking for how happy I felt. even though he wasn't at the point in his life yet to commit, and open up yet, I do feel like he was an elevator person.
kindness, if a person isnt kind nothing else will substitute
Never really had a successful relationship and I am 44. My dream girl would be kind/sweet into the arts and beautiful in my own eyes. Someone who loves to be silly and ok with that
I’m 52years old widow and business owner and ain’t giving up on love yet.💕☝️❤️
I wish I had that confidence♡
@@Lavendeer201 I think elevator love is for those who are young. Older people will have a hard time finding love because of Ageism. Older women are really picky.
This is the most realistic talk on dating and love
Thank you so much - I'm glad it resonated with you. Wishing you nothing but love!
I raised my hand when you asked who here has fallen in love with the wrong person. The wrong person doesn't reciprocate. I am alone. There is no we against all. The object of my attention and affection not only did not feel the same, but now does not dwell among the living, but in memorial. Now, my late, lost love. It is about finding one you feel good about devoting your time to; everything else is half-stepping. You can 'mark time' only so long, then you are seen for who you are- a pretender in the relationship.
Wishing you love and luck in the future. We have all fallen in love with the wrong person, and I send you optimistic vibes and energy :)
Sorry about what you’ve been through Bruce
@@SmartDatingAkademy Every kind word or thought is precious. Every deed is a sign from above. May I be worthy of the hope held for me.
So sorry to hear that .
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Put yourself first, and then you’ll attract someone similar.
YES!! Be an elevator person too! xo Bela
@@SmartDatingAkademy Women are very visual! Do you recommend that Women get hypnosis so they can make that great change in their life love wise? 2024,USA
Listening to these at 2x is a game changer, lots of speakers talking too slowly
Haha fellow ADHD person? 😊
not this one. it's so obvious. learnt nothing at all.
no, most people talk too fast. everything is too fast nowerdays
I loved this!!!👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Thank you! ♥️♥️♥️
Elevator people! How beautifully explained!! Will always remember this term.
Thank you so much - makes me smile :). xo Bela
@@SmartDatingAkademy hi bela, loved your 😆 talk,I hope god 🙏 fulfills all your wishes and you are my new role model lol and what's the name of your company?
@@SmartDatingAkademy Elevator people needs to be taught in sociology. I took sociology in college and this term was never in there. It should be in there. College is a meat market. It's all about Chads. It's never about normies finding true love with a Hottie, a Stacy or a Beckie. 2024, October. USA
Many people just want to be alone and accomplish that by claiming the other person isn't up to their standards.
True. It's very easy to keep 'tossing people back to the pond' when we don't want to find love :). Best of luck to you and thank you for your comment. xo Bela
@@SmartDatingAkademy Many people are seeking perfection with a "heart." 2024, USA October.
We all have our attractions and our check lists and that largely determines who we consider dating, but most sensible people don't stay with their partners for a longer term unless these people stirr something inside them. We can't choose dating "elevator people" because it takes TIME to build such meaningful relationships..
You're right -- dating takes TIME, and to figure out if someone is an "elevator person" takes TIME! Thank you for watching!! xo Bela
Zero divorces ? Bravo
Please TH-cam algorithm sent this video to every girl out there🥺, my life would be so much easier.
LOVE this! Thank you! xo Bela
The most important thing to me in a guy is one who’s sincere and dedicated (2 things, actually). I’m still single for 5 years already. Every time I meet someone who seems sweet, approachable and positive, even if he’s not my “dream guy” physically, I try to connect and sometimes even slightly hit on him with the remaining force of optimism within me. They either refuse or just suggest some other male friends they have, who never attract me even the slightest. So no, maybe love is not for everyone. Maybe after 5 years of trying to meet and date and do it with all the hopefulness within me, with a big smile and a self-empowering feeling that I shouldn’t give up, I finally do. It’s been a struggle, but I’m finally done with it. I only wish to succeed in life to survive financially in this hectic, violent and cold-hearted world, and keep doing the things I do best to enlighten both others’ lives and my own. A guy who truly sees me and wishes to have the most profound and ELEVATED relationship of his life, simply doesn’t exist. Believing he does? It has only caused me sorrow, a broken heart, a false sense of warmth and nothing but unmet expectations. I’m off to cherish myself even in loneliness.
I feel sad for you. I understand such people are rare. All i can say is be kind and caring even if u don't get such people. And i hope you will get one such person who will make you laugh and happy all day. Who knows one day someone will find you❤
we can keep hoping, that's what there is to life. Hope we can see a new day, hope it will be pleasant. You are right, keeping your expectations down is good. Can we just enjoyy life, and cherish our successes, learn from failures. Maybe there are still somethings we need to do be4 meeting that person. Ever thought about purpose?
"Anna" Great story , every single person must hear this .
Thank you so much!!
I’ve been trying to apply this to my dating life but even when I stay open to meeting new people, even the ones that don’t initially conjure any particular feelings in me, I still don’t connect to the right guys. Not even for friendship. It makes me wonder what I’m doing wrong. I’ve done the deep inner work and am committed to continuing with it. This is a sensitive part of my life as I truly want to be with someone I can share my life with and grow and learn and experience all sides of love with. It gets tough.
you just havent met the right person yet! genuine connection is hard to come by :)
I hear ya 100%.. let’s go on a date 😊
It's because it often takes a bit of sampling to marry for willful love, rather than out of necessity or survival. All the survival traits should be there too in each partner, but now you get to also find the physically healthy plus emotionally healthy, since we're in a modern, relatively safe world (in 1st world nations).
@@dorcasc1811 I think looks is a big key here for all of us. You may find someone nice, but he is chubby. Or someone may find someone nice but she is chubby and has a face full of zits. This elevator thing is like communism. At times, it does not translate well in real life. We are just too hard wired on looks. 2024, October.
The problem with love is that it predates language. It's something we're programmed to do but it is being smart that prevents us from just loving. Think about it for a second. Those that stay together for life, do so because they ignore everything else. My dad was retiring from the military and mom was a stay at home mom and I'm sure it was very stressful as they made the transition between the military and civilian given the lesser income and more hour but yet they stuck together and never questioned their marriage. They've been together for 40 years. When you stop thinking, you realize what is more important.
terrific presentation. May God continue to bless her to guide others in finding love ❤
Thank you so much Sheena - sending you big love!
Fabulous and inspiring talk and idea! Imagine how much better our lives and the world would be if we endeavored to be elevator people to others and also looked for fellow elevator people in our lives? So simple and yet, so impactful.
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
✚２３４８１４０7９９３２３🇺🇸🇺🇸⏭⏭⏭
Thank you Ashlee!! I'm so glad you've found your Elevator Person, and LOVED sharing the TEDx experience with you. Looking forward to your talk!
Bela, this is a fabulous presentation! It is good to listen to this regularly in order not to forget we need to love ourselves first and the characters of our friends and partners. We all need "elevator people" in our lives!
THANK YOU Peggy!! Love you!
Of course, first liking/loving yourself & granting yourself grace, etc is always the best place to start from when seeking other people to love & be loved by ❤ T
Thanks a lot , now I have finished with the mistake and I find out my lover
Good luck to you in finding a lovely partner :)
I love the Elevator People story! And my new goal- to become a psychotic optimist!
Thank you and love this!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
✚２３４８１４０7９９３２３🇺🇸🇺🇸⏭⏭⏭
Dream women:
Who loves me limitless (most imp)
Who takes care of me/ Who is there for me always
Who scold/ slap me for my wrong doings or bad habits
Who has kind thoughts for not only me but for everyone
* Its ok If she is not much attractive, not have good pleasant voice. (I never thought of these things honestly)
What will i do :
Love her more (obviously)
Take care of her/ be there for her always
Try to fulfill financial needs (all the basic needs); and also try to fullfill other money related wishes for her (i cant promise this one tho)
Visit places holding her hand and make lovely memories
NEVER EVER make circumstances leading to divorce or make her thing i don't love her
Appreciate her good works and help her get rid of bad habits/ doings
Always support her and share my every thoughts and plans with her
NOTE: im not too good at looks and not tall. I am not rich right now i do have financial limitations for now.
Great discussion, there is so much to learn here. What more amazing is it's free knowledge. Thank you so much!
Learning life is a only thing which can make you a perfect personality human being
Thank you so much!
@@SmartDatingAkademy wx
Looks like my elevator friends are broken because if i fall down, i am falling down very fast and nobody will be there. Thanks life, you teached me how to cope with falling bad on your own 💫
Everyone wants good partner who take care.
Very true! Choosing elevator people is an amazing step to get there!
@@smartdatingacademy yeah!!!
@@GauravKumar-ri4en Best of luck to you!
This was fantastic. I believe her, but it's still hard. Finding the right person is tough. But, I will make my list with elevator people qualities and the next time I date, I will use that list instead of the "perfect man list."
So glad to hear that you'll do the Elevator List!! It will change things for the better!! :) xoxo Bela
That gonna be cool.. how about we go for a date Suzanne? You can use the list on me😊
Elevator People = love it. Great Tedx!
And as a 5'8" man = THANK YOU.))
I found a love that's lasted since 1987. She's never made me happy; nobody can do that except me. She's never been mine. But it's been the most important love from someone not related to me I've known. I would be happy if I found someone I can continue to be happy with. But I don't care about how long it will last.
Do you really love and respect yourself?
Such a great observation! I already knew to pick my friends this way...now to try it for potential romantic interests.
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
✚２３４８１４０7９９３２３🇺🇸🇺🇸⏭⏭⏭
Thank you! So glad it helps, and keep us posted :). Love and luck to you!
I'm moved by the authenticity and depth of this content. A book with parallel ideas profoundly changed my life. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
A great 10 minutes Bela! Looking forward to 12/5! I'll be thinking about who in my life elevates me.
Thank you SO much!! Can't wait to have you on the Love Lab workshop :)
How about us been together, working hand in hand and makes things work out by being there for each other? By the way I’m Robertson
❗Yes❗ It's BEST to seek internal qualities and not external attributes .
HOWEVER, MAKE SURE that the person who possesses the internal qualities you NEED, make sure they pursue you or the interests is mutual, otherwise, you will be waiting indefinitely for him to make the right move. Make sure his intentions are shown through ACTIONS & not words💝
Lol. I am only looking for a kind-hearted man who is educated enough to educate our future children on how to be good and disciplined human beings. That's all, and yet I can't see that it in anyone who tries to get in my life. It's been 5 years since I am single and my family is already worried that I'll end up alone all my life.
Sending you BIG love and luck and finding your Elevator Person!! You've got this, and if you need more information to help, there are tons of videos on our TH-cam Smart Dating Academy channel that can hopefully help! xox Bela
@@SmartDatingAkademy Thank you so much. I will surely watch all your other videos; I already did and I just can't stop admiring your teachings. God Bless you a lot❤❤❤
@@wegotthis3031 God bless you too! And thank you!
So simple but so wise
kind, fun to be with, nice to all kinds of people
Elevator people... because they... elevate you...
Yes!! You got it! ♥️💕♥️
Super amazing talk....kinda really useful....thanks for sharing!!
I always think that way !
♥️♥️♥️
Who would have a relationship - any relationship - with someone who does not make him feel good, make him happy ?
A lot of people unknowingly…
Bella! This is fantastic - so glad to be able to finally see it. Great job, friend! - Dr. Kristen
Thank you SO much, Dr. Kristen! Love you and your support - I can't wait for YOURS! xoxo Bela
Simple, yet powerful👍👍
So glad it made an impact - thank you for the kind words! 💕♥️🙏🏽
What happens when you begin to really love someone is that you want to please them. You don’t want to hurt that person in some way. This can be our guidance on this human journey. That we always consider when making a decision, “Is this pleasing to the Supreme Lord or not?”
If a person feels that they want to be in the world of love and not in the world of lust, then all they need to do is hold onto the love and mercy of the Supreme Lord. This loving connection will protect you. Regularly hear and sing His Holy Names.
We would like to share a very nice ancient wisdom quote: Pure love for the Supreme Lord is eternally established in the hearts of the living entities. It is not something to be gained from another source. When the heart is purified by hearing and singing, this love naturally awakens.
😂😂😂good one...I so agree
hope i can find the one that i really choose and chooses me back as well
Make sure to have similar values and same ideas about important life topics.
Be real because it will come out anyway if you fake it in the beginning.
Online dating is what YOU make of it.
Thanks for the words of wisdom.
You’re so welcome! ♥️💕🙏🏽
Fantastic, Bela! I felt like I was watching a good friend. Thanks for sharing these important tips for finding lasting love. ❤️
Wow! Thank you so much! ♥️💕♥️
I think she had a lot of amazing points. However, I don’t feel like it’s as easy as what she is saying.. it would be amazing if we could do just that… it’s nice to hear success stories though
Sometimes hearing the most obvious thing is just what we need to make the light bulb go off.
So glad it turned the light bulb on! ♥️💕🙏🏽
So sad to be seeing this now. But I guess it is better to have loved and lost.
It's never too late - wishing you the BEST!!
@@SmartDatingAkademy Thank you Bela. Didn't expect YOU to reply. I really appreciate this video aloooooot.
This was fantastic! I'm so proud of you!! Also, I'm proud to report - that's him! ❤️
Thank you so much!
And I am sooo glad that’s HIM! ♥️♥️♥️♥️
Height, looks, attractiveness ...surely not!
How can people want pick their life partner based on their looks. How can we still be so shallow?!
Attraction is important, but you're right, it's not everything (especially if you're looking for long term love)! choose "elevator people™" instead!
Hi there 👋
খুব ভালো বলেছেন❤️
She’s right about one thing…evolution is the problem. It should have stopped at the dog. They’re loyal, trustworthy, playful, protective, unassuming, selfless, don’t keep records of wrong, etc.
Basically….not human.
😂 🐕
Bela this is fantastic! Really clear and thoughtful. Great perspective based on all your expertise.
Thank you so much, Andy! Much appreciated ♥️♥️
Am I the only one who has settled for those who don’t meet my list but yet I have a shot thinking things could work yet they didn’t time after time and now I just feel like I should be pickier and simply increase my standards until someone is at par w me.
You’re not the only one who has settled! Choose people that elevate you next time and you’ll be on a better path hopefully ♥️
I am also in the situation where i don't want to talk to anyone i just want to stay alone .Now I think love doesn't exist.
This was incredible talk
Thank you so much! ♥️💕♥️
That was fantastic, inciteful and such good advice!
Thank you so much, Ellen! All the best to you!
Hi Ellen.. I’m Robertson, can I know you more?
Yes, I agree
Daughter, you got a gift
Thank you so much!
Great Job Bela!
Thank you so much!
such an awesome talk. really liked it
Hmmmm the secret to finding lasting love is self love! Not looking outside your own heart for your salvation! Knowing who or what you are first, this and this alone attracts the “elevator people” then you can truly be in communion with your love interest. Ultimately we are LOVE! Never being born nor dying, we are THAT SOURCE! Enjoy!
Damn! your comment does not need a TED but it went straight to the point and without all that typical "funny" stand up circus and jokes. your comment involves all. Congrats !
I certainly agree 100%. This is metaphysics. The Awakening 👍🏼
Hello 👋
Optimism is the one quality more associated with success and happiness that any other.
Brian Tracy
Absolutely - become an optimist, or a "psychotic optimist!" It's a more fun way to live life :). xo Bela
This is really a good TEDx talk ❤️
Thank you so much! xo Bela
@@SmartDatingAkademy you're welcome Ma'am.
🙏🏽💕
J think I should focus on those that gives me joy
Yes exactly!! Love that you understood that!
@@SmartDatingAkademy it took me time tho cause I never wanted to fall in love again
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
The big secret to finding love is living in a place where there are available women and being affluent enough to support them. That's it.
Thank god I saw this 🙏🙌
Thank you so much!
I’m 30 years old and may not be the tallest but I have lots of love to give and if that day came, I would do anything to make her happy. Anything
Best of luck for that ❤
Its good discussion, thanks a lot
Thank you so much!
@@SmartDatingAkademy you're welcome
Terrific advice!
Thank you so much!! xo Bela
❤this is so inspiring ❤
Go Bela!!
Thank you love! You’re the best! ♥️💕♥️
All true thumbs up!
There must be a reason I found you on TH-cam
Yes! There are no such thing as coincidences! xo Bela
love isnt something that reside outside of you so you dont find it by looking outside of your selve you find everything by going within its the true eesense of who we are
and thus reside within us no one other than self is need The love we have longed for all our lives isnt going to be delivered by a relationship the peace we have longed for isnt going to be delivered via a situation it has to be internlized
Awesome !
❤️ it!
So true! I have a list, but will make some changes! 😊
Love your enthusiasm for love!
Thank you so much and I hope you’re feeling optimistic too! ♥️💕
I didn't notice a single word about what Anna could give her partner. What qualities did she have that mached his elevator-list?
Good question - we had ten minutes for the talk so I couldn't cover everything! xo Bela
We'd probably know if he were the client.
Just an observation, but I detect bitterness in your question.
If you are superficial about the things you believe you have to have in your life - well, then you really need the lesson this woman teaches you.
Might this be a specific USA-problem?
According to the rates of failure, I guess it might be.
Thank you! xo Bela
Divorce isn’t a USA specific problem 😂 people are naturally just superficial
I'm a single american living in europe and it seems that there is less superficiality here on the dating sites, less emphasis on career status, income, how tall you have to be. I'm not saying it's non-existant but there is less of it. Character, ie. honesty, kindness etc. are higher on the priority list.
@@geoffoakland that’s really interesting and good to know - hope you find love there!
@@geoffoakland
Thanks for being able to grasp our vibe😜.
Great perspective! Love this:) 🔥
Thank you so much!! You’re the best ♥️💕
Difficult to weed out the valuable speeches from the people just trying to promote themselves or practice public speaking. Oh Ted how you’ve changed
My friends, the ones that I can count on, are my exes, and no, I have no desire to get back with them. We had horrible relationships. Friendship is different. So how do I fit into this equation?
Hi Lisa! How're you doing?
@@russeltodd2824 I'm fine, thank you.
@@lisalamphier1410 Oh! Glad to hear from you, where are you from?
@@russeltodd2824 I'm glad to hear that you're doing so much better. My ex wife just got out of the ICU today. She's doing a lot better too.
@@lisalamphier1410 Wow! I just thought you were a female..Lisa should be a feminine name I guess
imagine if there was one person for everyone
it is very one-sided if one person is the elevator and the other is the heavy load
I'm dating a guy who has no hair, a beard and has two children he's also my best friend
Awesome ✨ love her ❤️
Thank you so much! ♥️💕♥️
Good!
Thank you!!