The Science of Online Dating | Bella Glanville | TEDxPCL
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ม.ค. 2021
- The eternal search for true love continues to boggle scientists minds to such a point they created algorithms for it. What if those algorithms were actually gunk? Some psychological studies suggest they might be. This talk discusses the scientific theories behind the personas that we find on the internet, and what makes an online relationship sustainable vs unendurable This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
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We have only started dating online in the past 20 years, after 200,000 of dating in person online dating is simply out of sync with what humans have evolved to do. It's a disaster.
Why does it affect u
I feel the same way.
99% are looking for quick wins.
Only 1% is patient.
There is no competition there.
Huge potential if you know how to use the right tools right.
“12% of people who use online dating find a committed relationship.”
Absolutely incredible talk!
She's right. People considerable relationships disposable. Marriages and significant others are considered disposable by many.
Omg I love her delivery!! This stuff is crazy :0
I tried online dating. Couldn't make it work. Utterly impossible to get the ratio of carbon-12 to carbon-14. Now I do that part of archaeology only in the lab.
Radiocarbon dating... Classic.
Very good presentation and she's made some really valid points. The disparity in online response rates between women and men has resulted in a lot of men developing self esteem issues, particularly if they're not a part of the top 20% of men aesthetically. The successful 20% of guys find that they're in a really unique position whereby they can have their pick of dates but ironically then are always looking for the bigger, better deal so the women are simply used and discarded. Online dating is great in theory but in reality it's really, really flawed. Many daters burn out and get fed up of the apps after a while once this realisation hits them. There's a growing number of people who are ditching the apps and going back to trying to meet in traditional ways because of the many downsides of the online world. It's going to be interesting to see how things evolve in the next decade.
In reality it's only the top 5% of guys that get any attention on dating apps.
True and about 95% of women go for that small set of men and ignoring the vast majority of "regular" guys
I enjoyed this video but the one thing I thought she was wrong about was when she said " we cant fall in love with people based of their personalities, they have to pass the attraction test first " online dating never created this....its always been this way.
if certain metrics aren't met first, (physical attraction) then you aren't going to be able to be open to anything else they might have to say if these baseline metrics aren't met first. personal qualities are more important than, attraction, ....but alot of people just arent wired to look past that and see the person for who they are a make a good mate selection based of things that are going to be good for them in the long term.
3:22 Love the sweeping diagnosis of a generation without a shred of evidence. So much for "science"
very humbling
What about partnerships that form in virtual worlds such as games where you have an avatar/character that doesn't particularly represent the way you look in real life? Can they develop into something meaningful? Seeking individuals are exposed to the personality aspect rather than the aspect of looks (at least in the early stages of getting to know the person). Questions are: depending on how fast they set the pacing into finding out every detail of their life, does it determine how quickly the interest might dissolve? And are most people forming some sort of imagination of how their interest might look like which can cause dissapointment later on when said imagination turns out to be of significant difference? Thirdly, do people who choose to search for love in virtual spaces actually have a desire to go for the real deal (the real life)?
Flawed. Women receiving more matches cannot be assumed to be men caring less about looks online.
There are so many reasons for this. It would take too long here to go into why men swipe first, look at the profile after if reciporicated.
yeah I was thinking that too, for one thing men are much less careful regarding intimacy so they'll cast a wide net, for another they know matches are harder to get so they compensate by swiping right more often.
There IS Ratcheting Effect: If she wants A,B,C,D,E qualities THEN I want qualities A to H in them. So implicit bartering. Expectations grow.
///
There is also Comparative Worth, a bundle of traits somehow on the balance scale of status, wealth, age, appearance, & BAGGAGE. I AM PRETTY JADED & SOMEWHAT EXPERIENCED with Insightful Questions but NO answers.
* There are books of questions (no right or wrong) for awareness & conversation.
* Do you keep test driving bicycles ??
* Dive in like a Kamikaze ??
* Nobody's perfect; and, THERE WILL BE ROOMMATE ISSUES.
IT'S YOUR THING. GOOD LUCK FINDING MR. OR MS. GOOD BAR (see movie summary, Diane Keaton).
Everybody is balancing short term & long term needs.
Currently, online dating is typically the most popular way to meet your better half. With countless singles using some of the leading dating services to find their soulmates, we are no longer in the era where online dating was regarded as a no-go zone.
Perhaps the reason for the acceptance and success of online dating is the increase in the number of dating sites and the advancement of the internet and technology.
still sucks using them and the use of them leads nowhere
Swipe left
I have “never” made eye contact with someone and thought they were the love of my life!
I came here looking for answers. Wanted to know how can we actually have a meaningful conversation which leads to in person meetup. But apparently the video was a waste of time
Jfs, , fabio,,paz, ,,que Deus lhe proteja,,
Hello Hi
Good point, woman look for a man more attractive than themselves, that makes the dating market sucks for huge part of man
Us guys don't do the same?
Seems kind of basic
Shallow thinking, picking out of context element to fit your point and not even trying to look at the big picture. There is more adhd because the definition of adhd itself changed. There is more non monogamie because it wasn't even a social option 50 years ago. Brushing off such important details aka context means you are just wasting my time.
So...
Everything is exactly the way, any reasonable and sane mind could figure out on itself after 5 minutes of online-dating.
Cool.
Astecas
Just find a person in real life.
I concur but, Real life is becoming crazy too. I'll just get a basenji.
Online dating apps just makes it easier to talk to people. People these days just don't know how to talk to people in person
Am i first
Fake: internet is a chain connected to 0. I don’t authorize any of your usage.
Time to unmatch TEDx Talks.
I need good friend who love and believe jesus chrusty
So she completely stated the obvious, waste of my time
It's a nice talk but her way of interpreting some studies was a disaster
Right? And her thing about ADHD skyrocketing... We actually don't know that. We've really just recently gotten a good understanding of adhd and so while it may look like it's increasing it's also entirely possible we've just gotten much better at diagnosing it and fewer people with it are going undiagnosed as opposed to it's becoming more common. And the reality is likely somewhere in the middle.
I disagree with you. Everything she said was right I wrote my dissertation using this talk. It's really accurate.
@@DesignTechnologyTV I agree
Awful communication skills and voice
this is underrated
Oh yeah. Do you love me? 😍💋 💝💖❤️
ew