Hey Guys, hope you enjoyed the information about male postpartum depression. If are ready to become the best version of yourself as a father and want to go from confused to confident, you would love my Parenting Program. Book a call with us to learn more: www.daduniversity.com/application/?=ytc71
Just a little overwhelmed with life at the moment with 2 girls under 5 and struggling with my own mental health for my entire life. I currently see Is a mental health professional and we are on a treatment plan.
@@P_sharkey410. thats great to hear man! Im doing the same its not easy especially financially. Im just learning on taking a day at a time and focusing on all my blessings I have. Im taking lexapro its helped me overcome anxiety and panic attacks. Im better today.
Nice try! But the thigs you say to cut out of life like alcohol, junk food, screen time etc. are "vices" Vices are necessary to keep a struggling individual from going over the edge.. so to speak. It is very easy for a happy "put together" person to say "Oh just dump all ur bad habits and everything will be fine. " Real life is not like that! Real people have vices which help them navigate everyday life. Over 70% of adults drink alcohol, or at least tried it. That's so they can try to enjoy life and blur away all the negative experiences. I came here looking for advice on depression because I'm about to be a father. My depression comes from knowing that when the baby is born, I will loose my entire identity and all my time and money! And what will I get in return? ? ? hugs after work???? Not a fair trade PLEASE HELP!!
Same bro, Severe TBI due to combat during my USMC days so I struggle with this daily and kinda underestimated the whole dad thing. It’s so crazy this isn’t widely available for us fathers
The best advice from this video is getting support. My culture has such a stigma about getting therapy and being vulnerable. My parents have told me things like, "This is just how it is," and I felt that my feelings were invalid. I decided to go against cultural norms and am currently going through therapy. I want to be the best person for myself, my family, and my friends.
I appreciate you doing this. More men need to hear this! My current situation; my girlfriend six weeks into an unplanned pregnancy. We're both in our mid twenties. I just graduated from my bachelor's program last year, so I'm still of my parents. My girl is a Community nurse right now and lives with her sister after they're dad kicked them out. To make matters worse, I've been unemployed for a month and feel like shit because I'm unsure what I want to do as a career. Now with this pregnancy, I'm just feeling worse... I don't know where to start. It feels like this couldn't have happened at a worse time. Super depressed sleeping in and struggling to motivate myself like a used to be able too. Definitely feel like a failure rn. I'm not ready for a child, she claims she wants to make the decision together, but I'm sure she wants to go through with it
Take a step forward even if it's a small step. Sounds like the first step is to secure employment. Even if you don't know what you want to do, get a job while you determine that. You may have to try a lot of things before you find something but you need an income and to get back your confidence. You can do this!!!
Thank you for your response! My goal, for now, is to apply to 5 jobs a day every day, 5days a week. And I'm up watching hour video on the financial implications of going through with the pregnancy
Super helpful video. I'm in it now, about 7 months postpartum. Definitely good to know that I'm not alone. I think the toughest part is, I'm pretty good at making healthier choices when I'm depressed and needing more self care. I just find it so much harder to actually do those things now that our son is here. Trying to take it one day at a time and look for small victories as I can. Also, I've got to say, we've been blessed with a baby who sleeps, and this is still so hard. My heart goes out to all you parents who have to navigate this with major sleep interruptions.
Just brought my first child home today and now I’m at work researching PPD… Never heard of this EVER until our nurse told us before discharge. I’ve had a rough time this whole pregnancy with my emotions and depression (USMC Vet with a TBI/ Severe depression&anxiety) so I know the signs of my depression coming in but this was a feeling I know now is real. After seeing your video I will be contact my PCD ASAP for professional support. Thank you for the information. I was worried about making everything okay for my wife and daughter but now I know I need to check in on myself as well✊🏾
Great topic! It can be really hard to transition to being a father, but it can also be SO rewarding! I definately think exercise, diet, and nature are great ways to combat this. Also, make sure to join the right community!
So I had those risk factors, and then the COVID-19 pandemic hit. I feel relief that I don't have to explain this and help my son navigate this world yet, he is still under a year old. Getting support now is hard, it is wrapped up in anxiety.
Many insurances are covering behavior health appointments during the pandemic, some at no cost to you. If you can call your insurance to see what options you have. This is a site to check out. They have a postpartum men forum. postpartummen.com/postpartum-depression/ Additionally, you could call your child's doctor. They should be able to provide support to you and your family.
Thank you for making this video, it is really a blessing for me. My baby has just passed her 1st month and sometimes I was on the verge of tears over something that should be logically simple. Your video gave me encouragement to overcome my blues, and at least I can be at ease knowing that I'm not the only one going through this. Thank you.
My baby is only 8 weeks and I am going through this right now. This video was definitely helpful and I am currently seeking counseling. Thank you for posting.
2 of the biggest things that have kept me afloat are meditation and exercising. Meditation helps keep my stress levels down and helps me keep a cool head through all the craziness going around. Exercising has become a lot harder to do mainly because of time. The few weeks after my daughter was born I would actually do pushups and other basic exercises at work. I had to wait until she got her vaccines but she's now old enough for the day care at the gym so no excuses!
Thank you for this video. It was very helpful. I think adding exercise to the list is a must. While it is hard to get up and out for a workout (especially when feeling down), it NEVER HURTS and usually helps clear some of the negative fog. Swimming and surfing are the most potent for me.
I never knew about this… and everything is making sense, but I’m pulling through and mentally in a better spot now. Now that I know what to look for I appreciate this video
Great Topic. I am going through this at the moment. I am hoping to put these tools into action. Extremely hard when you are dealing with other life stresses etc. Thanks Jason for the support.
Yes it is hard. Understand you are not alone as it's very common. That doesn't make it easy but I'm confident you can come out on top. Keep your head up 😉
Just recently found this channel, and as of the many dads going through anxiety/depression; it's a struggle. my 2 month old isn't that bad, but when he struggles to sleep or relax I get upset that he's that way; then I feel worse for feeling that way. It seems like it's unreasonable to feel this way, so watching that i'm certainly not alone and it's a real thing. it helps, it really does. These videos are great; as much as i'd wish one video would all of a sudden make things better, I know it wont, hopefully it helps me work towards that goal. Seems to come and go, one minute i'll be more "ok" with it, the next i'll get that feeling in my gut and not know how to handle it.
You are on the right path. Give yourself a break and some self-acceptance. It happens, it just can take some time. Practice makes perfect (or at least good enough :)
Totally understand your experience Chris. I have struggled with the same thing with our 2 month old. So many raw feelings/lows and hard to sift through it all and not take it personal. I feel ya
4 days old for me and I’m already going through. I have major history so researching PPD is my 1st priority to help my wife, daughter and bonus-son thrive. You got this brother
My wife was cured of postpartum depression. My wife Maya was a 32-year-old fit, vibrant lawyer. we been married for more than five years and was expecting our first child, a baby boy. She had a history of depression and generalised anxiety disorder. She was doing well with a combination of medication and cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) for many years. Maya had decided in the months leading up to getting pregnant that she wanted to be off medication and worked with her psychiatrist to carefully get off medication. She continued weekly therapy. She was mostly active, upbeat and cheerful during her pregnancy. She gave birth to a healthy 7.3-pound baby boy. After the delivery, she started to feel sad, overwhelmed and consistently tearful. She frequently felt irritable and on edge. This feeling persisted for the first 10 weeks after the baby was born. My wife felt utterly incapable of soothing our baby and get frustrated and tearful. She was so afraid of what she had learned about sudden infant death (SIDS), that she would barely allow herself to sleep. She felt that it was a constant race against the clock-with nursing, pumping and changing. She was always cleaning bottles and diapers. She felt horrified with how she looked. She had expected to wear pre-pregnancy clothes immediately after childbirth. She hadn't had a meal in peace or gotten her hair or nails done and couldn't even think about having sex. My wife’s psychiatrist said she could't control Maya's mental state. They talked about a variety of tools, including CBT, incorporating 15-20 minutes of daily relaxation, mindfulness skills, hiring help, getting her Mom to stay with her for a few weeks and other support. I understood the urgency of the situation and offered to take time off work and to do some of the overnight feedings. Nor of this could work as she get more worried. She always feel tearful and felt she was a "failure as a Mom." our baby cry incessantly and she could barely get sleep. Our baby also had high level of bilirubin and had a bit of neonatal jaundice and she blamed herself for it. After being monitored in the NICU, he was sent home. postpartum depression got my wife frustrated until we got to do some search is there could be a permanent way to cure it and found a testimony of a lady cured by Dr odia, After being monitored in the NICU, We decide to contact the Herbalist for a cure. All our pains and sorrows turn to joy and history from the day we came in contact with Dr Odia, Who really help with his herbal herbs, I WAS TOLD HE IS A HERBALS AND HE CAN BE OF HELP, We gave him a try and it really worked for my wife, if anyone having same issue you can reach him via: ( Dr Odia Herbalist Home) on Facebook or via( drodiaherbalistcenter@gmail.com) He will help get your heart desire granted.
I have a 20-month boy and a 5-month baby girl and my wife and I both feel suffocated. Hard to do coursework or focus. Finances and sleep deprivation are probably the biggest factors, but I also just feel unfulfilled as a person. Don’t know if I can get a therapist right now, but I could definitely do more meditation and the like.
My twin boys are 4 months old... I love my sons very much, but my wife and her emotional roller coaster constantly puts me down...... Every day existence is just pain for me...
Thank you so much for this video, just a few weeks ago my baby was born happiest day of my life. At the hospital they spent an hour educating my girlfriend about ppd no one even once said anything about dad. Guess what? My girlfriend is jolly and flying like a butterfly but out of nowhere this huge depression cane on me and kicked me I got so confused. Feelings of anger and irritation, I disconnected from the world no contact with anyone all my friends telling me congrats on text haven’t replied to a single one in weeks. Feel like crying all the time and had a nervous breakdown few days ago. This video really helped me I am starting to take steps to get better thanks
Hang in there. Being a father is a roller coaster, but one we would keep getting in line for. It isn't always easy but you will make it through. Keep your head up and try to practice gratitude. I have to tell myself that all the time :)
You are so right. At the hospital and at doctor appointments education about postpartum should be given to BOTH the mother AND the father. postpartummen.com/
@@DadUniversity I meant no disrespect in sharing more ways to get help. I recently came across the website and thought I would share it because it is another way for those who are struggling to get help.
I don't know if I have this but I am a first time dad and my son was born almost two months ago. I'll have moments where I feel really sad and I don't know why. Sometimes this happens and I don't want to be around my son because of it. Then it goes away and I'm fine. It comes in waves. I still like doing things I used to enjoy. I exercise and eat a low carb diet. My wife said shes been feeling depressed on and off herself. I hope it goes away.
I have all these (Except I don't smoke and drink). The worst part is my wife is going through PPD so I have to suck it up. I feel inadequate and most of the time I feel like just better off dead because I make so many mistakes and I can't seem to do things right.
Please understand we all make mistakes. I have made a ton and still do constantly. It's part of the learning process. Instead of thinking that you are failing, understand you are learning. We all feel inadequate. However the awesome part is that you are not at all. You are normal. You are a new parent learning how to deal with all of this new stuff. Your children need you. If you are really having bad thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline @ 800-273-8255. It does get better.
I was depressed b4 being a dad. I love my son but the work load causes serious burnout for me. Not to mention the anxiety about his health. Its gnarly, and there is NO info. out there......
@Little Wizard,I'm going through the same thing.How did you get over it before u became a Dad?My wife wants a child but I'm having anxiety and she is an amazing person.
@@musicgrynd too be quite honest your kid can also have an opposite effect...in that the pure joy kinda cancels out everything else....timing too, not a time to get off meds.....it is our birth rite to produce/or not...in terms of diapers, balancing work ect. plan,plan and more planning all the way down to the socks your gonna wear the next day...
Thanks mate. Watching this from the UK. Just had a new born who I adore but keep getting thoughts about what happens to her when I’m gone. Hoping it’s a transitional period for me. But I’m prepared to get professional help. Thanks again.
In my case to take that step of looking for support was the hardest part and also the look in the eyes of your partner was tough to take in when you tried to make her understand your feelings. She will have that look on her face she is the one who is pregnant and carried our child for almost a 8 month and I felt like stupid and I was not a man. I couldn't understand what I was going through. I was smoking cigarettes a lot about a pkt of 30's ciggy a day. Working at 2 jobs and only 4 hrs of sleep and sometimes less sleep than that. I was angry all the time and the good thing about me was everytime i had arguments with my x, i was never aggressive to her, all i did I would walkout of the house and go for a long walk n the air in the house was unbreathable . I knew my relationship with my x partner was already messed up and there was no turning back n I couldn't do anything about it. The thing is some woman thinks that only woman can go through post-partum. The hardship I been through was a torture. My advice to all the young father's that are going through this please seek help and talk or one day you will wake up and realised it's too late and lost everything
But do you do when you think your husband has postpartum depression, but he doesn't want to go to the doctor or get any help... He doesn't bound or feel anything about our baby. Like if he wasn't the dad. He desire have a big family always, and now he feels like a failure.
I can understand it can be frustrating if someone doesn't want help. All you can do is communicate to them that you are here for them and will help them any way they need.
I dont if this is what I am experiencing, or not. But I feel down, hopeless, neglected, i feel like i only exist to provide money, i feel like my wife is completely ignoring me, and does not care about me.
Tell your wife you would like to sit down and talk, and calmly tell her how you are feeling. That is the only way it could get better. Just be honest and stay strong.
All different reasons. Anxiety is worrying about the future and depression is typically being upset about the past. We often do both and changes in our lives can really take us for a spin. The key is to realize you are totally normal for feeling this way and there is a way out. It can be better.
Dad University thanks for the clarification! I feel like I’m more scared or worried than I let on and it’s causing issues with my partner and I. I want to be strong for her but this is my first kid and her second so I’m not sure how to handle the stress
Who said you have to be "strong"? You can be supportive of her and still have anxiety for yourself. But remember everyone feels it. Give yourself permission to feel and it often reduces it's power. Don't hold it in. Sometimes focusing on our partner allows us to worry less about ourselves. You will be awesome
I'm a man of duty and mind over matter not emotion, I doubt it will happen to me but watching this just in case, baby will be due in October. Really looking forward to it but I'm so tried from taking care of my wife still I wouldn't trade any of this for the world.
What do ya do when your wife shits on every effort you make as a father? Im deffo depressed but there is no way out of it. Tonight my girl was crying non stop and she would only stop crying if i kept lifting her up and down. Wife couldnt stop her either just when i lifted her up and down which i was struggling to do as my arms were giving out. Then my wife tells me to stop doing it. Some nonsense about her not liking the way her head was shaking. I felt like going out and drowning myself in the river.
Watch my other videos on not allowing other people to determine how you feel. You get to decide. Nobody can make you feel, we get to choose how we feel.
My husband isn’t bonding with our second child he works a lot . He’s expressed this more than once . As a mom this hurts so bad he says he loves her but I’m afraid of favoritism being a thing . He also wants more children but with this situation I don’t think we should have more of he feels like this .
Has he been examined for PPD? I had PPD when my daughter was born and did not feel bonded to her until she was about 3 or 4 months. I loved her but I didn't feel "in love." After speaking with my doctor I realized that I had PPD and when I started to feel better that "starry-eyed" feeling really kicked in and now I see my girl as the best thing to ever come into my life :).
Nice try! But the thigs you say to cut out of life like alcohol, junk food, screen time etc. are "vices" Vices are necessary to keep a struggling individual from going over the edge.. so to speak. It is very easy for a happy "put together" person to say "Oh just dump all ur bad habits and everything will be fine. " Real life is not like that! Real people have vices which help them navigate everyday life. Over 70% of adults drink alcohol, or at least tried it. That's so they can try to enjoy life and blur away all the negative experiences. I came here looking for advice on depression because I'm about to be a father. My depression comes from knowing that when the baby is born, I will loose my entire identity and all my time and money! And what will I get in return? ? ? hugs after work???? Not a fair trade PLEASE HELP!!
Lack of sleep, financial stress and relationship stress are situational stressors after a baby, that’s not postpartum... it’s not a hormonal or physiological change caused by baby now being outside of body.
What a strange pedantic hill to die on. Whether you agree with it being classed as a form of "postpartum" or not is wholly irrelevent to the topic at hand.
My baby is only 8 weeks and I am going through this right now. This video was definitely helpful and I am currently seeking counseling. Thank you for posting.
Hey Guys, hope you enjoyed the information about male postpartum depression. If are ready to become the best version of yourself as a father and want to go from confused to confident, you would love my Parenting Program. Book a call with us to learn more: www.daduniversity.com/application/?=ytc71
Just a little overwhelmed with life at the moment with 2 girls under 5 and struggling with my own mental health for my entire life. I currently see Is a mental health professional and we are on a treatment plan.
@@P_sharkey410. thats great to hear man! Im doing the same its not easy especially financially. Im just learning on taking a day at a time and focusing on all my blessings I have. Im taking lexapro its helped me overcome anxiety and panic attacks. Im better today.
Nice try! But the thigs you say to cut out of life like alcohol, junk food, screen time etc. are "vices" Vices are necessary to keep a struggling individual from going over the edge.. so to speak. It is very easy for a happy "put together" person to say "Oh just dump all ur bad habits and everything will be fine. " Real life is not like that! Real people have vices which help them navigate everyday life. Over 70% of adults drink alcohol, or at least tried it. That's so they can try to enjoy life and blur away all the negative experiences.
I came here looking for advice on depression because I'm about to be a father. My depression comes from knowing that when the baby is born, I will loose my entire identity and all my time and money! And what will I get in return? ? ? hugs after work???? Not a fair trade PLEASE HELP!!
Family History of Depression, Poor Diet, and Sleep Deprivation. I’ll get through this with the help of this. Dads Unite!!!!
Same bro, Severe TBI due to combat during my USMC days so I struggle with this daily and kinda underestimated the whole dad thing. It’s so crazy this isn’t widely available for us fathers
Never knew this was a thing, I just “toughed it out.” Nice to have my feelings validated.
The best advice from this video is getting support. My culture has such a stigma about getting therapy and being vulnerable. My parents have told me things like, "This is just how it is," and I felt that my feelings were invalid. I decided to go against cultural norms and am currently going through therapy. I want to be the best person for myself, my family, and my friends.
I appreciate you doing this. More men need to hear this!
My current situation; my girlfriend six weeks into an unplanned pregnancy. We're both in our mid twenties. I just graduated from my bachelor's program last year, so I'm still of my parents. My girl is a Community nurse right now and lives with her sister after they're dad kicked them out. To make matters worse, I've been unemployed for a month and feel like shit because I'm unsure what I want to do as a career. Now with this pregnancy, I'm just feeling worse... I don't know where to start. It feels like this couldn't have happened at a worse time. Super depressed sleeping in and struggling to motivate myself like a used to be able too. Definitely feel like a failure rn. I'm not ready for a child, she claims she wants to make the decision together, but I'm sure she wants to go through with it
Take a step forward even if it's a small step. Sounds like the first step is to secure employment. Even if you don't know what you want to do, get a job while you determine that. You may have to try a lot of things before you find something but you need an income and to get back your confidence. You can do this!!!
Thank you for your response! My goal, for now, is to apply to 5 jobs a day every day, 5days a week. And I'm up watching hour video on the financial implications of going through with the pregnancy
Instead of the financial implications, watch motivational videos. Fill your mind with positivity and get moving forward. You'll be awesome!
Hows things man??
Hey men what happened?
Thank you brother. I’m going through this right now. So glad the topic is being brought up.
Super helpful video. I'm in it now, about 7 months postpartum. Definitely good to know that I'm not alone.
I think the toughest part is, I'm pretty good at making healthier choices when I'm depressed and needing more self care. I just find it so much harder to actually do those things now that our son is here. Trying to take it one day at a time and look for small victories as I can.
Also, I've got to say, we've been blessed with a baby who sleeps, and this is still so hard. My heart goes out to all you parents who have to navigate this with major sleep interruptions.
With you brother. You got this.
Just brought my first child home today and now I’m at work researching PPD…
Never heard of this EVER until our nurse told us before discharge. I’ve had a rough time this whole pregnancy with my emotions and depression (USMC Vet with a TBI/ Severe depression&anxiety) so I know the signs of my depression coming in but this was a feeling I know now is real. After seeing your video I will be contact my PCD ASAP for professional support. Thank you for the information. I was worried about making everything okay for my wife and daughter but now I know I need to check in on myself as well✊🏾
Great topic! It can be really hard to transition to being a father, but it can also be SO rewarding! I definately think exercise, diet, and nature are great ways to combat this. Also, make sure to join the right community!
This is the best answer for most things in life. For me, these I believe things are the most important things altogether.
So I had those risk factors, and then the COVID-19 pandemic hit. I feel relief that I don't have to explain this and help my son navigate this world yet, he is still under a year old. Getting support now is hard, it is wrapped up in anxiety.
Many insurances are covering behavior health appointments during the pandemic, some at no cost to you. If you can call your insurance to see what options you have. This is a site to check out. They have a postpartum men forum. postpartummen.com/postpartum-depression/ Additionally, you could call your child's doctor. They should be able to provide support to you and your family.
Thank you for making this video, it is really a blessing for me. My baby has just passed her 1st month and sometimes I was on the verge of tears over something that should be logically simple. Your video gave me encouragement to overcome my blues, and at least I can be at ease knowing that I'm not the only one going through this. Thank you.
So glad it helped. Stick with it and try to relax about it. While it is hard, everything will be ok!!
Seriously man, I haven’t cried this much in….EVER. Lol stay strong bro✊🏾
My baby is only 8 weeks and I am going through this right now. This video was definitely helpful and I am currently seeking counseling. Thank you for posting.
So glad you enjoyed it!
First 6 months is the hardest by far....
2 of the biggest things that have kept me afloat are meditation and exercising. Meditation helps keep my stress levels down and helps me keep a cool head through all the craziness going around. Exercising has become a lot harder to do mainly because of time. The few weeks after my daughter was born I would actually do pushups and other basic exercises at work. I had to wait until she got her vaccines but she's now old enough for the day care at the gym so no excuses!
Great feedback, thank you. Keep up the good work!
I had no clue this was a thing, and I am battling it. Thank you for posting this video.
wish i had discovered this channel sooner. extremely rare for me to comment on videos but this video and channel is simply incredlible. Bless
love to all the dads out there ❤
Thank you for this video. It was very helpful. I think adding exercise to the list is a must. While it is hard to get up and out for a workout (especially when feeling down), it NEVER HURTS and usually helps clear some of the negative fog. Swimming and surfing are the most potent for me.
I never knew about this… and everything is making sense, but I’m pulling through and mentally in a better spot now. Now that I know what to look for I appreciate this video
Great Topic. I am going through this at the moment. I am hoping to put these tools into action. Extremely hard when you are dealing with other life stresses etc. Thanks Jason for the support.
Yes it is hard. Understand you are not alone as it's very common. That doesn't make it easy but I'm confident you can come out on top. Keep your head up 😉
postpartummen.com/
@@sunshineandrain6971 thank you
Just recently found this channel, and as of the many dads going through anxiety/depression; it's a struggle. my 2 month old isn't that bad, but when he struggles to sleep or relax I get upset that he's that way; then I feel worse for feeling that way. It seems like it's unreasonable to feel this way, so watching that i'm certainly not alone and it's a real thing. it helps, it really does. These videos are great; as much as i'd wish one video would all of a sudden make things better, I know it wont, hopefully it helps me work towards that goal. Seems to come and go, one minute i'll be more "ok" with it, the next i'll get that feeling in my gut and not know how to handle it.
You are on the right path. Give yourself a break and some self-acceptance. It happens, it just can take some time. Practice makes perfect (or at least good enough :)
Totally understand your experience Chris. I have struggled with the same thing with our 2 month old. So many raw feelings/lows and hard to sift through it all and not take it personal. I feel ya
Thank you.
It's awesome that you're watching videos like this! It's gonna help you be a better father!
My son is 5 days old and I’m going through this, it’s not easy... sleep deprivation was the major trigger I believe
For more information and support check out postpartummen.com/postpartum-depression/
Same bro
4 days old for me and I’m already going through. I have major history so researching PPD is my 1st priority to help my wife, daughter and bonus-son thrive. You got this brother
My wife was cured of postpartum depression. My wife Maya was a 32-year-old fit, vibrant lawyer. we been married for more than five years and was expecting our first child, a baby boy. She had a history of depression and generalised anxiety disorder. She was doing well with a combination of medication and cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) for many years. Maya had decided in the months leading up to getting pregnant that she wanted to be off medication and worked with her psychiatrist to carefully get off medication. She continued weekly therapy. She was mostly active, upbeat and cheerful during her pregnancy. She gave birth to a healthy 7.3-pound baby boy. After the delivery, she started to feel sad, overwhelmed and consistently tearful. She frequently felt irritable and on edge. This feeling persisted for the first 10 weeks after the baby was born. My wife felt utterly incapable of soothing our baby and get frustrated and tearful. She was so afraid of what she had learned about sudden infant death (SIDS), that she would barely allow herself to sleep. She felt that it was a constant race against the clock-with nursing, pumping and changing. She was always cleaning bottles and diapers. She felt horrified with how she looked. She had expected to wear pre-pregnancy clothes immediately after childbirth. She hadn't had a meal in peace or gotten her hair or nails done and couldn't even think about having sex. My wife’s psychiatrist said she could't control Maya's mental state. They talked about a variety of tools, including CBT, incorporating 15-20 minutes of daily relaxation, mindfulness skills, hiring help, getting her Mom to stay with her for a few weeks and other support. I understood the urgency of the situation and offered to take time off work and to do some of the overnight feedings. Nor of this could work as she get more worried. She always feel tearful and felt she was a "failure as a Mom." our baby cry incessantly and she could barely get sleep. Our baby also had high level of bilirubin and had a bit of neonatal jaundice and she blamed herself for it. After being monitored in the NICU, he was sent home. postpartum depression got my wife frustrated until we got to do some search is there could be a permanent way to cure it and found a testimony of a lady cured by Dr odia, After being monitored in the NICU, We decide to contact the Herbalist for a cure. All our pains and sorrows turn to joy and history from the day we came in contact with Dr Odia, Who really help with his herbal herbs, I WAS TOLD HE IS A HERBALS AND HE CAN BE OF HELP, We gave him a try and it really worked for my wife, if anyone having same issue you can reach him via: ( Dr Odia Herbalist Home) on Facebook or via( drodiaherbalistcenter@gmail.com) He will help get your heart desire granted.
I have a 20-month boy and a 5-month baby girl and my wife and I both feel suffocated. Hard to do coursework or focus. Finances and sleep deprivation are probably the biggest factors, but I also just feel unfulfilled as a person.
Don’t know if I can get a therapist right now, but I could definitely do more meditation and the like.
Why can't you get a therapist?
@@DadUniversity might be too expensive, we’ll see if my parents can cover it
Insurance or look for local community resources
My twin boys are 4 months old... I love my sons very much, but my wife and her emotional roller coaster constantly puts me down...... Every day existence is just pain for me...
That is hard. Try this video: th-cam.com/video/i7ZEUfIHRa0/w-d-xo.html. Your wife is probably also going through her own stuff
Thank you so much for this video, just a few weeks ago my baby was born happiest day of my life. At the hospital they spent an hour educating my girlfriend about ppd no one even once said anything about dad. Guess what? My girlfriend is jolly and flying like a butterfly but out of nowhere this huge depression cane on me and kicked me I got so confused. Feelings of anger and irritation, I disconnected from the world no contact with anyone all my friends telling me congrats on text haven’t replied to a single one in weeks. Feel like crying all the time and had a nervous breakdown few days ago.
This video really helped me I am starting to take steps to get better thanks
Hang in there. Being a father is a roller coaster, but one we would keep getting in line for. It isn't always easy but you will make it through. Keep your head up and try to practice gratitude. I have to tell myself that all the time :)
You are so right. At the hospital and at doctor appointments education about postpartum should be given to BOTH the mother AND the father. postpartummen.com/
Please stop posting to advertise
@@DadUniversity I meant no disrespect in sharing more ways to get help. I recently came across the website and thought I would share it because it is another way for those who are struggling to get help.
I don't know if I have this but I am a first time dad and my son was born almost two months ago. I'll have moments where I feel really sad and I don't know why. Sometimes this happens and I don't want to be around my son because of it. Then it goes away and I'm fine. It comes in waves. I still like doing things I used to enjoy. I exercise and eat a low carb diet. My wife said shes been feeling depressed on and off herself. I hope it goes away.
I have all these (Except I don't smoke and drink). The worst part is my wife is going through PPD so I have to suck it up. I feel inadequate and most of the time I feel like just better off dead because I make so many mistakes and I can't seem to do things right.
Please understand we all make mistakes. I have made a ton and still do constantly. It's part of the learning process. Instead of thinking that you are failing, understand you are learning. We all feel inadequate. However the awesome part is that you are not at all. You are normal. You are a new parent learning how to deal with all of this new stuff. Your children need you. If you are really having bad thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline @ 800-273-8255. It does get better.
@@DadUniversity Thank you. I just have no output for this for now. I hope It gets better.
My kid is 18 months and it just hit me. Trying to be strong but it's been tough
I've been struggling with this for 3 years with my son. He's 3. I feel so disconnected from him.
I was depressed b4 being a dad. I love my son but the work load causes serious burnout for me. Not to mention the anxiety about his health. Its gnarly, and there is NO info. out there......
We just released a video on dad depression today. Maybe that would help. We also have a video called "Being a dad is hard".
@Little Wizard,I'm going through the same thing.How did you get over it before u became a Dad?My wife wants a child but I'm having anxiety and she is an amazing person.
@@musicgrynd too be quite honest your kid can also have an opposite effect...in that the pure joy kinda cancels out everything else....timing too, not a time to get off meds.....it is our birth rite to produce/or not...in terms of diapers, balancing work ect. plan,plan and more planning all the way down to the socks your gonna wear the next day...
Thank you so much 🙏🏾
Thanks mate. Watching this from the UK. Just had a new born who I adore but keep getting thoughts about what happens to her when I’m gone. Hoping it’s a transitional period for me. But I’m prepared to get professional help. Thanks again.
I am going through this..
Thank you..
Thanks big help brother!
Thank you soo much! This helped.
Thank you so much
It's awesome that you're watching videos like this! It's gonna help you be a better father!
thx for this. my first child has been home a week and ya. i’m having a real hard time :(
I stopped asking for help years ago. At this point it just seems pointless
I hope you are doing well man.
In my case to take that step of looking for support was the hardest part and also the look in the eyes of your partner was tough to take in when you tried to make her understand your feelings. She will have that look on her face she is the one who is pregnant and carried our child for almost a 8 month and I felt like stupid and I was not a man. I couldn't understand what I was going through. I was smoking cigarettes a lot about a pkt of 30's ciggy a day. Working at 2 jobs and only 4 hrs of sleep and sometimes less sleep than that. I was angry all the time and the good thing about me was everytime i had arguments with my x, i was never aggressive to her, all i did I would walkout of the house and go for a long walk n the air in the house was unbreathable . I knew my relationship with my x partner was already messed up and there was no turning back n I couldn't do anything about it. The thing is some woman thinks that only woman can go through post-partum. The hardship I been through was a torture. My advice to all the young father's that are going through this please seek help and talk or one day you will wake up and realised it's too late and lost everything
Thank you for sharing your story and advice. Glad to have you as part of the community.
@@DadUniversity no worries mate. Good to know to have community like yours around to help others. Keep it up👍
I am about to lose my mind. Nobody told me the changes after the newborn.
Yes it can be hard but understand it is totally normal.
What a great video. Im about to try meditating and get a little into the spiritual World. Anybody else does this?
I do it every morning! Try using the insight timer app or TH-cam and find guided meditations
@@DadUniversity how long every morning?
@@SkovStudios anywhere from 5 to 12 minutes usually. If you have more time, great....but I find right around 10 minutes is best for me.
But do you do when you think your husband has postpartum depression, but he doesn't want to go to the doctor or get any help... He doesn't bound or feel anything about our baby. Like if he wasn't the dad. He desire have a big family always, and now he feels like a failure.
I can understand it can be frustrating if someone doesn't want help. All you can do is communicate to them that you are here for them and will help them any way they need.
I dont if this is what I am experiencing, or not. But I feel down, hopeless, neglected, i feel like i only exist to provide money, i feel like my wife is completely ignoring me, and does not care about me.
Tell your wife you would like to sit down and talk, and calmly tell her how you are feeling. That is the only way it could get better. Just be honest and stay strong.
thank you
Why do we feel this way?
All different reasons. Anxiety is worrying about the future and depression is typically being upset about the past. We often do both and changes in our lives can really take us for a spin. The key is to realize you are totally normal for feeling this way and there is a way out. It can be better.
Dad University thanks for the clarification! I feel like I’m more scared or worried than I let on and it’s causing issues with my partner and I. I want to be strong for her but this is my first kid and her second so I’m not sure how to handle the stress
Who said you have to be "strong"? You can be supportive of her and still have anxiety for yourself. But remember everyone feels it. Give yourself permission to feel and it often reduces it's power. Don't hold it in. Sometimes focusing on our partner allows us to worry less about ourselves. You will be awesome
Going thru this now.
Thanks man
I'm a man of duty and mind over matter not emotion, I doubt it will happen to me but watching this just in case, baby will be due in October. Really looking forward to it but I'm so tried from taking care of my wife still I wouldn't trade any of this for the world.
I feel being left out..
What do you think is causing you to feel that way?
What do ya do when your wife shits on every effort you make as a father? Im deffo depressed but there is no way out of it.
Tonight my girl was crying non stop and she would only stop crying if i kept lifting her up and down. Wife couldnt stop her either just when i lifted her up and down which i was struggling to do as my arms were giving out.
Then my wife tells me to stop doing it. Some nonsense about her not liking the way her head was shaking.
I felt like going out and drowning myself in the river.
Watch my other videos on not allowing other people to determine how you feel. You get to decide. Nobody can make you feel, we get to choose how we feel.
NICU baby at that!
Poor men😢
What happens when you've done every single thing in this video and none of it has helped
I'm sorry you are going through this. Have you met with a professional or therapist?
Don't listen to other "dad's" advice. Go see a real therapist who has a specialized education just for this.
My husband isn’t bonding with our second child he works a lot . He’s expressed this more than once . As a mom this hurts so bad he says he loves her but I’m afraid of favoritism being a thing . He also wants more children but with this situation I don’t think we should have more of he feels like this .
Has he been examined for PPD? I had PPD when my daughter was born and did not feel bonded to her until she was about 3 or 4 months. I loved her but I didn't feel "in love." After speaking with my doctor I realized that I had PPD and when I started to feel better that "starry-eyed" feeling really kicked in and now I see my girl as the best thing to ever come into my life :).
Nice try! But the thigs you say to cut out of life like alcohol, junk food, screen time etc. are "vices" Vices are necessary to keep a struggling individual from going over the edge.. so to speak. It is very easy for a happy "put together" person to say "Oh just dump all ur bad habits and everything will be fine. " Real life is not like that! Real people have vices which help them navigate everyday life. Over 70% of adults drink alcohol, or at least tried it. That's so they can try to enjoy life and blur away all the negative experiences.
I came here looking for advice on depression because I'm about to be a father. My depression comes from knowing that when the baby is born, I will loose my entire identity and all my time and money! And what will I get in return? ? ? hugs after work???? Not a fair trade PLEASE HELP!!
Being a father isn't about receiving anything. It is about serving and loving that baby. It's very draining, yes, but also very rewarding.
Bruhhhh what 🤯🤯🤯
Lack of sleep, financial stress and relationship stress are situational stressors after a baby, that’s not postpartum... it’s not a hormonal or physiological change caused by baby now being outside of body.
What a strange pedantic hill to die on.
Whether you agree with it being classed as a form of "postpartum" or not is wholly irrelevent to the topic at hand.
🤏
My baby is only 8 weeks and I am going through this right now. This video was definitely helpful and I am currently seeking counseling. Thank you for posting.
postpartummen.com/postpartum-depression/
Thank you