All In Aftermath: Did It Work? Before/After Physique, Hormones, Body Image, Loneliness

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  • @StephanieButtermore
    @StephanieButtermore  5 ปีที่แล้ว +5402

    Thank you for sticking with me during the most difficult part of this journey. I wouldn't be able to do it without you and wish you knew how much you mean to me. I love you so much. 🙏

    • @-amosc.presley-7192
      @-amosc.presley-7192 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @Stephanie Buttermore _Thanks, for your comment. It really had encouraged me a whole lot.

    • @YasminA-jm9zs
      @YasminA-jm9zs 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      You said you’d stop working out every day but on IG you’ve been working out every day. Can you gives us an update on that?

    • @marvilus
      @marvilus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      You really are the sweetest. You just keep Loving you (and Jeff lol). Regardless.

    • @pwnsensei
      @pwnsensei 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Thank you for updating us with all this interesting information!

    • @naomii494
      @naomii494 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Stephanie Buttermore I love your lip piercing were do you buy yours from is there a website or a link you could get it from?

  • @irishbosschick
    @irishbosschick 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5776

    In 4 months, your body acceptance role modeling has done more for my eating disordered brain than 12 years of therapy.

    • @Pommes5023
      @Pommes5023 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Mood

    • @TheKakkalakka
      @TheKakkalakka 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Wow good for you

    • @montana6098
      @montana6098 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      same for me as well!

    • @luisa9er
      @luisa9er 5 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      irishbosschick that‘s such a wonderful thing to hear that you‘re on a good way! Keep fighting, trust me it‘s worth it

    • @brittanyswansboro3741
      @brittanyswansboro3741 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Same! Thank you for your bravery and honesty, Stephanie!

  • @emilyboekhoff2376
    @emilyboekhoff2376 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3059

    It’s so refreshing to see someone finally choose to make a change so they feel better instead of everyone always trying to lose weight.

    • @wisemage0
      @wisemage0 5 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      @Lady Wander and apparently she's stronger now, too. Really highlights the absurdity of prioritizing appearance over comfort and strength.

    • @raddgreat01
      @raddgreat01 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      She regret it by now lol

    • @nettyspeaks
      @nettyspeaks 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lose*

    • @bimbowithadegree420
      @bimbowithadegree420 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Its good to see people showing that feeling better does not necessarily mean just weight loss. Being super lean as a woman, its just unsustainable. I wished an influencer had done what she's doing now back when i started my fitness journey, because all i got from trying to look super lean, was an eating disorder

    • @paolapai
      @paolapai 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@bimbowithadegree420 then you just wanted to be skinny, not lean with muscles. I actually had to stop trying to build muscles because the huge amount of food I had to eat to mantain my muscles was unbearable.

  • @stayhappylittlemermaid
    @stayhappylittlemermaid 5 ปีที่แล้ว +553

    He who has health, has hope and he who has hope, has everything.
    ✨✨

    • @ReeseCup45
      @ReeseCup45 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      stayhappylittle mermaid your comment made me cry, you brought me back to earth. I didn’t know I needed to see this, thank you.

    • @clareluo7447
      @clareluo7447 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      LAW OF SYLLOGISM

    • @stayhappylittlemermaid
      @stayhappylittlemermaid 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@ReeseCup45 that really god to hear💪take care

    • @kristinishere1616
      @kristinishere1616 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      i wouldn't call gaining 35lbs for no reason healthy. it's not like she had amenorrhea as an excuse, she just wanted to stuff herself with food after starving herself

    • @jessicabenjamin9426
      @jessicabenjamin9426 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kristinishere1616 you're disgusting for saying that. You clearly don't understand why she started this journey to begin with

  • @melissapiontek3886
    @melissapiontek3886 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2939

    I fee like Steph is paving a way for women back to truly healthy bodies and body image , profoundly impressed by this whole ordeal!

    • @thebigo3752
      @thebigo3752 5 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      That doesn't mean go out and binge eat everything you see and gain 40 pounds that shit ain't healthy

    • @bailey2624
      @bailey2624 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      just eat right problem solved go carnivore

    • @cuntpaggot9962
      @cuntpaggot9962 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      no one is paving anything for anyone.. lol.. just another marketing thing... wait till a video about some new DIET PLAN comes out from her..... or how she's not happy because of internet.. lol.. whatever.... good luck have fun...

    • @Nick-lc5hk
      @Nick-lc5hk 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      gaining 50 lbs in 2 months is not healthy and neither is her current body.

    • @katiehuynh03
      @katiehuynh03 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Nick Giandonato I’ve only watched a couple of her videos about this but this is not her end goal.

  • @nora02173
    @nora02173 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2607

    I only get more and more convinced that you're an absolutely incredible person

    • @sadieadler4383
      @sadieadler4383 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I've met her in person and she was so nice to me.

  • @danalivingabroad
    @danalivingabroad 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3644

    For some reason, moms can be the most critical of their daughters
    bodies.

    • @JulieAziza
      @JulieAziza 5 ปีที่แล้ว +320

      Dana Balsley perhaps it’s because most people tend to project their own insecurities and/or self-criticisms onto others.

    • @morecakesmorelays3270
      @morecakesmorelays3270 5 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      Because they care about their daughters attracting a mate duh so they are right

    • @fetterkater7484
      @fetterkater7484 5 ปีที่แล้ว +273

      @@morecakesmorelays3270 no, they are not right. And parents usually don't criticise their sons like that and they should also look good to attract a mate, shouldn't they?

    • @morecakesmorelays3270
      @morecakesmorelays3270 5 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      @@fetterkater7484 I wish my mom explained to me that I was fat and that I was eating too much as a child. Because dealing with hurt feelings is better than dealing with obesity. I lost alot of weight after many years and struggled alot. I believe sometimes parents should do what's best for their kids even if it's not "nice".

    • @williambrown7437
      @williambrown7437 5 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      fetter Kater I completely disagree with this. I’ve always been fit and if I gain or lose any weight everyone in my family makes a comment about me getting too skinny or getting too fat. My mom and siblings never mentions my sisters weight. Families are all different but I promise you a lot of men are critiqued about their appearance as much as women are. The length of my hair, and facial hair and weight are always open for critique in my family.

  • @cjripley32
    @cjripley32 4 ปีที่แล้ว +265

    This is honestly so different from what the rest of the culture is feeding us, the fact that she's literally doing this for her own health as opposed to eating to look a certain way. She's absolutely glowing, I'm stunned, this is so inspiring

  • @ploy5121
    @ploy5121 5 ปีที่แล้ว +578

    Just dropped everything to watch this

  • @jenligi9495
    @jenligi9495 5 ปีที่แล้ว +473

    That clip of you being hurt from your mom's comment broke my friggen heart, I felt that! and for you to walk away and understand that she's not in the right state of mind showed how strong and mature you are. For the record, you were beautiful smaller and you are just as beautiful now ❤

  • @dancearound009
    @dancearound009 5 ปีที่แล้ว +583

    Never have I wanted to jump through the screen more than now and give someone the biggest hug!

  • @graciehorton5874
    @graciehorton5874 5 ปีที่แล้ว +578

    I’ve struggled with an eating disorder for 12 years. I’ve been hospitalized on and off. Your past 4 months have helped me mentally and emotionally more than any therapist or hospital has.

    • @Pingucado
      @Pingucado 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      isn't that the exact same as the top comment, just worded differently?

    • @graciehorton5874
      @graciehorton5874 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      kaddaaaaaaaaaaaaa I don’t know, I was just sharing my opinion/experience.

    • @lauraestes9304
      @lauraestes9304 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I was anorexic as a child. We do feel better when lean. There's a reason we want to be lean. So after trying it all I found the raw vegan lifestyle. I tried all the forms of this lifestyle as well. Check out the Medical Mediums channel. He's brilliant. My diet now has been mostly raw salads I mean huge salads ! I've done this for 20 years and I'm 53 and in the best shape of my life. Ficus on eating greens because when you are hungry you need minerals. Everyone is mineral deficient in this modern world. A carrot today has 40 times less mineral content than it had when your grandparents were born. So we keep feeling hungry because the food hasn't got any minerals. The way around this is to get a juicer and juice the veggies and eat a lot of them !!! As you repair the mineral deficiency your hunger goes away !!!! I dare anyone to try this and then tell me they regret it.

  • @summer-re7zu
    @summer-re7zu 5 ปีที่แล้ว +393

    I feel you so much that the criticism from close family is the hardest..

    • @nickylovespie
      @nickylovespie 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      it's hard because they're the ones who are supposed to love you unconditionally... but then you hear that criticism.

    • @regan9855
      @regan9855 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      My mom tried to hug me today,but she stepped back as soon as she touched me saying 'ewww that's a skeleton'...

  • @annebaldwin9708
    @annebaldwin9708 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1607

    Stephanie, I’m only 13 so I might not have all the wisdom and experience in the world as others older than me, but I’ve seen all the incredibly uplifting messages you’ve been getting and they are all exactly what you deserve! I may just be restating things people have said but I just couldn’t help it, you are such an inspiration and your personality is one that truly shines. Thank you so much for just being who you are and sharing that with us, keep going, you truly are unstoppable!!!

    • @stani.k
      @stani.k 5 ปีที่แล้ว +200

      For your age , the way you speak is so mature and sweet! Keep being a kind individual ☺️☺️

    • @StephanieButtermore
      @StephanieButtermore  5 ปีที่แล้ว +194

      Thank you so much! This was such a sweet comment and you sound so much older than 13!!!! I appreciate you so much 🙏♥️

    • @marcelaljavo6016
      @marcelaljavo6016 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I'm recently 13, too 😊😊 what's up 👋🏻👋🏻

    • @vliciouss
      @vliciouss 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      You have more wisdom than you think ! 💕💕

    • @an.gie.gie0811
      @an.gie.gie0811 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Anne Baldwin what you said is so mature and wise. You’re a great person :)

  • @allisonheaslet3806
    @allisonheaslet3806 5 ปีที่แล้ว +430

    literally almost started crying when she was crying, I wish I could reach through the screen and give you the biggest hug. THANK YOU for documenting your journey- it means more than you know!

    • @allisonheaslet3806
      @allisonheaslet3806 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Leroy Brown hell yes. Im a crier. I also pretty much cried during that Budweiser puppy and horse commercial

    • @Hallowench
      @Hallowench 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same.

  • @mmonroe259
    @mmonroe259 5 ปีที่แล้ว +512

    Love that you actually mention and showed that you have stretch marks and spider veins, which so many women do as well! ...I feel like so many fitness gurus pretend their bodies are perfect and that gaining or losing weight and or muscle doesn’t affect their body! Thanks for keeping it real!

  • @florence6531
    @florence6531 5 ปีที่แล้ว +502

    Cried a little watching this. Honestly feels like you’re not alone when you realise how people go through so much behind the scenes when they’re not showing their happy go lucky side. I understand what it’s like to have people see you as this bright and cheerful person who lifts up spirits but you’re also doing it to help lift up your own. As well as this ‘all in’ journey you’re also sharing another vulnerable side to you showing you’re human and you face things that everyone faces and I completely respect that. I love your ‘all in’ videos but I also love to see a real person sharing real life. Thank you x

    • @lemoncalippo1554
      @lemoncalippo1554 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Flo Kilb me too

    • @sweetangiegirl1
      @sweetangiegirl1 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      This is such a sweet, compassionate message. Very classy!

  • @Katecchace
    @Katecchace 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4962

    I just want to say I was borderline anorexic before you started your journey and really close to hospitalization and now I’ve been following on your footsteps and going all in and I’ve gained 21 pounds and my body image is horrible but I know that it’s just a part of the process and you are my only role model who sheds light on the importance of going all in so Thankyou and please keep updating on your journey ♥️♥️♥️♥️

    • @ObeyKhadija
      @ObeyKhadija 5 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      katie Castillo good for you girl keep going!!

    • @eglemorkunaite3088
      @eglemorkunaite3088 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Very proud of you ❤️❤️

    • @Katecchace
      @Katecchace 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Thalia Rice wow I love that we can find a good community of people here on this platform and yea I completely get where you’re coming from 💛

    • @Katecchace
      @Katecchace 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Eglė Morkūnaitė thankyou

    • @Katecchace
      @Katecchace 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ObeyKhadija Thankyou so much 💛

  • @danikamilesi6699
    @danikamilesi6699 5 ปีที่แล้ว +381

    at the beginning I thought you were like the "other fitness women" . But since you started your new journey All IN, I saw the real you. And the way you take care of your mother, damn it's so heartbreaking. I understand what you are going through.. and I can honestly say that I admire you. Send you a big hugh 😘

  • @CorinaHall
    @CorinaHall 5 ปีที่แล้ว +909

    I love how your face has filled out during the process. You really do look healthier and happier.

    • @TeacherToolkitDemo
      @TeacherToolkitDemo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      The fuck planet are you women from 😂

    • @MsJanetWood
      @MsJanetWood 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Yes, her face does look prettier.

    • @msgirly6827
      @msgirly6827 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      @@TeacherToolkitDemo what type of planet are men like you from? What was so mind blowingly weird to you about what she said that you had to comment this?

    • @TeacherToolkitDemo
      @TeacherToolkitDemo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@msgirly6827 jesus christ she even has bloodwork up at 7 minutes. Literally just saw this. Fucking hilarious. Unless you are using exogenous substances your hormones dont go fucking wild like this. I've known loads of "fitness competitors" go batshit crazy when they quit and this is why. The lies in the "fitness industry" literally disgust me.

    • @fomalhauto
      @fomalhauto 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@TeacherToolkitDemo
      you come off like a real jerk

  • @madeleineharrower6698
    @madeleineharrower6698 5 ปีที่แล้ว +709

    I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you documenting your journey. I didn’t realise I needed this, but holy shit! You have done what most people are too scared to do. So Thx so much xx

  • @YaBoIcHRi5
    @YaBoIcHRi5 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1206

    Mom told me i was too fat
    Went to gym
    Mom told me i was to skinny
    I bulked up
    Mom told me i am too big.
    😓😓😓
    I am a guy and i support your journey and you are looking beautiful everytime! Jeff is a lucky man!

    • @carnationcorsages
      @carnationcorsages 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      PreTTyBoYcHRi5* too big ? No way

    • @lucdemanmukenge6562
      @lucdemanmukenge6562 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@carnationcorsages my mom says the same but l am skinny af lol, mothers and their way of seeing muscle lol

    • @MygirlsGJPB
      @MygirlsGJPB 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Just say- thats nice, Mom and live your life.

    • @megk317
      @megk317 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      PreTTyBoYcHRi5* relatable

    • @msammy21
      @msammy21 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I can relate to this way too much haha

  • @03Ryen
    @03Ryen 5 ปีที่แล้ว +321

    I can see that you've been terrified, depressed, and broken throughout this journey. I can also tell that the reason why you felt as much is because you are honest about your content. That is such a brave thing to do. You are not fearless, no. You had fears and yet you marched on. That is genuinely something most of us could not do.
    I cannot begin to imagine diving into psychological torture and bare it all at the same time. You are not the first to do "all in" but you bring light to it so others may follow. You are crazy as most great scientists are. When we get there, to the end of this trail, I pray that we find what we are looking for. The physiological and psychological peace that we need right now.
    Thank you, Stephanie.

  • @stamatinaspyratou7517
    @stamatinaspyratou7517 5 ปีที่แล้ว +311

    I was anorexic and I was hospitalized for a month in summer but now I’m inspired by your journey and I went all in the last 3 months I’ve gained 10 pounds and I could say I’m close to finally liking my body image, thank you for all this

    • @justperpetuallybothered3474
      @justperpetuallybothered3474 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Yay! That's wonderful, I hope you're still getting better!

    • @jadez682
      @jadez682 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Sending you love! Hope you're feeling better!

    • @sarah29880
      @sarah29880 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      💕💕💕👌🏻

    • @imamirrorballxo
      @imamirrorballxo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      💛💛

    • @SarahScofield94941
      @SarahScofield94941 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I hope you're feeling well 🙏🙏 lots of love 😇😊

  • @taylormiller2633
    @taylormiller2633 5 ปีที่แล้ว +363

    So inspiring, I love Stephanie because she’s not like other youtubers, she doesn’t flaunt her life, she doesn’t brag about how prefect she is, she is a real person like us and that’s awesome, it’s nothing to be ashamed of.

  • @borami22
    @borami22 5 ปีที่แล้ว +324

    I honestly think you’re face looks so much more beautiful with fuller cheeks. You’re absolutely gorgeous the way you are right now. You’ve always been. But it something that’s makes you glow more these days. I love it. You are amazing!

  • @surfergirl22330
    @surfergirl22330 5 ปีที่แล้ว +786

    Also when I gained a bunch of weight my best friend told me “you’re beautiful because you’re beautiful, not because you’re skinny... let’s go buy new clothes- excuse for a shopping spree”

  • @rosez4eva
    @rosez4eva 4 ปีที่แล้ว +163

    Women are treated similarly to men when it comes to training, exercising, dieting, etc. But women aren’t just smaller men, they have different needs. A lot of fitness TH-cam channels don’t directly address this so I’m really glad you are.

    • @are3287
      @are3287 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      All the same training, excercising and dieting facts apply to both men and women.

    • @hannahz2263
      @hannahz2263 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@are3287 they don't. just by looking at hormones and hormone cycles you should see that that statement is so not true

  • @amyvandrunenfitness9792
    @amyvandrunenfitness9792 5 ปีที่แล้ว +283

    So sorry that you’re experiencing any external negativity on your “all in” journey to health! I find you SO interesting and informative and I really look forward to your “all in” vlogs, thanks for sharing this journey!

  • @alessiataverna7753
    @alessiataverna7753 5 ปีที่แล้ว +230

    My mom is also really mentally ill.. so I totally resonated with you when you expressed your sadness :( thank you for being so open

    • @kristalanway8994
      @kristalanway8994 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      My mom also has mental ilness and i understand completely how you feel. Its always a struggle.

    • @alessiataverna7753
      @alessiataverna7753 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@kristalanway8994 sending lots of love your way💕

  • @norajamieson7257
    @norajamieson7257 5 ปีที่แล้ว +215

    The part when you were crying about your mom broke my heart. I went through this process a few years ago and the my dad would sometimes say things that would just hit me so hard. It hurts so badly when the people closest to you criticize you so harshly, but you have to remember just because you love them doesn't mean that their opinion is right. Stay strong, I love you so, so much 💕

    • @amystubby
      @amystubby 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I know. I have a somewhat similar dynamic with my mom and my therapist and I spend a ton of time breaking down how not to take her "editorials" on my appearance personally. It's tough.

    • @lanadavis5820
      @lanadavis5820 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thanks, I needed to hear this.

    • @norajamieson7257
      @norajamieson7257 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@lanadavis5820 I'm so happy that I could help ❤

  • @chelseyisner921
    @chelseyisner921 5 ปีที่แล้ว +191

    You look so much happier. You’re absolutely glowing

  • @elysefuller7274
    @elysefuller7274 5 ปีที่แล้ว +307

    Seeing Stephanie breakdown about being alone made me tear up. I’ve never related to something more.

  • @Megs125
    @Megs125 5 ปีที่แล้ว +995

    Quick let’s all fly to Florida and give this woman a hug!

  • @s.1469
    @s.1469 5 ปีที่แล้ว +284

    ive been on almost all extremes of eating disorders and diet trends. you are so relatable. i started crying. its not just the food, weight, aesthetics, and science. thank you for demonstrating your strength and self love!!
    i really needed to see this Stephanie. thank you.

  • @giedre8921
    @giedre8921 5 ปีที่แล้ว +128

    Im not a follower, dont know you. But this is just amazing. Real body.. skinny, thick or curvy. As long as you arent hungry.

  • @liarotnerner
    @liarotnerner 5 ปีที่แล้ว +678

    Omg when she talked about her mother's reaction I actually cried with her.

    • @avigailbc1
      @avigailbc1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      ליאת רוטנר גם אני

    • @lkiiig9245
      @lkiiig9245 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol grow the fuck up who cares

    • @lindseywelsh
      @lindseywelsh 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Me too!

    • @stefaneylenea
      @stefaneylenea 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Me too. That is my relationship with my toxic father.

    • @SpiderMetalHell
      @SpiderMetalHell 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Wow you want a prize or something

  • @vanessamullenix4482
    @vanessamullenix4482 5 ปีที่แล้ว +162

    That hit home for me when you talked about your mom. My mom has been mentally ill my whole life too. The struggle is real

  • @amitche7286
    @amitche7286 5 ปีที่แล้ว +85

    Your emotional response to the comments from your mother was so raw. I was crying with you and giving you a virtual hug. I love how honest and brave you are. Body image issues are hard for everyone but putting it all out there is such a transparent way of shining light on how prevalent it is.
    Watching you go all in has helped me be much more accepting of myself in my current state and also helps instill a mindset of health and happiness over weight and guilt. Much love and appreciation for your strength. Hugs from California.

  • @vophie
    @vophie 4 ปีที่แล้ว +82

    the HEATHLIEST transformation i have EVER SEEEN I LOVE YOU

  • @IrishRainbolt
    @IrishRainbolt 5 ปีที่แล้ว +133

    Steph is just like gorgeous all the time wth..

  • @michellebalsillie4325
    @michellebalsillie4325 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1023

    I just wanted to hug you so bad when you were talking about your mom....

  • @applecinnamon
    @applecinnamon 5 ปีที่แล้ว +185

    I’m so glad you addressed the whole “clothes” thing Stephanie. I also donated all the clothes that were too small for me post recovery to get rid of triggers and kind of “turn the page” by doing a concrete action. You’re an inspiring, amazing, smart brave woman. You should be so proud of yourself ❤️

    • @LilyRyab
      @LilyRyab 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That is so important! I finally started to do that. Keeping clothes around after gaining weight has been so discouraging and depressing, i just decided to get rid of the clothes that are taking up space and buy some clothes that would actually fit me and flatter my current body. And you realize that you actually don't look so bad when you wear clothes that actually fit you🙌

  • @pierinacallirgos434
    @pierinacallirgos434 5 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    In moments of anxiety, sadness, loneliness and doubts remember there are people (me included) that admire your work and how strong and disciplined you are. Keep on going, love you!

  • @Reeseskitty
    @Reeseskitty 5 ปีที่แล้ว +146

    I learned the term “honor your hunger” from watching your channel and it is so important. Thank you so much for sharing your journey. You are changing more lives than just your own. Thank you so much!

  • @allielink7947
    @allielink7947 5 ปีที่แล้ว +167

    Studies on starvation and eating disorders show that it takes (typically) at least one year for the body to fully regulate and reach homeostasis once you begin the refeeding or "all in" process. :) keep going!

    • @matthewmcnamara8159
      @matthewmcnamara8159 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      She's already obese, she's literally gonna be morbidly obese if she were to keep going. This makes no sense

    • @missano3856
      @missano3856 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@cadencegriffin5416 I agree with him and I'm about as lean as can be continuously maintained.

    • @cadencegriffin5416
      @cadencegriffin5416 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      miss ano you think she’s obese? at approximately 145 pounds? that’s literally in the normal bmi range for a woman of her height

    • @Hon56
      @Hon56 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@cadencegriffin5416 She have 40 % body fat it's obesity not normal for the body.

    • @sleepymaddy7659
      @sleepymaddy7659 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@Hon56 why the fuck can y'all not just shut up. You all have a private life. Try to do e v e r y t h i n g in your life perfect before you judge others. Is that so hard to just shut up?

  • @Nina-dp3gx
    @Nina-dp3gx 5 ปีที่แล้ว +98

    Even when we know our mothers have mental health challenges; their words can affect us. You are so normal. Thanks for sharing 🙏🏻

  • @pungiaan8885
    @pungiaan8885 5 ปีที่แล้ว +104

    I don't even know how to say this: I was absolutely touched by this video. I've liked your content before and I've always loved your personality. But I feel like in this video, you were 100% you. You showed yourself in weak moments, which requires braveness. I just want to hug you right now and say thank you for letting us take part of this journey! You are so strong (physically of course but also mentally), and I am absolutely stunned by how you are growing as a person.
    (Also, thank you so much for helping me with my ED-battle. Some day, I'll go all in, too!)
    Thank you so so much! ❤

  • @lesliebb8400
    @lesliebb8400 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    I usually get bored when I’ve been watching a new fitspo girl for a while, but never Stephanie. She’s the realest of them all and seems to genuinely love her TH-cam family. As long as you put out videos I’ll watch em til the day I die!

  • @alexandrasive
    @alexandrasive 5 ปีที่แล้ว +118

    this made me cry for so many reasons - i went all in three and a half years ago myself and haven't gone back since. i got my period back, i've stopped being cold and exhausted every moment of the day, my hair stopped falling out, my breath has stopped smelling weird all the time, and more recently i've started to really enjoy and love the way i look too! the last part has taken so long, and it's still shakey, but going all in is so worth it, and i'm so grateful to you for making this video. you're helping so many people to feel less alone in the struggle. just so grateful

    • @1985bjaycat
      @1985bjaycat 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Congratulations! That's wonderful to hear.

    • @alexandrasive
      @alexandrasive 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@1985bjaycat thank you so much !

    • @1985bjaycat
      @1985bjaycat 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@alexandrasive 🌼🌺🌻🌹🌷

    • @jadamccubbin4932
      @jadamccubbin4932 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@solarydays that's obvious, but it's not always easy for people. you probably haven't been in their position based on your ignorance, so don't judge them. it's rude.

  • @suelng33
    @suelng33 5 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    When I started my fitness journey 4 years ago, you were one of the fitness women I loved following. Throughout these 4 years my life has had major ups and downs. I started feeling like most of the women that I followed were so lean and I was trying to get to that image. As a mother-of-four I had to go to extremes to get the look that I thought I wanted. The look that you had in most of your videos. I literally went to the gym 6 days a week, twice a day 4 hours a day, had absolutely no carbs, counted my calories and was basically feeling great, up until I realized my life evolved around my image and the gym. I started other hobbies and went to the gym less and less. Within 6 months of inconsistent gym regiment, but still eating fairly healthy I basically gained 10 lbs and lost all my lean look. I was feeling really discouraged and I stopped following you and all the fitness women that I wanted to look like. I just wanted to live my life in moderation and be happy with my body. Currently I'm not happy with my body or myself. And that has a lot to do with what's going on with my life, but I happen to stumble on this video and was really surprised that you have been going through so much this year. Not trying to be ignorant, but when you watch these TH-camrs with their positive attitude and picture perfect images all the time, I can't help but envy what seems like a perfect life. I'm so glad that you decided to be real and honest with yourself and your viewers. Your humanity is very encouraging and I hope the rest of your journey in life goes well for you and your loved ones this coming up year.

  • @provo3000
    @provo3000 5 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    I’m so proud of you. You’re such an amazing figure for young women to look up to. Thank you for sharing your story and being completely vulnerable. The world seriously needs more people like you.

  • @shreyashivaprakash7852
    @shreyashivaprakash7852 5 ปีที่แล้ว +170

    I honestly feel so bad that women are criticized for their weight gain way more than men are!! I've hated myself for looking a certain way for almost all my life!! But guess what someone ... when a celebrity like you is posting honest videos like these it's refreshing and boosts the confidence of so many young girls!! Like after I started watching your 'all in' videos... I've started to honour my body, love it for keeping me alive and healthy! Now i don't starve myself to sleep in order to look a certain way! I've also started viewing my workouts differently...I no longer work out to become thin or reach a target weight,I just do it cause I love my body and wish to keep it healthy❤️ just so you know... You are an inspiration to SOOOOOO many young girls like me and you're not alone in this journey.. We're all with you!!!

    • @gerryjtierney
      @gerryjtierney 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Oh fuck off. Fat women, skinny women, curvy women, every damn shape of woman has a horde of men who love it. Men can only be one shape. You're not a victim.

    • @naomii494
      @naomii494 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      💛🙌🏼

    • @beepobeepo
      @beepobeepo 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@gerryjtierney well youre insecure aintcha

    • @gerryjtierney
      @gerryjtierney 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@beepobeepo No, the truth is not insecure

  • @ShelbyLentz
    @ShelbyLentz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +146

    When you talked in the beginning about how well you took criticism from strangers throughout this process, it made my heart sink. I just still can’t believe that there are random people who have absolutely nothing better to do than criticize you. Your bravery and transparency are so beyond amazing. Thank you for this 🙏🏻♥️ your health is better than anyone’s ignorant opinions. You are amazing!

    • @sadieadler4383
      @sadieadler4383 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      She needs to stand up for herself and tell these strangers off.

  • @octupy01
    @octupy01 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    because of your honesty and your quest for health and well-being, i actually take you a lot more seriously as a fitness trainer - six pack or not.

  • @Madeline-nt8gm
    @Madeline-nt8gm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +204

    Stephanie, your body is gorgeous okay. Don’t let your stupid body image voice inside of you. You gain weight in your life, then you loose it eventually; That’s just how life works. Your personality and how you are feeling is so much more important then keeping lean.

  • @semt9
    @semt9 5 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    The part about your mom really hit me. My sister is also mentally ill and requires care from family members. Sometimes she says and does things that hurt us and it's so hard to separate when it's the person or the illness sometimes. Just sending love

  • @Fridanm13
    @Fridanm13 5 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    You are so refreshing for the fitness community, i love how honest you are, It can be so stressful to live up to some fitness modelos.

  • @sammionne239
    @sammionne239 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Hey steph! I am a doctor in training and I want to thank you so so so much for putting yourself out there and being a role model for young girls around the world. YOUR JOURNEY is exactly what the world needs. I used to watch you frequently because I admired your pursuit of science through a PhD. But now? I watch every new video when it gets uploaded. Authentic, introspective, and full of personal experiences demonstrating the emotional highs and lows. Thank you. Let's put an end to disordered eating and help girls AND GUYS put health and life fulfilment first.

  • @taylormarzouca6478
    @taylormarzouca6478 5 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    Can’t describe how much you encourage me to not revert to unhealthy restrictive patterns. Love you girl, and thank you!!!

  • @brigittedonker1405
    @brigittedonker1405 5 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    You made me cry when you said you are feeling alone. And I understand that being with youre bf makes it so much easier. I don't know how I would do it without my husband. Youre a beautiful woman and so strong. Keep going and live youre life to the fullest. ❤

  • @averyhudson4590
    @averyhudson4590 5 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    Stephanie, you’re so transparent and real and it’s so refreshing to have someone like you in the TH-cam community. You are so so brave to go against the norm and prioritize your health in a society that only seems to support weight loss. What you do is amazing, especially being a role model for other women who look up to you. Thank you for doing what you do and stay strong during this journey ❤️

  • @L._._
    @L._._ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I have a mentally ill mother too. Mine is bipolar 1 with schizophrenic tendencies. When she is having manic episodes she says nasty hurtful things...And she is unmedicated and refuses all help. It's so hard. I struggle sometimes accepting this is the mom I get...wanting more from her she will never have to give. I felt your pain when you were crying ♥️ anyone reading this who can relate..you're not alone.

  • @riiiiin
    @riiiiin 5 ปีที่แล้ว +154

    Damn this girl shot herself like she in a research experiment. That's a doctor for you *clap clap clap*. Thank you for documenting and for making such a sensitive and personal issue open so the rest of us can also take strides towards our health: mental and physical.

    • @Egghead1199
      @Egghead1199 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      She kinda is one lol

  • @juliayap8356
    @juliayap8356 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Girl, I started tearing up when you were saying you felt lonely. You for sure felt it but you are not. You are doing something incredible, and what is even more amazing is how open and transparent about everything. You are incredible and helping so many people and firstly yourself. Continue with your head held high, you rock and I feel proud, even though I never met you

  • @tgbutz
    @tgbutz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +208

    I've been following Jeff for years, and introduced him to my daughter. From there, she found her way to you, and has been so interested and impressed with your story. Now I'm tuning in as well, in support of my daughter, but also thoroughly enjoying the story you continue to share. Thank you... and keep doing good things!

  • @searchingstuff
    @searchingstuff 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Ladies, (and men out there) this is a beautiful person. Facing your fears and risking the emotions of failure and judgement takes a lot of courage. She did something for herself, regardless of other's criticism. I'm glad for her, and hope other people take that lesson not just in your weight, but as you pursue your goals and dreams in life.

  • @christinamyers5750
    @christinamyers5750 5 ปีที่แล้ว +139

    Stephanie don’t worry about the haters!! They’re gonna hate no matter what you do! What’s important is YOUR health and happiness❤️❤️❤️ I support you all the way!!

  • @otu_na_naani
    @otu_na_naani 5 ปีที่แล้ว +152

    Took care of my mom for 15 years. She had alzheimers. It really took a toll on myself mentally and physically. I gained 50 pounds and ended up with HBP. She has since passed and I'm able to focus on myself. Lost 23 pounds and I feel alive and healthy. I wish you well💜

    • @angelrain7618
      @angelrain7618 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      C S Thank you for taking care of your mom! Respect! That was a priceless gift...know it takes so much out of one...Good luck with your health.🤗

    • @otu_na_naani
      @otu_na_naani 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@angelrain7618 Thank you, I knew she could only get the best care from family. Even though I have 2 older sisters I took it on by myself. I don't regret it, I would do it again for her.

    • @angelrain7618
      @angelrain7618 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      C S You're an Angel 😇 I Love My Mom like That Too...❤

  • @Bucknutty
    @Bucknutty 5 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Wow,
    So much respect for taking care of your mother
    So many people leave their family members behind,
    you are such a strong smart woman
    Truly inspiring

  • @kristinzimmerman3310
    @kristinzimmerman3310 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I've been starving myself until I'm so hungry that I binge eat for such a long time that I don't even know when it started, or that it wasnt normal. The idea of eating whenever I'm hungry is literally self love in physical form and I'm so happy you shared your journey. I wish I could better explain how much your videos mean to me. I'm gunna go eat a bowl of cereal, so thank you.

  • @mariacampos3777
    @mariacampos3777 5 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    Can I just say how proud I am of you! So glad to hear you say that you've changed the way you look at your body and I wish the fitness industry would understand this, you don't need to starve yourself in order to look a certain way. You are such an inspiration to me. Please dont forget why you started even when some days are harder than others ❤

  • @kschachel3763
    @kschachel3763 5 ปีที่แล้ว +39

    Watching her gain weight has made me feel more happy with my body and I highly appreciate that she was willing to do this and not try to work off her weight right away🙌❤️

  • @PrincessPris
    @PrincessPris 5 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    The part about your mom. ❤️
    You’re so real and strong!!!
    😢

  • @katievonderlippe3667
    @katievonderlippe3667 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Thank you for being such a positive influence. I am currently struggling with my own body image and seeing so many TH-camrs focusing on weight loss is so difficult to see. I don’t look like them. No matter how hard I try and no matter how much I workout, starve myself, or throw up I still feel like there is something wrong with the way I look. Seeing you go through this process is so uplifting and I honestly love you for sharing it with all of us❤️

  • @veegee9542
    @veegee9542 5 ปีที่แล้ว +58

    Keep loving yourself there’s only one of you and you’re being honest and genuine and true to you!

  • @laurenlewis6838
    @laurenlewis6838 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    My mom was the first person who ever commented on my body/weight. I was 9 years old and it was in a target changing room while I was trying on swimsuits. I'll never forget it. I think about it constantly. Negative comments from the people we care about most defiently hit us the hardest.

    • @KittenGoesGrr
      @KittenGoesGrr 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      lauren lewis can relate to this. I can still remember when I first found I had stretch marks on my arms and I asked my guardian why and she said “it’s because you’re getting bigger”. I reckon I was also like you 9 years old.
      And it still hits me every so often because she used to comment on how I looked all the time. She used to get me clothes that were two sizes bigger than what I needed because I was “getting bigger” aka fatter in her eyes. Every so often she still says stuff like that and I’m 21 now

    • @Mawkarn
      @Mawkarn 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hahahahahahahaha fatass

  • @tropicaldreams8951
    @tropicaldreams8951 5 ปีที่แล้ว +58

    My mom has manic depression, so I understand what you go through. I feel like I’ve been her caretaker for most of my life. I bless you and feel your pain and I know you love her very much and I know what your mom says hurt your feelings. But remember she didn’t mean it. I like your videos because you don’t sugar coat things and we see you
    In your natural and raw form of Stephanie. You are amazing and I want you to know that you have a heart of gold. That’s why people
    Like you, because you are genuine.

  • @ellieirene4388
    @ellieirene4388 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Your healthy weight gain is actually very inspiring for my healthy weight loss

  • @mariebose7120
    @mariebose7120 5 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    Stephanie you are such an amazing person with everything you are going through with your mom. Everything your going through is making you stronger & we are so lucky you chose to share this with us. Stay strong ❤️

  • @prva846
    @prva846 5 ปีที่แล้ว +111

    You seem like an incredible daughter and I think you look even more stunning with the weight gain!

  • @MirandaSinistra
    @MirandaSinistra 5 ปีที่แล้ว +88

    Moms can cut to the very heart of their kids without really meaning to. I'm glad you were able to push past it.

  • @annazhang2328
    @annazhang2328 5 ปีที่แล้ว +261

    Don't worry too much,my family is the same,I'm from a chinese family with chinese values regarding weight,my mom and dad always points out my weight gain and talk about it with rought words,it's just how they are,it hurts for sure,but remember,they still love us.Sis,I still hate that thought😂

    • @Алискинблог
      @Алискинблог 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      anzhkj :3 I am russian and my parents are the same😂
      I think they love us even more than those parents who dont notice change in their children. They care about us, they just worry that we will eat more and become obese if we don’t start controling ourselves.

    • @justmeee3130
      @justmeee3130 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@Алискинблог if your parents don't support you no matter what size you are you maybe need to reconsider your opinions about what loving your child really is.

    • @TeacherToolkitDemo
      @TeacherToolkitDemo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Because your parents care about your health and will tell you if you are turning into a fat bastard. You should thank them for their honesty.

    • @justmeee3130
      @justmeee3130 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@TeacherToolkitDemo but talking about it with 'rough' words as she said is not oke.. My parents motivate me to eat healthy and exercise but in a positive way and I am healthy. no rough words needed.

    • @TeacherToolkitDemo
      @TeacherToolkitDemo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@justmeee3130 some people don't listen to nicely nice crap all the time do they. Chinese people especially do not mince their words when it comes to bodyweight. Go outside Shanghai and Beijing and people will literally point at you across the street to tell you how fat you are lol.

  • @sandy3848
    @sandy3848 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    one of the strongest and most inspirational fitness youtubers out there. probably my favourite youtuber as a result. The vulnerability and strength she had to demonstrate to herself, but then to share it with the world is the most terrifying thing ever. The vulnerability, beauty, strength, persistence and self-love that she shows exceeds anything I've ever seen in half these flakey fitness 'gurus' out there. Stephanie I have no more words for you, you beautiful soul.

  • @madisonstevens3825
    @madisonstevens3825 5 ปีที่แล้ว +39

    You are such a light in my life Stephanie❤️ As I’ve recovered from an eating disorder I’ve still always felt I needed to look a certain way to be accepted by the public eye, and some of my family. You’ve taught me how important it is to love myself first and to accept my body for what it is! I get so emotional watching your videos because I see the amazing person you are and how strong you are to do what is best for your body and health. Thank you thank you for teaching me all of this and for continuing to help me in my life❤️ Xoxo

  • @kaminaft9572
    @kaminaft9572 5 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    Having a parent who is mentally ill can make you feel so alone in this world. You feel like one person who is there since forever is making you drift apart from yourself. You inspire me so much. And I love you honesty and scientific way of explaining what you experience. Thank you so much! You make me feel like I am able to do anything in life.

  • @samantha.sanchez5403
    @samantha.sanchez5403 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    As a former dancer who has struggled to adapt to my new body, watching your journey has helped me feel less alone and more beautiful. Thank you for sharing :)

  • @karlyking8942
    @karlyking8942 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    You brought tears to my eyes with the clips of feeling and being alone, I just wanted to give you a hug!!! I've been watching you for some time and even though we are on separate journeys as I am trying to fight my battle of my relationship with food, it is so refreshing to see these videos!! So real and I know that you will be successful and I wish you nothing but the best in this journey!🙏

  • @studyowl2737
    @studyowl2737 5 ปีที่แล้ว +130

    Whenever you feel like you're alone just remember that you're helping people like me who are recovering from an eating disorder! I started my recovery because of you and its because of you that I've been able to continue on with this journey and change my entire life!

  • @griseldahuerta2964
    @griseldahuerta2964 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    She is queen of the fitness community 👑!!! Her resilience and attitude truly depict a more realistic side to fitness and health that is most often not seen on social platforms. Love love love!!!

  • @كوثررر
    @كوثررر 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    i’m so happy you’ve braved the internet and have shared all of this with us. you’re just an incredible person. and i appreciate you being such an amazing role model. i wish i could give you a hug every time you feel alone or when your mother is struggling. i know exactly what thats like except in my case, it’s my sister. i love you so much steph 🧡 we will always be here for ya!

  • @hannahmaryammidham336
    @hannahmaryammidham336 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    You have no idea how much everything you’re doing and showing is helping me with my lifestyle and perspective of food😭 supporting you through this and hoping you stay healthy and happy always!!❤️

  • @maann89
    @maann89 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    So glad you opened up about your mum, you’re an amazing daughter and your weight gain is amazing and has been amazing for your health!

  • @Not.Rebecca333
    @Not.Rebecca333 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Your dedication to living a healthier life, and in your case heathy meaning being heavier, is so inspiring. This journey is amazing, thank you for sharing it!

  • @CW-ri1ug
    @CW-ri1ug 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I felt your hurt when your mom commented on your body. My mom does it too, and I’ve endured worse from other people, but coming from her, it cut deep. I’ve never had an eating disorder, an am naturally lean. But her comment of me “starving myself” really hurt.

  • @jennybang7852
    @jennybang7852 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Stephanie
    You’re so brave for being so public about this whole process. Recovery is so scary, but your videos have encouraged me and made me feel less alone in my recovery too so thank you so much for sharing 😭❤️

  • @heidiwan812
    @heidiwan812 5 ปีที่แล้ว +66

    While many of us are trying to hide the side that we feel insecure/vulnerable, you took the courage to share that with all of us. I hope that every positive comment here could give you a little boost :)

  • @chantalk9796
    @chantalk9796 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    My heart broke when you were sad!!!!! 😭😭💔💔 I wanna send you allll the love girl, you're amazing and have taught me so much!!!!!

  • @Susan-yn3uq
    @Susan-yn3uq 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I know it’s never easy hearing people’s opinion on your physical appearance. I’ve put 20 lbs on because my estradiol is low - no period for 18 months. I’ve been in tears some days and other days feel strong and healthy. I have no support- my parents are deceased and brother is in the other side of the country. My heart goes out to you and I hope I can be as strong as you are.

  • @rileythewizard
    @rileythewizard 5 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    I’m a transfer student in college and in a long distance relationship, so your clip about feeling alone really struck a chord with me. Thank you for sharing