Honest Q&A: Do I Miss Being Shredded? All In Haters? Cheat Days? Digestion Issues?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 ก.ย. 2024
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⏰ Time Stamps ⏰
1. Do you miss your skinny body? Do you miss being shredded? 0:32
2. Would you ever do another fun Cheat Day video? 2:47
3. Do you ever feel like you need to binge? Like your body is still testing you? 4:19
4. Do you feel psychological (mental) hunger? 6:58
5. Why do you think men specifically had such a bad reaction to your “All In” journey? 9:08
6. How do you deal with the fact the fitness industry/society preferred you thinner? 11:38
7. Would you feel the same about your journey if your set weight landed higher? 13:41
8. If you had to do “All In” again, would you change anything? 16:54
9. Did you struggle with digestion issues? Or notice a change in digestion? 19:11
10. How has your mindset change towards the gym/lifting from pre-All In Steph? 21:42
11. Do you still have any “food rules” you have trouble letting go of? 26:09
12. What is the favorite part of the journey so far? 27:59
13. Given your family commitments, will Jeff move to Florida? Long term relationship plans? 29:12
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I hope you guys enjoyed the longer video! 🍿♥️ Timestamps for every question is in the description box. Please keep in mind a lot of these questions are very nuanced and might have required more clarification, but I did my best not to be too boring and trimmed it down so I didn’t ramble 😬 Let me know if you like Q&A videos and I can continue doing them every once in a while. Love you guys so much! 😘
I watch your new video and its awesome and I love it.
Sure? Please, make Some more Questions & Answer video's for Ya' subscribers. . .
Of course we enjoyed the video 💛
About the cheat day video : if you want to make one, make the second option you talk about in the vidéo please :)
I’d love to see both of those new videos BUT only if you feel like it would not effect you negatively mentally 💕
I hate how everyone is treating her like she isn’t knowledgeable (literally went to school for half the stuff she is talking about) and that she isn’t fit anymore. She’s stunning and clearly in great shape?
Lol forreal
She looks amazing!! I don’t get the hate either, whatever she did obviously worked to bring her back to health
She lost her fitness credibility. She knows nothing about being shredded. She only did it to get followers. Fat people always have excuses to stay fat. School teaches you main stream fitness and it is not the ideal way to eat and train. Calories in calories out is a lie but you sheep keep following Stephanie Fatmore i dont give a shit
@@KenWang2 clearly you do "give a shit" because you took the time to rant about it. If it upsets you this much that a stranger is happy and healthy then you really need to look into getting your mental health in order. I really hope you find a doctor to help you with your own self esteem.
@@KenWang2 you sure spend a lot of time getting worked up over someone who has no idea who you are loll
Some men think that women only change their bodies to be more attractive for them. You made it clear that wasn’t your goal and NOTHING triggers insecure men more than a woman who doesn’t care what they think. Particularly when that woman is smart and successful.
And beautiful
I really do think this is the reason more than someone wanting to fix or help someone.
YEP. I think it’s definitely something like this.
Couldn't have said it any better !
👏👏👏👏👏
I wonder if you really realize how many people, young women specifically, you have helped by sharing this journey. thank you
she inspired me to finally get rid of my restrictive lifestyle :D shes a life saver
Me! I had so many food issues in my life. Shes been a breath of fresh air after teen years in the age of the size 0
the bodyshaming during your journey was UNBELIEVABLE. almost like men can't let a woman LIVE
It's actually not a surprise especially once you see the (real life) sh*t men do and say to women in gyms/posting fitness content reported by @youlooklikeaman on instagram. Men's ego is bigger than their brain. Truly.
I STILL see people attacking Steph for not saying she had an eating disorder. Maybe she did, but she also might not have been professionally diagnosed so I actually appreciate that she didn't self-diagnose.
@@megan5495 exactly! I've talked to my therapist (he also specializes in eating disorders) about my struggles with eating that I had 13 years ago because I wasn't sure if I could have been diagnosed with anorexia at that point. He said he would have diagnosed me with it but he can't do it now because that was almost 14 years ago; but that's fine because I didn't want a diagnosis now, I was just curious. So when I tell someone I simply say that I've struggled with disordered eating.
@@CreativeCookie94 see, and even if steph did struggle with some kind of disordered eating like psychology sees it, she wouldn't be diagnosed with an eating disorder now. Also, she doesn't need a diagnosis i think
@@ninafugmann573 totally agree. It also takes some time to fully realize what you've done to your body and use those words out loud. Maybe she's just not at that point yet and that's ok. But she also doesn't have to comment on it.
I think men have such strong notion of "right" fitness and diet tactics according to what they have read that when a women says, "this doesn't work for me" they think you didn't try enough. They don't understand how it's different for us, how our bodies are meant for sustainance and not just to look jacked. Some men will think a women with 20 % bodyfat is fat without realising that it's the best level for her hormonal health, something that men don't think of unless it's steroids. I guess everyone just needs some more info of women, our hormonal structure and how our bodies are different even whole being healthy!
yes!! this!
YES
I agree. That is definitely part of it.
The fitness community Stephanie was in is full of very ambitious and disciplined body perfectionists. They are all about food and physique rules and they think that's how you achieve good health. They've become amateur dietitians, amateur physical therapists, and amateur gym trainers and they feel they have The Answer for everyone.
Their ignorance about women's health generally and Stephanie's situation in particular really showed.
Jeff had a point, too, that men do seem to do this more to women than men. I know there's a lot of literature about men responding well to male leadership and women responding well to female leadership. Or whether men are perceived by men and women as more competent or authoritative than women. Maybe people just believe Jeff more than Stephanie because he's a man.
But it's not just men doing it, I suppose. Stephanie got a lot of shit from men and women about her cheat days. I never see that on Nick Dompierre's channel.
So, to conclude, I don't know. lol Gender is a big part of it, I suspect, but it's not as simple as men checking women. Women do it to women, too. Do we all just like to correct women?
anyone who is formally educated on exercise science and human anatomy is taught this in academia so honestly those men are just not as smart as they think lol
It's a mixture of the increasing prevalence of science in fitness, and the old notions of beauty. Most of all, it's really just the men who don't challenge themselves to think differently. It's fascinating on how people are willing to digest just enough science to support themselves, but not challenge themselves.
Even for those men, there are requirements that they'll skip just to look a certain way, and they'll push that agenda onto other people. Aesthetics is a trap when it comes to fitness.
Everyone's body is different. Your body should reflect your own requirements for good health, self fulfillment (in a void of no one, would you be proud?), and sustain the activities you want to do.
Women's health has always been poorly researched. A mixture of ignorance, laziness, funding, and politics has gotten in the way of proper research. A major example is that my hospital only posts the signs of a heart attack for men, when the signs can be very different for women.
To be honest I feel like a lot of people hated your “All in” journey because they also felt the pressure to be lean, fit, shredded, but didn’t have the confidence to heal their bodies. Like I think those people refused to accept that they were too focused on their fitness and Stephanie starting this amazing journey just triggered them.
yesss i think a lot of it was jealousy rooted
Wow I never realized this was a thing. I found her all in vid quite liberating. Many friends did body building and I had no desire to do it even if I was pretty lean because it seemed way too strict. I thought it was so nice to see her let go of her fears and controls.
@@KimikoMaui I agree with you!
I think a lot of male haters only did that because the All In process says "eat at a comfortable level" which can mean to gain weight and not be slim or lean anymore i.e. in their eyes getting "fat". They obviously dont like "fat" women, so they hated on the All In process solely because they want women to be slim and lean... its pure sexism and misogyny, because they dont care about the womens comfort, they only care about their looks.
who tf cares about abs and being shredded really when you're 30 and fit and you can eat freely... the quality of life is what matters and eating guiltfree is what's making people happy!
I agree, I'd rather live my life being healthy that going too far and being too skinny
EXACTLYYYY
To the question, "Why did men especially respond negatively to your all-in?" I have observed since my 20s (and I am now in my 50s), that anything a woman does that affects her appearance that has nothing to do with what men find appealing, invokes hostility. Now men make decisions all the time about their appearance that have nothing to do with what women find appealing. But somehow when a woman cuts her hair because it's easier to take care of or to look more professional or even in support of a relative going through chemo, I have heard relentless hostility. It's as if, "How dare she have another priority besides looking good for us men!" That said, I also noticed that men's idea of what is appealing varies. But guys into fitness seeing a girl choosing to gain weight might find her less appealing and feel slighted that she dare to have some other priority than wanting to be pleasing to them.
The book The Beauty Myth talks a bit about the societal "ideal" that women have a very specific line to toe and the backlash that can be received from doing anything outside of that ideal. It's a great book, if you haven't already read it I highly recommend it 🙂
@@nicolew7818 Yes. It was Naomi Wolf's book, "The Beauty Myth" that I had in mind when I wrote the comment. I read the book when it was published. While I agreed with her description of the result, I disagreed with the source. I appreciate your recommendation. Recommending books that help to hone, evaluate and broaden our opinions on any matter of political relevance and open forums of political discussion, are key elements of creating a better world! Thank you for responding :)
This is so true. I don't even know if those men are consciously aware of it, it could be coming from an unconscious place, but they are definitely guilty of this. My whole life I've had men try to control my appearance and get hostile when I wanna make a decision that they don't approve of lol. One of those things was getting into distance running like my mum, so I could complete my first marathon by 22. My own dad scoffed at me and said I'd lose all my curves in my "prime years". I just said I can't lose what I never had in the first place lmaooo. But it's sad he couldn't be proud of his daughter for wanting to achieve a goal. Men do the same with female body hair and just all sorts of things. I think it's because they're conditioned to associate a woman's intrinsic value with her appearance. The men with status get the supermodels...it's a power fantasy.
@@jl4260 Such a shame! My dad once told me not to get too muscular because muscular women are unfeminin looking. I suppose they meant well. That is, he knew I was hoping to one day attract a male love partner and so in his way, he was letting me know because he felt that gaining muscle could pose an obstruction to that objective. I suppose your dad had the same intentions.But sometimes a girl has other goals (like health and fitness). Sigh
YESSS! I went through this recently but this was about my breasts & how they’re causing me physical pain that I’ve considered getting breast reduction. As soon as I mentioned it, ALL the men in my comments were guilting me saying “you shouldn’t get it, it won’t look good” “you shouldn’t get a breast reduction, many women wish they had your size breasts” as if my priority was beauty rather than health , i also was disgusted how they tried making me feel guilty for women who do not have large breasts. I also went through this when i chopped my hair off into a pixie to start my hair journey, & for some reason those same men flooded my messages telling me that i shouldn’t have cut it, that they had a solution to getting my hair healthy that didn’t involve cutting it, JUST so that i can fit into their standards of what I needed to look like. I will never understand why some men foam at the mouth over women have agency over their health, fitness, & overall body.
The fact that she was able to defy what society told her “fitness” was and redefine it to actually fit a healthy narrative is amazing. She truly is inspiring and deserves to be at the very top of the fitness industry.
I genuinely think you look more like a "fitness inspo" more now then you do when you were absolutely shredded
I 100% agree. I first saw one of her videos a few months before her all in journey, and I just looked at her wondering how it’s possible that she’s so skinny and shredded and thinking about how I could never look like that. Now that she’s at a healthier weight I feel like she’s a better role model for me and I can relate to her more.
Totally Agree! I look at Steph now and think *I COULD DO THAT* -- and BE HEALTHY! It really does make a different mental connection and in a REALLY GOOD WAY! AMAZEBALLS!
this!! before i thought she was wayyy too skinny i don’t know how the fitness industry prompts this nowadys
I feel like most people think this. She never really had a lot of muscle just was just verrrrry lean
I agree! She has my ideal body goals because I can also achieve that look. When she was much leaner, I knew I could never look like that but now her look is totally achievable.
Honestly, this is your best look. So look so happy, healthier, & curvier
Yaaaasss
i mean it’s nice that you’re complementing her but she looked amazing at her leanest and her heaviest. there’s not a better version of her that corresponds with weight🥺
@@theklavasiliou2624 i completely agree with you but i think that she looks better because she is happier yk??
@@aylaa2437 yeah her happiness is beautiful
@@theklavasiliou2624 exactly 😊❤️
Because of your “all in” video, I decided to calm TF down with stressing about food and have never felt better! I don’t constantly crave random food and eat a whole bag of chips in one sitting.
Omg congrats!
Same
Same, its long journey but same
she looks so beautiful no matter what her weight, but she looks so stunning and happy !! so proud of her :")
She’s not too far her initial weight. Looks thinner.
Right she is just so beautiful 😻
Male, former hater, perspective of where the hate comes from:
Personally, as a man, I think I can speak to the negative reaction. Men, especially those of us in the fitness community, all have worse body image issues than many women know or we want to admit. We feel that in order to be attractive, we must be both lean and threaded, like you were when you started your journey. The second societal pressure though, that I think created this reaction, is the expectation that men can eat enormous amounts of food regularly without gaining weight. As men in the fitness community who feel the need to stay lean, we know that this isn't true, but we still desire it. There is a constant mental battle between the desire to stay lean and shredded, and the desire to eat a shit ton of food, not just because we want to and are hungry, but because we feel we should be able to. Watching you "go all in" felt like watching you loose that battle. You had already won, you were shredded, but going all in felt like the hunger won, which is something I personally hated to see. What I think a lot of men failed to see though, is that the "all in" thing isn't loosing the battle between being shredded and hunger, it's a rejection of the idea of the battle to begin with. You're essentially living out many of our dreams in a way that our insecurities wouldn't let us, and we hate that it's going well for you, because it demonstrates that a cornerstone of our lifestyle not only isn't necessary, but is actually detrimental to our mental and physical health.
Just my opinion though, hope this made sense.
I appreciate this perspective a lot! Especially the "rejecting the idea of the battle to begin with". I hope you're way of thinking was most men's. There's generally a feeling that men just want to control how women act and look, but I think that's an old entitlement that is in fact fading in your average man. I'd much prefer if men missed the mark because they were jealous than because of internalized misogyny. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for such an honest answer. I think that a lot of criticism comes from the place you have described, stemming from an insecurity
I do think america and maybe most western culture has a problem with not acknowledging food addiction much like how drinking is almost expected from everyone- there's the thing where you're suppose to "be fun and party" and drinking alot is suppose to be a part of that but if you become addicted to alcohol then it's bad- which is kind of the probable outcome of drinking alot so it's a lose-lose. You can't 100% quit eating but no one "needs" a cheese burger or pizza... yet people are expected to eat this stuff all the time but also somehow be lean and shredded. I'm on a regular ass diet and even though my boyfriend is super supportive it seems like there's tension just because of how much social baggage there is with junk food being equated to a high quality of life when often times it's the opposite. Junky stuff is a dopamine release.
I'm well aware of the paradox of the hot/thin girlfriend who eats pizza all the time and I guess I didn't really think about how this expectation is also put on men- men are also shamed if they care about their physical appearance at all. I could argue that women have it harder but it seems like in fighting is less productive than pointing out this is just bad for everyone.
also this comment is great and thank you
Thanks for sharing.
I don’t think most men realize that leanness happens way less easily on women than men. I think they think we just “don’t work hard enough”
When we are designed to hold onto more fat and they are designed to hold onto more muscle.
people need to get out of the idea that lean = "good" shape
the human body needs fat, it needs to have not to little and not too much because both are bad obviously, but the human body needs fat as much as it needs muscle
Not me just thinking about how nice her arms look the entire video 🤦♀️
I literally can’t look away😅
Omg me too! She looks so good
me with my spaghetti arms: 👁👄👁
Same
Right?!! but also just thinking about the freedom that comes with not being so concerned about food.
LOVE the idea to do a redo of your cheat days - to see how you def. don’t feel the need to eat that much going all in,‘would love to see that!!
I male 18 years old and I struggled with anorexia nervosa for 7 years and I went to Recovery (true Recovery,not quesy,if I speed it correctly) 4 month ago.
I know that your journey is different from someone who comes from eating disorder(because it's differently impact on body just dieting and when you come from OCD e.d.,super stress around food and huge rules,gosh),but I really appreciate what are you doing and your question:"why all man hated your journey all in" Because I think many man have orthorexia and that constantly strict their diet,over exercise and I think they wish to do what you have done but their are afraid of weight gain,cuz we live in culture when Thin and Restrictions are normal,which is Not Normal.
Our Bodies love us and we should and must to trust and to listen this Amazing organism!
Wish you and everyone all the best and unrestricted eating(eating whenever,however,much you want without restriction and without any judgment,oh and any compensation)
Remember your body has a set point weight,like a set color of your hair,eye,set height and it's the same,but we have different body shapes and weight like any other species,for example different types of dogs,cats etc,it also applies to humans!
Love from Ukraine 🇺🇦😃
Thank you for this comment and sharing your story. What you said resonated with me, I hope you are continuing to do well on your journey Dmitry ❤️
Hi! How are you now? and Im so proud of you for went to recovery!
Strength to u brother! Best wishes on ur healing journey. Hope you have reached many happy goals since your comment
Your current confidence makes you look that much more attractive.
Off topic: But you look like a real life disney princess, you are so beautiful 😭
So truee
She is one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen and with her gorgeous long hair she could definitely play a Disney princess like jasmine 😍🤩
FOR REAL !! 😩
@@jameshowlett8050 she's so attractive! And her black hair is soo beautiful. Black hair is the most beautiful imo. 🖤
it's true if disney made a pocahontas movie it should be her .
I'm a man, but I have enough life experience ( a nice way of saying I've been around the sun a few times) to know that I make plenty of mistakes. I'm always happy to change my mind in the face of a better approach.
Between your "all in" video and Jeff's interview with Eric Trexler, I managed to figure out that I was undereating tremendously. I didn't go "all in", but I started eating when I was hungry, and eating to satiety, and over the course of a couple weeks, I saw and felt dramatic improvement.
My experience almost certainly pales in comparison to what you went through, but I would like to say thanks for posting it. It really helped me to see my problem, and that change has made my life a lot better.
You look so happy and gourgeous. You have always been but now girl ✨THE CONFIDENCE ✨ I admire you.
My theory: Men (hashtag not all men bla bla bla but lots of men) can't wrap their heads around the idea of a woman making a decision about her body and appearance that does not prioritize or maximize her attractiveness to men. Men and women are both taught from a young age that much of a woman's value comes from how attractive she is. That's why female sex appeal is capitalized upon so dramatically in advertising and entertainment. You made the decision to start your all-in journey to improve your quality of life, not to improve your appearance, which defies this idea that your attractiveness should be your #1 priority, especially since you knew you were definitely going to gain weight (which is also considered "bad" for your attractiveness level). The fact that you prioritized your own wellbeing and happiness over the approval of these dudes (and their creepily narrow definition of "attractive") pissed them right off. And they respond by calling you horrible things in a desperate attempt to regain their power and ability to influence the way you feel about yourself - a power you symbolically took away from them when you went all in. You rewrote the rules on your own value, and your new rules eliminate them entirely.
To be quite clear about my own perspective: you were beautiful and awesome before your all-in journey, and you're beautiful and awesome and HAPPY now! I have learned so much following your all-in journey and am very grateful for the vulnerability and generosity you've shown by sharing your story. Those guys are lame. You are fantastic.
This was so interesting to read, thanks!
Just loved what you said!
Totally agree! They feel powerless by your rejection of pursuing the aesthetic that appeals to them.
This was perfectly said, wow. Couldn’t agree more
Go off Maggie! Love it
Also, honestly, it is a loud minority who preferred you as thinner...MOST thought and knew you were sick and too thin. You are beautiful no matter what but a healthy body wins everytime.
Okay so your eyeshadow matches your leggings and that's more put together than my entire life hahaha
Edit: Also you’re a rockstar 💕
Haha that’s possibly the greatest response I’ve ever seen 😂
😂😂😂
when she closes her eyes, I thought she got patched by someone.
Dead!
I Love her style 😍
"Men just wanna help women". No, men just wanna correct women. Jeff gave a perfect example, where he said that if he has a butt wink when squatting, men won't comment as much correcting him. Why? Because men will look at Jeff, know his channel and content, and know Jeff knows what he's talking about.
But the men commenting about Steph's butt wink are assuming she doesn't know... because she's a woman. Women in the fitness industry STILL have to deal with people assuming they just don't know that much about weight lifting. It's still seen as a men's thing, and even though there is far more acceptance of women, the acceptance tends to come from women who are heavy lifters. Women who don't body build aren't accepted easily by men within the industry; and that's fine. We, as women, shouldn't strive to be accepted by men. But it explains why men are more critical of women, particularly in Steph's case where she moved away from the extreme body building community
Absolutely all of this. What's crazy is that it's well documented that women have an easier time with mind muscle connection and form correction. We've got accuracy built into us at a higher rate than men. If a women has a baby issue in her squat form, chances are she can still get a better workout than a man because her body will tell her something isn't quite right eventually (especially on leg day, Jeff has a video on the difference between the sexes that demonstrated this).
Agree. And I think Jeff answered diplomatically, which is good. But yes, I agree that the word 'correct' is probably more accurate than 'help'.
mansplaining 😑
Brings me back to the time when a random guy came over to offer me unsolicited advice on my dead lift form. Dude was talking out of his ass since his advice would definitely screw up my back.
That’s literally what Jeff was trying to say without being too aggressive about it and Stephanie knew what he meant to
As a normal weight girl, I finally get over the "constantly want to lose 10 more lbs" mindset lately. It's the same as "we will never feel like we are making enough money", the beauty standard in this society also makes us think that "if we lose that extra 10 lbs, 20lbs, then we will be hot and sexy and whatever". The goal of losing weight and get fit should be all about making us feel good! (unless you need to be fit for your job) I would say that as long as we eat good, feel good, look healthy, that's all it is the matter!
It’s the fear of being fat. No girl wants to believe that gaining weight is the way out of this, we all want an answer that doesn’t “require” gaining weight.
I think that's also why men attacked her. I think they have a similar fear not just for themselves but probably for their actual or imaginary partner "letting themselves go" and respond in a rude and aggressive manner even though she never did that. She continued to be healthy and active.
@@KisDraga 100% agreed. I’m pretty sure 1 out of 10000 guys out there would be supportive like Jeff is (at least what we know from the videos).
Agree! Fatphobia is at the center of so much of the accepted fitness and nutrition advice in the industry and in society at large.
Exactly.
if u start eating what your body ask for you are not gonna gain weight and if u do you are allowed to
The level of self control that Stephanie had before her all-in journey (and still has!) blows my mind. I can’t imagine being that hungry all the time and maintaining that level of self discipline.
It's called an eating disorder. Not something to be proud about:)
Recovering from an eating disorder was crazy because I realized that hunger doesnt just literally mean your stomach feeling completely empty. It's always when you want to think, thinking about a food, wanting a food, feeling shaky, feeling naseous, and more. And regular people just eat when they experience these symptoms. I am so happy that we've both overcome extreme hunger because that was a horrible way to live! I still think about food but not all the time. Only half as much. So I've got my life back in a way.
even if gaining weight didn't have this whole ass purpose, why can't people just leave you alone
because unfortunately people have opinions and this is a publicly posted video
Perhaps people feel angry if they're uncomfortable, and those who looked at Stephanie during the middle or beginning of her "all in" journey that felt uncomfortable, so they took it to social media and started barking up that tree :/ it's one thing if Stephanie did indeed make all in up and not base anything off science, but she studied so many papers and spoke with dietitians and other specialists in the health space before embarking on her journey! Seriously, people need to get a hobby
omg literally RIGHT like I'm in All In now and I always feel like I have to explain why I'm 50 pounds heavier, like I can't just be this weight and not have anyone say anything
@@tal4976 omg i wish you all the best and i hope your all in is going well! don't let people judge you for the struggles you're going through and how you chose to fix it!
@@ninafugmann573 thank you I've been getting a lot of support from my friends and family and people on TH-cam so it's been really amazing!!
The whole “fitness is leanness” is an issue in itself. Because fitness isn’t leannes. CrossFit proves that, we actually test fitness and you can’t be that lean and actually perform. We need to encourage more people to focus on what their body can do rather than what it looks like.
AMEN ❤️
Hey Bethany, great comment!
Exactly
Callisthenics
When there are no forbidden foods, there's never "cheating"... it's always just eating.
True! I wish Stephanie would call it something other than "cheat days" because I feel like it feeds into diet culture and perpetuates to idea that she is "cheating" on a diet
Alexia Hyde I think she is calling it a “cheat day” because she was referring to her cheat day videos and what she used to call a cheat day
@@laurenmcarthur8688 its not healthy language. she doesnt have to call it anything. if she wants to be a good role model she should just say "what i eat in a day"
Love that
Petition to call them party days
I have immense respect for the way you take care of your mom. So many people just leave their aging parents because it’s too much trouble, their life is more important and truthfully it’s damn hard to make those sacrifices. I admire you most for that.
She's like: Here is me, no longer shredded and fit. And I'm like: What's she talking about? Where is she not super slim? Her earlobes?
Otome no Timing Exactly what I said! She looks almost as thin as before!
@@beautifulbrittany1868 but even better now!
@Eriicaa yesss that’s it, she doesn’t want to live in order to look shredded or fit anymore
I can’t stress(:Dd) this enough she looks so good!
“stretch”...?? 😳
Stress* ?? ✅
@@KneelB4NoMan oh my god kansbsbbs
@@kyoungblood9 yes, god, sorry:Ddd
I think she looked unreal before
It’s crazy because you don’t realize before what she looks like compared to now it’s a whole new person
I disagree with the question that said, “people prefer you thinner.” I think you’re much more beautiful now! And you’ve helped me accept my body type. Thank you for your content Stephanie! ❤️
stephanie youre too nice, it's called MANSPLAINING honey. the bane of every woman's existence
“Honey” 😂
sorry :( I hope honey doesn't come off as condescending!! I meant it with love!
@@HaHaLooLoo They don't have women splaining because women can't explain anything.
@@HaHaLooLoo haha no you're fine i just thought it sounded ironic to me because i dislike that word, but no hate, I agree with you!!!!
@@jasonshmummers8911 are you the person she’s talking about?🤣
PLEASE RECREATE YOUR CHEAT DAY!!! It would be so interesting to see the difference now!!
I think it would be great to keep her old unhealthy habits in the past
Yes
It was and is an eating disorder so probably not a good idea.
@@jasonrios3120 Oh hell yes!! I can' t see any sense in " secretly promoting" these disordered behaviors!
Why would anyone want to watch that?
I think men also feel a sort of "entitlement" towards women and their bodies - so ofc it makes sense that they have to get in there and provide you with their unsolicited opinions.
I think you are wrong.
Most women have their requirments in terms of what they want in a man. Like them being taller. Nothing wrong with that. But it goes both ways.
@tjašika Unless you are a man who has done this to women how do you know anything about what it’s like or what we think? I’m not pretending like I know exactly what women are thinking.
@@vagabond4576 it’s fine to have your preferences but not to feel entitled enough to tell women how they have to look
TheMightyOdin same goes to you then.
girl you look absolutely gorgeous and what matter the most is that you're happy now that what matters
Steph, your courage in sharing your all in journey has saved me from a life of chronic anorexia. I cannot even begin to thank you enough. I hope that we begin learning more about the Steph who isn't defined by "all in"... cos, honestly, that is the most interesting thing about you!!! Xxx 🥰🦋
I’ve never been a TH-cam commenter but You talking about your mom made tear up. I’m experiencing the exact same thing with my mom. Keep taking care of mom. You’re doing a great job. Remember you can only do what is within your control.
i consider you guys lucky to have moms to take care of...
@@ozfrankie sorry for your loss
ME TOO!
I think the idea of attenpting an old cheat day would be super interesting! but only if you feel comfortable doing it
IM JUST HAPPY TO NOT BE HINGRY ANYMORE!!! Girl YES! I did an unintentional “all in” in college when I was finally so sick of trying to be skinny and what finally pushed me to make a change was the fact that I didn’t want to obsess over food anymore! I literally had the thought “I want to use this brain space for something other than food/calories”
I have had this thought before too!! Imagine all the other thoughts that could be had!!
Imagine a world were we would learn/teach that food is energy for our brains (and other organs) to function properly 😮 instead of being 'a way to control your physical appearance/level of attractiveness'🙄
The way all those "fitness" men scrutinised your body was unacceptable, inaccurate and disgusting. It's really frustrating how whether it's passively or actively, men really see themselves as "default" and women as something else. Couldn't sit through a single one of those redundant videos where they completely disregarded your background, expertise and you simply being a human being and went along saying the most vile things. I think you have created such an important space here. You've spoken about the toxicity of the fitness industry, the sexism, body positivity, actually eating healthy and just being healthy in general. So thank you for that Stephanie :)
Dude ima guy just getting into this exercise stuff idk why other guys find the need to attack her she’s made some great progress is very healthy and proud of where she is I find her story interesting cuz I came from Jeff and found his vid about this interesting but I had no idea there were men attacking her why tho I know I sound dumb but I’ve always though sexism wasn’t a big deal here and I don’t understand why they would attack her why do they feel the need to do so even if they have that dumb idea why follow through and attack her for it it’s her body not yours dip shit. Any how cya hope you can explain or have some kind of knowledge as to why guys feel that way and how I can avoid that mind set as well cuz I don’t wanna end up being a toxic sexist without noticing out of my own stupidity and ignorant mentality on this. Anyhow this is just upsetting.
Who’s scrolling through the comments like 👀
Yes gurl
hahaha i always do with stephs vids
I believe that men with control issues and poor relationships with the opposite gender often feel like telling women how to live, what to look like, what to eat, is them “helping”. It’s often just a narcissistic fantasy and they have zero self awareness. They don’t understand that their opinion on someone else’s life (mainly women’s lives) doesn’t matter.
You’re doing so great and are such an inspiration!
Add on: I also wanted to mention that there are many men out there who LOVE to talk about the differences between male and female anatomy. They love pointing out the differences. But these same men can’t have an adult conversation about female anatomy, menstruation, pregnancy, or anything to that affect without cringing. Some people don’t want to learn they just want to teach, even if they know nothing about the subject...
Yes, my dad kept telling me how "concerned" he was that I'm not doing enough exercise. and then when i said it's not his business he said: "i know you said it's none of my business but I'm concerned you're not getting enough exercise". sheesh.
hey yall, I wanted to put in a perception of a guy. I am a huge fan of Stephanie. After waiting some while to see the comments of the other viewers, as well as, forgetting to make a comment due to COVID. I wanted to address this question from the seemingly lower level of male followers. The question of "Why did men especially respond negatively to your all-in?"
My answer: The initial idea of going all in I had a natural jerk of like "why?!". Once I saw that she was happy, I did not care too much after that. Now seeing how she fluctuate her body weight down to a natural set point, it obviously was the best decision for her. The reason why I had a natural jerk reaction I think was this "against the standard" like "who gains weight? Like why?". It was so against the social norm for not just women, but for the fitness community. It was shocking. Personally, I also was thinking about myself. I have similar problems of mass hunger and body image issues. So when this skinny, intelligent, and social media popular person took the jump to not care what people thought, was internally difficult for me to understand, due to my own issues.
I do want to say from anecdotal conversations with friends who do body shame women or did take this idea of a women gaining weight negatively - the comments about how men think women dont know anything about nutrition and fitness is very true. There is a huge double standard ESPECIALLY in the gym culture of Powerlifting and bodybuilding.
We love this introspection and honesty👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Thanks for the insight!
Men’s negative reaction to your all in journey is pure sexism: assuming you don’t know what you’re doing, not catering to the male gaze and everything else echoed in the comments
You could be right about that. I'm also wondering if men struggle with food/craving/hunger as much as women? Maybe they just don't understand why Stephanie started this journey? 🤔
ding ding. misogyny for the win. the kicker is that women can perpetuate it as well - sometimes even worse than men because it's a projection of our own self-hate
bex0r hardly. I truly don’t care what fat mam got shredded, and would not go to comment section to talk them down... what for??? Never thought of that.
If I watched any man losing weight video if I ever commented was well done. If they got fat again I did not feel urge to tell them they are loser and look bad or should do this or that..
zero interest in that.
By the way, men should leave this lady to her capable boyfriends hands! These videos are relatable to us ladies. You men are not getting it at all. Is not for you to tell her what you like her to look like! No one cares! (She hopefully gives 0 fucks) she finally reached her perfect weight as opposed to her skeletal muscly past self. (And it was hard to transition)
seeing you taking care of your mum makes you respect you even more. huge respect.
Hey yo shout out to the homie Jeff for being so supportive of you, your mother, etc. Weaker and more selfish men would leave, or force you to make a decision. Happy for you two, don't listen to the naysayers who try and direct your lives!
Men like to mind a woman's business period. They love to constantly "help" us meanwhile you're a doctor. You have spent years in the health community and doing the research and putting in the work. Also I think men just hated that they can't enjoy you the way you looked. Men have an issue with us having autonomy.
PREACH
Men are just huge egos wrapped in skin. Periodt. 😂
*she has a doctorate, is not a doctor
Nah, nothing about Steph putting on weight was wrong, the problem was that she DOES care what other people think. She has anxiety issues and is now dependent on social media for a career (rather than her PhD work). Unfortunately, it’s just the nature of the internet for it to bring out the worst in people (aka comment section). She is far too emotionally raw in videos, and this makes her vulnerable. Being easily provoked by comments incites more nasty comments. I’ve never seen male fitness channels get so emotional ab what people think, video after video after video. Other female fitness channels on YT aren’t as raw. Steph needs to work on herself or upload vids somewhere else than YT bc anonymity element won’t change.
Right?? It’s like, “yeah Stephanie has a PhD and Jeff has exercise science expertise, but go off random gym bro you must be the one who is right”
Honestly I think the reason why SOME men had a problem with your all-in journey is 2 fold. 1. I think they see a beautiful woman and assume you’re less intelligent or capable than they are, they perhaps see you as a little princess who doesn’t know what she’s doing and needs help/needs saving 😂 and 2. Just straight-up fat-phobia. They see a beautiful woman gaining weight and fear the idea of you “getting fat” because they don’t find larger bodies attractive.
Duuude she looks so good. When she was super skinny she didn’t look this good. Kinda looked skeleton-like back then. But now she is so strong and is still very lean. Also happy people always look better! I am so happy for her and I relate because I am on a similar journey.
“You have to be ‘just right’ for society to accept you” this resonated with me
Re some men: I think there’s this internal/mental struggle to be both a “good person” and simultaneously be allowed to view women as a sexual fantasy for them. For instance, part of the fit-girl fantasy myth is that it’s “good for the woman’s health” to be at certain beauty/body standards. When someone draws attention to the fact that at times or in some cases, the sexual fantasy they want to see is mutually exclusive with the health of the woman at the other end of that fantasy, they find it personally insulting or threatening to their worldview. They can no longer have it both ways. They either have to admit they want to feel entitled to have the women they “consume as media” at a certain level of visual fantasy at the cost of her health, or that maybe their fantasy isn’t realistic and this person isn’t “their fantasy” but a person. Ie, if men saw previous “you” as “proof” that there exists the ‘perfect smart and thin and sexy and sporty’ woman out there (and maybe someday they could be with someone like you, if not you), then your honesty that you were unhappy at that time and it was unsustainable shatters the dream.
Or, as that famous book “Ways of Seeing” puts it... “Men act and women appear. Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at.” This dynamic is the traditional set-up, and as we move away from this into more self-actualization for all people, it’s going to upset some people to have to recognize what we used to consider “normal” between men and women is pretty messed up.
Aka you’re killing their dreams. 😂
This woman is so smart, honest, and kind. I don’t know how anyone could hate on her journey.
Sending you ALL the LOVE!! I am 42. When I was 30 I was heavily involved in the fitness modeling industry. I’d been a “gym rat” since I was 15. 5 days a week 2 hrs a day weight training to maintain “industry standards of female fitness.” Working out through both pregnancies and even hitting the gym hard 1 month after brain surgery because I feared weight gain and muscle loss. I had a breaking point a few yrs ago and just didn’t feeling like it was the best thing for MY body anymore. So I stopped the crazy diet and scheduled meals and portion controlled eating. I fell out of the “fitness community” that I’d been heavily involved in, but found a new positive me, and happier me, and a healthier me. YOU are AWESOME. Thank you for sharing your ALL IN journey and showing both sides. You are absolutely beautiful inside and out. Anyone nay saying your methods are not living in your body!! People love to preach to other people, but we are all individuals and no one thing is right for everyone. Love you girl.
The short answer to the man reaction question is misogyny. Honestly that's what it is. The semantics could be much more complex but at the end of the day (and the fitness industry is an incredibly large example of this) misogyny affects so much of society.
Something I've experienced myself is that men react really adversely to intuitive eating. I don't know why, but it feels like they think it's some sort of woo woo, new-age hippie thing; not an evidence-based approach to health and nutrition based on your body's incredibly sophisticated systems for keeping you alive.
It's this. It's nothing to do with misogyny. Men who aren't too science literate and who also believe in free will and have a strong inner locus of control will react poorly to the idea that your body just 'knows'. Undoubtedly they believe that spreading this idea will cause net negative harm too, because they (rightly) believe that people will take this idea and run with it, using it as justification for destructive eating habits.
@@pariah8730 No it absolutely has to do with misogyny. Also what makes you think that people will eat destructively if they have an intuitive relationship with food? The studies around IE show that while initially, people may eat more than their needs, after some time they do regulate, assuming they have access to all sorts of foods.
@@ameliaryczek8433 No, it doesn't. It has to do with (like you said) a percentage of men who see it as woo woo, and so think it's not productive to spread as a message. Perhaps more men than women hold the above opinion, but they would balk at the idea coming from a man too. I most agree with you, and the science, but in the real world people do use ideas like these in pop-science articles to say it's okay to eat what you like whenever you like - and for people with poor eating habits, this is bad advice. Whatever evolutionary mechanisms we have to keep a tight feedback loop on our weight/hunger are often ineffective in the face of highly processed foods, so practically it often won't work. The truth is that most people already eat 'intuitively', the vast majority of people do not count calories or regulate their diet to any large degree, and the majority of people in the large Western countries are overweight.
@@pariah8730 Ok, glad you have an opinion. I'm gonna stick with the people who've been studying this for decades.
Attempting an old cheat day would be so cool! A lot of people struggling w restriction feel like once they start eating a lot of food they're just gonna keep eating that much forever (like you said in the question about binging). So seeing how you feel now vs. when you had extreme hunger would be really insightful. you're journey has been so inspiring, thank you for making videos
I nearly cried when Steph looked like she was gonna tear up talking about her mom. Sending u guys lots of love & strength♥️ xx
It truly confuses me to see any remotely negative views about how you look now. Objectively, you're very fit and toned. I don't get what these people are talking about. Not to mention you're stunningly pretty with a great body
Not so confusing really. It is a subjective matter.
Same! Like huh? She is still thin and fit!
I think she was referring to when she started the all in journey. Some people thought that she was eating infinity calories and told her that was not healthy, especially when she started to get really swollen and gain weight very rapidly eating loads of junk food. Women were concerned too but didn’t have the audacity to say anything negative as most are coming from a place of understanding insecurities and wanting to see the process through hoping for the best.
The good thing is she seems very happy and healthy now.
Men's reaction: Patriarchy and internalized fatphobia. It's a system that wants women to stay small and quiet. So seeing a woman satisfy her hunger and take up more space breaks all the rules. Especially a smart one where research was reviewed...cue mansplaining.
Yerp
Exactly this.
Ugh so true
i could listen to steph talk all day. she’s such a blessing to the fitness community (and world in general (: )
For everyone going through a hard time here is a quick verse *the pain you have been feeling now can’t compare to the joy that is coming* 💗
I love you Stephanie ! Thank you for being my light throughout my ED recovery ❤️
I love you too!! I'm happy I can help!! 🙏😘
"men don't think women know anything about nutrition".....She literally has a PhD in science....
She said in an earlier video that she knew very little about Nutrition.during her very lean days. Her area of study was in cancer research/ biochemistry
To be fair, even Medical doctors aren’t given much information on nutrition during their time at university. Surprising, but true.
Facts, although the degree if I’m right is in kinesiology which is the body mechanics / exercise science
I get what you mean!! That was my first thought too!! Gotta love mansplaining...
@@weshervey2202 Let me set you straight - she has a BS in Molecular Biology, two Masters, one in Women's Health, the other in Pathology and Cell Biology, and a PhD in Cancer Research. All of that subsequently in her twenties - quite impressive. However, note - none of it is nutrition or kinesiology. Take care
@TheRedChai thanks
Let them hate. You did something about your situation at the time. And you helped everyone become forgiving of their food relationship.
I have been struggling a lot with my arm size since gaining back healthy weight - my husband always pulls up your videos to remind me that I’m OKAY and I can’t thank you enough for all you do🖤
That’s amazing that your husband is so loving and supportive.😌💞
i can't wrap my head around how someone this beautiful exists JESUS
As someone constantly falling in and out of ED habits ive started this all in diet and for the first time ever i dont feel guilty! I have been having nutritious food and also my mom made banana cake and I ate 2 slices with no guilt. If i want something, im eating it! I feel so much better already, i usually feel like im starvimg all day and wait til im in pain to eat🤦🏿♀️ thankyou so much stephanie❤
Stephanie is so real and genuine, and I love how she just shares so much with the internet about her journey
I can only sit and watch your Q&A because of how amazing they are edited. You include so many visuals that it is such a pleasure to watch. You are stunning inside and out!
I love your commitment to taking care of your mom. We forget that we all will be old one day. I know it sometimes could feel like a burden but when you do good things, then good things happen to you. That is the universe. God bless you!
I feel like someone has to point this out.... your editing is so fire !! always get hyped when you upload :)
and the camera quality is always fireee
everything is fire:-)
I think the idea of “losing control” by “letting yourself go” is what drove a lot of men to have that visceral reaction to your journey. But rather than it coming from a place of “men losing control over women,” I think it was more men’s insecurities and fear of “losing control” over themselves if they just ate (no preoccupation with aesthetics/being super shredded or jacked etc). And they were projecting that onto you, because they saw it as you having a lack of self control, no willpower, etc which a lot of men, especially those in the fitness industry, pride themselves on. They want to believe that once you do something like “all in,” you’re just gonna be a fat, lazy, unhealthy blob confirming their own biases about what it means to be “healthy vs unhealthy” and “disciplined vs weak.” And then of course all the other stuff such as not fully understanding how women’s hormones come into play, following only snippets of the journey before commenting, underestimating women’s knowledge on nutrition, etc probably factored in as well.
Adding from another comment from a previous man who was a hater. Jealous that she was reaching acceptance and happiness doing the opposite of the normal suffering you are 'expected' to endure. Why do I have to starve myself to be ripped and work so hard while others don't have to? Really questions your core values.
Misery loves company.
I’m surprised men would criticize your transformation. I think the main critics are hardcore fitness dudes who are only into ripped women. Most guys prefer women in the shape that Stephanie is in now.
Being lean is mainly attractive for men, but for women it’s actually better for them to have a moderate amount of body fat.
STEPH MAKE A PODCAST STEPH MAKE A PODCAST STEPH MAKE A PODCAST PLEASE!!!!!❤️
Why I think a lot of men had such a negative reaction to your All In journey is because they didn't "like the way you looked" because they believe that women (especially in fitness) should look a specific way, and they were not ready to accept anything else. I would just sum it up with 'toxic/fragile masculinity'. Like Jeff said, a lot of men think they are correct and anyone else is incorrect so they want to talk about it when no one asked for their opinion. Anyways, I think you are beautiful Steph
I was at the fittest I’ve ever been before quarantine started, and I beat myself up SO much for gaining weight and not feeling like working out. I was extremely hungry all the time and felt guilty after consuming any food, but I just couldn’t stop, and I hated myself for it!
Your story has seriously helped me so much, thank you for sharing your journey!
For me personally, when Stephanie (someone with a literal Ph.D.) said she was going to do 'All In', I was like cool! The fact that other people hated on her for something as simple as eating enough to satiate herself.... is just so weird to me. It genuinely does not affect others at all!!! I am so happy that you're happy and you look amazing!
Tbh your “fit version” seemed to me under weight. Even though you looked muscular.
I’m so glad you did this and it worked. Even though you went through a lot. You look healthy now. And I 👀 some muscle now your arms look great. I’m so happy you feel happy 😃
She looked awful and annoriex and gross she is still too skinny she needs to gain some weight
@@MelB868 lmao ok sis
@@MelB868 Umm... don't body shame her.
@@MelB868 I agree. She was SCARY SKINNY!!
Every time she talks about her mom 🥺🥺 so much love and devotion is admirable.
You look so much more happier now. You are literally glowing and I’m proud of your journey. ♥️
So excited for this! I just got my period back after 2yrs of restriction🙏🏻🤍
congrats!!! ❤️❤️❤️
This is awesome! Congratulations :) How long did it take to get there?
@@frannyj2030 thank you!! It’s been about 2 yrs! Quitting intermittent fasting was the last piece of restriction I had to remove🙌🏻
@@kelzirbel thank you!!
I remember losing my period for 3 months I didn’t realize how unhealthy it was until I told my mom. I was like umm I don’t know what to do. I kept going with my diet until my brother said let’s go to five guys Victoria. I got a shake and fries and my period came back a couple days later. I look back now and think if I didn’t have that meal what could have happened to me
note to self: over disciplining yourself leads to a faster bounce back. eat healthy yes, but also allow yourself to live your life and enjoy the delicious food life has to offer. you can still be healthy amidst all this, but be happy.
My personal theory as to why people had such a reaction to your All-In journey is that we as a society have spent so much time idealizing the exact, shredded physique you had that all of those people probably wish they had what you did and couldn’t fathom there being any negative side effects, or something that would possibly make any of that ‘not worth it.’ In their eyes, it would be like winning the lottery and then donating all the money.
I’m so glad you’ve finally found peace with food, though, and that you aren’t letting all the negative voices wear you down!! :))
I don't really understand how a cheat day would even figure into being "all in" or intuitive eating--there's nothing to cheat on, right? There's no such thing as cheating when you're just eating as your body is signaling you should.
She should just call it an adventurous day of eating or something lol
I liked the idea of repeating an old "cheat day" she did before......she probably couldn't finish all the food because she isn't that hungry anymore
What like wasting enough food to feed a village in the third world?
I agree! "Cheat" implies she's doing something bad. Allowing yourself to eat what you want when you want is NOT cheating.
@@colleenkensey2580
I like to use the term "Treat Day"
On men's reactions: I'm sure you're right. Also -- and I've seen this idea echoed in other comments, too -- but I think it has to do with men's perceived ownership of women and their bodies. When they see a woman who fits in with culturally accepted standards of what is attractive -- thin, beautiful, or intelligent -- and she pushes back against any of those, it's a threat. Like, "how dare you not comply with my expectations of you?"
When I got my nose pierced years ago, it wasn't *quite* as common as it is now. I got a huge hoop put in to protect the tissue in my nose. I would get weird, unsolicited reactions from men to the effect of, "I wouldn't have expected a girl like you to have a piercing like that." Backhanded compliment if I've ever heard one! It seemed like they were simultaneously attracted to and repulsed by me.
After years of letting that marinate, I've come to think it's this sense of entitlement and ownership that makes men feel they even have the right to comment in the first place.
The last question hit me🥺 I love how committed you are to your mom and i love how Jeff loves her just as much. I know you guys got everything under control. Love you both so much❤️ sending you so much love and light ✨
can we please talk about how gorgeous Steph is, not only from the outside but her entire personality! And also how supportive Jeff is, we need more people like the two of you
I think the reason people reacted badly is because they held you up to their standard of perfection, you had the discipline they were looking to achieve. When you decided to let go of that and be intuitive (something they are struggling/struggle with) they think their own work will fail or they are working hard to achieve something that is maybe not possible. It is more a reflection of their own stress, pressure than necessarily you as a person testing out your eating habits.
I have such respect for you, Stephanie. I was crying through your ending because you’re just a truly good person ❤️ God bless you and Jeff and your wonderful relationship!
girl you look so amazing. and I don't mean "you look skinny" - you look healthy and strong!!
You are so inspiring, as someone who struggles with anorexia and obsessive food thoughts, you actually help me❤️
Hi! I'm not sure I understand the concept of a "cheat day," when my understanding is that you've been eating what you want, when you want, to satiety, for months. What is there to cheat?
For the youtube monetization, of course. Money money money
Unfortunately for Steph, she is out of ideas for quality videos, that is why she is talking about herself for hours on end.
@@TheRedChai bitter, hateful people are so amusing to watch. From a psychology standpoint, it's almost always because they are unhappy and discontent with their own lives. Hope whatever's making you act like an ass will go away soon and you'll find peace, which will make you be a decent human towards others. Amen.
@@TheRedChai What the hell is the point of spending time complaining in the comments of a TH-cam video you 'don't care about'?
There must be some personal problem there, I'm sorry. Envy maybe? Wanting to feel superior? Oh so many potential causes, I hope you grow from this nonsense.
To answer the question- she does eat the amount that her body wants in terms of hunger cues. But she also eats generally healthy. It's less eating everything, but more fulfilling her hunger signals in a healthy way.
I think if she did do a version now, you'd probably see how like half a donut would be enough whereas previously she'd want multiple, for example.
@Kendra Mullen but what would even be the point? why force yourself to overeat and waste food? I used to struggle with stress eating and I would never purposefully force myself to binge to "prove how far I've come." It's like having an alcoholic do a bar crawl to prove how much they've recovered. It's totally nuts and irresponsible. Idk how she has the audacity to even consider it.