Experiencing Gender Dysphoria as a Mormon | Amanda & Shaye Scott

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 316

  • @_Nat_A_
    @_Nat_A_ 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +30

    Watching this again a year after Shaye has transitioned and she is so much more herself. It would be amazing if they would do another Mormon Story.

    • @likemagicofficial
      @likemagicofficial 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I believe in the book of Mormon. I am trans and I read it. I liked working with missionaries and receiving lessons.

  • @fleurhufflepuff2198
    @fleurhufflepuff2198 2 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    Margi is such a sweet heartwarming person. I feel hugged by a mother everytime she speaks. She's so bright and intelligent in her inputs as well. I just love it.

  • @BuckeBoo
    @BuckeBoo 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    Ex-Mormon here for the past several decades. Lived in Cedar City next door to St George. I’m grateful to learn of Shaye and Amanda’s experience.

  • @kathrynreissauthor
    @kathrynreissauthor ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Shaye, I think that you have absolutely NOT disappointed God; in fact, I think the 'calling' you were waiting for, is THIS, what you're doing now. Transitioning because that's what you need to do but also SHARING YOUR STORY so frankly; you are going to save SO MANY lives. What a blessing you are!

  • @SweetKel
    @SweetKel 2 ปีที่แล้ว +170

    This has been a blessing to me on several levels. My religious restraint was evangelicalism but many of the issues are the same. I knew I was a girl in a boy's body at age three. Sadly, I had to hide my identity in order to survive socially. I finally began living full-time as a woman at age 57, after my parents had died, my kids had grown up and most of my family and Christian social circle had already left me. I have many regrets. Amanda is amazing. I can't even imagine a life with a partner who affirmed me like she does. Thank you.

    • @nadinehansen9241
      @nadinehansen9241 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      So sorry you couldn't live and love as your real self. I hope life is better now.

    • @lontami1
      @lontami1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Our hearts go out to you. Give yourself a hug from us and now you are loved and accepted just as you are!❤

    • @yooperskeptic
      @yooperskeptic 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Your joy comes thru the beautiful smile in your gorgeous photo! I admire you and all who take what must be frightening steps to live as their true selves.

    • @vickismith2872
      @vickismith2872 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      There are many gay communities in Utah from all walks of life. I was visiting Salt Lake and was amazed that they were so open in public. I also learned that they also organize frequent get togethers and i attended myself. Wonderful to see.

    • @pennycowher6328
      @pennycowher6328 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I'm glad you get to live as a women now and I'm so very sorry that people left you. I would never leave someone bc of that .

  • @fleurhufflepuff2198
    @fleurhufflepuff2198 2 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    Amanda is sooo sweet and emotionally intelligent. Shaye is so vulnerable and honest. I loved this episodes so much!

  • @AubreyJM
    @AubreyJM 2 ปีที่แล้ว +125

    1:00:00 - Shaye shares his deepest fear with Amanda and I LOVE Amanda's reaction. She's completely selfless and asks if he "needs to transition". So sweet. 💞🌈

    • @lady8jane
      @lady8jane 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      That's love, plain and simple.

    • @Mittenmarket
      @Mittenmarket ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I don't understand what he meant. Most of this is over my head.

    • @idontknowmuch3441
      @idontknowmuch3441 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Mittenmarket I don’t know for sure but I think it’s bc he was told when he was young that he will be one of the highest spiritual leaders and he doesn’t feel that he’s on that path. But I don’t know for sure

    • @joymorrison6614
      @joymorrison6614 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I havent listened but does that mean Amanda will be with a man dressed like a woman?

    • @knemetz80
      @knemetz80 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      ​@@joymorrison6614no. It means Amanda will be with a woman, a trans woman.

  • @elizabethwoodyard8241
    @elizabethwoodyard8241 2 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    I think Amanda and Margi are two of the most compassionate people I've ever seen.

  • @ellak1382
    @ellak1382 2 ปีที่แล้ว +89

    I love what Margi said around 2:04:35 about hoping Shaye is feeling more at home. What a beautiful way to put it. I’ve never realised what a privilege I’ve had feeling at home in my body.

  • @AubreyJM
    @AubreyJM 2 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    Amanda is so sincere and such a beautiful example of pure love.

  • @PadawansGuideToTheGalaxy
    @PadawansGuideToTheGalaxy 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    What a power couple. They’re both so educated and respectful towards the LDS faith, but with a healthy dose of skepticism towards church leadership and doctrine. Amanda is so intellectual, loving, and supportive to Shaye, and thank you Shaye for sharing your story!!!

  • @anoriginalcreationx
    @anoriginalcreationx 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I'm in my early 40s and can relate so much to Shaye's story. I found such peace when I learned what Non-Binary meant. It fits so much better for me than woman, female.. like Shaye, it wasn't about wanting to be the opposite, it's about not feeling like you are a binary male or female. I have never felt like a girl.. but I also never felt like I wanted to be the opposite. It's been liberating learning about gender expressions and being able to understand my childhood experiences better knowing I was struggling with gender dysphoria.

  • @yooperskeptic
    @yooperskeptic 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I cried along with Shaye and Amanda when he described telling her that he has gender dysphoria, and she responded by asking if he needed to transition. I was overwhelmed with admiration and awe at Shaye's bravery and vulnerability, and at Amanda's immediate support for him. Two such beautiful people, wow. Shaye, you won't be "the prophet" (oy), but I have no doubt that both of you will continue to do great things, help countless people, and thrive. The ability both of you have to articulate your struggles, deconstruction and reconstruction is so educational. And your children--so lucky to grow up with you as parents! Augh, I'm getting verklempt again. Thank you so much!

  • @dianawilson13
    @dianawilson13 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This is awesome! I am excommunicated mormon and my spouse is transitioning and I couldn't be happier that she is happy in her own skin now!

  • @KristyRadio
    @KristyRadio ปีที่แล้ว +7

    What an absolutely beautiful interview. I am so happy to see Shay and Amanda supporting each other so wonderfully. Amanda, i feel the exact same as you - you love the person ❤

  • @marinao730
    @marinao730 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I have enjoyed this two-part series and would love to hear a follow up.

  • @roxyraber8931
    @roxyraber8931 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Controlling religions are so unnecessary, you two are Gods blessing. Being baptized Mormon, I started studying ONLY the Bible, eventually I was Saved By Grace, released me from all pressure and questionabl teachings. God is Love and a forgiving God . Thank you Shaye and Amanda.

  • @SilentThundersnow
    @SilentThundersnow ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I'm always late to the story, but what a great story! I love The Piano Guys! You two embody love. It's really beautiful! And it's eye opening to see the humanity behind this struggle. Amanda's love for Shaye 'the person,' is inspiring! They should really make a movie based on your story!
    What a great thing Mormon Stories is for the human beings who travel through this space, those who tell their story and those who listen.
    John has carried the 'burden' of this dream for so long, through so many heart wrenching moments of his own. There are times, I'm sure, when faced with extreme criticism for perceived, made up, or real mistakes he's made, he thought he should give up. His story is woven throughout all of these stories he holdis a space for. It must feel like war to him at times. Yet he continues.
    One thing is for sure, John's heart is totally invested in these moments right here. And it wouldn't be the same without him. It wouldn't be as good. It's his gift of love to the world.
    I see his story almost as it's own Mormon Story playing out here and behind the scenes, and what a beautiful story it must be! As he makes space for amazing stories like this, and lives his own story all around it, one thing is for sure, he deserves the compassion and space for being himself and finding himself and making mistakes and growing, that he gives to those who pass through Mormon Stories.
    And Margi, beautiful, caring, light-up the room, Margi. I've sat next to her on a couch at a retreat and spoken with her about myself, and listened to her teach a group of people. I'll never forget her spirit, her essence, her soul that she shares so gracefully. There's nobody who can make you feel more love around them than Margi. It's hard to put in words.
    Thank you to John and Margi and all who share their stories and offer support so John can keep doing this amazing thing for others, while he is living his own story too.

  • @evelyntaylor742
    @evelyntaylor742 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This contained one of the best intellectual discussions I have heard on Mormon Stories. I especially enjoyed it was being led by Amanda and Margi.

  • @jennifersmith7579
    @jennifersmith7579 2 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am a mother of a late onset Trans Woman who is just the most incredible human being.
    I do wish I could experience gender disphoria and also wish that everyone could for just a day even. I ache for my child who felt confused and as an active Mormon mother I had no lexicon to help me see her. I am no longer active. And I'm happy living a life where I feel more fully able to love and honor and be grateful for trans people and the variety and beauty they bring to my once black and white world.
    Nature will always diversify, in every aspect. Creation will seek to express and explore and it is all good, beauty and truth.

    • @Nottacatladee
      @Nottacatladee ปีที่แล้ว +5

      This is a beautifully expressed comment in its entirety but the second half of it struck me as especially profound. Thank you.

    • @richardprice5978
      @richardprice5978 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      it's confusing to me how i/others- 🏳‍🌈 fit in to the religion/doctrine ( yes i still see/LDS-church male gay or predatory sexual activity as a sin ( as is rape-ect a federal crime and should be enforced as im not for predators ) but legally gay's/LGBTQIA+ there in the right in the USA 🇺🇸 and should stay that way! bi&lesbian isn't a sin under marriage to at least one man/male-role ) of the christen faith let alone the LDS faithfulness but for now id rather not leave my beliefs as a scientific-minded and LDS trans/intersexual in a forced male-role/phalloplasty-ect from 4yo-now and not really sure about changing to female/getting my old parts back, like shaye is/mindset as i just spent the last 20-35 years/millennial-generation learning to love myself as is in a husband-role/consequences of my mother-ect actions and forgetting/forgiveness ect

    • @lilasholl1060
      @lilasholl1060 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​❤@@Nottacatladee

    • @lilasholl1060
      @lilasholl1060 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      R3

    • @KwertyKeys
      @KwertyKeys 27 วันที่ผ่านมา

      There’s not an ‘onset’ of being trans. It’s not something one develops symptoms or catches. Trans people know when they’re young,they are different, they just hide it for a long time. It’s such a big thing and frightening to think your family will throw you out, so they hide it. Before the last few years, hardly anyone spoke about it and hardly any would come out. Some people wait for 40-50-60yrs. But felt it since they were 5yrs old, or thereabouts. A lot of trans people never some out, and live whole lives and dii without ever telling anyone. For fear or rejections and stigma and losing everything. In some countries, they’d be klled.
      I knew I liked being a girl and I liked boys when I was about 8, kiss chase in the playground, and I also knew there were special boys in my class too, I didn’t know what. it was called, but I thought ‘he’s like a girl and moves in girly ways’
      I still know them 50yrs later, they are both gay.
      No one catches these, we are just born now we’re born, and when we are heterosexual and happy with our gender, we are lucky that we’re just accepted as the regular norm default versions. The trans people I know always knew, no sudden ‘onset’ feelings out of nowhere, or because it looks ‘fashionable’ now. It isn’t a trend, it’s just that people feel,a bit brave in coming out now

  • @vmcgriff
    @vmcgriff ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Just paused and watched Amanda’s version of Rolling in the Deep with the Piano Guys… Amanda!! Your voice is beautiful!
    Also, Shaye- So inspired by your voice for those who do not fall into the traditional boxes that so many religions want their parishioners to fall in line. They so often do not give room for so many to fit into their version of life and religion! Very emotional and so thankful that with your wife’s support the two of you were able to find a path for you and your family to explore the authentic version of you! ❤

  • @myshavikes6263
    @myshavikes6263 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I am a nonbinary, never Mormon, and I just love watching this podcast. This particular interview was amazing! Shaye is so vulnerable, and I am so happy he's able to step into his truth.
    Amanda! I am so impressed with her knowledge of the queer community, the binary, and internationality.
    These two are so beautiful and the energy between them is so heartwarming.

  • @kylovangool
    @kylovangool 2 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Thank you so much for sharing. As a trans man (with a long time partner) who came out in my late 30s I find Shaye and Amanda’s story very relatable. Powerful story and episode to say the least. I wish Shaye and Amanda all the best on their journey. 💙
    Thank you John and Margi for your allyship and using your platform to share a story such as Shaye and Amanda’s.

  • @carschmn
    @carschmn ปีที่แล้ว +9

    59:09 I told myself when I was 20 that if I wasn’t happy by the time I was 30 that I would transition. I hit 30, I wasn’t any happier, so I transitioned. I’ve been living as a man for 7 years now.

  • @shannandesh
    @shannandesh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    I’ve followed their TH-cam channel for years and saw their “coming out” video! I’m so glad they made their way over here. I look forward to their story

  • @ruthc4458
    @ruthc4458 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Shaye and Amanda are amazing people. I’ve watched their TH-cam videos from the beginning as well as lots of The Piano Guys. You are both so strong, loving and respectful. I wish you and your family the best as you continue your journey.
    Also I really have learned a lot watching Morgan Stories…thx John and company!!

  • @wanwan2180
    @wanwan2180 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    The part where Shaye talked about standing up in church and saying you shouldn't attend gay weddings, but the Bishop disagreeing was very surprising but also very moving, really shows how things aren't just black and white even within the church

  • @brandikirchhoff927
    @brandikirchhoff927 2 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    WOW! Just wow! Thank you so much for sharing. I learned so much and I see you both!
    And to John, having Margi with you as cohost on episodes like this one is so valuable and enriching.

  • @liseklerekoper2441
    @liseklerekoper2441 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This is most definitely my favorite Mormon Stories so far and I think the way this couple expressed themselves and how willing they were to be vulnerable and talk about what needs to have the light shined on it is a gift to so many people they’re going to help.
    Thank you so much for sharing this interview. I love your channel.

  • @angel-astanfield7939
    @angel-astanfield7939 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    "What do I know at all about anything I perceived?" That was perfectly said to describe a paradigm shift in perception when it occurs suddenly. Thank you Amanda.😊❤

  • @taylorb3084
    @taylorb3084 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I’ve been so moved by these two and their stories, their love, their intentionality. So moved. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @msmdare
    @msmdare 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This brings even more understanding of the severe pain my sweet child suffered for too long. Gender dysmorphia is real. He was Learning disabled, Asperger’s, so talented and intelligent. The depression was grave and was such a traumatic thing to live around. I appreciate this interview in such a profound way. What Shay shares are the same self loathing and fear I heard for years. My beloved child ended his life after he began HRT he became psychotic, that was so painful to witness. Love wasn’t enough. I miss him and am grateful there’s no more pain.

    • @msmdare
      @msmdare 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Dysphoria

    • @kelly-annmaddox
      @kelly-annmaddox 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm so sorry for your terrible loss. 💔 Your child sounds like an amazing person who was dealing with so much.

  • @familygrows7627
    @familygrows7627 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Courage is contagious. Thank you for being brave enough to share with the world 🌎

  • @livelovelocalmi
    @livelovelocalmi 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Y'all are amazing people. You are love. ❤ Thank you all for being you. ❤

  • @imboredwhatsnew
    @imboredwhatsnew 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Oh my gosh my heart just soared. When Shaye said “if you’re not hurting someone else, who am I to tell you what is best for you.” 2:07:00 This is word for word my life motto!! Whenever I hear someone speak negatively about the queer community I always say, “how does that affect you? They are just living their life.” Such a subtle point but it’s so true and I think more people need to focus on that when making judgements about others.

  • @LT-op8ik
    @LT-op8ik 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I’m so inspired, thank you all for your vulnerability❤ I really feel like being on this podcast has got to be so therapeutic. To actually be asked what your experience was and why you left. Keep up the great work!

  • @kathleenjbazan5563
    @kathleenjbazan5563 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Wonderful presentation of two beautiful souls, this is just amazing how much I have learned about the Mormon faith. I was raised Catholic, I’ve questioned many things and have concerns with the leaders in our church. I’m not a fan or organized religions anymore but truly believe in Jesus as our God and hope I am being as open to loving others as you guys.

  • @KwertyKeys
    @KwertyKeys 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    This is weird as I only know Shaye as she is now, so this is like her brother or something! Her transformation is amazing, and she looks absolutely beautiful, and they’re still a couple and happy ❤

  • @glittergeek1
    @glittergeek1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I am glad you two stuck together through this. My ex-husband felt he had to marry someone else in the temple to get to the top layer of heaven. By this time I knew the church was a lie, so they instructed him to get a divorce. It was sad but I have been bless since ..... I am on the right road now.

  • @BestFanOfMiley
    @BestFanOfMiley 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    loved hearing about their experience. wishing them all the best. sending all the love

  • @rheajoy4039
    @rheajoy4039 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I’m taking my time listening to both episodes. They are so interesting, so heartwarming.

  • @Kamarca
    @Kamarca ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This was an amazing, informative interview. Well done, all!

    • @mormonstories
      @mormonstories  ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thanks so much!

    • @Kamarca
      @Kamarca ปีที่แล้ว

      @@mormonstories You're welcome! I can't believe how quickly those hours flew-you know it's good content when you are finished but still want to hear more!

  • @sharai73
    @sharai73 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    What a beautiful love story. ❤ thank you both for this I have 7 year old son who is diagnosed with gender dysphoria and autism.
    They have gorgeous long hair an have a bright pink and purple bedroom 100’s of unicorn plushies and a dress-up box full of there favourite Princess’s
    Such happy child that loves their life yet I'm so fearful for the future I hope they find love like you two have ❤🌈

  • @tawnyachristensen7310
    @tawnyachristensen7310 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Such a great interview! I really appreciate the Scotts telling their story, they are both such amazing people. I really appreciate Margi's interviewing skills, she is so thoughtful, kind and empathetic.

  • @AnnaPik89
    @AnnaPik89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    We love you Shaye and Amanda. Thankyou for being brave xo

  • @KarenNZ
    @KarenNZ 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m so so thankful to watch this..many blessing to Shaye and Amanda .. you are both incredible.. One Love 💕

  • @stephanieadams8488
    @stephanieadams8488 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    What beautiful human beings, thank you so much for sharing your story.

  • @The_One_and_Only996
    @The_One_and_Only996 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I really hope the entire Scott family has embraced this couple. I wish you had asked questions about how their extended families reacted

  • @umhewow
    @umhewow 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I love them. It’s so touching to see their love for eachother. Every time he got emotional she’d reach over and grab his hand, or rub his back. Such a sweet couple

    • @Mittenmarket
      @Mittenmarket ปีที่แล้ว +4

      But he almost pulls away from her.

    • @freereinartstudio1463
      @freereinartstudio1463 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Mittenmarket The 'pulling away' or what you think is pulling away could be for a variety of reasons, not all negative so don't put your own spin on it because you can't know.

  • @DoctorJoanieTool
    @DoctorJoanieTool ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So admire this couple for their vulnerability and their honesty.

  • @bmeggy11
    @bmeggy11 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    So many quotes in this interview that are so powerful. I am so impressed with your support and love towards one another. You are beautiful people!

  • @michellee6812
    @michellee6812 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You two are amazing!! Thank you for sharing your experiences. 😘

  • @Mamah11
    @Mamah11 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    So heartwarming that I stayed through to the end. These are long podcasts and I usually can't make it all the way to the end.

  • @angel-astanfield7939
    @angel-astanfield7939 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Wow, you all just blew my mind with the conversation around patriarchal feminism. That was a shift jump for sure. Thanks everyone. ❤

  • @nnacroon7356
    @nnacroon7356 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    "what is the point of this if we're not caring for each other" ❤

  • @kristenreusethematerialgir2995
    @kristenreusethematerialgir2995 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    A million thoughts, barely any words. Thank you for this podcast. Human experience in life is about love. I feel I just took the master class, with this episode.

  • @georgeweatherford1027
    @georgeweatherford1027 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I only now am realizing that while I do not feel wrong in the body I have, I do not internally identify very much as a man as it has always been presented to me. I love this idea that it does not need to be "one way" when you do not feel at home with certain descriptors

  • @ridgebackmomma6261
    @ridgebackmomma6261 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I love these people. After watching, I told my daughter about the episode and reinforced that I love her just the way she is and told her to never allow anyone to tell her who to be. She’s 9. I’m going to tell her this at least once a week so it will become “indoctrinated “ into her.

    • @AnneloesF
      @AnneloesF ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That is such a beautiful intention!

    • @RayneBubble.
      @RayneBubble. ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This may sound odd, but THANK YOU for loving you child, accepting and providing safe space. ♥️

  • @Ms.Laterholmes5253
    @Ms.Laterholmes5253 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Please wrap around each other and the ones that you have manifested to be with each other for this experience. You are here to help each other to listen to each other to communicate with each other to teach your children and educate them to not be ignorant and to be real people and I’m so happy that the two of you have each other, it is truly a beautiful thing and I’m sorry you’re going through this but just know that you are an exceptional being and it makes my heart feel the joy and warm and happiness that you have each other

  • @peace1655
    @peace1655 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Actually your question was answered. You learned that the Mormon doctrine isn't safe, at least it's not the truth as you thought it was. When I listen to you guys, I realized how forceful your awakening was, everything came to you so intensely as if you were jolted to consciousness yet you were ready and open.
    I don't know of anybody who wouldn't be resistant, afraid, consumed by that turbulent chasm yet you decided the foundation of this difficult experience is the conditioning, the false narrative; to deconstruct everything you were thought, unlearn everything to become whole. You guys are blessed to be awaken and supported by the truth.
    I learned a lot from you as I, myself struggling with feeling of unworthiness as an older Haitian Catholic woman. I thank you all, you are a blessing in disguise.

  • @laurel7704
    @laurel7704 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    @greatscotts thank you for sharing your story. I have been trying to learn and understand and listening to you is very helpful.

  • @Slay_slay13
    @Slay_slay13 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Amanda is killin it, they both are ❤ I appreciate this, the opportunity to learn. I have learned so much here. I wish you two and your family all the best, and look forward to hearing how you are later!

  • @kathrynreissauthor
    @kathrynreissauthor ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for an excellent episode. I wish you all the best, Shaye. I will follow your journey with interest and hopes for your family's happiness. And, Amanda, as a fellow English professor, and author of many novels, I LOVED what you said about the value of reading fiction! !

  • @chickenelafsworld7105
    @chickenelafsworld7105 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    While I’ve never been Mormon, as a queer person who grew up in a fundamentalist community, I relate a lot to both Amanda and Shaye, but Shaye especially. Especially the feeling of being unnecessarily cruel or stubborn about queer issues because of internalized hatred is something I’ve had to struggle with too, knowing I’ve said hurtful things because of the fear that validating them would mean accepting I’m queer too. I’m especially happy that Shaye, despite still presenting as man and using he/him as of this point, is still trans, is still trans supportive, and is still part of the community, because that’s still his community in many ways. Sadly it’s really common for people who experience dysphoria and got over it, who detransitioned, or who otherwise don’t feel right away the need to medically or socially transition, to use that against trans people. As if one person having a certain journey means everyone with dysphoria can easily follow that path. It works against care for all the people who have been or are gender non-conforming, who have gender dysphoria, who have transitioned or thought of transitioning. We’re all hurt by the same systems.
    I can relate a lot to experiencing dysphoria most of my but not going on to “transitioning” in the traditional way. Funnily enough, even though in some ways I’m closer to the traditional view of trans people than Shaye (I’ve changed my name and go by all pronouns) in other ways I’m less in the traditional view, such as not taking hrt. I’ve come to understand that my gender can’t be put in a box, because like all gender it’s mostly made up. And that’s okay. I can like or dislike whatever about my body. I can like or dislike any hobbies or fashion or pronouns. It doesn’t dictate what box I should be put in. I’m comfortable at this point in my life with being called a woman, despite being trans and afab, because I’ve processed that being a woman or not doesn’t matter or invalidate my feelings of dysphoria and trauma. Just like I can accept and be comfortable with being called a man, or non-binary, because being those doesn’t invalidate the things I enjoy about womanhood or the experiences I’ve had from it.
    Labels matter to some people, but they don’t have to. For some people a label and a new name and pronouns and medical treatment do a lot, but that isn’t everyone. Transitioning can be helpful for many people, but it doesn’t look the same for everyone. Maybe one day Shaye will go by she/her and identify as a woman, maybe on day I’ll be a hardcore trans man and get top and bottom surgery and hrt. It isn’t a set road. Anyone can be trans, in any way, for any amount of time. What matters is fighting together to make life better for anyone who might experience what we have.
    (Also side note I’m happy for Shaye getting hrt! Especially in the US it can be hit or miss getting hormones, some places it’s really easy *unless* you’re visibly trans and some places it’s only accessible *if* you’re visibly trans)

  • @kristenminer1278
    @kristenminer1278 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I've watched at least 3 of the videos and podcasts about shayes gender dysphoria and both of their experiences in the Mormon church. Your story is beautiful! How and when did you guys come out to your families and how did that go? 💜

  • @jesse1008
    @jesse1008 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    You are so beautiful, my favorite couple on MS ! Thank you for your bravery and being an inspiration to so many people. I was deeply touched by your story

  • @adventuresacrosstheu.s.2685
    @adventuresacrosstheu.s.2685 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Another great interview. Amanda is an angel for her support.

  • @emely.M1
    @emely.M1 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    What a beautiful and amazing interview!!
    I caught myself rewinding some parts because I felt the love, the wisdom and I just wanted take it all in and fully understand it
    Thank you so much for sharing this with all us!

  • @elencosta4659
    @elencosta4659 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful history. It was very inspiring!❤

  • @westieweardogkilts9715
    @westieweardogkilts9715 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    AManda and SHaye you are the greatest couple. Shaye you ROCK!! Thank you for helping me understand better - this will help me with my oldest kid. THANK YOU - all four of you. Blessings!

  • @Cymraesarall
    @Cymraesarall 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Wow! I have learnt so much from this story. Thank you.

  • @ew5301
    @ew5301 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Beautiful story thank you for being so vulnerable.

  • @janpiper9913
    @janpiper9913 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I love this channel. So insightful. I resonate with so much that is being said. My mantra has been unconditional love and live your truth. Thank you to everyone that share. All the best Amanda and Shay 😍

  • @tomweisser6203
    @tomweisser6203 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I absolutely feel that what brings you peace along your journey is right. You are seen,loved and appreciated. I applaud you both for sharing what real love looks like.

  • @arieltaylor3046
    @arieltaylor3046 2 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I would love to see a follow up interview with Shaye and Amanda now that Shaye has transitioned.

  • @Zhaliberty
    @Zhaliberty 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Such an intelligent conversation. Thank you.

  • @paulashealthyliving
    @paulashealthyliving ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I'm so glad I live in Vancouver Canada which has a very accepting culture. I have two friends who have trans children and there was so much information and support available to them as to how to best support their children. I can't imagine that it was easy for the children regardless but having supportive parents must have helped.

    • @HumanimalChannel
      @HumanimalChannel ปีที่แล้ว

      NON AFFIRMING parenting is the only WAY. They are CHILDREN. What is happening in their school? What and who are they watching online? Are the parents mentally stable.

    • @HumanimalChannel
      @HumanimalChannel ปีที่แล้ว

      And, are the children autistic?

  • @gfill100
    @gfill100 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    What an incredible story. I so appreciate their vulnerability with sharing something so deeply personal. I admire their strength and hope that they find peace and healing in their journey ahead.

  • @TheForestCrone
    @TheForestCrone 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I'm so grateful to have you both speaking up for our beautiful trans sons and daughters, sisters and brothers! Lucky for me, I got hooked on a reality series while babysitting my newborn granddaughter, about Jazz Jennings. She was born male and knew as a toddler she was female. Watching her journey taught me a lot so when my granddaughter came out as trans at age 8, there was nothing but unconditional love, acceptance and celebration of his beautiful spirit and bravery. In our family, we see the role of hormones during pregnancy as a likely factor in whether a fetus develops mentally as female or male, regardless of the sex of the body. Maybe this isn't factual, it's just our guess. But it doesn't matter ultimately. We are who we are, we're all worthy of love, and if you're that human being disparaging people you are part of the problem that leads to such a high suicide rate in this population. Please be kind. If you find yourself in a situation with the LGBTQ community and aren't sure how to behave or react, err on the side of love. ETA: I have found so much peace, beauty, love and "heaven" on earth through meditation and allowing myself to just BE. There is so much to be said for allowing yourself to just be alive, to find that inner spaciousness, that inner divine, that inner eternity. The answers are within. "I am" is all I am; everything else is a thought construct which is just so freeing. Thanks again for this! I love hearing people's experiences of leaving behind someone else's thought constructs!

    • @sarab8332
      @sarab8332 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hormones do play a role in the pregnancy. All male fetus's receive a testosterone washing at 6 weeks to masculine the brain or if a female fetus receives to much testosterone, it will masculine their brain. The mother could have been sick, medications she was taking at the time. Also look up DSD babies too, it was a med given to mothers in the 50's and 60's to prevent miscarriages.

  • @duncansonoryan
    @duncansonoryan 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I really appreciate John asking to explain a non traditional trans experience. I'm a trans man who is pretty masculine, and so often some in the trans community try to gate keep what a valid trans experience is.
    Note on my background: gay trans never Mormon, but came out in an Evangelical world on the path to ministry. Managed to salvage my relationship with Jesus with the love presented. Had a former partner who was an ex Mormon who was outed by their bishop.

  • @cararichardson4123
    @cararichardson4123 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This is the most healing interview I've watched on this channel so far. Thank you so much.

  • @Ryan_Keith
    @Ryan_Keith 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I’m so excited for this one!

  • @lizwilkins5566
    @lizwilkins5566 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you both for sharing your story ....it makes me want to continue to learn and to be open to others experiences ❤❤

  • @angelacollins1343
    @angelacollins1343 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much for sharing your stories. They are so enlightening and important.

  • @AubreyJM
    @AubreyJM 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    1:57:00 "going out into the wilderness without a Liahona" ... Rephrased: Your heart is your "Liahona".

  • @rivkahmiri513
    @rivkahmiri513 ปีที่แล้ว

    So much beauty in this story. Thank you! I agree wholeheartedly with both of them! Openness is a gift!

  • @katscheib8332
    @katscheib8332 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I think this is one of the MOST important episodes so far! Loved hearing both stories and can relate so much. It just makes me angry and sad that the norm in not just Mormon culture but society in general is putting people in their stereotypical boxes and making them feel feel like they have to conform or they will be thrown out with the wolves.

  • @notalktoni4096
    @notalktoni4096 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Thank you Shaye and Amanda for your story. I’m polyamory and my boyfriend is FtM. He came out to me a year after we met. I couldn’t imagine life with him any other way. I love to see people not ashamed to speak their stories. Thank you again. ❤

  • @AubreyJM
    @AubreyJM 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    1:37:00 "...what some view as a faith crisis, I view as a faith expansion...some want to keep God in a box..."

    • @davidm4566
      @davidm4566 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Correct. Many want to put God in a box of their own design and desires. It doesn't work that way.

  • @Bareybienesraices
    @Bareybienesraices ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you all for sharing ❤

  • @angelikabehrend417
    @angelikabehrend417 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Some people may love us for who they want us to be. But also, some people love us for who they understand us to be. I'm very glad to see the love between Amanda and Shaye. The judgment of "others" happens only in their heads. Don't make the mistake to identify with it and them. Even they stumble through life as well as possible.

  • @mitchellpope
    @mitchellpope 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I served my mission in Austria, and I can tell you that those members will be thrilled and so thankful to have a Temple closer than 8 hours away! I'm not pro temple personally, but for faithful members who believe that the temple is the closest they will ever get to Heaven on Earth... The Church can afford to build them wherever even just a handful of members will benefit.

  • @megalantern13
    @megalantern13 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    IVF never worked for us. Mother's Day, family reunions, ... are still painful.

  • @PetsNPatients
    @PetsNPatients 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Beautiful love, in any skin. I am, who I am, is what I hear. Your children will always have you as their parents.

  • @rkeller8141
    @rkeller8141 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    God is love and he completely loves us, I have read for years, but slowly forgot it as I focused on my problems, single, gay and old. I had lost sight of a God who loves me and everyone unconditionally and instead was severely hating myself. Coming out of a serious depression that gave me an understanding why people end it. I believe it was a gift, because it has reset my brain. My battle is to remember and live in God’s love. The enemy of God’s creation wants us to believe God is angry, vindictive and would prefer that we be miserable. Not true because its the language of the fall. (Ann Voskamp) from her book, (One Thousand Gifts), 1. Discontentment, 2. Self Condemnation, 3. Critical eye, 4. Never satisfied. Is the ongoing language of a fallen race. The book, One Thousand Gifts, I found in a free box. 1. through 4. had been my daily mantra and practicing that daily caused me to be closer to suicide than I’ve ever been. I had forgotten to be grateful to and for a loving God, first for my salvation and Christ dying for me to save me from my sins. In the state of depression, I could barely walk or think and was contemplating help, even use psychedelics, but finally arrived at a safe seashore. The book reminded me not to walk ungratefully, open my eyes in his beautiful creation, and what a difference it’s made for me. There is beauty all around for us to see and appreciate and be grateful for, without his condemnation or mine. My sick brain is healing and grateful that I can lift my head, and see again. I look for reminders that He’s with me daily and glad to be aware of the ungrateful gorilla that is angry because his life isn’t normal. Thank you Shaye and Amanda, your honesty and coming forward to share your journey with all of us is awe inspiring.

    • @davidm4566
      @davidm4566 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      God loves us and is also a holy.
      People tend to either view him as lovey-dovey and weak or angry and unable to be pleased.
      God is a balance that wants us to all come to him and makes a way to do this through Jesus despite all of our sins.

  • @cherylduncan5158
    @cherylduncan5158 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    This episode has touched my heart so much❤

  • @ethantufts3591
    @ethantufts3591 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The Brick Wall is FAKE?!... this is just like that "There is no fridge, I lied" video. Im traumatized

  • @AyakoTachi
    @AyakoTachi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    1:57:45 this interview comes together

  • @AnneloesF
    @AnneloesF ปีที่แล้ว +2

    That was beautiful to listen to. Thank you

  • @belindabeurrier5540
    @belindabeurrier5540 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Shaye, you are an amazing man. Thank you for sharing your story. Big hugs for all of you ❤️