True. This needs to be addressed. Many/most young men are “incels” (whether they admit it or not, due to embarrassment/shame/appearing-unattractive) and access to a sexual partner can be extremely difficult to attain. Trish may have difficulty understanding this, as (young) women hardly ever struggle with this, and older women are often already partnered up or had kids.
I'm 76 - I agree with someone else here that your films are ALL geared to (mostly younger) men who have partners ! I do what I do because i have no partner - and at my age am unlikely to find one. I don't feel "ashamed" about looking at pornography, visiting working girls or strip clubs - its there to be enjoyed - I'm not letting anyone down - I i love it !
Has your erection improved significantly since you stopped. Did it go back to the normal state of how it used to be before you started the habit of masturbation?
Wow. You're amazing and you've great amount of self control. Please could you share your process of how you accomplished that. May be it will help some people including myself ☺️
Thank you, Dr. Leigh, you hit the nail on the head with how porn ruins relationship, my relationship ended and your description of how porn creats attraction problems speaks directly to what I went through, and previous relationships, it was all my fault and I didn't even see it
This type of addiction is similar to hard drug addiction in terms of withdrawal symptoms, bouts of anger and depression abound, triggers such as simply showering or scratching an itch can literally set off urges, watching even the slightest innuendo scene on TV can set things off, it's no joke when your brain has been wired for this awful addiction for decades, it's just a taboo topic for many. The worst part is the days of guilt that comes from relapse failure , all because of a few seconds of pleasure. Your basically pushing the metaphorical boulder up a hill with this problem, but the psychological establishment still won't classify this as something to be taken seriously.
Yep yep yep yep. 100% yep. When I realized I had a compulsive problem, it put me on a road to recover. Which ment: dealing with past trauma, learning how to deal with triggers, and dysregulation, as well as establishing new healthy habits. Long road, but Ive already spent decades in this addiction. I have no more time or place in my life for things that harm me more than help me. MASTERBATION IS NOT NECESSARY GUYS. Get over it. It most likely only holding you back. Thanks as always Dr.
@GrassRoots1980 You couldn’t said it better. Thank you the comment and encouragement to know that I’m not alone in this. Good luck im your healing journey. 🙏🏼
How could anyone in the freaking solar system perceive you as unqualified to expound upon a "Man's problem". Everything I've EVER heard you say has been 1000% on point. Your education and utterly masterful delivery (for me at least) quickly rendered the fact that you're a lady insignificant. This was one of you longer ones and quite possibly your finest hour. ✌MORE MORE MORE!
"Lived experience" nonsense. Lot of sheep hopped on the non-intellectual bandwagon of that kind of thinking. You have to be what you're talking about to be qualified LOL.
After watching Dr. Trish lee videos i controlled my self about 4 months without watching porn and masturbation easily. But again i started yes this will take time and hardwork to overcome this habit that is built a long long years ago still i am trying and i will. Never ever give up.
😮... OMG?!?! This information is mind-blowing; using it as self soothing therapeutic means to deal with uncomfortable or chaotic emotions?? Happen around the same time realizing that my mother's new marriage was severely dysfunctional... 😮
Yes I'm in fact a woman! 😅 That line was hilarious. To be honest with you a doctor I have seen a bunch of people talk about masturbation and you are the only one so far that has kept me interested. You stick to the point and give real a scenarios without so much unnecessary talk
This is so so SO important! I’ve been on this PMO free path since last year and exactly like Dr Trish said in the beginning, I have actually found leaving porn behind the easiest part of this! Masturbating is somehow trickier, it’s a grey area in this journey that I’ve teased myself back and forth about with the occasional indulgence over the course of my recovery to the detriment of myself. When I first discovered porn I masturbated for the first time. My compulsive sexuality is made up of those two components. I think of porn and masturbation as two sides of the same coin. If you want to make the most of this then you have to dispose of the WHOLE coin, not just one side of it! You can’t just say to yourself, “oh I’ll get rid of heads but I’ll keep tails just in case I need it.” Thank you for your work Dr, it’s had such a good impact on my life and I pray for further success coming both our ways!
Wow.... that end story about being snappy with the wife is spot on. I realized the same thing with myself. I would be less patient and more frustrated for about a half a day. Definitely self-hate and guilt making me lash out.
After listening to some of doctor Trish's video I realise now that my two failed marriages are possibly my fault and not the fault of my partners. I am 58 now and not much chance of finding another but at least I can work on being a better me for the last couple of decades of my life.
I am fully committed to leaving porn behind. But I struggle with not self pleasuring a few times a week. I live alone and dont have a partner and won't for a long time. So what now?
It's hard to imagine that masturbation without porn is bad. It's natural and normal and healthy. If you're resisting an urge that is natural (not from an addiction) how could resisting be a good thing? This almost sounds like a religious argument.
There was a time where I made the conscious decision of if I didn't get sex I was going to masturbate to satisfy my needs and eventually that decision over took everything up to the point as where I kind of stop caring about whether I had sex or not because I stopped pursuing it and doing and it intense of actually getting it
Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Life living is about discipline. We all have the ability to self-discipline but many fall away and take the road most traveled. Pornography is the root of unhappiness. It slowly kills off your soul; exactly how Satan likes it. Guilt, shame and the inability to self-discipline yourself. Though not perfect, I mostly stayed away from porn growing up and still to this day but…if I see something that is sexual, the first look is free but the second…that’s the one gets most men. The second look. The lust must be satisfied mentality. Stay close to the Lord instead. Seek a life-long partner so you don’t have to watch other people having sex.
What I take from this is that the issue is not porn/masturbation itself, is the sense of guilt generated from doing it. So it seems to me that it boils down to either stop doing that altogether or find the way to keep doing it without creating that sense of guilt.
No, because guilt is only one of the negative aspects. Even though you'd keep the guilt at distance there are many other physical and psychological traps.
the sense of guilt is from the person doing it feeling guilty. If people encouraged masturbation, then the ones who felt guilty would be those who don't masturbate. Guilt is an internally created feeling that derives from how a person feel about their actions if they thought society might become aware of what they do. If they believed the general public didn't care that they masturbate or supported it, then they wouldn't feel guilty. I'm a person who encourages it and with those who I provide encouragement and who encourage me, there is no guilt, embarrassment, or shame because we masturbate. I've taken many courses, read many books from different perspectives on masturbation and because I've developed how I do it, and now I'm actually proud of how well, how often, how long I do it. I feel this way because I became aware that 99% of all people masturbate. If they say they don't they are lying. There may be a very small percentage of people who really don't, and I only feel sadness for them because they are throwing away a gift that was given to our species. We are equipped with our hands immediately next to our genitals and the ability to feel pleasure when we touch ourselves. That is rare in nature and the signs that God gave us a true gift.
The elephant in the room is that self pleasuring is its own self reward. It's a tricky idea that we should disqualify pleasure that is at our disposal with pleasure that is governed by some ideology. We may be 'beating' a dead horse.
Why do some great pleasures harm us so? Perhaps because it's then, when our guard is down, and we're too distracted, from the harm being done, to stop it. Like being tickled while being pushed off a cliff.
Trish, Would you say guilt is a way the mind can allow itself to do things, and to go places it knows it shouldn't, (a bit like how, for example, certain religions allow certain behaviours, provided you confess/atone, for your 'sins' - I'm a 'devout atheist', so don't have that outlet for guilt, but find myself in a perpetual state of guilt, even when I may not have been guilty of anything!) Do you often come across these thought processes, in many of the people you work with? Great video!!👍
I know about eneagram ... I am type one ... but I have seen some reports online saying the eneagram was never proven scientificially so we might just be fooling ourselves ... even though it sounds very realistic when we read about our type ... I realize now why your advice sounds to good to my mind - I always vibed great with how type 5 think and explain stuff ... one of my best friend is also a type 5 and he just loves hoarding money while I just live a minimalistic lifestyle lol
hope you read these comments i was looking into your programs and saw they were very pricey for someone on social security could you possibly do a video and let people know if theres an option to get this paid by insurance maybe we could chat by email or something ive watched a few out here and i think your the best
This doesn't really make sense to me. So if I masturbate three times a day (no porn, just sensation and thoughts) all these bad things happen. But if I have sex with my girlfriend three times a day, none of these negative neurological changes occur? What's the difference? (I understand why porn is damaging, that's not what I'm talking about).
Because it is a dopamine flood whereas sex with a partner is dopamine, serotonin. And oxytocin they balance each other out..whereas dopamine flood without the other two balancing it your brain seeks that high like a drug
ahh have ijured myself and penis more with sex with females than with masturbation. happens too animals too. masturbation can be safer than real sex habits/ life.
I've masturbated for many years and never felt good about it. I'm trying to stop but it's not easy. There are so many videos that say theres no evidence that masturbation is bad for but is there any evidence that it's actually good for you?
There's a lot of mis information out there when it comes to sex, porn, and masturbation. I encourage you to explore yourbrainonporn.com! A lot of great resources there
Instead of focusing on people who masturbate, why don't we talk about the problems that result from those who believe sex is always the better option, such as consequences resulting from premarital sex and extra marital sex, excessive divorce rate for those who feel rushed to have a partner, family problems that second marriages bring, alcoholism, unwanted pregnances, etc.? Could it be that people feel extra shame from maturbating because society has stigmatized it? There are many more issues that many people don't talk about. Perhaps some who masturbate don't want to rush and remarry when they need their finacial resources and extra time for raising children as a single parent. Perhaps people who masturbate don't want to be tempted to the point of being unable to resist having premarital sex and feel that masturbation is the lesser of the two evils. Even if masturbation causes erectile disfunction, is that so terrible? After all that might be less harmful to society because fewer men may not feel compelled to impose their sexual urges on unwilling victims. How should disabled people cope with depression from not being able to have sex due to horrifying accidental injuries or severe dirth defects? How should older senior citizens cope with sexual feelings when they are too old to feel the desire or ability to have sex with a partner? Then what about the current married population? Are they without axiety, depression or mood swing issues? Even some married partners become addicted to normal sex. This is why some seek to have more sex than what their partners are able or willing to give. Doesn't this also lead to extra marital affairs, which lead to divorce and even more addiction and emotional illness later? Perhaps some feel masturbation, while being perceived as dirty and shameful, may in the end help to restrain or hold back many of the negative issues that are created by the stigmatism and shame imposed by those who are married and were raised in a hyper conservative lifestyles. I'm not saying all this to condone masturbation personally. I'm only trying to show the other issues involved.
Dr Leigh, if i have been doing this addiction since i am 15, how will i teach my brain to regulate if my brain has known this all my life. I want to quit.
I'm configured weirdly. I don't have any guilt from any action I take in private. I have guilt from having libido though, and acting in private temporarily lowers my libido, helping me feel less guilty about it. So oddly, there is an emotional incentive to do this, especially if I'm going to have to be out in public or somewhere that could trigger the feelings.
Thank you for another FANTASTIC & INFORMATIVE video. I totally understand the Secret Sex Life issue and your definitions and explanations are crystal clear!
I am only sure of one thing Is easily to end in a bad relationship with someone that is not good enough, but you are obligue to stay there, passing through the years without enjoying anything and living a frustrating live So I rather prefer spend my limited time of youthfulness, and enjoying a lot, cause my libido unfortunately will not last forever
@@nmc5657 thank you I'm just trying to find the strength to put my life back together it can be so painful going through, just me alone facing my battle
@7:04 you suggest that someone casually discovers masturbation and then never goes back to it? That is absurd. There is no such thing, but overall your points are good. thank you.
had to do it for releif when ahh got gout- acid came out zero sperm. also in my 66 years have had humans demand sex from me. - after been injured and put on invalids benefit in 2009 ahh have too tell humans ahh zero sex machine.
Thank you for helping me give up porn. It's only been two weeks but my sex life is remarkable. My wife even commented on my performance. I had a hunger for the real thing.
Why is it that whenever a man single? Or critical with women? The question is asserted “Who hurt you? As if being single and not chasing tail is out of the ordinary. As if being about me to learn from the bad relationships of peers, or people online and voting I be aware is wrong think. Why is it that people assume that if you masturbate even semi frequently then you have to be coping? It’s not. It feels damn good. Relieves most forms of stress for me and it’s better than any supplements or over the counter. All natural .
Many people masterbate without watching Porn. So, the issue has little to do with Porn. Sex addiction is not confined to masterbation and includes having frquent sex with a partner. But she is only concerned about Porn and masterbation.
Hi doc! Your content is very interesting to me. I AM aware that my porn&masturbation is a sef-medicating habit. My wife of 42 years doesn't mind my habit and is quite aware of it, partly because sex is not necessary to her. IF I want a deeper sexual connection again with my wife, did I understand you to say that my sexual relationship with my wife cannot reach the huge gratification/reward that the release of sexual tension gives me through porn&masturbation? I value a renewed relationship with my wife more than my own gratification.
LOL, until recently I hadn't realized that Mario updated his favorite way to tackle ED and it's a relief! Although what he previously suggested was pretty good, it was a real pain to follow... I just go'ogled the latest in Volpstein's Erections at Will, it's so much simpler and potent now!
Thank you Dr. Trish. IDK if youre still reading comments after a year, but wanted to give you a little feedback and share my experience. Ive regularly masturbated to porn for many years maybe every day or other day. After watching a few of your videos I decided to make some changes and try a few things. I was able to cut porn but not masturbation. I was able to reduce masturbation down to maybe twice a week however. I still apparently have some dysfunction because for example, after 4 days abstinence, the urges were so strong Id have 3 full hours where I couldnt stop feeling the need to release and could barely concentrate on anything else for that whole time. I considered whether this was "the hijacker" doing this, but the feelings were coming from my libido and not my mind. When I finally got home, contemplating the incredible release, it then took me almost 30 minutes to orgasm, which by most standards is an eternity. So I clearly still have a dysfunction. I think the important thing for me to remember in this is if Im working to make improvements in my sex life to not let guilt/shame dominate any perceived failures. And what I first decided was a failure realized it wasnt actually a failure but simply my body reaching its physical limits. I feel good now and no guilt that Ive stopped porn, started looking away from scantily clad women and generally worked to focus my thoughts away from sex, and significantly reduced the amount of times I masturbate. I still suffer from some dysfunction but again maintain focus on my progress. Any guilt and disappointment is now gone which was a big part of my problem. I do hope eventually to find a sex partner or more, but circumstances will tend to prohibit that for some time until my life gets together.
she says you feel guilty about it because of ur belief system. but then doesnt talk about the beleif system and how to change it. she just says talk either talk to your partner or stop masterbating. a lot of people masterbate and they dont have issues. so shouldnt it be change ur beleif system and then you wont struggle?
I don’t know about constipation but it definitely affects your cognitive function such as memory by overstimulation and long term overstimulation destroys your memory and may cause brain fog it can make you dumb as a rock if done obsessively.
@@Max4Z masturbation is bad during and after recovery. The whole idea is too eventually break the addiction cycle to build a better you that’s what Dr.Trish is helping people with.
When I’m with my wife and family, I feel awful about my porn and masturbation habits. But let me have a day off when nobody is around and it’s open season. I call it “ wicked Wednesday” since it’s normally my day off.😅
Has your erection improved significantly since you stopped. Did it go back to the normal state of how it used to be before you started the habit of masturbation?
Why using masturbation in the morning to help you get active or at night to bring yourself back down is considered a dependecy? Wouldn't it also be drinking a coffee in the morning or drinking wine/watching tv at night considered dependencies? why are those not considered as detrimental? I would argue giving yourself pleasure at night is healthier than watching TV...
What if you are a female n not married n never were married because 0f your Catholic religion you stayed single n your mother kept drilling don't get married don't have kids
That’s right, until recently I hadn't realized that Mario updated his favorite way to tackle ED and it's a relief! Although what he previously suggested was pretty good, it was a real pain to follow... I just go'ogled the latest in Mario’s Thunderous Erections, it's so much easier and potent now!
You refer to a long-term habit of masturbation as being a compulsive disorder of people who suffer from hypersexuality. Please explain, because those are very strong terms that usually apply when sexual urges are uncontrollable and interfere negatively with a person's overall life. For instance, what used to be called nymphomania and is now called female hypersexuality is extreme promiscuity, which is highly risky, compulsive, and destructive to normal relationships. Unless masturbation prevents someone from going to work and having healthy relationships or leads to public indecency, I am sure that it is NOT compulsive hypersexuality. This kind of misclassification is only going to cause greater guilt unnecessarily. You might as well say that having a long-term, regular sexual relationship with a partner is compulsive hypersexuality. Why not?
It’s a nightmare I wish I never watched that crap. My urethra is in constant discomfort for 4 weeks now I’m terrified I quit for good but I’m worried the damage is already done I’m so scared. I’m seeing a urologist soon I really hope I get a second chance I’m so scared 😱
It’s easy for me because I irritated my urethra if I knew that was a risk I would have never masturbated it’s horrible man constant discomfort in the penis I mean constant it’s worse than a nightmare it’s horrible my life has turned upside down I pray God forgives me and heals me and enlightens the urologist to help me and then never again. I don’t even care about sex I just want this discomfort to go away. It’s torture
A Trish video a day keeps the urges away!
Love this!!!!
100% agree with you man!
It seems like you are dependent on her 😅
@Vwerlg why did you watch the video??
@@infiniteawaken1 To learn more; as I love learning. Of course I'm on my own journey as well 13 days now 😎🔥
Practically all of these videos are geared towards people with partners. There are A LOT of people out here without partners, especially these days!!!
Same applies, single or not.
True. This needs to be addressed. Many/most young men are “incels” (whether they admit it or not, due to embarrassment/shame/appearing-unattractive) and access to a sexual partner can be extremely difficult to attain. Trish may have difficulty understanding this, as (young) women hardly ever struggle with this, and older women are often already partnered up or had kids.
I used to put a bag of chicken livers in the microwave for 30 seconds. Heaven.
@@redtree732 Victim Support- sean O'Dwyer- 136- 140 Hobson Street.- Auckland 1010.- new Zealand. South pacific.''
Doesn’t mean that same habit isn’t ruining a person’s capacity to even find a healthy relationship to begin with
I'm 76 - I agree with someone else here that your films are ALL geared to (mostly younger) men who have partners ! I do what I do because i have no partner - and at my age am unlikely to find one. I don't feel "ashamed" about looking at pornography, visiting working girls or strip clubs - its there to be enjoyed - I'm not letting anyone down - I i love it !
Today is day 599 for me. I thought about throwing away my streak, but I kept on with it.
Tomorrow will be a milestone day.
Has your erection improved significantly since you stopped. Did it go back to the normal state of how it used to be before you started the habit of masturbation?
hoorraaahhh
Wow. You're amazing and you've great amount of self control. Please could you share your process of how you accomplished that. May be it will help some people including myself ☺️
@@saacidhussein4655 I hit 601 days. Now im starting over.
@@nazcarcup what happend?
The piece of information I've been searching for desperately for 15years😭
Thank you, Dr. Leigh, you hit the nail on the head with how porn ruins relationship, my relationship ended and your description of how porn creats attraction problems speaks directly to what I went through, and previous relationships, it was all my fault and I didn't even see it
No doubt! Self pleasuring is not your best self ! Great cast .. many are now convinced! Thnx Dr Leigh
This type of addiction is similar to hard drug addiction in terms of withdrawal symptoms, bouts of anger and depression abound, triggers such as simply showering or scratching an itch can literally set off urges, watching even the slightest innuendo scene on TV can set things off, it's no joke when your brain has been wired for this awful addiction for decades, it's just a taboo topic for many.
The worst part is the days of guilt that comes from relapse failure , all because of a few seconds of pleasure. Your basically pushing the metaphorical boulder up a hill with this problem, but the psychological establishment still won't classify this as something to be taken seriously.
Fully agree... u missed mood swings, anxiety, panic, brain fog, insomnia as other main symptoms
True
@@jaypalnitkar4400 insomnia is a real and common symptom for me
You literally describe it perfectly. You become Sisyphus if you’re not careful.
Truest comment i read in a long time
Yep yep yep yep. 100% yep. When I realized I had a compulsive problem, it put me on a road to recover. Which ment: dealing with past trauma, learning how to deal with triggers, and dysregulation, as well as establishing new healthy habits. Long road, but Ive already spent decades in this addiction. I have no more time or place in my life for things that harm me more than help me. MASTERBATION IS NOT NECESSARY GUYS. Get over it. It most likely only holding you back. Thanks as always Dr.
Can I go back to the way I was when I was young if I abstain permanently from masturbation whereby I can get hard almost immediately after orgasms.
@GrassRoots1980
You couldn’t said it better. Thank you the comment and encouragement to know that I’m not alone in this. Good luck im your healing journey. 🙏🏼
so do u just do kegels exercise?
@@timothywade9618 What exactly were you hoping to accomplish with a response like that? To disprove or condemn the OP's road to recovery?
If you replace masturbation with sex, if sex is compulsive, it is bad too. But haven't seen anyone talking about this often
Miss Dr. You know more about man than we man know about our sex life and problems, thanks for sharing informative knowledge
How could anyone in the freaking solar system perceive you as unqualified to expound upon a "Man's problem". Everything I've EVER heard you say has been 1000% on point. Your education and utterly masterful delivery (for me at least) quickly rendered the fact that you're a lady insignificant. This was one of you longer ones and quite possibly your finest hour. ✌MORE MORE MORE!
"Lived experience" nonsense. Lot of sheep hopped on the non-intellectual bandwagon of that kind of thinking. You have to be what you're talking about to be qualified LOL.
I want to see research studies that back up her ridiculous views. Masterbating is harmless.
It’s not a man’s problem women go through this to but yes more men go through it
After watching Dr. Trish lee videos i controlled my self about 4 months without watching porn and masturbation easily. But again i started yes this will take time and hardwork to overcome this habit that is built a long long years ago still i am trying and i will. Never ever give up.
Did you significant improvement in your erection in that 4 months?. Like did it normalize?
@@footballreview6621 I would also like to know this
4 months is incredible by the way
so do you watch burqa porn 😅
forget the haters not everyone is ready i think you talk very professionally
Thank you my friend
So true U hide and seek help with stopping
So can you do it in moderatiom and not in fantasy @@DrTrishLeigh
😮... OMG?!?!
This information is mind-blowing; using it as self soothing therapeutic means to deal with uncomfortable or chaotic emotions??
Happen around the same time realizing that my mother's new marriage was severely dysfunctional... 😮
Yes I'm in fact a woman! 😅
That line was hilarious.
To be honest with you a doctor I have seen a bunch of people talk about masturbation and you are the only one so far that has kept me interested. You stick to the point and give real a scenarios without so much unnecessary talk
Trish - I like the fact you talk about these topics-
This is so so SO important! I’ve been on this PMO free path since last year and exactly like Dr Trish said in the beginning, I have actually found leaving porn behind the easiest part of this! Masturbating is somehow trickier, it’s a grey area in this journey that I’ve teased myself back and forth about with the occasional indulgence over the course of my recovery to the detriment of myself.
When I first discovered porn I masturbated for the first time. My compulsive sexuality is made up of those two components. I think of porn and masturbation as two sides of the same coin. If you want to make the most of this then you have to dispose of the WHOLE coin, not just one side of it! You can’t just say to yourself, “oh I’ll get rid of heads but I’ll keep tails just in case I need it.”
Thank you for your work Dr, it’s had such a good impact on my life and I pray for further success coming both our ways!
Wow.... that end story about being snappy with the wife is spot on. I realized the same thing with myself. I would be less patient and more frustrated for about a half a day. Definitely self-hate and guilt making me lash out.
After listening to some of doctor Trish's video I realise now that my two failed marriages are possibly my fault and not the fault of my partners. I am 58 now and not much chance of finding another but at least I can work on being a better me for the last couple of decades of my life.
I am fully committed to leaving porn behind. But I struggle with not self pleasuring a few times a week. I live alone and dont have a partner and won't for a long time. So what now?
It's hard to imagine that masturbation without porn is bad. It's natural and normal and healthy. If you're resisting an urge that is natural (not from an addiction) how could resisting be a good thing? This almost sounds like a religious argument.
You are right!
This communication is mind-blowing accurate and very helpful! Ty Ty Ty!
I would love to hear you interview Dr. Chris Palmer who wrote the book Brain Energy.
There was a time where I made the conscious decision of if I didn't get sex I was going to masturbate to satisfy my needs and eventually that decision over took everything up to the point as where I kind of stop caring about whether I had sex or not because I stopped pursuing it and doing and it intense of actually getting it
Not sure Dr. Rena Malik would agree with this information?
Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.
i.e. religious mumbo jumbo.
I completely believe what your saying , you are a 100 percent correct
Life living is about discipline. We all have the ability to self-discipline but many fall away and take the road most traveled. Pornography is the root of unhappiness. It slowly kills off your soul; exactly how Satan likes it. Guilt, shame and the inability to self-discipline yourself. Though not perfect, I mostly stayed away from porn growing up and still to this day but…if I see something that is sexual, the first look is free but the second…that’s the one gets most men. The second look. The lust must be satisfied mentality. Stay close to the Lord instead. Seek a life-long partner so you don’t have to watch other people having sex.
What I take from this is that the issue is not porn/masturbation itself, is the sense of guilt generated from doing it. So it seems to me that it boils down to either stop doing that altogether or find the way to keep doing it without creating that sense of guilt.
No, because guilt is only one of the negative aspects. Even though you'd keep the guilt at distance there are many other physical and psychological traps.
the sense of guilt is from the person doing it feeling guilty. If people encouraged masturbation, then the ones who felt guilty would be those who don't masturbate. Guilt is an internally created feeling that derives from how a person feel about their actions if they thought society might become aware of what they do. If they believed the general public didn't care that they masturbate or supported it, then they wouldn't feel guilty. I'm a person who encourages it and with those who I provide encouragement and who encourage me, there is no guilt, embarrassment, or shame because we masturbate. I've taken many courses, read many books from different perspectives on masturbation and because I've developed how I do it, and now I'm actually proud of how well, how often, how long I do it. I feel this way because I became aware that 99% of all people masturbate. If they say they don't they are lying. There may be a very small percentage of people who really don't, and I only feel sadness for them because they are throwing away a gift that was given to our species. We are equipped with our hands immediately next to our genitals and the ability to feel pleasure when we touch ourselves. That is rare in nature and the signs that God gave us a true gift.
The elephant in the room is that self pleasuring is its own self reward. It's a tricky idea that we should disqualify pleasure that is at our disposal with pleasure that is governed by some ideology. We may be 'beating' a dead horse.
Great topic participation required
Can running , workingout and excerise help release same dopamine without resorting to m@sterbation ?
SPAMMERS STOP SPAMMING!!! People come here for help and support. GO AWAY!!
Hi.
I think he's gotta a point
Why do some great pleasures harm us so? Perhaps because it's then, when our guard is down, and we're too distracted, from the harm being done, to stop it. Like being tickled while being pushed off a cliff.
Trish,
Would you say guilt is a way the mind can allow itself to do things, and to go places it knows it shouldn't, (a bit like how, for example, certain religions allow certain behaviours, provided you confess/atone, for your 'sins' - I'm a 'devout atheist', so don't have that outlet for guilt, but find myself in a perpetual state of guilt, even when I may not have been guilty of anything!)
Do you often come across these thought processes, in many of the people you work with?
Great video!!👍
An atheist can still be poisoned by religion.
I know about eneagram ... I am type one ... but I have seen some reports online saying the eneagram was never proven scientificially so we might just be fooling ourselves ... even though it sounds very realistic when we read about our type ... I realize now why your advice sounds to good to my mind - I always vibed great with how type 5 think and explain stuff ... one of my best friend is also a type 5 and he just loves hoarding money while I just live a minimalistic lifestyle lol
hope you read these comments i was looking into your programs and saw they were very pricey for someone on social security could you possibly do a video and let people know if theres an option to get this paid by insurance maybe we could chat by email or something ive watched a few out here and i think your the best
Email jamie@drtrishleigh.com and we'll see what we can do for you my friend
Thank you doctor 🙏💪🌅
Are u also doing private counselling sessions regarding this topic?
This doesn't really make sense to me. So if I masturbate three times a day (no porn, just sensation and thoughts) all these bad things happen. But if I have sex with my girlfriend three times a day, none of these negative neurological changes occur? What's the difference? (I understand why porn is damaging, that's not what I'm talking about).
Because it is a dopamine flood whereas sex with a partner is dopamine, serotonin. And oxytocin they balance each other out..whereas dopamine flood without the other two balancing it
your brain seeks that high like a drug
ahh have ijured myself and penis more with sex with females than with masturbation. happens too animals too. masturbation can be safer than real sex habits/ life.
I've masturbated for many years and never felt good about it. I'm trying to stop but it's not easy. There are so many videos that say theres no evidence that masturbation is bad for but is there any evidence that it's actually good for you?
There's a lot of mis information out there when it comes to sex, porn, and masturbation. I encourage you to explore yourbrainonporn.com! A lot of great resources there
@@DrTrishLeigh Thanks, I will.
Yes it is
Instead of focusing on people who masturbate, why don't we talk about the problems that result from those who believe sex is always the better option, such as consequences resulting from premarital sex and extra marital sex, excessive divorce rate for those who feel rushed to have a partner, family problems that second marriages bring, alcoholism, unwanted pregnances, etc.? Could it be that people feel extra shame from maturbating because society has stigmatized it? There are many more issues that many people don't talk about. Perhaps some who masturbate don't want to rush and remarry when they need their finacial resources and extra time for raising children as a single parent. Perhaps people who masturbate don't want to be tempted to the point of being unable to resist having premarital sex and feel that masturbation is the lesser of the two evils. Even if masturbation causes erectile disfunction, is that so terrible? After all that might be less harmful to society because fewer men may not feel compelled to impose their sexual urges on unwilling victims. How should disabled people cope with depression from not being able to have sex due to horrifying accidental injuries or severe dirth defects? How should older senior citizens cope with sexual feelings when they are too old to feel the desire or ability to have sex with a partner? Then what about the current married population? Are they without axiety, depression or mood swing issues? Even some married partners become addicted to normal sex. This is why some seek to have more sex than what their partners are able or willing to give. Doesn't this also lead to extra marital affairs, which lead to divorce and even more addiction and emotional illness later? Perhaps some feel masturbation, while being perceived as dirty and shameful, may in the end help to restrain or hold back many of the negative issues that are created by the stigmatism and shame imposed by those who are married and were raised in a hyper conservative lifestyles. I'm not saying all this to condone masturbation personally. I'm only trying to show the other issues involved.
Dr Leigh, if i have been doing this addiction since i am 15, how will i teach my brain to regulate if my brain has known this all my life. I want to quit.
I'm configured weirdly. I don't have any guilt from any action I take in private. I have guilt from having libido though, and acting in private temporarily lowers my libido, helping me feel less guilty about it. So oddly, there is an emotional incentive to do this, especially if I'm going to have to be out in public or somewhere that could trigger the feelings.
Thanks Dr. Trish.
Thank you for another FANTASTIC & INFORMATIVE video. I totally understand the Secret Sex Life issue and your definitions and explanations are crystal clear!
Excellent video and thanks for the help/support
I am only sure of one thing
Is easily to end in a bad relationship with someone that is not good enough, but you are obligue to stay there, passing through the years without enjoying anything and living a frustrating live
So I rather prefer spend my limited time of youthfulness, and enjoying a lot, cause my libido unfortunately will not last forever
I had a relapse today after 2weeks of staying away from porn and masturbation suddenly the urge comes back again I'm not really happy right now doctor
Don’t give up.
@@nmc5657 thank you I'm just trying to find the strength to put my life back together it can be so painful going through, just me alone facing my battle
Your a great woman that's great at helping, thank you Your also Gorgeous ❤
@7:04 you suggest that someone casually discovers masturbation and then never goes back to it? That is absurd. There is no such thing, but overall your points are good. thank you.
Never abused alcoholic or substance abuser, but I just can’t shake masturbation. I hate it and think it’s gross, and on the other hand I love it.
Thanks for the awareness Doc you’re amazing
You're the one that's putting making people feel bad about it not everybody feels bad about it
had to do it for releif when ahh got gout- acid came out zero sperm. also in my 66 years have had humans demand sex from me. - after been injured and put on invalids benefit in 2009 ahh have too tell humans ahh zero sex machine.
Right!! She's a nutter and probably never gets any
Thank you for helping me give up porn. It's only been two weeks but my sex life is remarkable. My wife even commented on my performance. I had a hunger for the real thing.
Great help sister
Go for a bigger addiction-MEDITATION
I have no doubt I suffer from hyper sexual compulsive behavior. It’s definitely real and I don’t want it to ruin my mental health and relationships
A good start that you're aware of that! :)
No such thing. You're misinformed. Stop playing a victim 😊😅
Why is it that whenever a man single? Or critical with women? The question is asserted “Who hurt you? As if being single and not chasing tail is out of the ordinary. As if being about me to learn from the bad relationships of peers, or people online and voting I be aware is wrong think.
Why is it that people assume that if you masturbate even semi frequently then you have to be coping? It’s not. It feels damn good. Relieves most forms of stress for me and it’s better than any supplements or over the counter. All natural .
Absolutely outstanding video 🏅
Many people masterbate without watching Porn. So, the issue has little to do with Porn. Sex addiction is not confined to masterbation and includes having frquent sex with a partner. But she is only concerned about Porn and masterbation.
Is there any link with passive trauma? Being neglected emotionally as a child?
Do you mean having a lover on the side and you don't want your spouse to know about them?
Yes Dr Trish masturbation is an issue I stopped for like 2 weeks but I relapse I keep relapsing what to do doc Trish?
😊😊thank you Dr..
Thank you so much Dr. Trish Leigh, you are the best :)
Day 80 😊🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
thanks for posting my life is better because I listen to you
Wow this video came just in time
If it’s being recognized, why won’t health insurance cover help now?
Amen ❤
How to stop???😢😢😢
Follow along to find out! I try to give lots of tips. You can also check out my website for programs that I offer: drtrishleigh.com/get-started/
Nope! Why should you?
Changing behaviour according to our belief system doesnt seem healthy since our belief system is set by our culture,family
Hi doc! Your content is very interesting to me. I AM aware that my porn&masturbation is a sef-medicating habit. My wife of 42 years doesn't mind my habit and is quite aware of it, partly because sex is not necessary to her. IF I want a deeper sexual connection again with my wife, did I understand you to say that my sexual relationship with my wife cannot reach the huge gratification/reward that the release of sexual tension gives me through porn&masturbation? I value a renewed relationship with my wife more than my own gratification.
I stoped porn and masturbation after I see her videos and I had greater sex with my wife
He closes his eyes during sex. Doesn't kiss me or look at me
He dosent love you .. leave
LOL, until recently I hadn't realized that Mario updated his favorite way to tackle ED and it's a relief! Although what he previously suggested was pretty good, it was a real pain to follow... I just go'ogled the latest in Volpstein's Erections at Will, it's so much simpler and potent now!
Thank you Dr. Trish. IDK if youre still reading comments after a year, but wanted to give you a little feedback and share my experience.
Ive regularly masturbated to porn for many years maybe every day or other day. After watching a few of your videos I decided to make some changes and try a few things. I was able to cut porn but not masturbation. I was able to reduce masturbation down to maybe twice a week however. I still apparently have some dysfunction because for example, after 4 days abstinence, the urges were so strong Id have 3 full hours where I couldnt stop feeling the need to release and could barely concentrate on anything else for that whole time. I considered whether this was "the hijacker" doing this, but the feelings were coming from my libido and not my mind. When I finally got home, contemplating the incredible release, it then took me almost 30 minutes to orgasm, which by most standards is an eternity. So I clearly still have a dysfunction.
I think the important thing for me to remember in this is if Im working to make improvements in my sex life to not let guilt/shame dominate any perceived failures. And what I first decided was a failure realized it wasnt actually a failure but simply my body reaching its physical limits.
I feel good now and no guilt that Ive stopped porn, started looking away from scantily clad women and generally worked to focus my thoughts away from sex, and significantly reduced the amount of times I masturbate. I still suffer from some dysfunction but again maintain focus on my progress. Any guilt and disappointment is now gone which was a big part of my problem.
I do hope eventually to find a sex partner or more, but circumstances will tend to prohibit that for some time until my life gets together.
Masturbation is amazing for period cramps. Women need it 🙏
I am a big fan of her
she says you feel guilty about it because of ur belief system. but then doesnt talk about the beleif system and how to change it. she just says talk either talk to your partner or stop masterbating. a lot of people masterbate and they dont have issues. so shouldnt it be change ur beleif system and then you wont struggle?
You lost me at World Health Organization, zero credibility.
Former Catholic Priest Alan Watts claimes that Psychologists are dangerous in his lecture - On Being God.
Hii Dr. Trish Leigh can you tell us about the effect of meditation on porn brain.
Can it help a porn addict brain to heal faster?
I have a friend addict in masturbsting how yo solve it... Help us please
Day 280. Bless
Does it really cause constipation and decrease memory
I don’t know about constipation but it definitely affects your cognitive function such as memory by overstimulation and long term overstimulation destroys your memory and may cause brain fog it can make you dumb as a rock if done obsessively.
@@cliffchampion5501 is she trying to say masturbation alone is bad during recovery or after recovery
@@Max4Z masturbation is bad during and after recovery. The whole idea is too eventually break the addiction cycle to build a better you that’s what Dr.Trish is helping people with.
Nope!
When I’m with my wife and family, I feel awful about my porn and masturbation habits. But let me have a day off when nobody is around and it’s open season. I call it “ wicked Wednesday” since it’s normally my day off.😅
Do what ever makes you feel happy. It's that simple.
Eh, there’d be a lot more alcoholics and drug addicts lol
What if you are not in a relationship. Should I completely stop doing it? How long should I do no fap?
What is your opinion or research on the religious people who do it, is the guild more in them?
The 'guilt' comes from religion.
It’s been 9 months for me!
Has your erection improved significantly since you stopped. Did it go back to the normal state of how it used to be before you started the habit of masturbation?
Can you share your comparisons of yourself from 9 mo ago and now? Much appreciated!
Give me
Your pros for 9 abstention?
You avoided people who do not have a partner other than one you buy
Why using masturbation in the morning to help you get active or at night to bring yourself back down is considered a dependecy? Wouldn't it also be drinking a coffee in the morning or drinking wine/watching tv at night considered dependencies? why are those not considered as detrimental? I would argue giving yourself pleasure at night is healthier than watching TV...
What if you are a female n not married n never were married because 0f your Catholic religion you stayed single n your mother kept drilling don't get married don't have kids
Men are feeling guilty meanwhile more women are actually cheating on their man than ever. I’m sure those women are completely overwhelmed with guilt.
That’s right, until recently I hadn't realized that Mario updated his favorite way to tackle ED and it's a relief! Although what he previously suggested was pretty good, it was a real pain to follow... I just go'ogled the latest in Mario’s Thunderous Erections, it's so much easier and potent now!
You refer to a long-term habit of masturbation as being a compulsive disorder of people who suffer from hypersexuality. Please explain, because those are very strong terms that usually apply when sexual urges are uncontrollable and interfere negatively with a person's overall life. For instance, what used to be called nymphomania and is now called female hypersexuality is extreme promiscuity, which is highly risky, compulsive, and destructive to normal relationships.
Unless masturbation prevents someone from going to work and having healthy relationships or leads to public indecency, I am sure that it is NOT compulsive hypersexuality.
This kind of misclassification is only going to cause greater guilt unnecessarily. You might as well say that having a long-term, regular sexual relationship with a partner is compulsive hypersexuality. Why not?
Hi Trish. I like that shirt. Very cool !
Could you make a video about 12 step groups like S.A for porn addiction from a neuroscience perspective ?
day 6 and counting
It’s a nightmare I wish I never watched that crap. My urethra is in constant discomfort for 4 weeks now I’m terrified I quit for good but I’m worried the damage is already done I’m so scared. I’m seeing a urologist soon I really hope I get a second chance I’m so scared 😱
How'd uu do that man....like how u stopped ?
It’s easy for me because I irritated my urethra if I knew that was a risk I would have never masturbated it’s horrible man constant discomfort in the penis I mean constant it’s worse than a nightmare it’s horrible my life has turned upside down I pray God forgives me and heals me and enlightens the urologist to help me and then never again. I don’t even care about sex I just want this discomfort to go away. It’s torture
@@curiousladlfc2746 Jesus!! I’m hoping for a recovery
It did you no harm. Infection, maybe.
"I become a jerk" interesting phrase!