I also love how the parents seem so intentional on how they raised their non-white children. For example Story has box braids, and Deacon still sees his biological family
@@brendonrookes1151 I've seen so many angry children who've been in foster care (especially black and Hispanic). If they can have some stability and comfort of knowing they have a home to go to then that will help out just in the smallest way. They wouldn't have to worry about moving from house to house with only one suitcase and getting attached to a family just to be sent off to another family. My cousin was adopted (he's white but he has issues when it comes to the abandonment from his biological parents so imagine that on top of all of the other issues they have)
if they are as scared and emotional as I see in this vid, then the parents are filling their children with unneeded fear and raising potential racists. I don't rate that as "good".
The raw honesty and LOVE in these parents. When the woman openly admits she's only known this fear for the 15 years of her oldest adopted son's life, while black mothers have known this fear for decades and longer. That she is comfortable reaching out to black mothers of black sons and asking their advice. This isn't a woman who wants to adopt black kids just to look good; she lets her heart be led by need and goes where it takes her - she and her husband both! I pray for families like this because they are the face of America whether the country wants to admit it or not. We are not this race or that. We are Americans. All of us. And we need to learn to lean on one another for support and encouragement rather than focus on tearing one another down.
@@lettuceman33 oh wow ... I think this is the first time a comment of mine has garnered this many likes and no dislikes! Thank you for your kind words, it just adds to the fact there are more of us out there who want the truth to be seen, rather than the hateful narrative the media portrays. YES there is still violence. YES these mothers are justified in their fears and concerns, but they - and others like them - deserve to know they have allies and advocates who are willing to stand behind them. You all prove those exist!
Let me just add that this is one of many true faces; I was wholly remiss in mentioning the courtesy and grace of the black mothers who recognize the earnest love of white women like this, who willingly accept the genuine call for guidance and freely offer advice and support. True humanity does not exist in one race or culture: it is a rich and varied blend of multiple individuals willing to accept one another’s differences, to celebrate what makes one another unique while at the same time commiserating on the bonds that tie them together. Community, Family, Duty and Love.
@@GARY84ROCKS IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THEM. They are NOT the people she’s afraid of. It’s abhorrent that this could even happen to Ahmad and them to be not be immediately arrested. While I would like to believe everyone is good and loves me that’s not reality.
@@mileyan24 It has EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THEM. They ARE the ones that made her afraid. It's abhorrent that things like what happened to Ahmad happened... but the only thing DEFINITIVELY RACIAL in ANY of the big media scenarios you could name (some more credible than others), only have the racial implications THE MEDIA, and THE HOST OF THIS VID and YOU put on these events. SO, you can include YOURSELF as one of the people guilty of causing that child's tears of fear. Own it. Or stop it.
@@GARY84ROCKS her parents and the host most definitely did not cause her fear cmon now man. have you not seen all of the videos and the new of black people being murdered for no apparent reason other than their skin colour? hell if i was in her shoes i would be terrified as well and that’s not her parents fault that’s just racism’s fault.
Yeah. I understand where that lesson is coming from, but I feel funny about it. I personally don't want to raise my sons with fear of existing alone. The dependency of "Your safety is only guaranteed in the presence of your white brother," feels dangerous in itself. Same with my daughters and the fear of predatory people. Caution and precaution yes but not "You can't." As any child I get it, but not when they grow into young adults
My son is only six and in love with nerf guns. He’d point them at cars and people. Of course I put a stop to it but the fear of something happening to my son that happened to Tamir Rice... I’m fearful of everything.
I learned about Derek Black recently, and reading his story was very interesting. He is the son of a well-known Klansman and white nationalist. Thanks to uncomfortable conversations like these, with friends he had made in college, he was eventually able to grasp what was going on with how he was raised and indoctrinated. www.washingtonpost.com/national/the-white-flight-of-derek-black/2016/10/15/ed5f906a-8f3b-11e6-a6a3-d50061aa9fae_story.html
That'd be an amazing conversation. Hope Emm takes your recommendation. A granddaughter of the Westboro Baptist Church is someone you should look up. She grew up part of the antihomosexuals belief of that church, but she slowly realized it didn't make sense.
I love this mom. She said "I've only had this fear for my child for 15 years when black women have lived with this fear for decades." Wow. She's an ally for sure. She knows all the news stories and keeps herself educated and her husband seems like he does the same. You can tell they truly love their kids and their kids are happy, healthy and well rounded. Broke my heart seeing Story cry and you can see the empathy and hurt in the parents eyes like my baby is crying. Wow.
Completely average middle aged white male here. I swear, every time Story spoke I cried a little. That young girl just ripped me apart, and I'm not yet sure how to fully process the emotions I just felt.
Awwwww Jake you’re cute! ThankYou for being vulnerable enough to share that with us...and that makes you far more than an “average” man. Processing with an open heart makes you an Exceptional 👆🏿💞
Thank you for doing this. I am a white teenager in a small rural town. I don’t have any black family or friends. I just want to be a better person. A better friend, a better classmate. I just want to live peacefully with no one hating each other because of skin colour. I wish I new more on how I could be a better white person.
Honestly it sounds as if you're already a good person. You dont need to be a better 'white person' just continue to show compassion and empathy for your fellow human. 💙
Me too, except I live in a metropolitan area that's fairly diverse. The shift from colorblindness to education was swift and sudden, so I was reeling for a while, but I can summarize what I've learned over the years, and what I did to help. I'm lucky enough to have friends from multiple backgrounds who've been willing to help me. It's important to see everyone else as a human being with the same rights as anyone else, but you still have to acknowledge any disadvantages, discrimination, or cultures caused by/stemming from the overall systems or societies. On top of that, it's important to be aware of the fact that you would have white privilege, and that you're going to be perceived in a more favorable light than many people. At the same time, don't feel guilty about your race. These things happened in the past, and you don't have control over that. Ask questions, and answer any directed at you in kind. No one race or ethnicity is more culturally cognizant. I have friends from multiple backgrounds, and I've learned about their cultures in exchange for bits about my own (I'm 2nd gen Italian American on one side and Jewish on the other), so I can give a reference to those cultures in return. If you're afraid to ask or offend someone, that's ok, look it up first and then ask if you still can't find answers. Most of all, just be willing to listen. You're incredibly empathetic, and wrote your comment; that's the first few steps already. Don't do anything you're uncomfortable with doing. If protesting isn't your thing, that's ok. Just being willing to talk is incredibly important and having these conversations is already an important step. I hope this helped you. Good luck and wishes :)
As a black person adopted into a white family, I really appreciate this conversation. What you said about not losing blackness per se, but losing black culture really stuck with me. Over the past year or so, I have realized that even though I might “talk or act white” I will always be black. It does upset me that in a way, I was stripped of my black culture and heritage, but it’s conversations like these that help me realize I’ve still got plenty of time to explore who I am.
@@anestassia6346 it's kind of how some people say that certain black people "talk white" because they talk "proper" or "educated". It's like a stereotype that people expect us to all talk "ghetto" or "ratchet".
Its low-key racism if someone says "you dont talk like a black person." Like blacks are supposed to sound some kind of way. And if they dont sound that way, then they acting white. Some people aren't aware they have these attitudes and how it may be problematic.
@@baileyphillips9362 I have heard plenty of white people not sound educated and/or proper. Are you saying all white people talk the same? It sounds like alot of black people telling you to talk white. Cause I have been around white people ally life. I have not found this "talking white" that you speak of. I heard them talking. Hell I've been around black people to and the sound quit similar if you ask me. The concept talking white? Who told you that? Other white people? Did someone walk up to you and say "start talking white"? Do all white people speak the same language? What you mean is talking proper and educated. That's never been exclusively a white thing.
@@baileyphillips9362 but isnt what you posted just playing to that stereotype? You said even though you talk and act white, your still black... Doesnt this type of rhetoric only bring down the black community? I've heard this so many times and often from the black community itself. Black people saying other black people are not black enough because they don't talk "hood". In the Hispanic community as well, I've had family members make fun of me for loving to learn and going to college and starting an actual career and they say I'm white because of this. Its minorities bringing down their own people and not valuing education that brings them down.
at 12:09 he says "When a cop pulls me over it won't be, oh you have a little white, I'll let you go, you have black so you're black......." This boy is too young for that to be a part of his thoughts let alone his reality. Powerful words.
This stuck to me the most, I am mixed race myself and that's something I never realized I feel as well, but I completely do and I just wasn't conscious of it, but I am way more cautious in everything I do than my white friends because I know that it won't be perceived the same way if I do it, because of the whole "angry black/brown woman" narrative is ever present, and it's something I always try to avoid.
Emmanuel, I'm a 76-yo African American, former US Marine etc., etc. I've skipped past your videos a few times here on TH-cam. Today I thought let me see what this brother is talking about? Man, I'm kicking myself and I would like to THANK YOU so much for having the conversations that we need to have in this country. I wish that you can be seen on a greater platform as well, something the world would benefit from. You'll have to excuse me now, have more of your videos to watch. Ed
That's true, very true. My daughter is adopted from Haiti, I did the opposite. I immersed by daughter in her Haitian culture and African cultures, we did all different activities and joined different groups. Then one day she told me to STOP, she said she was not interested in any of it, and that I am forcing her to be someone she isn't. She said that I don't even celebrate my heritage. She is 19 now, has a passion for Japanese anime, loves art, is doing her Associates Degree, loves music (not rap or hip hop) and is an older soul in a young person's body. There is an African American girl who does Irish dancing and is well known, a AA boy who sings in Mandarin, Chinese opera, and the list goes on and on. Just because you are of a certain race doesn't mean that you are only that, people are connected to what fills their soul.
I think that's because no matter what people try to define as "black" culture it is young. It is still growing and shouldn't be limited. It's one of the younger if not the youngest cultures alive. I think I cared more about American culture until I found myself in conversations that I couldn't contribute to. Irish, Jewish, etc spoke about their heritage and culture and I couldn't say anything about mine.
Thank you for saying this. I am a black woman raised by my black mother, but I grew up with no connection to my extended family. Surrounded by whiteness all the time. My experiences were awful for the most part. Got called an Oreo all the time and didn’t get much exposure to other black kids or culture. I wish I would have grown up with black family and immersed in black culture. I’ve made it a point to change those aspects I was missing in my life but it’s been so much harder than it would have been if things were different.
I started crying when Story stated crying. I cry everything I hear the news of someone being lynched. It hurts my heart so badly. So hearing her talk about her brothers, you could feel it. Maybe I'm extra sensitive. I know that Emmanuel Acho is making a real change. Thank you and I am so appreciative of families like these. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❤❤❤
I cried at the same point. I'm glad there are still other people who are as sensitive to these emotional moments as I am. It seems most of the country has been desensitized (by different degrees, of course) to the more tear-provoking aspects of life over the last few years.
@@PBthesquirrel It seems like there still are some who don't see the deaths as modern day lynchings or why are not empathetic or even sympathetic to the things that are going on in the world. I am so glad that these conversations are happening no matter how difficult.
I watch your videos with my six year old son. So we can have conversation too. Today we both began to cry as Story cried. My son tell me “Its not fair that they have to be scared. Can we make a video saying we will stand up for them? That we stand up for all our black friends and all people that feel different. No one should feel bad or scared for being themselves.” Thank you for putting content out that let’s us have discussions with our children, neighbors, friends and family.
Thank you for how you're choosing to raise your son. The next few generations are giving me so much hope that what we're experiencing are the birth pains of a new and better country.
That is a Beautiful thing you're doing with you son and I just love ❤ his precious heart you're doing a fantastic job Mom may God continue to Bless you Both 🙏
Its 1 thing as a child but once your grown and can understand what all this means it takes a whole another toll on you. I'm 31 and let me tell you these are some of the hardest years of my life now because hatred knows that I can fully understand whats going on and unlike being a child I can't go about it the same way as if I was a child because that could get 31yr old me killed. Honestly I dont think most white ppl would last a day in our shoes its tough its it own problem every day I wake up (like groundhogs day)
As a black mother with two black sons one being a teenager I am fearful of letting him go hang out because he may not come back home. The fear we have is real and there are a lot of white people that don't realize how much more dangerous it is to let your black child go to the store or park, you don't just worry about bad cops but also the racist person in the neighborhood.
Parents adopting a child independent of their race is the ultimate statement, not only saying but also meaning that they don’t care for races and see that everyone is the same. People advise these parents to teach their children about their black heritage. Honestly, there are probably over 1000 black cultures (depending on where their birth parents were born), their birth parents left them, and it’s the new parents’ decision of how to educate their children. If someone adopts a child whose parents were from Spain, should they teach their child everything about their Spanish heritage? No, it doesn’t matter because their child is not Spanish anymore. Their parents don’t know anything about Spain and can’t speak Spanish. Their children should learn about their adoptive parents’ heritage. Teaching the child about their birth parents’ heritage is just going to subtly “separate” their child’s from their parents and bring up a subtle feeling of “you are different from me.”It’s the exact opposite of the equality of races. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying they shouldn’t learn about their black heritage - they can if they decide to -but it’s not their parents’ task to educate them on that.
Damn! That is some fine ass parenting! The wisdom within these two to do what’s right for all of their children is getting to the core of what it truly means to be good humans. Kudos to you all for this honest and open conversation.
"We cannot parent in a wise way if we're just going to try to be comfortable al the time" These words are so very wise and truly moved me. I'm so grateful for these conversation. Emmanuel, I thank you and your guests for your eye opening and thought provoking messages. Cant' wait for the book!
I do question a little bit the questioning here. "White people hunting down black people. Are you scared?" "Yeah, I'm a little scared" "Why?". You just told a kid white people are hunting down black people!!!!
Martijn Pennings aren't they? The problem is a lot of white people close their eyes and ears to this problem because it's not something they have to fear. So yes we are being "hunted" by whites now and tho it's nothing new, it's more in the open now. Now whites are forced to see this and in return they lessen the validity of what they see. You're offended by a question, not by the reality of it.
I raised two bi-racial sons, in a oooh scary red state. Nothing scary at all. No incidents, no issues. I think she convinced herself it was scary and that is on her for buying into the hype
After working at children services I saw how Black children were often the least adopted and fostered so I definitely appreciate this family for showing unconditional love to children that are not biologically their own. I rather see a child in a healthy and loving home than stuck in the system
"i'm black. (...) i do have a little white in me but when a cop pulls me over, it won't be 'oh, you're a little white, i'll let you go'." damn, deacon.
Thank you SO very much for this entire series. I look forward to watching every episode and have learned so much from each one, such a huge blessing, thank you!
I love that this mom gets it!! They have understood things that many white people miss!! Excellent parenting of their biracial family! They are not ignoring issues, they are meeting them head on👍🏽
Wow, I never knew black people in America are such Victims in life! Here is me coming from a poor country of fuck all opportunity and I feel not a single ounce of Victimhood, I Just enjoy life regardless of my lack of opportunity.
That's the crux of the issue. Not ignoring it. Not belittling others experiences because you can't relate. But actually confronting any and all issues. Honest, open discussion disarms so much hostility.
@@perthrockskinda2946 it's ok to be angry. It's not ok to project all that hostility on others. It's especially not ok to pretend to understand the plight and hatred others have experienced when you are clearly wholly ignorant on the matter. Good luck.
Thank you lady for saying proximity and relationships with black people matter. It forces you to have conversations you normally wouldn’t have to think about. It’s easy to say “those people “ when you live across town and view them on tv or on the news. This was interesting !
completely agree, & glad it was mentioned. . had friends my entire life of all cultures & dated women of all backgrounds, eventually marrying a woman who happens to be black. i've made mistakes from ignorance, mostly while very young, & try to remain open to learning more & being better. perspective is so important. my half-brother tho... all but 2 people in his life have been white (Hispanic neighbor kid for 6mo & half-Korean GF for a year). his knowledge of cultures, understanding, empathy, & willingness to accept/diminish his ignorance ...all zero. i've been trying to reach him for decades, much like the feeling of responsibility Cayden talked about, but get nowhere. inability to reach him hasn't only been about race, but as it effects others who he comes in contact with, it's been the most important issue to attempt. . so frustrating...the people who need to hear these convos the most, seem to be the ones who refuse.
Well said. As a white guy who grew up with just a few black friends, it took immersing myself in black/brown culture as an adult to even begin to understand. I will never know what it's like to be black in America, but at least I now know what I don't know.
It's true. If you the only thing you see of black, hispanic, or white people is only what the news and tv shows you'll have a jaded view. One of the biggest factors that had helped us get even this far is military service. You take a group of people from diverse backgrounds all fighting for the same cause. You don't just create acceptance you create family.
But it happens all the time to black and brown children. As a Jewish girl growing up in Georgia, I often would tuck my necklace when going places to not be seen as Jewish. We had bombings, KKK marches, and cross burnings. My parents tried to shield me but kids see more than you think.
You're absolutely right. Unfortunately, it's not the reality for black, brown, other communities of color or for LGBTQ. In communities of color have to teach our children how to behavior in certain situations as a resource of survival. In hopes they make it home safely.
@@ashyslashy5818 Did you forget that not all black people are Africans? Where did you get 1 million white men? Look at American history before making wild, inaccurate and hurtful claims. Are you talking about the Civil War? Here is a link to gain more insight. My comment has to do with the fear and anguish of a child. Full stop. Please stop shouting. Practice grace.
I feel the same way for my kid who is not black but special needs. I'd feel this way regardless to be honest because that's how I was raised as a female in a poor neighborhood. But I feel for people that have to go through this no matter the reason. It's pathetic that anyone should have to fear for their lives (and/or wellbeing) because of skin color. We are lucky we don't live in a worse country tbh and I have to remind myself to take a step back and have perspective. Most people are good, most cops are good otherwise we would be in an entirely different state of living.
My old neighbor and I would discuss this. He is a Black man who was raised by a white stepdad and I'm a white stepdad to a Black son. When he leaves the house, I tell him to be safe and do the right thing.
Hearing story’s pain and fear was emotional she’s still a baby but this is the reality we have to teach our kids these things at a young age .. for generations God bless this family 🙏
We don't. We don't have to teach our Black children to live in fear! That little girl was deeply crying and fearful that she would be killed by a white person because of her skin color. We shouldn't teach that because it's not true! Do you realize the psychological damage that they are causing that innocent little girl to have? Taking away the carefree nature of being a kid, taking away her self esteem. How is that helping her or those boys to be successful people? WE ARE NOT VICTIMS.
Natrunsfar why do you think our ppl are protesting? Because it’s all made up believe magic ppl are dieing out there. I have to teach my black children the world may not accept them for who they appear to be. I don’t like this reality but it’s happening for centuries. George Floyd ain’t the first or the last brotha to get his neck snapped
@@derrickmason7457 It's not made up, but it is exaggerated through media, creating extreme sensitivity about situations that may or may not be likely in one's own life. Of course, there is racially motivated violence against black people, but it's not especially extreme in current times from a measurement standpoint. White on black racial violence has actually been decreasing statistically for a long time now, with some upticks here and there but a general decline overall. What's really changed is that people are more sensitive to it then before - this is thanks to 24/7 access to media of all sorts. This is both a good thing and a curse. It's good because people are becoming more aware of the real injustices that happen to black people. It's a curse because it has lead to a lot of opportunists and provocateurs using fear to construct a reality that doesn't match the real world. A pessimist might say that the increased racial violence coverage is because it's an election year, which will stop being talked about nationally if Biden is elected. As I am sure you know, the BLM movement is very political and what they protest does not represent many black peoples' reality in the USA anymore. Some black people experience little to no direct racism in this country now. Although there is still racism in various forms, things have become drastically better for black people, even in the last 30 years. We would be lying to ourselves if we did not admit this. It's one thing to become educated about reality and conduct oneself as a person in society, but's it's another to be taught to fear society based off false realities. Being taught to fear things one cannot control is toxic for child development. If too deeply ingrained, it creates emotionally unstable, fearful, and angry adults. I think we can see the evidence of this all around us.
Emmanuel has become such a great interviewer. Allowing them time to think and talk it out. He allows them to correct him if they feel something different than what he was saying. He's simply guiding the conversation and allowing them time to discuss how this has affected them.
That little girl broke my heart, but her response literally could have not been more perfect. What a great family. Thanks for having this conversation. Emmanuel, please keep doing what you're doing. We are listening. We hear you and we thank you.
This episode had me in tears from the moment Story began to share. As a mom, it hurts me to my core that a child has to feel scared like that. No child should have to know fear, ever... Thank you so much for having these conversations. I look forward to them even if they do make me ugly cry. ❤️❤️❤️
Love this. We are a very mixed family. I'm black, my husband is Puerto Rican. We have 3 biological children and have adopted 6 children. 2 are white, 1 was Mexican-Peruvian and 3 are black. We love them all unconditionally. All know their own culture and heritage.
My son told me I should watch your video. I am a white mom to black sons. So much of this resonates with me. Thank you for sharing this with the world.
I'm mixed with White and Native American genes. My wife is Mixed with Black, White, and a dash of Native genes. Our son is a Beautiful Mix of our genes. Wanting him to hold onto both his Black and Native heritage has been a conundrum to say the least. People get uncomfortable around us, like they don't know what we are. I loved this episode.
AllDayRay If you don’t mind me asking, how do they act uncomfortable? I am a Hispanic mix & grew up where there are small population of Native Americans. We could watch pow wows, one of Dad’s best friends was named Running Bear, & he collected & made arrowheads. I guess I am focused on how I am treating people & not noticing how other people treat people. It is my personal mission to spread kindness to people I see; I know it’s not much of real help. Sorry to ramble, make sure you tell your kids that there are a lot of people out there who do appreciate diversity & mixes. 😉
@@amywjn Well at our local tribes Pow Wow we get funny looks for having a black son dressed in full regalia and dancing. Usually it's stuff like that, like we misappropriate culture. Wearing Native clothing and being black isn't something people in rural Kansas are use to I guess. We've even had people say things like, "He's so cute, what is he?" Uhhh he's a person.... That's what gets me the most "What is he?" Why does it matter, he's a beautiful baby. That's awesome, I think knowing and talking about other cultures is important to how we understand each other. Keep spreading the love!!
AllDayRay So glad you have places to take your kids to learn about their heritage & take the time to do it. Keep it up.👍🏼👍🏼 I probably make the mistake too of sometimes asking the heritage of people, I guess being mixed (hispanic, German, English, Native American) I think it is interesting to find out about other people. But in today’s times it is probably better for me to just not ask. I guess people with Caucasian descent have mixes of different heritages it is just not as obvious, but cool too. Take care. ❤️
Now I want another episode with this family! They seemed so honest, normal, and heartfelt! Loved hearing the different perspectives and different voices.
This one hit me hard because I have a black sister from a Jamaican culture background and I worry more and more about her everyday. I want to protect her the best way that I can and not feel helpless if God Forbid anything did happen to her. Our family is white and I have a black sister and I love her so very much and I cried this whole video... I cannot fathom life without my sister and I continue to learn about her culture so I can do my best to support her
My ex once stated she believed people should not have mixed race children. Her concern was for the impact on the child, but still, I was like you really need to think through the implications of what you're saying. To myself I was saying, who is this person?
I'm mixed and the entirety of my life has been "Choose ONE Race!" It's crazy because the culture I was raised in is not the culture I "look like" so the consequence is that I never feel like I belong anywhere. Most of the people I know who are mixed feel the same way. We want to embrace both of our parents (sometimes, lol 🤣🤣), but society makes that impossible.
It’s not hard for them in the white neighborhoods. My cousins are mixed. He got a full ride at Auburn because he’s smart and a hard worker. In the hood however, he would’ve been ridiculed for not being another crime causing hoodlum or gang member. They would’ve tried to take advantage of him because he doesn’t listen to rap music. They would’ve probably tried to kill him simply because he isn’t trying to ruin his future at the same rate so many others are. There’s your problem. Why don’t you monsters try to talk about that???
THIS IS THE CONVERSATION I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR. Thank you! My daughter has been called nasty names, asked if she is babysitting, and had cops called on her because people can’t fathom a blonde haired/blue eyed very pale white woman having two black sons. Some cops actually ask for her adoption papers even though she is their biological mother. She holds herself w/ grace while I become hot under the collar. It’s beyond ignorance or rudeness. Most of the time it is plain old Texas racism. The boys are getting old enough to notice the different ways they and their mom are treated. That breaks my heart.
Janice Isaacs It’s so sad. I can’t help but look those people straight in the eye and meet their gaze. Some days I want to glare other days I want to smile. It’s 50/50. I know I should make it a teaching moment, but it makes me so angry & dumbfounded in humanity. I am guilty of thinking we were past this stage. My grandsons were a wake-up call to my white privilege & how many bigots/racists there still are in America.
@@MelissaMellyMelRoberge my grandchildren were my wake up call as well. I try to make conversation if I think it's just a matter of curiosity, but if I feel the bad vibes I try to walk away.
Story made me cry every time she spoke. She's such a precious child and her sweetness and kindness speaks volumes of the good and loving parenting she's receiving.
Fear is about wanting to be comfortable was nicely put. Glad that the parents provided a home that was willing to be uncomfortable. Cayden and his siblings are wonderful young people.
Yes. You're the first to comment on that from what I see. I loved that. That's a real brother and he seems like he has such a gentle spirit. I'd love to follow this family more.
Mr. Acho you are amazing!!! I have black friends that i'm able to have open conversations with and love truly is what help shape us all!!! Thank you for all you do and keeping us all at the table THIS IS what needs to happen on a national level. These issues we have can be solved if we have people like you and your guests that KEEP US ALL AT THE TABLE TALKIN!!! TYTYTYT!!
Dear Emanuel - thank you for facilitating these powerful conversations! I’m a white mom of a 44 year old bi-racial son (his father is black), so for 44 years I’ve, also, learned to be uncomfortable and to have uncomfortable conversations with my son, friends and family members. Raising a bi-racial son taught me empathy and opened my eyes. Growing up I was clueless about my white privilege until I married my son’s father in 1975 and my son’s birth in 1975. I love what you’re doing! Please keep these conversations going. You are allowing people to open up and creating a safe place for people to ask the difficult and uncomfortable conversations. Thank you, Diane
I am a white mom who adopted a Chinese daughter and an Ethiopian daughter and two sons. I can’t thank you enough for this conversation. I could identify so much with the mom. It also gave me a way to have another conversation with my kids. You are helping this world be a better place and we need that so badly. 🙏🏽
The section about "blackness" vs "Black culture" reminds me of the struggle of deafness. A child born deaf will always be deaf, but in a hearing household, it is easy to lose their Deaf culture (capital D is important).
@@savannahriley2077 Deaf culture is almost exclusively Deaf or Hard of Hearing individuals. Among the rare exceptions are CODAs ([hearing] children of Deaf adults). Sign Language is a HUGE part of Deaf culture. When you have a hard time communicating with most people, your language becomes really important to you. Nearly all Deaf people experience similar societal issues other than language. For example, "should I get a cochlear implant?" is a hot topic. Deafness is a quality that this group of people share. Even though it doesn't change the quality of the person, it is a defining characteristic from the outside perspective. I believe this is what develops culture. There's a lot more to Deaf culture than what I listed, but these are some of the basics. Please keep in mind that I am hearing and not really in the Deaf community. I am a student studying ASL Interpretation and I was VP of the Deaf Culture club at my college. So while I know what I'm talking about, I have not been subjected to the experience myself.
Yeah. Definitely. I am a CODA ( child of deaf adults ) and from the conversations I’ve had with my parents- school is a very big part of their deaf identity. It’s where you meet other deaf people around your age and get into the community. 9 out of ten hearing families have deaf kids and don’t learn how to sign so if ur reading this, and you have a deaf kid or family member please learn how to sign. It’s really important.
Story is such a beautiful soul. Hearing her speak about the pain she lives with made me cry for her. I am so happy she is living with such a loving family and has such wonderful siblings.
Yet another incredibly important conversation for everyone to be having. She really hit the nail on the head when she said that part of our white privilege is being able to not have these uncomfortable conversations if we do not want to. Thank you to the family, especially the sweet children who shared their perspectives. It has to be very challenging for them to speak up about their experiences and fears of living while black in front of their family members who are not black.
Asians and Indians make the most money per household in America and are least likely to be victim of crimes Not whites This country has a problem with Asian privilege.
When Story cried, I started bawling. I'm a white woman who didn't actually realize until my 30s that my cousins were Mexican! Sure we made tamales and enchiladas, but first and foremost, they were family. Let the children lead the way. This is THEIR world now.
Thank you Mr. Acho, I truly appreciate the conversations you are having. Please know they are opening eyes and your kind nature is opening hearts. Much love.
As someone of mixed race who's adopted by white parents, this one had me bawling. Though my situation was much different, i can still relate in some ways. Awesome man.
The youngest child, Deacon, has a lot wisdom for his age. Very smart and compassionate young man. What I need everyone to understand is that we are all interrelated. The earth was replenished via Noah & his family, therefore we are all descendants of Noah and related to one another. White supremacy is a fallacy; there's no race better than another. Racism is a matter of the heart and a sign of true ignorance.
A black boy once told me he was picked on by a couple his black fellow students because according to them he wasn't (behaving) black enough. I told him those boys were racist for wanting him to fit a "black stereotype" and he should be himself no matter what that ends up being. I might have been to harsh to judge, but seeing how different all these kids are it reminds me of that conversation.
Yes, my black partner was told that by a black social worker when we were going through the adoption process. She didn t like that he had a white wife (me) and thought he was too white. She tried to push all of her own prejudices onto him.
I was like that as a kid. I grew up in a predominantly black area. My mother is a black lover of classic rock, she loves all genres really but 60s and 90s rock the most, so I grew up listening to Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, Bob Dylan, Linkin Park, Nirvana, etc. I was so comfortable and excited to share that love of music with other kids when I finally began school but they didn’t share that love. They called me too white, it didn’t help that I’m light skin and I look racially ambiguous, and I was outcasted and left to hang out by myself or online. And when I finally moved to NY I found other people like me, black, white or otherwise. But I still am prejudiced against.
This is common. I'm 39 and still get told I talk like a white girl when I'm speaking proper English. Speaking proper isn't white and saying it is, is insulting to black people...as if p.o.c. are incapable of sounding educated🙄
As a 36 year old white man with a 29 year old white sister, but as someone with a large community of black friends and acquaintances, when Story started talking it put me to tears because I too am devastated that there are people who hate because of their skin color, that my friends whom I love deeply have to worry when they go out into the world. We must treat each other’s as we would our brothers- because they are.
I went to the swim pool all of the time in my teens. I got to know this white woman life guard. One day I needed a ride home and she told me that she would take me home. First we had to stop by her house. I said okay, no problem since it was on the way. She invited me in to meet her parents, no problem. I walked in and found that her parents were both black. I don't mind anyone's color and I learned not to see color after I meet her parents. I have carried that memory and it's meaning with me all of this time. Do not look at the color of a person's skin but the color of their heart and mind.
Petition to have Jane Elliott on this show? (The white woman who famously conducted race experiments where people were discriminated against based on their eye colour to show them what discrimination felt like)
as a fellow Haitian who was adopted into a white family I'm so happy for this conversation. I feel seen, i would like to add that just like my family was amazing and I love them so much you can see that great parenting is happening here All kids need is love, stability, and to be understood.m, hope more people adopt
@@candice446 My parents didnt know much but they had my go to other Haitians homes and play with their kids and stuff. I didnt really care to learn about the history and culture or language till about a year ago due to some things that had happened. Do I think they wanted me to know but I was shut off to it for a long time
CENDSI BUNDY I am Caribbean and from Barbados the Haitian culture is beautiful strong And victorious the FIRST colonized country to take their independence from the white man and have a monuments its inspiring the food is delicious the culture is beautiful it’s the island with the most African roots and culture you should be proud to be Haitian Because it stands for liberation and I pray one day you learn to love it and see the value in YOUR COUNTRY
I cannot put words into how this has made me feel. I’m sitting on my balcony with a father sleeping inside racist and ignorant and I am brought to tears. I see your pain, I can not understand it, but I am learning. And I will keep doing so.
This one has been my favorite conversation. I’m Mexican American and while my experiences are different than black people in America. We have certain overlaps and I stand with them in our struggle for equality. As MLK put it, to be judged by our character and not by the color of our skin.
Bere, I'm so interested to know if you grew up knowing anything about your Ethiopian culture? It's such a rich cultural heritage! Also, I love that your name is half of "berbere". So yummy!! 💖💖💖
@@jmk1962 To be honest, I sometimes feel as if the emotional connection with my adoptive parents might have been stronger if they were the same color as me.. but I do believe everything happens for a reason and I'm truly grateful for the people in my life and to be where I am today.
@@mixueer I was not taught much about Ethiopian culture while growing up.. but I have been researching and trying to learn more about it in the past few years. Lol no, my name is actually short for Bereket.
@@BHS2 - So glad to hear that. I do think in the ideal world black kids should be adopted by at least one black parent but unfortunately not enough black people come forward to adopt. But having loving parents of whatever colour is so much more important than a life in care.
Hey Emmanuel! I'm a white woman and I live in France. I understand that the situation is not the same as in the US. But the history of white civilization is a european history, France had colonies all over the world, including Africa, and slavery has been definitely abolished in the late 1800, so we totally have that heritage based on oppression. We do know white privilege here, even though it might be more subtle and less in your face. What I want to tell you is that I find it quite difficult to have these conversations in my entourage, because most people don't want to aknowledge our heritage. Even my husband refuses to have it, because in some way, he feels there's no hope. People are stupid, period. His words. :-) I share your conversations on my FB wall, because maybe, just maybe, it will trigger someone to reconsider their position and finally allow them to have that conversation. My biggest difficulty is to explain human diversity to my children, who are white and live in a mostly white environment. But they're still young, 4 and 5, we'll get there when it's time. In the meantime, thank you for giving us this platform, the hope and the positivity you spread. Thank you for challenging us. It's good for our souls. Much love.
Great to see this video is reaching you in France. And yes, France has always tried to "bypass" the issue of race by setting a policy of "assimilation" of its colonies into its culture (i.e all people from African countries that were colonised are "French by culture"). We all know that this was/is BS, as many of the Senegalese, Malians, Maghreb people who live in France are treated like 4th class citizens, despite having been born, bred and educated on the French soil for 4+ decades. There is a LOT of hypocrisy in France, as you said, and it is institutionalised to an even bigger extent than what we see in the USA, yet it remains invisible. That said, ethnic minorities in France have had the freedom to maintain their own culture that they brought from their countries of origins. This is unlike Black people in America who were striped from their identities so as to become properties for white masters over 400 years. That's why the debate HAS to happen in the USA if things have to change for better: it is non-negotiable.
@@nachannachle2706 Yes, you've said it well. The way racism manifests itself differs from country to country, because the history is not the same. But the underlying virus that is racism is everywhere. And we do need to have these conversations according to our own context. But I have to correct one thing: racism here is everything but invisible. It's even very much present in the mainstream media. And what is particularly hard to fight, is the prejudice that people with migration background face. As you said, the fact that they are treated like 4th class citizens when they are French just as anybody else with white skin and not called Mohammed. And America has another big, big problem that adds so much more fuel to the fire: your relationship with firearms.
I'm praying for you 🙏 I can understand that this is Difficult for you in your circle buttt this needs to happen and there's soooo much POWER in ONE person doing the right ✅ thing and Not the popular thing we are ONE PEOPLE Created by One GOD and in the End those people that wanted to Remain IGNORANT to the fact will have their just reward love you children and teach them ❤ Not Hate because We aren't Born RACIST Racism is taught in the home.! GOD Bless
Continue to share these videos on your social media. As as for your children, have them invite kids from different cultures to your home, indulge them in activities, museums, festivals, etc. where they can participate, see and learn different things, taste different foods, etc. I truly believe that we need to focus on the children, for they are the adults of tomorrow. Bonjour depuis Haïti ! 😀🇭🇹
I want to grab Story, hug her and tell her she is so loved. This is a beautiful story. America we need to do better for these children and all children, adults, PEOPLE in this country and beyond. I'm white I have privilege and I'm learning how to be honest with myself and do better 💗🙏
As a white woman married to a Hispanic man I really appreciated this. My husband and I are looking into adoption and we weren’t sure about adopting a race different from ours because we worried that they might lose a piece of themselves. But I treasure the point of kids being raised with enough love and having experience with their culture makes a happy family. Thank you for this video.
It confuses the child the do have a senses of emptiness yes they live their parents but anyone can tell you your beautiful but because you don’t look like them there will always be a sense of emptiness and displacement if a child is black ONLY a black person can teach them about their culture hair skin how to handle certain situations or someone that studied African/ African American/ Caribbean cultures which are beautiful cultures
@@NelliLowe See people like you are part of the problem, and people like you keep racism going. You heard Story the little girl say it didn’t matter if her parents where white because they love her and look pass the race. Like Emmanuel said just because the parents are white they can still teach their children black culture. How does a doctor become a doctor ? By getting educated, same thing applies. So according to what you said we should keep black or mixed, or monitory children in the foster system because white people can’t teach them about their culture ?? Wow
@@Hugo-Hernandez you didn't take your time and read my post I NEVER said that the children shouldn't be adopted I said some of the children deal with a struggle of their culture at some point yes you're parents can tell you that you are beautiful etc but they cannot prepare you for the struggles of being black the adoptive parent will have to bring that child around individuals of that race to explain the struggles is all im saying. If I had a white adoptive mother and I came home and told her someone told me im too dark or my hair is too kinky or someone called me a N word she can talk until she is blue but because they don't look like you or haven't experienced that as the child you are going to feel like you don't have anyone to relate too. You jump to conclusions and thing everyone is racist instead of following up with a question. Its amazing that all children no matter what race are able to be love by an adoptive parent I have cousins that are adopted that are mixed with Chinese and our family let her learn more about her culture and brang her around family friends because she wanted to talk to people she could relate too
When Story cried, I cried 💔😔. Thank you for having this necessary uncomfortable conversation. This family radiates love, I see those children are their parents world ❤️.
Mr Acho... man you are the greatest. I love your show and I learn and lot . Also after I learnt from you, I go on a teaching mission. Love your work ... namaste from nepal 🇳🇵
While Story was sharing her feelings and thoughts, my heart broke. I was crying so hard with her and had an overwhelming urge to want to give her a hug. No child should ever have to live with the kind of fear that our children of color have to live with. I'm a 4th-grade teacher and I saw the faces of my students as these young people were speaking. I love that these kids had the courage to speak their truth and I hope they continue to have that courage because I am listening. I am learning. I am doing my best to do better.
Children of color don't have to live in FEAR. This is the BS the media is feeding you. I'm so sick of this horrible narrative that is continuing to be told in this country. The problem is, it's not true and now we are feeding this to Black children IN THIS DAY AND AGE, crippling them with FEAR and causing psychological damage that cannot be erased. As a Black woman raising 3 Black children, I cannot imagine damaging my kids like this - these are CHILDREN not science experiments. How will they ever have self esteem or grown up to be successful while carrying this unnecessary burden? She should be playing in a field of flowers, soaking up the sun, not listening to THAT. I wanted to put my arms through the screen, hug that little girl and tell her to close her ears. Unfortunately, she has to hear that every day of her life from her parents. Very sad.
@@Natrunsfar I apologize for my poor choice of words. I shouldn't have used the words "have to live in fear." I try to choose my words carefully and I made a mistake with my word choice. Though my message stays the same. My heart broke for this young lady and I want to learn more to do better. That part has not changed.
@@dmctgrlly Yes, and I hope that my words didn't come across as anger toward you. I think I just feel like America thinks Black people have a horrible existence in this country and I want to say that it is not true ALL THE TIME. I know there have been some bad things that have happened with police and I am in no way negating that. I do think it is important to have a positive outlook (what has happened with police is a small percentage - the media blows it up) and also we have to highlight the positive things happening in our country. I also realize it is hard to do that with this crazy year. But I ask you to think, what if the tables were turned and you had to constantly hear how horrible it was to be white? Especially if you knew your story and many, many others wasn't negative... I am not a person that gets on chat rooms and writes opinions, but I felt it was necessary to speak out. Not every Black person feels plagued by racism. I love people for who they are on the inside and I have felt that they love me for who I am - not what I look like. Ugh, there is so much to say. My heart broke too for this young girl. But, it's not going to help if she is told be her parents to be scared of walking outside. That is not right... Thank you for wanting to learn, and I hope you learn both sides - mostly the good.
![🎤 จับฉลากร้องเพลง x P’ #XXSIVK [EP.1] (2/2) เพื่อนจับได้คำไหน..ต้องร้องคำนั้น เริ่ม! 💓🎶 #MXFRUIT](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/1bJvMJXmeS4/mqdefault.jpg)
Lil man comforting his sister was beautiful
I loved Deacon. He's smart.
Ughhhh very 😢♥️
@@cloverbardot5215 p
Facts its perfect😭😭😭
😢❤️
I also love how the parents seem so intentional on how they raised their non-white children. For example Story has box braids, and Deacon still sees his biological family
They’re providing an example of what a positive adoption experience can look like, it’s beautiful
Ngozi O. There just virtue signalling
@@brendonrookes1151 Maybe, but if it creates a healthy environment, so what?
@@brendonrookes1151 I've seen so many angry children who've been in foster care (especially black and Hispanic). If they can have some stability and comfort of knowing they have a home to go to then that will help out just in the smallest way. They wouldn't have to worry about moving from house to house with only one suitcase and getting attached to a family just to be sent off to another family. My cousin was adopted (he's white but he has issues when it comes to the abandonment from his biological parents so imagine that on top of all of the other issues they have)
@@brendonrookes1151 These kids seems to love their parents and the parent seem to love them why the damn negativity
These kids are so intelligent. The parents are doing a good job.
if they are as scared and emotional as I see in this vid, then the parents are filling their children with unneeded fear and raising potential racists. I don't rate that as "good".
@@GARY84ROCKS yup that’s what they’re doing. You nailed it 😒.
@@TheSweetForever Good intentions don't mean everything.
@@GARY84ROCKS scared and emotional cuz its an uncomfortable talk lol
@@dom8894 If they were raised with less fear in their hearts it wouldn't have been.
The raw honesty and LOVE in these parents. When the woman openly admits she's only known this fear for the 15 years of her oldest adopted son's life, while black mothers have known this fear for decades and longer. That she is comfortable reaching out to black mothers of black sons and asking their advice. This isn't a woman who wants to adopt black kids just to look good; she lets her heart be led by need and goes where it takes her - she and her husband both! I pray for families like this because they are the face of America whether the country wants to admit it or not. We are not this race or that. We are Americans. All of us. And we need to learn to lean on one another for support and encouragement rather than focus on tearing one another down.
Wonderfully said
@@lettuceman33 oh wow ... I think this is the first time a comment of mine has garnered this many likes and no dislikes! Thank you for your kind words, it just adds to the fact there are more of us out there who want the truth to be seen, rather than the hateful narrative the media portrays. YES there is still violence. YES these mothers are justified in their fears and concerns, but they - and others like them - deserve to know they have allies and advocates who are willing to stand behind them. You all prove those exist!
A Great Word. God Bless.
Amen
Let me just add that this is one of many true faces; I was wholly remiss in mentioning the courtesy and grace of the black mothers who recognize the earnest love of white women like this, who willingly accept the genuine call for guidance and freely offer advice and support. True humanity does not exist in one race or culture: it is a rich and varied blend of multiple individuals willing to accept one another’s differences, to celebrate what makes one another unique while at the same time commiserating on the bonds that tie them together. Community, Family, Duty and Love.
That girl is the real thing! Kids don’t lie! She just wants and needs love. Nothing more!
Uhmmmmmmm!
And she doesn't need the racist fear-mongering of her parents or the host.
@@GARY84ROCKS IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THEM. They are NOT the people she’s afraid of. It’s abhorrent that this could even happen to Ahmad and them to be not be immediately arrested. While I would like to believe everyone is good and loves me that’s not reality.
@@mileyan24 It has EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THEM. They ARE the ones that made her afraid. It's abhorrent that things like what happened to Ahmad happened... but the only thing DEFINITIVELY RACIAL in ANY of the big media scenarios you could name (some more credible than others), only have the racial implications THE MEDIA, and THE HOST OF THIS VID and YOU put on these events. SO, you can include YOURSELF as one of the people guilty of causing that child's tears of fear. Own it. Or stop it.
@@GARY84ROCKS her parents and the host most definitely did not cause her fear cmon now man. have you not seen all of the videos and the new of black people being murdered for no apparent reason other than their skin colour? hell if i was in her shoes i would be terrified as well and that’s not her parents fault that’s just racism’s fault.
It made me sad when Amos said “go with a brother” because he could be hurt.
Amos is giving me Randall “ This is Us” vibes I love this family they’re both courageous and adorable
Yes I agree Zoe. Amos reminds me so much of Randall!
I have to pause the video, to live in fear for my son’s life everyday because he’s black.
Yeah. I understand where that lesson is coming from, but I feel funny about it. I personally don't want to raise my sons with fear of existing alone. The dependency of "Your safety is only guaranteed in the presence of your white brother," feels dangerous in itself. Same with my daughters and the fear of predatory people. Caution and precaution yes but not "You can't." As any child I get it, but not when they grow into young adults
My son is only six and in love with nerf guns. He’d point them at cars and people. Of course I put a stop to it but the fear of something happening to my son that happened to Tamir Rice... I’m fearful of everything.
I'd like to see children of racists discuss how and when they learned that their parents were hateful and ignorant and what they did in response.
Facts
I would be very well qualified to speak to this unfortunately :(
I learned about Derek Black recently, and reading his story was very interesting. He is the son of a well-known Klansman and white nationalist. Thanks to uncomfortable conversations like these, with friends he had made in college, he was eventually able to grasp what was going on with how he was raised and indoctrinated. www.washingtonpost.com/national/the-white-flight-of-derek-black/2016/10/15/ed5f906a-8f3b-11e6-a6a3-d50061aa9fae_story.html
That'd be an amazing conversation. Hope Emm takes your recommendation. A granddaughter of the Westboro Baptist Church is someone you should look up. She grew up part of the antihomosexuals belief of that church, but she slowly realized it didn't make sense.
Rising Out of Hatred - book talks to that issue specifically. Excellent book
I love this mom. She said "I've only had this fear for my child for 15 years when black women have lived with this fear for decades." Wow. She's an ally for sure. She knows all the news stories and keeps herself educated and her husband seems like he does the same. You can tell they truly love their kids and their kids are happy, healthy and well rounded. Broke my heart seeing Story cry and you can see the empathy and hurt in the parents eyes like my baby is crying. Wow.
Story is such a cute girl. Her crying killed me. They are such a cute family.
I'm washing dishes and crying right along with her - terrible that a child has to carry a fear like that. So sad.
got me bc i resonate with what she was saying soooo hard. :/
Me too! 🥺
me too
Yessss she had me in tears.
Completely average middle aged white male here. I swear, every time Story spoke I cried a little. That young girl just ripped me apart, and I'm not yet sure how to fully process the emotions I just felt.
Awwwww Jake you’re cute! ThankYou for being vulnerable enough to share that with us...and that makes you far more than an “average” man. Processing with an open heart makes you an Exceptional 👆🏿💞
Take your time ...
💝
If you have kids, teach them to be anti-racist. Intentionally teach them. We need your help.
On the other han 💊I'm sharing Acts 2:38 with anyone who wants it bless
As a white father of an adopted bi-racial child, this one especially hits home. Thanks so much for sharing this!!!
If ur child isn't stupid nothing will happen
@@brendonrookes1151 what did he sayyyy???
@@yuliyavlasik4811 😃👂did i HEAR that right
@@brendonrookes1151 shut up you know that's not true
@@brendonrookes1151 wym?
Thank you for doing this. I am a white teenager in a small rural town. I don’t have any black family or friends. I just want to be a better person. A better friend, a better classmate. I just want to live peacefully with no one hating each other because of skin colour. I wish I new more on how I could be a better white person.
Honestly it sounds as if you're already a good person. You dont need to be a better 'white person' just continue to show compassion and empathy for your fellow human. 💙
Don’t feel guilty about your race
Me too, except I live in a metropolitan area that's fairly diverse. The shift from colorblindness to education was swift and sudden, so I was reeling for a while, but I can summarize what I've learned over the years, and what I did to help. I'm lucky enough to have friends from multiple backgrounds who've been willing to help me.
It's important to see everyone else as a human being with the same rights as anyone else, but you still have to acknowledge any disadvantages, discrimination, or cultures caused by/stemming from the overall systems or societies. On top of that, it's important to be aware of the fact that you would have white privilege, and that you're going to be perceived in a more favorable light than many people. At the same time, don't feel guilty about your race. These things happened in the past, and you don't have control over that.
Ask questions, and answer any directed at you in kind. No one race or ethnicity is more culturally cognizant. I have friends from multiple backgrounds, and I've learned about their cultures in exchange for bits about my own (I'm 2nd gen Italian American on one side and Jewish on the other), so I can give a reference to those cultures in return. If you're afraid to ask or offend someone, that's ok, look it up first and then ask if you still can't find answers.
Most of all, just be willing to listen. You're incredibly empathetic, and wrote your comment; that's the first few steps already. Don't do anything you're uncomfortable with doing. If protesting isn't your thing, that's ok. Just being willing to talk is incredibly important and having these conversations is already an important step.
I hope this helped you. Good luck and wishes :)
You're at an amazing start by opening your mind, ears, and heart to those that are different than you. Thank you. Its amazing.
As long as you stick to good morals which I feel like you have you are going to go far in life
“Fear comes from wanting to be comfortable.” That got to me. That’s the root of so much going on right now.
Absolutely! I had the same thought. It's exactly that.
Me 2
And what's wrong with wanting to be comfortable, exactly?
@@captainbeastazoid7084 Nothing, but in this context being comfortable means not dealing with the issue in a real and substantive way.
@@rpwbass I disagree. Being uncomfortable is not a requirement for having a substantive conversation about race.
As a black person adopted into a white family, I really appreciate this conversation. What you said about not losing blackness per se, but losing black culture really stuck with me. Over the past year or so, I have realized that even though I might “talk or act white” I will always be black. It does upset me that in a way, I was stripped of my black culture and heritage, but it’s conversations like these that help me realize I’ve still got plenty of time to explore who I am.
What do you mean by "talk and act white" ?
@@anestassia6346 it's kind of how some people say that certain black people "talk white" because they talk "proper" or "educated". It's like a stereotype that people expect us to all talk "ghetto" or "ratchet".
Its low-key racism if someone says "you dont talk like a black person." Like blacks are supposed to sound some kind of way. And if they dont sound that way, then they acting white. Some people aren't aware they have these attitudes and how it may be problematic.
@@baileyphillips9362 I have heard plenty of white people not sound educated and/or proper. Are you saying all white people talk the same? It sounds like alot of black people telling you to talk white. Cause I have been around white people ally life. I have not found this "talking white" that you speak of. I heard them talking. Hell I've been around black people to and the sound quit similar if you ask me. The concept talking white? Who told you that? Other white people? Did someone walk up to you and say "start talking white"? Do all white people speak the same language? What you mean is talking proper and educated. That's never been exclusively a white thing.
@@baileyphillips9362 but isnt what you posted just playing to that stereotype? You said even though you talk and act white, your still black... Doesnt this type of rhetoric only bring down the black community? I've heard this so many times and often from the black community itself. Black people saying other black people are not black enough because they don't talk "hood". In the Hispanic community as well, I've had family members make fun of me for loving to learn and going to college and starting an actual career and they say I'm white because of this. Its minorities bringing down their own people and not valuing education that brings them down.
at 12:09 he says "When a cop pulls me over it won't be, oh you have a little white, I'll let you go, you have black so you're black......." This boy is too young for that to be a part of his thoughts let alone his reality. Powerful words.
Black children are taught this from birth. These are keys to survival his parents taught him well.
Deacon spoke truth.
This stuck to me the most, I am mixed race myself and that's something I never realized I feel as well, but I completely do and I just wasn't conscious of it, but I am way more cautious in everything I do than my white friends because I know that it won't be perceived the same way if I do it, because of the whole "angry black/brown woman" narrative is ever present, and it's something I always try to avoid.
just bc they see him as mixed doesn't mean he's fully black tho. i hate how people try to criminalize blackness as if that's all there is
It is sad to hear but depressing to know it's his reality
Emmanuel, I'm a 76-yo African American, former US Marine etc., etc. I've skipped past your videos a few times here on TH-cam. Today I thought let me see what this brother is talking about? Man, I'm kicking myself and I would like to THANK YOU so much for having the conversations that we need to have in this country. I wish that you can be seen on a greater platform as well, something the world would benefit from. You'll have to excuse me now, have more of your videos to watch. Ed
"Proximity matters" and "Embracing being uncomfortable" is what the world needs.
Amen
I couldn't handle it when Story started crying. Broke my heart
Got me too
Me too
Same! Couldn’t stop my own tears then 😭😭😭
same!
I wanted to give her a hug :(
Would love to see a "conversation " with Black parents who adopted White children. That would be interesting.
Does that even happen? Serious question.
@@NoobTubez i ve seen bloggers like this
NoobTubez yes that happens. My parents are black and my adopted sister is white.
@@NoobTubez Read up on Joshua Packwood...the 1st white Valedictorian from Moorehouse College in 2008. A black family took him under their wing.
It does happen but it is far less common. There are some families here on YT. Holden it down is one.
Having Black parents doesn't even guarantee that you will have that Black culture and Heritage. It's more likely but it doesn't always happen.
That's true, very true. My daughter is adopted from Haiti, I did the opposite. I immersed by daughter in her Haitian culture and African cultures, we did all different activities and joined different groups. Then one day she told me to STOP, she said she was not interested in any of it, and that I am forcing her to be someone she isn't. She said that I don't even celebrate my heritage. She is 19 now, has a passion for Japanese anime, loves art, is doing her Associates Degree, loves music (not rap or hip hop) and is an older soul in a young person's body. There is an African American girl who does Irish dancing and is well known, a AA boy who sings in Mandarin, Chinese opera, and the list goes on and on. Just because you are of a certain race doesn't mean that you are only that, people are connected to what fills their soul.
I think that's because no matter what people try to define as "black" culture it is young. It is still growing and shouldn't be limited. It's one of the younger if not the youngest cultures alive. I think I cared more about American culture until I found myself in conversations that I couldn't contribute to. Irish, Jewish, etc spoke about their heritage and culture and I couldn't say anything about mine.
I totally agree. I think there are different black cultures anyway. There's not just one. We all don't live cookie-cutter lives.
Thank you for saying this. I am a black woman raised by my black mother, but I grew up with no connection to my extended family. Surrounded by whiteness all the time. My experiences were awful for the most part. Got called an Oreo all the time and didn’t get much exposure to other black kids or culture. I wish I would have grown up with black family and immersed in black culture. I’ve made it a point to change those aspects I was missing in my life but it’s been so much harder than it would have been if things were different.
Agreeded
I started crying when Story stated crying. I cry everything I hear the news of someone being lynched. It hurts my heart so badly. So hearing her talk about her brothers, you could feel it. Maybe I'm extra sensitive. I know that Emmanuel Acho is making a real change. Thank you and I am so appreciative of families like these. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❤❤❤
When has someone been lynched ?
The wickedness is the lying. They will raise these black children to hate them
Ahmad Arbury, George Floyd, Breyonna Taylor are all modern day lynching booboo.
I cried at the same point. I'm glad there are still other people who are as sensitive to these emotional moments as I am. It seems most of the country has been desensitized (by different degrees, of course) to the more tear-provoking aspects of life over the last few years.
@@PBthesquirrel It seems like there still are some who don't see the deaths as modern day lynchings or why are not empathetic or even sympathetic to the things that are going on in the world. I am so glad that these conversations are happening no matter how difficult.
I watch your videos with my six year old son. So we can have conversation too.
Today we both began to cry as Story cried. My son tell me “Its not fair that they have to be scared. Can we make a video saying we will stand up for them? That we stand up for all our black friends and all people that feel different. No one should feel bad or scared for being themselves.”
Thank you for putting content out that let’s us have discussions with our children, neighbors, friends and family.
Amen! God bless you and your sweet son!😁 This is how change begins! Each one, teach one.
Thank you for how you're choosing to raise your son. The next few generations are giving me so much hope that what we're experiencing are the birth pains of a new and better country.
That is a Beautiful thing you're doing with you son and I just love ❤ his precious heart you're doing a fantastic job Mom may God continue to Bless you Both 🙏
1 MILLION WHITE MEN DIED FOR THE FREEDOMS OF AFRICANS HAVE A SHOW ON WHY AFRICAN NEED TO BE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.
@@ashyslashy5818 is this in Africa or America Clarify what you said.
No child/person should ever fear for their life for any reason, especially just for how they look.
Its 1 thing as a child but once your grown and can understand what all this means it takes a whole another toll on you. I'm 31 and let me tell you these are some of the hardest years of my life now because hatred knows that I can fully understand whats going on and unlike being a child I can't go about it the same way as if I was a child because that could get 31yr old me killed. Honestly I dont think most white ppl would last a day in our shoes its tough its it own problem every day I wake up (like groundhogs day)
Amen
The word child should be changed to PERSON. These beautiful joyous black and brown faces eventually turn into adults where FEAR continues to reside.
@@sweetunez31 Thank you
As a black mother with two black sons one being a teenager I am fearful of letting him go hang out because he may not come back home. The fear we have is real and there are a lot of white people that don't realize how much more dangerous it is to let your black child go to the store or park, you don't just worry about bad cops but also the racist person in the neighborhood.
I’m so happy he emphasized keeping black heritage, that’s a big one.
does that mean like how black people I need help understanding (no disrespect at all)
Parents adopting a child independent of their race is the ultimate statement, not only saying but also meaning that they don’t care for races and see that everyone is the same. People advise these parents to teach their children about their black heritage. Honestly, there are probably over 1000 black cultures (depending on where their birth parents were born), their birth parents left them, and it’s the new parents’ decision of how to educate their children. If someone adopts a child whose parents were from Spain, should they teach their child everything about their Spanish heritage? No, it doesn’t matter because their child is not Spanish anymore. Their parents don’t know anything about Spain and can’t speak Spanish. Their children should learn about their adoptive parents’ heritage. Teaching the child about their birth parents’ heritage is just going to subtly “separate” their child’s from their parents and bring up a subtle feeling of “you are different from me.”It’s the exact opposite of the equality of races. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying they shouldn’t learn about their black heritage - they can if they decide to -but it’s not their parents’ task to educate them on that.
Damn! That is some fine ass parenting! The wisdom within these two to do what’s right for all of their children is getting to the core of what it truly means to be good humans. Kudos to you all for this honest and open conversation.
"We cannot parent in a wise way if we're just going to try to be comfortable al the time" These words are so very wise and truly moved me. I'm so grateful for these conversation. Emmanuel, I thank you and your guests for your eye opening and thought provoking messages. Cant' wait for the book!
I started crying when Amos said he was scared. That's horrible and utterly justifiably sad. No one should be fearful.
Kate why is it justifiable fear?
I do question a little bit the questioning here. "White people hunting down black people. Are you scared?" "Yeah, I'm a little scared" "Why?". You just told a kid white people are hunting down black people!!!!
@Will G Okay, is this relevant to my remark or...
Martijn Pennings aren't they? The problem is a lot of white people close their eyes and ears to this problem because it's not something they have to fear. So yes we are being "hunted" by whites now and tho it's nothing new, it's more in the open now. Now whites are forced to see this and in return they lessen the validity of what they see. You're offended by a question, not by the reality of it.
I raised two bi-racial sons, in a oooh scary red state. Nothing scary at all. No incidents, no issues. I think she convinced herself it was scary and that is on her for buying into the hype
Amos saying ‘go with a brother’ REALLY hurt my heart .. WE NEED A BETTER WORLD!
After working at children services I saw how Black children were often the least adopted and fostered so I definitely appreciate this family for showing unconditional love to children that are not biologically their own. I rather see a child in a healthy and loving home than stuck in the system
Amen
This is the conversation I've been waiting for.
Same!
Why in the world? Do you get off on white guilt?
William Holdstrom wdym?? People are being educated here, not shamed.
@@williamholdstrom1879 They did not seem guilty to me.
Me too
I would really love to see black parents who are raising white children. That would be a whole new spin, and very “uncomfortable” for a lot of people.
THERE ARENT ENOUGH WHITE BABYS THE WHITE RACE IS BEING BRED OUT WITHIN 20 YEARS BY BY
I was raised by my best friends mother for a few years. It was cool she never made a big deal about it. Never judge a book by its cover.
ashy slashy What is your point?
@@jenniechao233 you do relize africans HATE the term color you better get on your knees and pray to your blm MASTERS. FOR YOUR SINS.
@@sweettexast2894 african americans are grateful for nothing ever!
"i'm black. (...) i do have a little white in me but when a cop pulls me over, it won't be 'oh, you're a little white, i'll let you go'."
damn, deacon.
Thank you SO very much for this entire series. I look forward to watching every episode and have learned so much from each one, such a huge blessing, thank you!
I appreciate how concerned those adults are for their kids. This warms my heart that those children are loved and protected.
Amen
It's propaganda there more likely to die at the hands of there own race cold hard facts
I love that this mom gets it!! They have understood things that many white people miss!! Excellent parenting of their biracial family! They are not ignoring issues, they are meeting them head on👍🏽
Couldn’t agree more!!!
Wow, I never knew black people in America are such Victims in life! Here is me coming from a poor country of fuck all opportunity and I feel not a single ounce of Victimhood, I Just enjoy life regardless of my lack of opportunity.
That's the crux of the issue. Not ignoring it. Not belittling others experiences because you can't relate. But actually confronting any and all issues. Honest, open discussion disarms so much hostility.
@@perthrockskinda2946 it's ok to be angry. It's not ok to project all that hostility on others. It's especially not ok to pretend to understand the plight and hatred others have experienced when you are clearly wholly ignorant on the matter. Good luck.
@@perthrockskinda2946 if you never felt an ounce of victim hood then you wouldnt be here crying about having it worse.
Story is the cutest and seeing her cry completely broke my heart.
Right like I started sobbing
She quit crying really fast.
Dam I didnt know I could be so sad. When the daughter cried I started crying too
I did too! And the Bi racial son's comment really made the tears flow.
Me too. 💛
• A N I S E - T R A S H • Thanks for the heads up about the phone number thing! I deleted it
Joseph Turner np
Me too.
Thank you lady for saying proximity and relationships with black people matter. It forces you to have conversations you normally wouldn’t have to think about. It’s easy to say “those people “ when you live across town and view them on tv or on the news. This was interesting !
completely agree, & glad it was mentioned.
.
had friends my entire life of all cultures & dated women of all backgrounds, eventually marrying a woman who happens to be black. i've made mistakes from ignorance, mostly while very young, & try to remain open to learning more & being better. perspective is so important. my half-brother tho... all but 2 people in his life have been white (Hispanic neighbor kid for 6mo & half-Korean GF for a year). his knowledge of cultures, understanding, empathy, & willingness to accept/diminish his ignorance ...all zero. i've been trying to reach him for decades, much like the feeling of responsibility Cayden talked about, but get nowhere. inability to reach him hasn't only been about race, but as it effects others who he comes in contact with, it's been the most important issue to attempt.
.
so frustrating...the people who need to hear these convos the most, seem to be the ones who refuse.
Well said. As a white guy who grew up with just a few black friends, it took immersing myself in black/brown culture as an adult to even begin to understand. I will never know what it's like to be black in America, but at least I now know what I don't know.
It's true. If you the only thing you see of black, hispanic, or white people is only what the news and tv shows you'll have a jaded view. One of the biggest factors that had helped us get even this far is military service. You take a group of people from diverse backgrounds all fighting for the same cause. You don't just create acceptance you create family.
@@Krazie-Ivan I agree, the ignorant and close-minded people are likely not interested in watching this video. Sad.
Well said :)
No child should feel that much fear for her siblings or herself. EVER.
NEVER!
But it happens all the time to black and brown children. As a Jewish girl growing up in Georgia, I often would tuck my necklace when going places to not be seen as Jewish. We had bombings, KKK marches, and cross burnings. My parents tried to shield me but kids see more than you think.
You're absolutely right. Unfortunately, it's not the reality for black, brown, other communities of color or for LGBTQ. In communities of color have to teach our children how to behavior in certain situations as a resource of survival. In hopes they make it home safely.
1 MILLION WHITE MEN DIED FOR THE FREEDOMS OF AFRICANS HAVE A SHOW ON WHY AFRICAN NEED TO BE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.
@@ashyslashy5818 Did you forget that not all black people are Africans? Where did you get 1 million white men? Look at American history before making wild, inaccurate and hurtful claims. Are you talking about the Civil War? Here is a link to gain more insight. My comment has to do with the fear and anguish of a child. Full stop. Please stop shouting. Practice grace.
“Do you fear for your black children’s lives?” “Everyday”
I felt that. I am terrified to let my son out into this world. It’s crazy 😭
I feel the same way for my kid who is not black but special needs. I'd feel this way regardless to be honest because that's how I was raised as a female in a poor neighborhood. But I feel for people that have to go through this no matter the reason. It's pathetic that anyone should have to fear for their lives (and/or wellbeing) because of skin color. We are lucky we don't live in a worse country tbh and I have to remind myself to take a step back and have perspective. Most people are good, most cops are good otherwise we would be in an entirely different state of living.
My old neighbor and I would discuss this. He is a Black man who was raised by a white stepdad and I'm a white stepdad to a Black son. When he leaves the house, I tell him to be safe and do the right thing.
look up the statistical data. theres nothing to be afraid of.
Hearing story’s pain and fear was emotional she’s still a baby but this is the reality we have to teach our kids these things at a young age .. for generations God bless this family 🙏
Being mix is the best bruh. Don’t know what everyone talking bout
We don't. We don't have to teach our Black children to live in fear! That little girl was deeply crying and fearful that she would be killed by a white person because of her skin color. We shouldn't teach that because it's not true! Do you realize the psychological damage that they are causing that innocent little girl to have? Taking away the carefree nature of being a kid, taking away her self esteem. How is that helping her or those boys to be successful people? WE ARE NOT VICTIMS.
Natrunsfar why do you think our ppl are protesting? Because it’s all made up believe magic ppl are dieing out there. I have to teach my black children the world may not accept them for who they appear to be. I don’t like this reality but it’s happening for centuries. George Floyd ain’t the first or the last brotha to get his neck snapped
Amen
@@derrickmason7457 It's not made up, but it is exaggerated through media, creating extreme sensitivity about situations that may or may not be likely in one's own life. Of course, there is racially motivated violence against black people, but it's not especially extreme in current times from a measurement standpoint. White on black racial violence has actually been decreasing statistically for a long time now, with some upticks here and there but a general decline overall. What's really changed is that people are more sensitive to it then before - this is thanks to 24/7 access to media of all sorts. This is both a good thing and a curse. It's good because people are becoming more aware of the real injustices that happen to black people. It's a curse because it has lead to a lot of opportunists and provocateurs using fear to construct a reality that doesn't match the real world.
A pessimist might say that the increased racial violence coverage is because it's an election year, which will stop being talked about nationally if Biden is elected. As I am sure you know, the BLM movement is very political and what they protest does not represent many black peoples' reality in the USA anymore. Some black people experience little to no direct racism in this country now. Although there is still racism in various forms, things have become drastically better for black people, even in the last 30 years. We would be lying to ourselves if we did not admit this.
It's one thing to become educated about reality and conduct oneself as a person in society, but's it's another to be taught to fear society based off false realities. Being taught to fear things one cannot control is toxic for child development. If too deeply ingrained, it creates emotionally unstable, fearful, and angry adults. I think we can see the evidence of this all around us.
Emmanuel has become such a great interviewer. Allowing them time to think and talk it out. He allows them to correct him if they feel something different than what he was saying. He's simply guiding the conversation and allowing them time to discuss how this has affected them.
Amen.. I love that
1 MILLION WHITE MEN DIED FOR THE FREEDOMS OF AFRICANS HAVE A SHOW ON WHY AFRICAN NEED TO BE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.
That little girl broke my heart, but her response literally could have not been more perfect. What a great family. Thanks for having this conversation. Emmanuel, please keep doing what you're doing. We are listening. We hear you and we thank you.
God Bless you for listening 🙏
Deacon while he didn't speak alot, when he did it was very articulate and impressive for someone his age. It made you want to pay attention.
“There is no comfort in growth. There is no growth in comfort.” If you’re uncomfortable it means you’re growing as a person. I love that quote. ❤️
Amen that is CORRECT 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙌🏽
This episode had me in tears from the moment Story began to share. As a mom, it hurts me to my core that a child has to feel scared like that. No child should have to know fear, ever... Thank you so much for having these conversations. I look forward to them even if they do make me ugly cry. ❤️❤️❤️
Ugly Crying 😢 is good for the Soul and changes us for the Better 😊🙏🏽
Love this. We are a very mixed family. I'm black, my husband is Puerto Rican. We have 3 biological children and have adopted 6 children. 2 are white, 1 was Mexican-Peruvian and 3 are black. We love them all unconditionally. All know their own culture and heritage.
That's a whole world within the 4 walls of your home.
May God continue to Bless you ALL 🙏
I love your name. Very cool. You need a television show.
❤️
GOD bless you and your family. :)
My son told me I should watch your video. I am a white mom to black sons. So much of this resonates with me. Thank you for sharing this with the world.
“They changed us!” That’s what our children do. “They” grow us up!
That is CORRECT
I'm mixed with White and Native American genes. My wife is Mixed with Black, White, and a dash of Native genes. Our son is a Beautiful Mix of our genes. Wanting him to hold onto both his Black and Native heritage has been a conundrum to say the least. People get uncomfortable around us, like they don't know what we are. I loved this episode.
AllDayRay If you don’t mind me asking, how do they act uncomfortable?
I am a Hispanic mix & grew up where there are small population of Native Americans. We could watch pow wows, one of Dad’s best friends was named Running Bear, & he collected & made arrowheads.
I guess I am focused on how I am treating people & not noticing how other people treat people. It is my personal mission to spread kindness to people I see; I know it’s not much of real help.
Sorry to ramble, make sure you tell your kids that there are a lot of people out there who do appreciate diversity & mixes. 😉
@@amywjn Well at our local tribes Pow Wow we get funny looks for having a black son dressed in full regalia and dancing. Usually it's stuff like that, like we misappropriate culture. Wearing Native clothing and being black isn't something people in rural Kansas are use to I guess. We've even had people say things like, "He's so cute, what is he?" Uhhh he's a person.... That's what gets me the most "What is he?" Why does it matter, he's a beautiful baby.
That's awesome, I think knowing and talking about other cultures is important to how we understand each other. Keep spreading the love!!
AllDayRay So glad you have places to take your kids to learn about their heritage & take the time to do it. Keep it up.👍🏼👍🏼
I probably make the mistake too of sometimes asking the heritage of people, I guess being mixed (hispanic, German, English, Native American) I think it is interesting to find out about other people. But in today’s times it is probably better for me to just not ask. I guess people with Caucasian descent have mixes of different heritages it is just not as obvious, but cool too. Take care. ❤️
I'm fascinated by your family's multiracial heritage! What do you all choose as your racial identification on forms that ask?
Miss DeTria Was this a question for AllDayRay? He has a much more diverse mix than me. 😉
Now I want another episode with this family! They seemed so honest, normal, and heartfelt! Loved hearing the different perspectives and different voices.
Yes, way too short. There was so much more we could have learnt from them.
Jamie Ivey has a podcast and active Instagram account.
This one hit me hard because I have a black sister from a Jamaican culture background and I worry more and more about her everyday. I want to protect her the best way that I can and not feel helpless if God Forbid anything did happen to her. Our family is white and I have a black sister and I love her so very much and I cried this whole video... I cannot fathom life without my sister and I continue to learn about her culture so I can do my best to support her
Bless you brother 😭💗💗
Hug my brotha. 🤗.
🇯🇲🇯🇲🇯🇲 Visit Jamaican whenever you can and learn about the culture.
you talk about your sister as if she ware a pet.
When you told Deacon it may be hardest on him being mixed... I felt it. I'd love to see an uncomfortable conversation with a panel of mixed people.
Me too. I feel like this is the first time people have acknowledged how mixed people have a lot of external and internal struggles.
My ex once stated she believed people should not have mixed race children. Her concern was for the impact on the child, but still, I was like you really need to think through the implications of what you're saying.
To myself I was saying, who is this person?
I'm mixed and the entirety of my life has been "Choose ONE Race!" It's crazy because the culture I was raised in is not the culture I "look like" so the consequence is that I never feel like I belong anywhere. Most of the people I know who are mixed feel the same way. We want to embrace both of our parents (sometimes, lol 🤣🤣), but society makes that impossible.
It’s not hard for them in the white neighborhoods.
My cousins are mixed.
He got a full ride at Auburn because he’s smart and a hard worker.
In the hood however, he would’ve been ridiculed for not being another crime causing hoodlum or gang member. They would’ve tried to take advantage of him because he doesn’t listen to rap music. They would’ve probably tried to kill him simply because he isn’t trying to ruin his future at the same rate so many others are.
There’s your problem.
Why don’t you monsters try to talk about that???
Dr. Braxy Gilkey Cruises
Society makes it impossible???
Explain to me how society has stopped you from loving your parents! Give precise examples!
THIS IS THE CONVERSATION I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR. Thank you!
My daughter has been called nasty names, asked if she is babysitting, and had cops called on her because people can’t fathom a blonde haired/blue eyed very pale white woman having two black sons. Some cops actually ask for her adoption papers even though she is their biological mother. She holds herself w/ grace while I become hot under the collar. It’s beyond ignorance or rudeness. Most of the time it is plain old Texas racism. The boys are getting old enough to notice the different ways they and their mom are treated. That breaks my heart.
I am there with you. My grandchildren are all different complexions and we definitely notice the looks we get.
Janice Isaacs It’s so sad. I can’t help but look those people straight in the eye and meet their gaze. Some days I want to glare other days I want to smile. It’s 50/50. I know I should make it a teaching moment, but it makes me so angry & dumbfounded in humanity. I am guilty of thinking we were past this stage. My grandsons were a wake-up call to my white privilege & how many bigots/racists there still are in America.
@@MelissaMellyMelRoberge my grandchildren were my wake up call as well. I try to make conversation if I think it's just a matter of curiosity, but if I feel the bad vibes I try to walk away.
Wow, be strong, God is good and He has his arms around your family.
I'm sorry that your daughter goes through that.
Now that was a fantastic conversation, and one that everyone needs to hear. Well done, Emmanuel.
Amen.. it was Phenomenal
So inspiring and touching. As a black man raised by white parents, I can relate on SO many levels! Glad y'all embraced this much-needed discussion!
Story made me cry every time she spoke. She's such a precious child and her sweetness and kindness speaks volumes of the good and loving parenting she's receiving.
Fear is about wanting to be comfortable was nicely put. Glad that the parents provided a home that was willing to be uncomfortable. Cayden and his siblings are wonderful young people.
The parents in this segment have such a healthy grasp on reality.
I legit cried through this whole thing. This was so beautiful. What a beautiful family.
Loved this episode. I would have liked Emmanuel to ask the parents how they are maintaining their kids Black culture and any Haitian traditions
Exactly!
I cried during this video. we need to keep having these conversations . I respect what you are doing Emmanuel
The 6 min mark when her brother comforted her.... I couldnt hold it in anymore... Hard convo but so good so needed.
Yes. You're the first to comment on that from what I see. I loved that. That's a real brother and he seems like he has such a gentle spirit. I'd love to follow this family more.
I felt that when she said she had fear for her black kids especially her son as a mother of 3 black boys it’s heart breaking
Mr. Acho you are amazing!!! I have black friends that i'm able to have open conversations with and love truly is what help shape us all!!! Thank you for all you do and keeping us all at the table THIS IS what needs to happen on a national level. These issues we have can be solved if we
have people like you and your guests that KEEP US ALL AT THE TABLE TALKIN!!! TYTYTYT!!
Dear Emanuel - thank you for facilitating these powerful conversations! I’m a white mom of a 44 year old bi-racial son (his father is black), so for 44 years I’ve, also, learned to be uncomfortable and to have uncomfortable conversations with my son, friends and family members. Raising a bi-racial son taught me empathy and opened my eyes. Growing up I was clueless about my white privilege until I married my son’s father in 1975 and my son’s birth in 1975. I love what you’re doing! Please keep these conversations going. You are allowing people to open up and creating a safe place for people to ask the difficult and uncomfortable conversations. Thank you,
Diane
Amen and amen ❤️ 🙏
This was amazing... The parents were very authentic. Their reality that they learned more and grown due to having these children...
Amen
I am a white mom who adopted a Chinese daughter and an Ethiopian daughter and two sons. I can’t thank you enough for this conversation. I could identify so much with the mom. It also gave me a way to have another conversation with my kids. You are helping this world be a better place and we need that so badly. 🙏🏽
The section about "blackness" vs "Black culture" reminds me of the struggle of deafness. A child born deaf will always be deaf, but in a hearing household, it is easy to lose their Deaf culture (capital D is important).
What is Deaf culture and what makes up Deaf culture?
are we talkin about sign language? sorry, i have no knowledge about deaf people except surface level..
@@merasoul6520 sign language is a big part of it. See the other comment reply for a more in-depth answer
@@savannahriley2077 Deaf culture is almost exclusively Deaf or Hard of Hearing individuals. Among the rare exceptions are CODAs ([hearing] children of Deaf adults). Sign Language is a HUGE part of Deaf culture. When you have a hard time communicating with most people, your language becomes really important to you. Nearly all Deaf people experience similar societal issues other than language. For example, "should I get a cochlear implant?" is a hot topic.
Deafness is a quality that this group of people share. Even though it doesn't change the quality of the person, it is a defining characteristic from the outside perspective. I believe this is what develops culture.
There's a lot more to Deaf culture than what I listed, but these are some of the basics.
Please keep in mind that I am hearing and not really in the Deaf community. I am a student studying ASL Interpretation and I was VP of the Deaf Culture club at my college. So while I know what I'm talking about, I have not been subjected to the experience myself.
Yeah. Definitely. I am a CODA ( child of deaf adults ) and from the conversations I’ve had with my parents- school is a very big part of their deaf identity. It’s where you meet other deaf people around your age and get into the community. 9 out of ten hearing families have deaf kids and don’t learn how to sign so if ur reading this, and you have a deaf kid or family member please learn how to sign. It’s really important.
Story is such a beautiful soul. Hearing her speak about the pain she lives with made me cry for her. I am so happy she is living with such a loving family and has such wonderful siblings.
Yet another incredibly important conversation for everyone to be having. She really hit the nail on the head when she said that part of our white privilege is being able to not have these uncomfortable conversations if we do not want to. Thank you to the family, especially the sweet children who shared their perspectives. It has to be very challenging for them to speak up about their experiences and fears of living while black in front of their family members who are not black.
That is very true buttt I'm glad that God gave then the Strength so they could tell us Exactly how they felt 🙏
Asians and Indians make the most money per household in America and are least likely to be victim of crimes
Not whites
This country has a problem with Asian privilege.
When Story cried, I started bawling. I'm a white woman who didn't actually realize until my 30s that my cousins were Mexican! Sure we made tamales and enchiladas, but first and foremost, they were family. Let the children lead the way. This is THEIR world now.
Acho found his bag with this series. Respect to the parents for being so open on this difficult journey
Thank you Mr. Acho, I truly appreciate the conversations you are having. Please know they are opening eyes and your kind nature is opening hearts. Much love.
As someone of mixed race who's adopted by white parents, this one had me bawling. Though my situation was much different, i can still relate in some ways. Awesome man.
The youngest child, Deacon, has a lot wisdom for his age. Very smart and compassionate young man. What I need everyone to understand is that we are all interrelated. The earth was replenished via Noah & his family, therefore we are all descendants of Noah and related to one another. White supremacy is a fallacy; there's no race better than another. Racism is a matter of the heart and a sign of true ignorance.
Amen and amen that is CORRECT there is One Bloodline and we're ALL GOD'S Children 🙏 🙌 ❤
@@constancejenkins3867 Yep! Read Acts 17:26.
You better preach McPhee! 😏
@@lateefa260 Amen, Lateefa! God bless you.
When the dad said "fear comes from wanting to be comfortable" that is so true about many things in life.
A black boy once told me he was picked on by a couple his black fellow students because according to them he wasn't (behaving) black enough. I told him those boys were racist for wanting him to fit a "black stereotype" and he should be himself no matter what that ends up being. I might have been to harsh to judge, but seeing how different all these kids are it reminds me of that conversation.
Yes, my black partner was told that by a black social worker when we were going through the adoption process. She didn t like that he had a white wife (me) and thought he was too white. She tried to push all of her own prejudices onto him.
Spot on!
I was like that as a kid. I grew up in a predominantly black area. My mother is a black lover of classic rock, she loves all genres really but 60s and 90s rock the most, so I grew up listening to Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, Bob Dylan, Linkin Park, Nirvana, etc. I was so comfortable and excited to share that love of music with other kids when I finally began school but they didn’t share that love. They called me too white, it didn’t help that I’m light skin and I look racially ambiguous, and I was outcasted and left to hang out by myself or online. And when I finally moved to NY I found other people like me, black, white or otherwise. But I still am prejudiced against.
@@Himmel.Himmel Now by whom? I'm sorry, that's hard :(
This is common. I'm 39 and still get told I talk like a white girl when I'm speaking proper English. Speaking proper isn't white and saying it is, is insulting to black people...as if p.o.c. are incapable of sounding educated🙄
As a 36 year old white man with a 29 year old white sister, but as someone with a large community of black friends and acquaintances, when Story started talking it put me to tears because I too am devastated that there are people who hate because of their skin color, that my friends whom I love deeply have to worry when they go out into the world. We must treat each other’s as we would our brothers- because they are.
I went to the swim pool all of the time in my teens. I got to know this white woman life guard. One day I needed a ride home and she told me that she would take me home. First we had to stop by her house. I said okay, no problem since it was on the way. She invited me in to meet her parents, no problem. I walked in and found that her parents were both black. I don't mind anyone's color and I learned not to see color after I meet her parents. I have carried that memory and it's meaning with me all of this time. Do not look at the color of a person's skin but the color of their heart and mind.
That is so sweet and wholesome. I wish u the best for your future live. Pleace live these values in this world, we need people like u
“Fear comes from wanting to be comfortable” ……a GREAT way to put it!
Petition to have Jane Elliott on this show? (The white woman who famously conducted race experiments where people were discriminated against based on their eye colour to show them what discrimination felt like)
Y E S S S S! That would be awesome.
YESSSS PLEASE! That would be absolutely Spectacular!
Yes, with all deliberate speed...
Amen.. I love it 😀
1 MILLION WHITE MEN DIED FOR THE FREEDOMS OF AFRICANS HAVE A SHOW ON WHY AFRICAN NEED TO BE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.
as a fellow Haitian who was adopted into a white family I'm so happy for this conversation. I feel seen, i would like to add that just like my family was amazing and I love them so much you can see that great parenting is happening here All kids need is love, stability, and to be understood.m, hope more people adopt
Were you taught about your Haitian roots, or did you learn later in life?
@@candice446 My parents didnt know much but they had my go to other Haitians homes and play with their kids and stuff. I didnt really care to learn about the history and culture or language till about a year ago due to some things that had happened. Do I think they wanted me to know but I was shut off to it for a long time
💗
CENDSI BUNDY I am Caribbean and from Barbados the Haitian culture is beautiful strong And victorious the FIRST colonized country to take their independence from the white man and have a monuments its inspiring the food is delicious the culture is beautiful it’s the island with the most African roots and culture you should be proud to be Haitian Because it stands for liberation and I pray one day you learn to love it and see the value in YOUR COUNTRY
I cannot put words into how this has made me feel. I’m sitting on my balcony with a father sleeping inside racist and ignorant and I am brought to tears. I see your pain, I can not understand it, but I am learning. And I will keep doing so.
Hate is learned but it is with knowledge that we persevere.
It's great that your willing to learn, keep it up :)
Bless you! Stay strong and be courageous. People like you make the difference.
That's awesome 👌 👏 God bless you 🙏
1 MILLION WHITE MEN DIED FOR THE FREEDOMS OF AFRICANS HAVE A SHOW ON WHY AFRICAN NEED TO BE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.
Deacon is so soft spoken you can't help but wonder how deep his thoughts and experiences go. He is totally likeable.
The most effective conversation this far. Just make sure they get help with not allowing the fear to bound them.
This one has been my favorite conversation. I’m Mexican American and while my experiences are different than black people in America. We have certain overlaps and I stand with them in our struggle for equality. As MLK put it, to be judged by our character and not by the color of our skin.
Amen
I was adopted from Ethiopia by a white American family. As much as I love them, it's definitely been a unique experience lol
Serious question. Would you have preferred to have been adopted by black parents?
Bere, I'm so interested to know if you grew up knowing anything about your Ethiopian culture? It's such a rich cultural heritage! Also, I love that your name is half of "berbere". So yummy!! 💖💖💖
@@jmk1962 To be honest, I sometimes feel as if the emotional connection with my adoptive parents might have been stronger if they were the same color as me.. but I do believe everything happens for a reason and I'm truly grateful for the people in my life and to be where I am today.
@@mixueer I was not taught much about Ethiopian culture while growing up.. but I have been researching and trying to learn more about it in the past few years. Lol no, my name is actually short for Bereket.
@@BHS2 - So glad to hear that. I do think in the ideal world black kids should be adopted by at least one black parent but unfortunately not enough black people come forward to adopt. But having loving parents of whatever colour is so much more important than a life in care.
“Fear comes from wanting to be comfortable” rocked my world
It is really brave to have these uncomfortable conversations, Emanuel. I just want to say keep it up because we are here ready to take the lessons.
Hey Emmanuel! I'm a white woman and I live in France. I understand that the situation is not the same as in the US. But the history of white civilization is a european history, France had colonies all over the world, including Africa, and slavery has been definitely abolished in the late 1800, so we totally have that heritage based on oppression. We do know white privilege here, even though it might be more subtle and less in your face. What I want to tell you is that I find it quite difficult to have these conversations in my entourage, because most people don't want to aknowledge our heritage. Even my husband refuses to have it, because in some way, he feels there's no hope. People are stupid, period. His words. :-)
I share your conversations on my FB wall, because maybe, just maybe, it will trigger someone to reconsider their position and finally allow them to have that conversation. My biggest difficulty is to explain human diversity to my children, who are white and live in a mostly white environment. But they're still young, 4 and 5, we'll get there when it's time.
In the meantime, thank you for giving us this platform, the hope and the positivity you spread. Thank you for challenging us. It's good for our souls. Much love.
Great to see this video is reaching you in France.
And yes, France has always tried to "bypass" the issue of race by setting a policy of "assimilation" of its colonies into its culture (i.e all people from African countries that were colonised are "French by culture").
We all know that this was/is BS, as many of the Senegalese, Malians, Maghreb people who live in France are treated like 4th class citizens, despite having been born, bred and educated on the French soil for 4+ decades. There is a LOT of hypocrisy in France, as you said, and it is institutionalised to an even bigger extent than what we see in the USA, yet it remains invisible.
That said, ethnic minorities in France have had the freedom to maintain their own culture that they brought from their countries of origins. This is unlike Black people in America who were striped from their identities so as to become properties for white masters over 400 years. That's why the debate HAS to happen in the USA if things have to change for better: it is non-negotiable.
@@nachannachle2706 Yes, you've said it well. The way racism manifests itself differs from country to country, because the history is not the same. But the underlying virus that is racism is everywhere. And we do need to have these conversations according to our own context. But I have to correct one thing: racism here is everything but invisible. It's even very much present in the mainstream media. And what is particularly hard to fight, is the prejudice that people with migration background face. As you said, the fact that they are treated like 4th class citizens when they are French just as anybody else with white skin and not called Mohammed. And America has another big, big problem that adds so much more fuel to the fire: your relationship with firearms.
I'm praying for you 🙏 I can understand that this is Difficult for you in your circle buttt this needs to happen and there's soooo much POWER in ONE person doing the right ✅ thing and Not the popular thing we are ONE PEOPLE Created by One GOD and in the End those people that wanted to Remain IGNORANT to the fact will have their just reward love you children and teach them ❤ Not Hate because We aren't Born RACIST Racism is taught in the home.! GOD Bless
Continue to share these videos on your social media. As as for your children, have them invite kids from different cultures to your home, indulge them in activities, museums, festivals, etc. where they can participate, see and learn different things, taste different foods, etc. I truly believe that we need to focus on the children, for they are the adults of tomorrow. Bonjour depuis Haïti ! 😀🇭🇹
I want to grab Story, hug her and tell her she is so loved. This is a beautiful story. America we need to do better for these children and all children, adults, PEOPLE in this country and beyond. I'm white I have privilege and I'm learning how to be honest with myself and do better 💗🙏
"they changed us more than we feel like we changed anything"....my heart just melted 💔
As a white woman married to a Hispanic man I really appreciated this. My husband and I are looking into adoption and we weren’t sure about adopting a race different from ours because we worried that they might lose a piece of themselves. But I treasure the point of kids being raised with enough love and having experience with their culture makes a happy family. Thank you for this video.
It confuses the child the do have a senses of emptiness yes they live their parents but anyone can tell you your beautiful but because you don’t look like them there will always be a sense of emptiness and displacement if a child is black ONLY a black person can teach them about their culture hair skin how to handle certain situations or someone that studied African/ African American/ Caribbean cultures which are beautiful cultures
@@NelliLowe
See people like you are part of the problem, and people like you keep racism going. You heard Story the little girl say it didn’t matter if her parents where white because they love her and look pass the race. Like Emmanuel said just because the parents are white they can still teach their children black culture. How does a doctor become a doctor ? By getting educated, same thing applies. So according to what you said we should keep black or mixed, or monitory children in the foster system because white people can’t teach them about their culture ?? Wow
@@Hugo-Hernandez you didn't take your time and read my post I NEVER said that the children shouldn't be adopted I said some of the children deal with a struggle of their culture at some point yes you're parents can tell you that you are beautiful etc but they cannot prepare you for the struggles of being black the adoptive parent will have to bring that child around individuals of that race to explain the struggles is all im saying. If I had a white adoptive mother and I came home and told her someone told me im too dark or my hair is too kinky or someone called me a N word she can talk until she is blue but because they don't look like you or haven't experienced that as the child you are going to feel like you don't have anyone to relate too. You jump to conclusions and thing everyone is racist instead of following up with a question. Its amazing that all children no matter what race are able to be love by an adoptive parent I have cousins that are adopted that are mixed with Chinese and our family let her learn more about her culture and brang her around family friends because she wanted to talk to people she could relate too
When Story cried, I cried 💔😔. Thank you for having this necessary uncomfortable conversation. This family radiates love, I see those children are their parents world ❤️.
Mr Acho... man you are the greatest. I love your show and I learn and lot . Also after I learnt from you, I go on a teaching mission. Love your work ... namaste from nepal 🇳🇵
I love this video, but also I’m gonna point out that this family has fresh kicks 😍
lmao yes
All of 'em!! 🔥🔥🔥
facts lol
I said the same thing
I loved that part too too. I was like alright now 🎉
While Story was sharing her feelings and thoughts, my heart broke. I was crying so hard with her and had an overwhelming urge to want to give her a hug. No child should ever have to live with the kind of fear that our children of color have to live with. I'm a 4th-grade teacher and I saw the faces of my students as these young people were speaking. I love that these kids had the courage to speak their truth and I hope they continue to have that courage because I am listening. I am learning. I am doing my best to do better.
Thank you. 💗
Children of color don't have to live in FEAR. This is the BS the media is feeding you. I'm so sick of this horrible narrative that is continuing to be told in this country. The problem is, it's not true and now we are feeding this to Black children IN THIS DAY AND AGE, crippling them with FEAR and causing psychological damage that cannot be erased. As a Black woman raising 3 Black children, I cannot imagine damaging my kids like this - these are CHILDREN not science experiments. How will they ever have self esteem or grown up to be successful while carrying this unnecessary burden? She should be playing in a field of flowers, soaking up the sun, not listening to THAT.
I wanted to put my arms through the screen, hug that little girl and tell her to close her ears. Unfortunately, she has to hear that every day of her life from her parents. Very sad.
@@Natrunsfar I apologize for my poor choice of words. I shouldn't have used the words "have to live in fear." I try to choose my words carefully and I made a mistake with my word choice. Though my message stays the same. My heart broke for this young lady and I want to learn more to do better. That part has not changed.
@@dmctgrlly Yes, and I hope that my words didn't come across as anger toward you. I think I just feel like America thinks Black people have a horrible existence in this country and I want to say that it is not true ALL THE TIME. I know there have been some bad things that have happened with police and I am in no way negating that. I do think it is important to have a positive outlook (what has happened with police is a small percentage - the media blows it up) and also we have to highlight the positive things happening in our country. I also realize it is hard to do that with this crazy year. But I ask you to think, what if the tables were turned and you had to constantly hear how horrible it was to be white? Especially if you knew your story and many, many others wasn't negative... I am not a person that gets on chat rooms and writes opinions, but I felt it was necessary to speak out. Not every Black person feels plagued by racism. I love people for who they are on the inside and I have felt that they love me for who I am - not what I look like. Ugh, there is so much to say. My heart broke too for this young girl. But, it's not going to help if she is told be her parents to be scared of walking outside. That is not right... Thank you for wanting to learn, and I hope you learn both sides - mostly the good.
Wow thank you for steps to becoming a greater world
This program proves that Love is hotter, stronger, and more brillant than the star that shines 93 million miles away from earth. Thank you Mr Acho.
I'm excited! Hopefully this is a much longer conversation.
Story crying broke my heart ... she’s so adorable and sweet