Thinks about my bestie leaving a $20 tip on a $25 bill the other night when we went out for drinks. She grew up with nothing and worked hard to have nice things and money to enjoy. She spreads the love and I love her
How is it wasteful? You are spreading wealth to a working class American who lives on tips 🤷🏼♀️ Isn’t that how the GOP’s beloved “trickle down economics” works?
Re: the minimalism discussion, I think it's also important to note that in order to be minimalist, you have to have enough disposable income to be able to replace things quickly. Think about it: if you only own one winter jacket (as an example) and that jacket is significantly damaged or lost, it's no biggie if you have the money to go and get a new one right away. But if you can't drop money on a new jacket right now and that was your only one? You're kind of screwed. This is why some lower income people keep literally everything, even stuff that isn't being used and hasn't been for years: you never know when you'll need that thing again.
Probably to an extent it's true. I mean keeping something because it's broken and you aren't the kind of person who will ever fix it, isn't benefitting even someone who can't afford to replace it. This is why I will own a bunch of king size sheets and sneakers however. I don't want to pay close to $100 for even moderately decent sheets, so on the rare occasions where there are good quality sheets at the thrift in patterns I like, I will buy them. And because I don't want to buy the $130 sneakers I like whenever mine wear out, if I see ones that fit for under $10 at the thrift, I'm going to buy them. And I wear my sneakers until they are literally falling apart. I also decided to keep my second older car even after getting a "new" old car since insurance and registration are so cheap and if one needs a big repair, it's not urgent.
@@TheeBamse Well….I think if you buy a smoothie everyday it would actually benefit you to buy the blender, yeah? Because you would be making use of it everyday. It’s a part of your life and routine. But it’s a waste of money to buy a smoothie and produce trash when it’s not necessary. Minimalism allows you to have things, just not things in excess and abundance. I think that blender would be a wonderful addition.
This is it. I love it as an aesthetic so I guess it describes me but I'm privileged enough to be able to afford good quality furniture, kitchenware etc that lasts for years and I don't keep having to replace. If I needed a new sofa tomorrow I could buy one. That doesn't make me smarter or better it just makes me privileged.
@@LoveAndSnapple I think the point they’re trying to make is that if you have the money, you can just buy a smoothie and not have to own a blender in order to be more minimalist. It’s more practical, and cheaper, to just own the blender, but if you have it out on your counter it can mess with the * a e s t h e t i c * of minimalism, especially if it’s an older one you had to buy second hand. Basically, the point is that minimalism can actually be quite expensive depending on how it’s approached. Approached well it can cost less and have less environmental impact, but approached poorly it emphasizes looks over practicality, costing more in the long run (both in dollars and environmental impact).
Agreed...a lot of the time, minimalism seems to be more about the aesthetic rather than focusing on living with less (which is fine if that's what someone is into, but I think intentionality is really important)
I considered myself a minimalist when I was poor, but I think I’ve always questioned. “Am I a minimalist or am I just poor?” It definitely forces one to become extremely selective in what we choose to spend money on. Adopting a wardrobe of only a few colors was necessary for me since I only owned like ten pieces of clothing. I worked hard on refining my values and spent money on things like books or novel experiences and less on things. In a way, I really cherish that feeling. Of course I’m in a better place now financially in the middle class, but it is easier to over purchase when there is less of a financial consequence involved, leading to guilt and shame, even anxiety. I find that it’s happened much more frequently than I thought it would, especially after years of discipline and deep work on my values. I’ve adopted a broader view of what owning things means to me, and a lot of grace with myself.
@@authenticallytrish Did you find calling yourself a minimalist when you didn’t have money to be a positive thing? When I was on a strict budget and shopping with friends, I found it easier to say I didn’t want to buy things because I’m being intentional than saying I was broke. I think it’s one way for poor people to take control of their day to day financial decisions without letting everyone know they’re in a bad financial situation. Isn’t that a good thing?
I know, right? They could only get away with that once. Then it's "Oh, you're having a cook out? How nice. No, I can't make it. i can't afford you this week."
Ummm… but hosting parties is a skill. As a software engineer without that skill, if someone is doing the admin labor of organizing an event, I desperately want to be able to recognize that.
@@armorsmith43 I also work in STEM, and a lot of my friends operate that way. It's a shame to hear them called rude when being detail oriented is such a valuable trait in other situations.
I think it's a great point that a reason we're not having conversations about "pretty privilege" is because it would be hard to figure out who should take on that issue. If a person who is not conventionally attractive raises the topic, people may say they're using their looks as an excuse for why they're not successful (especially because an unattractive person would be less likely to garner sympathy). If an attractive person leads the conversation, people may not take the issue seriously or believe this is a "thing" (especially if people just see it as an attractive person bragging). Also, it should be noted that conventional "attractiveness" can be intertwined with racism, colorism and classism.
I mean, that happens with every sort of discussion about privilege. There's the Russell Brand quote “When I was poor and complained about inequality they said I was bitter; now that I'm rich and I complain about inequality they say I'm a hypocrite. I'm beginning to think they just don't want to talk about inequality.”
Moreover, it's not as "easy" a thing to overcome. People most of the time have no control over being attractive or average or unattractive, these things, besides being subjective, are (for the most part) out of our control, so it's not like we can say to someone stop being pretty/ugly or that we can effectively not do a double take when a model is trying to sell us a perfume. And not to mention that even though attractiveness has some common traits everywhere and for everyone, beauty standards change with time and among different cultures, so pretty can look very different in other places making it difficult to actually clock pretty privilege when it happens. Of course it could be controlled in some settings but i believe that it will never be fully eradicated because our brains are wired in a way that more or less makes us instinctively want to pay more attention to and trust more and want to be around pretty people.
I have a good friend who's White & from a Hollywood movie family and who has a disability that shows physically. I'm "conventionally" attractive but originally from the hood. We're in the same profession and have had this looks conversation several times. We're both very privileged in different ways but I think we're professional peers because they're undermined by ableism. And my conventional attractiveness has not eviscerated the reality of my race, gender, and the zip code I was born in. Granted we're still both very successful but we both had to overcome & still face real barriers based on constructs. I guess my point is that it is funny how privilege plays out sometimes
@@Meloncov Wow and I thought people didn't care cause it was an ugly specking maybe we need to send in an all around average person to speck up about it.
The pretty privilege conversation is so interesting. IMO for women, there's like an ideal hotness level in any industry, where if you're less attractive, you're ignored, and if you're more attractive, you're not taken seriously. Also can we get a "salt life" sticker in the style of TFD?
this ^^ And in context. You can be that perfect in-between in some circles/situations and bleed into the less or more attractive than the ideal in others.
Yes this - it’s tricky in the Bay Area especially - you have to like blend in but still be hot lol- I think here it’s like clear skin (but not heavy makeup)😅, nice clothes but unbranded (unless it’s Patagonia of course), and a good haircut are like musts in the work world But I’m still figuring it out lol
As an “old person” I would say do both. Give money to your kids if you can and your grandkids as well. And give it to them while you are alive. You get to enjoy their progress, education or whatever helps them.
Plus if you give it away while you're alive you don't have to pay that estate tax. Which, I am NOT against estate tax and 100% agree with Chelsea that it's too low, but let's be honest--if you are wealthy enough that your money would be estate taxed, you're probably wealthy enough to get around those taxes anyways....
@@kate-ne Depending on how much is given, somebody still might be liable for some sort of taxes. I don't know all the details, but if grandma is writing 10k checks regularly to Little Timmy, than somebody is probable gonna get taxed.
I read a study once that stated teachers even in elementary school show preference to the kids that are more attractive. Pretty privilege starts as soon as you step out of your home into the real world. It's a truly unfair situation. This probably also makes it harder for pretty people to realize the benefit they are receiving because it starts when they are so young.
I've been told that I was pretty my entire life and I had several teachers treat me like absolute shit growing up lol. I knew I was a favorite of some people growing up but the absolute dichotomy in treatment as a child was demoralizing. Having a 'weird' personality seems to overshadow the pretty in some instances. I still have low self esteem, and I question every interaction I have to this day 🤷 It is hard to see if I have gotten special treatment most of the time simply because it's not possible to witness every interaction or judge motivations. I have noticed it happen but more often than not I hear about or am told of the difference in interactions later on.
@@anaerobic Same, I'd like to see this study and how it was conducted. I had some teachers that were cool with me and some teachers that treated me like absolute crap 🤷🏻♀️
@@ilahmache well a crap personality will supercede prettiness after awhile. A teacher who is tired of dealing with an annoying kid's BS will probably cease to treat them better based on looks.
I recently had the conversation in another videos comment section of how being conventionally attractive greatly affects perceptions of poor people. As long as a person is seen as “attractive” troubled pasts are just that - a bit of character. But if you are poor and Look Poor (my favorite example is dental beauty standards) that same level of compassion, interest and favorability is not extended to you
On vegan leather: I do get your point about "using more out of less suffering", but unfortunately leather now comes from far more sources than just meat or dairy cattle. There's also a huge amount of cattle bred exclusively for their skins, and the most "luxurious" soft leather generally comes from calves or even unborn calves! And while cows provide the bulk of sold leather, many other animals supplement this, from other common farmed animals, to exotic animals, to kangaroos. So for someone not wanting to harm animals it doesn't make sense to buy it, but even for people who consume animal products, it's worth looking at your choice to buy leather - unfortunately there is even less labelling and sourcing available regarding where your leather came from - do you know if it came from a meat farm in your own country, or was flown from a meat farm on the other side of the world, or from leather cattle, or even cattle at all? It's also not free of a human cost! Leather production in many countries is an extremely toxic process, tanning leather produces a whole lot of waste that harms the environment, *plus* the workers are exposed to these toxic chemicals and fumes with little to no protection. It's interesting to read about if you care to do so. Now obviously the leather industry isn't the only offender here, the textile industry as a whole has SO MUCH to answer for in terms of safe working conditions and fair pay. But I definitely don't think leather is the way to go if you want to make a kind or sustainable choice. And there's more than just plastic substitutes for leather out there - I know plastic production is not great or sustainable either. But there are high quality plant leather goods available more and more these days.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think she was talking about vintage/used leather products when she said this? Like, an animal was already killed to make this item, getting a second use out of it is better than buying something new, whether it's vegan leather or actual leather?
Thanks for sharing. I simply googled Vegan Leather and everything From PETA to Harper's Bazaar had a definition and controversy about polymer substitute leather to the Vogue Business which mentions the cost affordability of low cost PVC leather. Honestly, at this point I would ask Ed Begley, Jr. and still end up with the same answer.
I would lose my MIND if someone invited me over then charged me!! Like even in college when we were all broke we'd do potluck parties or just figure if I was hosting this time someone else would host the next time and it'd all even out, I can't imagine charging omg
Right?! It's one thing if it's agreed upon before, but AFTER????? I am never inviting them anywhere, and I am certainly not accepting an invitation from them! I didn't budget as if an invitation to a friends house would cost me x amount because they wanted to splurge on a fancy meal for their GUEST! Needless to say, this has happened, and I was extremely offended. They also charged alcohol I didn't drink because "I know you didn't drink it, but I kinda spent a lot on this for *us* " I paid and left, but I did not forgive or forget. I had no say in what was being planned, so I should not have to pay as the person who was invited.
Right? If you want to plan a party but have everyone pay their share, you need to establish that ahead of time so they have the option to opt out, not spring it on them AFTER the party is over. That's a completely bonkers-level of rude.
I feel an extreme amount of second hand embarrassment for everyone involved in this scenario. If my friends did this to me I would pay then promptly block them on everything
I am the type of person who would tell these people no if they asked me to give me money for groceries after being invited to their home. They would probably stop being my friend but it would probably be for the best.
God I HATE this! I've found it also depends on location. I'm from the midwest where it's just give and take (oh, I've got this one, you get next time) and a very guest oriented culture. I moved to the East Coast and made some friends and I've felt like accepting anything comes with a hidden fee (oh I got bagels... that'll be $3 for the bagel and cream cheese, oh can you give me a couple dollars for drinking a couple cokes out of my 12 pack) and it's exhausted! Oh, and god the bartering of multiple items! "Oh I such for the apartment which cost $12 and you got blank for the apartment which cost $10 so why don't you give me $1 and call it even?" Honestly, I'd rather just split everything 50/50 than balance the books like that.
I do think the "you're not ugly, you're just poor" meme best encapsulates this. Very few ppl are true "knockouts" and those that are, are clearly in modeling/acting/influencer where they can best capitalize on that and spend alot of time and money to best preserve their looks. Most "average" ppl are required to invest alot of time and money to get the hair, makeup, food, exercise, cosmetic procedures and clothes in order to increase their "attractiveness". That said, some will have to spend alot more money and time depending on race/genetics/health/etc but it does play a bigger part in our society than most ppl are willing to admit. A good portion of our consumer economy is comprised on capitalizing on our insecurity when it comes to "attractiveness".
$10,000 nose job, $7000 invisalign braces, $3,000 laser hair removal. Let alone $3,000 on clothes every year, $3,000 makeup, $6000 yearly hair if I were living in my fantasy life. “beauty” is expensive
Yess! Thank you for saying that! I was interning with a firm right after my bachelors, moved to the capital city, from my third tier town, and goodness that was such a reality check. At a super high end event, the bosses kind of didn't acknowledge I as a part of the team, another intern was acknowledged. We were asked to dress casual because we'd have to run around. My understanding of casual was casual, sneakers, pair of denims and a sweater. She turned up wearing a blazer, denims and boots. Cut to the next event where I did flash appropriate brands and 'invested' in looking better, the treatment immediately changed.
All content creators know that having your pet in the shot increases engagement with video. I love Mona she is a gem. Also thank you for your reasoned non-cliche views!!
Now I understand, I'm getting so annoyed with the pet thing on TH-cam, every video it's 5 minutes of a cat or dog looking absolutely annoyed because they have to stand there to increase views, I just want to go straight to the point of the video, glad that i can fast-forward.
As a vegan, I completely agree about buying vintage or used leather over new real or synthetic leather. Less demand for new materials is the way to go!
At one point I had 5 fur coats! All of them in great condition purchased at vintage/thrift shops when I lived in Paris. Now I'm very opposed to wearing real fur (all the coats were sold or donated when I moved to the south of France, along with most of my furniture, books and other items no longer needed) but I never felt guilty about wearing them since these purchases never directly supported the fur industry or taking the lives of more animals.
Or you can just not buy any of it...its only expensive if you buy it and you don't need leather or fur coat, you want it. Veganism or minimalism is only expensive if you live according to your wants and not your needs. You can wear a regular jacket and live a very good life, promise.
I disagree. It is not as bad as directly paying for animal abuse and killing, but it still increases the demand for it. If you buy it, then the person who wants to buy leather but checks the vintage store first will buy a new one because you already have the vintage one.
As a vegan, as well, I keep hearing people say that leather and other animal products are better than plastic alternatives, but I'm honestly not sure what the animal products are treated with that might affect how they biodegrade, or the production itself. Those considerations should be weighted into these decisions, too. It may be roughly equivalent in terms of eco impact to acquire secondhand leather or secondhand plastic or secondhand plant materials.
My amazing in laws gave each of their children a pre-inheritance when they bought their first house. It was a very kind and surprising gift. My family are straight up poor. I had a panic attack in my youth and googled “can you inherit debt”.
As a conventionally unattractive person (in NYC), sometimes having confidence in yourself is viewed as "conceit" or "delusion". More than one of us have heard ppl talking behind our backs about it.
Ești din România? 🤔 Eu aș spune că nu se aplică chestia asta la noi în țară, doar atunci când menționezi că vei face 'cinste', dacă sărbătorești ceva, de exemplu.
@@iuliaionelapetcu1411 Da , sunt din Romania si eu asa am invatat. Am aplicat aceasta regula toata viata, inclusiv in lunga perioada in care am trait in strainatate. Trebuie sa ai in vedere ca noi suntem din generatii diferite si multe lucruri s-au schimbat de-a lungul anilor, inclusiv cutume si obiceiuri. E doar opinia mea, cu siguranta ca tanara generatie isi croieste acum propriile reguli si e firesc sa fie asa. All the best!
I really don't like this sentiment at all. They're already providing a place for us to be, I'm more than happy to split the cost of food or whatever. My friends and I also tend to help the hosts to shop, cook and wash dishes to make it as lite of a burden as possible. This makes people more than happy to host at a whim and as such we can meet more often.
I’m American and I’ve never been asked to pay for a party’s food if it wasn’t expressly stated it was some kind of pot luck. It’s expected to bring a drink or dessert though.
as a midwesterner from a state that's dangerously close to Iowa, & as someone who was raised in NYS & as someone who knows that a large plurality of American models come from the middlebits I'm just gonna say y'all can hate & I understand why
How many of the tall, pretty people in LA and NYC are originally from there? Not many. They’ve all come from Iowa or Indiana or Ohio or somewhere else boring in the middle of the country.
@@lulubelle65 Yes, but they move to the coasts and stay and breed, and have done so for at least six generations, so now the coasts are more populated with pretty people.
Talking about pretty privileged, My experience is more of “looking wealthy” privilege. I can see how people treating me in my well put together semi formal clothes compared to my comfortable look. I talked about getting free stuff from service and getting a respect from strangers.
The way you defined intentionality - that’s exactly what minimalism is. It’s spot on. There’s a lot of confusion with minimalism, because it can be presented in a way that ONLY focuses on owning next to nothing. Poverty is not synonymous with minimalism, because the ability to purchase things is not a choice here. That is not to say that poverty and minimalism are mutually exclusive. The core value of minimalism intentionality, and it goes so much deeper than the number of clothes you have in the closet. It’s really a process of reflecting on your decisions and defining what your priorities are. Minimalism is not limited to just stuff, it really trickles down into how we perceive relationships, our life choices, and figuring out the motivating factors for why we do what we do. It’s a practice that sets you free as you reflect, and there’s really no end point. It’s a lifelong prioritization of ourselves and others, and recognizing that our things serve to enhance our lives but not control them. A lot of leaders would benefit from embracing these values because they focus on what truly matters.... and it’s not STUFF! also, if throw pillows make you smile and you enjoy them, you’re actually already in line with what minimalism is all about :)
As an avid reader I feel like a lot of books have difficulty being adapted into movies because of the inner monologue. Characters are often going through a lot inside, which can change how they are viewed when you are on the outside, seeing their face and not being in their head. It's why Harry Potter seems nicer in the movies than the books, because in the books you see his snarky thoughts.
When my friends ask me if I'm frugal with my money, I tell them that I'm intentional with spending my money. I wish people would understand that there's more than one way to make chicken.
As young adults where we’re all struggling, my old roommate had a sort of policy for a food get togethers to bring something or give the host $5 to buy more food for the event. Establishing that ahead of the party always helped people plan to their own means and time!
for food get togethers, I think it's pretty unspoken that everyone should bring something, whether it's a bottle of wine, homecooked food, or some other food item, and that the host doesnt venmo request after lmao
So on the ethics of individual purchases---buying from a manufacturer with good labor practices isn't gonna end labor abuse, but it does mean some people are employed under fair conditions who otherwise wouldn't be. That's not a systematic fix, but it's a real change in the lives of those particular people.
I think the whole concept of tipping is absolutely RIDICULOUS. It's the restaurant's way of saying "we're letting you decide if the waiter will make a living wage today, yay". I'm sorry, WHAT? Since it's already "expected" of people to tip at the very least 15-20%, why not incorporate that into the price to begin with, and then let the customer decide if they want to add something extra for the excellent service. Is that too difficult for americans to grasp?!
Why not just increase the pay standards. Tipping in America is ridiculous! It's not something common across the world, especially Asia. Here you tip to say thank you for the good service not because you need to pay your portion of the waiters rent
I would love to move towards no tipping and I'm supportive of restaurants that try but it's been really hard for places to stick to it. I feel that it's a symptom of a larger issue of lack of society safety nets. Removing tipping shouldn't result in hugely increased costs for the business while the server ALSO makes less overall money which as far as I can tell, is usually how it ends up.
ive been saying this for years since I was 18 (I'm 33 now) and every time I'm met with disdain. esp from friends who've worked in the restaurant industry. like i FEEL you but it's not my responsibility to pay you what you don't make. that's at its core a shitty job industry that's set up that way. i want to tip because I feel generous in gratitude but most often than not it's out of spite and begrudging obligation and I straight up resent restaurants b/c of it.
Oh, I (and probably many other Americans) agree wholeheartedly. I would love to move away from tipping as expected wages and just go toward a practice of tipping as a rare treat for exceptional service. It's silly for the reason you gave, but it's also really silly because it gets really confusing what services are expected to be tipped and how much you are supposed to be tipping them. Waitstaff, hotel cleaning services, manicurists, hairdressers, bar tenders, cab drivers, valets, etc. Even Americans get confused by whether they are supposed to tip for something and, if so, how much. (I got a dog recently and found myself googling whether it's standard to tip dog groomers!) I would so much rather move away from it. But tipping is very deeply ingrained in American service work at this point. Shifting the culture in that regard is not at all easy.
Yeah, I don’t think it’s that most Americans WANT the system of tipping to be set up the way that it is. It’s confusing and annoying. Making and implementing the change is the likely the real issue here.
On your first point about tipping, it was the poor college students and younger people that were kinder and tipped well compared to older wealthier people.
In college when we'd go out in a big group, we'd all be ordering just a small amount of food (cuz we poor) and tip basically a 100% tip to make up for it.
@@cbpd89 I don't understand the tipping thing in America, it's so weird, you have to tip to make up for having a small order, you forced to tip every time even if you don't like the service? Here in Europe we tip if had a special service or if we want, it's not a obligation and we don't have a specific percentage.
@@afrikan_criola1923 Waiters are paid below minimum wage so tips are the majority of their wage. This means wait staff depend on the mood of strangers in order to afford rent.
Early on in my career when I was cute (not anymore lol), I was “cute,” attractive but at a very approachable level. I could see where some managers or leaders were easier on me, or more likely to develop a friendly relationship with me-maybe because I was cute. However, three times in my first year of work, I was sexually harassed by coworkers or a business partner. Now, I’m not really considered cute, so maybe I’ve lost some benefit, but I also haven’t been the target of harassment in a long time.
I’m 24, trying to start a career, and also very pretty. I’ve been dealing with so much sexual harassment and just general bullshit from male boomers. The ceo of my former company asked if I was a virgin on a Zoom call with the entire company, as an example. I just started working for an entirely women run organization and I’m valued as a human for the first time in my professional life. I have a lot of privileges as a hot young woman, but there’s a real downside too.
I’m fat, like obese fat. And I’m fat by choice, when I was in my early teens I tried to lose weight, and I did but the attention I got from strangers made me so uncomfortable that I gained that weight. This is no longer the sole reason why I’m fat but it’s still a considerable reason.
I felt this on a deep level. I’m a busty woman and when I was thin and young I could not walk down the street without being harassed. I think subconsciously I gained weight to make it stop. Now I’m older and want to be thin again.
The term “pretty privilege” might be new but awareness and studies of it have existed for a very long time. It might have been broken up into individual topics and not all in one place e.g. the example you cited around CEOs’ average heights, or others e.g. conventionally attractive ppl receiving laxer criminal penalties, or cute kids having an easier time at school, but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t been being talked about.
The studies exist, and in academia/sociology circles, i think it's commonly known, but i don't think it's really talked about broadly the way that white or male privilege now are
There is a famous and since replicated study about children learning more from attractive teachers. Ditto for taller people being given more responsibility and leadership opportunity. Imagine my lack of surprise when I started working at a very large bank in NYC in my mid-30s (in a lower-level role despite a graduate degree and related experience) and felt like I had barged into a supermodel convention whenever I went to the cafeteria. No lie - there were so many former Olympians working there that they had an entire week of different lunchtime panel discussions so they could all take part.
Especially for women. The last corporation I worked for almost all female leaders were tiny blonde tan women. The exceptions were token asian american and african american women. It made me feel like I wouldn't be able to succeed there. I had 20 times the work accomplishments and industry awards as my blonde co-workers (who struggeled with basic concepts and were constantly flirting with married middle aged men there) because I'm chubby and brunette I wasn't promoted to leadership roles and they were. I was so happy to leave and saw multiple other non- blonde tan thin women leave for likely the same reason.
It kills me when people insist that because the wealthy worked hard for their money, there should be nobody just changing the tax system to something that allows all hard working people to keep a portion of their money that allow them to have a roof over their heads and food for their families. Why are there tax laws that let billionaires write off their losses and write off their rental properties and write off depreciation on their private jets while the rest of us never have tax plan overhauls that allow them to keep more of their money. Everyone loves the SALT deduction that makes the wealthy pay more, but it doesn’t because they have other laws to float their money right back to them. All the middle and lower middle New York State residents I know have had their taxes increased by 3,000 to 10.000 so again the rich gain on the middle class. How do we let the grave injustice in this tax plan stand?
Why should we be care about what those 'less fortunate' do with their money? No number of "fun" purchases as defined by a single mum on food stamps will ever approach the sheer environmental impact of a private plane or boat, just for a start. The rich can do more for good or evil, thus they 'earned' the burden of being watched more critically. Much is expected from those to whom much has been given.
A great vlog, as always. I love the phrase 'nickle and diming'. Last summer a friend was admiring the colour of our recently painted lounge and said she'd love to paint her hall the same colour. As we had a good amount of paint left over, I said she could use some of ours. Then she said she hated decorating. I love it so I offered to paint her hall too. Next, she said we'd need a new paintbrush. I told her not to worry as I had plenty already. She insisted on buying a cheap paintbrush and then asked me for the money (1,82 dollars), pointing out that it would be mine to take home as she'd never use it again. I reluctantly paid up but, of course, I never did get that paintbrush as she wanted to hang onto it to touch up (she'd poured some additional paint into a jam jar). The whole experience kind of tainted our relationship, especially when - a few weeks later - she announced she'd need the paint back from me as she'd like the lounge painted in the same colour! That was the point where I realised who the mug was and said 'no'!!
One of my biggest pet peeves is when opponents of the estate tax say “that’s the government double taxing the money!” Like, yeah. All money is taxed a million times. You pay income taxes when you receive money, then sales tax when you buy something, and then the company you bought something from also pays taxes (at least theoretically). In addition to Chelsea’s point of why are the kids of rich parents more deserving of the money, why are they entitled to not have to pay taxes on the money they didn’t work for?
I once overheard some rich people saying inheritance tax was taxing the money twice. Most only see what they want to see. It was almost as if they don't see their kids as separate people, just another possession/extension of themselves. They can't relate to working so hard at some crappy job for crappy pay and paying 25% tax on that money while some rich kid does absolutely nothing but get free money AND get it at a lower tax rate! Infuriating!
I definitely agree with you. The only time I feel weird about increasing the estate tax is if the person only left behind a primary residence. Like if you’re middle to lower class and your grandma passes and leaves you her house, you shouldn’t have to sell the house to pay the estate tax. IMO the estate tax shouldnt be a flat rate but change based on how much you have and how much you’re getting. If you have hella assets and grandmas house is going to be a 3rd property for you, then that person should be taxed more than the college kid who only owns a 2k beater car and a laptop
@@seabreeze4559 The estate tax only applies to estates over $11.7 million. Additionally, the estate tax is indexed like the federal income tax, so the higher the value of estates over the exemption amount, the higher a rate they pay.
THANK YOU for talking about attractive privilege. I just.. yes. So well said. It's a hard one. And I think that the subjective nature is what makes it that much more difficult. Unlike class or ethnicity that can be easily identified. But as a whole, yes. I do think it's like any other privilege where it doesn't mean that your life is perfect, you are automatically confident, or you don't have to work hard.. it just means that your hard work goes way further than those who aren't perceived as attractive. Like, has anyone noticed that we only love a certain group when we find the most attractive person of that group. We love big girls when they look like Ashley Graham, we love vitiligo girls when they look like Winnie Harlow, we love dark skin girls when we look like v secret models, we love breastfeeding moms when they look like Chrissy Teigan, and so on. I see so often that we love an oppressed group when we find ones that society deems the exception. I know I sound so bitter but it's just because this topic is finally coming to light.
The coffee and cocktail thing has probably more to do with a certain kind of victimhood. We all have friends who moan about how it is everyone else's fault that they don't have money, but go on spending a ton on useless stuff. I don't have time for this, mate.
I bought an espresso machine on sale last year for 300$ and haven't bought coffee from the store since. Honestly, it saved me so much money, it's one of the best purchases I made. Plus those fancy starbucks dessert drinks are terrible for your health and wallet. We can criticize the whole "5$ daily coffee" discourse for not taking into consideration the systemic issues but it still doesn't make sense to buy coffee every. single. day.
I wouldn't mind going to a party where everyone had to chip in for the expense as long as that arrangement was made clear before the party. I have been in uncomfortable situations where I was the "rich person" getting a free meal from "poorer" people.
Bring a gift for your host and be a good guest...no worries. Positive vibes from New Hampshire and remember to be kind to each other and yourself during this pandemic and social crisis
I don’t have much but I still love to treat my friend and family once in a while, no matter how much everyone makes. It’s not about the cost, it’s about being generous when possible
Yes! I totally get that. I'm a college student so I fully expect some of my (pre-COVID) get togethers to include a fee. We're all broke, I'll chip in $10 for drinks and food. But some of my friends are much wealthier and don't have that financial stress and it always strikes me as odd what they decide to make me chip in for or not to chip in for. It's strange!
Something my friends often do as hosts is provide food, sometimes snacks only, beer and soft drinks (tap water, soda, juices) and ask people to bring whatever alcohol they want to drink because that tends to be most expensive, people can bring their own alcohol and they usually share most/all of it with the others.
The process of making real leather is actually very resource intensive and harmful for the environment. In that sense it is even worse for the environment than the typical faux (plastic) leather, although real leather tends to be more durable. However, in my experience, good quality vegan (plastic) leather is much more durable than fast fashion faux (plastic) leather. And of course there are some brands that are already using plant-based leather made from pineapple and cacti, although that tends to be more expensive. So not all faux leather is created equal. Personally, I would buy second-hand or buy vegan leather.
Faux leather made from pineapples, mushrooms etc is 99.9% coated in plastic, and the argument of plastic being better for the environment than leather is laughable, the gases that plastic puts off in the milliom of years it takes to degrade is far worse than a poor cow burping
@@caoimhenimhuireadhaigh1303 i wish the issue with leather production was just a poor cow burping! unfortunately, there are many issues surrounding the leather industry, especially globally, such as the use of toxic chemicals in leather tanning (there are multiple methods to tan leather hides, but one popular method uses chromium) that are often not disposed of properly; the exploitation of workers, including children in many countries, in tanneries resulting in serious injuries and exposure to harmful chemicals, as well as the exploitation of workers in garment factors that make the final leather goods. that’s not even getting into the environmental issues with animal agriculture, such as pollution, loss of native flora/fauna, the amount of water it takes to support raising cattle, or the types of abuse the animals face. there’s a lot of info about the issues surrounding leather production from global labor organizations and environmental organizations! there’s also a very good documentary by the german news channel dw on luxury fashion called “luxury: behind the mirror of high end fashion” that investigates some labor conditions in italy and animal farming conditions in china
@@folieadork I don't disagree with you, but there is just as many problems with the production of plastic materials in those same areas, workers being exposed to toxic chemicals, environments being destroyed by the waste from production (both by chemicals and physical items). The pollution and degradation of environments by the production of plastic is horrific. Let's not forget that it's made from oil, a finite resource, and the horrific things done in the pursuit of oil e.g. wars that have displaced and killed millions of people, the ruination of sacred lands, oil spills killing marine wildlife. You have to take into account from start to finish the impacts of both materials, and to be blunt, there hasn't been a war over leather in a couple thousand years, if my preliminary research is correct
@@caoimhenimhuireadhaigh1303 - The amount of oil used to make plastic is small compared to the amount of fuel needed to raise animals. 1/3 of global fuel is required for animal husbandry. Let's also remember that vegan leather doesn't have to be plastic. But more importantly is that if you truly want to be eco-friendly, you'd avoid leather altogether, vegan or otherwise. I don't get why we're reduced to only 2 choices when there are a multitude of other materials that can be used.
@@caoimhenimhuireadhaigh1303 - Btw it's more than burps that are negatively associated with cows. They make millions of tons of fecal waste that is either sprayed into the air causing locals to develop asthma, lung cancer, pulmonary fibrosis, etc. - OR it's stored on land, which overexposes the soil to nitrogen and causes degradation of nutrients - OR its washed away as run-off into our rivers & waterways, which leads to algae blooms & hypoxic dead zones that kill marine life. The Gulf Sea under Mexico has the largest dead zone. The swimmers at the Rio Olympics in Brazil couldn't compete since the algae blooms were so bad, bc they could suffocate. It's a domino effect that impacts us numerous ways. And that's not all. In order to breed enough cattle to feed populations, you need to breed ALOT of cattle. Nearly 35% of land depletion is due to grazing. And if you want to feed 1000 lb cattle, you need to grow alot of food. You'd need 14x to 21x the amount of land to feed cattle than growing grains or vegetables to feed humans. In fact, there's not enough arable land in America anymore, that Big Ag has resorted to "corporate land grabs" in other countries - which displaces Indigenous people and tribes into homelessness. Up to 91% of Amazonian deforestation is due to animal agriculture. Or how about the fact that environmental activists who fight Animal Ag are assassinated anywhere from 2 to 4 times every year. Animal Ag is a MAFIA, they have the govt by the balls bc they control legislation via lobbyists, and the regulating bodies of the USDA, FDA, CDC, OSHA, etc. who are supposed to police them are in bed with them. Oh I keep remembering more ways that cattle hurt the environment. Another way is that they need lots of omega 3s to grow, so they're fed fish pellets. That's right, the #1 predator in the ocean is actually the cow. The amount of overfishing needed to fatten up cows is causing pollution and extinction in our oceans. And all bc people want a burger or leather couch. Now add the fact that raising animals requires 1/3 of our global freshwater resources and 1/3 of our global fuel source. Do you still think natural leather is better for the environment? You know what's crazy, I'm not even vegan. But I'm definitely for us cutting out as much meat, dairy, and other animal products as is personally feasible.
I’ve been vegan for 5+ years for all the reasons, and the leather discussion is a tricky one. There’s a lot of nuance to it. The point about standard “vegan leather” just being plastic is a fair point. It does have a host of its own environmental issues. And even within that, there’s complexity. For example, PU is a less toxic option than PVC. You can also get recycled options, like I have a pair of adidas leather look sneakers that are from recycled plastic. But yes, some people absolutely just whack vegan branding on it for marketing, and sometimes it’s technically not even, if you break it down to components like glue. But then leather production is also shocking for the environment. It uses a lot of water and chemicals for the tanning etc, not to mention the environmental impact of raising the cattle in the first place. And as far as I’m aware, leather, dairy and meat are often from different cattle raised for different purposes, unless it’s really cheap quality stuff sometimes I suppose, or a company who has gone out of their way to source leather from cows slaughtered for meat. Logically speaking, I think you’re right. Second hand leather is the overall best option environmentally and ethically. But I personally am grossed out touching real leather, I’ve tried to get over that but it makes me shudder. But regardless of being vegan, I would never judge someone for buying second hand leather. I genuinely support it. I think it’s a very good option. This does then kind of segue into other things like fur… which I think then becomes even more tricky, because even if you’re buying it second hand, you’re normalising wearing it, and people aren’t going to know it’s second hand just from seeing it and then may go out and buy new fur. Whereas I feel like with leather, it’s less obvious by looking at it whether it’s real or fake. And actually to circle back, then there’s the whole growing industry of vegan plant based leather, which I think is very cool. Such as pinatex, which is made from pineapple leaves from crops that are already being grown and harvested, and there’s even mushroom leather and all sorts of things coming out. So what’s cool about them is that they are biodegradable. So then it comes down to buying new plant based leather vs second hand real leather. Which often is going to also be largely decided by budget. And then there’s always the option of buying second hand standard “vegan leather.” I found a fantastic PU leather jacket second hand, but I also will say the neck has peeled a little. That’s another problem. I don’t think there’s an obvious THIS IS BEST answer, essentially you have to weigh up the pros and cons of each and your personal values and just try to make the best decision possible. And I mean simply just not buying anything sometimes is the best option (though not always fun or even practical/possible). TLDR: it’s complex, as a vegan I’m not against second hand leather
For me the thing that puts leather above any of the vegan options is just the fact that it lasts! Even if it's more environmentally damaging it can go through 3 or 4 (or more) owners in it's lifetime before finally hitting the landfill. As far as I know there is NO faux leather that lasts like the real thing. The plasticizers used in its production are inherently unstable and will dry and disentograte no matter if it's worn or not. I completely swore off faux leathers after I had a very expensive pair of boots fall apart after only 2 winters of wear. Meanwhile my 35 year old real leather boots I inherited from my grandmother are still wearable and repairable today.
When we go out with friends, de facto everyone pays for their own orders and tips accordingly. That way everyone is in complete control over their food, drink and wallets. If we're having a party/bbq/whatever, the host will specify whether it's a potluck, and we're just happy with whatever people bring, whether it's fancy or cheap, homemade or from a store. We don't even pull faces if someone doesn't bring something at all, because the important thing is seeing each other (and there's always too much left at the end anyways).
I don't bring anything to a potluck because often there is too much food and I'm just doing everyone a favor by not obligating someone to take left overs home or just trashing it.
I find the argument against vegan leather frustrating because all of the points brought against it also apply to animal skin: ✔️Poor working conditions (can apply anywhere. Make sure to check on certifications for fair trade working conditions if this is a concern (which it should be). Slaughterhouses, however, are notorious for awful working conditions.) ✔️Bad for the environment (raising cows is incredibly harmful for the environment, and leather is treated with toxic chemicals that are bad for both workers and the environment turning the leather into skin that doesn’t decompose - meaning it doesn’t degrade quickly (probably around 100 years) when tossed away just like pvc (though it will take pvc longer to fully break down)) And then, of course, there’s the added factor that animal leather requires the death of a living being to produce (and yes, most leather (especially high end leather) comes from animals raised specifically for their skin). All this being said, buy secondhand like Chelsea said! Secondhand anything is going to be better for the environment than something new. And support companies that are producing leather goods with new innovative sustainable, and eco-friendly materials like pineapple leather and mushroom leather or maybe even move towards other materials entirely like cork! Thank you for coming to my TED talk 🙏 (And check out the 2017 Pulse of the Fashion Industry Report for some helpful graphs that demonstrate the comparative environmental impact of animal leather and vegan leather. Spoiler: animal leather had a much larger impact.)
Some info about leather: There seems to be this false idea that leather is “natural” while faux leather is fake and plastic. It’s not that straight forward, as both products have to go through a long process before becoming usable. Besides longevity, leather really isn’t that much better than faux leather. Cows are very resource intensive, and leather is treated to not break down, and when it does it releases toxins. Also, *leather does not come from meat cows*, cows are bred for specific purposes, and those that are bred for leather might not have the most desirable meat. I’m sure the meat is sold as a byproduct, maybe inferior meat or pet food, but leather is not by any means a byproduct, it is the product. A part of veganism as a moral stance is stopping viewing animals as a commodities, as buying second hand leather is still purchasing the processed skin of another being. Personally I don’t have a problem with other people buying second hand leather, but they can also buy second hand faux leather, which will reduce the environmental impact of it. Thanks for coming to my ted talk
I've had my second hand leather belt for about 20 years now, and it was already broken in when I bought it. I don't think you can compare the longevity of any faux leather on the market to high quality real leather
@@supernova622 while I agree with you that faux leather is nowhere near the quality of animal leather, I don’t the the issue is the faux is inherently bad. I think we’ve been using leather and hide for thousands of years and really learned to perfect them, faux leather needs to be improved a lot more to get to that level. Plastic is just very cheap and easy to make, which makes it a tempting choice to use for products.
Many companies have overused the vegan leather term to appeal to a certain group of people although it seems not much better for the planet. It would degrade slower than organic materials. Plus, vegan leather is not as attractive to buy second hand. I think vegan "leather" isn't good any way you see it.
@@supernova622 I've had my faux purses, belts, totes, and wallets for decades. They're going strong, and no one died. Add to that the land and resources intensive nature of animal agriculture, and it's an easy choice for me.
@@ignazs.5816 Strenuously disagree. I haven't purchased leather or any animal skins or other products for over 30 years. I have had no problem finding anything I need in sufficient variety and good quality.
I always wonder how many "minimalists" have a basement full of stuff at their parents' house? Also, minimalism assumes that if you declutter something and find you need it later, you can afford to replace it. It's the litter opposite for the depression mentality which our grandparents had for a reason.
I know a few people that profess to being minimalist, but in actuality they are moochers. One of these people lived with his parents all through college and for 2 years after college and saved nearly 100% of his income during that period. Also during that time he was on the his father's health insurance, car insurance and cell phone plan. He truly had no expenses aside from gasoline for his car and auto parts. He drives a 20 year old car that he bought for next to nothing. His father is a mechanical engineer that fixes cars in his spare time, so any car issues would be fixed by his father and he would just borrow one of the families' cars while his car was being repaired - his family has several cars that are constantly rotating in and out of road worthiness. When he did move out of the house he kept his residence as his parents house because he didn't want to pay the local wage taxes in his area. So he is not only a moocher, but he is also a tax evader that professes to be a minimalist.
@@randallflagg1547 why is he considered a mooch for living with his parents during and a little after college? It sounds like he was reasonably living beneath his means during his early adulthood to set a foundation for him to be more financially independent later on. His choice sounds responsible and his parents were gracious enough to allow him to stay. Depending on family circumstances, certainly not everyone is going to have that option. But it doesn’t mean that the people who take it are wrong.
@@hopscotch39 Agreed, I dont think living with parents is “mooching” if theyre ok with it. Its just a better use of resources. But the residence issue is kinda skeevy
Can you do an episode on the disappearance of the FDIC insured 5.25% savings accounts. They disappeared in the 80's with deregulation and the S&L scandal but you could walk into a Savings & Loan, and for as little as $10 open an account with 5.25% annual interest GUARANTEED, federally insured. They destroyed these to force people into the stock market. But imagine having an insured, guaranteed account with that sort of interest rate. Seriously, no one talks about this but it is one of the reasons boomers were able to accumulate so much wealth.
tipping is done around the world... leave the small change on the table for the waiter for good service (a euro, a buck)... diners just aren't required to pay the full paycheck like in the US.
Exactly you just tip the change and it’s fine. If someone goes up and over you kan tip more to show your appreciation, but tipping because the restaurant doesn’t pay their staff is just ridiculous
I can say, as a vegan, vintage/used leather is awesome. High quality product without extra suffering or resources going into it. I don’t own any personally, cause I’m just not the biggest fan of leather, but I would never hate on used leather
Thrift stores are the best...most of the time I find things that are almost new...last time 2 tops, tags still on, one was $65...I paid $12( yay). And you can drop off the things you stopped wearing.
When you really connect with the fact that you're wearing someone's skin, someone, an individual, a person who died in fear and confusion begging for his or her life, then wearing leather feels unnecessary, to say the least.
OMG I adore you! There's no one who cuts to the quick as effectively as you do when blending wealth topics with social justice. Keep up the good work! (A little love from the gay guys portion of your demographic ha ha)
As someone who is reasonably attractive, but also not that pretty, and often not pretty enough, let me tell you subjective is the perfect word for it. My advice is try to keep in mind that there is always someone "prettier" than you, and there is always someone "prettier" than them. Not only does the person who does the hiring/picking/judging have their own standards of what pretty is, if the person in charge resents how attractive you are (or they perceive you to be), it can go the other way too. I'm sure I've been at far opposite ends of the "beauty" spectrum depending on where I am, what I'm doing, and the kind of day I'm having. I can confirm that 'pajamas and flip-flops in Walmart at 2am because you just really needed a specific pint of ice cream' is pretty on nobody, so we have that great equalizer at least. It's all very much in the eye of the beholder. I will never have legs or a butt that will impress anybody probably. I am okay with this now. Figure out what you're most proud of with yourself and cherish that.
I've often thought that there is such a thing as the attractiveness bias, but I also think it's more complicated than just being born pretty. I think it stems in some cases from being poor or being somewhat neglected growing up. Being able to afford shampoo that actually cleans your hair, having parents that have the inclination and money to teach you to brush your teeth and take you to the dentist, that brush your hair, and teach you basic hygiene. These things make a difference to your "attractiveness" in early life, which then impact your mental health and confidence. All that put together can make an "attractive" or "unattractive" adult.
Attractive privelage isn't discussed because there's no objective attractiveness metric and there's really no way to acknowledge your own attractiveness privelage without coming across as incredibly conceited. In fact, many people who are pretty attractive are probably at least somewhat insecure about whether or not they are themselves. Simultaneously, its never really OK to tell someone you acknowledge their lack of attractiveness privelage, no matter who they are. "Body positivity" norms sort of mandate telling everyone that they're "beautiful" or other attractive terms, even if they really aren't to most people. It's impossible to express sincere good intentioned sympathy for someone for being ugly.
By this same token, in the video, she had one line about the downfalls of being too pretty, but that's something that isn't discussed either because the conversation quickly turns to, 'oh wow, yeah, I WISH I had THOSE problems.'
You're right! Things like tailoring, braces, exercise, haircare, and skincare can radically transform a person's appearance in small ways but are not fully accessible unless you have lots of time and money. Certain types of attractiveness can be class signifiers, so this whole thing is way more complicated than Hot Person Bad.
That's a chicken and egg situation though. They likely were already attractive and that that helped them reach their position to make themselves more attractive. You can't buy being 6'4" after all.
The second opinion reminds me of this “theory” that I have, that the only people for whom the law of attraction/manifesting works for are attractive or come from wealth. And they’re the only people who truly believe it works because they don’t want to admit that they haven’t actually earned the things they have.
Wealth and attractiveness and having to earn everything in life otherwise aside, a lot of what people preach for law of attraction and manifesting are simply practices for gratitude and intentionality that are co-opted from yoga and/or meditation classes as well as the major spiritual scriptures, which seems to be the bigger discussion that needs to be addressed. It's much easier to realize your goals if you can learn to hit pause on the endless rumination spirals of self-doubt and/or self-loathing and instead visualize/affirm/write on the belief that somehow there is a way to experience everything that you actually desire and to actually embody the feeling of having already achieved all of that whenever the topic comes to mind. It's about diligently redirecting your focus and awareness in a nonjudgmental fashion away from the problem and more toward a space that contains the solution. This can be applied by all people, regardless of circumstance. Sure, what you need to do to actually move forward in that preferred direction may not be immediately clear, but the idea is to cultivate that trust and Faith that things will work out for you one way or another, and all you need to do in the meantime is to be open to new opportunities as they present themselves in their own time as you continue to lead your life. As long as you don't dwell constantly in despair and don't let the transgressions of the past fester inside of you and don't allow yourself to constantly panic about the uncertainty of the future, this is much easier to do. There are many parallels between this and learning to become more emotionally stable and assertive. As you practice gratitude and visualization, you will get a better sense of what you actually want, what your boundaries are, how to meet your needs, and how to strengthen your self-concept in a way that fuels your desire to take initiative each day and experiment with trial and error. I would go as far as to say that it's another way to shift from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset by changing your core beliefs in a way that is favorable and leads to greater resilience and patience. When done right, you are less affected by the challenges in life and seek new creative ways of working through perceived obstacles or are less concerned about pivoting and trying a novel approach as it will all work itself out. Obsessively trying to manipulate things and people in the physical world is so much more effortful than choosing to drop all of the worries and tension and deciding unwaveringly that what you want is already yours internally. You don't need to go out of your way to force anything, and it will all show up better than you could have imagined. As a side benefit, you will be more pleasant to be around because you will be triggered less and less by old feelings of lack, insecurity, and worthlessness. Yes, it still requires practice and consistency initially to cultivate a new outlook and reach those states of calm inner knowing, but there is far less strain involved.
@@letsdomath1750 But also, when something goes well, you will naturally ascribe a rationale and story for why it did. It’s somewhat of a confirmation bias at work. Those who share their LoA success stories don’t actually know why something went well and, if it happened to match a stated desire, they will credit LoA instead of, say, “I happened to meet someone who worked there while I was at an industry event and she passed along my resume…” Plus, you don’t hear about the unsuccessful stories, of which there surely are plenty. LoA is more or less the theory that if you throw enough darts and are open to where they land, you’ll find that some stick and lead you…somewhere…eventually…
@@emiliabolsas "if you throw enough darts and are open to where they land, you’ll find that some stick and lead you…somewhere…eventually…" Yeah, for sure, that's pretty much it. You are indeed using a form of confirmation bias to train yourself to not dwell on setbacks and failures but to keep your sight steady on what you want. In other words, keep going, continue selecting things that enrich you moment by moment in a conscious and deliberate manner, be grateful for the wins you get along the way, and enjoy your life as it continues to unfold. All the while you remind yourself that what you want is yours, and it is done. If it takes a second or two years, that matters not because you know it's yours and will be able to savor it for a long time. Full stop. True, there are plenty of stories of people who got burned out and didn't see the results they wanted, and I have read plenty of them, but the common denominator is that you must persist, despite all odds. Even if you first experience the complete opposite of your desire, you must still persist with conviction until the storm passes once and for all. Basically, you must steel your resolve and make a vow to yourself that you will not waiver. And yes, I agree that the way in which the big break comes to fruition should be appreciated and acknowledged, but the decision to see things through was one that you made internally first and foremost. Moreover, the way things turn out in my favor may not be applicable to your particular situation at this point in time, so in your hypothetical example, for instance, the specifics of me meeting someone who works at the company and getting them to pass along my resume may not be viable for you if you live in a completely different state or country. As such, knowing the specifics of one person's rags to riches story may serve as inspiration for your own personal journey, but more often than not, copying everything they did may not be the most optimal path for you personally. There may be useful insight to glean as well as tips that can be put into practice (e.g. be open to expanding your professional network), but much of our lives and circumstances are unique to each one of us.
Having weighed 70 lbs more than I do now, I know that there is a beauty privilege. When you are considered overweight and unattractive, many people ignore you and you are not heard. Also on the inverse, if you are a woman and conventionally beautiful, it can also work against you in any of the science, engineering, mechanical, etc. fields. Getting your colleagues to listen and take you seriously can be a challenge.
I always wonder if those types of rich people who nickel and dime with us, nickel and dime with other rich people? Or are they trying to "teach" us something ?
I think they actually flaunt a little bit when they are with other rich people since there is a sort of competition and maybe they might perceive them as able to return that in some sort of favour. However the rest of us mortals are not even part of the competition and they probably think that we would take advantage.
I used to go to yard sales with my best friend every weekend. We avoided wealthy neighborhoods because they would mark absolute garbage $20 while the middle class people would mark better items $2. They just thought even their garbage s was better.
Get into a profession where not too many pretty people go into. Avoid any sales/marketing/finance field or basically any field where dealing with people is the main focus. Luckily pretty people tend to leverage their looks in performance professions like acting or dancing so we uglos are safe from competing with them. 😅
I very much disagree with the take on making conscious decisions. This sounds like just a way for you to justify unethical choices. These business DO care what the customers think. Why do you think there are so many more sustainable brands at places like Target now? That’s taking shelf space from a less ethical company. This is only one example and definitely does not mean that there is no impact or other misconceptions. Sources: I am a Sustainability Consultant for private corporations and have a BS in corporate sustainability
In my economics course we saw its actually the worse thing to do, because the companies only cut these poor peoples jobs more instead of making ethical changes 😔
Do you work for B Corp by chance? I agree with you. I also think it's a balance. It's hard to live in the gray area where you don't always make the more ethical or sustainable choice but sometimes you do. It seems too contradictory to our brains. Sometimes we get decision fatigue. It's easy to sometimes feel like, eff it, I feel like buying cheap, or you need to be, or you don't feel you can carry that burden of choice (assuming you have a choice). Important to remember some really don't have that choice too. I guess what I'm saying is, just because you can't do it 100% doesn't mean you shouldn't try sometimes.
I think the focus of her take was more on the fact that individual choices (even though impactful in their own way) are never going to be as impactful as changes through legislation and at regulatory levels. We shouldn't just be content with saying yeah I buy this cruelty-free brand and leave it at that, but if we care, we should actually try to work in whatever way we can to influence decision- and policy-makers to punish more heavily harmful practices and incentivize sustainable ones, this way, large-scale, more impactful changes can happen. On another note, making conscious decisions only means that you are aware that no one can live a 100% sustainable life as a consumer so you shouldn't beat yourself up about it. You can do your part as much as your personal circumstances allow you to and it shouldn't be a huge burden if you don't fit somebody else's idea of a sustainable life. Your standards are not necessarily somebody else's standards so as long as you can live your life in a way that reflects your personal values, then that's ok. We have made, make, and will continue to make unethical choices in one aspect of life or another, whether we're aware of it or not, but that doesn't mean that we're not trying to do better, or that we're terrible human beings, it just means that life is a complicated mess so the best we can do is to make conscious decisions about our lives.
@@calibby85 I do actually work for a B-Corp! Good guess! I just got lucky though, there are many positions like mine in traditional companies who are trying to improve. I 100% agree with your take. It’s hard to be perfect, try just being better. This is also relevant in the veganism for sustainability space.
I had a friend in junior high who lended me $1 one day when I was short for lunch. I had every intention of paying her back, but I forgot about it the next morning, and I will never forget how I felt when she came straight up to me first thing, hand extended, "my dollar???". She was an only child who had everything and anything she wanted it was not a case of the $1 going to make or break her life. Almost 15 years later and I still get a sick feeling in my stomach and vowed that day to NEVER make any friend feel the way she made me feel. TBH it has come at my detriment sometimes when friends don't pay me back, or take over a year to pay me back their share on a hotel (long story, and did have to confront this friend but it took me over 2 months to do it) but I'm sticking with my code. Also over the years how friends treat you in regards to money has been a good indicator of how much or if they value you and your friendship.
Giiirrll!!! Thanks for talking about pretty privilege!! I went on a weekend getaway with husband to a small mountain town and I mention to him how you could figure out who is rich by how pretty they are and is kinda ridiculous. Perfect teeth, skin, make up, cute clothing, etc
I think many middle class families do have the "inheritance to grandchildren " thing. My grandmother's stuff went to her children (we were all under 10), but most of her money went into bonds for us. And I have heard similar stories elsewhere.
I didn't receive anything from my grandmother when she died, nor was I expecting anything. One of my uncles had already bleed my grandmother dry while she was still alive; in order to fund his various businesses. He believed that everyone else in the family, including my grandmother would just squander my grandmother's money. The poor woman lived a very frugal lifestyle, many due to surviving the great depression and losing her husband in the early 70s to cancer that was likely caused by asbestos exposure from working in the steel industry in the 50s and 60s.
Ma'am, you have not met my aunt. She was serving burgers at a family thing, where we all brought items, but being herself, there was no cheese, no ketchup or pickles. Because everyone has to have cheese on the burger, or hot dog, I went to my mom's refrigerator a few houses away, and, from my own purchases, procured the required cheese. I also took a jar of pickles and, the good, expensive barbecue sauce. My aunt was then heard charging my mom 75 cents, for my slice of cheese. I even presented a receipt, from my pocket, but she still wanted everyone to pay her for the cheese.
Yeah, one of my best friends had a circle of friends who were basically trust fund babies. They were the WORST. We were making squat just out of college... most of them had a) rich parents paying their bills b) and/or high dollar jobs. They would STILL run up huge charges at a bar or restaurant... then want to 'split' the bill. Uh, that's a no for me!
I've been vegan for 8 years now. I have so many thoughts on this. I wholeheartedly disagree with the idea that "one person can't make a difference." Maybe not on a grand scale, but if there are enough people who are able to influence enough people, it can grow into something real that can make real change by "voting with one's wallet." And while I agree that regarding Old Navy, in the example you brought up, it's not possible for many people, veganism actually is very possible for many people. I've watched so many videos of people trying these "living on $x a day" challenges, and the first thing they give up is meat. I am vegan and will need my food budget to be about $6 a day, which is not crazy frugal, but isn't the vegan-specific products like Beyond Burgers and shopping at Whole Foods. You also mentioned that 'clean eating' is a personal choice, and I'd agree with you, but it's not just a personal choice when it affects others' lives. Trust me, I don't follow 'clean eating' but veganism is more than just a personal choice, since there are often-ignored victims involved when not being vegan. As for vegan leather, compared to secondhand leather, I'd prefer the secondhand leather. I don't think we should be purchasing new cow's leather, though. Even if it's from cows who were slaughtered for their meat, purchasing new leather leads to more of an incentive to continue to farm these animals. Lastly, for human rights, of course that's an equally-important consideration in making purchasing decisions beyond animal ethics. But I find that when many people bring up human rights as an "attack" against veganism (not that you were doing that, Chelsea, you're great), it's very hypocritical, since I find most people who use this argument are not being particularly conscious about human rights in their purchasing decisions themselves, so between a vegan product with slave labor or a non-vegan product with slave labor, while neither is the best, the vegan one is probably ethically better. Besides, the working conditions for the people in the animal agriculture industry is often horrendous, so the ethics of veganism is not limited to animals. /endrant
100% agree with this - I really like Financial Diet but I think Chelsea missed the mark on this one. Maybe because she's not vegan and the topic makes her uncomfortable.
Agreed! And the making/tanning of leather is obv bad for the animals, but it's very toxic for the humans who do it - animals aren't the only ones hurt in its production
@@Driveontheroad Yeah, when she said she wasn't going to open the can of worms about veganism, I could tell the idea made her uncomfortable, and wondered if she feels like she should be vegan if she actually thinks about it, but decides not to. Maybe that's not the case, and it's entirely speculation, but it's something I thought about.
Situation 1 (sort of on a tangent, but about having even relationships with your friends) also applies to couples/ relationships. Not putting all the financial pressure on one person to support both, example always having one person paying for everything, goes a long way. This is especially the case when you aren't merging your finances. Having a "I pay this time and you pay next time" mindset just elevates so much stress on peoples budgets cause they aren't now paying for two people but also should you break up, there wont be a feeling of owing the other person/having shelled out for the other person. Anything that eliminates unnecessary stress is a good thing
Def don't agree with the book one lol, I'm not an overly huge reader, maybe 10-15 books in a year, but for the few books I've read before the movie, the books are much better, it's just not possible to have all the detail, insight, descriptions from the book which paint an entire world reflected on screen. There are some really great movie adaptations where the movie is better, but its not the majority. But also yes, people shouldn't be shamed for not reading, and readers shouldn't be pretentious about what/how much they read.
I agree with your statement, the book is generally better than the movie. I am a fan of Stephen King and aside from IT, which I found to be a boring read, his books are better than the movies/TV shows. Side note, I refuse to watch The Dark Tower because I believe that it is impossible to condense over 4500 pages into a 3 hour movie.
this could also be due to the fact that for a lot of books, you form your own emotional attachments because you spend so much time in the character's head and world. Very few books can be read in under 2 hours. But yeah, preferring one over the other doesn't make anyone better or smarter. it's just a personal preference for how you prefer to spend your time/attention!
So many great point in this, but especially the issue of attractive privilege. So glad you spoke about this. Around 10 years ago I had a bit of surgery to fix a problem, a deformity, that was medically somewhat minor but in appearance was hugely damaging in how people perceived me and treated me. People had raging bad takes about my abilities, personality, even my interests. People who've only known me since that surgery have never made those assumptions and are confused by stories of this treatment from my past. Difference in how people perceive me is night & day. I only wish I could've had that surgery sooner!
@@Monicalala I might, depending on why you're asking. Why does it matter in the context of this video and my comment? I have had a lifetime of explaining my condition, so I am also simply not interested in explaining it or giving details of what I had fixed 9thank you for asking instead of demanding an explanation:) ). I think it suffices to say I had a deformity in my right eye fixed. I had a surgery in childhood to fix the worst of it, and as technology progressed I was able to get it fixed a bit more/better in my 30's.
@@liliax9147 Those are part of it, for sure. They're all inter-connected. Men don't need to be pretty the way women do to succeed, so yes it is sexist, but it is still connected to privileging pretty women over "ugly' ones. It was sexism particular to the negativity about my appearance specifically, not by virtue of my femininity alone. I was literally called "ugly" to my face throughout my life, and now people tell me I'm pretty & treat me better. That's why it is pretty privilege.
@@TerriMRoberts For me, being pretty has had negatives. When I was poorer being abused and solicited because I drew a lot of attention. Relationships turning out to be fake and based on my looks. Not being taken seriously when I entered tech and accused of nasty things and sexually harassed. I'm not saying that pretty girls have it worse, I think they are equally shitty sides of the same exact oppression. And to me, privilege implies that there's an element of oppression. In this case it would have to be pretty girls oppressing ugly girls, and that just makes no sense because men are the ones who created the ideal and enforce the consequences. Plus being prettier doesn't actually net you significant power. There are plenty of gorgeous poor girls. Class plays a part in that the more money you have the better clothes, treatments, surgeries etc you can afford to make yourself prettier. That and racism -- white women are more likely to be considered pretty and white women just happen to have white privilege which makes them more likely to be better off.
Just recently I read in a credible source (Niko Rittenau) that 40% of the leather produced is not a byproduct of the meat industry but it comes from cows that are being raised just for this purpose. Even in India where cows musn't be killed because they are considered to be holy, people drag the animals over the country border and kill them there because the leather business is so lucrative. Raising cows for leather therefore is just as much a waste of resources as it is to raise them for meat. In addition, we have to consider the ethical motives of being vegan and most vegans wouldn't buy vintage leather either because it goes against their values. I agree though that this could be a more sustainable option than buying new leather products. On the other hand, real leather is also a highly processed product which doesn't just decompose if you throw it away. Some vegan labels are experimenting with alternative natural materials such as pineapple leather or cork. Let's see where all this is going :)
Isn’t it better to split every time? I am a student I am much more comfortable with spending 10€ every month to go out than with paying 50€ in one month and then nothing the next.
Yes to all of this, especially your take on minimalism Vs just being poor. All I would add is that whilst it makes little difference to boycott Amazon or whoever, it can make a big difference to choose to support small businesses instead, so if conscious consumerism is viewed from that perspective instead I think it's probably more impactful? But still capitalism, so whatever.
Re: buying consciously takes effort away from activism. I completely disagree. I know soo soo sooooo many people who only got into activism due to an urge to start buying consciously. They go hand in hand with change. Companies will see the trends change to conscious consumerism and will follow that inherently. Activism and conscious consumption complement each other, not detract.
Exactly, the self-actualisation of your own morality and engagement with what you purchase and the industries that are associated, goes hand in hand as you eloquently stated.
@@ONeill01 thank you! I also find it a bit hypocritical for people to be activists but support bad industries or companies in ways they could totally control. I live by the mantra of being the change you want to see. Just because someone without the same income as me can only afford H&M doesn't mean I have to shop there too.
I also think that it’s too easy to push «poor people» in front of us and make it about elitism. If you have the money to pay for your new clothes, you should. If not someone in a third world-country will. By supporting companies that pay living wages, give sick-leave and maternal leave etc. you wont change the whole industry right away, but for those workers it means everything. If you can’t afford it, that’s fine, but if you cCAN, don’t go «but what about poor people».
I think one of the challenges of addressing pretty privilege is what is there that can be done about it? We know it exists but now what? Humans are attracted to pretty thing, in evolutionary terms: pretty = better/ healthier/ stronger. This obviously does not translate into abilities that are needed in our modern world, but the biological preference remains. But it is also very subjective, unlike other attributes like gender or race that can result in some sort of privilege but that can also be used to create guidelines to prevent unfair discrimination in the workplace. Like gender bias, pretty bias can be unlearned in individuals but how can guidelines based on something so subjective be enforced by employers? "You gave James a promotion because he's hot!" can be combated with "Not to me.". Furthermore there are the benefits to companies that have attractive people working in the front end with clients or customers. These attractive people result in increased profits and better deals, just because people trust them more. This is not an advantage companies will give up, and for some it is a big part of brand identity. It sucks that some people wont even be considered for a position if they are conventual unattractive, but what can we do? It's just such a difficult conversation.
I think it’s more about the false messages about us living under a meritocracy when there are many other factors that can determine people’s success other than hard work, knowledge and experience. One of the main ones being class but many other factors contribute but still society tells you it’s merit when it usually isn’t really.
You don’t do anything about it because pretty privilege is not a real, separate privilege. It is bits and pieces of sexism, classism, racism, and ableism.
Unpopular opinion: People need to stop commenting on Veganism as if it's only an environmental decision for people? A big part of Veganism, from an animal rights perspective, is avoiding the exploitation of animals. In that case, buying the second hand leather 'because the animal is already dead' may still be against their values. Agree with the consensus on cheap plastic leather, but I'm really tired of the animal rights perspective being ignored in these discussions.
Agreed. This would allow the debate to branch out to questions of animal rights vs human rights and what "cruelty free" ought to be, which is a whole other can of worms but still falls squarely under the umbrella of ✨harmful consequences of capitalism✨
Reminds me of that crap video that recently came out “is it wrong to be vegan”. Most vegans are for the animals, and wanting to help the environment is a part of helping the animals on this earth...
I was baffled by Chelsea's admonition to buy leather. "The cow is already dead! You're honoring him!" If people didn't want to wear or buy shoes made from dog skin she'd not be so casual. When Ed Gein made belts from the nipples of his victims, was that "honoring" those women?
I almost gave up completely on this channel a while back when she proudly proclaimed her furs were real in the middle of an otherwise overly politically correct rant. I think it's safe to assume animal rights are nowhere on her radar.
@@vegronica9006 (oversimplified) Serial killers kill for fun and flaunt their trophies bc they're mentally ill. Humans have been eating animals and utilizing their hide since hunter and gatherer days as a means to survive while minimizing wasting resources. We no longer NEED to use animal hide in our products, but unfortunately society has a plethora of problems that we're in the mide of hopefully changing for the best.
The vegan leather thing: I personally wouldn’t buy it but the confusion comes from confusing veganism with environmentalism/ethical consumption. It’s just about not using/purchasing animal products - that’s it and everything else is down to personal choice, and so it’s perfectly possible that the vegan choice may not be the most ethical or sustainable choice.
Leather is definately less sustainable for the planet than the least sustainable vegan alternative. A lot of leather is not a byproduct there are many dedicated leather farms for instance a large handbag, a leather jacket or knee high leather boots. Anything that uses larger pieces of leather. When an animal is dying for someones preference, it is not a personal choice because there is a victim. A sentient being suffered a terrible death and a likely terrible life for that leather. If someone chooses to buy new leather, they are choosing to pay for an animal to be terribly abused and killed.
@@creatureofhabit5129 as a vegan myself, I do not agree that a newly produced piece of plastic is more sustainable than a second hand leather item that has already been produced. Please read what I said about “personal choice” again because I think you misunderstood - I’m saying that is the personal choice of each vegan as to whether or not they also care about their environmental impact outside of the consumption of animal products, usually it is the case but hypothetically a personal could live an extremely unsustainable lifestyle but still be vegan because they don’t consume animal products (e.g Kim k)
@@robyn6454 I see what you are saying but your original comment did not specify second hand and so in the instance of new leather, my points still stand. There are many people who won't buy second hand at all unfortunately like, as you say Kim K and indeed many of her fans. I would love to see vegan leather options in shops, for the likes of those people, much like it's good to have vegan options at KFC. And eventually, the vegan leather will make it's way to the second hand shops anyway.
@@creatureofhabit5129 I said that vegan is not always the most sustainable choice... meaning there are more sustainable options ... such as buying second hand. I’m not saying either way whether or not vegan leather is a good thing personally I don’t like the look of leather at all I was simply answering Chelsea’s question about why a vegan person might prefer plastic despite its environmental impact
Thank you SO MUCH for talking about the "pretty privilege." My husband is significantly older than me (a boomer, I'm a Gen-Xer) and he is drop dead gorgeous. He is a white male. He came from a certain amount of middle/upper middle-income and was able to attend college in that time where it wasn't so painfully and destructively expensive. He attended UVA out of state and got gentlemen's C's with a degree in history, spending time in the theater department. After college he sort of fell in to doing pensions, even though his math skills were atrocious (and math was important to be an actuarial back then). Then spent time in various higher end sales positions. I have always told him "oh, to be a good looking white male. You did just fine coasting through on looks and lazy. I'd be homeless."
I feel pretty privilege is a thing that favors men mostly but crippling to women in the job market (and not much better in the dating field). I stand by that. You see lots of good looking men skirt by through life but attractive women don’t get as many benefits as it seems. Getting attention isn’t always a good thing and it’s usually not in the case of women. Attractive women usually just get multiple loads of jealousy vibes, backstabbing and stalking from both genders. I saw my mom go through it and it genuinely frightened the heck out of me. Especially when her colleague tried to force her to go out with hem even though she explicitly told him she was married.
Hei, great video! However the vegan leather issue is more complex. Vegan leather is more often than not not a by product. That means that animals have to be brought up, and slaughtered. This involves that there is a big amount of suffering and CO2 emissions evolved (much more than plastic). Vegan leather is not always plastic,it can be organic. And as most vegan products the quality is increasing rapidly :) Most times its higher quality than leather and virtually undestinguishable.
I think people also really underestimate how polluting and toxic leather production and dyeing is. And it's definitely not more sustainable if you're buying a new hot pink or metallic bag every season.
It's not about being "up in our asses", it's merely about preferences. I am an avid reader, and a movie lover, and there is no movie that is better than the book, because they are simply different media and should not be compared. No movie can ever adapt the book to the fullest, but that is not a bad thing, it's just a different medium with different characteristics and abilities.
You can absolutely be poor and not a minimalist. Chelsea needs to watch hoarders. People can grab things off the side of the road or not throw out expired/damaged goods to the point it all accumulates. It's actually super common for people that grew up in low income homes to become hoarders...
I'll be honnest - I forget which video was the first that was recommended to me by the algorithm, but my first thought really was ''Great, another woman in a fancy living room is going to make me feel bad and tell me Starbucks coffee is the reason why I'm poor'' and I was sooo pleasantly surprised. The content is very diverse, so open and so refreshing. Love it!
I've moved to buying mostly secondhand, with some new purchases when I can't find exactly what I want secondhand. Almost every dress I own was purchased secondhand, every designer item was at a massive discount (like 90%) bc of some thread being loose that I stitched back up etc. I'm definitely not a minimalist, either - it's about deciding where you want your money to go and where you can spend less/have less impact if you're in the privileged group that can make those choices. We've just got to do the best with what we have... And hold the uber wealthy and corporations accountable for the absolute WASTE they throw onto this earth with impunity.
Choosing Everlane vs H&M may not make a huge ecological or ethical difference. But buying used clothing and furniture, and buying less clothing and furniture, does (as does eating less meat and dairy - particularly less red meat and less cheese). Until we have broader regulations, individuals need to step up and make responsible choices - and the great thing is that ecologically responsible choices are also usually very financially responsible as well.
Yeah, my peak attractiveness was best described as unobtrusively pretty. Unless I was hardcore your type it took a good conversation or two for me to register. It served me well in life.
I’ve been vegan for years. Personally I just don’t buy leather or vegan leather. It makes me uncomfortable to wear real leather... same reason I wouldn’t eat lab-grown meat even if it was ethical. Gross lol. I’ve bought some vegan leather second-hand, but I try to stick to second-hand cotton and hemp when I can
Looks are absolutely related to class and affluence - dental work, cosmetics, clothing, hair care, less stress, etc. So many elements that we associate with being attractive are bought.
HARD disagree about the movie being better than the book thing. I could probably write a book on the subject, but I will just leave it at how much nuance is lost when you aren't able to read (know) the character's thoughts and you can only see their actions, and how leaving out/blending characters and not mentioning motivations for things always makes the story harder to understand but is a very common practice when making adaptations.
It depends on the book and film in question. There are some books that just really do lose something when adapted to film, like what you're talking about. But there are others where the movie may not be the SAME experience as the book, but it's not at all a worse one. And then there are a few film adaptations that I think are actually better than the book. My primary example of this is The Hunger Games. I enjoyed the book, but while reading it, I did have the thought that it read more like an action movie screenplay than the average novel, and when I saw the movie, I did think that it not only translated very well to screen but also that the additions they made actually enhanced the story. It really does just kind of depend on the story in question.
You are right but there are exceptions. Such as Who’s afraid of Virginia Wolf, Suddendly last summer, the Godfather (and Nino Rota’s music), some Stephen King’s adaptions Carrie, Misery, and the Shining, talking about Jack Nicholson Flight over a Cukoo’s Nest, some Ira Levin’s the Stepford Wives, Sliver, Rosemary’s Baby, also by Roman Polansky Tess d’Uberville written by Thomas Hardy, Robert Harris’s Silence of the Lambs, Isaak Dinensen Out of Africa, Babette’s Feast, Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, WM Thackerey’s Vanity Fair and countless others French, Italian and Japanese you may not be familiar with. I think movie adaptions are good/amazing when the cast & director are good/amazing.
Thinks about my bestie leaving a $20 tip on a $25 bill the other night when we went out for drinks. She grew up with nothing and worked hard to have nice things and money to enjoy. She spreads the love and I love her
thats just wasteful imo.
How is it wasteful? You are spreading wealth to a working class American who lives on tips 🤷🏼♀️ Isn’t that how the GOP’s beloved “trickle down economics” works?
@@asadb1990 you probably don’t tip and also probably should eat in restaurants
@@allana1997 i do tip but not the 10-15%. lol. i tip $0.5-1. and for that i expect tiptop service.
As a server, she would make my day and I'll definitely would pamper the hell out of her table.
Re: the minimalism discussion, I think it's also important to note that in order to be minimalist, you have to have enough disposable income to be able to replace things quickly. Think about it: if you only own one winter jacket (as an example) and that jacket is significantly damaged or lost, it's no biggie if you have the money to go and get a new one right away. But if you can't drop money on a new jacket right now and that was your only one? You're kind of screwed.
This is why some lower income people keep literally everything, even stuff that isn't being used and hasn't been for years: you never know when you'll need that thing again.
Probably to an extent it's true. I mean keeping something because it's broken and you aren't the kind of person who will ever fix it, isn't benefitting even someone who can't afford to replace it.
This is why I will own a bunch of king size sheets and sneakers however. I don't want to pay close to $100
for even moderately decent sheets, so on the rare occasions where there are good quality sheets at the thrift in patterns I like, I will buy them. And because I don't want to buy the $130 sneakers I like whenever mine wear out, if I see ones that fit for under $10 at the thrift, I'm going to buy them. And I wear my sneakers until they are literally falling apart. I also decided to keep my second older car even after getting a "new" old car since insurance and registration are so cheap and if one needs a big repair, it's not urgent.
@@TheeBamse Well….I think if you buy a smoothie everyday it would actually benefit you to buy the blender, yeah? Because you would be making use of it everyday. It’s a part of your life and routine. But it’s a waste of money to buy a smoothie and produce trash when it’s not necessary. Minimalism allows you to have things, just not things in excess and abundance. I think that blender would be a wonderful addition.
This is it. I love it as an aesthetic so I guess it describes me but I'm privileged enough to be able to afford good quality furniture, kitchenware etc that lasts for years and I don't keep having to replace. If I needed a new sofa tomorrow I could buy one. That doesn't make me smarter or better it just makes me privileged.
@@LoveAndSnapple I think the point they’re trying to make is that if you have the money, you can just buy a smoothie and not have to own a blender in order to be more minimalist. It’s more practical, and cheaper, to just own the blender, but if you have it out on your counter it can mess with the * a e s t h e t i c * of minimalism, especially if it’s an older one you had to buy second hand.
Basically, the point is that minimalism can actually be quite expensive depending on how it’s approached. Approached well it can cost less and have less environmental impact, but approached poorly it emphasizes looks over practicality, costing more in the long run (both in dollars and environmental impact).
My grandma always told me this
"We don't code poor people's purchases as 'minimalism.' We code them as poor." I love the focus on purchases based on the intentionality.
Agreed...a lot of the time, minimalism seems to be more about the aesthetic rather than focusing on living with less (which is fine if that's what someone is into, but I think intentionality is really important)
@@anuparekh7350 i mean it depends on perspective minimalism was originaly a aesthetic
@@entretenimiento3347 True, which means it can be costly just like any aesthetic and doesn't necessarily go hand in hand with saving money
I considered myself a minimalist when I was poor, but I think I’ve always questioned. “Am I a minimalist or am I just poor?” It definitely forces one to become extremely selective in what we choose to spend money on. Adopting a wardrobe of only a few colors was necessary for me since I only owned like ten pieces of clothing. I worked hard on refining my values and spent money on things like books or novel experiences and less on things.
In a way, I really cherish that feeling. Of course I’m in a better place now financially in the middle class, but it is easier to over purchase when there is less of a financial consequence involved, leading to guilt and shame, even anxiety. I find that it’s happened much more frequently than I thought it would, especially after years of discipline and deep work on my values. I’ve adopted a broader view of what owning things means to me, and a lot of grace with myself.
@@authenticallytrish Did you find calling yourself a minimalist when you didn’t have money to be a positive thing? When I was on a strict budget and shopping with friends, I found it easier to say I didn’t want to buy things because I’m being intentional than saying I was broke. I think it’s one way for poor people to take control of their day to day financial decisions without letting everyone know they’re in a bad financial situation. Isn’t that a good thing?
Wait, people expect you to pay them for groceries after they host one party?? Hospitality has left the chat.
Yeah when I heard that I was like????? Excuse me?????? The audacity
I know, right? They could only get away with that once. Then it's "Oh, you're having a cook out? How nice. No, I can't make it. i can't afford you this week."
Ummm… but hosting parties is a skill. As a software engineer without that skill, if someone is doing the admin labor of organizing an event, I desperately want to be able to recognize that.
If you agree on that PRIOR I would put it down as personal taste, but requesting it AFTER is just bad manners.
@@armorsmith43 I also work in STEM, and a lot of my friends operate that way. It's a shame to hear them called rude when being detail oriented is such a valuable trait in other situations.
I think it's a great point that a reason we're not having conversations about "pretty privilege" is because it would be hard to figure out who should take on that issue. If a person who is not conventionally attractive raises the topic, people may say they're using their looks as an excuse for why they're not successful (especially because an unattractive person would be less likely to garner sympathy). If an attractive person leads the conversation, people may not take the issue seriously or believe this is a "thing" (especially if people just see it as an attractive person bragging). Also, it should be noted that conventional "attractiveness" can be intertwined with racism, colorism and classism.
I mean, that happens with every sort of discussion about privilege. There's the Russell Brand quote “When I was poor and complained about inequality they said I was bitter; now that I'm rich and I complain about inequality they say I'm a hypocrite. I'm beginning to think they just don't want to talk about inequality.”
Moreover, it's not as "easy" a thing to overcome. People most of the time have no control over being attractive or average or unattractive, these things, besides being subjective, are (for the most part) out of our control, so it's not like we can say to someone stop being pretty/ugly or that we can effectively not do a double take when a model is trying to sell us a perfume. And not to mention that even though attractiveness has some common traits everywhere and for everyone, beauty standards change with time and among different cultures, so pretty can look very different in other places making it difficult to actually clock pretty privilege when it happens.
Of course it could be controlled in some settings but i believe that it will never be fully eradicated because our brains are wired in a way that more or less makes us instinctively want to pay more attention to and trust more and want to be around pretty people.
@@mybittersweetme I was thinking along those lines too. Plus there's no laws against discriminating against ugly people
I have a good friend who's White & from a Hollywood movie family and who has a disability that shows physically. I'm "conventionally" attractive but originally from the hood. We're in the same profession and have had this looks conversation several times. We're both very privileged in different ways but I think we're professional peers because they're undermined by ableism. And my conventional attractiveness has not eviscerated the reality of my race, gender, and the zip code I was born in.
Granted we're still both very successful but we both had to overcome & still face real barriers based on constructs.
I guess my point is that it is funny how privilege plays out sometimes
@@Meloncov Wow and I thought people didn't care cause it was an ugly specking maybe we need to send in an all around average person to speck up about it.
The pretty privilege conversation is so interesting. IMO for women, there's like an ideal hotness level in any industry, where if you're less attractive, you're ignored, and if you're more attractive, you're not taken seriously.
Also can we get a "salt life" sticker in the style of TFD?
this is very true.
this ^^ And in context. You can be that perfect in-between in some circles/situations and bleed into the less or more attractive than the ideal in others.
Yes this - it’s tricky in the Bay Area especially - you have to like blend in but still be hot lol- I think here it’s like clear skin (but not heavy makeup)😅, nice clothes but unbranded (unless it’s Patagonia of course), and a good haircut are like musts in the work world
But I’m still figuring it out lol
As an “old person” I would say do both. Give money to your kids if you can and your grandkids as well. And give it to them while you are alive. You get to enjoy their progress, education or whatever helps them.
Plus if you give it away while you're alive you don't have to pay that estate tax. Which, I am NOT against estate tax and 100% agree with Chelsea that it's too low, but let's be honest--if you are wealthy enough that your money would be estate taxed, you're probably wealthy enough to get around those taxes anyways....
@@kate-ne Depending on how much is given, somebody still might be liable for some sort of taxes. I don't know all the details, but if grandma is writing 10k checks regularly to Little Timmy, than somebody is probable gonna get taxed.
@@SandyVanV Nope. You can give 15k per year w/o being hit w/ gift tax and up to 11.58 million in a lifetime.
Culturally we take care of our kids. We are a family . That doesn't change because they turn 18 which is a highly arbitrary age
Good now watch them put it. Up thier nose. Lol!
I read a study once that stated teachers even in elementary school show preference to the kids that are more attractive. Pretty privilege starts as soon as you step out of your home into the real world. It's a truly unfair situation. This probably also makes it harder for pretty people to realize the benefit they are receiving because it starts when they are so young.
I've been told that I was pretty my entire life and I had several teachers treat me like absolute shit growing up lol. I knew I was a favorite of some people growing up but the absolute dichotomy in treatment as a child was demoralizing. Having a 'weird' personality seems to overshadow the pretty in some instances. I still have low self esteem, and I question every interaction I have to this day 🤷
It is hard to see if I have gotten special treatment most of the time simply because it's not possible to witness every interaction or judge motivations. I have noticed it happen but more often than not I hear about or am told of the difference in interactions later on.
I've read that even parents will treat their most attractive children better... You don't even need to step out of your home for it to effect you
@@anaerobic Same, I'd like to see this study and how it was conducted. I had some teachers that were cool with me and some teachers that treated me like absolute crap 🤷🏻♀️
@@ilahmache well a crap personality will supercede prettiness after awhile. A teacher who is tired of dealing with an annoying kid's BS will probably cease to treat them better based on looks.
I recently had the conversation in another videos comment section of how being conventionally attractive greatly affects perceptions of poor people. As long as a person is seen as “attractive” troubled pasts are just that - a bit of character. But if you are poor and Look Poor (my favorite example is dental beauty standards) that same level of compassion, interest and favorability is not extended to you
You should check out Tiffany Ferg's new video on teeth!
Yeah I know it's screwed up but if you look like Halle Berry and have missing and decayed teeth, good luck to you.
On vegan leather: I do get your point about "using more out of less suffering", but unfortunately leather now comes from far more sources than just meat or dairy cattle. There's also a huge amount of cattle bred exclusively for their skins, and the most "luxurious" soft leather generally comes from calves or even unborn calves! And while cows provide the bulk of sold leather, many other animals supplement this, from other common farmed animals, to exotic animals, to kangaroos.
So for someone not wanting to harm animals it doesn't make sense to buy it, but even for people who consume animal products, it's worth looking at your choice to buy leather - unfortunately there is even less labelling and sourcing available regarding where your leather came from - do you know if it came from a meat farm in your own country, or was flown from a meat farm on the other side of the world, or from leather cattle, or even cattle at all?
It's also not free of a human cost! Leather production in many countries is an extremely toxic process, tanning leather produces a whole lot of waste that harms the environment, *plus* the workers are exposed to these toxic chemicals and fumes with little to no protection. It's interesting to read about if you care to do so. Now obviously the leather industry isn't the only offender here, the textile industry as a whole has SO MUCH to answer for in terms of safe working conditions and fair pay. But I definitely don't think leather is the way to go if you want to make a kind or sustainable choice.
And there's more than just plastic substitutes for leather out there - I know plastic production is not great or sustainable either. But there are high quality plant leather goods available more and more these days.
Thank you! This is very well put.
Amen!
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think she was talking about vintage/used leather products when she said this? Like, an animal was already killed to make this item, getting a second use out of it is better than buying something new, whether it's vegan leather or actual leather?
Well said!
Thanks for sharing. I simply googled Vegan Leather and everything From PETA to Harper's Bazaar had a definition and controversy about polymer substitute leather to the Vogue Business which mentions the cost affordability of low cost PVC leather. Honestly, at this point I would ask Ed Begley, Jr. and still end up with the same answer.
I would lose my MIND if someone invited me over then charged me!! Like even in college when we were all broke we'd do potluck parties or just figure if I was hosting this time someone else would host the next time and it'd all even out, I can't imagine charging omg
Right?! It's one thing if it's agreed upon before, but AFTER????? I am never inviting them anywhere, and I am certainly not accepting an invitation from them! I didn't budget as if an invitation to a friends house would cost me x amount because they wanted to splurge on a fancy meal for their GUEST! Needless to say, this has happened, and I was extremely offended. They also charged alcohol I didn't drink because "I know you didn't drink it, but I kinda spent a lot on this for *us* " I paid and left, but I did not forgive or forget. I had no say in what was being planned, so I should not have to pay as the person who was invited.
Right? If you want to plan a party but have everyone pay their share, you need to establish that ahead of time so they have the option to opt out, not spring it on them AFTER the party is over. That's a completely bonkers-level of rude.
I feel an extreme amount of second hand embarrassment for everyone involved in this scenario. If my friends did this to me I would pay then promptly block them on everything
I am the type of person who would tell these people no if they asked me to give me money for groceries after being invited to their home. They would probably stop being my friend but it would probably be for the best.
God I HATE this! I've found it also depends on location. I'm from the midwest where it's just give and take (oh, I've got this one, you get next time) and a very guest oriented culture. I moved to the East Coast and made some friends and I've felt like accepting anything comes with a hidden fee (oh I got bagels... that'll be $3 for the bagel and cream cheese, oh can you give me a couple dollars for drinking a couple cokes out of my 12 pack) and it's exhausted! Oh, and god the bartering of multiple items! "Oh I such for the apartment which cost $12 and you got blank for the apartment which cost $10 so why don't you give me $1 and call it even?" Honestly, I'd rather just split everything 50/50 than balance the books like that.
I do think the "you're not ugly, you're just poor" meme best encapsulates this. Very few ppl are true "knockouts" and those that are, are clearly in modeling/acting/influencer where they can best capitalize on that and spend alot of time and money to best preserve their looks. Most "average" ppl are required to invest alot of time and money to get the hair, makeup, food, exercise, cosmetic procedures and clothes in order to increase their "attractiveness". That said, some will have to spend alot more money and time depending on race/genetics/health/etc but it does play a bigger part in our society than most ppl are willing to admit. A good portion of our consumer economy is comprised on capitalizing on our insecurity when it comes to "attractiveness".
$10,000 nose job, $7000 invisalign braces, $3,000 laser hair removal. Let alone $3,000 on clothes every year, $3,000 makeup, $6000 yearly hair if I were living in my fantasy life. “beauty” is expensive
Yess! Thank you for saying that! I was interning with a firm right after my bachelors, moved to the capital city, from my third tier town, and goodness that was such a reality check. At a super high end event, the bosses kind of didn't acknowledge I as a part of the team, another intern was acknowledged. We were asked to dress casual because we'd have to run around. My understanding of casual was casual, sneakers, pair of denims and a sweater. She turned up wearing a blazer, denims and boots. Cut to the next event where I did flash appropriate brands and 'invested' in looking better, the treatment immediately changed.
All content creators know that having your pet in the shot increases engagement with video. I love Mona she is a gem. Also thank you for your reasoned non-cliche views!!
Now I understand, I'm getting so annoyed with the pet thing on TH-cam, every video it's 5 minutes of a cat or dog looking absolutely annoyed because they have to stand there to increase views, I just want to go straight to the point of the video, glad that i can fast-forward.
@@afrikan_criola1923 perhaps the way forward is only to watch content creators who have no pets if its so annoying
As a vegan, I completely agree about buying vintage or used leather over new real or synthetic leather. Less demand for new materials is the way to go!
At one point I had 5 fur coats! All of them in great condition purchased at vintage/thrift shops when I lived in Paris. Now I'm very opposed to wearing real fur (all the coats were sold or donated when I moved to the south of France, along with most of my furniture, books and other items no longer needed) but I never felt guilty about wearing them since these purchases never directly supported the fur industry or taking the lives of more animals.
Or you can just not buy any of it...its only expensive if you buy it and you don't need leather or fur coat, you want it. Veganism or minimalism is only expensive if you live according to your wants and not your needs. You can wear a regular jacket and live a very good life, promise.
I disagree. It is not as bad as directly paying for animal abuse and killing, but it still increases the demand for it. If you buy it, then the person who wants to buy leather but checks the vintage store first will buy a new one because you already have the vintage one.
Only difficult part of that is shoes, I usually find it difficult to find second hand quality (especially warm) shoes
As a vegan, as well, I keep hearing people say that leather and other animal products are better than plastic alternatives, but I'm honestly not sure what the animal products are treated with that might affect how they biodegrade, or the production itself. Those considerations should be weighted into these decisions, too. It may be roughly equivalent in terms of eco impact to acquire secondhand leather or secondhand plastic or secondhand plant materials.
My amazing in laws gave each of their children a pre-inheritance when they bought their first house. It was a very kind and surprising gift. My family are straight up poor. I had a panic attack in my youth and googled “can you inherit debt”.
As a conventionally unattractive person (in NYC), sometimes having confidence in yourself is viewed as "conceit" or "delusion". More than one of us have heard ppl talking behind our backs about it.
I've had the same experience... I'm fat in Southern California.
thats terrible
God, I hate people.
That's rough
Confidence is necessary to survive, attractive or not, but if all you bring to the table is your looks, it's very hard for me to take you seriously.
If you invite, you pay. This is how it has always been in my country and I like it this way. At least I know where I am standing. Love your videos!
Ești din România? 🤔 Eu aș spune că nu se aplică chestia asta la noi în țară, doar atunci când menționezi că vei face 'cinste', dacă sărbătorești ceva, de exemplu.
@@iuliaionelapetcu1411 Da , sunt din Romania si eu asa am invatat. Am aplicat aceasta regula toata viata, inclusiv in lunga perioada in care am trait in strainatate. Trebuie sa ai in vedere ca noi suntem din generatii diferite si multe lucruri s-au schimbat de-a lungul anilor, inclusiv cutume si obiceiuri. E doar opinia mea, cu siguranta ca tanara generatie isi croieste acum propriile reguli si e firesc sa fie asa. All the best!
I really don't like this sentiment at all. They're already providing a place for us to be, I'm more than happy to split the cost of food or whatever.
My friends and I also tend to help the hosts to shop, cook and wash dishes to make it as lite of a burden as possible. This makes people more than happy to host at a whim and as such we can meet more often.
It really depends on the culture imo. Don’t ASUME it, COMMUNICATE!!! I am from Germany and I prefer to split.
I’m American and I’ve never been asked to pay for a party’s food if it wasn’t expressly stated it was some kind of pot luck. It’s expected to bring a drink or dessert though.
Chelsea: I'm the hottest girl in Iowa!
Me: I'm adding this to my morning motivational speech.
as a midwesterner from a state that's dangerously close to Iowa, & as someone who was raised in NYS & as someone who knows that a large plurality of American models come from the middlebits I'm just gonna say y'all can hate & I understand why
@@j.r.4627 middlebits hahahaha this is what the non coastal part of america shall now be refered to, the middlebits
... Cries in Iowa.
How many of the tall, pretty people in LA and NYC are originally from there? Not many. They’ve all come from Iowa or Indiana or Ohio or somewhere else boring in the middle of the country.
@@lulubelle65 Yes, but they move to the coasts and stay and breed, and have done so for at least six generations, so now the coasts are more populated with pretty people.
Talking about pretty privileged, My experience is more of “looking wealthy” privilege. I can see how people treating me in my well put together semi formal clothes compared to my comfortable look. I talked about getting free stuff from service and getting a respect from strangers.
banks are notorious for this 🙄
I agree with this. It is more about taking care of oneself and being put together than being pretty.
The way you defined intentionality - that’s exactly what minimalism is. It’s spot on.
There’s a lot of confusion with minimalism, because it can be presented in a way that ONLY focuses on owning next to nothing. Poverty is not synonymous with minimalism, because the ability to purchase things is not a choice here. That is not to say that poverty and minimalism are mutually exclusive. The core value of minimalism intentionality, and it goes so much deeper than the number of clothes you have in the closet. It’s really a process of reflecting on your decisions and defining what your priorities are.
Minimalism is not limited to just stuff, it really trickles down into how we perceive relationships, our life choices, and figuring out the motivating factors for why we do what we do. It’s a practice that sets you free as you reflect, and there’s really no end point. It’s a lifelong prioritization of ourselves and others, and recognizing that our things serve to enhance our lives but not control them.
A lot of leaders would benefit from embracing these values because they focus on what truly matters.... and it’s not STUFF!
also, if throw pillows make you smile and you enjoy them, you’re actually already in line with what minimalism is all about :)
As an avid reader I feel like a lot of books have difficulty being adapted into movies because of the inner monologue. Characters are often going through a lot inside, which can change how they are viewed when you are on the outside, seeing their face and not being in their head. It's why Harry Potter seems nicer in the movies than the books, because in the books you see his snarky thoughts.
When my friends ask me if I'm frugal with my money, I tell them that I'm intentional with spending my money. I wish people would understand that there's more than one way to make chicken.
As young adults where we’re all struggling, my old roommate had a sort of policy for a food get togethers to bring something or give the host $5 to buy more food for the event. Establishing that ahead of the party always helped people plan to their own means and time!
for food get togethers, I think it's pretty unspoken that everyone should bring something, whether it's a bottle of wine, homecooked food, or some other food item, and that the host doesnt venmo request after lmao
This is pretty much what my jobs would do. We'd either do potlucks and everyone bring something or we'd each pay $5 or $10 to have pizza.
So on the ethics of individual purchases---buying from a manufacturer with good labor practices isn't gonna end labor abuse, but it does mean some people are employed under fair conditions who otherwise wouldn't be. That's not a systematic fix, but it's a real change in the lives of those particular people.
I think the whole concept of tipping is absolutely RIDICULOUS. It's the restaurant's way of saying "we're letting you decide if the waiter will make a living wage today, yay". I'm sorry, WHAT? Since it's already "expected" of people to tip at the very least 15-20%, why not incorporate that into the price to begin with, and then let the customer decide if they want to add something extra for the excellent service. Is that too difficult for americans to grasp?!
Why not just increase the pay standards. Tipping in America is ridiculous! It's not something common across the world, especially Asia. Here you tip to say thank you for the good service not because you need to pay your portion of the waiters rent
I would love to move towards no tipping and I'm supportive of restaurants that try but it's been really hard for places to stick to it. I feel that it's a symptom of a larger issue of lack of society safety nets. Removing tipping shouldn't result in hugely increased costs for the business while the server ALSO makes less overall money which as far as I can tell, is usually how it ends up.
ive been saying this for years since I was 18 (I'm 33 now) and every time I'm met with disdain. esp from friends who've worked in the restaurant industry. like i FEEL you but it's not my responsibility to pay you what you don't make. that's at its core a shitty job industry that's set up that way. i want to tip because I feel generous in gratitude but most often than not it's out of spite and begrudging obligation and I straight up resent restaurants b/c of it.
Oh, I (and probably many other Americans) agree wholeheartedly. I would love to move away from tipping as expected wages and just go toward a practice of tipping as a rare treat for exceptional service. It's silly for the reason you gave, but it's also really silly because it gets really confusing what services are expected to be tipped and how much you are supposed to be tipping them. Waitstaff, hotel cleaning services, manicurists, hairdressers, bar tenders, cab drivers, valets, etc. Even Americans get confused by whether they are supposed to tip for something and, if so, how much. (I got a dog recently and found myself googling whether it's standard to tip dog groomers!) I would so much rather move away from it. But tipping is very deeply ingrained in American service work at this point. Shifting the culture in that regard is not at all easy.
Yeah, I don’t think it’s that most Americans WANT the system of tipping to be set up the way that it is. It’s confusing and annoying. Making and implementing the change is the likely the real issue here.
On your first point about tipping, it was the poor college students and younger people that were kinder and tipped well compared to older wealthier people.
In college when we'd go out in a big group, we'd all be ordering just a small amount of food (cuz we poor) and tip basically a 100% tip to make up for it.
Thats a good thing though.
@@cbpd89 I don't understand the tipping thing in America, it's so weird, you have to tip to make up for having a small order, you forced to tip every time even if you don't like the service?
Here in Europe we tip if had a special service or if we want, it's not a obligation and we don't have a specific percentage.
@@afrikan_criola1923 Waiters are paid below minimum wage so tips are the majority of their wage. This means wait staff depend on the mood of strangers in order to afford rent.
Early on in my career when I was cute (not anymore lol), I was “cute,” attractive but at a very approachable level. I could see where some managers or leaders were easier on me, or more likely to develop a friendly relationship with me-maybe because I was cute. However, three times in my first year of work, I was sexually harassed by coworkers or a business partner. Now, I’m not really considered cute, so maybe I’ve lost some benefit, but I also haven’t been the target of harassment in a long time.
There’s probably an age component to that, too.
That's the flip side of pretty privilege.
I’m 24, trying to start a career, and also very pretty. I’ve been dealing with so much sexual harassment and just general bullshit from male boomers. The ceo of my former company asked if I was a virgin on a Zoom call with the entire company, as an example. I just started working for an entirely women run organization and I’m valued as a human for the first time in my professional life. I have a lot of privileges as a hot young woman, but there’s a real downside too.
I’m fat, like obese fat. And I’m fat by choice, when I was in my early teens I tried to lose weight, and I did but the attention I got from strangers made me so uncomfortable that I gained that weight. This is no longer the sole reason why I’m fat but it’s still a considerable reason.
I felt this on a deep level. I’m a busty woman and when I was thin and young I could not walk down the street without being harassed. I think subconsciously I gained weight to make it stop. Now I’m older and want to be thin again.
The term “pretty privilege” might be new but awareness and studies of it have existed for a very long time. It might have been broken up into individual topics and not all in one place e.g. the example you cited around CEOs’ average heights, or others e.g. conventionally attractive ppl receiving laxer criminal penalties, or cute kids having an easier time at school, but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t been being talked about.
The studies exist, and in academia/sociology circles, i think it's commonly known, but i don't think it's really talked about broadly the way that white or male privilege now are
There is a famous and since replicated study about children learning more from attractive teachers. Ditto for taller people being given more responsibility and leadership opportunity.
Imagine my lack of surprise when I started working at a very large bank in NYC in my mid-30s (in a lower-level role despite a graduate degree and related experience) and felt like I had barged into a supermodel convention whenever I went to the cafeteria.
No lie - there were so many former Olympians working there that they had an entire week of different lunchtime panel discussions so they could all take part.
Psychology has a term for it too: "the halo effect".
lookism
Especially for women. The last corporation I worked for almost all female leaders were tiny blonde tan women. The exceptions were token asian american and african american women.
It made me feel like I wouldn't be able to succeed there. I had 20 times the work accomplishments and industry awards as my blonde co-workers (who struggeled with basic concepts and were constantly flirting with married middle aged men there) because I'm chubby and brunette I wasn't promoted to leadership roles and they were.
I was so happy to leave and saw multiple other non- blonde tan thin women leave for likely the same reason.
Love the “let’s police what rich people spend on” instead of looking at those less fortunate making fun purchases
The idea of ‘policing’ the purchases of anyone we don’t personally know - regardless of their financial status - is inappropriate.
It kills me when people insist that because the wealthy worked hard for their money, there should be nobody just changing the tax system to something that allows all hard working people to keep a portion of their money that allow them to have a roof over their heads and food for their families. Why are there tax laws that let billionaires write off their losses and write off their rental properties and write off depreciation on their private jets while the rest of us never have tax plan overhauls that allow them to keep more of their money. Everyone loves the SALT deduction that makes the wealthy pay more, but it doesn’t because they have other laws to float their money right back to them. All the middle and lower middle New York State residents I know have had their taxes increased by 3,000 to 10.000 so again the rich gain on the middle class. How do we let the grave injustice in this tax plan stand?
@@KyleBigler I will die being fine with it up the food chain.
Why should we be care about what those 'less fortunate' do with their money? No number of "fun" purchases as defined by a single mum on food stamps will ever approach the sheer environmental impact of a private plane or boat, just for a start. The rich can do more for good or evil, thus they 'earned' the burden of being watched more critically. Much is expected from those to whom much has been given.
Wooord yes!!!!
A great vlog, as always. I love the phrase 'nickle and diming'. Last summer a friend was admiring the colour of our recently painted lounge and said she'd love to paint her hall the same colour. As we had a good amount of paint left over, I said she could use some of ours. Then she said she hated decorating. I love it so I offered to paint her hall too. Next, she said we'd need a new paintbrush. I told her not to worry as I had plenty already. She insisted on buying a cheap paintbrush and then asked me for the money (1,82 dollars), pointing out that it would be mine to take home as she'd never use it again. I reluctantly paid up but, of course, I never did get that paintbrush as she wanted to hang onto it to touch up (she'd poured some additional paint into a jam jar). The whole experience kind of tainted our relationship, especially when - a few weeks later - she announced she'd need the paint back from me as she'd like the lounge painted in the same colour! That was the point where I realised who the mug was and said 'no'!!
One of my biggest pet peeves is when opponents of the estate tax say “that’s the government double taxing the money!” Like, yeah. All money is taxed a million times. You pay income taxes when you receive money, then sales tax when you buy something, and then the company you bought something from also pays taxes (at least theoretically). In addition to Chelsea’s point of why are the kids of rich parents more deserving of the money, why are they entitled to not have to pay taxes on the money they didn’t work for?
I once overheard some rich people saying inheritance tax was taxing the money twice. Most only see what they want to see. It was almost as if they don't see their kids as separate people, just another possession/extension of themselves. They can't relate to working so hard at some crappy job for crappy pay and paying 25% tax on that money while some rich kid does absolutely nothing but get free money AND get it at a lower tax rate! Infuriating!
I want to reply to the immense truth here but I will legit spontaneously combust, and this is not that day!
capital gains isn't earned but considered earnings, it's basically slavery because income tax is the one people need to live but it's higher
I definitely agree with you. The only time I feel weird about increasing the estate tax is if the person only left behind a primary residence. Like if you’re middle to lower class and your grandma passes and leaves you her house, you shouldn’t have to sell the house to pay the estate tax. IMO the estate tax shouldnt be a flat rate but change based on how much you have and how much you’re getting. If you have hella assets and grandmas house is going to be a 3rd property for you, then that person should be taxed more than the college kid who only owns a 2k beater car and a laptop
@@seabreeze4559 The estate tax only applies to estates over $11.7 million. Additionally, the estate tax is indexed like the federal income tax, so the higher the value of estates over the exemption amount, the higher a rate they pay.
THANK YOU for talking about attractive privilege. I just.. yes. So well said. It's a hard one. And I think that the subjective nature is what makes it that much more difficult. Unlike class or ethnicity that can be easily identified. But as a whole, yes. I do think it's like any other privilege where it doesn't mean that your life is perfect, you are automatically confident, or you don't have to work hard.. it just means that your hard work goes way further than those who aren't perceived as attractive. Like, has anyone noticed that we only love a certain group when we find the most attractive person of that group. We love big girls when they look like Ashley Graham, we love vitiligo girls when they look like Winnie Harlow, we love dark skin girls when we look like v secret models, we love breastfeeding moms when they look like Chrissy Teigan, and so on. I see so often that we love an oppressed group when we find ones that society deems the exception. I know I sound so bitter but it's just because this topic is finally coming to light.
damn, this is a great point.
The coffee and cocktail thing has probably more to do with a certain kind of victimhood. We all have friends who moan about how it is everyone else's fault that they don't have money, but go on spending a ton on useless stuff. I don't have time for this, mate.
That’s what I was thinking .
This!!!
I have saved hundreds of dollars bringing my own coffee and french press to work. Most organizations have hot water. I save a lot of time too.
I bought an espresso machine on sale last year for 300$ and haven't bought coffee from the store since. Honestly, it saved me so much money, it's one of the best purchases I made. Plus those fancy starbucks dessert drinks are terrible for your health and wallet.
We can criticize the whole "5$ daily coffee" discourse for not taking into consideration the systemic issues but it still doesn't make sense to buy coffee every. single. day.
@@ahocka Me too!
I wouldn't mind going to a party where everyone had to chip in for the expense as long as that arrangement was made clear before the party. I have been in uncomfortable situations where I was the "rich person" getting a free meal from "poorer" people.
Bring a gift for your host and be a good guest...no worries. Positive vibes from New Hampshire and remember to be kind to each other and yourself during this pandemic and social crisis
I don’t have much but I still love to treat my friend and family once in a while, no matter how much everyone makes. It’s not about the cost, it’s about being generous when possible
Yes! I totally get that. I'm a college student so I fully expect some of my (pre-COVID) get togethers to include a fee. We're all broke, I'll chip in $10 for drinks and food. But some of my friends are much wealthier and don't have that financial stress and it always strikes me as odd what they decide to make me chip in for or not to chip in for. It's strange!
Something my friends often do as hosts is provide food, sometimes snacks only, beer and soft drinks (tap water, soda, juices) and ask people to bring whatever alcohol they want to drink because that tends to be most expensive, people can bring their own alcohol and they usually share most/all of it with the others.
I think most of us have been to BYOB (bring your own booze) parties and have no problem with that because it is always known ahead of time.
I am watching that pothos in the background grow from episode to episode
Yesssss!! Me too! Grow plant grow!
x3
The process of making real leather is actually very resource intensive and harmful for the environment. In that sense it is even worse for the environment than the typical faux (plastic) leather, although real leather tends to be more durable. However, in my experience, good quality vegan (plastic) leather is much more durable than fast fashion faux (plastic) leather. And of course there are some brands that are already using plant-based leather made from pineapple and cacti, although that tends to be more expensive. So not all faux leather is created equal. Personally, I would buy second-hand or buy vegan leather.
Faux leather made from pineapples, mushrooms etc is 99.9% coated in plastic, and the argument of plastic being better for the environment than leather is laughable, the gases that plastic puts off in the milliom of years it takes to degrade is far worse than a poor cow burping
@@caoimhenimhuireadhaigh1303 i wish the issue with leather production was just a poor cow burping! unfortunately, there are many issues surrounding the leather industry, especially globally, such as the use of toxic chemicals in leather tanning (there are multiple methods to tan leather hides, but one popular method uses chromium) that are often not disposed of properly; the exploitation of workers, including children in many countries, in tanneries resulting in serious injuries and exposure to harmful chemicals, as well as the exploitation of workers in garment factors that make the final leather goods. that’s not even getting into the environmental issues with animal agriculture, such as pollution, loss of native flora/fauna, the amount of water it takes to support raising cattle, or the types of abuse the animals face.
there’s a lot of info about the issues surrounding leather production from global labor organizations and environmental organizations! there’s also a very good documentary by the german news channel dw on luxury fashion called “luxury: behind the mirror of high end fashion” that investigates some labor conditions in italy and animal farming conditions in china
@@folieadork I don't disagree with you, but there is just as many problems with the production of plastic materials in those same areas, workers being exposed to toxic chemicals, environments being destroyed by the waste from production (both by chemicals and physical items). The pollution and degradation of environments by the production of plastic is horrific. Let's not forget that it's made from oil, a finite resource, and the horrific things done in the pursuit of oil e.g. wars that have displaced and killed millions of people, the ruination of sacred lands, oil spills killing marine wildlife.
You have to take into account from start to finish the impacts of both materials, and to be blunt, there hasn't been a war over leather in a couple thousand years, if my preliminary research is correct
@@caoimhenimhuireadhaigh1303 - The amount of oil used to make plastic is small compared to the amount of fuel needed to raise animals. 1/3 of global fuel is required for animal husbandry. Let's also remember that vegan leather doesn't have to be plastic. But more importantly is that if you truly want to be eco-friendly, you'd avoid leather altogether, vegan or otherwise. I don't get why we're reduced to only 2 choices when there are a multitude of other materials that can be used.
@@caoimhenimhuireadhaigh1303 - Btw it's more than burps that are negatively associated with cows. They make millions of tons of fecal waste that is either sprayed into the air causing locals to develop asthma, lung cancer, pulmonary fibrosis, etc. - OR it's stored on land, which overexposes the soil to nitrogen and causes degradation of nutrients - OR its washed away as run-off into our rivers & waterways, which leads to algae blooms & hypoxic dead zones that kill marine life. The Gulf Sea under Mexico has the largest dead zone. The swimmers at the Rio Olympics in Brazil couldn't compete since the algae blooms were so bad, bc they could suffocate. It's a domino effect that impacts us numerous ways.
And that's not all. In order to breed enough cattle to feed populations, you need to breed ALOT of cattle. Nearly 35% of land depletion is due to grazing. And if you want to feed 1000 lb cattle, you need to grow alot of food. You'd need 14x to 21x the amount of land to feed cattle than growing grains or vegetables to feed humans. In fact, there's not enough arable land in America anymore, that Big Ag has resorted to "corporate land grabs" in other countries - which displaces Indigenous people and tribes into homelessness. Up to 91% of Amazonian deforestation is due to animal agriculture. Or how about the fact that environmental activists who fight Animal Ag are assassinated anywhere from 2 to 4 times every year. Animal Ag is a MAFIA, they have the govt by the balls bc they control legislation via lobbyists, and the regulating bodies of the USDA, FDA, CDC, OSHA, etc. who are supposed to police them are in bed with them.
Oh I keep remembering more ways that cattle hurt the environment. Another way is that they need lots of omega 3s to grow, so they're fed fish pellets. That's right, the #1 predator in the ocean is actually the cow. The amount of overfishing needed to fatten up cows is causing pollution and extinction in our oceans. And all bc people want a burger or leather couch.
Now add the fact that raising animals requires 1/3 of our global freshwater resources and 1/3 of our global fuel source. Do you still think natural leather is better for the environment? You know what's crazy, I'm not even vegan. But I'm definitely for us cutting out as much meat, dairy, and other animal products as is personally feasible.
I’ve been vegan for 5+ years for all the reasons, and the leather discussion is a tricky one. There’s a lot of nuance to it.
The point about standard “vegan leather” just being plastic is a fair point. It does have a host of its own environmental issues. And even within that, there’s complexity. For example, PU is a less toxic option than PVC. You can also get recycled options, like I have a pair of adidas leather look sneakers that are from recycled plastic. But yes, some people absolutely just whack vegan branding on it for marketing, and sometimes it’s technically not even, if you break it down to components like glue.
But then leather production is also shocking for the environment. It uses a lot of water and chemicals for the tanning etc, not to mention the environmental impact of raising the cattle in the first place. And as far as I’m aware, leather, dairy and meat are often from different cattle raised for different purposes, unless it’s really cheap quality stuff sometimes I suppose, or a company who has gone out of their way to source leather from cows slaughtered for meat.
Logically speaking, I think you’re right. Second hand leather is the overall best option environmentally and ethically. But I personally am grossed out touching real leather, I’ve tried to get over that but it makes me shudder. But regardless of being vegan, I would never judge someone for buying second hand leather. I genuinely support it. I think it’s a very good option.
This does then kind of segue into other things like fur… which I think then becomes even more tricky, because even if you’re buying it second hand, you’re normalising wearing it, and people aren’t going to know it’s second hand just from seeing it and then may go out and buy new fur. Whereas I feel like with leather, it’s less obvious by looking at it whether it’s real or fake.
And actually to circle back, then there’s the whole growing industry of vegan plant based leather, which I think is very cool. Such as pinatex, which is made from pineapple leaves from crops that are already being grown and harvested, and there’s even mushroom leather and all sorts of things coming out. So what’s cool about them is that they are biodegradable.
So then it comes down to buying new plant based leather vs second hand real leather. Which often is going to also be largely decided by budget. And then there’s always the option of buying second hand standard “vegan leather.” I found a fantastic PU leather jacket second hand, but I also will say the neck has peeled a little. That’s another problem.
I don’t think there’s an obvious THIS IS BEST answer, essentially you have to weigh up the pros and cons of each and your personal values and just try to make the best decision possible. And I mean simply just not buying anything sometimes is the best option (though not always fun or even practical/possible).
TLDR: it’s complex, as a vegan I’m not against second hand leather
For me the thing that puts leather above any of the vegan options is just the fact that it lasts! Even if it's more environmentally damaging it can go through 3 or 4 (or more) owners in it's lifetime before finally hitting the landfill. As far as I know there is NO faux leather that lasts like the real thing. The plasticizers used in its production are inherently unstable and will dry and disentograte no matter if it's worn or not. I completely swore off faux leathers after I had a very expensive pair of boots fall apart after only 2 winters of wear. Meanwhile my 35 year old real leather boots I inherited from my grandmother are still wearable and repairable today.
I totally agree with U
"Hitting the wasp nest that is veganism with a baseball bat today" cracked this vegan up for about a minute.
I'm always ready for a swarm. 😁
@@SheilaR.08 cool
When we go out with friends, de facto everyone pays for their own orders and tips accordingly. That way everyone is in complete control over their food, drink and wallets. If we're having a party/bbq/whatever, the host will specify whether it's a potluck, and we're just happy with whatever people bring, whether it's fancy or cheap, homemade or from a store. We don't even pull faces if someone doesn't bring something at all, because the important thing is seeing each other (and there's always too much left at the end anyways).
I don't bring anything to a potluck because often there is too much food and I'm just doing everyone a favor by not obligating someone to take left overs home or just trashing it.
Same. And even if it's not potluck, I always ask if there is anything I can bring.
@@sor3999 - you could offer to bring drinks, plates, napkins, etc.
I find the argument against vegan leather frustrating because all of the points brought against it also apply to animal skin:
✔️Poor working conditions (can apply anywhere. Make sure to check on certifications for fair trade working conditions if this is a concern (which it should be). Slaughterhouses, however, are notorious for awful working conditions.)
✔️Bad for the environment (raising cows is incredibly harmful for the environment, and leather is treated with toxic chemicals that are bad for both workers and the environment turning the leather into skin that doesn’t decompose - meaning it doesn’t degrade quickly (probably around 100 years) when tossed away just like pvc (though it will take pvc longer to fully break down))
And then, of course, there’s the added factor that animal leather requires the death of a living being to produce (and yes, most leather (especially high end leather) comes from animals raised specifically for their skin).
All this being said, buy secondhand like Chelsea said! Secondhand anything is going to be better for the environment than something new. And support companies that are producing leather goods with new innovative sustainable, and eco-friendly materials like pineapple leather and mushroom leather or maybe even move towards other materials entirely like cork!
Thank you for coming to my TED talk 🙏
(And check out the 2017 Pulse of the Fashion Industry Report for some helpful graphs that demonstrate the comparative environmental impact of animal leather and vegan leather. Spoiler: animal leather had a much larger impact.)
Some info about leather:
There seems to be this false idea that leather is “natural” while faux leather is fake and plastic. It’s not that straight forward, as both products have to go through a long process before becoming usable.
Besides longevity, leather really isn’t that much better than faux leather. Cows are very resource intensive, and leather is treated to not break down, and when it does it releases toxins. Also, *leather does not come from meat cows*, cows are bred for specific purposes, and those that are bred for leather might not have the most desirable meat. I’m sure the meat is sold as a byproduct, maybe inferior meat or pet food, but leather is not by any means a byproduct, it is the product.
A part of veganism as a moral stance is stopping viewing animals as a commodities, as buying second hand leather is still purchasing the processed skin of another being.
Personally I don’t have a problem with other people buying second hand leather, but they can also buy second hand faux leather, which will reduce the environmental impact of it.
Thanks for coming to my ted talk
I've had my second hand leather belt for about 20 years now, and it was already broken in when I bought it. I don't think you can compare the longevity of any faux leather on the market to high quality real leather
@@supernova622 while I agree with you that faux leather is nowhere near the quality of animal leather, I don’t the the issue is the faux is inherently bad. I think we’ve been using leather and hide for thousands of years and really learned to perfect them, faux leather needs to be improved a lot more to get to that level. Plastic is just very cheap and easy to make, which makes it a tempting choice to use for products.
Many companies have overused the vegan leather term to appeal to a certain group of people although it seems not much better for the planet. It would degrade slower than organic materials. Plus, vegan leather is not as attractive to buy second hand. I think vegan "leather" isn't good any way you see it.
@@supernova622 I've had my faux purses, belts, totes, and wallets for decades. They're going strong, and no one died. Add to that the land and resources intensive nature of animal agriculture, and it's an easy choice for me.
@@ignazs.5816 Strenuously disagree. I haven't purchased leather or any animal skins or other products for over 30 years. I have had no problem finding anything I need in sufficient variety and good quality.
I always wonder how many "minimalists" have a basement full of stuff at their parents' house? Also, minimalism assumes that if you declutter something and find you need it later, you can afford to replace it. It's the litter opposite for the depression mentality which our grandparents had for a reason.
I know a few people that profess to being minimalist, but in actuality they are moochers. One of these people lived with his parents all through college and for 2 years after college and saved nearly 100% of his income during that period. Also during that time he was on the his father's health insurance, car insurance and cell phone plan. He truly had no expenses aside from gasoline for his car and auto parts. He drives a 20 year old car that he bought for next to nothing. His father is a mechanical engineer that fixes cars in his spare time, so any car issues would be fixed by his father and he would just borrow one of the families' cars while his car was being repaired - his family has several cars that are constantly rotating in and out of road worthiness. When he did move out of the house he kept his residence as his parents house because he didn't want to pay the local wage taxes in his area. So he is not only a moocher, but he is also a tax evader that professes to be a minimalist.
@@randallflagg1547 why is he considered a mooch for living with his parents during and a little after college? It sounds like he was reasonably living beneath his means during his early adulthood to set a foundation for him to be more financially independent later on. His choice sounds responsible and his parents were gracious enough to allow him to stay. Depending on family circumstances, certainly not everyone is going to have that option. But it doesn’t mean that the people who take it are wrong.
@@hopscotch39 Agreed, I dont think living with parents is “mooching” if theyre ok with it. Its just a better use of resources. But the residence issue is kinda skeevy
@@randallflagg1547 parasitism is a psychopath sign
trust fund babies, classism
being attractive also comes down largely to money. If i had a ton of money this 5 could be an 8! I know it lol
sure, most celebrities looked quite ordinary before they become famous. skin care, surgery, personal trainer, stylist…
Can you do an episode on the disappearance of the FDIC insured 5.25% savings accounts. They disappeared in the 80's with deregulation and the S&L scandal but you could walk into a Savings & Loan, and for as little as $10 open an account with 5.25% annual interest GUARANTEED, federally insured. They destroyed these to force people into the stock market. But imagine having an insured, guaranteed account with that sort of interest rate. Seriously, no one talks about this but it is one of the reasons boomers were able to accumulate so much wealth.
Tipping thing only works in US. Cause most the rest of world actually pays their servers and kitchen staff well lol
Yeah... do we really need to be tipping 18% if our servers are earning $15/hour.
@@betsyc5158 almost no server makes that much hourly... it’s usually like $5 or less plus tips
tipping is done around the world... leave the small change on the table for the waiter for good service (a euro, a buck)... diners just aren't required to pay the full paycheck like in the US.
Exactly you just tip the change and it’s fine.
If someone goes up and over you kan tip more to show your appreciation, but tipping because the restaurant doesn’t pay their staff is just ridiculous
Where I live staff get regular pay and service charge is included in the price of the food so they also collect extra money at the end of the month
I can say, as a vegan, vintage/used leather is awesome. High quality product without extra suffering or resources going into it. I don’t own any personally, cause I’m just not the biggest fan of leather, but I would never hate on used leather
Thrift stores are the best...most of the time I find things that are almost new...last time 2 tops, tags still on, one was $65...I paid $12( yay). And you can drop off the things you stopped wearing.
it stinks though
When you really connect with the fact that you're wearing someone's skin, someone, an individual, a person who died in fear and confusion begging for his or her life, then wearing leather feels unnecessary, to say the least.
It does smell bad, new or used.
OMG I adore you! There's no one who cuts to the quick as effectively as you do when blending wealth topics with social justice. Keep up the good work! (A little love from the gay guys portion of your demographic ha ha)
❤️❤️❤️ random sign of love 😀
As someone who is reasonably attractive, but also not that pretty, and often not pretty enough, let me tell you subjective is the perfect word for it. My advice is try to keep in mind that there is always someone "prettier" than you, and there is always someone "prettier" than them. Not only does the person who does the hiring/picking/judging have their own standards of what pretty is, if the person in charge resents how attractive you are (or they perceive you to be), it can go the other way too. I'm sure I've been at far opposite ends of the "beauty" spectrum depending on where I am, what I'm doing, and the kind of day I'm having.
I can confirm that 'pajamas and flip-flops in Walmart at 2am because you just really needed a specific pint of ice cream' is pretty on nobody, so we have that great equalizer at least.
It's all very much in the eye of the beholder. I will never have legs or a butt that will impress anybody probably. I am okay with this now. Figure out what you're most proud of with yourself and cherish that.
I've often thought that there is such a thing as the attractiveness bias, but I also think it's more complicated than just being born pretty. I think it stems in some cases from being poor or being somewhat neglected growing up. Being able to afford shampoo that actually cleans your hair, having parents that have the inclination and money to teach you to brush your teeth and take you to the dentist, that brush your hair, and teach you basic hygiene. These things make a difference to your "attractiveness" in early life, which then impact your mental health and confidence. All that put together can make an "attractive" or "unattractive" adult.
that counts until you are 18.
Attractive privelage isn't discussed because there's no objective attractiveness metric and there's really no way to acknowledge your own attractiveness privelage without coming across as incredibly conceited. In fact, many people who are pretty attractive are probably at least somewhat insecure about whether or not they are themselves.
Simultaneously, its never really OK to tell someone you acknowledge their lack of attractiveness privelage, no matter who they are. "Body positivity" norms sort of mandate telling everyone that they're "beautiful" or other attractive terms, even if they really aren't to most people. It's impossible to express sincere good intentioned sympathy for someone for being ugly.
By this same token, in the video, she had one line about the downfalls of being too pretty, but that's something that isn't discussed either because the conversation quickly turns to, 'oh wow, yeah, I WISH I had THOSE problems.'
Attractiveness has a lot to do with how you dress yourself. Most executives have the money to look hot.
I was thinking this. You might not have to be hot but you definitely need straight teeth
@@shnn1a 😂
This is so true and I a wondering if a good rebuttal for those who claim they are ugly would be, " Youre not ugly, you just dress poor." 💀
You're right! Things like tailoring, braces, exercise, haircare, and skincare can radically transform a person's appearance in small ways but are not fully accessible unless you have lots of time and money. Certain types of attractiveness can be class signifiers, so this whole thing is way more complicated than Hot Person Bad.
That's a chicken and egg situation though. They likely were already attractive and that that helped them reach their position to make themselves more attractive. You can't buy being 6'4" after all.
‘We overstate the extent to which hard work matters’ I have never heard something truer
The second opinion reminds me of this “theory” that I have, that the only people for whom the law of attraction/manifesting works for are attractive or come from wealth. And they’re the only people who truly believe it works because they don’t want to admit that they haven’t actually earned the things they have.
Wealth and attractiveness and having to earn everything in life otherwise aside, a lot of what people preach for law of attraction and manifesting are simply practices for gratitude and intentionality that are co-opted from yoga and/or meditation classes as well as the major spiritual scriptures, which seems to be the bigger discussion that needs to be addressed. It's much easier to realize your goals if you can learn to hit pause on the endless rumination spirals of self-doubt and/or self-loathing and instead visualize/affirm/write on the belief that somehow there is a way to experience everything that you actually desire and to actually embody the feeling of having already achieved all of that whenever the topic comes to mind. It's about diligently redirecting your focus and awareness in a nonjudgmental fashion away from the problem and more toward a space that contains the solution. This can be applied by all people, regardless of circumstance.
Sure, what you need to do to actually move forward in that preferred direction may not be immediately clear, but the idea is to cultivate that trust and Faith that things will work out for you one way or another, and all you need to do in the meantime is to be open to new opportunities as they present themselves in their own time as you continue to lead your life. As long as you don't dwell constantly in despair and don't let the transgressions of the past fester inside of you and don't allow yourself to constantly panic about the uncertainty of the future, this is much easier to do. There are many parallels between this and learning to become more emotionally stable and assertive. As you practice gratitude and visualization, you will get a better sense of what you actually want, what your boundaries are, how to meet your needs, and how to strengthen your self-concept in a way that fuels your desire to take initiative each day and experiment with trial and error. I would go as far as to say that it's another way to shift from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset by changing your core beliefs in a way that is favorable and leads to greater resilience and patience.
When done right, you are less affected by the challenges in life and seek new creative ways of working through perceived obstacles or are less concerned about pivoting and trying a novel approach as it will all work itself out. Obsessively trying to manipulate things and people in the physical world is so much more effortful than choosing to drop all of the worries and tension and deciding unwaveringly that what you want is already yours internally. You don't need to go out of your way to force anything, and it will all show up better than you could have imagined. As a side benefit, you will be more pleasant to be around because you will be triggered less and less by old feelings of lack, insecurity, and worthlessness. Yes, it still requires practice and consistency initially to cultivate a new outlook and reach those states of calm inner knowing, but there is far less strain involved.
@@letsdomath1750 But also, when something goes well, you will naturally ascribe a rationale and story for why it did. It’s somewhat of a confirmation bias at work. Those who share their LoA success stories don’t actually know why something went well and, if it happened to match a stated desire, they will credit LoA instead of, say, “I happened to meet someone who worked there while I was at an industry event and she passed along my resume…” Plus, you don’t hear about the unsuccessful stories, of which there surely are plenty. LoA is more or less the theory that if you throw enough darts and are open to where they land, you’ll find that some stick and lead you…somewhere…eventually…
@@emiliabolsas "if you throw enough darts and are open to where they land, you’ll find that some stick and lead you…somewhere…eventually…"
Yeah, for sure, that's pretty much it. You are indeed using a form of confirmation bias to train yourself to not dwell on setbacks and failures but to keep your sight steady on what you want. In other words, keep going, continue selecting things that enrich you moment by moment in a conscious and deliberate manner, be grateful for the wins you get along the way, and enjoy your life as it continues to unfold. All the while you remind yourself that what you want is yours, and it is done. If it takes a second or two years, that matters not because you know it's yours and will be able to savor it for a long time. Full stop.
True, there are plenty of stories of people who got burned out and didn't see the results they wanted, and I have read plenty of them, but the common denominator is that you must persist, despite all odds. Even if you first experience the complete opposite of your desire, you must still persist with conviction until the storm passes once and for all. Basically, you must steel your resolve and make a vow to yourself that you will not waiver.
And yes, I agree that the way in which the big break comes to fruition should be appreciated and acknowledged, but the decision to see things through was one that you made internally first and foremost. Moreover, the way things turn out in my favor may not be applicable to your particular situation at this point in time, so in your hypothetical example, for instance, the specifics of me meeting someone who works at the company and getting them to pass along my resume may not be viable for you if you live in a completely different state or country. As such, knowing the specifics of one person's rags to riches story may serve as inspiration for your own personal journey, but more often than not, copying everything they did may not be the most optimal path for you personally. There may be useful insight to glean as well as tips that can be put into practice (e.g. be open to expanding your professional network), but much of our lives and circumstances are unique to each one of us.
The phrase "maybe you manifested it, maybe it's white privilege" springs to mind.
@@hollyuni4484 Yep or a host of privileges - white, male, pretty, wealthy, American/Western…
Having weighed 70 lbs more than I do now, I know that there is a beauty privilege. When you are considered overweight and unattractive, many people ignore you and you are not heard. Also on the inverse, if you are a woman and conventionally beautiful, it can also work against you in any of the science, engineering, mechanical, etc. fields. Getting your colleagues to listen and take you seriously can be a challenge.
When my Mother's parents passed, the inheritance was given out by percentages. All three children got 25% each and all five grandchildren got 5% each.
The Chelsea Fagan story: "I'm not opposed to grandma getting hit by a bus..." lololol
trying to figure out if that is death positive or not...
"I'm a salty girl as you know" as Mona begins to lick her bhole had me dyyyying
So cute! 😍🐶🥰
"Let's police rich people's financial choices.... I'm not worried about someone buying a happy hour cocktail" YES!!!
I always wonder if those types of rich people who nickel and dime with us, nickel and dime with other rich people? Or are they trying to "teach" us something ?
Lol if that is the case, it's really rich (pardon the pun) considering most wealth is inherited
I think they actually flaunt a little bit when they are with other rich people since there is a sort of competition and maybe they might perceive them as able to return that in some sort of favour. However the rest of us mortals are not even part of the competition and they probably think that we would take advantage.
@@mfenn7325 that is false, in the US, its less than 10% of the rich who inherited their wealth.
@@marie-soleildobie7495 depends on how you define “rich” and “inherited”.
“My father gave me a small loan of a million dollars” for instance
@@mfenn7325 From multiple research I looked at couple years ago. They talked about it on Ramsey’s podcast. It was pretty interesting.
I used to go to yard sales with my best friend every weekend. We avoided wealthy neighborhoods because they would mark absolute garbage $20 while the middle class people would mark better items $2. They just thought even their garbage s was better.
Thank you for this Chelsea! I'm ugly AF and most people agree. I am fortunate to have found work online and I don't have to Zoom anyone ever.
Get into a profession where not too many pretty people go into. Avoid any sales/marketing/finance field or basically any field where dealing with people is the main focus. Luckily pretty people tend to leverage their looks in performance professions like acting or dancing so we uglos are safe from competing with them. 😅
Oh wow. what do you do? I need that job.
I very much disagree with the take on making conscious decisions. This sounds like just a way for you to justify unethical choices. These business DO care what the customers think. Why do you think there are so many more sustainable brands at places like Target now? That’s taking shelf space from a less ethical company. This is only one example and definitely does not mean that there is no impact or other misconceptions.
Sources: I am a Sustainability Consultant for private corporations and have a BS in corporate sustainability
Spot on.
In my economics course we saw its actually the worse thing to do, because the companies only cut these poor peoples jobs more instead of making ethical changes 😔
Do you work for B Corp by chance? I agree with you. I also think it's a balance. It's hard to live in the gray area where you don't always make the more ethical or sustainable choice but sometimes you do. It seems too contradictory to our brains. Sometimes we get decision fatigue. It's easy to sometimes feel like, eff it, I feel like buying cheap, or you need to be, or you don't feel you can carry that burden of choice (assuming you have a choice). Important to remember some really don't have that choice too. I guess what I'm saying is, just because you can't do it 100% doesn't mean you shouldn't try sometimes.
I think the focus of her take was more on the fact that individual choices (even though impactful in their own way) are never going to be as impactful as changes through legislation and at regulatory levels. We shouldn't just be content with saying yeah I buy this cruelty-free brand and leave it at that, but if we care, we should actually try to work in whatever way we can to influence decision- and policy-makers to punish more heavily harmful practices and incentivize sustainable ones, this way, large-scale, more impactful changes can happen.
On another note, making conscious decisions only means that you are aware that no one can live a 100% sustainable life as a consumer so you shouldn't beat yourself up about it. You can do your part as much as your personal circumstances allow you to and it shouldn't be a huge burden if you don't fit somebody else's idea of a sustainable life. Your standards are not necessarily somebody else's standards so as long as you can live your life in a way that reflects your personal values, then that's ok. We have made, make, and will continue to make unethical choices in one aspect of life or another, whether we're aware of it or not, but that doesn't mean that we're not trying to do better, or that we're terrible human beings, it just means that life is a complicated mess so the best we can do is to make conscious decisions about our lives.
@@calibby85 I do actually work for a B-Corp! Good guess! I just got lucky though, there are many positions like mine in traditional companies who are trying to improve. I 100% agree with your take. It’s hard to be perfect, try just being better. This is also relevant in the veganism for sustainability space.
I had a friend in junior high who lended me $1 one day when I was short for lunch. I had every intention of paying her back, but I forgot about it the next morning, and I will never forget how I felt when she came straight up to me first thing, hand extended, "my dollar???". She was an only child who had everything and anything she wanted it was not a case of the $1 going to make or break her life. Almost 15 years later and I still get a sick feeling in my stomach and vowed that day to NEVER make any friend feel the way she made me feel. TBH it has come at my detriment sometimes when friends don't pay me back, or take over a year to pay me back their share on a hotel (long story, and did have to confront this friend but it took me over 2 months to do it) but I'm sticking with my code. Also over the years how friends treat you in regards to money has been a good indicator of how much or if they value you and your friendship.
Giiirrll!!! Thanks for talking about pretty privilege!! I went on a weekend getaway with husband to a small mountain town and I mention to him how you could figure out who is rich by how pretty they are and is kinda ridiculous. Perfect teeth, skin, make up, cute clothing, etc
If a friend tried to charge me for groceries at her party we wouldn't be friends any more.
This version of Chelsea is my favorite. Keep em coming please
I think many middle class families do have the "inheritance to grandchildren " thing. My grandmother's stuff went to her children (we were all under 10), but most of her money went into bonds for us. And I have heard similar stories elsewhere.
I didn't receive anything from my grandmother when she died, nor was I expecting anything. One of my uncles had already bleed my grandmother dry while she was still alive; in order to fund his various businesses. He believed that everyone else in the family, including my grandmother would just squander my grandmother's money. The poor woman lived a very frugal lifestyle, many due to surviving the great depression and losing her husband in the early 70s to cancer that was likely caused by asbestos exposure from working in the steel industry in the 50s and 60s.
Ma'am, you have not met my aunt. She was serving burgers at a family thing, where we all brought items, but being herself, there was no cheese, no ketchup or pickles. Because everyone has to have cheese on the burger, or hot dog, I went to my mom's refrigerator a few houses away, and, from my own purchases, procured the required cheese. I also took a jar of pickles and, the good, expensive barbecue sauce. My aunt was then heard charging my mom 75 cents, for my slice of cheese. I even presented a receipt, from my pocket, but she still wanted everyone to pay her for the cheese.
WOW
@@terrisserose Yeah, we all say that every time, too. It makes for good memories, but, at the moment, it's all stress and unhealthy language.
@@lydialady5275 10% can relate!
CD
I'm living for mona in the video. Shes so adorable.
Agreed, I'll watch any video with a dog in it 👍
Me too....she is just so cute....and the way she also moved her head on the other side when Chelsea said "anyway"😂😂
Yeah, one of my best friends had a circle of friends who were basically trust fund babies. They were the WORST. We were making squat just out of college... most of them had a) rich parents paying their bills b) and/or high dollar jobs. They would STILL run up huge charges at a bar or restaurant... then want to 'split' the bill. Uh, that's a no for me!
Chelsea: I'm back doing my favorite thing in the world...
Mona: I sense cuddling!
Chelsea: ...which is complaining about things.
Mona: Oh :(
I know right, I’m dying at how cute Mona is! 😍🥰🐶
Lmao!
I've been vegan for 8 years now. I have so many thoughts on this.
I wholeheartedly disagree with the idea that "one person can't make a difference." Maybe not on a grand scale, but if there are enough people who are able to influence enough people, it can grow into something real that can make real change by "voting with one's wallet." And while I agree that regarding Old Navy, in the example you brought up, it's not possible for many people, veganism actually is very possible for many people. I've watched so many videos of people trying these "living on $x a day" challenges, and the first thing they give up is meat. I am vegan and will need my food budget to be about $6 a day, which is not crazy frugal, but isn't the vegan-specific products like Beyond Burgers and shopping at Whole Foods.
You also mentioned that 'clean eating' is a personal choice, and I'd agree with you, but it's not just a personal choice when it affects others' lives. Trust me, I don't follow 'clean eating' but veganism is more than just a personal choice, since there are often-ignored victims involved when not being vegan.
As for vegan leather, compared to secondhand leather, I'd prefer the secondhand leather. I don't think we should be purchasing new cow's leather, though. Even if it's from cows who were slaughtered for their meat, purchasing new leather leads to more of an incentive to continue to farm these animals.
Lastly, for human rights, of course that's an equally-important consideration in making purchasing decisions beyond animal ethics. But I find that when many people bring up human rights as an "attack" against veganism (not that you were doing that, Chelsea, you're great), it's very hypocritical, since I find most people who use this argument are not being particularly conscious about human rights in their purchasing decisions themselves, so between a vegan product with slave labor or a non-vegan product with slave labor, while neither is the best, the vegan one is probably ethically better. Besides, the working conditions for the people in the animal agriculture industry is often horrendous, so the ethics of veganism is not limited to animals.
/endrant
100% agree with this - I really like Financial Diet but I think Chelsea missed the mark on this one. Maybe because she's not vegan and the topic makes her uncomfortable.
Agreed! And the making/tanning of leather is obv bad for the animals, but it's very toxic for the humans who do it - animals aren't the only ones hurt in its production
@@Driveontheroad Yeah, when she said she wasn't going to open the can of worms about veganism, I could tell the idea made her uncomfortable, and wondered if she feels like she should be vegan if she actually thinks about it, but decides not to. Maybe that's not the case, and it's entirely speculation, but it's something I thought about.
Situation 1 (sort of on a tangent, but about having even relationships with your friends) also applies to couples/ relationships. Not putting all the financial pressure on one person to support both, example always having one person paying for everything, goes a long way. This is especially the case when you aren't merging your finances. Having a "I pay this time and you pay next time" mindset just elevates so much stress on peoples budgets cause they aren't now paying for two people but also should you break up, there wont be a feeling of owing the other person/having shelled out for the other person. Anything that eliminates unnecessary stress is a good thing
Def don't agree with the book one lol, I'm not an overly huge reader, maybe 10-15 books in a year, but for the few books I've read before the movie, the books are much better, it's just not possible to have all the detail, insight, descriptions from the book which paint an entire world reflected on screen. There are some really great movie adaptations where the movie is better, but its not the majority. But also yes, people shouldn't be shamed for not reading, and readers shouldn't be pretentious about what/how much they read.
I agree with your statement, the book is generally better than the movie. I am a fan of Stephen King and aside from IT, which I found to be a boring read, his books are better than the movies/TV shows. Side note, I refuse to watch The Dark Tower because I believe that it is impossible to condense over 4500 pages into a 3 hour movie.
this could also be due to the fact that for a lot of books, you form your own emotional attachments because you spend so much time in the character's head and world. Very few books can be read in under 2 hours. But yeah, preferring one over the other doesn't make anyone better or smarter. it's just a personal preference for how you prefer to spend your time/attention!
So many great point in this, but especially the issue of attractive privilege. So glad you spoke about this. Around 10 years ago I had a bit of surgery to fix a problem, a deformity, that was medically somewhat minor but in appearance was hugely damaging in how people perceived me and treated me. People had raging bad takes about my abilities, personality, even my interests. People who've only known me since that surgery have never made those assumptions and are confused by stories of this treatment from my past. Difference in how people perceive me is night & day. I only wish I could've had that surgery sooner!
Do you mind sharing what surgery you had?
@@Monicalala I might, depending on why you're asking. Why does it matter in the context of this video and my comment?
I have had a lifetime of explaining my condition, so I am also simply not interested in explaining it or giving details of what I had fixed 9thank you for asking instead of demanding an explanation:) ). I think it suffices to say I had a deformity in my right eye fixed. I had a surgery in childhood to fix the worst of it, and as technology progressed I was able to get it fixed a bit more/better in my 30's.
That’s just ableism and sexism, not pretty privilege
@@liliax9147 Those are part of it, for sure. They're all inter-connected. Men don't need to be pretty the way women do to succeed, so yes it is sexist, but it is still connected to privileging pretty women over "ugly' ones. It was sexism particular to the negativity about my appearance specifically, not by virtue of my femininity alone. I was literally called "ugly" to my face throughout my life, and now people tell me I'm pretty & treat me better. That's why it is pretty privilege.
@@TerriMRoberts For me, being pretty has had negatives. When I was poorer being abused and solicited because I drew a lot of attention. Relationships turning out to be fake and based on my looks. Not being taken seriously when I entered tech and accused of nasty things and sexually harassed. I'm not saying that pretty girls have it worse, I think they are equally shitty sides of the same exact oppression.
And to me, privilege implies that there's an element of oppression. In this case it would have to be pretty girls oppressing ugly girls, and that just makes no sense because men are the ones who created the ideal and enforce the consequences. Plus being prettier doesn't actually net you significant power. There are plenty of gorgeous poor girls. Class plays a part in that the more money you have the better clothes, treatments, surgeries etc you can afford to make yourself prettier. That and racism -- white women are more likely to be considered pretty and white women just happen to have white privilege which makes them more likely to be better off.
Just recently I read in a credible source (Niko Rittenau) that 40% of the leather produced is not a byproduct of the meat industry but it comes from cows that are being raised just for this purpose. Even in India where cows musn't be killed because they are considered to be holy, people drag the animals over the country border and kill them there because the leather business is so lucrative. Raising cows for leather therefore is just as much a waste of resources as it is to raise them for meat. In addition, we have to consider the ethical motives of being vegan and most vegans wouldn't buy vintage leather either because it goes against their values. I agree though that this could be a more sustainable option than buying new leather products. On the other hand, real leather is also a highly processed product which doesn't just decompose if you throw it away. Some vegan labels are experimenting with alternative natural materials such as pineapple leather or cork. Let's see where all this is going :)
Yeah I never ask friends to pay me back if we go out together because someone else will get the next round and it all evens out.
Isn’t it better to split every time? I am a student I am much more comfortable with spending 10€ every month to go out than with paying 50€ in one month and then nothing the next.
Yes to all of this, especially your take on minimalism Vs just being poor. All I would add is that whilst it makes little difference to boycott Amazon or whoever, it can make a big difference to choose to support small businesses instead, so if conscious consumerism is viewed from that perspective instead I think it's probably more impactful? But still capitalism, so whatever.
Re: buying consciously takes effort away from activism.
I completely disagree. I know soo soo sooooo many people who only got into activism due to an urge to start buying consciously. They go hand in hand with change. Companies will see the trends change to conscious consumerism and will follow that inherently. Activism and conscious consumption complement each other, not detract.
Exactly, the self-actualisation of your own morality and engagement with what you purchase and the industries that are associated, goes hand in hand as you eloquently stated.
@@ONeill01 thank you! I also find it a bit hypocritical for people to be activists but support bad industries or companies in ways they could totally control. I live by the mantra of being the change you want to see. Just because someone without the same income as me can only afford H&M doesn't mean I have to shop there too.
I also think that it’s too easy to push «poor people» in front of us and make it about elitism. If you have the money to pay for your new clothes, you should. If not someone in a third world-country will. By supporting companies that pay living wages, give sick-leave and maternal leave etc. you wont change the whole industry right away, but for those workers it means everything. If you can’t afford it, that’s fine, but if you cCAN, don’t go «but what about poor people».
Agree. For a channel that pushes voting so hard, why is boycotting/voting with one's wallet seen as pointless when voting with a ballot isn't'?
@@elinemaria 100% this. A lot of people only bring up poor people when it's useful for them.
"Confidence is a PC proxy for attractiveness" YES!!
I think one of the challenges of addressing pretty privilege is what is there that can be done about it? We know it exists but now what? Humans are attracted to pretty thing, in evolutionary terms: pretty = better/ healthier/ stronger. This obviously does not translate into abilities that are needed in our modern world, but the biological preference remains. But it is also very subjective, unlike other attributes like gender or race that can result in some sort of privilege but that can also be used to create guidelines to prevent unfair discrimination in the workplace. Like gender bias, pretty bias can be unlearned in individuals but how can guidelines based on something so subjective be enforced by employers? "You gave James a promotion because he's hot!" can be combated with "Not to me.". Furthermore there are the benefits to companies that have attractive people working in the front end with clients or customers. These attractive people result in increased profits and better deals, just because people trust them more. This is not an advantage companies will give up, and for some it is a big part of brand identity. It sucks that some people wont even be considered for a position if they are conventual unattractive, but what can we do? It's just such a difficult conversation.
Such a good point that is often overlooked as well, the "so what now?" of it all! Thanks for mentioning this!
I think it’s more about the false messages about us living under a meritocracy when there are many other factors that can determine people’s success other than hard work, knowledge and experience. One of the main ones being class but many other factors contribute but still society tells you it’s merit when it usually isn’t really.
You don’t do anything about it because pretty privilege is not a real, separate privilege. It is bits and pieces of sexism, classism, racism, and ableism.
The laugh after "i talk too much for LA" 😂
Unpopular opinion: People need to stop commenting on Veganism as if it's only an environmental decision for people? A big part of Veganism, from an animal rights perspective, is avoiding the exploitation of animals. In that case, buying the second hand leather 'because the animal is already dead' may still be against their values.
Agree with the consensus on cheap plastic leather, but I'm really tired of the animal rights perspective being ignored in these discussions.
Agreed. This would allow the debate to branch out to questions of animal rights vs human rights and what "cruelty free" ought to be, which is a whole other can of worms but still falls squarely under the umbrella of ✨harmful consequences of capitalism✨
Reminds me of that crap video that recently came out “is it wrong to be vegan”. Most vegans are for the animals, and wanting to help the environment is a part of helping the animals on this earth...
I was baffled by Chelsea's admonition to buy leather. "The cow is already dead! You're honoring him!" If people didn't want to wear or buy shoes made from dog skin she'd not be so casual. When Ed Gein made belts from the nipples of his victims, was that "honoring" those women?
I almost gave up completely on this channel a while back when she proudly proclaimed her furs were real in the middle of an otherwise overly politically correct rant. I think it's safe to assume animal rights are nowhere on her radar.
@@vegronica9006 (oversimplified) Serial killers kill for fun and flaunt their trophies bc they're mentally ill. Humans have been eating animals and utilizing their hide since hunter and gatherer days as a means to survive while minimizing wasting resources. We no longer NEED to use animal hide in our products, but unfortunately society has a plethora of problems that we're in the mide of hopefully changing for the best.
The vegan leather thing: I personally wouldn’t buy it but the confusion comes from confusing veganism with environmentalism/ethical consumption. It’s just about not using/purchasing animal products - that’s it and everything else is down to personal choice, and so it’s perfectly possible that the vegan choice may not be the most ethical or sustainable choice.
Thanks for saying this in a patient way.
Leather is definately less sustainable for the planet than the least sustainable vegan alternative. A lot of leather is not a byproduct there are many dedicated leather farms for instance a large handbag, a leather jacket or knee high leather boots. Anything that uses larger pieces of leather. When an animal is dying for someones preference, it is not a personal choice because there is a victim. A sentient being suffered a terrible death and a likely terrible life for that leather. If someone chooses to buy new leather, they are choosing to pay for an animal to be terribly abused and killed.
@@creatureofhabit5129 as a vegan myself, I do not agree that a newly produced piece of plastic is more sustainable than a second hand leather item that has already been produced. Please read what I said about “personal choice” again because I think you misunderstood - I’m saying that is the personal choice of each vegan as to whether or not they also care about their environmental impact outside of the consumption of animal products, usually it is the case but hypothetically a personal could live an extremely unsustainable lifestyle but still be vegan because they don’t consume animal products (e.g Kim k)
@@robyn6454 I see what you are saying but your original comment did not specify second hand and so in the instance of new leather, my points still stand. There are many people who won't buy second hand at all unfortunately like, as you say Kim K and indeed many of her fans. I would love to see vegan leather options in shops, for the likes of those people, much like it's good to have vegan options at KFC. And eventually, the vegan leather will make it's way to the second hand shops anyway.
@@creatureofhabit5129 I said that vegan is not always the most sustainable choice... meaning there are more sustainable options ... such as buying second hand. I’m not saying either way whether or not vegan leather is a good thing personally I don’t like the look of leather at all I was simply answering Chelsea’s question about why a vegan person might prefer plastic despite its environmental impact
Attractive privilege (along with race) - bravely explored by Cameron Russell in her TED talk ages ago!
Thank you SO MUCH for talking about the "pretty privilege." My husband is significantly older than me (a boomer, I'm a Gen-Xer) and he is drop dead gorgeous. He is a white male. He came from a certain amount of middle/upper middle-income and was able to attend college in that time where it wasn't so painfully and destructively expensive. He attended UVA out of state and got gentlemen's C's with a degree in history, spending time in the theater department. After college he sort of fell in to doing pensions, even though his math skills were atrocious (and math was important to be an actuarial back then). Then spent time in various higher end sales positions. I have always told him "oh, to be a good looking white male. You did just fine coasting through on looks and lazy. I'd be homeless."
I feel pretty privilege is a thing that favors men mostly but crippling to women in the job market (and not much better in the dating field). I stand by that. You see lots of good looking men skirt by through life but attractive women don’t get as many benefits as it seems. Getting attention isn’t always a good thing and it’s usually not in the case of women. Attractive women usually just get multiple loads of jealousy vibes, backstabbing and stalking from both genders. I saw my mom go through it and it genuinely frightened the heck out of me. Especially when her colleague tried to force her to go out with hem even though she explicitly told him she was married.
Absolute truth. I was downsized from a good agency job during menopause
Hei, great video! However the vegan leather issue is more complex. Vegan leather is more often than not not a by product. That means that animals have to be brought up, and slaughtered. This involves that there is a big amount of suffering and CO2 emissions evolved (much more than plastic). Vegan leather is not always plastic,it can be organic. And as most vegan products the quality is increasing rapidly :) Most times its higher quality than leather and virtually undestinguishable.
I think people also really underestimate how polluting and toxic leather production and dyeing is. And it's definitely not more sustainable if you're buying a new hot pink or metallic bag every season.
If anything uses animal products, it's not vegan by definition.
It's not about being "up in our asses", it's merely about preferences. I am an avid reader, and a movie lover, and there is no movie that is better than the book, because they are simply different media and should not be compared. No movie can ever adapt the book to the fullest, but that is not a bad thing, it's just a different medium with different characteristics and abilities.
Have you ever read a movie novelization though? I think it depends more on what medium the story was originally meant to be told through.
You can absolutely be poor and not a minimalist. Chelsea needs to watch hoarders. People can grab things off the side of the road or not throw out expired/damaged goods to the point it all accumulates. It's actually super common for people that grew up in low income homes to become hoarders...
Good point...
I'll be honnest - I forget which video was the first that was recommended to me by the algorithm, but my first thought really was ''Great, another woman in a fancy living room is going to make me feel bad and tell me Starbucks coffee is the reason why I'm poor'' and I was sooo pleasantly surprised. The content is very diverse, so open and so refreshing. Love it!
So glad you're finding it helpful!
...CARING ABOUT SOMEONE ELSE's (XYZ) IS TRULY A FUCKIN ROAD TO NO WHERE... I Love it! My new words to live by.
"I think a lot of our analyses along other axes, when it comes to privilege, or lack of privilege, really miss a class element" - this is so important
I've moved to buying mostly secondhand, with some new purchases when I can't find exactly what I want secondhand. Almost every dress I own was purchased secondhand, every designer item was at a massive discount (like 90%) bc of some thread being loose that I stitched back up etc. I'm definitely not a minimalist, either - it's about deciding where you want your money to go and where you can spend less/have less impact if you're in the privileged group that can make those choices. We've just got to do the best with what we have... And hold the uber wealthy and corporations accountable for the absolute WASTE they throw onto this earth with impunity.
Choosing Everlane vs H&M may not make a huge ecological or ethical difference. But buying used clothing and furniture, and buying less clothing and furniture, does (as does eating less meat and dairy - particularly less red meat and less cheese). Until we have broader regulations, individuals need to step up and make responsible choices - and the great thing is that ecologically responsible choices are also usually very financially responsible as well.
Yeah, my peak attractiveness was best described as unobtrusively pretty. Unless I was hardcore your type it took a good conversation or two for me to register. It served me well in life.
Such a accurate description. I’m gonna start using this !
It’s insane how smart and grounded this woman is, I want her to be my friend so bad 😭🌸❤️
I’ve been vegan for years. Personally I just don’t buy leather or vegan leather. It makes me uncomfortable to wear real leather... same reason I wouldn’t eat lab-grown meat even if it was ethical. Gross lol. I’ve bought some vegan leather second-hand, but I try to stick to second-hand cotton and hemp when I can
I bought some cork purses used on Poshmark too
Looks are absolutely related to class and affluence - dental work, cosmetics, clothing, hair care, less stress, etc. So many elements that we associate with being attractive are bought.
HARD disagree about the movie being better than the book thing. I could probably write a book on the subject, but I will just leave it at how much nuance is lost when you aren't able to read (know) the character's thoughts and you can only see their actions, and how leaving out/blending characters and not mentioning motivations for things always makes the story harder to understand but is a very common practice when making adaptations.
It depends on the book and film in question. There are some books that just really do lose something when adapted to film, like what you're talking about. But there are others where the movie may not be the SAME experience as the book, but it's not at all a worse one. And then there are a few film adaptations that I think are actually better than the book. My primary example of this is The Hunger Games. I enjoyed the book, but while reading it, I did have the thought that it read more like an action movie screenplay than the average novel, and when I saw the movie, I did think that it not only translated very well to screen but also that the additions they made actually enhanced the story. It really does just kind of depend on the story in question.
You are right but there are exceptions. Such as Who’s afraid of Virginia Wolf, Suddendly last summer, the Godfather (and Nino Rota’s music), some Stephen King’s adaptions Carrie, Misery, and the Shining, talking about Jack Nicholson Flight over a Cukoo’s Nest, some Ira Levin’s the Stepford Wives, Sliver, Rosemary’s Baby, also by Roman Polansky Tess d’Uberville written by Thomas Hardy, Robert Harris’s Silence of the Lambs, Isaak Dinensen Out of Africa, Babette’s Feast, Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, WM Thackerey’s Vanity Fair and countless others French, Italian and Japanese you may not be familiar with. I think movie adaptions are good/amazing when the cast & director are good/amazing.
timestamps for when I watch on a phone ~
unpopular opinion #1: 0:54
unpopular opinion #2: 6:50
unpopular opinion #3: 12:09
unpopular opinion #4: 13:27
unpopular opinion #5: 16:14
unpopular opinion #6: 18:17
unpopular opinion #7: 22:30
unpopular opinion #8: 25:09
unpopular opinion #9: 27:04
also, loving the outlook on inherited wealth Chelsea!