Experienced Muslim Wives Give MAD Marriage Advice!

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 22 ส.ค. 2024
  • Experienced Muslim wives, married 10+ years, give honest, real, raw advice on maintaining a marriage long term, mistakes they made in their early years and things they wish they had known.
    Covering the standard rights and responsibilities and the more controversial topics of submission, gender roles and how to make your man feel loved, trusted and respected, saddle up for a wild ride!
    If you would like to be better prepared for marriage, consider taking Sr Maryam Lemu’s Premarital Masterclass, an online course that takes an in-depth look at every aspect of preparing for marriage. Suitable for brothers and sisters. Check it out here: www.maryamlemu...
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    Watch the Secrets of Successful Wives conference 🔗: • Secrets of Successful ...
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ความคิดเห็น • 210

  • @user-zu3ot5lo8w
    @user-zu3ot5lo8w 2 ปีที่แล้ว +108

    What a transparent and honest discussion panel. I learned a lot from the experienced sisters. I love that this was Islamic, not feminist.
    This is what we need clear authentic Islamic instructions. Jazakum Allah Khair, Sisters! Ruby, Umm Eesa, Zainad, Sara and of course Na'ima. Keep up the good work!

    • @zainaboladapo
      @zainaboladapo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @تقوى !Thank you ! So Glad it was of benefit to you. Ameen , barakallah feek

    • @sweethealing.ummeesa
      @sweethealing.ummeesa 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      BarakAllahu feekum... The whole conference over the 3 days was filled with immense gems and benefit..alhamdulillah
      All good is from Allah.. Please pray for all of us on the panel.. For our homes to be filled with barakah and goodness, for Allah to protect us from all harm and that He keeps us under His Guidance and Protection.

    • @raheemahanimashaun6951
      @raheemahanimashaun6951 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      L⁹

    • @Muslim_Convert_Stories
      @Muslim_Convert_Stories 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@zainaboladapo FAMOUS FORMER AFRICAN PRIEST REVERT TO ISLAM( AMAZING)
      th-cam.com/video/muWwK-wXdiQ/w-d-xo.html

    • @jeje4042
      @jeje4042 ปีที่แล้ว

      What’s ‘Islamic’ about a woman giving advice without her scarf covering her hair……..it’s no way to be a loving sister when we see haram but ignore it, give no advice and then go as far as encouraging that person to give advice. Though it may be a ‘difficult’ discussion to be had, it needs to be had. The best form of dawah is by example………..

  • @sufus1948
    @sufus1948 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Subhanallah the comment from the sister who said she will not break the home as long as she can worship Allah. What a strong inspirational sister. May Allah SWT ease her troubles

  • @danaadelo1597
    @danaadelo1597 2 ปีที่แล้ว +81

    I am from the West and Christian, I recently marry a Muslim husband, I found this video by the will of God, thank you for your wisdom all the women invited to the panel provided immense wisdom and powerful tools. My heart rejoice with this discussion.
    God bless your work by putting these videos available to everyone
    Thank you. Thank you. Thank you

    • @sadiqdelil5189
      @sadiqdelil5189 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Hi sister, I am a revert from Christianity for 9 years. May Allah guide you to this true and beautiful religion. Have you though about accepting Islam? 😘😘😘💕

    • @seekthetruthandthetruthwil2388
      @seekthetruthandthetruthwil2388 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@sadiqdelil5189 only in Jesus , one has Life eternal.

    • @sadiqdelil5189
      @sadiqdelil5189 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@seekthetruthandthetruthwil2388 Everyone will have an eternal life. The believers of one God and the followers of the prophets of the almighty God will have an eternal life in Jannah where the rivers flow in the beautiful gardens where the best fruit will grow. One will never recall any evil or injustice.
      The ones who associate idols with the almighty will face fire of Jahannam where there will be only regret and eternal punishment. They will eat from zaqqum tree, poisonous and thorny.
      Greetings

    • @seekthetruthandthetruthwil2388
      @seekthetruthandthetruthwil2388 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@sadiqdelil5189 good deeds have no life in itself to help us conquer death, takes life to defeat death. . That’s why Life Himself came to redeem us back to eternal life .
      Allah like Allah religions ( except the Bible) created mankind with death to taste while even the wickedest of man tries to prevent death for his child. God being Life Himself created man for life eternal . Man by eating of the tree brought death into creation and there nothing our good works could do to redeem us back to eternal life

    • @sadiqdelil5189
      @sadiqdelil5189 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@seekthetruthandthetruthwil2388 You can only get to the Jannah by Allah's mercy. The authentic hadith:
      “Follow the right course, be devoted, and give glad tidings. Verily, none of you will enter Paradise by his deeds alone.” They said, “Not even you, O Messenger of Allah?” The Prophet said, “Not even me, unless Allah grants me His mercy. Know that the most beloved deed to Allah is that which is done regularly, even if it is small.”

  • @SaulHeyman1800
    @SaulHeyman1800 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Sister Na'ima, I am a reverting Muslim or prospective revert. At 18 years old, this video is precisely what I needed to hear. I recall you previously were on Mohammed Hijab's podcast and you drew many absurd accusations from many people in the comments. I believe you were superb in your speech and how you conveyed yourself. This video was merely another step further in familiarizing me with what is required of me as a man. May Allah reward Sister Ruby, Eesa, Zainad, Sara, and you Na'ima.

    • @NaimaBRobertTV
      @NaimaBRobertTV  2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      JazakAllahu khairan for your comment!

  • @al-Jakarti
    @al-Jakarti 2 ปีที่แล้ว +129

    You obey your husband, submit to him, or respect him, it's not because you want something back from him or that you want him to feel something. It is just because Allaah commands you to do so, you do it for the sake of Allaah, and expect the reward from Allaah only. Then maybe Allaah will turn your husband's heart into more loving and caring for you, biidhnillaah. Marriage is an ibadah, so make your intention and action only for the sake of Allaah, the rest in sha Allaah will fall into place, by The Grace of Allaah.

    • @majidkhan89
      @majidkhan89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      And advice for husbands to be or are already married, please try and know the rights of your wife. Please try and follow the footsteps of our prophet pbuh on how he held his marriage and how he supported, loved and cared for his wife. Have patience and try and control your emotions. Communicate your emotions in a healthy manner.

    • @pinkteaforfemininity7958
      @pinkteaforfemininity7958 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@majidkhan89 if u don’t like something, leave it and focus on remembering something you do like

    • @majidkhan89
      @majidkhan89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@pinkteaforfemininity7958 absolutely. Try and compromise.

    • @majidkhan89
      @majidkhan89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@ssaa660 your right. Wife also needs to judge what the husband is asking/ordering you to do. If he ask for you to not pray or any sort of haram (sin), then you should say no, regardless of him being abusive or not. If he is being abusive, you have the right to get a divorce as it is important to look after your physical, mental and spiritual wellbeing.

    • @al-Jakarti
      @al-Jakarti 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@ssaa660 I think it's muslim sense to know when I said obey your husband for the sake of Allaah, that means obeying him in every matter that's not against sharia. And ofc there's agreement and compromise between spouses on what they like and don't like, whatever it is. I think every husband and wife know that. I'm here not to tell you the matter in details. You should know the rules, the dos and don'ts, if you follow Qur'an and Sunnah.

  • @ginameyer8832
    @ginameyer8832 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I am newly married and did my shahada last year. I just started watching and I very much enjoy❤️

  • @habiba4518
    @habiba4518 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I could listen to Zainab talk for hours. The way she tells her story and I relate so much with the childhood sexual trauma and bringing that into a marriage. May Allah bless her for sharing such vulnerability.

  • @ummmusa162
    @ummmusa162 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    The ‘we/you should’ really got to me. As a revert married for 15 years alhamduillah- the ‘you should’ has been said to me so much over the years and it is only now, at 38, I feel like I am growing closer to Allah for me and my soul and not because ‘I should’ but because I want it ❤️ jazakAllah for all you do to support and advise. May Allah reward you all for this ameen 🤲🏻 xxx

  • @lulzhh5177
    @lulzhh5177 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I think in the end none of us can be experts on marriage or parenting, like we literally can give the advice but at the same time we are all still learning when it comes to our own life. Marriage and parenting take so much work, and just the actual reality of it is not really like what we learn from books. I studied psychology and read and heard many lectures . But the first hand experience is just not the same. Because we can’t control the other end of the relationship too. I thank all those who came and discussed their experiences so much to get from listening to others for sure. May it be a guidance for all of us. Ameen. Jazzak Allahu khairyn.

  • @royhannahmuhammad-sani6180
    @royhannahmuhammad-sani6180 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    "I came into the marriage being a problem for me" 40mins-43mins ‐ highly profound. Jazakuma Allah khairan

  • @Sh4d0wl3ss
    @Sh4d0wl3ss 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Personal introductions start at 16:00
    Questions start at 20:30

  • @NS-um6yd
    @NS-um6yd ปีที่แล้ว +3

    "You can't have two captins in one boat" - sister Zainab
    Yassss! Masha'Allah sister! This quote is absolute fire! So true!

  • @frogs4733
    @frogs4733 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    JazakAllah Khair for this incredible panel! Especially having a diverse background of women with such different experiences, it really brings to the discussion Alhamdullilah 💕💕

  • @aleenaarif9422
    @aleenaarif9422 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    What they mentioned about masculinity it can be true but it can be the opposite too. Men who are masculine also can like women or are not submissive and have their own voice and take the lead. It's more about mutual respect and love that you have for each other. You can't expect women to just smile pleasingly and nod her head all the time. Its true that you should respect your husband and listen to him when he's right. But your husband can't disrespect you either and many Muslim men belive that they can treat their wife however they like and they are not even to blame.

    • @coolerthetyrant7923
      @coolerthetyrant7923 ปีที่แล้ว

      Now don't talk like those leftover bitter hijabi femanist

  • @Jonokoy
    @Jonokoy 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Subhanallah! You rock, sisters! Thank you so much for this beautiful event, sister Naima! Not only the guests, I loved sister Naima's wisdom, too.

  • @hayaatmullin5338
    @hayaatmullin5338 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    This has come at crucial time for me alhumdulilah, truly needed to hear these words of wisdom SubhanAllah

  • @nikiakbari
    @nikiakbari 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    You have no idea how happy I am that this isn't feminist centric

  • @yvonnehorhager1238
    @yvonnehorhager1238 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Daaamn ruby.. 😂😅 „blaming him for the way i felt“.. that hit too hard.. but seriously, masha Allah tabarak Allah to all of you! And thank you so much for your wisdom and openness ♥️♥️

  • @axis2312
    @axis2312 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Sisters! Masha'Allah, this was hugely beneficial. May Allah reward you all and protect you from evil eye

  • @mushambadauda332
    @mushambadauda332 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    40:00 to 43:00 marriage is like art, youre simply aiming to create a masterpiece.

  • @SCALENE5
    @SCALENE5 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I appreciate your work. May Allah show it to those in need and help them with it. May Allah give all of you and your families Jannah tul Firdous.

    • @zainaboladapo
      @zainaboladapo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thank you. Ameen Ameen wa iyyak.

  • @majidkhan89
    @majidkhan89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Both spouse needs to be spiritually sound. There is a reason why we are told and advised to marry someone who is religious. Because the religious person, whether if its the man or the woman understands the importance of marriage and its responsibilities. Both would love each other for the sake of Allah. Both would realise the blessings in marriage and will work as a team. Both will understand the rewards that comes from helping one another, communicating, supporting and compromising. They will do it selflessly.
    Nowadays there seems to be a list of things people want from their spouse. And these are worldly things. Rather focus on what you want to achieve with your spouse and how both of you can compliment each other to make the road of Jannah easy.

    • @pinkteaforfemininity7958
      @pinkteaforfemininity7958 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      No. Not always. Allah is a turner of the hearts. I just want us to pray regularly and offer tahajud. Along with nawafil fasts. I do have some ‘dunya attacks’ but they seem to have decreased the more I remind myself to pray on time.

    • @umikw3459
      @umikw3459 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Honestly I'm struggling with this...I won't deny... I'm 32 (not very financially stable myself...)and find it hard to accept a 27 year man because to me he seems young and not financially able to take care of a family...he has deen which i admire but I'm also not attracted to him physically. I'm I wrong for not choosing him? Or should I just accept him and hope I lobe him down the road?

    • @majidkhan89
      @majidkhan89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @Ummi Swaleh sister, age is just a number. Though it's important to take other factors in to condition like finances and mutual attractions. I wouldn't worry too much on finances as long as he is trying to earn enough and able to provide for you and the family. Mutual attraction is also important, because if you feel disconnected from the get go, this will cause issues in the long run.
      At the end of the day if you can overlook his finances and attractions, then I would say be ready to commit to the marriage and make the effort to make it work. Don't let the finances or attractions be a later problem. Compromise if that's an issue.
      Also do istikhara as Allah knows best what is good for you.

    • @pinkteaforfemininity7958
      @pinkteaforfemininity7958 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You need to be compatible in worldly sense!

    • @pinkteaforfemininity7958
      @pinkteaforfemininity7958 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@umikw3459 it’s character hun. Deen & character. If he has both, don’t turn him away. If you are pleased with both. That’s the prophetic advise given otherwise there will be fitan.

  • @suherhabib5567
    @suherhabib5567 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    It takes both husband and wife in maintain the marriage it is not only woman. Nowadays dangerously lucking men who can lead be a real man a responsible caring patient not being egotistic all the time. I wish in every comunity there is amarriage course for both men and women it would have solved lots of problems...

  • @sarfraz-ulhaque7022
    @sarfraz-ulhaque7022 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    As'Salaamu-Alaikum Sisters,
    Jazak'Allah-Khair for making and sharing your seminar. Al'humdulillah amazing to listen to your marital experiences, challenges and honesty. As well as communicating the Islamic principles and lessons for Sisters in our Ummah (and hopefully all of humanity) for their personal happiness, betterment and consideration for a successful and blessed marriage. May Allah grant you all success and happiness in this life and in Jannah.

  • @SisterMinnie
    @SisterMinnie 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Masha'Allah my beautiful sisters thank you for sharing this video with us.

  • @ummaliyah6211
    @ummaliyah6211 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is my favorite panels..jzk keyran may Allah reward you please bring the sister back or do part two. I benefited alot from their advice alhamdulillah 🙏. Love your work..currently reading your book 'show up'

  • @sistermuhammad498
    @sistermuhammad498 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    ASA, sisters ! This conversation is such a blessing! I love you all for the sake of Allah swt. Please keep offering these. May Allah reward you all,Aameen.

  • @hafsatyahaya5591
    @hafsatyahaya5591 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Jazakhumullahu khairan to all the panelists. I thoroughly enjoyed this conference. May Allah make it easy for us all to be upright on the deen. Amen!

  • @marmes868
    @marmes868 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    What a blessing that you created the platform

  • @MohammedAli-kg6jp
    @MohammedAli-kg6jp ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Assalamu Alaikum Sister Na'ima from Doha, Qatar, Subhana'Allah it's so realistic discussions of today's era. Can't believe, so many things said, is so relevant, so accurate as if all this conflicts in relationships are occurrence of Shaytan as Rasoolﷺ said, Shaytan gets happy when there is conflict between husband & wife, so as to cripple our Ummah from ever growing and have children's. Subhana'Allah

  • @go2yourself
    @go2yourself ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Really really really great panel and discussion, thank you 🙏

  • @sabihamohsen9101
    @sabihamohsen9101 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    JazakAllah khair for sharing the lost wisdom of marriage. Loved each sister's unique perspective!!

  • @locadiakaskayi537
    @locadiakaskayi537 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    thanks you sister Naima and Zainab you hit a nail on the head when you say submit to our husband after 12 years of marriage I have learnt that man needs to be respected that is the recipe for marriage

  • @purplebear445
    @purplebear445 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I like this discussion. For me the key to successful relationship is communication, self love and understanding each other

  • @thetruthhurts922
    @thetruthhurts922 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is a great preparation for me as a Muslim man to get a insight in the muslim women's minds and needs as we doesn't have any knowledge of all the muslim women's needs and feelings in totally and also the unwanted pieces that can mess up situations and relationships.
    So alhamdulillah it is very beneficial as I take this knowledge with me into my future relationship inshallah and will try to apply the good things and stay away from the bad things inshallah

  • @hajrakhan6396
    @hajrakhan6396 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you amazing insight! Great work sister, please keep bringing more empowering content much needed for us women

  • @ummmusa162
    @ummmusa162 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    SubhanAllah the divorce chat near the end really got me. ❤️🤲🏻❤️ Dunya is so temporary- this talk is so beneficial ❤️

  • @asmajarrar86
    @asmajarrar86 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Masha'a Allah ! may Allah give you all baraka and protect you and your spouses ameen .

  • @GhanemRadhia
    @GhanemRadhia 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    What a lovely talk , mash'Allah. Thank you so much !

  • @fathimaasan4648
    @fathimaasan4648 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Exactly battle with the Nafs is so true
    It’s exactly! True

  • @farzanaarab9242
    @farzanaarab9242 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Jazakallau khairan sisters for keeping it real. We need more of these conversations, alhamduli-allah this is going to help so many insha'Allah.

  • @ghurabaa114xx
    @ghurabaa114xx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    MA Shaa Allah, umm Esa, I relate. This was amazing sisters, may Allah bless u all

  • @usmaniqbal836
    @usmaniqbal836 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    M'shaAllah
    Keep making more of these videos
    Stay balanced brother's and sister's
    May Allah guide us all

  • @AReflectiveSoul
    @AReflectiveSoul 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Please can we have more of this
    I am taking mental notes. I have related to this all so much.

  • @bintbint1316
    @bintbint1316 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Can you do time stamps first

  • @lhs1221
    @lhs1221 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So many things to learn from these wonderful sisters! ❤❤

  • @Dr.JudeAEMasonMD
    @Dr.JudeAEMasonMD 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I can’t tell you how happy I would be to find a brother who wants me home loving him, and he loving me, insha’Allah.

    • @Yunit87
      @Yunit87 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      According to your profile you are not looking for a practicing brother.

    • @halimataminu1423
      @halimataminu1423 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@Yunit87this is a sister forum
      What are you doing here. Can’t a practicing brother be loving

  • @sg9525
    @sg9525 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Finally a sister’s video that isn’t from the feminist lens. JZK

  • @sharunajally5090
    @sharunajally5090 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Ma Sha Allah, learnt alot. Jazaakallahkum kairan

  • @iffatanwar7407
    @iffatanwar7407 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    love seeing Sara here, love ya sis mashaAllaah!!

  • @peacenow6618
    @peacenow6618 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    May Allah Accept your works, and make it a means of acceptance and Guidance for the Ummah!

  • @Pinyo242
    @Pinyo242 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This was so good MashaAllah, jazakillah

  • @nuran5537
    @nuran5537 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I teared up listening to zaineb her story and advice touched my heart. Thank you so much. Also she made me mich at the same time when she brought up naughty dua lmao !!!
    I lover her lot XD

  • @oneldamesi40
    @oneldamesi40 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    MashaAllah all the sister particulary the sister Umm Essa. Such a clever and humble person. She really has such a beautiful islamic thoughts.

  • @esharaali7051
    @esharaali7051 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I kept trying for the sake of Allah. bc many times. My husband says if was not for the KIDS he would leave. I tried counseling it work for a few months then things go back to the same. Old way. I try to get us tovdo things together and as a family but we always end up in disagreement

    • @SalA-es1dt
      @SalA-es1dt 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      May Allah make it easy for u

    • @freespirit7835
      @freespirit7835 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @esharaali, you sound like my wife, just obey your husband, let him lead and you follow him, things will get better inshaallah. I am only staying for my kids. I would leave otherwise. When a woman argues back that is off putting.

  • @hajaraabubakar2657
    @hajaraabubakar2657 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    my name is Hajara Abubakar am from Nigeria minna, this is my first talk

    • @humanist1014
      @humanist1014 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ma shAA ALLAH! I schooled in Minna😊

  • @rahilaosumanu4693
    @rahilaosumanu4693 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Maa shaa Allah,may Allah reward your efforts sisters

  • @SM-il2rr
    @SM-il2rr 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Time stamps please

  • @mara1275
    @mara1275 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    WOW! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!
    💖😭😭😭😭😭🤧😭😭😭😭😭🤧😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🙏😭🙏🤧😭😭🙏😭🙏😭🙏😭🤧🙏🤧🤧🙏🤧🙏🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧🙏🙏🤧🥺🤧

  • @hauwaubello_empoweringthee
    @hauwaubello_empoweringthee 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Lolzzz. The only thing my husband has absolutely stop me from doing too in over 15 years of marriage is piercing my nose too. What a coincidence… well done sisters. Barakalahu fee.

  • @majidkhan89
    @majidkhan89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    1:51:13 so true. Very good advice for sisters

  • @am7470
    @am7470 หลายเดือนก่อน

    .
    Why hasn't anyone addressed the mahr/ مهر?
    Mahr is a mandatory gift that the husband gives to his wife at the wedding. It is a financial arrangement that the groom must make with the bride before the wedding. The amount of money or possessions of the Mahr is paid by the groom to the bride at the time of marriage for her exclusive use.

  • @LaReineM_
    @LaReineM_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Jazzakallahu Khairan Ummi’s For this video being a US born with parents from Africa And Muslim has been very interesting and I learned so much by the will of Allah SWT and realized how much brainwash you could experience by your environment and their perspective of marriage and not how it is supposed to be islamically.

  • @Dr.JudeAEMasonMD
    @Dr.JudeAEMasonMD 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Zhainab is my marriage mentor, in sha’Allah I will finally find my husband. I have no problem submitting to THE brother Allah has for me, period. Full stop. I would love to fall back. My nature is to defer to a good strong man. Now I finally have my value intact and my standards in order to attract him.

  • @zey7576
    @zey7576 23 วันที่ผ่านมา

    1:10:54 I'm experiencing exactly what this sister is describing. I'm quite argumentative, but I'm trying and making dua to improve. I've only been living with my husband for less than two months, so it's challenging.

  • @smasood4398
    @smasood4398 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    As a Muslim woman, submission to your husband means submission to Allah and His command.

    • @humanist1014
      @humanist1014 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      On the condition that he is upon haqq, not abusive nor manipulative, na'am!

  • @Thingsthatmatter3
    @Thingsthatmatter3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    For me someone asking for water at home is someone who is so busy that he cannot get the time out to get his own water

    • @MA-gm3wd
      @MA-gm3wd 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      My dear sister Mariam, you will be more than happy to give him that glass of water InshaAllah. It is courtesy, even work colleagues make coffee for eachother. Your husband is way more than that, your partner in this life and the hereafter and the father of your children InshaAllah.

    • @majidkhan89
      @majidkhan89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@MA-gm3wd agree. Even if you don't like getting water for your husband, if in that moment you think that getting that water will make my husband happy, I will be rewarded for his happiness. Always think about the reward that Allah will give you for a simple act.

    • @veronica5080
      @veronica5080 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      He can get his water lmfaooo

    • @lilacblue783
      @lilacblue783 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Do it for Allah. Do it knowing the reward lies with Allah

    • @nightrider6830
      @nightrider6830 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If you love a man, he doesn't need to ask you for water. Wife asks out of love if he wants water 🙄

  • @marmes868
    @marmes868 ปีที่แล้ว

    My biggest take is that,, understanding yourself and listen to understand not to respond

  • @fathimaasan4648
    @fathimaasan4648 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    The slave of Allah does not question or choose and believes what is ordained by Allah is for her benifit no matter if husband is Useless spendthrift or ect the end result is you reach the target you followed and get your place in Jannah
    The road is difficult but the end is the Aim!!

  • @Afia6098
    @Afia6098 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Communication, communication between to be husband and wife very very important. Most of the time husband is complaining to third person and wife is complaining to her relatives. How can a third person can solve the problem.
    Talk about each other expectations in a nice manner , instead of bringing in the argument. Make time for yourselves. Sometimes Leave your children with relatives or friends and make time for each other. Why both of them cannot have access to bank account. Both of them are responsible budgeting and finances. Women are better savers. So a woman should have own saving acct. ideally if a muslim woman has job , muslim man don’t have access to her income. But guess what both of their retirement income will be needed to survive at the age of 65. The word submissive is used when people used to slaves. There is no concept of submissiveness in marriage. Just like you cannot drive a car with one truck wheel , and the other car wheel. All wheels need to be the same size. It is true that women parties shouldn’t be very late in the evening. But it is okay too to do a get together with friends in a month. But have a different kind of groups morning walking group, book club, volunteer group. But make sure evening all family members are home back before Maghreb. Many men are not talkative and not open . But one has to find some common grounds. Go to masjid together, go for walks together. The traditional role of men in our culture is like ATM machine. But men should be More than that.

  • @priusa8113
    @priusa8113 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    What does obedience to the husband truly mean? It’s a hard concept to grasp for reverts like myself who have been independent since moving out after high school… thank u

    • @Cardboardbox224
      @Cardboardbox224 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Assalamu’alaikum, it means that you obey your husband except if he orders you to disobey Allah. This is one of the duty of the wife. You get rewarded if you fulfill this duty for the sake of Allah. The husband is obligated to treat you well of course and must not be unjust to you. You also need to carefully choose your husband, like ask his mother, sisters about his behaviour, religion, he’s he on the right path, etc. Do istikhara.
      Both husband and wife have right and duties toward each other.
      Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes.”
      Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Ibn Ḥibbān 4163
      Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Arna’ut
      I advise you to learn about the authentic Muslim belief, knowing Allah, tawhid and your purpose in this life makes it more easy for you to obey Allah and can increase your faith.
      th-cam.com/play/PLC6daajq6Qj_LW87J7RYmZiSR4b-ZWNP9.html&si=K5IWr3FrMhNIkjGc

    • @Cardboardbox224
      @Cardboardbox224 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Also before marrying I advise you to learn about your rights and duties as a wife, idk if my previous cop is showing, also these people are not reliable to learn the deen, I send a link to a playlist, you can find other beneficial videos on the their channel

    • @Cardboardbox224
      @Cardboardbox224 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It means that you obey your husband except if he orders you to disobey Allah , of course the husband must be just to you and treat you well as it was ordained in the Quran

    • @Cardboardbox224
      @Cardboardbox224 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Here’s a video about what looking for in a spouse
      th-cam.com/video/EYqR5h_AO7E/w-d-xo.htmlsi=o7lifUtfoINadi5G

    • @Cardboardbox224
      @Cardboardbox224 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Here an explanation of a book that covers basic understanding of the Muslim belief. It can strengthen your faith to learn about it
      th-cam.com/play/PLC6daajq6Qj_LW87J7RYmZiSR4b-ZWNP9.html&si=L12pg9Au1JOHAO_k

  • @thriving_muslim_home_education
    @thriving_muslim_home_education 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Bismillah
    Wa Alaykum As Salaam Wa Rahmatull Allaahi Wa Barakatuhu Dear Beloved Sister Na’ima,
    Al Hamdu Lillaah 🤲🌏🕋
    Allaah All-Mighty’s Final Messenger, our Beloved Prophet Muhammad (Sal Allaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam)!
    May Allaah All-Mighty be pleased with the respected Family, respected Companions of our Beloved Prophet Muhammad (Sal Allaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) and the righteous ones, Allaahumma Aameen!
    Jazak Allaahu Khayran
    Allaahumma Aameen to all the Duas. 🤲

  • @peacenow6618
    @peacenow6618 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jazakallahu Khayran Ahsanul Jaza

  • @Afia6098
    @Afia6098 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    It seems like that women usually have expectations from husbands than Allah .But once a woman puts herself first and start constructing her personality and have trust on Allah that infact only He is the provider and sustainer. This is what is the definition of confidence. Also marriages at young age should be avoided. For muslim women usually it is a reverse cycle. Sometimes young men and women have traumas from childhood. Before one gets married one should spend time in education, employment . Once a person is physically, emotionally and financially stable that’s the time the person is ready to marry. Also, many times when women are coming from other cultures we don’t give confidence to women as to how they will deal with the other gender. Even though once they get married they have to deal with gender. But as one takes time to buy a car or house . Take same amount of time to find the right man or woman. Getting quickly married is not very important , but getting married to the right person is more important.

  • @jocelynburrell3415
    @jocelynburrell3415 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Some may have none of these test just want to share as I waite to find out if my 40 yr Mate Married in 1984 will every come out Hospital our 38 first born just called to tell me a Sis from our kunta connection and 2 or 3 children was in a fire here in Bronx I took care of her Children from A)lab we come to Allah we return so keep those smiles inside as you do the work as The seal of Prophets conveyed best of Ablity wages receive in hereafter I'm looking forward to those drinks that make you untoxicate Insha Allah

  • @islamvsatheistsfeminists9371
    @islamvsatheistsfeminists9371 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jazak Allahu khayr

  • @NIM11a
    @NIM11a ปีที่แล้ว

    I never "wanted" multiple wives. Multiple women have been approaching Me since 3rd grade. My Mother (MIM) told Me I didnt have to devalue one woman to value another. She told Me not to lie. She and My co Mother both had this conversation with Me. My uncle told Me He loved all his wives He just loved them differently for different reasons and sex did not predominate. Thankfully I was never shamed into Judeo Christian guilt and "the main woman" concepts which hides children (ruining their lives), down low homosexual relationships (REAL infidelity), loose sexual morality as long as you "dont get caught" and condones extortion thru mistresses.

  • @darkseid4116
    @darkseid4116 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Amazing ! As a youth I think they're real og among mankind & they are like light while marriage and family is failed in the west

  • @zuleyhalako5970
    @zuleyhalako5970 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    What does that mean to know oneself?

    • @osmanbey8796
      @osmanbey8796 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It means to be self-aware of your flaws so you can learn to control them. The best way to achieve this is to get a diary & start writing about your day, how you behaved, the good & the bad. Especially the bad. Once you know your flaws you can be better. If you don’t know yourself you will pay the consequences in this life & the next, because you’ll keep getting bad results.

    • @zuleyhatassewlako7462
      @zuleyhatassewlako7462 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@osmanbey8796 thank you for the reply.I heard a lot about this word and have been trying to know what it means. I really want to know my self.

  • @chuckboris3844
    @chuckboris3844 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Discussion begins at 13.15

  • @esharaali7051
    @esharaali7051 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I am married for 26 yeats but i feel so lonely from the start. We have 6 kids. Alhamdulilah
    We dont do much together
    Most time we try to communicate we end up disagreeing

    • @pinkteaforfemininity7958
      @pinkteaforfemininity7958 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      These talks are really helpful, though

    • @user-kj7lj2wl5n
      @user-kj7lj2wl5n 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Well its okay to disgaree. But to do it respectfully. And make dua to Allah. Dua is everything. Make Allah make it easy for you. Also try not to look all the negatives in your husband and look at him with a different perspective look at him and understand and respect him he'll respect you. So yeah thats it. but yeah make DUA.

    • @esharaali7051
      @esharaali7051 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@user-kj7lj2wl5n i do make dua all the time Alhamdulilah. He is a good person MashaAllah but if i dont see things his way he really gets annoyed but i wish to spend time with him doing things at least learni g the deen but he said he does not like to leave his comfort zone

    • @user-kj7lj2wl5n
      @user-kj7lj2wl5n 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@esharaali7051 sister elaborate on the comfort zone part?

    • @dreamy665
      @dreamy665 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      He is lazy and not bothered.

  • @yimermekonen2622
    @yimermekonen2622 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Aww as a Muslim role is difficult and it needs strength specially at the age of18 how to control

  • @fathimaasan4648
    @fathimaasan4648 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Balance your Mee time and family
    Both need the time!!

  • @user-eh9ne9yk5d
    @user-eh9ne9yk5d 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    أ كثر من فيديو الترجمة العربية التلقائيةغير متاحة ما السبب

  • @jocelynburrell3415
    @jocelynburrell3415 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Quran and Sunnah

  • @Muslimah1987
    @Muslimah1987 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Errr....about the polygyny woman insisting on holding her family together, does she understand the ripple effect on her children who are watching all this happen? The psychosocial damage this is likely to cause them? Or the ripple effect on the wider community - other men may feel emboldened to make similar destructive choices and their existing wives may feel obliged to stay thanks to the social feedback loop. What can possibly be 'admirable' about such a decision?
    Some worthwhile points from the ladies but these religious/salafist style discourses inevitably turn dysfunctional at some point or another, especially on subjects like marriage.

  • @TheConservativeUmmi
    @TheConservativeUmmi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Happiness comes from the Almighty and not from people

  • @yunyunnoyb1519
    @yunyunnoyb1519 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sentences like:
    "It's not like I need his permission"
    "It's not because I think he will say no"
    Make me feel as though you're trying to make your husband feel like you "submitted" to him and feel like he's in control when deep inside you believe you're the one in control (with kindness or whatever) whilst judging all his actions from some kind of pedestal you built for yourself, approving and desapproving like you were the final authority and trying to navigate him like some ship towards what you "see" as right, it is very manipulative, dishonest, belittling and disrespectful. Fits right in with a woman's nature I guess.

    • @sbk6052
      @sbk6052 ปีที่แล้ว

      you're overthinking this

  • @jocelynburrell3415
    @jocelynburrell3415 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    We Elders first 2 3 so on can some say the promise is true

  • @junaidkarodia4713
    @junaidkarodia4713 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    100 % sister's

  • @idi.h5460
    @idi.h5460 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Acudubillah, God forbid I submit to anyone, but best of luck

  • @user-gd6yr7qj2q
    @user-gd6yr7qj2q ปีที่แล้ว

    Maa shaa Allah

  • @jocelynburrell3415
    @jocelynburrell3415 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Mothers of Insha Believers the Ummah sent to Humanity

  • @BintGumby
    @BintGumby 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    If he orders u around rudely though how do u respond?

  • @SativaSeanLasVegas
    @SativaSeanLasVegas 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    You women make Muslims like myself NOT want to marry anyone remotely like the 4 of you. There is no need for a husband to be accommodating or a dancing monkey for his wife. His purpose is simply to provide and protect 110% at all times, and under all circumstances. That is his requirement to make the marriage work, his Muslima, a peaceful and obedient follower of Allah (swt) helps him by keeping a peaceful home, raising intelligent and loving children with strong values, and insures, the marriage lasts until his death.

  • @marybaroudi8443
    @marybaroudi8443 ปีที่แล้ว

    You don’t call your husband by his name?

  • @aidag4669
    @aidag4669 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I cannot believe sister Zainab just said that naughty dua out loud online 😨
    Just outrageous no haya whatsoever
    Like whaaaat 😰😰😰

    • @thetruthhurts922
      @thetruthhurts922 ปีที่แล้ว

      Agreed it was just to raw wallah I felt disgusted when hearing that but I understand the way she thinks but still it doesn't make it right audubillah

  • @yazm1479
    @yazm1479 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Submission is for Allah alone we don’t submit to another human we are the slaves of Allah there for sumbition is only for him otherwise we wouldn’t have rights from our husbands and can disagree , use our brains , etc

    • @thetruthhurts922
      @thetruthhurts922 ปีที่แล้ว

      Submission as a woman to your husband is the Islamic way and is not some type of worship but an example of how a relationship is syncing in the correct balance but only If the husband is acting according to the islamic teachings and not leading the wife astray. And yes the wife can have a diffrent views of things and different stance and that's natural well not agree on everything. But as a muslim couple build their family upon the Islamic principles then the husband should lead the wife in the role as a husband and the woman as an wife

  • @jocelynburrell3415
    @jocelynburrell3415 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    A S A have not yes listen my piece of Phone so cannot hear those smiles praise be to The Compassionatr may you keep the remembrance inside as well as outside as the Jihad of do you think you will say without being tested

  • @mysterybeauty636
    @mysterybeauty636 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Pleas Be mindful sister with sharing pictures of a sister not covering her awrah correctly. (Thumbnail)