She's trying to guilt you into not paying it back. If she doesn't pay, or won't tell you when she will pay then talk to a lawyer or take her to small claims court. I've lost pets suddenly, and guess what's the first thing you do? You pay the cost, and pay back the people who helped you out. Losing a pet sucks(I cried for months when I lost my Zara), but she is milking it for all it's worth. She made a commitment to pay you back. Hold her to it or you will never see that money again. You aren't being unsympathetic, she is stonewalling you by refusing to even discuss the loan. If she said she needed some time, or could you wait until the new year, that would be fine, but she won't even discuss it? That means she doesn't plan to pay you back ever.
Okay, as someone who borrowed money from a sibling for emergency pet surgery, perhaps wait a bit. (My pet lived.) Express your condolences-a pet loss can indeed be devastating. Re-approach when she’s calmer and hopefully less defensive. Offer for her to repay in installments if she’s strapped. Don’t give her the option of not repaying but let her have some control over how she does so. If none of this works, you’ll know the money was a gift, not a loan. Don’t loan her money in the future and try to move forward to rebuild trust. Is $2500 that you won’t really miss worth a ruined relationship? That’s if this scenario actually happened. 😏
This. OP sounds pretty cold hearted to me. Yes, it was a lot of money. And yes, she agreed to pay it back, in a moment when she was desperate to save her dog. But the vet bills came to $7k. Mom & Op gave4,500, leaving $2,500 for sis to cover. So she probably doesn’t have it. And OP pressing her for it just added to her distress. If OP doesn’t need the money right away, she can pay it back in installments. If he was earning interest on it, he can add that on too. Or if he wants to be a total dick, he can keep acting like he is, treat it as a straight business transaction, pressure her for the $ or castigated her for not paying him back, and ruin a family relationship. Doesn’t sound like he’s ever had a pet that he loved & lost. He might not care much about other people, either.
I think there is no hurry for this. You could clearly wait and have this discussion later down the line. Nobody would have expected to fork out 7 grand... and for the dog to die too. Give her a break. I would still expect the money back, but no right now, you said yourself you didn't need it now.
The OP isn't being unsympathetic. The sister has every right to grieve a lost loved one. However there was a legal agreement to repay by a set date. If the OP doesn't follow up on that they may not have any legal standing if they need to pursue it in court. Further, even if they don't want to take it to a court the longer they wait to just settle it with the sister, the less likely she will be willing or possibly even ABLE to make the repayment. Death sucks. But life is still here and keeps moving on. Little things like this still have to be navigated around your grief.
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Nta. Sister wouldn't have repayed even if the dog lived.
She's trying to guilt you into not paying it back. If she doesn't pay, or won't tell you when she will pay then talk to a lawyer or take her to small claims court. I've lost pets suddenly, and guess what's the first thing you do? You pay the cost, and pay back the people who helped you out. Losing a pet sucks(I cried for months when I lost my Zara), but she is milking it for all it's worth. She made a commitment to pay you back. Hold her to it or you will never see that money again. You aren't being unsympathetic, she is stonewalling you by refusing to even discuss the loan. If she said she needed some time, or could you wait until the new year, that would be fine, but she won't even discuss it? That means she doesn't plan to pay you back ever.
NTA. She never had any intention of repaying you. Give her another month, then sue her.
You should write off the $2500, you will never get them back. The lessons learned is that you should never borrow money within family.
One day sister might need money or some kind of help from op in the future and she won't be trusted enough to pay back
Okay, as someone who borrowed money from a sibling for emergency pet surgery, perhaps wait a bit. (My pet lived.) Express your condolences-a pet loss can indeed be devastating. Re-approach when she’s calmer and hopefully less defensive. Offer for her to repay in installments if she’s strapped. Don’t give her the option of not repaying but let her have some control over how she does so.
If none of this works, you’ll know the money was a gift, not a loan. Don’t loan her money in the future and try to move forward to rebuild trust. Is $2500 that you won’t really miss worth a ruined relationship?
That’s if this scenario actually happened. 😏
This.
OP sounds pretty cold hearted to me.
Yes, it was a lot of money. And yes, she agreed to pay it back, in a moment when she was desperate to save her dog.
But the vet bills came to $7k. Mom & Op gave4,500, leaving $2,500 for sis to cover. So she probably doesn’t have it. And OP pressing her for it just added to her distress.
If OP doesn’t need the money right away, she can pay it back in installments. If he was earning interest on it, he can add that on too. Or if he wants to be a total dick, he can keep acting like he is, treat it as a straight business transaction, pressure her for the $ or castigated her for not paying him back, and ruin a family relationship. Doesn’t sound like he’s ever had a pet that he loved & lost. He might not care much about other people, either.
I think there is no hurry for this. You could clearly wait and have this discussion later down the line. Nobody would have expected to fork out 7 grand... and for the dog to die too. Give her a break. I would still expect the money back, but no right now, you said yourself you didn't need it now.
The OP isn't being unsympathetic. The sister has every right to grieve a lost loved one. However there was a legal agreement to repay by a set date. If the OP doesn't follow up on that they may not have any legal standing if they need to pursue it in court. Further, even if they don't want to take it to a court the longer they wait to just settle it with the sister, the less likely she will be willing or possibly even ABLE to make the repayment.
Death sucks. But life is still here and keeps moving on. Little things like this still have to be navigated around your grief.