@@allintac513 She may not have known what that guy was going to do to her friend and maybe that guy just asked to leave them alone so that they could bond.
Dylan, sorry this happened to you. Know, as many have already noted, you are 100% innocent. Thanks for telling us this painful recollection because your story will help many others.
Dang son, that accent is killer! I'm sorry for your situation and having to go through something as traumatic as this but your a survivor and the best thing is that you have the strength to move forward in your life and put this behind you. Stay strong and know that people out here care about you and love you for the strong man you are!
Dylan, When I was violently raped by the babysitters son I was 4 he 18, some how blocked it from my memory until I was 28 at my mothers just her and I, she brought up the babysitter, somehow I remembered in vivid detail about what happened, I got up and left my mothers home, I couldn't speak for three days. I went to work everyday but couldn't really say anything. I could have let this destroy me but I chose to live, he ended up a detective in a nearby city, and learned I wasn't the only one. I am a fighter and a survivor. Peace be with you, you are not alone. Thank you for bringing this topic up.
I feel sorry for you, that's an awful thing to happen to you. Did you go and beat him up as an adult? I've been sexually assaulted by 2 different men in my life. But I didn't let them rape me. It's not easy to say no!!!! Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I want sex with a man. I'm autistic and I find sex disgusting. I'm still a virgin at 34. There was a boy at my school who "liked animals" too, he was evil!
I use to think I was only physically and mentally abused and neglected, but I was also sexually assaulted by a 50 year old drunk man on the bus, I blocked it out so I had forgot that I was sexually assaulted as well.
I am so sorry this happened to you...But am so glad you are sharing...The stigma surrounding sexual assault, and especially male sexual assault, needs to go away. Have you thought about the very real fact that she may have known what he intended to do. You said you thought "where the fuck is everyone"....maybe she was staying away on purpose. You're better off without her.
One of the hardest lessons for me to learn is that there is such evil in the world. When we are raised to be nice people and taught that "people are basically good," we often underestimate how really evil some people are. Not everyone is basically good. Some are. Some aren't. And some seem to have no conscience at all - and there are far too many of those kinds of people. Psychopaths and sociopaths represent at least 2% of the population, but they are attracted to environments where their evil can be covered up, facilitated, and enhanced. The guy who did that to you, Dylan, was evil and thank God you survived. Your female friend, though, was never a friend.
The female “friend” is a psychopath enabler, one of of the most dangerous types of people out there. A sane and healthy friend would have supported you and encouraged you to press charges.
That is exactly the worst and most confusing part of it all. I balanced my autistic naïveté with spiritual wisdom; in several layers, I know we go through these experiences as a way to learn or reinforce our soul choices. However, there is a layer that I’ve never been able to fully heal; even my body tries to show me that I still bleed in physical (end part of my digestive system) and metaphysical ways. And it has been 10 years… depression of the mind, depression of the body (anemia) and still this huge delta between my agape/unconditional love and certain human choices. Oddly enough, all of this shows me the need to ‘release control’ or surrender, in terms of expecting love reciprocity from my beloved human brothers.
@@xuzeh You are on a journey, my friend - and, believe it or not, you may be a much better person for it. Were it not for your experiences/suffering, what kind of person would you be? Happier, perhaps, but your heart might be colder and you mind darker. This life is rarely a picnic for those who are capable of learning just how tough it can be. When it is over - and that being which is over us all determines the time is appropriate - your suffering in the here and now will be relieved. Which is not to say that you shouldn't seek relief now and make use of the tools available in this life - but surrendering your ego opens many doors and windows.
I'm so sorry for what you went through. It's so sad your friend didn't believe you. In my opinion she was never the friend you thought she was. I hope you get help for this. I'm 53 and still need help with coping for what happened as a child. You are a kind soul and deserve all the best ❤. By the way, you could never look disgusting even after a hard days work. You're pretty darn cute. Your bf is a lucky man.
@declankelly9829 saying that is as disgusting and reprehensible as telling a female sexual assault survivor that if she had not worn that dress or perfume or those red shoes she would not have been raped. You obviously have NO clue the level of trauma here. May you never be drugged and taken advantage of while unable to defend yourself. But Karma is a bitch!!
But Dodger, if something is true why might it not be said. Something can always be learned from the truth. It is good for this man to know that he was assaulted because of his looks. He will now be more careful what kind of parties he goes to and who he takes drinks from. He will know that there are people out there who desire him only for his body and who will do anything to get it. That's a powerful lesson to learn in life! @@dodger712
I was dosed, raped and robbed years ago, and because I'm a guy and promiscuous and gay and would have probably slept with the guy anyway, it took me 15 years to even admit I was raped(even though I was literally trying to flee the bar and get away from him because I was creeped out and feeling off when he caught up with me). Serious loss of power. Very sad and hard to deal with. Thanks for sharing.
Consent is consent. No means no. In the U.K. the law has only just changed to include those under the influence of drink or drugs can’t give consent. In the past date rape was ‘blame the victim’ time. It’s a bit better here now but it still happens. I sympathise with you.
@@Ramzbloodwhy can't we fight to change that. Men and women. I have so many male friends with so much deep seeded trauma that they can't talk about to the normal population and that needs to stop
@@RamzbloodThat is not true. Millions of us care but we can't be everywhere nor can we help everybody. Look at all of the people 's comments wishing him well and telling him that they respect and love him. We do care. Hopefully life gets better and better for him.
Hey Dylan I truly get your pain. I was raped by my 15 year old cousin while he was babysitting me... I was 4 or 5. My Mom took my grandmother grocery shopping. As soon as the car drove away he was carrying me on his shoulders up to my bedroom. He put himself in me and it seemed like 15 minutes. It hurt bad. My Mom was gone for maybe 45 minutes. She pulled the car in and I got dressed quick and went running. I was halfway down the stairs and he yelled if you tell anyone about this your going to get in big trouble. I ran out and got in the car. We dropped my grandmother off and I sat my parents down and tried explaining what happened. My father never really cared about me so he didn't say anything. My Mom said his grandmother was so sick with heart issues if this came out it would have killed her. So nothing was ever done to him. He was sooooo pervy he tried raping his own sister. ... Very evil person. I'm sorry that assault happened to you and it wasn't your fault. And as far as that friend goes she wasn't a true friend. You can find better than her. Blessings & love my friend.
Dylan, thank you for sharing your story and I do understand what you're going through. I was leaving a bar in Cambridge, Mass. when I was accosted, knocked out and driven to an abandoned apartment where the actual assault took place through the night, to be left there by sunrise. I did not know who he was and the police really never ,made any serious attempt to investigate. I do not want to make this graphic, but even being seriously injured, the police more or less shrugged it off as soon as they heard I had been leaving a bar when it happened. (I was not drunk, but tell them that). I was 21 years old then and the 21st year mark is soon coming on Nov. 1st. I dread it every year and even after 20 odd years I still have the occasional dream, nightmare. But life does get better, and one thing I learned, and it took me a while is you didn't do anything wrong. I had never imagined, ever, something like that could happen to me, as you also said. It is not part of men's lives, so we are taught. That took a long time to sort out. Thank you for sharing as doing this does provide a lot to those of us who need the support. I hope you're doing well now, wish you the best
My ex got raped by a guy he thought was helping him after he was knocked out in a bar. It took over, became a hatred for gay people, and do this day has never gotten past it! It can change you as a person, and I’m glad you are not letting this be the future for you. Don’t punish yourself for another’s sin!
I found your Coming Out video recently and am now following you. Really enjoy your authentic style of storytelling, so vivid and clear. I'm so glad that you have a calling to help others because I can really feel your golden heart.
Your story compelled me to say this to you. You are a brave, intelligent, kind, and loving man who survived a horrific event. You are a true man for having the courage to survive and help others. You could not defend yourself as a man because you were taken advantage of and drugged. There is nothing you could have done differently because that mobster took away your abilities to defend yourself. You are in my prayers that you are ok physically and emotionally. Thank you for sharing your story. We have a lot in common. Nice to know there are survivors out there and we are not alone. ❤
And don’t feel bad about being roofied. That was not your fault and I can understand why you didn’t want to press charges, even though I wish you had for your sake, but it’s not your fault not your fault at all you need to believe that.
Dylan I am sorry. I really am. It takes a lot to overcome this crisis and take your life back. You are right about the police not doing anything to assist. The impact is deep. That is the part people do not understand. The scar and hurt will always run deep. Someone will be helped by you sharing this experience in your life.
You ARE one tough cookie. But you were DRUGGED, you were traumatized, you were in shock-that’s what predators know how to do to their victims. And your friend-as others have commented-she was NOT a friend. SHAME ON HER. And you weren’t rambling. You spoke fine. Young man, you’re a hero, a survivor, and you are beyond strong. I’m proud of you. Very proud. Sending you blessings.
Drugging someone is not a fair fight and It took an incredibly strong man to talk about that horrific experience the way you just did. You have one powerful soul.
What a terrible situation. I'm so sorry you went through that. I was drugged at a party and almost raped but my best friend interrupted the guy and got me out of there. P.S. You are such a handsome guy and you sound like a beautiful person. I could listen to you talk all day..hehe...your accent is so cute. I'm from CA and so I dont hear guys who talk like you. Big Hugs to you!!
I’m a woman and I’ve been through the same thing. I felt the same way after it happened. I blamed myself. I thought I should not have been there. What did I do wrong? I didn’t press charges for the same reason. I didn’t want to relive it. Finally I realized there was nothing I could do and I survived. I was overpowered by a man much larger and stronger and I cried and kept saying no. I told a few people and got no support. It’s a horrible thing to go through. I’m so sorry it happened to you. You can’t blame yourself and be thankful you survived and can tell your story. It is one many share and understand. ❤
Thank you for sharing a very personal story. It takes a lot of courage to admit to this kind of experience. I'm sure many will be able to identify they too felt ashamed but, this was not your fault, and you were not able to defend yourself. Healing does take time more of the mind than the body. I hope, and am sure your life will improve over time as the healing takes effect. God bless.
Thank you for sharing your story. You are on the road to healing. You are not to blame for what happened. These people are not your friends. Please know that you have many people who support you. I am here for you.
Dylan, thank you so much for sharing your story. Being a survivor myself, I know how difficult it can be to put blame on yourself or beat yourself up, but you did absolutely nothing wrong. You're so brave for sharing your story. The more of us who share, the more awareness there will be and hopefully will help someone in the process. My heart is with you, brother. 💖
You explained perfectly why so many women that have had the same thing happen to them don't always report it. Just remember it was nothing you did, the blame is all on the other guy. If nothing else you learned from it, too bad he won't be held accountable but if this is a pattern with him maybe he will at some point
Dylan, I’m very sorry to hear your story, mainly because it mirrors my life experience almost exactly. I can understand how that makes you feel incredibly guilty right afterwards because you are constantly questioning what did YOU do to make something like this happen. You go through the, “if only I had done this…” or “if only I had done that”. But the bottom line is, you did nothing wrong. You were assaulted, period. This happened to me in my early 20s, and I am now 64 years old. It gets better. I had therapy and I’ve been able to move past the experience and can now look back on it as something sad, but the rage and anger is gone. I’ve had a very successful life with very meaningful relationships so I know personally, that it does get better. You will heal and the negative feelings you may have about yourself will go away. Hopefully they have already gone away for you. But please, never ever question yourself. It was not your fault and you could not have done anything differently to change the outcome. I am happy that you can speak of the experience and are willing to reach out to help others that have experienced something similar. You are a good person.
What a beautiful post Rick. So comforting, so consoling and uplifting. I thank you for sharing as I’m sure Daniel is as well. Love and peace, Gord in Winnipeg Canada.
You are a valuable Man! Always remember that you were drugged your control over the situation was stolen from you . This would never have happened to you if it was a fair fight. Remember that when ever you have a nightmare. Stay strong ❤️⭐️💪👍💜💙🏳️🌈🇺🇸🍀🌈
I admire your courage. I had a situation that didn't progress as far, and I am a big dude, but I took a lot longer to learn how to stand up for myself. Your strength is amazing and it's wonderful to see
Hey Dylam mate. TH-cam decided to bring this up on my feed, so my first time watching you. Firstly, NONE of what you went through was your fault nor did you ask for, NONE of it! As someone who has been going through severe gastric distress for 9 months shy of a decade now which sees me have to be super careful what I ingest the thought of someone having their food or drink spiked makes me feel a lot of anger as what we ingest is so personal. And of course any drug that might be okay for someone could kill someone else, and you handsome man were clearly drugged, so a double assault if you will. Lucky you got out of that alive on multiple levels. Btw, as an Englishman (London) my favourite American accent is from the South, just love it! 😊 I could listen to you recite the phone book, haha. I would genuinely love to meet you one day, you have such a lovely warm presence. Having just written the above I just read the description to your channel here, and love what you say about; ''heal your life through self-love''.... Absolutely! What I am doing but on a physical level, although the last 9+ years (the last 3.5 years especially) has been very much a spiritual journey too as I evolve. Big hugs to you lovely man, and thank you for sharing.
Dude, that was a tough video to make. And you did it so well. You are a great man for speaking out about it. Discussing what happened to you, helps to heal others that don't say anything. As well, I have found that as tough as it is to do, the repeated disclosure will heal you even more. i built a new app to provide people, when meeting online, to be able to rate a situation anonymously, post-engagement, Once a user builds up a great composite rating, then that user can share that they are good people. Now, that pos person who assaulted you, would probably not be on my app, and that refusal to have a composite rating to share, that in itself would help someone in deciding to being their friend in the first place. Just saying, that as you plan on helping others with your videos, for me it was building the app that has helped me to heal as well. It gets better bro, but its a trigger that won't go away but you get better at handling the response to the triggers when they come about and you become able to guide your reactions. You should be proud of yourself.
sadly this is a common thing , it happened to me when I was 17 & now I'm 53 & I still can't think about it with out great anxiety . All I can think is he could have killed me I feel / felt disgusting . That women was not your friend
Women as sexual predators. I just wanted to say something on this topic I have had experiences of being groped and sexually assaulted a few times and nothing like the experience you have had but all of the perpetrators in my case have been women. E.g. I was only 26 and I had to get my female colleagues at work to walk in front of me and behind me whenever I went near the lunchroom to avoid a particular woman groping me or pinching my ass. I had an ex boss try kissing me tongue down the throat and grope me at a Christmas party in front of my partner. She claimed she was going to turn me straight coz I just hadn't met the right woman. I can't wear my uniform especially at nights out in London e.g. for the trooping of the colour because of women mostly drunk trying to lift my kilt. I was in a bar and nearly stepped on a woman's face she was lying on the floor trying to take a picture under my kilt. I get so sick of it women have a right to be treated with dignity and respect by men always but they also have an obligation to do the same to men. If I went around lifting womens dresses or trying to take pics underneath I would be arrested in minutes. Women seem to think that because you are a man A. you are gonna enjoy that sort of disgusting attention from women B. That is just a bit of harmless fun. Neither is true and sadly I can attest that women are not always the victims of sexual abuse in my case they have always been the perpetrators.
@@edwinholcombe2741 I too, experienced the groping & pinching from 2 females when I was in high school. You are told as a young man that you A want it & B like it.....hello...are you speaking for me? Instead of "turning me straight"....I was a blank slate of sexuality during my teens & this bad touching turned me off women for like over a decade...I didn't go to my junior & senior prom....I didn't have a single "romantic girlfriend" all the way through my first 4 college years. I didn't have a "romantic girlfriend" until around age 28 in 2002....she was unlike all these disgusting perpetrating females. So there's my story where I can relate to your experiences. I am not ruling out the possibility, but at 49, I have never been married & am highly unlikely to have a female romantic partner again.
THANKS FOR SHARING BUDDY. I went through something when I was 10 with the neighbor next door. I didn't have a say in what got done about things at all. My dad blamed me for what happened and would not let the police prosecute the guy next door. He was 18 and a lot bigger than me. I was forced to go into therapy for months and the doctor continually made me relive it every time I visited. That year was one of the worst of my life and I still deal with it.
While I appreciate that therapy can be important and cathartic, people consistently fail to realize that part of the therapeutic process is reliving the trauma. And if a therapist is impatient, or inept then they can do more harm then good.
I’m also a gay man, and I just have to say, I kind of hate your ‘best friend’ as much as the guy that roofied you. Your best friend is supposed your safe port in any storm! The fact that she didn’t believe you at all is so shocking, and honestly, evil. Had she believed you, I think getting through it would have been easier, you might have been able to go to the police, maybe stop him from doing this to someone else, etc. i hope you can tell her that someday. (I just had a really DARK thought! What if she conspired with the rapist to let this happen to you, throwing the party, conveniently leaving with everyone else, him having the roofie ready and knowing he’d have the opportunity, her keeping everyone away for so long. Like what the fuck?!). Maybe don’t have ANY contact with her!
I survived institutional sexual abuse in a group home for 5 years. This is something that will never leave you but if you become good at channeling the emotions this causes you will find yourself in a position where when you think about it you dont have a pannic attack or get angry and take it out on the worng people. It has been a life long struggle for me. But know you are not alone, what happened was not your fault in any way. Therapy is necessary. Trauma specialist. Do it. I promise it will help you. Most insurance covers it now.
Dylan thanks for having the courage to share that horrendous experience. It has given me the courage to face my experiences in a more positive light. Again thanks and praying that your memory is healed. You are one amazing person.
So sorry this happened to you. Kudos for sharing this, raising awareness, and maybe even helping someone else. I was *nearly* raped decades ago, but I had not been drugged like you and was able to fight him off. I dreamt about it for a while after, but thankfully those faded years ago. *I* belive you, bud. Hugs.
god bless you! I"m sorry you had to go through that. there are so many of us that share a similar story/experience and dont or cant talk about it. much love to you for sharing your story
I had a very similar experience to you Dylan. At first it was so difficult to face and the worst was facing my family and friends and telling them. It takes time to get over the guilt and embarrassment..but it will happen. The positive side is it makes you so much more critical of your decisions and to trust your instincts. Good luck my man..Marcus❤
I'm very proud of you sharing your trauma experience.. I know what you been thru.. I was sexually assault when I was young it was quite traumatizing experience.. You aren't alone on that.. It was not your fault & you did nothing wrong. You were drugged & wasn't able to defend yourself thru trauma process.. Don't blame yourself for it.. Even tho you drank wine it is not consider cheating or anything.. You did not cheat on your ex.. I'm glad you have recovered from your trauma experience and it made you stronger person.. As for your former lifelong friend she was not true friend.. True friends would stand besides you & support you but she choose not to. That is sad its painful to lose her but she showed her true side.. Now just be extra cautious who you trust & develop friendship with.. Remember you are good person & with good heart.. I can tell by watched your videos you are amazing man.. You are not alone & you got me as your support & good listener.. I'll keep watching your videos & enjoying them.. I really enjoying watching your videos.. 😊
My deepest apologies to you for this horrible experience. I was abused as a child by a sick stepfather and I grew up with unrelenting guilt. Fortunately, I found an awesome therapist to help me work through the feelings. I wish you the very best and you’re so brave for sharing such a traumatic experience!
I had a very similar thing happen when I was 28 and just came out. At that time I was drinking and partying every other weekend, so I could handle my alcohol. I went to a party and the home owner gave me the creeps right from the start when he reached inside my shirt and started playing with my chest hair and making comments on it. That night i had only two drinks that were brought to me by that person and I could not move, I was out of it, so he and one other dragged me to a bedroom where I thought I could recover. How long later I do not know, he had forced himself on me and I was a little more awake but all I could do was cry and repeat no, stop over and over. I now know from others that this is his routine , and does that to many guys. If I see him again I will be going to jail for deleting him.
….people don’t believe things like this until it happens to you. The sad thing is MOST men have NO ONE to talk to (i.e. family or friends) about the assault and life HAS to go on for us who are abused and we have to bury it inside of us! Plus, you are LABELED less than a man if it happens to you and that is sad!
Dylan, you are such a sweet, young man. And you are absolutely gorgeous. None of what happened was your fault in the slightest! HE DRUGGED YOU, how could that possibly be your fault! I am so sorry that happened to you! You didn’t deserve to have that happen to you! And it is incredible that you made this video to help others! YOU ARE AMAZING!
Thank you for your honesty and telling your story. I’m a survivor, too. I was aged 5 - 7 years old at the time. It was 1959 - 1961. My perpetrator was our neighbor, a married guy with two teenage kids. I was groomed and lured until he could spring his trap. I never told anyone until 2013 when I began therapy. We live with the trauma and the awful truth all of our lives. Every day.
I’m sorry for what you went through. I was molested when I a child then joined the military to get away from the abuse only to suffer more from several fellow soldiers. I had no one to talk to for years. Tried reporting all of it and had a hard time finding someone to listen to me and believe me. Finally years later with the help of therapy I’m able to cope.
Thank you for being brave and putting this out there. I’ve been through this at a party that devolved into an orgy around me passed out on the couch and people took my lack of response through coming in and out as a tacit approval. I’m not friends with that group anymore.
What an awful thing to happen! I can’t imagine! So sorry this happened to you 😢. I have a friend, a male, that was made intoxicated by a female friend who took advantage of him. The sad part is nobody believed him, except me. I told him, why would he say something like that if it weren’t true. He felt emasculated. There would be no reason whatsoever for him to reveal something so personal and humiliating.
So sad that you went through all this! But I'm happy that you have shared your story and that you have found a path forward. Much love and big hugs to you!
Prayers Dylan, nobody deserves this done to them . I’m so glad you put this out there because you hear a lot about women going through this but not men. Some one like yourself is going to see this same thing and might help them too . 🙏🏼 ❤
Don't be hard on yourself that you were unable to stop it. He knew what he needed to do to have you in that vulnerable state. Reflect on the thought that you were a victim at the time, but you're a survivor now.
Remember...that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger...he was the coward weakling who had to drug you to force you. You are a hero for sharing your experience
Terrible. Evil stuff. Young people gotta stop thinking that drinking and drugging is “fun” in most social circles have snakes lurking around and this is why. Poor guy, glad he survived and telling your story is a powerful thing
Saludos desde México. I'm new to your channel, but I know exactly how you felt. I'm an old old man now, but I was raped twice when I was a young man. Like you I used to be very slender and really short to boot. I'm 5ft 4 inches tall. I got gang raped the first time and the second time was kind of like what happened to you. I was drugged and woke up with a massive guy on top of if me. I felt so emasculated, and the eating disorders followed. Don't beat yourself up for it, it wasn't your fault, but I'm 68 years old and certain things trigger and remind me of those horrible experiences. I'm going right back to the beginning and subscribe. You are an amazing story teller and a lovely person.
I’ve been in that exact situation too. I feel your pain. I am grateful you shared your experience. I hope that I can too one day. Like you I am grateful for the lessons that I have been able to take from it and finally being able to take back power over my life, and denying that person the power they perceived to have. I wish you well Dylan! Cheers, -Dylan L.
If the one person you trust as your best friend doesn't believe you, how can anyone expect you to tell what happened to police? So many times, the blame gets put on the victim. In the worst of times, you find out who are truly your friends. I don't blame you for not wanting to tell anyone or report it. I can imagine how embarrassing you would feel having to tell it to strangers, go to court, have all your family watch you relive what you went through when you testified. But this will make you stronger in the long run. Now anyone you get creepy vibes from someone you will never accept a drink from them. Sharing this story proves you have moved on and didn't let it be what defines you and you took the experience as something to help and warn others. Sounds like you do have someone in your life now that respects and understands you. Thanks for sharing, and keep up your good nature bro!
Dylan, thank you for sharing your story of what happened to you and how it affected your self esteem. I am glad you are making videos and speaking out. No one should have to endure assault of any kind from anyone. In 2010, I left a long term relationship with a man that had verbally abused me throughout the relationship. He never physically hurt me, but he tore down my self esteem. I left him and had to take out a restraining order so he could never come near me. He lives in a different coast than I do. I trust that I will never set eyes on him. I wish you the best. I am sorry the woman friend did not believe you. She should have supported you and been a true friend.
As you were telling the events that unfolded in your story, I could not help but be so angry and upset over what this man did to you and the aftermath of it as well as losing a good friend who made the circumstances that much worst. Shame on the both of them. You took great courage telling this story and using this as a platform to let others know who dealt with this situation that you're willing to be a voice for them and help them through it as well. I am curious to your next videos to how you mentally healed through this experience as im sure it was no walk in the park. All the best Dylan!
Thank you very much for relating and sharing your experience. And please believe me when I say that you didn't ramble on about it. Not even in the slightest. And it's not your fault. What you're doing, especially here in this video, is very important and I'm glad I discovered your channel to learn about your strength and resilience. Hope you keep doing the good work that you're doing and stay strong in the process:)
Dylan what happened to you was not your fault I hope that by telling your story it will help other sexual assault victims you are brave for speaking about your assault I understand why you didn't go to the police
I want to thank you for sharing such a dramatic story. I hope you're doing much better now. It seems like you are doing much better. I am a mental health professional and a college professor. I would love to use your story in some of my classes.
The way you cope with this evil incident says you have a brave and beautiful mine. I have nothing but admiration for you. I am glad that you got it all out on the camera. It is important for victims to be able to do that, to process it all. But if you think at any time you still have PTSD, do not be afraid to ask for professional help. Always remember: you don’t have to fight this alone. You are not alone! Sending all the love and good wishes 🙏
I'm so sorry that happened to you! I hope you have found the strength to get the therapy you need to deal with this and its after-effects. I'm also sorry about the loss of your friend. I too was sexually assaulted once and never told anyone about it for many years. I hope you get closure and justice and peace.
Oh Dylan no, NONE of this was your fault. I'm amazed that you could tell the story and be calm about it. That shows that you have done a lot of emotional work and I'm sure it was one of the most painful psychological events you have experienced. He drugged you and from you say, he raped you. He knew exactly what he was doing. I am SO glad nothing happened to your physical health. As I was listening I was wondering "oh god PLEASE don't let this other guy "finish" with no protection. I can't imagine what you went through. Sharing this story took a lot of courage. Hugs my friend.
You've done an amazing job articulating the details of your experience and feelings. That's something to be proud of. Imagine all the people that have been helped by your sharing.
I am so sorry this happened to you. No one deserves to be abused. I will say I find it suspicious that that guy was invited to your going away party, and that your friend conveniently went to the store just after you were given that drink. But whether she was in it or not, it’s enough that she didn’t believe you. Glad that you ended that friendship. She was not your real friend.
You're a very brave man. I suggest that you file a police report on the guy. With sexual assault many states have lifted the statute of limitations so in the state in which this happened. In LA there is no statute of limitations.
Dylan, SO very sorry this occured to you 😢. SO sorry you lost your female best friend over believing that your mutual male friend would do this to you!!! Please understand that this was NOT your doing!!!! It happened to you, you did NOT ask for this to happen to you!!! (For everyone to be gone as long as they were, I have to wonder did your female best friend and ya'll's mutual friend in cahoots???) You did NOT cheat on your boyfriend!!!! I Love your stories and events from your life. Thank you for sharing your life with us. Dylan, if you ever find yourself single again, I would LOVE to be your boyfriend/future husband.
being drugged incapacitates you, so you cannot defend/protect yourself! the shame is on the one who drugged you. how can you give consent when you are blacked out? the worst is when people do not believe you. and post traumatic stress is difficult. i hope you learn to love yourself for surviving this.
Thanks for your bravery in speaking up. It happened to me in the 90s before there was effective treatment for HIV. I was so terrified for weeks because it took a long time to show up in tests. There was no way I was going to the police because he was a sheriff’s deputy. Who are they going to believe- little gay guy or their “popular guy” coworker? I found out through a friend who stayed in that town that he got caught and fired from the police force, but of course he wasn’t charged. Why do these guys keep getting away with it? It really had a very negative effect on my life and mental health. I tried to get help, but I kept running into the situation where the counselor / psychologist said they don’t specialize in it, but all the special services were for women only. I think the first step to getting services set up for men in all regions is awareness thanks to people like you who have the courage to talk publicly about their experiences, so thank you and I hope you’re doing okay. 🤗
Dylan, sorry for what you went through. You did a brave thing by coming forward and sharing your story. It’s a stark reminder that anyone can be the victim of sexual assault and that it has a profound and lasting impact on people’s lives. Hope this message finds you well and that you continue to heal. Be well.
Dylan, you have a very kind heart, no arrogance, no hatred. You are a very loveable person. Good wishes for you. Please always take good care of yourself. I can feel your sincerity.
You're a brave man to get this out there and openly talk about it, especially now with all the hate going on. You're strong, you did nothing wrong. There was nothing you could do to defend yourself, you were drugged. Again, you are very brave. More power to you, man, and keep up the good work !
I skipped school age 15 to see a blue movie in a cinema. I was roped there but it was so dark that I couldn't identify the rapist who fled. I just had to carry on as if nothing had happened.
No body realizes how often this happens, and when you’re a gay male the devastating thing is we blame ourselves, no one believes you, no one wants to talk about it. And effects every part of you for the rest of your life. I like you was very good looking and always wondered if I gave off the wrong idea or said something that would make people come after me all the time . Now I’m much older and look at my younger pictures and realize how beautiful and handsome I was . People would later go on to tell me they thought I was out of their league and honestly I had no idea . But I was attacked several times in the late 70s and badly beaten in the mid 80s and i still vividly remember every time. My heart goes out to you and anyone else who reads this and understands. It now seems very far away and it was a different place and time , but seek out thearpy it helped a lot just don’t relive it all .
123rd as a Gay Boomer.....I was sexually assaulted / raped at 16 ....this happened in 1976 ......I had severe stomach pains / diareaha and bleeding....for a day or 2 ..... I never told anyone ...and blamed myself for putting myself in a bad situation.....plus it was 1976...who was I gonna tell? There were no REAL Good influences on TV....no social Media.... now at 63 married to hubby..together 23yrs... it's a long distant memory..... I envy young people today for having More Avenues of HELP and examples of a Positive Life to Live as a young LGBTQ person
Dylan: I know this happened quite a while ago but I just came across your story. I'm very sorry this happened to you. Whatever you do, don't ever blame yourself for anything that happened. You were just at the wrong place at the wrong time. After all, you didn't drug yourself! The cold truth is that you were raped and in a perfect world, the rapist would be arrested, prosecuted, and punished. I know another man that this exact same thing happened to. He did try to go after the man who did this to him but, unfortunately, discovered it is very difficult for one man to prove that he was raped by another man. It's difficult enough for a woman to prove that she was raped and that's why so many rapes go unreported. Anyway, I just felt the need to tell you not to blame yourself or feel guilty about what happened. Take good care and God bless. DE
Dylan, you DIDN'T lose a good friend; her behavior proved that she was an awful friend.
YES
Exactly.
I think she was in on it. She left alone. That's way to convenient.
@@allintac513 She may not have known what that guy was going to do to her friend and maybe that guy just asked to leave them alone so that they could bond.
Anyone who has the courage to speak openly about that gets both my respect and a subscription 👍🏻
Trust me honey. You did NOT lose a good friend, she was never a good friend, just an acquaintance. Good riddens to bad rubbish!!
so true
Good RIDDANCE.
@@efandmk3382 yes exactly ...
You are 💯% correct!
Honey damn 😜 LoL
Dylan, sorry this happened to you. Know, as many have already noted, you are 100% innocent. Thanks for telling us
this painful recollection because your story will help many others.
Dang son, that accent is killer! I'm sorry for your situation and having to go through something as traumatic as this but your a survivor and the best thing is that you have the strength to move forward in your life and put this behind you. Stay strong and know that people out here care about you and love you for the strong man you are!
Dylan, When I was violently raped by the babysitters son I was 4 he 18, some how blocked it from my memory until I was 28 at my mothers just her and I, she brought up the babysitter, somehow I remembered in vivid detail about what happened, I got up and left my mothers home, I couldn't speak for three days. I went to work everyday but couldn't really say anything. I could have let this destroy me but I chose to live, he ended up a detective in a nearby city, and learned I wasn't the only one. I am a fighter and a survivor. Peace be with you, you are not alone. Thank you for bringing this topic up.
I feel sorry for you, that's an awful thing to happen to you. Did you go and beat him up as an adult? I've been sexually assaulted by 2 different men in my life. But I didn't let them rape me. It's not easy to say no!!!! Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I want sex with a man. I'm autistic and I find sex disgusting. I'm still a virgin at 34. There was a boy at my school who "liked animals" too, he was evil!
Fantasy
Seems odd no one would no a 4 year old was raped. Your parents let you down. This is awful.
I use to think I was only physically and mentally abused and neglected, but I was also sexually assaulted by a 50 year old drunk man on the bus, I blocked it out so I had forgot that I was sexually assaulted as well.
Sweetie, I'm so sorry you had to endure this evil😢
I am so sorry this happened to you...But am so glad you are sharing...The stigma surrounding sexual assault, and especially male sexual assault, needs to go away.
Have you thought about the very real fact that she may have known what he intended to do. You said you thought "where the fuck is everyone"....maybe she was staying away on purpose. You're better off without her.
One of the hardest lessons for me to learn is that there is such evil in the world. When we are raised to be nice people and taught that "people are basically good," we often underestimate how really evil some people are. Not everyone is basically good. Some are. Some aren't. And some seem to have no conscience at all - and there are far too many of those kinds of people. Psychopaths and sociopaths represent at least 2% of the population, but they are attracted to environments where their evil can be covered up, facilitated, and enhanced. The guy who did that to you, Dylan, was evil and thank God you survived. Your female friend, though, was never a friend.
NO CONSCIENCE---the universal trait of psychopaths.
The female “friend” is a psychopath enabler, one of of the most dangerous types of people out there. A sane and healthy friend would have supported you and encouraged you to press charges.
That is exactly the worst and most confusing part of it all. I balanced my autistic naïveté with spiritual wisdom; in several layers, I know we go through these experiences as a way to learn or reinforce our soul choices.
However, there is a layer that I’ve never been able to fully heal; even my body tries to show me that I still bleed in physical (end part of my digestive system) and metaphysical ways. And it has been 10 years… depression of the mind, depression of the body (anemia) and still this huge delta between my agape/unconditional love and certain human choices.
Oddly enough, all of this shows me the need to ‘release control’ or surrender, in terms of expecting love reciprocity from my beloved human brothers.
@@xuzeh You are on a journey, my friend - and, believe it or not, you may be a much better person for it. Were it not for your experiences/suffering, what kind of person would you be? Happier, perhaps, but your heart might be colder and you mind darker.
This life is rarely a picnic for those who are capable of learning just how tough it can be. When it is over - and that being which is over us all determines the time is appropriate - your suffering in the here and now will be relieved. Which is not to say that you shouldn't seek relief now and make use of the tools available in this life - but surrendering your ego opens many doors and windows.
I'm so sorry for what you went through. It's so sad your friend didn't believe you. In my opinion she was never the friend you thought she was. I hope you get help for this. I'm 53 and still need help with coping for what happened as a child. You are a kind soul and deserve all the best ❤. By the way, you could never look disgusting even after a hard days work. You're pretty darn cute. Your bf is a lucky man.
Being cute is why you were targeted.
@declankelly9829 saying that is as disgusting and reprehensible as telling a female sexual assault survivor that if she had not worn that dress or perfume or those red shoes she would not have been raped. You obviously have NO clue the level of trauma here. May you never be drugged and taken advantage of while unable to defend yourself. But Karma is a bitch!!
@@declankelly9829 That's really messed up to say that. It put something slimey on what I said.
But Dodger, if something is true why might it not be said. Something can always be learned from the truth. It is good for this man to know that he was assaulted because of his looks. He will now be more careful what kind of parties he goes to and who he takes drinks from. He will know that there are people out there who desire him only for his body and who will do anything to get it. That's a powerful lesson to learn in life! @@dodger712
That "friend" is someone you are better without being in your life.
Thats a terrifying experience that no one should go through.
I was dosed, raped and robbed years ago, and because I'm a guy and promiscuous and gay and would have probably slept with the guy anyway, it took me 15 years to even admit I was raped(even though I was literally trying to flee the bar and get away from him because I was creeped out and feeling off when he caught up with me). Serious loss of power. Very sad and hard to deal with. Thanks for sharing.
Consent is consent. No means no. In the U.K. the law has only just changed to include those under the influence of drink or drugs can’t give consent. In the past date rape was ‘blame the victim’ time. It’s a bit better here now but it still happens. I sympathise with you.
Unfortunately, in this society, no one cares. Not even therapy
@@Ramzbloodwhy can't we fight to change that. Men and women. I have so many male friends with so much deep seeded trauma that they can't talk about to the normal population and that needs to stop
Had something similar
@@RamzbloodThat is not true. Millions of us care but we can't be everywhere nor can we help everybody. Look at all of the people 's comments wishing him well and telling him that they respect and love him. We do care. Hopefully life gets better and better for him.
Hey Dylan I truly get your pain. I was raped by my 15 year old cousin while he was babysitting me... I was 4 or 5. My Mom took my grandmother grocery shopping. As soon as the car drove away he was carrying me on his shoulders up to my bedroom. He put himself in me and it seemed like 15 minutes. It hurt bad. My Mom was gone for maybe 45 minutes. She pulled the car in and I got dressed quick and went running. I was halfway down the stairs and he yelled if you tell anyone about this your going to get in big trouble. I ran out and got in the car. We dropped my grandmother off and I sat my parents down and tried explaining what happened. My father never really cared about me so he didn't say anything. My Mom said his grandmother was so sick with heart issues if this came out it would have killed her. So nothing was ever done to him. He was sooooo pervy he tried raping his own sister.
... Very evil person.
I'm sorry that assault happened to you and it wasn't your fault. And as far as that friend goes she wasn't a true friend. You can find better than her. Blessings & love my friend.
Dylan, thank you for sharing your story and I do understand what you're going through. I was leaving a bar in Cambridge, Mass. when I was accosted, knocked out and driven to an abandoned apartment where the actual assault took place through the night, to be left there by sunrise. I did not know who he was and the police really never ,made any serious attempt to investigate. I do not want to make this graphic, but even being seriously injured, the police more or less shrugged it off as soon as they heard I had been leaving a bar when it happened. (I was not drunk, but tell them that). I was 21 years old then and the 21st year mark is soon coming on Nov. 1st. I dread it every year and even after 20 odd years I still have the occasional dream, nightmare. But life does get better, and one thing I learned, and it took me a while is you didn't do anything wrong. I had never imagined, ever, something like that could happen to me, as you also said. It is not part of men's lives, so we are taught. That took a long time to sort out.
Thank you for sharing as doing this does provide a lot to those of us who need the support. I hope you're doing well now, wish you the best
My ex got raped by a guy he thought was helping him after he was knocked out in a bar. It took over, became a hatred for gay people, and do this day has never gotten past it! It can change you as a person, and I’m glad you are not letting this be the future for you. Don’t punish yourself for another’s sin!
Thank you for your courage in promoting awareness and compassion for fellow survivors! Peace be upon you.
I found your Coming Out video recently and am now following you. Really enjoy your authentic style of storytelling, so vivid and clear. I'm so glad that you have a calling to help others because I can really feel your golden heart.
Your story compelled me to say this to you. You are a brave, intelligent, kind, and loving man who survived a horrific event. You are a true man for having the courage to survive and help others. You could not defend yourself as a man because you were taken advantage of and drugged. There is nothing you could have done differently because that mobster took away your abilities to defend yourself. You are in my prayers that you are ok physically and emotionally. Thank you for sharing your story. We have a lot in common. Nice to know there are survivors out there and we are not alone. ❤
And don’t feel bad about being roofied. That was not your fault and I can understand why you didn’t want to press charges, even though I wish you had for your sake, but it’s not your fault not your fault at all you need to believe that.
❤❤❤
James as a victim myself it wouldn’t have mattered.
@@danielkoher1944dani no one deserves this to happen to then love , I’m sorry this happened to you to your a strong person love yourself xx
Ee de equi
That was shocking. Im a woman in my 50's and your experience sickened me. Im sorry you had to go through this. You are a survivor. God bless you x
He lies through his teeth, dont believe him.
@@Michelasdissapointmentandanger
You’re cruel and heartless. Period!
Dylan I am sorry. I really am. It takes a lot to overcome this crisis and take your life back. You are right about the police not doing anything to assist. The impact is deep. That is the part people do not understand. The scar and hurt will always run deep. Someone will be helped by you sharing this experience in your life.
I’m so sorry this happened. I hope the best for you.❤
You ARE one tough cookie. But you were DRUGGED, you were traumatized, you were in shock-that’s what predators know how to do to their victims. And your friend-as others have commented-she was NOT a friend. SHAME ON HER. And you weren’t rambling. You spoke fine. Young man, you’re a hero, a survivor, and you are beyond strong. I’m proud of you. Very proud. Sending you blessings.
Drugging someone is not a fair fight and It took an incredibly strong man to talk about that horrific experience the way you just did. You have one powerful soul.
What a terrible situation. I'm so sorry you went through that. I was drugged at a party and almost raped but my best friend interrupted the guy and got me out of there. P.S. You are such a handsome guy and you sound like a beautiful person. I could listen to you talk all day..hehe...your accent is so cute. I'm from CA and so I dont hear guys who talk like you. Big Hugs to you!!
You never lost a friend. That woman was never your friend. Thank you for sharing your story!
I’m a woman and I’ve been through the same thing. I felt the same way after it happened. I blamed myself. I thought I should not have been there. What did I do wrong? I didn’t press charges for the same reason. I didn’t want to relive it. Finally I realized there was nothing I could do and I survived. I was overpowered by a man much larger and stronger and I cried and kept saying no. I told a few people and got no support. It’s a horrible thing to go through. I’m so sorry it happened to you. You can’t blame yourself and be thankful you survived and can tell your story. It is one many share and understand. ❤
Sorry you had to experience that.
Thank you for sharing a very personal story. It takes a lot of courage to admit to this kind of experience. I'm sure many will be able to identify they too felt ashamed but, this was not your fault, and you were not able to defend yourself. Healing does take time more of the mind than the body. I hope, and am sure your life will improve over time as the healing takes effect. God bless.
Thank you for sharing your story. You are on the road to healing. You are not to blame for what happened. These people are not your friends. Please know that you have many people who support you. I am here for you.
Dylan, thank you so much for sharing your story. Being a survivor myself, I know how difficult it can be to put blame on yourself or beat yourself up, but you did absolutely nothing wrong. You're so brave for sharing your story. The more of us who share, the more awareness there will be and hopefully will help someone in the process. My heart is with you, brother. 💖
You explained perfectly why so many women that have had the same thing happen to them don't always report it. Just remember it was nothing you did, the blame is all on the other guy. If nothing else you learned from it, too bad he won't be held accountable but if this is a pattern with him maybe he will at some point
Yes I’m one of those women !
Dylan, I’m very sorry to hear your story, mainly because it mirrors my life experience almost exactly. I can understand how that makes you feel incredibly guilty right afterwards because you are constantly questioning what did YOU do to make something like this happen. You go through the, “if only I had done this…” or “if only I had done that”. But the bottom line is, you did nothing wrong. You were assaulted, period. This happened to me in my early 20s, and I am now 64 years old. It gets better. I had therapy and I’ve been able to move past the experience and can now look back on it as something sad, but the rage and anger is gone. I’ve had a very successful life with very meaningful relationships so I know personally, that it does get better. You will heal and the negative feelings you may have about yourself will go away. Hopefully they have already gone away for you. But please, never ever question yourself. It was not your fault and you could not have done anything differently to change the outcome. I am happy that you can speak of the experience and are willing to reach out to help others that have experienced something similar. You are a good person.
What a beautiful post Rick. So comforting, so consoling and uplifting. I thank you for sharing as I’m sure Daniel is as well. Love and peace, Gord in Winnipeg Canada.
You are a valuable Man! Always remember that you were drugged your control over the situation was stolen from you . This would never have happened to you if it was a fair fight. Remember that when ever you have a nightmare. Stay strong ❤️⭐️💪👍💜💙🏳️🌈🇺🇸🍀🌈
Anything can happen when you are living in sin read the Bible 🙏
@charlesfleetwood8585 That's how you witness?
I admire your courage. I had a situation that didn't progress as far, and I am a big dude, but I took a lot longer to learn how to stand up for myself. Your strength is amazing and it's wonderful to see
I am sorry this awful experience happened to you. Thank you very much for sharing this video. God bless you, Dylan.
Hey Dylam mate. TH-cam decided to bring this up on my feed, so my first time watching you. Firstly, NONE of what you went through was your fault nor did you ask for, NONE of it! As someone who has been going through severe gastric distress for 9 months shy of a decade now which sees me have to be super careful what I ingest the thought of someone having their food or drink spiked makes me feel a lot of anger as what we ingest is so personal. And of course any drug that might be okay for someone could kill someone else, and you handsome man were clearly drugged, so a double assault if you will. Lucky you got out of that alive on multiple levels. Btw, as an Englishman (London) my favourite American accent is from the South, just love it! 😊 I could listen to you recite the phone book, haha. I would genuinely love to meet you one day, you have such a lovely warm presence.
Having just written the above I just read the description to your channel here, and love what you say about; ''heal your life through self-love''.... Absolutely! What I am doing but on a physical level, although the last 9+ years (the last 3.5 years especially) has been very much a spiritual journey too as I evolve.
Big hugs to you lovely man, and thank you for sharing.
Dude, that was a tough video to make. And you did it so well. You are a great man for speaking out about it. Discussing what happened to you, helps to heal others that don't say anything. As well, I have found that as tough as it is to do, the repeated disclosure will heal you even more. i built a new app to provide people, when meeting online, to be able to rate a situation anonymously, post-engagement, Once a user builds up a great composite rating, then that user can share that they are good people.
Now, that pos person who assaulted you, would probably not be on my app, and that refusal to have a composite rating to share, that in itself would help someone in deciding to being their friend in the first place. Just saying, that as you plan on helping others with your videos, for me it was building the app that has helped me to heal as well.
It gets better bro, but its a trigger that won't go away but you get better at handling the response to the triggers when they come about and you become able to guide your reactions. You should be proud of yourself.
sadly this is a common thing , it happened to me when I was 17 & now I'm 53 & I still can't think about it with out great anxiety . All I can think is he could have killed me I feel / felt disgusting . That women was not your friend
I still would have pressed charges! He’s a predator…
YES
Women as sexual predators. I just wanted to say something on this topic I have had experiences of being groped and sexually assaulted a few times and nothing like the experience you have had but all of the perpetrators in my case have been women. E.g. I was only 26 and I had to get my female colleagues at work to walk in front of me and behind me whenever I went near the lunchroom to avoid a particular woman groping me or pinching my ass. I had an ex boss try kissing me tongue down the throat and grope me at a Christmas party in front of my partner. She claimed she was going to turn me straight coz I just hadn't met the right woman. I can't wear my uniform especially at nights out in London e.g. for the trooping of the colour because of women mostly drunk trying to lift my kilt. I was in a bar and nearly stepped on a woman's face she was lying on the floor trying to take a picture under my kilt. I get so sick of it women have a right to be treated with dignity and respect by men always but they also have an obligation to do the same to men. If I went around lifting womens dresses or trying to take pics underneath I would be arrested in minutes. Women seem to think that because you are a man A. you are gonna enjoy that sort of disgusting attention from women B. That is just a bit of harmless fun. Neither is true and sadly I can attest that women are not always the victims of sexual abuse in my case they have always been the perpetrators.
I have experienced sexual harassment from women also
Wow! That’s horrible that those things happened to you.
@@edwinholcombe2741 I too, experienced the groping & pinching from 2 females when I was in high school. You are told as a young man that you A want it & B like it.....hello...are you speaking for me? Instead of "turning me straight"....I was a blank slate of sexuality during my teens & this bad touching turned me off women for like over a decade...I didn't go to my junior & senior prom....I didn't have a single "romantic girlfriend" all the way through my first 4 college years. I didn't have a "romantic girlfriend" until around age 28 in 2002....she was unlike all these disgusting perpetrating females. So there's my story where I can relate to your experiences. I am not ruling out the possibility, but at 49, I have never been married & am highly unlikely to have a female romantic partner again.
THANKS FOR SHARING BUDDY. I went through something when I was 10 with the neighbor next door. I didn't have a say in what got done about things at all. My dad blamed me for what happened and would not let the police prosecute the guy next door. He was 18 and a lot bigger than me. I was forced to go into therapy for months and the doctor continually made me relive it every time I visited. That year was one of the worst of my life and I still deal with it.
While I appreciate that therapy can be important and cathartic, people consistently fail to realize that part of the therapeutic process is reliving the trauma. And if a therapist is impatient, or inept then they can do more harm then good.
I’m also a gay man, and I just have to say, I kind of hate your ‘best friend’ as much as the guy that roofied you. Your best friend is supposed your safe port in any storm! The fact that she didn’t believe you at all is so shocking, and honestly, evil. Had she believed you, I think getting through it would have been easier, you might have been able to go to the police, maybe stop him from doing this to someone else, etc. i hope you can tell her that someday. (I just had a really DARK thought! What if she conspired with the rapist to let this happen to you, throwing the party, conveniently leaving with everyone else, him having the roofie ready and knowing he’d have the opportunity, her keeping everyone away for so long. Like what the fuck?!). Maybe don’t have ANY contact with her!
Dont lose in humankind, though. Most of us are good people and act in good faith. You are a survivor and will get your strength back.
I survived institutional sexual abuse in a group home for 5 years. This is something that will never leave you but if you become good at channeling the emotions this causes you will find yourself in a position where when you think about it you dont have a pannic attack or get angry and take it out on the worng people. It has been a life long struggle for me. But know you are not alone, what happened was not your fault in any way. Therapy is necessary. Trauma specialist. Do it. I promise it will help you. Most insurance covers it now.
Dylan thanks for having the courage to share that horrendous experience. It has given me the courage to face my experiences in a more positive light. Again thanks and praying that your memory is healed. You are one amazing person.
Dylan, you're a beautiful soul. Thank you for telling your story.
So sorry this happened to you. Kudos for sharing this, raising awareness, and maybe even helping someone else.
I was *nearly* raped decades ago, but I had not been drugged like you and was able to fight him off. I dreamt about it for a while after, but thankfully those faded years ago.
*I* belive you, bud. Hugs.
god bless you! I"m sorry you had to go through that. there are so many of us that share a similar story/experience and dont or cant talk about it. much love to you for sharing your story
I had a very similar experience to you Dylan. At first it was so difficult to face and the worst was facing my family and friends and telling them. It takes time to get over the guilt and embarrassment..but it will happen. The positive side is it makes you so much more critical of your decisions and to trust your instincts. Good luck my man..Marcus❤
You look not disgusting… love yourself.. hugs
YOU ARE SPECIAL. FORGIVE YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT AT FAULT IN ANY WAY. HOPE YOU ARE FULLY HEALED. BE SAFE !!! LOVE YOU !
I'm very proud of you sharing your trauma experience.. I know what you been thru.. I was sexually assault when I was young it was quite traumatizing experience.. You aren't alone on that.. It was not your fault & you did nothing wrong. You were drugged & wasn't able to defend yourself thru trauma process.. Don't blame yourself for it.. Even tho you drank wine it is not consider cheating or anything.. You did not cheat on your ex.. I'm glad you have recovered from your trauma experience and it made you stronger person.. As for your former lifelong friend she was not true friend.. True friends would stand besides you & support you but she choose not to. That is sad its painful to lose her but she showed her true side.. Now just be extra cautious who you trust & develop friendship with.. Remember you are good person & with good heart.. I can tell by watched your videos you are amazing man.. You are not alone & you got me as your support & good listener.. I'll keep watching your videos & enjoying them.. I really enjoying watching your videos.. 😊
My deepest apologies to you for this horrible experience. I was abused as a child by a sick stepfather and I grew up with unrelenting guilt. Fortunately, I found an awesome therapist to help me work through the feelings. I wish you the very best and you’re so brave for sharing such a traumatic experience!
I had a very similar thing happen when I was 28 and just came out. At that time I was drinking and partying every other weekend, so I could handle my alcohol. I went to a party and the home owner gave me the creeps right from the start when he reached inside my shirt and started playing with my chest hair and making comments on it. That night i had only two drinks that were brought to me by that person and I could not move, I was out of it, so he and one other dragged me to a bedroom where I thought I could recover. How long later I do not know, he had forced himself on me and I was a little more awake but all I could do was cry and repeat no, stop over and over. I now know from others that this is his routine , and does that to many guys. If I see him again I will be going to jail for deleting him.
….people don’t believe things like this until it happens to you. The sad thing is MOST men have NO ONE to talk to (i.e. family or friends) about the assault and life HAS to go on for us who are abused and we have to bury it inside of us! Plus, you are LABELED less than a man if it happens to you and that is sad!
Dylan, you are such a sweet, young man. And you are absolutely gorgeous. None of what happened was your fault in the slightest! HE DRUGGED YOU, how could that possibly be your fault! I am so sorry that happened to you! You didn’t deserve to have that happen to you! And it is incredible that you made this video to help others! YOU ARE AMAZING!
Thank you for your honesty and telling your story.
I’m a survivor, too. I was aged 5 - 7 years old at the time. It was 1959 - 1961. My perpetrator was our neighbor, a married guy with two teenage kids. I was groomed and lured until he could spring his trap.
I never told anyone until 2013 when I began therapy.
We live with the trauma and the awful truth all of our lives. Every day.
I’m sorry for what you went through. I was molested when I a child then joined the military to get away from the abuse only to suffer more from several fellow soldiers. I had no one to talk to for years. Tried reporting all of it and had a hard time finding someone to listen to me and believe me. Finally years later with the help of therapy I’m able to cope.
Thank you for being brave and putting this out there. I’ve been through this at a party that devolved into an orgy around me passed out on the couch and people took my lack of response through coming in and out as a tacit approval. I’m not friends with that group anymore.
What an awful thing to happen! I can’t imagine! So sorry this happened to you 😢. I have a friend, a male, that was made intoxicated by a female friend who took advantage of him. The sad part is nobody believed him, except me. I told him, why would he say something like that if it weren’t true. He felt emasculated. There would be no reason whatsoever for him to reveal something so personal and humiliating.
So sad that you went through all this! But I'm happy that you have shared your story and that you have found a path forward. Much love and big hugs to you!
Prayers Dylan, nobody deserves this done to them . I’m so glad you put this out there because you hear a lot about women going through this but not men. Some one like yourself is going to see this same thing and might help them too . 🙏🏼 ❤
Don't be hard on yourself that you were unable to stop it. He knew what he needed to do to have you in that vulnerable state. Reflect on the thought that you were a victim at the time, but you're a survivor now.
Remember...that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger...he was the coward weakling who had to drug you to force you. You are a hero for sharing your experience
Terrible. Evil stuff. Young people gotta stop thinking that drinking and drugging is “fun” in most social circles have snakes lurking around and this is why. Poor guy, glad he survived and telling your story is a powerful thing
Saludos desde México. I'm new to your channel, but I know exactly how you felt. I'm an old old man now, but I was raped twice when I was a young man. Like you I used to be very slender and really short to boot. I'm 5ft 4 inches tall. I got gang raped the first time and the second time was kind of like what happened to you. I was drugged and woke up with a massive guy on top of if me. I felt so emasculated, and the eating disorders followed. Don't beat yourself up for it, it wasn't your fault, but I'm 68 years old and certain things trigger and remind me of those horrible experiences. I'm going right back to the beginning and subscribe. You are an amazing story teller and a lovely person.
I'm so sorry this happened to you hermano I hope you're doing alright
I’ve been in that exact situation too. I feel your pain. I am grateful you shared your experience. I hope that I can too one day. Like you I am grateful for the lessons that I have been able to take from it and finally being able to take back power over my life, and denying that person the power they perceived to have. I wish you well Dylan!
Cheers,
-Dylan L.
A very honest video about a terrible experience. Your story should be a help to others.
If the one person you trust as your best friend doesn't believe you, how can anyone expect you to tell what happened to police? So many times, the blame gets put on the victim. In the worst of times, you find out who are truly your friends. I don't blame you for not wanting to tell anyone or report it. I can imagine how embarrassing you would feel having to tell it to strangers, go to court, have all your family watch you relive what you went through when you testified. But this will make you stronger in the long run. Now anyone you get creepy vibes from someone you will never accept a drink from them. Sharing this story proves you have moved on and didn't let it be what defines you and you took the experience as something to help and warn others. Sounds like you do have someone in your life now that respects and understands you. Thanks for sharing, and keep up your good nature bro!
God bless you Dylan. You are so brave to share your story. I’m praying for you. I hope the healing process makes you whole again in Jesus name.
Dylan, thank you for sharing your story of what happened to you and how it affected your self esteem. I am glad you are making videos and speaking out. No one should have to endure assault of any kind from anyone. In 2010, I left a long term relationship with a man that had verbally abused me throughout the relationship. He never physically hurt me, but he tore down my self esteem. I left him and had to take out a restraining order so he could never come near me. He lives in a different coast than I do. I trust that I will never set eyes on him. I wish you the best. I am sorry the woman friend did not believe you. She should have supported you and been a true friend.
As you were telling the events that unfolded in your story, I could not help but be so angry and upset over what this man did to you and the aftermath of it as well as losing a good friend who made the circumstances that much worst. Shame on the both of them. You took great courage telling this story and using this as a platform to let others know who dealt with this situation that you're willing to be a voice for them and help them through it as well. I am curious to your next videos to how you mentally healed through this experience as im sure it was no walk in the park. All the best Dylan!
I’m so sorry this happened to you. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for anything. Everything that happened was his fault. ❤️
Thank you very much for relating and sharing your experience. And please believe me when I say that you didn't ramble on about it. Not even in the slightest. And it's not your fault. What you're doing, especially here in this video, is very important and I'm glad I discovered your channel to learn about your strength and resilience. Hope you keep doing the good work that you're doing and stay strong in the process:)
Thanks for this video. It really helped me to better understand how this kind of thing can happen and how it affects them.
Wow! Thank you, much love.❤❤
Dylan what happened to you was not your fault I hope that by telling your story it will help other sexual assault victims you are brave for speaking about your assault I understand why you didn't go to the police
I want to thank you for sharing such a dramatic story. I hope you're doing much better now. It seems like you are doing much better. I am a mental health professional and a college professor. I would love to use your story in some of my classes.
The way you cope with this evil incident says you have a brave and beautiful mine. I have nothing but admiration for you.
I am glad that you got it all out on the camera. It is important for victims to be able to do that, to process it all.
But if you think at any time you still have PTSD, do not be afraid to ask for professional help. Always remember: you don’t have to fight this alone. You are not alone!
Sending all the love and good wishes 🙏
I'm so sorry that happened to you! I hope you have found the strength to get the therapy you need to deal with this and its after-effects. I'm also sorry about the loss of your friend. I too was sexually assaulted once and never told anyone about it for many years. I hope you get closure and justice and peace.
Oh Dylan no, NONE of this was your fault. I'm amazed that you could tell the story and be calm about it. That shows that you have done a lot of emotional work and I'm sure it was one of the most painful psychological events you have experienced. He drugged you and from you say, he raped you. He knew exactly what he was doing. I am SO glad nothing happened to your physical health. As I was listening I was wondering "oh god PLEASE don't let this other guy "finish" with no protection.
I can't imagine what you went through. Sharing this story took a lot of courage. Hugs my friend.
You had a close encounter with a malignant narcissist, and your friend was manipulated in advance. Everything was set up. I'm sorry
I’m sorry this happened to you.
When I was 30 something similar happened to me. I am now in my 50’s and still working through it.
Good luck to you.❤
Stay strong. You did the right thing coming forward. It also might help someone from not becoming a victim.
You’re a brave strong man, sorry you were violated and your friend not believing you is a real slap in the face.
You've done an amazing job articulating the details of your experience and feelings. That's something to be proud of. Imagine all the people that have been helped by your sharing.
I am so sorry this happened to you. No one deserves to be abused. I will say I find it suspicious that that guy was invited to your going away party, and that your friend conveniently went to the store just after you were given that drink. But whether she was in it or not, it’s enough that she didn’t believe you. Glad that you ended that friendship. She was not your real friend.
You're a very brave man. I suggest that you file a police report on the guy. With sexual assault many states have lifted the statute of limitations so in the state in which this happened. In LA there is no statute of limitations.
Dylan, SO very sorry this occured to you 😢. SO sorry you lost your female best friend over believing that your mutual male friend would do this to you!!! Please understand that this was NOT your doing!!!! It happened to you, you did NOT ask for this to happen to you!!! (For everyone to be gone as long as they were, I have to wonder did your female best friend and ya'll's mutual friend in cahoots???) You did NOT cheat on your boyfriend!!!!
I Love your stories and events from your life. Thank you for sharing your life with us. Dylan, if you ever find yourself single again, I would LOVE to be your boyfriend/future husband.
being drugged incapacitates you, so you cannot defend/protect yourself! the shame is on the one who drugged you. how can you give consent when you are blacked out? the worst is when people do not believe you. and post traumatic stress is difficult. i hope you learn to love yourself for surviving this.
Thanks for your bravery in speaking up. It happened to me in the 90s before there was effective treatment for HIV. I was so terrified for weeks because it took a long time to show up in tests. There was no way I was going to the police because he was a sheriff’s deputy. Who are they going to believe- little gay guy or their “popular guy” coworker?
I found out through a friend who stayed in that town that he got caught and fired from the police force, but of course he wasn’t charged. Why do these guys keep getting away with it? It really had a very negative effect on my life and mental health. I tried to get help, but I kept running into the situation where the counselor / psychologist said they don’t specialize in it, but all the special services were for women only. I think the first step to getting services set up for men in all regions is awareness thanks to people like you who have the courage to talk publicly about their experiences, so thank you and I hope you’re doing okay. 🤗
Dylan, sorry for what you went through. You did a brave thing by coming forward and sharing your story. It’s a stark reminder that anyone can be the victim of sexual assault and that it has a profound and lasting impact on people’s lives. Hope this message finds you well and that you continue to heal. Be well.
Dylan, you have a very kind heart, no arrogance, no hatred.
You are a very loveable person.
Good wishes for you.
Please always take good care of yourself.
I can feel your sincerity.
WTFF?! I am so sorry to you. This happened to me, as well. Except it was 3 much bigger men than me... I'm a short 5'6" guy. It changed me, too. 💙
You're a brave man to get this out there and openly talk about it, especially now with all the hate going on. You're strong, you did nothing wrong. There was nothing you could do to defend yourself, you were drugged.
Again, you are very brave. More power to you, man, and keep up the good work !
I skipped school age 15 to see a blue movie in a cinema. I was roped there but it was so dark that I couldn't identify the rapist who fled. I just had to carry on as if nothing had happened.
No body realizes how often this happens, and when you’re a gay male the devastating thing is we blame ourselves, no one believes you, no one wants to talk about it. And effects every part of you for the rest of your life. I like you was very good looking and always wondered if I gave off the wrong idea or said something that would make people come after me all the time . Now I’m much older and look at my younger pictures and realize how beautiful and handsome I was . People would later go on to tell me they thought I was out of their league and honestly I had no idea . But I was attacked several times in the late 70s and badly beaten in the mid 80s and i still vividly remember every time. My heart goes out to you and anyone else who reads this and understands. It now seems very far away and it was a different place and time , but seek out thearpy it helped a lot just don’t relive it all .
123rd as a Gay Boomer.....I was sexually assaulted / raped at 16 ....this happened in 1976 ......I had severe stomach pains / diareaha and bleeding....for a day or 2 ..... I never told anyone ...and blamed myself for putting myself in a bad situation.....plus it was 1976...who was I gonna tell? There were no REAL Good influences on TV....no social Media.... now at 63 married to hubby..together 23yrs... it's a long distant memory..... I envy young people today for having More Avenues of HELP and examples of a Positive Life to Live as a young LGBTQ person
God bless you day by day
I’m so sorry for what happened to you, you’re so strong to speak about this
Dylan: I know this happened quite a while ago but I just came across your story. I'm very sorry this happened to you. Whatever you do, don't ever blame yourself for anything that happened. You were just at the wrong place at the wrong time. After all, you didn't drug yourself! The cold truth is that you were raped and in a perfect world, the rapist would be arrested, prosecuted, and punished. I know another man that this exact same thing happened to. He did try to go after the man who did this to him but, unfortunately, discovered it is very difficult for one man to prove that he was raped by another man. It's difficult enough for a woman to prove that she was raped and that's why so many rapes go unreported. Anyway, I just felt the need to tell you not to blame yourself or feel guilty about what happened. Take good care and God bless. DE
He DEFINITELY put something in your drink and i hope he gets arrested thats DISGUSTING