When you’ve only unlocked “unlucky”, “mediocre” and “jailbird”, d’ya think maaaaybe you need to change something abou- You know what, never mind. I just realised who I’m talking to.
@bananasinfrench *i was looking through the comments to see if anyone else had noticed that and to see if anyone here watches Jackaboy i'm so happy they do :-)*
Here's a great hint, Kevin: get a car and when you try to murder someone choose "drive by". That's the easiest way to not get caught. Keep up the great videos!
So, I was curious about Bitlife so I grabbed it today and played around with it for a while. Character started out as an unplanned pregnancy between a student and a volunteer fire fighter. Got good grades, came out as gay, got a scholarship, finished college and got a good job, was married twice, had a son, adopted a wolf, unlocked three career paths, owned a home and three cars throughout her life, (Toyota Tacoma lasted 55 years btw) and lived to the ripe old age of 121 with a net worth of $2,500,462. She was a self made millionaire, and had a 43% "looks" bar on the day she died. That was my first Bitlife experience, so I guess all, and all can't complain?
Richest I’ve gotten: 43 Million. I spent 3 hours embezzling funds from the bank I worked at. You can embezzle as much as you want within 1 year until you get caught, then if you plead guilty you usually get only 1 year in prison. Then just emigrate to a different country, change your name and repeat.
"'eyelid surgery?' what does that even do? they're always in the way." *closes eyes* "i can't see because of them half the time." he is speaking the language of gods
when kevin said he didnt collect any heirlooms i opened bitlife and collected mine which was the super rare thomas edison light bulb that sells for $275k when he said he was naming his character
i mean in neopets i’m constantly gambling, but i went to vegas and just kind of loitered in the casino bc i didn’t wanna lose all my money. different stakes lol
Fun fact: babies cry when born due to differences in temperature and environment it also expels the amniotic fluid from their lungs a babies first official cry shows their lungs are working
16:50 I'm man enough to admit when this happened my first thought was.... What are the odds my computer would lag at the exact time Kevin mentioned lagging
Laughed so hard at this one. Hardest i've laughed since when i first found you. ( just in general) It's been 40 degrees all day today, i'm pregnant & sore + my country is on fire. Thanks for the constant laughs Kevin, needed it today in particular.
Kevin. I need to say this... thank you. I've been watching your videos for a long ass time and I'm going to be honest. You saved me from suicide a long time ago. I was playing with my 12 guage... putting it in my mouth and gently toying with the trigger when I got a notification... like a full on one from you. I put the shotgun down and liked the title... clicked it and never looked back. Been enjoying your content ever since. I love what you do man, keep smiling and questioning social norms.
I would just like to say though... Kevin, you post a video every day just to make people happy. I laugh at every single one of your videos because you're just funny. You always make everybody smile and you should keep it up. You helped me make the perfect villain in Drama, Jim Pickens! Keep going with all your heart and I hope you get even further one day.
"Oh, you wait till I'm old, I'm going to have so many kids and so many pets and set them free in the wild." - Kevin My brain: The kids are going to be his pets, aren't they?
Has anyone ever thought about how a video has only been out 2 minutes and there was 2840 views that would mean there’s 2840 people all sitting there doing the exact same thing for 20 minutes
I once actually tried to do well in BitLife. I was director of engineering, had a wife for over fifty years, made over a million dollars, had a few children, never committed a crime, had max stats at one moment (100% across the board), but then my character wouldn’t die... A year or two before his death, he gets *falsely* accused of murder, pays max price to contest; it fails. Then in prison he appeals (max price again) IT *WoRkS*. But then he’s left depressed, no money, everyone hates him, wife divorces him, then he dies a year later at the age of 120! Wtf He then gets called a jailbird, unsuccessful, waister, etc. Wtf I’m never trying to do well again! Soz just had to vent
*Gets rejected* *You no longer suffer from depression* Its a fact that the human depression value maximum is 256, everyone is born with around 50-100 and it fluctuates from there (mostly rises). Everything aboce 200 is major depression ,but if you manage to get over 256 the system is overloaded and the depression value reverts back to 0. Your life wont be any better ,but youll stop caring
"It helps filling the void, because of... not having a life" This film was posted on 8th Jan 2020. Little did he know, what shit was going to hit the fan in a mere few weeks.
@@scrublover0529 I found it super easy to do basically anything in it so there was no real challenge, as well as it being fairly limited without premium options
This has been one of my favourite series that you're doing and you posted this on my birthday so I'd just like to say thank you for making my day even better :)
Kevin, I don't have a quote or a timestamp, I just want to tell you how great you are. I see people all the time take for granted how much they help others around them, and how successful they really are. You're charming, funny, entertaining, and very talented. We love you Kevin.
"It's unusual, I'm usually the one starting the fire. But maybe I get paid on like how many fires I put out. Then I can just start loads of them." I believe that is a hero complex, Kev. Only you won't be doing it for the sake of saving lives😂😂
Watching this I came across the related video regarding “Façade”. It was a golden one. Would love to see you bringing it back to explore... whatever the real objective of that game was. And variants. Just thinking at loud. Thank you.
At 14:51 your son 'Dick' that you abandoned was promoted to "Master Chief Petty Officer in the military!? Wow....That's amazing! (Also love the easter egg btw!) Keep the Bitlife videos, they're fecking awesome!
I know this will likely never be seen, but if Kevin is interested in starting fires, he should go back to "Sims 3" and play with the "Ambitions" pack. He can have a Sim become a fire fighter, and since the player controls that particular career, he could kill SO MANY Sims. :P
Kevin: dates a girl with max craziness
Also Kevin: complains when that girl does insane stuff
Kevin's only complaining because hes used to being the crazy one
Relatable
Yup
"Ella está loca de la cabeza, pero ese cula es fuera de este mundo."
Craziness does have one good thing it's required to have them agree to a threesome
Light bulb: Who are you?
Woman: You had a baby with me
Light bulb: do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?
This fits better with The Seed
Bat man beyond meme whoooo
"This is America. I can sue anyone!"
-Kevin, 2020
Shit it's already 2020
Cpt Patrick yup
yup...
That’s my favourite childish gambino line
@@dragoxk4542 guns in my area
😂🤣😂🤣
“Yes, I won! I won $100k! And all it cost me was my penis.”
Kevin, you make me laugh so much with these random lines. Never change.
“I think I picked the wrong thing at University. Can I go back? Please?”
When Kevin hits too close to home 😭
😂
You want to talk about something
Computer systems and networks. I have a future.
jimmy jones wow good for you. fuck off
As someone who also got a math degree... yes
When you’ve only unlocked “unlucky”, “mediocre” and “jailbird”, d’ya think maaaaybe you need to change something abou-
You know what, never mind. I just realised who I’m talking to.
To be fair, the "Unlucky" achievement is only possible if your character dies at a very early age.
@@sergioruizmoreno5247 Houdini is so hard to get
@@MarcusCollins69 Mostly because it relies on luck.
@@MarcusCollins69 my dad won the houdini achievement
"Oh nooooo my wife died"
2 sec later
"Ah it was just my father"
Quality content
@@kavaler1471 Still only 1 reply
@@kavaler1471 LoL its 4 lmaooo
When Jacksepticeye lives a happier life with Light's sister while Light is struggling.
Bully: you are a teachers pet
Light bulb: let’s see what the teacher has to say about this
Thezwolf 🙏👋
Buck Nasty yes that is what he says
Principal not teacher
Omg i think we watched the same video or something
@@Punttipate62 it's almost as if quoting the video without any further comment is kinda pointless and in no way, shape or form original
Kevin, yelling: YES! MY WIFE IS DEAD!
Anna from another room: [chuckles] I'm in danger
75'th like
*Bitlife but I ruin everyone's life*
Me: Don't you do that anyway?
Ikr
Uwad
I mean, I’d say he’s equally improved my life as much as he ruined my sense of humor
More like Bore Ragnarok amirite?
Lolol
Good Feckin point
Are we just glossing over the fact that he put Jacksepticeye in as a custom character
3:24
Victor Rodriguez fecking legend
@bananasinfrench *i was looking through the comments to see if anyone else had noticed that and to see if anyone here watches Jackaboy i'm so happy they do :-)*
@@victorrodriguez9412 it doesn’t show up until 4:43
I thought theyre both just saved into the game
“porn mathematics”
Our dear leader creating new jobs each and every day, a true man on the culture.
He would make Stalin blush
Truly the job we all want.
The guy that writes smart things on the chalk board in the background of a porn video
That job almost certainly exists..
Yep, 34+35 is the math
"Why do they always reject me?"
Says the man with no eyelids.
I dont get it
"No vaccinations please"
Kevin has officially turned to the dark side
Hugo van de voort Kevin has been on the 'dark side' since his first Sims 4 video
@@ww7767 They won't cause there is no light in the basement.
SkillsNeverStop kdnfnsjaksj that was good
Kevin was born on the dark side
"Only vaccinate the kids you want to keep". He abandoned every one of them, so that seemed reasonable.
Here's a great hint, Kevin: get a car and when you try to murder someone choose "drive by". That's the easiest way to not get caught.
Keep up the great videos!
Oh yeah because they might not know who you are
I usually push them off a cliff because it almost always kills them, and there's no witnesses. I've only gotten caught doing that like twice, I think.
"I just gave away my son"
"Why am I unhappy"
*Life is so unfair, isn't it?*
Kevin wonders why he can't adopt children when he literally puts his own up for adoption
“If I break up with her will I still have to look after the children?” Well it worked for my dad
If you only said this as a joke, DAAAAANG.
If you actually meant it, I’m sorry to hear that. That’s really crappy. :(
I felt that
Zoe Thomson works for many I’ve heard
Zoe Thomson same
Same
Kevin: “She died! I am never going to get rich at all! ...Oh wait! That’s my father! That’s fine! Oh Jesus.”
2:53 it says "I'm starting to feel as though my son, q, could become a psychopath"
wonder where he got it from
So, I was curious about Bitlife so I grabbed it today and played around with it for a while.
Character started out as an unplanned pregnancy between a student and a volunteer fire fighter. Got good grades, came out as gay, got a scholarship, finished college and got a good job, was married twice, had a son, adopted a wolf, unlocked three career paths, owned a home and three cars throughout her life, (Toyota Tacoma lasted 55 years btw) and lived to the ripe old age of 121 with a net worth of $2,500,462. She was a self made millionaire, and had a 43% "looks" bar on the day she died.
That was my first Bitlife experience, so I guess all, and all can't complain?
oh wow that’s a better life than most of my lives
damn good for her
@@ratsovereign2887 If only we could all be so lucky
Richest I’ve gotten: 43 Million. I spent 3 hours embezzling funds from the bank I worked at. You can embezzle as much as you want within 1 year until you get caught, then if you plead guilty you usually get only 1 year in prison. Then just emigrate to a different country, change your name and repeat.
Daaaamm
"'eyelid surgery?' what does that even do? they're always in the way."
*closes eyes*
"i can't see because of them half the time."
he is speaking the language of gods
Getting sick of these damned eyelids
Why would he say something so brave yet so controversial?
@@blackparademistress1 Not all villains wear capes
when kevin said he didnt collect any heirlooms i opened bitlife and collected mine which was the super rare thomas edison light bulb that sells for $275k when he said he was naming his character
“You meet a female”
“Ok thats good enough for me”
“She rejected me”
I felt that
That whole bit has strong lesbian energy.
same tho
same
*She rejects Kevin*
Kevin: *KILL HER*
@Dead Clout only when you were young? why not keep doing it now, sounds like fun!
In bitlife,
Sometimes I find a date
*THEY ASK ME OUT*
*AND WHEN I ACCEPT, THEY FUCKING REJECT ME LIKE WTF THEY ASKED ME-*
95 years old, PERFECT!
2 SECS LATER:
I HATE OLD PEOPLE!
"Whenever I buy lottery tickets- which is VERY RARE"
Meanwhile in videogames you constantly gamble
At least they aren't real ones lol
i mean in neopets i’m constantly gambling, but i went to vegas and just kind of loitered in the casino bc i didn’t wanna lose all my money. different stakes lol
@@sidoniegabrielle269 so glad i'm not the only one willing to let my neopets starve to get that neopoint jackpot 😭
"Why does it always end up with me going to jail?!"
~Kevin 2020
Lol
Your name
Kevin: I feel like this person is going to have a very good life!
Bitlife: NOT. ON MY. W A T C H.
Hahaha. Exactly! :)
Kazzy I feel like it’s the opposite
Kevin: “Why does it always end up with me going to jail?”
Also Kevin, when any minor inconvenience happens: “MURDER!”
Baby makes happy sound
Kevin: *you're not supposed to do that*
😂 I read that in his voice
@@taylorweaver5935 nah kevin telepathicly read it in your mind
Fun fact: babies cry when born due to differences in temperature and environment it also expels the amniotic fluid from their lungs a babies first official cry shows their lungs are working
Me: Is this loss?
Kevin, releasing his dingo to the wild: Now it is
Loved the little Leo DiCaprio popping up in the corner at the "20-year-old" comment
Jenna Craig kevin throwing shade was the best part of the video
Grognak AND Jack becoming actual characters in the game makes me so happy haha
"They're gonna have a good life!"
Doubt
press 'D' to doubt
Not for long they won’t
Doubt to x press
16:50 I'm man enough to admit when this happened my first thought was.... What are the odds my computer would lag at the exact time Kevin mentioned lagging
The loading circle at 16:53 is just pure evil
Banaan especially since my internet is shite and I'm constantly buffering as it is.
Laughed so hard at this one. Hardest i've laughed since when i first found you. ( just in general) It's been 40 degrees all day today, i'm pregnant & sore + my country is on fire. Thanks for the constant laughs Kevin, needed it today in particular.
kevin: gets crazy fiance
fiance: does something crazy
kevin: "shes crazy"
*surprised pikachu*
“You can’t think of anyone to sue right now” “this is America, you can sue anyone!” tea.
"I'm busy in making babies to abandon them"
Me: I see your a man of culture.
@@AxxLAfriku which is why you have more dislikes than likes on average, and you also promote child s3x, you sick pervert.
I am a PERSON! Ok
Jen Peckerman sounds like genderbent Jim Pickens
Lmao
omg you're right
That's exactly what I thought lol
I have genuinely stopped playing BitLife to watch a video of you playing BitLife. I’m living my best life.
living your best bitlife
"I will name my child one"
*types two*
Its Josephi Krakowski with Flex Seal
Kevin: "Oh feck She died"
Later: "Oh it's my Father THANK GOD !" 14:15
“Why wont they let me adopt?!”
Us: well did you buy a home?
"i wanna commit some crimes, let's adopt a child!"
*Dead child*
Kevin. I need to say this... thank you. I've been watching your videos for a long ass time and I'm going to be honest. You saved me from suicide a long time ago. I was playing with my 12 guage... putting it in my mouth and gently toying with the trigger when I got a notification... like a full on one from you. I put the shotgun down and liked the title... clicked it and never looked back. Been enjoying your content ever since. I love what you do man, keep smiling and questioning social norms.
3:56 I'm very interested in the Jack and Ramona subplot going on
“Alright, i’m gonna be a golden boy until i gather a load of children. Then i can be bad.”
i don’t usually quote stuff, but uh
_w e l l_
Random bit life ad: oh my god i died at the age of 26!
Kevin: first time?
"They called me a teacher's pet... I'll see what the teacher thinks about that!" I feel called out.
I would just like to say though...
Kevin, you post a video every day just to make people happy. I laugh at every single one of your videos because you're just funny. You always make everybody smile and you should keep it up. You helped me make the perfect villain in Drama, Jim Pickens! Keep going with all your heart and I hope you get even further one day.
"Oh, you wait till I'm old, I'm going to have so many kids and so many pets and set them free in the wild." - Kevin
My brain: The kids are going to be his pets, aren't they?
Has anyone ever thought about how a video has only been out 2 minutes and there was 2840 views that would mean there’s 2840 people all sitting there doing the exact same thing for 20 minutes
@putsome basilonit every 60 seconds a minute passes in africa
I once actually tried to do well in BitLife. I was director of engineering, had a wife for over fifty years, made over a million dollars, had a few children, never committed a crime, had max stats at one moment (100% across the board), but then my character wouldn’t die...
A year or two before his death, he gets *falsely* accused of murder, pays max price to contest; it fails. Then in prison he appeals (max price again) IT *WoRkS*.
But then he’s left depressed, no money, everyone hates him, wife divorces him, then he dies a year later at the age of 120!
Wtf
He then gets called a jailbird, unsuccessful, waister, etc.
Wtf I’m never trying to do well again! Soz just had to vent
Ah yes, back to Kevin fecking everyones life over.
The best part of my day.
*Gets rejected*
*You no longer suffer from depression*
Its a fact that the human depression value maximum is 256, everyone is born with around 50-100 and it fluctuates from there (mostly rises). Everything aboce 200 is major depression ,but if you manage to get over 256 the system is overloaded and the depression value reverts back to 0. Your life wont be any better ,but youll stop caring
*DEPRESSION IS A NUMBER*
So that's why it doesn't bother me anymore....
That never happened.
Normally, you get depressed from that.
"no vaccinations please"
This is the most evil thing I have ever seen Kevin do
5 months later, its even more evil
the 'please' makes it even worse
"It helps filling the void, because of... not having a life" This film was posted on 8th Jan 2020. Little did he know, what shit was going to hit the fan in a mere few weeks.
As someone who knows dogs, I’m dying over Kevin naming a Lhasa Apso “Tank” 😂😂 IRL they’re just glorified mops
The beginning "It helps feel the void because, you know, not having a life" hits a month before the pandemic starts really different.
Thanks for bringing me a smile and genuinely making me laugh every day, Kevin! Keep doing your thing man :)
Feckin amazing
@@TheGreatDearLeaderJimPickens i bought yer feckin' dear leader poster now buy me a fucking pint
Kevin: Why is she having more success at having kids than me?
Also Kevin: *gives away both of his kids*
I LOVE HIM PLAYING BITLIFE!!
True, it's fantastic.
Shame the game itself sucks.
Oscar Kilby idk I love the game
@@scrublover0529 I found it super easy to do basically anything in it so there was no real challenge, as well as it being fairly limited without premium options
Kevin's Joke with a Side of His (Weird) Laugh always Crack me Up
Rtgame: spreads positive messages about 2020 and spreading awareness for the bad things
Kevin: ruins everybody else’s life
light bulb's gf : babe lets break up
light bulb : why babe, is it cause i yam 80 and you're 20?
his gf : no, its cause you eat with your mouth open.
Day 260 of wishing Kevin a happy birthday everyday.
Happy birthday, Kevin.
It brings bad luck
@@tatethetottle What is it that brings bad luck? If you were referring to me, that is absolutely correct, but otherwise, I'm not sure.
I can’t believe Kevin gets to have 260 birthdays
@@bananasinfrench *260 UNbirthdays
4:38 💚😆 obligatory spedicy shoutout
This has been one of my favourite series that you're doing and you posted this on my birthday so I'd just like to say thank you for making my day even better :)
Kevin, I don't have a quote or a timestamp, I just want to tell you how great you are. I see people all the time take for granted how much they help others around them, and how successful they really are. You're charming, funny, entertaining, and very talented. We love you Kevin.
“YES My WIFE IS DEAD”
"It's unusual, I'm usually the one starting the fire. But maybe I get paid on like how many fires I put out. Then I can just start loads of them."
I believe that is a hero complex, Kev. Only you won't be doing it for the sake of saving lives😂😂
I ALWAYS WANT MORE BITLIFE. THEY'RE MY FAVORITE VIDEOS.
Zoe Ann Jordan same. It’s games where he can basically do what he wants where he really shines.
@@dylannecros3636 100% agree
Kevin: Why is that so laggy?
My internet: lags suddenly.
That was the video.
Watching this I came across the related video regarding “Façade”. It was a golden one. Would love to see you bringing it back to explore... whatever the real objective of that game was. And variants. Just thinking at loud.
Thank you.
> commits crimes
> "why do I always end up in jail?"
I don't know why every word put in front of bulb makes me laugh, but I'll take it. Kevin's Bitlife videos are some of my favourites :')
6:15 girlfriends scream when getting rid of the dog but giving up the kids was fine
I love all of Kevin’s content always makes my day ❤️
I have to say, I love Kevin's subtle, savage digs at celebs XD
"I'm gonna be a golden boy until I can gather lots of kids, then I'll be bad."
P H R A S I N G
6:58 ah yes,
When grognak the destroyer and tank Dempsey team up, they become near unstoppable.
Unless it’s Kevin of course.
Dang, Kevin gets to ruin another life today 😂
Multiple lives*
Every single life*
Kevin: Dabs
Also Kevin:now I made myself sad :
Dude, I love how an 80 year old can still escape prison with ease.
"psychology or engineering, which one makes more money?"
*cries in psych major*
Lmao watching you play these made me download bitlife. You've ruined me, Kevin. 😂
Really digging the Sims 1 soundtrack playing in the background Kevin! *Italian chef kiss*
I'm pretty sure that Kevin is my spirit animal.
Thank you so much for making good content, you gave me twenty minutes of genuine happiness today
1:06, I literally have a small dog called Tank, we adopted him and that was the name his last owner gave him. He's such a lap dog XD
When you get a bitlife ad on bitlife video uploaded by the number 1 bitlife youtuber
Kevin looks handsome as heeelll today
At 14:51 your son 'Dick' that you abandoned was promoted to "Master Chief Petty Officer in the military!? Wow....That's amazing! (Also love the easter egg btw!)
Keep the Bitlife videos, they're fecking awesome!
"something went wrong somewhere along the line, I think it may have been the murdering."
no, it began with Light Bulb's birth, but close enough
when he named him Light, i immediately thought of Light Yagami lol
Day 17 of asking Kevin to play the GBA Sims games
Day 15 of telling Kevin he's very handsome
I know this will likely never be seen, but if Kevin is interested in starting fires, he should go back to "Sims 3" and play with the "Ambitions" pack. He can have a Sim become a fire fighter, and since the player controls that particular career, he could kill SO MANY Sims. :P