@narcabusecoach does this course help explain if the trauma bond has been broken? I am no contact with the family narcissists and felt like no contact was the only way to really break the trauma bond.
Yeah they are slick pieces of we all know what. It all falls apart when we realize what we’re dealing with. I just wish it didn’t take me over 40 years. My dad is one and my whole life I didn’t know what was wrong with me. Now I realize it was all his twisted mind games and nonstop gas lighting and put downs and never being good enough. They plot and use our kindness against us.
I have met a covert Narc last April. I believed he was an empath like me. I already knew about narcissistic abuse as years ago I was in a long-term marriage with one. He completely fooled me for 4 months. He ended up manipulating me through constant phone calls and attention to brainwash me to be his puppet. I let him because I assumed he was going through some hard times. Luckily for me, he overstepped my boundaries and tried to push me into something I was not willing to do. His goal was to move in with me and steal my resources. I said No and he got angry and went silent so I realized who he was and went silent too. Now 4 months later I have him blocked everywhere and have closed online accounts. I am finally feeling better. I had difficulty detaching from him even though it was only 4 months of communication without any physical involvement. I write this to let people know how good they are at pretending. I saw red flags but told myself it couldn't be because he was so very nice, caring, and adorable but all was lies upon lies and acting. In the end, he became threatening indicating to burn my property and so I was scared not sure what to do and that is why it took me 4 months to completely block him.
@@katerinanicolaou578 Thank you. I have learned my lesson. This person was a very successful athlete so not getting the attention, love, and admiration now that he is much older probably pushed him to the dark side. This is to show us that we can not live from our ego because the ego is the outside but we need to build our confidence and true self from the inside, our heart, and good will. Wishing you all the best in the New Year.
You are an angel for those who are suffering immensely in a narcisistic relationships. Thank you for your great service to mankind. God always bless you with every good thing in life.🙏
My dad used that rescue card and comparing other people's kids to us. Due to my mom walking out our lives when young. He always placed blame on her which caused anger issues for me and my siblings growing up. But later realizing she walked away from him. At numerous times I would always say, "no one forced you to have 8 kids" 🤨🤷🏾♀️. Now, God has blessed me to establish a relationship with my mom and seeing the truth. I'm so grateful for the knowledge on this channel. After growing up in so much unnecessary confusion in his delusions 🙏🏾
@carly106 it's only by the God's grace I'm still here. He didn't win, don't believe that lie. Narc parents get worse overtime. We actually won by cutting communication. We're free from being a slave to their delusions. They can't stand being alone. They are empty souls while we have the opportunity to know what true freedom feels like both mentally, spiritually, and physically. While they suffer from mental and physical torment by the very demons they chose to allow in.
My stepdad would bring up how clean his daughter was. He abandoned her when she was a toddler. When she came around in her early 20's, she was a full blown ho. Yeah. We never fell for it because we knew the story.
Yes, my mother did the same thing Danish - made everyone's problems or experiences about her. She always had to one-up everyone's stories. Absolutely could not resist that temptation!! She even hijacked my sister's cancer, was blatantly ignorant of my sister's situation other than how it affected herself. 😢
I was caught in a tornado on the interstate while talking to my dad on the phone. He cussed me out the whole time and of course, played the victim. Everything is about them. Then have to deal with everyone calling you up to cuss you out on his behalf then them all puffing their chests out like they just did something heroic. I can't decide if it is pathetic or slap stick comedy. Maybe a little of both? 🤔
Urgh yes I had the same thing, évery single time it was about him, when I felt bad he said “Yeah that sucks” but when he did feel bad I had to ask why en feel bad for him. I could cry my eyes out sometimes and he was sitting next to me watching tv, like nothing was going on .. What?!
Even though I am a man, I have seen ladies who suffered exactly as you put it and, I must admit, that conduct is outside my orbit of understanding such behavior. No matter how hard I try, I can't understand how any sane human being can abandon their lady partners (not necessarily a wife) who has undergone a difficult caesarian surgery in hospital. Imagine leaving you own baby with a helpless hurting (mind and body) woman. To me that is a form of murder. Simple!
The biggest sign of dealing with a covert narcissistic person is that they use (SUDDENLY) CRYING as a weapon & their most popular method, not for expressing emotions or empathy to you but definitely against you & for (emotional) manipulation of you. When they later ask you for a favor & you say NO to them, then they will suddenly say that they are great people who only cried "for you". Please know their "magic tricks", people.
In my experience with a covert friend, she made nearly *everything* about me. It took me years to realize that was her way of staying masked, gathering supply, and keeping me in an inferior position. She would offer me money again and again. When I finally took her up on it because I was in a desperate situation after sustaining disabling injuries, GAME ON. The covert jabs, backhanded "compliments", and manipulative attempts at hijacking my mind were unreal. Any attempt to address the issues and she would throw tantrums, whine, and blame-shift...how disrespectful I was after all she'd done for me! I spent years attempting to finesse her ego and distance the relationship so that we could remain friends without me having to endure such toxic dynamics. Years later when she finally decided to "address" our distance, it was a theatric devaluation and discard--I was a horrible person who took advantage of her. She would show me by ending the relationship! It was pretty clear that she had convinced herself I wouldn't be able to make it without her. That was five years ago. Needless to say, I have had a very peaceful and productive five years :)
@@pv5183 Sure, I'm glad if it's helpful. It's true about platonic friends! Thanks for reminding me. I still experience guilt about how much support she gave me--so, so confusing.
Yes, there’s a definite difference in the ENERGY of the narc vs empath. Whenever I have interacted with narcs I feel depleted of my positive energy, I feel awkward and sometimes jittery. That is the exact opposite feeling to interacting with a true empath. The empath literally recharges you with love, light, and positivity. It uplifts you instead of depleting you.
This video explains it all and contrasts the covert narc with empath. Weaponization makes me feel weak and humiliated. Gut feelings can help understand if the person is covert or empath!❤
If they become enraged when you state you need to trust your intuition more then you know they are a covert narc. That would only "offend" and "upset" a narc.
@dakoderii4221 it became so bad in the end that I eventually became a "mute". Terrible isolation and eventually discard and alienation from all my family. Narcissists playing against eachother. I'm no contact with all of them, and it's easier, but unfair. I never thought narcs were that way their whole life, so awful.
He mirror everything what I do. Even he tries to out shine everything I am good at. Except one thing and that is care. If I scream he screams, if I cry he cries, if I handle a situation in a way he does exact same things. But when it comes to care he ensure that I understand what he is not mimicking my care.
Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I got to know about my narc husband bad ways when I reach out to a private detective digitalinvestigate@gmail. com for help he did a perfect work for me I can see everything he’s doing on his device.
There is so much to ponder, in this session. It reminds me of the "sweet talking" covert narcissist man I spent awhile getting to know ...and how the onion layers of supposed " caring niceness" come off - peel by peel - over time, and then my " gut " knew that nothing ( very little) was about me or truly caring about me, but rather a way to pull my attention back to him [ like letting out his yoyo toy to me on the string & I hold) appreciate the " care/support/understanding " he shows... But immediately if he sees my face "appreciating HIM " ( he got his "supply" from me) then it is well " OK then, time's Over " & he Yanks on the yoyo string & whoosh .. the "attention yoyo" is back in his hand again & it is "Always ALL about Wonderful ME" again🎉.
Sir no one can explain covert narcissism better than you .....when we truly love someone and get deeply hurt by him or her, we go deeper and deeper to find its reasons.....I guess these painful experiences with your mother have made you the person who understands this topic the most.....Have a wonderful year ahead...🙏
i really enjoy your videos on the subject from both psychological and spiritual perspective, i think you are right! i notice feeling some ways of a covert narcissist sometimes, i hope these kind of feelings cease in time as i observe and decide, but sometimes i still manage to act out of that energy and it is painfuly shameful to find myself witnessing. i thank you! for showing what narcissism looks like, it is a very interesting and insightful subject, if you ever come to Estonia then you dont have to look for a hotel 🙂
I'm exactly like that. So let me correct you why we make everything about ourselves. When a friend approach me with his problem i'm listening but I dont really feel any compasion or understanding of how he feels. I just dont have empathy. But of course he still expect me to relate to it so the ONLY way for me to get how he feels is to bring up a story of mine when a similar thing happened to me. In that moment I finally remind to myself of how I felt in that moment, then I take that feeling and apply it on him. For me its the only way to relate with others - I have to create relatable feeling in myself first. Sure for outside world it can look like im making everything about myself but behind it isnt really a need for supply its just a sincere attempt to put myself in the other person shoes and relate to him.
I understand exactly what you're saying. I am the same. I am wanting to change that behavior bc sharing too much personal with wrong people is one of my downfalls. The Narc uses it against us later. I will be praying about this. Thank you for your sharing! ❤
Covert narcs are like the “nice guys” who are just as damaging as toxic men but they deny it so they gaslight their close ones and expect others to act in accordance to what they think.
🙏Thank you Danish! I needed to know this as I had a relationship with a narcissist and he pressured me into doing things his way and I was very scared to say no, he would go into rage.
He is making me very tired sir He starts from the beginning blaming me ...blaming me He is very clearly speaking like a mad man ... I lost all my hopes today with him ... He will never change ... what a fate to me .... He needs me ...he rejects me
Wow!! Your deep wisdom is greatly appreciated! I am humbled and convicted by these words. Also, I rejoice for the Revelation from God through you, Danish!! Thank you for sharing your gifts from God with us. This really is helping me heal, and I will be listening to this several times, and I will share it too. ❤❤❤
Here he would always say as I sat and cried and told him my pain, his reply was, well there are many times I did do this for you. Or on a scale of one to ten how do you think I’m doing now. Made it all about him
When the empath has a win, the covert will say "Aren't you glad we did so well", or "Aren't you happy I helped with that?" Its a permanent mirror they are holding up, where your light is useful to see their amazingNESS...:)
yes, an empath asks a lot of questions and wants to know to resolve and the betterment overall, but a CN is not interested, does not want to know nor understand.
Do you think CN never ask a lot of questions? CN asks a lot of questions more than people with high empathy. We need to know what questions can be asked, when, in what situations the questions can be asked. CN will start yelling when asking the questions, especially when they need you when they don't know how to resolve it alone. They also keep asking you questions and will insist you to answer the question in an inappropriate situation. You will get irritated when them ask you a question because at that time the situation isn't right to ask the questions. In some situations (especially involving you and you really need them), they're not really interested don't want to know nor understand. But when they are afraid of their image being looked at badly, they try to pretend to be interested in caring even though they don't want to care and understand.
8:30 & 13:00 strangest thing is he had me falling for him, hook, line and sinker. For 6 months of nightly phone calls, he was my emotional rock. But then in person he got so triggered and jealous, he used all my intimate secrets against me without any remorse. What a lunatic.😢 so confusing. How did he fake it like that for so long?
My husband would pout and complain that if my family knew I did this or that they’d look down on him. So I felt bad and said I would say we worked on it together. Then he would say that wasn’t enough because they’d wonder why I had to do anything. Basically, I had to tell everyone that he was doing the things that I was doing so he’d look good.
Covert narcissist ,I have seen they very critical in observation,quiet ,as you said Danish ,they tell there own sufferings ,I used to go to office and just before leaving doesn't care I was getting late started story about sufferings....empath doesn't doesn't that ,empath always put them in others shoes.Covert narcissists are extremely jealous, money centric, have obsession like cleaning etc,we can find them showing extreme self pity and yes ,very competitive and copycats.... They hard to detect
Empaths have incredible decrement. We know the minute something sounds or feels off but because we want to take people at face value and believe they are who they portray themselves to be, we continue moving forward with the the relationship when our intuition knows better. I learned about the depths of narcissism a year and a half ago and looking back at all my friendships and relationships they were all coverts mirroring my good nature but they always revealed themselves with subtle inconsistencies that spoke volumes but I dismissed as odd or quirky behavior. 2025 will be the year of recognizing toxic RAPIDLY and the cut off will be strong!
If I learned ONE thing in life about my mother, then that I cannot trust her - especially when in need of help and support because you might be ill or in pain. My mother is an expert when it come to vomiting words but lacking action. That´s why last time I told her that I would not need her help and that friends would take care of me. Boy, she was really pissed off and vomited even more words. However, I did not listen any longer. Waste of time and energy. And yes, I do know those phrases too, when I was too little to understand or stand up for myself: I have done everything just for you so you would have a good childhood. (Topic separation, now, she betrayed my father so, who is the one to blame for in this case?) However, don´t go there anymore just smirk and think, what a sad life you had, dear mother....
Honestly I'd like to know the answer too, trying to help my grandmother right now but she also does the "listen to you to talk about themselves and become the biggest victim in the room" thing.
You could do a whole video on listening skills - listening to be heard, or listening for the pause in the conversation... What you were saying here, I've heard so many times - personally and through my own clients. Thank you Danish. Oh, and hoping that 2025 is going to be good for you.
🎉Happy New Year, Danish. Thank you for Everything & may God 🙏 bless you & those you love in Every Way😊. He loves you empathetically in every way & knows your ❤heart. You are helping so many to really understand & " see " what is happening=the truth= in their life & in those living around them. We seek Truth & Peace & real "Abundant" LIFE * in 2025🎉 (* like Jesus shows me thru your teaching. T.Y )
I am married to a covert narcissist. I really never was able to put a label on this personality until recently. We have been together for almost 45 years. This person has not aged well. Their gradual loss of hearing has amplified their negativity and their presumption that they are to be waited on. I ignore a great deal of this behavior. I refuse to sit and listen and to the “I this and I that”, one sided conversation.
I was married to one for 25 years and divorced him, but it still took me another 11 years to learn the terminology covert narcissist and finally everything made sense!
Danish, i am just wondering... overt and covert narcissism i understand, i am the only empath in my family. 30years ago when i first came across the information it was taught codependants are the flip side to the narcissist because they are on the same coin. They attract one another and can be connected for years. Whereas the empath wont last anymore than 6months with a narcissist. I would call a codependant a Sympath. Are they now categorizing codependants as empaths? Back then only a small portion were seen as empaths something like 1% or .01%. Some people have empaths catergorized under 10 different types. I can scroll down the comments or interact with people and almost immediately can identify narcissist, sympath/codependant, or empath. Has the title codependant being done away with? No one seems to be talking about codependants anymore. Why is that? Thankyou so much for your content. ❤
What sets them apart from an empath? The smirk The sneer ⬆️⬆️⬆️ These two demoralizing and horrific facial expressions always show up eventually. Sneakily at first. You’ll think it’s your imagination because it’ll be very fleeting; you’ll barely catch it. But then one day you see it with full force and you can’t unsee it after that. Do yourself a huge favor and the very first time you see it with no ambiguity whatsoever please run, do not walk, to the nearest exit and do not pass go! You will regret it mightily if you do anything other than that when that inevitable smirk and/or that sneer arrive on the scene… Ask me how I know 😢 #RealTalk
is weapenisation always wrong ?sometimes when you feel you dont have anything else to defend, then make one remember, it can feel as a defense trying to change the situation. , what do you think ?
How to differentiate empath vs. narcissist? Listen to your gut, lol! But if you're an empath you probably got boundry issues and may not know how to listen to your gut yet. If it comes to blows, it's going to be the empath that eventually burries the narcissist in a hole in desert (figurative or for real).
For me is empathy hypocrite! Who is real Good Heart person, he is empathy but can say no, stop behave bad way. Many empaths support behavior of narcissist. To be empathic doesn't mean it is good way. Good way is to be righteous...many empaths are not
Hi,its me again,sorry for those many comments but I feel like I become crazy,btw was does that mean if you give a comment a heart? And one question if you got leaved by someone and you are a sensible person so you tell them when something bothrrs you eben after the end if friendship because xou are trying to heal but they act amoyed woth me talkkng to them but if I give up talking about something or I just typed byee instead if a long byee thus person say it was hurtful and mot nice and I dont know and I feel like this person is either makinf fun of me or really feels hurt,ofcourse I saud sorry The weird thing is this person wasnt sad around our mutal friend or told our mutam friend that the friendship ended and didnt mention me once ,meanwhile I told our mutaö friend that and what happened
Sir ap kun nahi video banatay video narc husband py co parenting with narc husband financially depended on them plz sir its a humble request from Pakistan
agree with everything Danish, btw is yours the channel being smeared by Jaz from the Game Exposed, she is actively trying to destroy an Indian narc expert in her videos
Empathy is not righteousness! To be righteous is mean to say no narcissist. Many empaths are hypocrite and support narcissist behavior. And that's reason why Jesus Christ said : Salvation is not through works but faith and guidance through the Holy Spirit, Jesus Christ, who teaches us to say no and not feel guilty. To be righteous and not feel lonely and guilty. Only through these two aspects do we fall into the trap of the narcissist again. Ask Jesus Christ for guidance. The feeling of guilt will also go away when we realize that we can never be perfect, flawless and it is our nature. Man is born sinful. A narcissist tends to praise us and through our ego to wrap us around his finger and then turn the whole thing around and mop the floor with us. The one who praises us a lot and at the same time criticizes later sends the first signals that we have nothing to do there. Jesus Christ advises, confess your sins and follow me and I will give you rest.
I know u daily take about narcissistic abuse... But please why are you taking ur parents in here ..and also u trying to potry your parents in wrong manner... There will be some flaws in every one as no one are perfect, u might have rude parenting , it's not in the sense tht they hate you . Ur mean to ur parents , while talking something fishy about them won't you think it's because of them ur here , they struggled and they bought up u to here this ...ur the worst man ever, ur just ruining ur parents for the sake of content , even my parents act sometimes rude. .. there will be some personal problems in every house .. and they are kept to secret some times , actually most of the time in front of camera you play a victim card , before talking about parents, think about there sacrifice for you
Break The Trauma Bond With a Narcissist
www.emotionalabuserecovery.com/breaking-the-trauma-bond
@narcabusecoach does this course help explain if the trauma bond has been broken? I am no contact with the family narcissists and felt like no contact was the only way to really break the trauma bond.
There is someone spamming under comments for money
Thank you for reporting this dear @@Hopeishere77- here, take my money 💰
This is how I was deceived. He’s a covert. I’m an empath. He mirrored my empathy.
Exactly the same.
Me too 😢
Yes, she was my SIL, but it was the same thing.
Yeah they are slick pieces of we all know what. It all falls apart when we realize what we’re dealing with. I just wish it didn’t take me over 40 years. My dad is one and my whole life I didn’t know what was wrong with me. Now I realize it was all his twisted mind games and nonstop gas lighting and put downs and never being good enough. They plot and use our kindness against us.
Ditto. Better late than never
I have met a covert Narc last April. I believed he was an empath like me. I already knew about narcissistic abuse as years ago I was in a long-term marriage with one. He completely fooled me for 4 months. He ended up manipulating me through constant phone calls and attention to brainwash me to be his puppet. I let him because I assumed he was going through some hard times. Luckily for me, he overstepped my boundaries and tried to push me into something I was not willing to do. His goal was to move in with me and steal my resources. I said No and he got angry and went silent so I realized who he was and went silent too. Now 4 months later I have him blocked everywhere and have closed online accounts. I am finally feeling better. I had difficulty detaching from him even though it was only 4 months of communication without any physical involvement. I write this to let people know how good they are at pretending. I saw red flags but told myself it couldn't be because he was so very nice, caring, and adorable but all was lies upon lies and acting. In the end, he became threatening indicating to burn my property and so I was scared not sure what to do and that is why it took me 4 months to completely block him.
Awful so sorry you experienced this , they are pure evil and go along in life fooling everyone , well done for getting away from this demon
@@katerinanicolaou578 Thank you. I have learned my lesson. This person was a very successful athlete so not getting the attention, love, and admiration now that he is much older probably pushed him to the dark side. This is to show us that we can not live from our ego because the ego is the outside but we need to build our confidence and true self from the inside, our heart, and good will. Wishing you all the best in the New Year.
You are an angel for those who are suffering immensely in a narcisistic relationships. Thank you for your great service to mankind. God always bless you with every good thing in life.🙏
My dad used that rescue card and comparing other people's kids to us. Due to my mom walking out our lives when young. He always placed blame on her which caused anger issues for me and my siblings growing up. But later realizing she walked away from him. At numerous times I would always say, "no one forced you to have 8 kids" 🤨🤷🏾♀️. Now, God has blessed me to establish a relationship with my mom and seeing the truth. I'm so grateful for the knowledge on this channel. After growing up in so much unnecessary confusion in his delusions 🙏🏾
You are a rare child. My kid’s dad did the exact same thing although he abandoned them. I’m now kicked to the curb. He’s won. So unfair.
@carly106 it's only by the God's grace I'm still here. He didn't win, don't believe that lie. Narc parents get worse overtime. We actually won by cutting communication. We're free from being a slave to their delusions. They can't stand being alone. They are empty souls while we have the opportunity to know what true freedom feels like both mentally, spiritually, and physically. While they suffer from mental and physical torment by the very demons they chose to allow in.
My stepdad would bring up how clean his daughter was. He abandoned her when she was a toddler. When she came around in her early 20's, she was a full blown ho.
Yeah. We never fell for it because we knew the story.
Yes, my mother did the same thing Danish - made everyone's problems or experiences about her. She always had to one-up everyone's stories. Absolutely could not resist that temptation!! She even hijacked my sister's cancer, was blatantly ignorant of my sister's situation other than how it affected herself. 😢
Stay strong.
Everything was always about him. Every problem or feeling I had he switched to talk about himself.
I got the same experience with them. 🎯
I was caught in a tornado on the interstate while talking to my dad on the phone. He cussed me out the whole time and of course, played the victim. Everything is about them. Then have to deal with everyone calling you up to cuss you out on his behalf then them all puffing their chests out like they just did something heroic. I can't decide if it is pathetic or slap stick comedy. Maybe a little of both? 🤔
Urgh yes I had the same thing, évery single time it was about him, when I felt bad he said “Yeah that sucks” but when he did feel bad I had to ask why en feel bad for him.
I could cry my eyes out sometimes and he was sitting next to me watching tv, like nothing was going on .. What?!
Be careful trying to unmask a covert narcissist, they can be capable of extreme violence to keep their secret.
This is very true. I was caught off guard and experienced this 😢
@@voyagehome5810me too … devil in human form
Yep. Abel effectively unmasked Cain...
The truth comes out when you have surgery, and they are nowhere to be found or if you have a baby.❤ or if you have any issues whatsoever. ❤
Even though I am a man, I have seen ladies who suffered exactly as you put it and, I must admit, that conduct is outside my orbit of understanding such behavior. No matter how hard I try, I can't understand how any sane human being can abandon their lady partners (not necessarily a wife) who has undergone a difficult caesarian surgery in hospital. Imagine leaving you own baby with a helpless hurting (mind and body) woman. To me that is a form of murder. Simple!
The biggest sign of dealing with a covert narcissistic person is that they use (SUDDENLY) CRYING as a weapon & their most popular method, not for expressing emotions or empathy to you but definitely against you & for (emotional) manipulation of you. When they later ask you for a favor & you say NO to them, then they will suddenly say that they are great people who only cried "for you". Please know their "magic tricks", people.
In my experience with a covert friend, she made nearly *everything* about me. It took me years to realize that was her way of staying masked, gathering supply, and keeping me in an inferior position. She would offer me money again and again. When I finally took her up on it because I was in a desperate situation after sustaining disabling injuries, GAME ON. The covert jabs, backhanded "compliments", and manipulative attempts at hijacking my mind were unreal. Any attempt to address the issues and she would throw tantrums, whine, and blame-shift...how disrespectful I was after all she'd done for me! I spent years attempting to finesse her ego and distance the relationship so that we could remain friends without me having to endure such toxic dynamics. Years later when she finally decided to "address" our distance, it was a theatric devaluation and discard--I was a horrible person who took advantage of her. She would show me by ending the relationship! It was pretty clear that she had convinced herself I wouldn't be able to make it without her. That was five years ago. Needless to say, I have had a very peaceful and productive five years :)
Thanks for sharing. I feel like we don't talk about how toxic some platonic relationships can be. They can be just as damaging
@@pv5183 Sure, I'm glad if it's helpful. It's true about platonic friends! Thanks for reminding me. I still experience guilt about how much support she gave me--so, so confusing.
Yes, there’s a definite difference in the ENERGY of the narc vs empath. Whenever I have interacted with narcs I feel depleted of my positive energy, I feel awkward and sometimes jittery. That is the exact opposite feeling to interacting with a true empath. The empath literally recharges you with love, light, and positivity. It uplifts you instead of depleting you.
Happy New Year, Danish! So many of these covert narcissists out here! Here’s to healing in 2025 🎉
That smirk of the covert narcissist is a killer
You are one in a million Danish ❤
Ten, ten million ❤
thank you, have a happy new year!
This video explains it all and contrasts the covert narc with empath. Weaponization makes me feel weak and humiliated. Gut feelings can help understand if the person is covert or empath!❤
If they become enraged when you state you need to trust your intuition more then you know they are a covert narc. That would only "offend" and "upset" a narc.
@dakoderii4221 it became so bad in the end that I eventually became a "mute". Terrible isolation and eventually discard and alienation from all my family. Narcissists playing against eachother. I'm no contact with all of them, and it's easier, but unfair. I never thought narcs were that way their whole life, so awful.
He mirror everything what I do. Even he tries to out shine everything I am good at. Except one thing and that is care. If I scream he screams, if I cry he cries, if I handle a situation in a way he does exact same things. But when it comes to care he ensure that I understand what he is not mimicking my care.
Exactly: Covert Narcissist don't really listen. As soon as they get a chance they make it about themselves.
Danish...a very happy new year 🎉...may God bless you abundantly for helping us navigate through narcissistic relations
Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I got to know about my narc husband bad ways when I reach out to a private detective digitalinvestigate@gmail. com for help he did a perfect work for me I can see everything he’s doing on his device.
Let the healing begin, and continue.
What better prayer could be offered?!
Happy New Year to all, shine bright.
Thanks for all the insight.
Oh, oh, I always talk about my personal problem. Argh . I am an empath.. I now am learning to put up boundaries..
There is so much to ponder, in this session. It reminds me of the "sweet talking" covert narcissist man I spent awhile getting to know ...and how the onion layers of supposed " caring niceness" come off - peel by peel - over time, and then my " gut " knew that nothing ( very little) was about me or truly caring about me, but rather a way to pull my attention back to him [ like letting out his yoyo toy to me on the string & I hold) appreciate the " care/support/understanding " he shows... But immediately if he sees my face "appreciating HIM " ( he got his "supply" from me) then it is well " OK then, time's Over " & he Yanks on the yoyo string & whoosh .. the "attention yoyo" is back in his hand again & it is "Always ALL about Wonderful ME" again🎉.
Thank you for your excellent observations Danish. Happy New Year 😊
Danish I love and live for your narcissists reenactments they are so accurate! 😂😂😂👍🏾👏🏾💯🙏🏾
Sir no one can explain covert narcissism better than you .....when we truly love someone and get deeply hurt by him or her, we go deeper and deeper to find its reasons.....I guess these painful experiences with your mother have made you the person who understands this topic the most.....Have a wonderful year ahead...🙏
I agree. Danish explains narcissism the best. So clear & concisely.
He's our superhero!🦸🏼♀️✨
i really enjoy your videos on the subject from both psychological and spiritual perspective, i think you are right! i notice feeling some ways of a covert narcissist sometimes, i hope these kind of feelings cease in time as i observe and decide, but sometimes i still manage to act out of that energy and it is painfuly shameful to find myself witnessing. i thank you! for showing what narcissism looks like, it is a very interesting and insightful subject, if you ever come to Estonia then you dont have to look for a hotel 🙂
Thank you for the great insights as always Danish. Hope you have a Wonderful Day! Happy New Year 🎉🙏🏽❤️
I'm exactly like that. So let me correct you why we make everything about ourselves. When a friend approach me with his problem i'm listening but I dont really feel any compasion or understanding of how he feels. I just dont have empathy. But of course he still expect me to relate to it so the ONLY way for me to get how he feels is to bring up a story of mine when a similar thing happened to me. In that moment I finally remind to myself of how I felt in that moment, then I take that feeling and apply it on him. For me its the only way to relate with others - I have to create relatable feeling in myself first. Sure for outside world it can look like im making everything about myself but behind it isnt really a need for supply its just a sincere attempt to put myself in the other person shoes and relate to him.
I understand exactly what you're saying. I am the same. I am wanting to change that behavior bc sharing too much personal with wrong people is one of my downfalls. The Narc uses it against us later. I will be praying about this. Thank you for your sharing! ❤
I have experienced both kinds of narcissists, and they worked together.
Happy New Year Danish. Thank you for your light and wisdom. I am so thankful for you. 😇🙏❤️
Spot on! That's how it worked. At one point, he admitted that he sought out damsels in distress.
Covert narcs are like the “nice guys” who are just as damaging as toxic men but they deny it so they gaslight their close ones and expect others to act in accordance to what they think.
🙏Thank you Danish! I needed to know this as I had a relationship with a narcissist and he pressured me into doing things his way and I was very scared to say no, he would go into rage.
Wow, sooo on point my brother. You hit that nail right on the head
Happy New Year Danish! The best thing I did last year is subscribing to your channel. 🎉🎉🎉
He is making me very tired sir
He starts from the beginning
blaming me ...blaming me
He is very clearly speaking
like a mad man ...
I lost all my hopes today
with him ...
He will never change ...
what a fate to me ....
He needs me ...he rejects me
Wow!! Your deep wisdom is greatly appreciated! I am humbled and convicted by these words. Also, I rejoice for the Revelation from God through you, Danish!!
Thank you for sharing your gifts from God with us. This really is helping me heal, and I will be listening to this several times, and I will share it too.
❤❤❤
My mother is the same way. Thank u for your videos, I appreciate your sharing your experience and your research. ❤🎉happy new year
Thankyou. You are describing my mother
Your good. I love your videos. ❤ Thank you for the time and effort you put into them.
Here he would always say as I sat and cried and told him my pain, his reply was, well there are many times I did do this for you. Or on a scale of one to ten how do you think I’m doing now. Made it all about him
When the empath has a win, the covert will say "Aren't you glad we did so well", or "Aren't you happy I helped with that?" Its a permanent mirror they are holding up, where your light is useful to see their amazingNESS...:)
yes, an empath asks a lot of questions and wants to know to resolve and the betterment overall, but a CN is not interested, does not want to know nor understand.
Do you think CN never ask a lot of questions? CN asks a lot of questions more than people with high empathy. We need to know what questions can be asked, when, in what situations the questions can be asked. CN will start yelling when asking the questions, especially when they need you when they don't know how to resolve it alone. They also keep asking you questions and will insist you to answer the question in an inappropriate situation. You will get irritated when them ask you a question because at that time the situation isn't right to ask the questions.
In some situations (especially involving you and you really need them), they're not really interested don't want to know nor understand. But when they are afraid of their image being looked at badly, they try to pretend to be interested in caring even though they don't want to care and understand.
This is my mother, ex friend, grandma
8:30 & 13:00 strangest thing is he had me falling for him, hook, line and sinker. For 6 months of nightly phone calls, he was my emotional rock. But then in person he got so triggered and jealous, he used all my intimate secrets against me without any remorse. What a lunatic.😢 so confusing. How did he fake it like that for so long?
My husband would pout and complain that if my family knew I did this or that they’d look down on him. So I felt bad and said I would say we worked on it together. Then he would say that wasn’t enough because they’d wonder why I had to do anything. Basically, I had to tell everyone that he was doing the things that I was doing so he’d look good.
Covert narcissist ,I have seen they very critical in observation,quiet ,as you said Danish ,they tell there own sufferings ,I used to go to office and just before leaving doesn't care I was getting late started story about sufferings....empath doesn't doesn't that ,empath always put them in others shoes.Covert narcissists are extremely jealous, money centric, have obsession like cleaning etc,we can find them showing extreme self pity and yes ,very competitive and copycats.... They hard to detect
I heard the whole "you shouldn't devalue the compliments like it's no big deal as it's not how to be humble"
This one really resonated with me as you share your own experience. Thank you and happy new year!
Happy new year, everyone!
Excellent points.
Just close the door and go away ín silent. Not only me i lost them, they will lost Me! 😉😇
Empaths have incredible decrement. We know the minute something sounds or feels off but because we want to take people at face value and believe they are who they portray themselves to be, we continue moving forward with the the relationship when our intuition knows better.
I learned about the depths of narcissism a year and a half ago and looking back at all my friendships and relationships they were all coverts mirroring my good nature but they always revealed themselves with subtle inconsistencies that spoke volumes but I dismissed as odd or quirky behavior. 2025 will be the year of recognizing toxic RAPIDLY and the cut off will be strong!
Happy new year!
Very, Very Spot On!
Danish I'm your big fan from India.
I want to tell you one thing Happy 🎊 new year 2025 enjoy it.
If I learned ONE thing in life about my mother, then that I cannot trust her - especially when in need of help and support because you might be ill or in pain. My mother is an expert when it come to vomiting words but lacking action. That´s why last time I told her that I would not need her help and that friends would take care of me. Boy, she was really pissed off and vomited even more words. However, I did not listen any longer. Waste of time and energy. And yes, I do know those phrases too, when I was too little to understand or stand up for myself: I have done everything just for you so you would have a good childhood. (Topic separation, now, she betrayed my father so, who is the one to blame for in this case?) However, don´t go there anymore just smirk and think, what a sad life you had, dear mother....
What if the empath tries to save a victim of narcissism and receive from that victim only withdrawaland gaslighting. What shoul that empath do?
Honestly I'd like to know the answer too, trying to help my grandmother right now but she also does the "listen to you to talk about themselves and become the biggest victim in the room" thing.
Are all parties narcisstic? In some cases, it seems to me they work in tandem. Is this "gang-stalking", demon gang-stalking? 😅
You could do a whole video on listening skills - listening to be heard, or listening for the pause in the conversation...
What you were saying here, I've heard so many times - personally and through my own clients.
Thank you Danish. Oh, and hoping that 2025 is going to be good for you.
I don't remember my mother being nice to me ever
Ditto! Narc aren't ever REALLY nice though. There's always an agenda leading back to them!
Im here again... he is exactly what you say 😮
Narcissism is an epidemic.
So true.
My mother in law says the same dialogues
I couldnt sleep
All her probelms her situations on the forefront
🎉Happy New Year, Danish. Thank you for Everything & may God 🙏 bless you & those you love in Every Way😊. He loves you empathetically in every way & knows your ❤heart. You are helping so many to really understand & " see " what is happening=the truth= in their life & in those living around them. We seek Truth & Peace & real "Abundant" LIFE * in 2025🎉 (* like Jesus shows me thru your teaching. T.Y )
Wow, yes
I am married to a covert narcissist. I really never was able to put a label on this personality until recently. We have been together for almost 45 years. This person has not aged well. Their gradual loss of hearing has amplified their negativity and their presumption that they are to be waited on. I ignore a great deal of this behavior. I refuse to sit and listen and to the “I this and I that”, one sided conversation.
I was married to one for 25 years and divorced him, but it still took me another 11 years to learn the terminology covert narcissist and finally everything made sense!
Danish, i am just wondering... overt and covert narcissism i understand, i am the only empath in my family. 30years ago when i first came across the information it was taught codependants are the flip side to the narcissist because they are on the same coin. They attract one another and can be connected for years. Whereas the empath wont last anymore than 6months with a narcissist. I would call a codependant a Sympath. Are they now categorizing codependants as empaths? Back then only a small portion were seen as empaths something like 1% or .01%. Some people have empaths catergorized under 10 different types. I can scroll down the comments or interact with people and almost immediately can identify narcissist, sympath/codependant, or empath. Has the title codependant being done away with? No one seems to be talking about codependants anymore. Why is that?
Thankyou so much for your content. ❤
My ex husband was covert, he is horrible human being
What sets them apart from an empath?
The smirk
The sneer
⬆️⬆️⬆️ These two demoralizing and horrific facial expressions always show up eventually. Sneakily at first. You’ll think it’s your imagination because it’ll be very fleeting; you’ll barely catch it. But then one day you see it with full force and you can’t unsee it after that.
Do yourself a huge favor and the very first time you see it with no ambiguity whatsoever please run, do not walk, to the nearest exit and do not pass go! You will regret it mightily if you do anything other than that when that inevitable smirk and/or that sneer arrive on the scene…
Ask me how I know 😢
#RealTalk
That's how i became a villain, because i never i gave in to narcissist or a covert narcissist. I smell the trick. I smell the betrayal
Rescue, obligation then guilt
I am so thankful full for you! I am realizing the damage I could feel but didn't understand and couldn't say how bad I feel. Thankyou.
is weapenisation always wrong ?sometimes when you feel you dont have anything else to defend, then make one remember, it can feel as a defense trying to change the situation. , what do you think ?
How to differentiate empath vs. narcissist? Listen to your gut, lol! But if you're an empath you probably got boundry issues and may not know how to listen to your gut yet. If it comes to blows, it's going to be the empath that eventually burries the narcissist in a hole in desert (figurative or for real).
they dont sacrifice theirselves or your personal issues or material things...theres no true delivery.
What's an Empath?
For me is empathy hypocrite!
Who is real Good Heart person, he is empathy but can say no, stop behave bad way.
Many empaths support behavior of narcissist.
To be empathic doesn't mean it is good way.
Good way is to be righteous...many empaths are not
My mother played with my health growth psyche emotions al in the name of God and religion,
Yep.
Hi,its me again,sorry for those many comments but I feel like I become crazy,btw was does that mean if you give a comment a heart?
And one question if you got leaved by someone and you are a sensible person so you tell them when something bothrrs you eben after the end if friendship because xou are trying to heal but they act amoyed woth me talkkng to them but if I give up talking about something or I just typed byee instead if a long byee thus person say it was hurtful and mot nice and I dont know and I feel like this person is either makinf fun of me or really feels hurt,ofcourse I saud sorry
The weird thing is this person wasnt sad around our mutal friend or told our mutam friend that the friendship ended and didnt mention me once ,meanwhile I told our mutaö friend that and what happened
Your mom and my mom must have the same cook book (narc playbook )
Sir ap kun nahi video banatay video narc husband py co parenting with narc husband financially depended on them plz sir its a humble request from Pakistan
I just laugh at mind 😂😂😂😂 he was stunts 😮😢hahah😅
Covert narscissist are good by mimmicking your behaviour.
agree with everything Danish, btw is yours the channel being smeared by Jaz from the Game Exposed, she is actively trying to destroy an Indian narc expert in her videos
You know because you're the empath
Empathy is not righteousness!
To be righteous is mean to say no narcissist.
Many empaths are hypocrite and support narcissist behavior.
And that's reason why Jesus Christ said : Salvation is not through works but faith and guidance through the Holy Spirit, Jesus Christ, who teaches us to say no and not feel guilty. To be righteous and not feel lonely and guilty. Only through these two aspects do we fall into the trap of the narcissist again. Ask Jesus Christ for guidance.
The feeling of guilt will also go away when we realize that we can never be perfect, flawless and it is our nature. Man is born sinful. A narcissist tends to praise us and through our ego to wrap us around his finger and then turn the whole thing around and mop the floor with us. The one who praises us a lot and at the same time criticizes later sends the first signals that we have nothing to do there. Jesus Christ advises, confess your sins and follow me and I will give you rest.
I know u daily take about narcissistic abuse... But please why are you taking ur parents in here ..and also u trying to potry your parents in wrong manner... There will be some flaws in every one as no one are perfect, u might have rude parenting , it's not in the sense tht they hate you . Ur mean to ur parents , while talking something fishy about them won't you think it's because of them ur here , they struggled and they bought up u to here this ...ur the worst man ever, ur just ruining ur parents for the sake of content , even my parents act sometimes rude. .. there will be some personal problems in every house .. and they are kept to secret some times , actually most of the time in front of camera you play a victim card , before talking about parents, think about there sacrifice for you
My mother and wife both are covert one,the layer of abuse is so thin and unclear to be identified as abuse.suttle
It’s insidious abuse. Hidden but just as effective as open abuse.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Best wishes brother. A Very Happy New Year 🎊