Hilary, thank you for your empowering message, especially the narcissists part. I struggled with that for long and when I realized that I should focus, study and understand my behavior, codependency.....everything changed and the healing journey made more sense. You have a new subscriber. Much love from Rwanda.
I absolutely love this video! As someone who grew up in an abusive household, I could not change the fact that I was born with an abusive mother but what I absolutely have full control over and can change who I chose to have a relationship with in future. By accepting the fact that despite my upbringing it is absolutely my responsibility to learn to protect myself from abusive individuals I may meet in future and have to unlearn all the ways I may attract or make myself a target to abusive individuals it will ensure I can one day build a better future for myself and have healthy relationships so that I never get stuck in the same toxic cycle I had with my parent again! If i did not learn this sooner, I most likely would of fell into the trap of getting into another toxic relationship and would of told myself that I am simply a victim of abuse because I grew up in abusive environment which although true is certainly not a mindset that is going to help me get out of unhealthy relationships, stay out of them or allow me to realise how I may be allowing myself to become a victim to this sort of dynamic because I never took responsibility for the fact that I despite the fact that my childhood circumstances might of set me up for failure I am responsible for learning how to guard and protect myself from unhealthy relationships in my life. Point being, great advice you gave in the video, especially for people coming out of toxic relationships!
My life changed for the better as I started to realize that no one was coming to save me, and that I am very capable of saving myself, and worth saving.
Jules, that’s such a powerful realization-bravo to you for embracing it! 💪 You’re absolutely worth saving, and taking charge of your own life is the most empowering thing we can do. Thank you for sharing this; it’s inspiring!
There are so many thoughtless people out there ...w no desire to be decent to those who value being decent. When someone has too much to accomplish, its like No one recognizes the Weight of maintaining that life. No recognition for the efforts is hard to take. I had boundaries to ensure my balance. Bf didnt believe it mattered. Broke up and kept my balance. Gaining support often means doing things very quickly and setting aside my needs. Its taxing and doesnt Add up. It doesnt help me to Lose my autonomy..be manipulated to Have a "person" around. No thanks!!
There are some people with balance.. Ask them what they do to keep firm boundaries . Their time is valuable. Its essential to show them you have organized your questions, are intentional about showing up. They need to tell you what they changed..with specific proof. You cant accept Theories and vague talk about their life being Better. You have to see their system and Inquire about it in depth.
I like your ideas in other videos but this seems like an odd oversimplification of what most of these posts are actually sharing. I mean, some people have narcissistic parents and I don’t think they’ve “decided” or “contributed to” that dynamic, and learning about their own experience and having a way to define it - at least through an initial healing period, considering what abuse tends to do to the way we think of ourselves- can help give someone an appropriate level of anger and even entitlement to reclaim their own identity, etc.
Have you ever received harmful advice from someone you trusted? 🤔💬 Share your experience in the comments!
Hilary, thank you for your empowering message, especially the narcissists part. I struggled with that for long and when I realized that I should focus, study and understand my behavior, codependency.....everything changed and the healing journey made more sense. You have a new subscriber. Much love from Rwanda.
@@FrancoiseRudahunga 🙏🙏❤️❤️
So good! Thank you! ❤
I am a therapist in California and I totally agree with all of your points!
@@jillpesavento9969 ❤️
I absolutely love this video! As someone who grew up in an abusive household, I could not change the fact that I was born with an abusive mother but what I absolutely have full control over and can change who I chose to have a relationship with in future. By accepting the fact that despite my upbringing it is absolutely my responsibility to learn to protect myself from abusive individuals I may meet in future and have to unlearn all the ways I may attract or make myself a target to abusive individuals it will ensure I can one day build a better future for myself and have healthy relationships so that I never get stuck in the same toxic cycle I had with my parent again! If i did not learn this sooner, I most likely would of fell into the trap of getting into another toxic relationship and would of told myself that I am simply a victim of abuse because I grew up in abusive environment which although true is certainly not a mindset that is going to help me get out of unhealthy relationships, stay out of them or allow me to realise how I may be allowing myself to become a victim to this sort of dynamic because I never took responsibility for the fact that I despite the fact that my childhood circumstances might of set me up for failure I am responsible for learning how to guard and protect myself from unhealthy relationships in my life. Point being, great advice you gave in the video, especially for people coming out of toxic relationships!
❤❤❤
Great post. It is true.
Take total and complete responsibility for your life. It is the only way to live.
Yesss!! ❤
My life changed for the better as I started to realize that no one was coming to save me, and that I am very capable of saving myself, and worth saving.
Jules, that’s such a powerful realization-bravo to you for embracing it! 💪 You’re absolutely worth saving, and taking charge of your own life is the most empowering thing we can do. Thank you for sharing this; it’s inspiring!
Great advice ❤
Excellent podcast!
@@TracyLemons-f5r thank you!! 🙏
There are so many thoughtless people out there ...w no desire to be decent to those who value being decent. When someone has too much to accomplish, its like No one recognizes the Weight of maintaining that life. No recognition for the efforts is hard to take. I had boundaries to ensure my balance. Bf didnt believe it mattered. Broke up and kept my balance. Gaining support often means doing things very quickly and setting aside my needs. Its taxing and doesnt Add up. It doesnt help me to Lose my autonomy..be manipulated to Have a "person" around. No thanks!!
Insightful video
There are some people with balance.. Ask them what they do to keep firm boundaries . Their time is valuable. Its essential to show them you have organized your questions, are intentional about showing up. They need to tell you what they changed..with specific proof. You cant accept Theories and vague talk about their life being Better. You have to see their system and Inquire about it in depth.
I like your ideas in other videos but this seems like an odd oversimplification of what most of these posts are actually sharing. I mean, some people have narcissistic parents and I don’t think they’ve “decided” or “contributed to” that dynamic, and learning about their own experience and having a way to define it - at least through an initial healing period, considering what abuse tends to do to the way we think of ourselves- can help give someone an appropriate level of anger and even entitlement to reclaim their own identity, etc.