Burnout,
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ก.ย. 2023
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Chelsea is joined by career expert and TH-camr Jennifer Brick to talk office politics, burnout, earning more, and what comes after the Girlboss era.
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A new study says that actually women have been negociating their salaries even more than men but are denied most of the time.
I asked for a raise after filling in positions for two coworkers who left, on top of my role. My boss gaslit me, saying, welcome to the actual working world. You have real work now.
I’m on a 2 month break now after burnout. My employer worked me to the bone. I grew up in a family that taught me to always say yes you all “opportunities” now I hate what I do and resent my employer for taking advantage of me.
i hear ya. i’m in month 3 now on FMLA for burn out, and i hear rumors that i will be getting let go once i return. i’m really anxious about it
What are you doing for insurance during this time?
I always have 3-6month rent and bill money saved so I have the freedom to leave toxic environments. I’m living on that now until I start the job hunt again soon. I’m only going for roles that are 4 days.
This is why i start slow and slowly build up to speeds that im comfortable with. I tried the work hard for promotion route last 2 jobs but even after 3 years at job 1, i got 5k increase total no promotion which was always pushed to next year until im laid off. Second employer kept work pace steady but despite inflation increasing like crazy employer didn't increase my pay by much. Every time im changing job im increasing my pay by 25 to 50%. But employers want loyal employees on paper.
Unpaid overtime should be illegal.
I heard the problem isn't necessarily that women don't ask for a raise or negotiate, but that they do and are told no. I'd love a larger discussion of how to handle that dynamic, and all the variations thereof (whether you're told no upfront, but see other people starting at a higher salary, what to do after you're told "no raise," if you change teams within a company but still feel like you aren't being fairly compensated, etc.)
This was always my experience, I work in healthcare and every job offer has included the caveat that they don’t negotiate, rather your offer comes off a grid that HR has based on years of experience. It’s kind of a bummer.
Yes. Or got fired after negotiating. 🎉
It’s important to negotiate for myself but if a company says no to raise, I just use it as a sign to interview elsewhere. I’ve gotten significant raises before but no raise is comparable to when I went to another company. I usually channel the anger I get from being denied a raise to interviewing.
Facts. Every time I asked for more money they would tell me they couldn't. Meanwhile some dude got a 12% raise for setting up a SharePoint site that wasn't even published yet. Meanwhile another woman on the team, given a 2% raise, was running the SharePoint site that already existed for our team. She taught the dude how to code SharePoint so he could work on his project. It was NUTS. Of course, when we went to management about it they told us we shouldn't have pointed it out. Our poor bosses felt so betrayed.
This was me. My boss is a woman and she’s told me no twice so now I’m looking for other jobs or to create my own job and rather work 24/7 for myself. 😢
10:58 she forgot to say "OR, find ways outside of work to find fulfillment, because some people dont have many choices about what job they have, let alone choices about how they interact with their work."
yup, that's what i've circled around to. my mom always said she works as hard as she does so she has enough money to enjoy life and participate in things she's passionate about *outside* of work. changing my attitude so work didn't have to be fulfilling has been key to the success i've had as an independent adult so far (i'm 29). my priority now is maximizing income so i have money to live well outside of work.
You might not be able to be fired for speaking about pay, but some states are “at will,” meaning the employer can fire you without any reason at all, which is a way they can use to fire you for speaking about pay without technically firing you for speaking about pay.
Its not some states its pretty much all states except montana.
Most of this advice fits well with white collar work, but I think this channel has a bit of a blind spot when it comes to blue collar workers
Yes please bring more blue collar jobs
And publicly funded careers. We can’t negotiate salary.
I love Chelsea and TFD forever, but yes! This. My job is a state job...I can't negotiate. Hubby has a job in manufacturing. Also a very tight situation with totally different rules than most other industries.
@@amycampbell9453brown nose and spend some one on one sessions with people in power lol. But seriously, the best effort for public work is to keep the gig to work as little as possible while building a life outside the job. One my of neighbor is a lady working for canadian government. Her side hustle is real estate, a service ontario branch and lately she is opening a third business. And she uses her unlimited accruing holidays to spend time on her businesses and her job is a simple status requirement.
@@lamareneahjordan8660blue collar is simply going to work, do your job and then go home. You are generally paid hourly or per day and its up to you optimize work rate to maximize pay.
I faced burnout in my early 20s. My brain's defense mechanism was to forget; I barely remember specific bad things that happened during that period. I just remember myself crying in a bathroom when everybody in the office left. Tough years, but they made me stronger.
You disassociated. It’s a trauma response.
I had this happen in my early 20s too, major burnout followed by a nervous breakdown. Definitely made me stronger too, learned what not to tolerate in a workplace/employer.
unresolved trauma doesn't usually make people stronger, just more tolerant of mistreatment.
(Obviously, I don't know if thats the case for you, just that mental health research and personal experience suggest that's usually the case.)
So much of the advice does not apply to academia, and to people who are restricted by work visas. The burnout experienced by people on work visas, many unable to find a job, if you find a job, being unable to switch industries or even functions within industries, is on another level. We also don’t hold much power within our organizations and deal with immense imposter syndrome in spite of being talented and overachievers. Wish more career advice folks addressed these demographics.
💯
In my field the crappy companies prefer to hire people on work visas because those employees can be exploited more easily 😢
@@ourgardenkitchen yeah, it’s similar in academia
Omg yes I was a very A/A+ student and Ive been treating my career like school work, it's really killing me.
Facing burnout rn, was so glad to see this in my feed!
I just quit my job and no I don’t have a back up yet. I do have interviews. I worked for hospice and I loved it. I was a nurse assistant so I made less then anyone working there. It came down to not being appreciated. I was driving the most I was spending about $1,000 a month on gas alone not counting the up keeping of my car. I told my boss and he kind of brushed it off more then once. When I put my notice he seemed clueless and blindsided of why I was quitting. He offered me more money and mileage but I honestly was done begging and I took an a loss and hope to find something
What you were doing was so valuable and yet the pay does not compute for the value. Thank you for the work you have done, and I wish you the most amazing new opportunity.
Best of luck lovely!! Onward and upward!
Ive had burnout for several years and am only now beginning to recover. Its rough and most people ignore the emotional compontents. They say its a lack of discipline or willpower
Finally, a great guest with excellent dialogue and expertise
Finally? She's always had pretty good guests.
I’ve been working since January and I’m tired of going to work,getting scolded like a 5 year old,never appreciated for all the good I do and when I go above and beyond for them. Im also sick & tired of my job to be honest and looking at using my underpaid salary to work on my side hustle and make it my full time job.
I feel like some of the content on this channel is leaning towards "perpetually online" vibes. I don't think we think of ourselves as former "girlbosses" or living a soft life and the stay at home girlfriend thing is really just an internet joke and not a serious thing that people are aspiring towards. We're just living our lives, trying to get promoted/not get fired, and being able to pay our bills.
My thoughts too. I don't know any young person who aspires to be a stay at home girlfriend with no responsibilities. That's a Tik Tok trend.
Burnout is gonna strike it huge in healthcare as so many medical people are into financial responsibility and planning, probably in 5-10 years there’s gonna be a massive resignation of healthcare professionals.
Its already started in some fields of healthcare
@@gangliaghost8720 I predict a whole army of millennial doctors are gonna just disappear (including me) cuz we weren’t fooled by luxuries, and the work is just way too terrible. Not to mention ptsd from residency. It’s one thing when finance and tech workers get financially responsible and take care of themselves. It’s another when countless communities lose doctors cuz we are all fed up.
@@shakenbacon-vm4eu no I agree wholeheartedly. The turnover rate when I was in behavioral healthcare was insane
@@gangliaghost8720 oh my goodness, I could only imagine how difficult that is, both the kinds of patients and the endless volume of patients and paperwork. I swear it takes either a saint or a luxury addict to stay in healthcare til you’re 65.
@@shakenbacon-vm4eu luxury? Lol many behavioral healthcare workers barely make a living wage, if even that
Feeling that “no name Canadian university” degree working in tech next to people with like MIT masters degrees very hard
This was fantastic. Quit my job of almost 5 years because of burnout stress and anxiety and I was hitting my head against a wall as to why I was never succeeding or being promoted but this has helped me realise a lot. Thank you so much. Subscribing to her channel!
B
Ok shes super knowledgeable. Thanks for having her on
I felt so seen by that comment about the two friends that loved yelling at each other lmao. I once lived in a house share with 2 Slavic women and their NORMAL conversations frequently went into yelling territory. That shit was very triggering for my Asian ass 🤣
Def feeling post grad burn out thank you for discussing it
The crossover I did not expect but am 100% here for
Ordered it! came at the perfect moment thanks guys. stay tuned. will run through and review when done.
This women you interviewed has the BeSt advice ever I am a long time fan and follower!:) love her x
I prefer the term “Vintage Millenial” and “Stay at home person” is hilarious 😂😂😂😂
Jennifer helped me get my current job position! Love her!
Thanks for sharing about Quility! 💚
both my parents have worked 80 hour weeks my entire life, and so do all the successful adults i know who don't have some source of independent wealth. the only friend i have who's bought a house works very, very long hours. we live in california where property is very expensive, but it seems like 80 hour weeks are the only way to be middle class here. i've adjusted so i pretty much don't like doing anything as much as i like working, but i think that's because i've been really, really poor and being poor involved a lot of suffering. seems like the choices are make work the center of your life, or suffer. i had to adjust so work didn't feel like suffering, and became kind of a workaholic, just like my parents.
Such a great convo!
The queen returns 🎉🎉🎉🎉
Ive been burned out since 2019
Wonderful guest! Loved this ep!
This made me feel so validated in all my career moves!
The cost of a degree in Canada has also gone up a lot since Jenn got her degree.
I wish you tagged Jennifer on the title of the video and also added her pic on the thumbnail. There is just no mention of her , and I wouldnt have known she was on the podcast if she hadnt emailed her newsletter list. So Sad.
Career Bestieeeee! What a crossover! ❤ 💐
I found that teachers are less concerned with the specific process of getting things done than most bosses. Bosses tend to micromanage while teachers just care about the end result.
2 of my favorite TH-camrs = great video
Great interview!
Jennifer Brick was an excellent guest 👌
Love the charcoal dress, Chelsea! 💖 🤗
Chelsea's hair looks awesome in this video!
I actually wish iphone lets us send texts at 8 or 9 or whatever just in case things happen at my clinic at 4 but it’s not an emergency or it’s just some courtesy/notification thing. Android has that function and i didn’t have to use whatsapp or whatever
Exactly, the game doesn't need to be a zero sum game
Jump scare thinking this interview was with Sophia Amoruso
"Chad never has anything going on" hit me so hard. I have a Chad in my office and the statement could not be more accurate 😂
Beware of the benefit structure in companies that seemingly incentives longevity with more PTO, etc., especially if you decided that you preferred doing the thing at a higher degree of proficiency rather than managing others in the task. Unless your skills are unique and mission-critical to the company, 50 percent of workers over 50 will lose long term jobs, usually as a cost cutting move re salaries/benefits. Have your own portable current credentials. Retraining with another round of grad school.
I just got fired for advocating for myself
Who is working 60-80 hours in the office? I get doctors are the exception. But the rest of us, we need to band together at the workplace and force the change you want. Im paid 40h and you will rarely catch me doing 1-2h on a super busy day. And i make that back when i started leaving 1-2h early every week.
Isn’t the 80 hour week a myth after all? I mean, it would be 16 h a day in case of 5 days a week, or like 12 hours work litterally every day. That’s just not possible.
@myshoppingrehab for most it is. But many people higher up or boomer mentality people work these hours. Also many immigrants who perpetuate toxic work culture from their home countries.
Wait I missed something. Which Girl Boss(es) is this about?
I’m always a little surprised at round endorsements of the book Conflict is not Abuse. I think the topic is worthy but I was really let down by the content of the book. I had all these questions and I felt like the author’s real focus was expressing defensiveness about specific scenarios from their own life where they created tension and discomfort for another person. Maybe they were right that what they did or said in several of these situations was ultimately fine or should be socially considered fine, but I found the defensive tone (at least from my perspective) off-putting, and I got frustrated waiting for the book to… like, care about other people who are not the author and who came to understand the main premise in a more broadly applicable way. I don’t have a perfect memory of the book, but I also recall thinking that it didn’t engage situations with significant inequality, where the conflict is more loaded or threatening to some of the participants than others. Given how many recommendations I’ve seen, I wish I had gotten more out of the book.
I’m young millennial. 28 years old!
How is Simon Fraser a no-name university?
Because she's speaking to an American audience who likely couldn't name a single Canadian university.
@@sarahwbsMcGill and McMaster come to mind right away offhand.
Honestly, I didn't know about Simon Fraser until I started working in education. And I'm Canadian. I don't mean to dunk on it, but it never came up before then.
🙄🙄🙄
@@Amy-abcshoutout to university of calgary.
this wasn't the most enby-inclusive episode , shall we say
I'm very much judging you for that plastic cup and straw I see in the background. We all need to stop that behavior, but I love your content. Keep it up! 🎉
Seriously?
@@pisceanbeauty2503right lol! Like get a life 😂
Are you okay?
@@denedennie1516 totally! Why do you ask?
@pisceanbeauty2503 Yes, I'm serious. I think the whole world should be working to do their part to heal the world however they can. To-go food and drinks are a serious problem.
Ladies, You wanted this.