Really liked what you said about "dating compassionately". I was in a relationship with someone who was choosing to be celibate until marriage and there came a point where I knew she was going to compromise that in the hope that we would end up married. But I also knew that I wasn't ready for marriage so the most compassionate thing I could do was to break off the relationship. I didn't want her to compromise her values for what might have been a false hope.
well done man, been there before, but the woman was lying to me, she was not really celibate but she wanted to project herself a certain way to me. I did not leave her because she claimed wanted to be celibate but because she was deceptive and manipulative in a lot of ways. That is one thing that is so off putting about entering the relationship mine field is that there is a lot of deception and manipulation involved.
@@Botyoutubeaccount I hear you man, I found me the right barber aged 18 and nearly 20 years later I'm still with him, but as I moved abroad we're no longer together. Bro, I taught myself how to cut my own hair and I can do it more or less as good as my own barber now so if you can't find the right barber, teach yourself how to do it yourself (there is a hidden metaphor in there, although the story is true)
Exactly, Alexandra.... HOW the hell are people even able to fuck with someone without emotions... and no, LUST is NOT an emotion… it's a catalyst that depends on actual love to fully work properly. If love and care are missing, it becomes unhealthy and damaging.
"Better to be lonely and real with yourself, than to be fake and be with someone who really doesn't want you." It hurts, be man ain't that the truth. I needed to hear that.
The guy “asking out” the Asian girl had the same energy as when I yelled to a boy across the playground that I liked him and he responded “sweet” in 2nd grade
It’s cause you’re fighting a battle on two fronts, you’re not trying to catch feels for the person and you’re hoping the person doesn’t catch feelings for you
Bless that girl's heart, she really needs to get outta that relationship. White shirt is using her for a self esteem boost because she can't get a guy to care that much for her. Blue shirt shouldn't just walk out of that, she needs to run
Bless that girl's heart, for real. First impressions off the video she is so cute and unfortunately for me, I have been in her position before as in trying to be with someone who leads me on but wants to keep it open. It's so hard. So awful! White shirt better have broken it off by now. She has to see how damaging this relationship is for jeans jacket homie.
That's why this arrangement, and more specifically normalizing this arrangement is bad. People go into this not wanting to be "lame", then it destroys them That's how you get a whole generation of miserable people with the inability to function properly in a committed relationship Now imagine what types of families they would create? The children raised in that would be just really bad
@@ang5798 of course it's bad. You don't choose who you fall in love with and you're consistently having sex with this person. You might be able to seperate sex from any feelings you might have from them as long as you got options and are capable of having sex with multiple people, but if you hit a drought or otherwise stop having sex with other people, you will in all likelihood get your wires crossed real quick.
@@danieldaw1778 you can't completely separate sex from the feelings, it's not possible, and even less for women than for men. It's like walking into fire and then crying because you're burning. Stop walking into fire, stop spreading fire, and start actively putting the fire down, otherwise it will eat you and your children And stop showing being eaten by fire as something normal that should be accepted as coexistence.
I love when someone uses their astrological sign as an explanation for their behavior or personality because then I know not to trust their line of reasoning. It's a massive red flag for me, even in friendships.
If we're honest your hurt and you think we're mean. If we're nice you think we playin games. Tf. If you're asking at that point. You shouldn't be dating for yourself. *Flies away*
When the girl said “use your words,” like her fwb is a child; gross. Can’t stand condescending people like that. That other girl needs to get out of there, real quick!
She doesn't care about her friend she just wants her for fun time and it's never gonna change it's sad that the blue jacket girl caught feelings and it's never gonna happen she needs to move on and start loving herself a bit more her self esteem seems low
Yup an ur right jean jacket girl needs to cut her off ASAP she is probably never going to love her the way she does but jean jacket girl might just b too in love
@@idipped2521 not always trashy...my bf "slid into my DMs" after a year of knowing each other and we started dating right away. For that year previous we weren't allowed to date each other (for reasons that I'd rather not explain). Shit just happens that way some times. I think it was sweet that he wanted me and even though during that year we dated other people we still had a thing for each other. Really just gods plan.
I don't understand why these people stick around with someone that's not willing to commit to the relationship the same way they are. Just leave, stop wasting your time.
Hope. It's a pretty damaging thing. Hope is what kept Blacks alive through slavery, but hope is also what keeps a woman fixing a plate of food for her estranged husband who walked out on her.
It's a severe lack of self esteem. They think they can't find another individual so they wait it out hoping for change. Now I'll say that you will change as you grow older, but some people don't want to wait that long
Mainly because it wasn't real. If your relationship is so fragile it can't last through an interview, you had bigger problems long before the exposure.
well commitment is more like emotional responsability and with a tattoo the only responsability you got is walking around with an ugly ass tattoo your whole life
I've been her. Holding on for whatever scrap of hope they give you because you like/love them so much. Makes you stop seeing things for what they are when your hope and desire is that high. Poor, delusional heart. I'm good now though. 😘
Poor girl :( I just want to hug her and tell it will be ok. EDIT: Also the Asian girl. I hope their relationship works out, but... I am not holding my breath.
Naw....apparently on her Instagram it was all a joke...they thought it would be funny to do....they are actually a couple🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️the adidas girl was receiving so much hate...and they said they were just llaying
@@nocommonsense8950 How much you wanna bet addias girl made up that story to stop the online hate she was receiving for acting like a garbage human on the internet....Those reactions were too genuine to be fake.
I got to remember the next time I get called out for playing someone as a fool to say that I'm a Libra, but I have the feeling it doesn't play out the same way for a hetero Latino male.
Thanks for the insight. I was the female in blue. I guess I wasn't emotionally responsible because I kept holding on to a dream. The F'd up part about it was that she was killed in an accident. I still carry around this endless love like an idiot but seeing this and hearing you somehow helped me to wake up. I can't keep pining after someone that is not only gone but was never really mine in the 1st place. Thanks for the reality check.
I'm so sorry to hear about all of that! I really hope you're doing well and that you've learned you're definitely NOT an idiot for feeling what it is that you have felt!
Literally me …my first love (4th grade, ik super young) ..I was told he committed suicide(I moved away so I didn’t know myself)…and I found out in 10th grade…that he was alive. But when I tried talking to him, he didn’t remember me at all. Turns out he’d been in a car accident and didn’t remember anything from that time, it apparently happened shortly after I had moved away…I definitely understand loving someone that’s not there and even loving someone that doesn’t even…remember anything you shared..no memories or anything. But what I’ve also learned is that it’s okay to love, and love hard…it means you have a big heart..but it also means you have to do your best to protect that big heart of yours. Not everyone will treat it with kindness or the delicacy that you need. It’s your greatest strength and weakness. I hope that you are doing well in your healing journey and I pray that you can find someone to love you properly but before you do so, be sure to love yourself first. 💜
@@sthoughtsarchive2791 Aba said he will fight anyone that doesn't comment and like because of the 8/10 prediction. "Don't want to catch those hands" = "don't want to fight"
Dude: "Do you love me?" Girl? "..................... Yes" Dude: "Do you want me to be your boyfriend?" Girl: "Would you want me to be your girlfriend?" Dude: "Yeah, let's do it" Girl: "Did you just ask me out? We're in a relationship!!" Me watching them: ".... Cool.... ..... this isn't going to last at all...."
@@musicfilmhead9051 Oh fuck no. I watched both and Cut is definitely the more cringe and PC obsessed of the two. At least Jubilee encourages both sides to hear each other out and isn't afraid to let non liberals speak their mind. Cut's viewers are full of close minded idiots. They're Buzzfeed lite.
An open relationship means you dont have a relationship... Your just a life vest thats making life easier in a cold sea, while she swims around trying to find a boat she wants to ride exclusively back to shore and keep at the dock..
8 is the number you use when it’s bad but you don’t wanna hurt her feelings, 9 is the number you use when it’s good but you don’t want her to get too big-headed (no pun intended).
Whenever people gush about how good 'consentual' open relationships are, I always point out that 90% of them aren't truly mutual. There's almost always an emotional imbalance where one or more people gets used and hurt but goes along with it to be with someone
A friend of mine tried to have an open marriage. It ended when the wife was not including him on the threesomes with another dude. It just doesn’t work
@@Alexis_005 Same thing happened to a friend of mine too but the opposite. She's still with him for some reason tho and thinks they're just open like that and plus they have kids.
I think some people will agree with being friends with benefits just to have access from what I've seen and I've experienced it's ok for them to have options but they don't want the other person to have options a part of me feels like it's more of a conquer than feelings
The thing I find despicable in one sided relationship, is when the person who wants to remain open, doesn't end the relationship right here and now when they realise that the other person loves them. It's selfish to let someone hope that things will change when it never will.
Nah, it's the fault of the person that is delusional. They are going to hurt themselves by not wanting to accept the reality. And even if the other person says it straight, or ignores it, or maybe doesn't see it, the delusional person will be emotionally hurt because they don't have the comprehension of how the world works. Either way, they'll either wake up after getting hurt, or need to go though the same process multiple times. Some may forever be this way 🤷
Sleepy Mask I agree with you, but I think that it’s surely uncomfortable for the other person who knows that they have this person who’s clearly in love with them? If I was in a situation where I wanted something casual but I knew the other person had feelings I would cut it off, it’s so uncomfortable for both people...
@@MA-se1iv yeah, but I don't believe most people, or that girl in the video was trying to have power over the person that showed to have more feelings. They might've had a discussion afterwards for all we know and made a mature decision.
Sleepy Mask that’s true. It just feels like a bad situation all around, one person has feelings for someone who doesn’t reciprocate it and the other person has to tread really careful not to hurt them
@@MA-se1iv yeah, it is a hard situation because this type of person may come with a certain mindset or pattern which is unhealthy for them, and it is hard to help them all around. And both parties are probably at a point in life where they don't and couldn't know everything about relationships and may be at a certain stage where they are learning.
My husband's co-worker has an open relationship with a hooker. They hook up weekly and she always asks for cash after. He's like, no it's not like that. Hahah. It is though.
Well maybe this hooker went rouge and just flirted with him next thing u know she has her hand down his pants and all of a sudden “ I want money” not how it works she has to tell him
I would say to save yourself the headache because it's a temporary pleasure at a high cost not only emotionally but physically. Better to be safe than sorry I'm not saying don't have sex but be picky like girls be picky because some of them out here are dusties.
So true, @Aba, the more you stay in that kind of a relationship the more you're missing out on someone who will appreciate you more and fully. A loving relationship, on both sides, is so amazing!
The blue Jean girl had me disliking her at first. Clingy, dense and absorbed in the person across from her. Then as we went along I started feeling for her and really disliking the girl opposite from her. You could tell the chick opposite from her was just sucking the attention and affection out of this poor girl. Smiling with every compliment and ILY she got. And for what? To give what back? Blue jean girl, you can't change nobody with love, except yourself. Love on yourself.
I got that vibe too. She seemed really nice and would be better off with someone who cared about her, rather than chasing someone who didn't really care for her.
Yes!! And that girl across from here was also using being Bi as her reason for not being able to commit. Like girl, Bisexuals can commit easily. You just want to fuck around and still have someone at home waiting on you.
i dont dislike her either, i just feel sorry for her because she's delusional. She's putting everything into a single person that does not love her back.
I wouldn't say so, the girl in blue obviously knew the other girl was fucking other people and that it was clearly just a friends with benefits but the girl in blue has so many insecurities that shes doing this to herself. She should be alone and seek some therapy
@@juiceboxbzrk the friendzone is definitely a thing haha. I'm not entirely sure you know what it means, though, based on the second part of your comment.
Jonathan if u are “friend zoned” then that means u played the friend part in hopes u would be promoted. being someones friend in hopes they’d feel the same about u is nothing but negativity so in the long run he’s right u arent losing any positives being someones friend means u are giving up something one way or another and if u arent getting what u want in return then its a waste of time.
They now have an opportunity to be honest with their feelings. Most of those folks don't have the courage to tell someone "Hey, we need to sit down and get serious.". Now they have a guise, "Hey, it's a fun little show thing. Gonna talk about our relationship. No big deal." Then they get in here, have some drinks, questions are being asked, and now the real stuff comes forth. When the questions are being asked, and they have a segue into saying how they truly feel and you know once this is recorded there is no going back on doing nothing... Easy to see how this stuff happens. I'm very ashamed at some of these replies. Very cynical and apathetic.
I'm pretty sure she's still sleeping with smiley face. I agree with the crying part but she showed a lack of shame that doesn't give me hope that she has learnt anything yet.
Just found you guys on the tube yesterday, and have been binging your videos. I haven’t laughed soo hard in a long time. I enjoy how comedic, insightful, and thought provoking your videos are. Thank you. X
There's a Portuguese saying I learned when I was a kid, "Mais val só do que mal acompanhado." It means, "It's better to be alone then have bad company." I've always lived by it.
9 times out of 10, "friends with benefits" is just one person that can't manage to find anyone else sleeping with someone who has no trouble juggling three or four plates at once.
@epenies and @Kirsten: That is perfectly intelligible English. If you have trouble comprehending it, it's because you are too dumb to read and has nothing to do with what you're reading. Apart from being written in proper English it also explains the problem of FWB very accurately. Now go back to school and learn to read, so you can stop embarassing yourself on YT like this.
I just wanted to thank you guys. Through your discussions and watching these videos it's helped me realize toxic thought patterns and behaviors I've had in my own relationships and how I view myself and the things that I need to work on so thx you so much 😊
Watching those two women is like watching a cute animal who is mortally wounded in the road like live its last moments... you know you can't save it and it's trying to hold on and it's just heart breaking. That poor girl in the blue is just... I feel so bad for her.
The funniest and saddest thing about these is the amount of dishonesty and unawareness these participants reveal about themselves. But thanks for letting the rest of the world know your stances. Saves us a lot of time and provide plenty of hilarity.
I'll never understand why people feel the need to air their private lives for the world to see. It's on the internet forever. Your kids will someday search you talking about your oral skills. Modesty is dead.
@@Rabbit-the-One The Asian girl might have accepted it just to not lose him or to be part of him being with someone else. Agreeing to a threesome doesn’t necessarily mean you are courageous...
I have a feeling if Mikayla just starts doing her thing and “acts” like she doesn’t care it’ll probably trigger the other chick. Aba said it perfectly that Mikayla is just upset with the power dynamic. Like girl please just take the power back and reclaim your self respect.
@@spinmaster6995 She said that, but she clearly enjoys the power dynamic being in her favour. She might be okay with it, but I think if the jean jacket girl got with a better looking girl and seemed happier White shirt would try to subtly undermine them or ask for a threesome.
I’m in a similar situation to the blue jacket girl and you talking about dating compassionately was unbelievably helpful to see it from an outsider’s perspective. So helpful.
THEORY: White adidas shirt girl is totally straight, been hurt by not getting guys she wanted, and is using this actual lesbian for her attention, and delights in it to fill the void. Pray for her soul. (This is meant to be funny, more so than hating)
I think thats why theres alot of aggression and abuse within lesbian relationships i think. Because they truly arent gay but hurt by past relationships
@@sasori8555 I have personally known two women who were straight, became lesbians, and then all of a sudden were not lesbians anymore. They do not treat people well.
@@adamzoubi96 saying most girls is a big statement my guy. I've never been into monogamy so I've had my fair share and I had many different experiences. I couldn't say it's a 50/50 but it's definitely not the way you're saying it. What I can tell u tho is that I like different types ,from the really skinny to the BBW type and anywhere in between. The chunky ones and white girls have been the best in my personal experience. When it comes to the petite girls , pretty face with a fat ass and nice tittys those are either freaks or complete failures at sex. 80% of those 9-10s were horrible at it. 20% were freaks.
This is so heartbreaking. Selfish as hell to string someone along when they CLEARLY have feelings for you. My fiance and I have an "odd" kind of relationship (so I'm told), but the communication is there 100%. I know how lucky I am .
Honestly I think people need to realize their feelings in a relationship does not necessarily speak to what is the reality at play. So while you may be in love and enjoy being with this other person, it is only a part of what is actually happening. What's worse is when you are blinded by what you want that you project your own reasoning for why the other person won't commit. I have friends say "he's just a little unsure but deep down I know he wants to commit ". Maybe thats true or maybe he likes you but does not see that type of relationship with you. Secondly if you are in a situationship where you are casually dating except only one party does the casual dating part while other is expected to remain committed (spoken or unspoken rule) you need to reevaluate the the relationship.
Logged in on my work computer just to leave this comment cause I just couldn't let it go: The woman in white at 11:47 (Madison) seems to be getting some sick, sadistic pleasure in stringing along the woman in blue (Mikayla, I think) whose heart and soul is clearly in this "FWB" relationship. Throughout the video, Madison seems so toxic, emotionally unavailable and immature, not at all communicating in a emotionally-responsible way nor being respectful of Mikayla's feelings and predicament. She knows Mikayla is in love with her and this is no longer a FWB/joke-relationship, but Madison still doesn't take the responsibility or the initiative to then do right by her and end it. Even though she's stating her reasons that she "doesn't like to choose", it's actually a form of deflection and she's doing it just enough to still keep Mikayla waiting and hoping that one day she will change her mind to choose Mikayla. She's enabling and taking advantage Mikayla's codependency and that is cruel, not to mention disrespectful to exploit the upperhand that she knows she has over Mikayla. A more emotionally honest way to communicate would be for Madison to say that she doesn't see Mikayla in that way, and to just end it thereby protecting Mikayla from getting hurt even more. This woman is just a narc and a shitty friend overall. She has no integrity in the way she carries herself here. I hope Mikayla gets the help she needs and one day realizes that Madison's emotional unavailability towards her was a blessing in disguise.
Ryan Williams I get what you’re saying but Mikayla is codependent. The concept of “power of choice” fall on deaf ears to people who are as desperate and needy as Mikayla. She suffers from low self-esteem and she is not an actualized person. So of course she isn’t going to realize that she has a choice nor feel empowered to choose. She is coming from a place of need and desperation where Madison is like breathing oxygen (personally to me, Madison is toxic air). She does not yet know that she can survive without this toxic air and she deserves something healthy. I feel Mikayla firstly needs some sort of help like therapy or a form of counseling. It’s not normal to be so overly-attached to a person the way she is. She has underlying issues that she is projecting on Madison, like the fear of abandonment for one. Yes, Madison enables Mikayla and Mikayla enables Madison, it’s a codependent and toxic relationship. That’s why it’s been going on for so long and yet has gotten nowhere. It has all the passions of a toxic relationship but no safe foundation for things to progress. I hope she is able to first have her underlying issues resolved. Only when Mikayla reaches that level of resolving her deep-seated issues will she able to look back and realize that she had a choice all along but as long as she’s in the thick of it, she will continue looking for others for a sense of purpose and value (aka to get a sense of self-worth from others). It might take being emotionally burned by Madison, even more than what she’s already gone through for that to be her wake-up call. If she already knew about the power of choice, I doubt she would have chosen to be this hurt and stay this miserable. It sounds like victim-blaming to be honest. She is obviously relying on hope because she doesn’t know her power of choice so it’s a bit of a moot argument.
I liked this commsnt, because there is truth in it. However....do adult women have freedom and agency? Or are they children to be protected from their own decisions. If women are adults, and have agency... no one has a right to protect them from their own decisions. Blue shirt is the one that is responsible to stop the interaction, not white shirt.
@@breakingthemasks Thanks for the like! I'm not sure I fully understand but I can try addressing some points you made. I'd say just because some women are adults doesn't mean they are healthy adults. The same is true for men too. Being a healthy adult means that the person is self-actualized, that they are able to take emotional responsibility for themselves, self-reliant and don't get lost in others and their drama. In other words, healthy adults have good emotional boundaries. Here, blue-shirt does not. Yes, blue-shirt (Mikayla) is responsible for herself (as everyone is), and although she is an adult woman, she isn't a healthy adult - she suffers from low self-esteem. and lets white-shirt (Madison) disrespect her all while begging white-shirt to get into a relationship with her. White-shirt knows blue-shirt is codependent and sees it to be rightfully unhealthy, but white-shirt is also doing nothing to stop it. She is enabling blue-shirt's dependency on her and is stringing her along. She isn't being a good friend to blue-shirt by distancing herself so blue-shirt can get some perspective on the matter. Instead ,she likes to keep blue-shirt on a leash. Asking blue-shirt to stop the interaction is like asking a drug addict to stop taking drugs. I am sure they want to and they know they are getting hurt, but somehow they can't seem to - it has taken too much control of them. They are not doing it out of choice, they are doing it out of habit which is a HUGE difference!! They have lost their willpower so of course they cannot stop it. It doesn't mean they cannot break out of it. But they will need assistance. It's too much for one person to handle. Blue-shirt's codependency is like an addiction where you are addicted to people (instead of drugs), and it's something she will need help with, if she is able to recognize it. She is making bad decisions from a place of need and desperation. It's much healthier to want to get into a relationship by choice, not because you need to out of desperation where you have to beg the other person to get in to the relationship with you. Blue-shirt is behaving like a child (even if she is physically an adult), and needs to be looked out for and supported until she is able to get some good perspective on the matter through therapy or counseling. Because right now, she is not in a frame of mind to just stop the interaction for herself. So although she is technically an adult, she is not thinking like one and has child-like vulnerability. White-shirt is supposed to be a friend and could have provided healthy support, but instead has her own selfish agenda where she likes to see blue-shirt suffer by playing hard to get. So I'd say both are contributing to blue-shirt's situation. But the person who calls herself blue shirt's friend is in a better position to help, but still chooses not to. I hope blue-shirt is able to get the help she needs. I am sure if she could, blue-shirt would have stopped this for herself. No one likes begging and being mistreated and demeaned the way white-shirt seems to. Everyone likes to be valued, but obviously blue-shirt is helpless to stop it for herself and get out of there. So yes, personally, I think she needs to some emotional guidance (protection is a strong word) until she sees things clearly.
@@PreYeah ... So, the problem with your position is that there is no objective standard to know which human should be treated as an adult (that is, capable of deciding what interactions to have and which ones to avoid) and which human should be treated as a child (that is, needing external humans to decide what that person is allowed to do, and which interactions are ok). If it's not something simplex like an age cutoff for drinking, voting, etc... Then there is an endless battle for which humans should be protected, and who should protect them. Either blue shirt is an adult, and this responsible for her own decisions, including the bad ones... Or she is a child, and needs someone else to run her life. Makeing sure she eats vegetables, sleeps well, and only spends time with wholesome friends. See the issue?
@@TheJbh147 lol it might not have been used right I gotta admit it's a bit funny or sounds atleast It got liiddo air from the nose laugh. You know not quite a full lol but a whisper of a haha . . . I dont even know what it's called and too lazy to look.
@@MusMasi person: Doctor what's the prognosis? Will he be okay? Doctor: I'm sorry to have to tell you this but given the symptoms all signs point to Simp Syndrome. There is nothing we can do but be there when they come to there sense if ever they do not many do tho . A simps mind cannot be changed for they are under the spell of thou simp-y ? Simp-er ?? Person being simped over? Lmao idk this already went farther then need to be just killed it
Everyone can not casual date. It takes a certain kind of person. Being honest and upfront with what you want from the beginning of your interactions with the other person is important.
You have to be completely selfish to casual date. Hate to say it but it's true. Don't get bent out of shape , just own it and don't casually date anyone else who isn't just as selfish.
"Why it would be bad if we dated?" "Well, there's upsides and downsides to everything" My guy DODGED that question like it was nothing! What a G! He's like neo from the matrix out here 😂
I don't understand when people show their friends with benefits situation publicly. I always thought it was supposed to be friends in public and benefits in private.
You're only going to figure out what you want by dating. Have your fun when you're young. Don't worry about long term relationships then when you're older you'll be ready to settle down & will have enough experience to know what you actually like.
My ex wasn't supportive and im sure just used me to experiment since she's gay now. We we're together for a year and she let me off the hook without a second thought. It broke my heart since i was the only one who was attached. It...hurt. haha
They all seem one sided relationship, even the most “balanced” one. That being the tall guy and short blond haired girl, they’re both seeing other people but he clearly doesn’t joy it or at least being told about it.
Dylan Carroll to be fair, I have a few guys I see semi regularly, it’s very clear we’re both seeing other people but I absolutely do not want to hear about the other women they’re sleeping with. It’s not because I expect our relationship to get more serious or anything, but I don’t want to think about them rolling around with someone else, I don’t want to wonder if I’m being compared or wonder if they were with someone else recently or whatever. Fully aware it happens, but I don’t want to see or hear about it. But I’m also someone who doesn’t find things like threesomes enjoyable because I don’t share
I noticed men dont want to hear about it, but then get pissed when they find out. I personally think you should let the person know. Have had a few times where a girl got pissed at me because she was hooking up with the same guy as me. When I asked "I thought you guys were just hooking up, just he and I?" They would say yeah but and I would say "Oh then you need to get over those feelings, either find a boyfriend or dont play a game you cant play"
That "8" is like my answer when a woman asks me how old I think they are. My answer is always "21", because nobody ever got slapped for telling a woman she looks 21... Lol
"Why do you think it would be bad for us to be in a committed relationship?" How about, "because you're still looking for better options, a freedom I should be exercising." "I love you" was her sidestepping her underlying abandonment issues.
This is so true, I’ve been on both sides of this coin and it’s stressful either way. The one in wait is constantly being discouraged and put down by the lack of desire. Meanwhile the one that’s is exploring constantly feels constrained.
@@tmerchead1 if i had someone that liked me i would try to see why and im not good at understanding feelings but she looks kind but recording tells somethings you cant see in person like someone full of shit
My husband and I started as friends with benefits. It was so awesome. Then I got feelings. I didn’t want that or like that so I tried to bail. Didn’t know he already had feelings. I fought it like hell because that’s not what I wanted at the time. But didn’t want to lose his friendship. After much communication, I caved and we tried a committed relationship . 7 years and still going. He is still my best friend. Super glad I gave it a shot and didn’t just take off like my cold feet told me to lol
I am old enough to know that I am not built for casual sex. I always catch feelings. Besides, I don't want to have sex if I don't have (some) feelings, be it lust or something else. Also, good for you both! Glad it had a happy ending (pun 100% intended)
In a way I think it's good they do this. Sure one of the reasons the producers are probably doing is to get more viewers. But it does force in a way the participants to face some important issues that it looks like they haven't dealt with. Also helps viewers get an objective view. We see them, ca offer advice, counsel and learn from their mistakes or bad decisions. It would probably be better doing something like this in like therapy though but what fwb would go on therapy? well one of the fwb can go to therapy and think about what they should do about their feelings regarding the relationship On the bright side one of the fwb decided to make it more than fwb.
“Better to be lonely and real with yourself than fake and with someone who doesn’t really want you.” Truth punch to the gut. I love the way you say stuff Aba. Life needs more brutal honesty.
It's so uncomfortable watching two people try to communicate when they're not on the same page. Just ends up leaving the person who's ready to commit hurt and upset cause the other person isn't brave enough to let them move on to someone else.
"I know where we live in this new age where everyone wants to be open ... A lot of people are not cut out for it and IT'S OKAY but be honest with yourselves. Better to be lonely and real with yourself than be fake and with someone who doesn't really want you". This hit me, as a guy, you're expected to always be talking to women and having casual sex. I tried and for me it wasn't comfortable at all. Sex, for me, is about love, not just pleasure. I should be more comfortable with being on my own until I find someone I care instead of trying to be someone I'm not. I think it's just excepting that I'm just not the type of person who can have a casual fling but because I'm not, I get looked down upon by others who insult me and think it's weird.
Really liked what you said about "dating compassionately". I was in a relationship with someone who was choosing to be celibate until marriage and there came a point where I knew she was going to compromise that in the hope that we would end up married. But I also knew that I wasn't ready for marriage so the most compassionate thing I could do was to break off the relationship. I didn't want her to compromise her values for what might have been a false hope.
well done man, been there before, but the woman was lying to me, she was not really celibate but she wanted to project herself a certain way to me. I did not leave her because she claimed wanted to be celibate but because she was deceptive and manipulative in a lot of ways. That is one thing that is so off putting about entering the relationship mine field is that there is a lot of deception and manipulation involved.
Interesting. Hopefully she moves on and finds someone who gives her what she wants.
So much L
Simp.
this was nice to read idk. i wish my sister's boyfriend cared that much about her tbh
Men ain't afraid of commitment: most of us have had the same barber and football team our whole lives...
Calling me out huh
@@allansamuel9631 ahhh, are you a glory hunter or you just keep changing your barber? Lol
Cas Martin I’m just looking for the right barber for me 😔
@@Botyoutubeaccount I hear you man, I found me the right barber aged 18 and nearly 20 years later I'm still with him, but as I moved abroad we're no longer together. Bro, I taught myself how to cut my own hair and I can do it more or less as good as my own barber now so if you can't find the right barber, teach yourself how to do it yourself (there is a hidden metaphor in there, although the story is true)
Okay wise ass. Afraid of commiting to marriage.
People are forcing themselves to live a life of casual sex when they're are not built for it.
(That's not to say that everyone is the same)
Precisely. If you're not not that kind of person or realize you aren't don't do it or try to compete with someone else. It's pointless
The idea of casual sex to me is just farced🤷🏿♂️
💯
Been there done that NO THANK YOU
Exactly, Alexandra.... HOW the hell are people even able to fuck with someone without emotions... and no, LUST is NOT an emotion… it's a catalyst that depends on actual love to fully work properly. If love and care are missing, it becomes unhealthy and damaging.
"Better to be lonely and real with yourself, than to be fake and be with someone who really doesn't want you." It hurts, be man ain't that the truth. I needed to hear that.
All facts
Truth!!
The truth hurts but better than a sweet lie.
truh
lol truth (couldnt delete it)
The guy “asking out” the Asian girl had the same energy as when I yelled to a boy across the playground that I liked him and he responded “sweet” in 2nd grade
Yo Lacey Green, when’re you making the next episode of Braless?? Best show on TH-cam.
Am I weird for thinking they looked super cute together?
Also your story is hilarious. 😅
That was low key very Han Solo of him 😂
@DJHart bruh what
@@brianpbillingsley3687 yes you are weird for thinking that, she looks better with an Asian guy.
Guys, if you are in a one sided relationship. LEAVE.
Took me nearly five years to realize it, if you're feeling more pain than happiness, get the fuck out.
Amen
Best advice. Wish I had left sooner
Somehow being friends with benefits seems harder than being in a relationship..
It’s cause you’re fighting a battle on two fronts, you’re not trying to catch feels for the person and you’re hoping the person doesn’t catch feelings for you
One of them is always more emotionally invested than the other. Most times wanting it to be a committed relationship despite the agreement
It's just the cowards and emotionally crippled people's way of dating.
@@andrelamarqjenkins exactly.. And mostly it's the girl I think
Friends with benefits is a misnomer
Bless that girl's heart, she really needs to get outta that relationship. White shirt is using her for a self esteem boost because she can't get a guy to care that much for her. Blue shirt shouldn't just walk out of that, she needs to run
She isn't normal either, she seems clingy and needy.
@@samyakhp4353 not really. if white shirt isn’t really interested, she would find anything blue jacket does as « clingy » and « needy »
@@thequeenofhearts4227 ppl disagree just to disagree lol u got no point bruv
Bless that girl's heart, for real. First impressions off the video she is so cute and unfortunately for me, I have been in her position before as in trying to be with someone who leads me on but wants to keep it open. It's so hard. So awful! White shirt better have broken it off by now. She has to see how damaging this relationship is for jeans jacket homie.
@@DirtyRobohobo No, blue shirt better have broken it off.
If yall were impressed by the guess yall gotta like and comment or Aba will fight you.
*I Just knew! I’m a genius*
Fham I guessed 8 too
yes sir
I can take Aba
Preach on the other hand, well, lets put a pin on that 💪
I'm white and am not triggered by the jokes in fact I'm howling 😂
It's almost never just friends with benefits. Someone always catches feelings.
Nathaniel Hendrix wht does that even mean nigga? 😂
PACIFIK wht does that even mean nigga?😂
That's why this arrangement, and more specifically normalizing this arrangement is bad. People go into this not wanting to be "lame", then it destroys them
That's how you get a whole generation of miserable people with the inability to function properly in a committed relationship
Now imagine what types of families they would create? The children raised in that would be just really bad
@@ang5798 of course it's bad. You don't choose who you fall in love with and you're consistently having sex with this person. You might be able to seperate sex from any feelings you might have from them as long as you got options and are capable of having sex with multiple people, but if you hit a drought or otherwise stop having sex with other people, you will in all likelihood get your wires crossed real quick.
@@danieldaw1778 you can't completely separate sex from the feelings, it's not possible, and even less for women than for men. It's like walking into fire and then crying because you're burning.
Stop walking into fire, stop spreading fire, and start actively putting the fire down, otherwise it will eat you and your children
And stop showing being eaten by fire as something normal that should be accepted as coexistence.
I love when someone uses their astrological sign as an explanation for their behavior or personality because then I know not to trust their line of reasoning. It's a massive red flag for me, even in friendships.
Never considered becoming your friend anyways
@@kwakugyebi6705 It's Aquarius, you KitKat
@@kwakugyebi6705 I imagine it's somewhere along September? (I was just messing with ya haha)
Right becuase then they act like they cant change their wrong because its just who they are
@@patriciaangelone2320 get some top lip before you make a comment you non existent rat
"If you love them you'll always want them to respect themselves..." Definitely taking this one to heart. Thanks for the 🦪 of wisdom.
8 is the liar's 5.
Nah i think its mainly 7
If we're honest your hurt and you think we're mean.
If we're nice you think we playin games.
Tf.
If you're asking at that point. You shouldn't be dating for yourself.
*Flies away*
Meouch, but true
My same thoughts, he doesn’t want her to stop but 8 is to say she’s okish a 5 aka average.
This comment reflect every one of y’all’s insecurities
When the girl said “use your words,” like her fwb is a child; gross. Can’t stand condescending people like that. That other girl needs to get out of there, real quick!
She also completely ignored/avoided answering some important questions, very much not "using her words"
She doesn't care about her friend she just wants her for fun time and it's never gonna change it's sad that the blue jacket girl caught feelings and it's never gonna happen she needs to move on and start loving herself a bit more her self esteem seems low
Francisco Laurean yes, I completely agree
Daniel Vulku yes, I noticed that as well. She sounds like a massive manipulator
Yup an ur right jean jacket girl needs to cut her off ASAP she is probably never going to love her the way she does but jean jacket girl might just b too in love
"Slid into her DMs." The start of a beautiful, modern romance.
@rumba rumba yes
Trashy asf
@@idipped2521 not always trashy...my bf "slid into my DMs" after a year of knowing each other and we started dating right away. For that year previous we weren't allowed to date each other (for reasons that I'd rather not explain). Shit just happens that way some times. I think it was sweet that he wanted me and even though during that year we dated other people we still had a thing for each other. Really just gods plan.
@@MissSimone02 but you knew eachother before he came into your dms so that's not the same thing so we can say this is trashy
@@GoncaloDCa it doesnt have to be trashy tho. Dating options are super limited rn 🤷🏾♀️
We can agree to disagree.
Preach should be a songwriter. He randomly sings the catchiest melodies, lol.
🎶It is very One sided relationship🎶
I love it 😂
I don't understand why these people stick around with someone that's not willing to commit to the relationship the same way they are. Just leave, stop wasting your time.
It's called the delusion syndrome
Self delusion and low self esteem
Hope. It's a pretty damaging thing. Hope is what kept Blacks alive through slavery, but hope is also what keeps a woman fixing a plate of food for her estranged husband who walked out on her.
Hope dies last. Bad preservation instinct and bad self image too, probably.
It's a severe lack of self esteem. They think they can't find another individual so they wait it out hoping for change.
Now I'll say that you will change as you grow older, but some people don't want to wait that long
"My first girlfriend was white... MY LA-"
Advertisements: Hello there were you doing anything?
Lmao same thing happened to me I was like "that timing"
😂😂
@@375kingz Lmao, they def planned this
Lol
@@TheStrategyStudio268 for sure lol
The reason why a lot of relationships fail is too much exposure. Your whole life doesn't have to be publicized.
@Skor Skoerttrue especially if it wasn't real to begin with.😬
True.
Mainly because it wasn't real. If your relationship is so fragile it can't last through an interview, you had bigger problems long before the exposure.
@Skor Skoert that's true too. Telling too many people and rushing before it manifests.
@@brandonf.8360 u right about that
Heeeelp I can’t stop watching Aba and Preach!!!!
There's no need for help here. You're good to go.
Found this channel a month ago and i cant stop also. 😂😂
Women: Why can't men understand us? Other Women: Apparently we don't even understand each other. Men: Slow clapping ensues!
*clap....*
*Clap....*
Clap...
😂😂😂😂
#1 comment
I mean, we've had women date women to find out how men feel, and even they say wtf to some of the stuff we deal with lol.
Write this down on stone
"I don't like to commit"
Has a heap of tattoo's.
I think you will find that most people with tattoos don’t really think too far ahead
well commitment is more like emotional responsability and with a tattoo the only responsability you got is walking around with an ugly ass tattoo your whole life
Committing to yourself is different than committing to another person. A tattoo won’t break your heart
@@victoriachristina1 I swear alot of people have a thing where they regret certain tattoos almost immediately
Nicely observed.
“The want to have someone in their life outweighs the respect for themselves.”- Aba&Preach 2020. That was wise. Very wise.
Damn...
Dammnn woke af
The lesbian FWB should stop seeing each other! The girl in the blue need to move on!!!!
God that poor girl in the Jean jacket is getting played by her own kind
Honestly she let it happened, she’s not being honest with herself.
That blue jean jacket girl needs to LEAVE ohmygod I’ve seen this unhealthy dynamic so much irl😭
I've been her. Holding on for whatever scrap of hope they give you because you like/love them so much. Makes you stop seeing things for what they are when your hope and desire is that high. Poor, delusional heart.
I'm good now though. 😘
Poor girl :( I just want to hug her and tell it will be ok.
EDIT: Also the Asian girl. I hope their relationship works out, but... I am not holding my breath.
Naw....apparently on her Instagram it was all a joke...they thought it would be funny to do....they are actually a couple🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️the adidas girl was receiving so much hate...and they said they were just llaying
@@nocommonsense8950 How much you wanna bet addias girl made up that story to stop the online hate she was receiving for acting like a garbage human on the internet....Those reactions were too genuine to be fake.
@@dudemcgee256 you kinda right tho😂😂...it’s funny but sad
"... I'm a Libra"
girl if you don't just...
I got to remember the next time I get called out for playing someone as a fool to say that I'm a Libra, but I have the feeling it doesn't play out the same way for a hetero Latino male.
I’m a Libra but damn that has nothing to do with any of this smh
Carlos Mosqueda
😂
Stop following this astrology shit follow Jesus you dumb mfers
Hailey T same. I swear Libras everywhere just died a little inside
Thanks for the insight. I was the female in blue. I guess I wasn't emotionally responsible because I kept holding on to a dream. The F'd up part about it was that she was killed in an accident. I still carry around this endless love like an idiot but seeing this and hearing you somehow helped me to wake up. I can't keep pining after someone that is not only gone but was never really mine in the 1st place. Thanks for the reality check.
You are not an idiot for loving someone.
It breaks my heart you feel that way.
You are a loving person and that's why you love people.
I'm so sorry to hear about all of that! I really hope you're doing well and that you've learned you're definitely NOT an idiot for feeling what it is that you have felt!
Ohh sorry to hear. Hope you’re taking care and that you someday find a new love that is mutual and supportive when you’re ready ❤️
Literally me …my first love (4th grade, ik super young) ..I was told he committed suicide(I moved away so I didn’t know myself)…and I found out in 10th grade…that he was alive. But when I tried talking to him, he didn’t remember me at all. Turns out he’d been in a car accident and didn’t remember anything from that time, it apparently happened shortly after I had moved away…I definitely understand loving someone that’s not there and even loving someone that doesn’t even…remember anything you shared..no memories or anything. But what I’ve also learned is that it’s okay to love, and love hard…it means you have a big heart..but it also means you have to do your best to protect that big heart of yours. Not everyone will treat it with kindness or the delicacy that you need. It’s your greatest strength and weakness. I hope that you are doing well in your healing journey and I pray that you can find someone to love you properly but before you do so, be sure to love yourself first. 💜
Girl, you are STUNNING and I love your vibe. You deserve so much better.
don't want to catch those hands leaving this here...
Huh?
🤣🤣
@@sthoughtsarchive2791 Aba said he will fight anyone that doesn't comment and like because of the 8/10 prediction. "Don't want to catch those hands" = "don't want to fight"
@@Brby1 ooh oky👌
Yeah bro I’m there with you.
Don't let your self be someone's plan b
Right. That was so cringey and difficult to watch. I suffered from second-hand embarrassment.
Sometimes it's better to be that then the main guy getting cheated on with plan b .
Yeah it's so one sided with the girl in the blue Jean jacket
Gramo Chopin sloppy seconds can’t be good in any way unless you’re incapable of getting your own girl
Yup that is no way to live
Dude: "Do you love me?"
Girl? "..................... Yes"
Dude: "Do you want me to be your boyfriend?"
Girl: "Would you want me to be your girlfriend?"
Dude: "Yeah, let's do it"
Girl: "Did you just ask me out? We're in a relationship!!"
Me watching them: ".... Cool.... ..... this isn't going to last at all...."
Did something about that seem loaded to you too? I get the vibe that someone is gonna use that situation for a power play.
@@cyberneticxylem9614 i swear… this probably ended on their way home after this video was recorded.
@@KRAFTWERK2K6 Makes me worried to deal with people. I just stick with cars now. Being "real" makes you seem weak these days.
“One sided relationship” out on iTunes now
Aba's ability to predict the people in jubilee's never ceases to amaze me. Cringe Grandmaster
I mean he knows cringe, and he knows people lol.
This is "CUT" channel, which is much better then Jubilee.
@@musicfilmhead9051 Oh fuck no. I watched both and Cut is definitely the more cringe and PC obsessed of the two. At least Jubilee encourages both sides to hear each other out and isn't afraid to let non liberals speak their mind. Cut's viewers are full of close minded idiots. They're Buzzfeed lite.
@@jackliang7241 you're right. I respect Jubilee a ton they really do represent everyone
She just had to mention her horoscope 🤣🤣🤣. "And I'm a libra."...nah, it's not because you're a libra, you're just awful.
If was a true type A she would be making a decision since not making a decision is giving up power.
Right I hate when people start bringin up their horoscopes an all that shit to explain y they do what they do
Libras are awful though.. all of them..
Astrology is fiction.
The person who cares less has all the power in the relationship - Chael P. Sonnen
But it begs the question.. where does Kevin Lee fit into this?
Ok great
Amaan A Kevin Lee sees holes in their relationship.
Man Dustin was really good last night, what a fight.
Undisputed champ
An open relationship means you dont have a relationship... Your just a life vest thats making life easier in a cold sea, while she swims around trying to find a boat she wants to ride exclusively back to shore and keep at the dock..
The rating of 8 is a way to preserve her ego on a televised show while saying its not that good
Its the back handed rating number
Its like “bitch I love you enough to preserve ya ego but you know damn well you trash, and you sorry.”
i got the feeling it was like a 4 or a 5 definitely not an 8
It was in the tone of his body language and not in the words that fell out of his mouth.
8 is the number you use when it’s bad but you don’t wanna hurt her feelings, 9 is the number you use when it’s good but you don’t want her to get too big-headed (no pun intended).
FYPNLP
she seems eager to please
Seems that the Adidas girl shirt I would say has some narcissistic traits. Blue shirt girl seems to be codependent.
I was thinking that as well
Seemed like very mild forms tho. Definitely could be worked out with therapy I think
Perfect target for those narcissistic tendencies too. Even if not fully a narcissist.
Not necessarily narcissism...she's just not that into her enough for a commitment.
Whenever people gush about how good 'consentual' open relationships are, I always point out that 90% of them aren't truly mutual. There's almost always an emotional imbalance where one or more people gets used and hurt but goes along with it to be with someone
sadly, isn't that a lot of marriages as well?
A friend of mine tried to have an open marriage. It ended when the wife was not including him on the threesomes with another dude. It just doesn’t work
@@Alexis_005 So it didn’t work because it wasn’t actually for him? Crazy
@@Alexis_005 Same thing happened to a friend of mine too but the opposite. She's still with him for some reason tho and thinks they're just open like that and plus they have kids.
I think some people will agree with being friends with benefits just to have access from what I've seen and I've experienced it's ok for them to have options but they don't want the other person to have options a part of me feels like it's more of a conquer than feelings
"Doesn't want you the way you want to be wanted" So true! Thank you guys, you really helped me.
The thing I find despicable in one sided relationship, is when the person who wants to remain open, doesn't end the relationship right here and now when they realise that the other person loves them.
It's selfish to let someone hope that things will change when it never will.
Nah, it's the fault of the person that is delusional. They are going to hurt themselves by not wanting to accept the reality. And even if the other person says it straight, or ignores it, or maybe doesn't see it, the delusional person will be emotionally hurt because they don't have the comprehension of how the world works. Either way, they'll either wake up after getting hurt, or need to go though the same process multiple times. Some may forever be this way 🤷
Sleepy Mask I agree with you, but I think that it’s surely uncomfortable for the other person who knows that they have this person who’s clearly in love with them? If I was in a situation where I wanted something casual but I knew the other person had feelings I would cut it off, it’s so uncomfortable for both people...
@@MA-se1iv yeah, but I don't believe most people, or that girl in the video was trying to have power over the person that showed to have more feelings. They might've had a discussion afterwards for all we know and made a mature decision.
Sleepy Mask that’s true. It just feels like a bad situation all around, one person has feelings for someone who doesn’t reciprocate it and the other person has to tread really careful not to hurt them
@@MA-se1iv yeah, it is a hard situation because this type of person may come with a certain mindset or pattern which is unhealthy for them, and it is hard to help them all around. And both parties are probably at a point in life where they don't and couldn't know everything about relationships and may be at a certain stage where they are learning.
My husband's co-worker has an open relationship with a hooker. They hook up weekly and she always asks for cash after. He's like, no it's not like that. Hahah. It is though.
rofl
What an idiot. Bruh. What did he think that relationship was. It’s a transactional relationship.
Well maybe this hooker went rouge and just flirted with him next thing u know she has her hand down his pants and all of a sudden “ I want money” not how it works she has to tell him
Hig Hounty but weekly bro? She’s coming over every week and always asks for money and this guy still thinks he’s getting free coochie
Sounds like my wife 🤣
I`m gonna be honest i`m a guy 23 years of age
and the hook up culture and friends with benefits stuff. Ain`t my thing it`s not what i want out of life
It's stupid as fuck. This hook up nonsense. People might as well just go to an escort lol
Yeah it's not really worth it. Sex with a random person or a friend isn't the same as with someone you really love.
You can thank women for that.
T DW I sure do lmao
I would say to save yourself the headache because it's a temporary pleasure at a high cost not only emotionally but physically. Better to be safe than sorry I'm not saying don't have sex but be picky like girls be picky because some of them out here are dusties.
So true, @Aba, the more you stay in that kind of a relationship the more you're missing out on someone who will appreciate you more and fully. A loving relationship, on both sides, is so amazing!
The blue Jean girl had me disliking her at first. Clingy, dense and absorbed in the person across from her. Then as we went along I started feeling for her and really disliking the girl opposite from her. You could tell the chick opposite from her was just sucking the attention and affection out of this poor girl. Smiling with every compliment and ILY she got. And for what? To give what back?
Blue jean girl, you can't change nobody with love, except yourself. Love on yourself.
I got that vibe too. She seemed really nice and would be better off with someone who cared about her, rather than chasing someone who didn't really care for her.
Yes!! And that girl across from here was also using being Bi as her reason for not being able to commit. Like girl, Bisexuals can commit easily. You just want to fuck around and still have someone at home waiting on you.
i dont dislike her either, i just feel sorry for her because she's delusional. She's putting everything into a single person that does not love her back.
I wouldn't say so, the girl in blue obviously knew the other girl was fucking other people and that it was clearly just a friends with benefits but the girl in blue has so many insecurities that shes doing this to herself. She should be alone and seek some therapy
Blue jean girl keep taking brickshots like that cat from
krazy cat(old cartoon)
Thumbnail: "Friends with Benefits?"
Reality:"Friendzoned with Benefits."
No hands being thrown over here ✋
Lol. Ain’t no benefits to being friend zoned though 😑
Friendzoned is made up. If you dont want to be friends then do yourself a favor and bail. Not like you're going to lose anything positive
@@juiceboxbzrk the friendzone is definitely a thing haha. I'm not entirely sure you know what it means, though, based on the second part of your comment.
Jonathan if u are “friend zoned” then that means u played the friend part in hopes u would be promoted. being someones friend in hopes they’d feel the same about u is nothing but negativity so in the long run he’s right u arent losing any positives being someones friend means u are giving up something one way or another and if u arent getting what u want in return then its a waste of time.
@@Pieceless I agree. I'm just saying that it's something that happens regularly enough to warrant getting its own term.
The amount of cringe that came out of white shirt tattoo girl is off the charts
I think she likes the feeling of power she has over jean shirt girl.
She's exceptionally mean
@@trueblueclue Gives off narcissistic vibes
@@durnel2001 really narcissistic
Omg I was about to comment the same. She seems to like the power she has over her.
"Doesn't want you the way you want to be wanted"
Daaaaaaamn that hits.
Why do people make themselves so vulnerable on these dating videos, holy shit
Hoping for fame and money
Clout
Clout, but also extreme loneliness. Some of these dudes are hurting and it really shows lol
Catharsis
They now have an opportunity to be honest with their feelings. Most of those folks don't have the courage to tell someone "Hey, we need to sit down and get serious.". Now they have a guise, "Hey, it's a fun little show thing. Gonna talk about our relationship. No big deal." Then they get in here, have some drinks, questions are being asked, and now the real stuff comes forth. When the questions are being asked, and they have a segue into saying how they truly feel and you know once this is recorded there is no going back on doing nothing... Easy to see how this stuff happens. I'm very ashamed at some of these replies. Very cynical and apathetic.
Im positive the girl in the blue jean jacket cried after this and then went back to dating guys
I'm pretty sure she's still sleeping with smiley face. I agree with the crying part but she showed a lack of shame that doesn't give me hope that she has learnt anything yet.
Rule 1: The truth hurts
Rule 2: The truth MUST hurt
Nah I think she's probably straight up a lesbian and the other is maybe bi.
@@DSan-kl2yc The other is bi i think she kept referring to guys.
Kelechi Adimonye yeah jean jacket girl is too in love even after that she was probably telling herself that she can make it work
8 outta 10 is what people say when they don’t care and just want to be nice.
Pups could be worse I would’ve said 7
nah thats like really good but not perfect
9 is like one or a few flaws
and 10 is perfect and best uve had
What does it take to be a ten
Just found you guys on the tube yesterday, and have been binging your videos. I haven’t laughed soo hard in a long time. I enjoy how comedic, insightful, and thought provoking your videos are. Thank you. X
There's a Portuguese saying I learned when I was a kid, "Mais val só do que mal acompanhado." It means, "It's better to be alone then have bad company." I've always lived by it.
👏🏻👏🏻 mejor solo que mal acompañado 😉😉
this is very true
We have the same saying in Italian too 😃
That's so insightful
we say this in latinoamerica,too. I really live by this
Y'all finished that off on such a good message. If you're going to openly date, do it compassionately.
9 times out of 10, "friends with benefits" is just one person that can't manage to find anyone else sleeping with someone who has no trouble juggling three or four plates at once.
I don’t think that sentence is properly constructed. Made no sense.
Can you translate that to English please? 🤔
Ahh, the importance of grammar.
@epenies and @Kirsten:
That is perfectly intelligible English. If you have trouble comprehending it, it's because you are too dumb to read and has nothing to do with what you're reading.
Apart from being written in proper English it also explains the problem of FWB very accurately.
Now go back to school and learn to read, so you can stop embarassing yourself on YT like this.
@@allonifrah3465 It's not proper English. Go back to school and study English grammar. Preferably in England, where it comes from.
I just wanted to thank you guys. Through your discussions and watching these videos it's helped me realize toxic thought patterns and behaviors I've had in my own relationships and how I view myself and the things that I need to work on so thx you so much 😊
Watching those two women is like watching a cute animal who is mortally wounded in the road like live its last moments... you know you can't save it and it's trying to hold on and it's just heart breaking. That poor girl in the blue is just... I feel so bad for her.
Yea it turned my stomach...
@@grendelsmama2302 same
"Subtle hints do not work," AMEN TO THAT 👊🏿💯
The funniest and saddest thing about these is the amount of dishonesty and unawareness these participants reveal about themselves. But thanks for letting the rest of the world know your stances. Saves us a lot of time and provide plenty of hilarity.
That's basically the best thing we can take from these videos. lol an entertaining warning.
Have you ever seen the one with the woman and her first same sex girlfriend?
@@EricTD1995 No, unless Aba and Preach are covering it, I'm not giving Jubilee any of my attention or time. What a waste.
That girl in white just, yoooothe faces she’s making, super unpleasant. Blue painfully unaware.
I'll never understand why people feel the need to air their private lives for the world to see. It's on the internet forever. Your kids will someday search you talking about your oral skills. Modesty is dead.
Agreed. But it sure is entertaining to watch. 😆
Because they’re paid and it’s for the show and entertainment of us
Imagine Jimmy telling Jason.....you know your mother's an 8 bitch.😂😂😂
The west is full of degenerates
Joshua Crain YA GAD DANM RIGHT !
The guy with the asian chick, they are just stuck together, they are too insecure to move on and you can tell.
Bro, they've got a third act in that duo. Insecurities don't bring about 3 ways. There's some real courage in there
@@Rabbit-the-One Sorry but anyone ypu "Love" aren't sharing you in the Bed.
@@Rabbit-the-One The Asian girl might have accepted it just to not lose him or to be part of him being with someone else. Agreeing to a threesome doesn’t necessarily mean you are courageous...
@@Rabbit-the-One gtfo with your Polygamous ideology, respectfully
@@AshleyMintz I kinda get that vibe from her but atleast looks wise she is out of his league..
I have a feeling if Mikayla just starts doing her thing and “acts” like she doesn’t care it’ll probably trigger the other chick. Aba said it perfectly that Mikayla is just upset with the power dynamic. Like girl please just take the power back and reclaim your self respect.
Katarzyna Rajczyk but the white shirt lady said she would still be friends if the jean jacket lady got in a committed relationship.
What are you talking about? You sound like Mikayla overly emotional.
I think you are right but that just proves that they shouldn't be together.
SpinMaster yeah I think the problem is jean jacket girl looked at ole girl like a lover while ole girl looks at jean jacket girl as a human fuck toy
@@spinmaster6995 She said that, but she clearly enjoys the power dynamic being in her favour. She might be okay with it, but I think if the jean jacket girl got with a better looking girl and seemed happier White shirt would try to subtly undermine them or ask for a threesome.
I’m in a similar situation to the blue jacket girl and you talking about dating compassionately was unbelievably helpful to see it from an outsider’s perspective. So helpful.
THEORY: White adidas shirt girl is totally straight, been hurt by not getting guys she wanted, and is using this actual lesbian for her attention, and delights in it to fill the void.
Pray for her soul.
(This is meant to be funny, more so than hating)
Yeah but you're only gonna go through what you allow. Thats the blue jacket girls fault.
I think thats why theres alot of aggression and abuse within lesbian relationships i think. Because they truly arent gay but hurt by past relationships
@@sasori8555 just an excuse for someone hurt to go through life and fuck someone else up.
@@sasori8555 I have personally known two women who were straight, became lesbians, and then all of a sudden were not lesbians anymore. They do not treat people well.
I wanna like this but it’s literally 222
“8” compliments her but still gives room for improvement. Practice will make her better.
Most girls don't know what good head really is.
Adam zoabi
Practice. The only way to improve.
Adam zoabi
That’s the biggest problem in the world today. The solution is practice. I’m going to start a global campaign where all women can learn.
@@adamzoubi96 saying most girls is a big statement my guy. I've never been into monogamy so I've had my fair share and I had many different experiences. I couldn't say it's a 50/50 but it's definitely not the way you're saying it. What I can tell u tho is that I like different types ,from the really skinny to the BBW type and anywhere in between. The chunky ones and white girls have been the best in my personal experience. When it comes to the petite girls , pretty face with a fat ass and nice tittys those are either freaks or complete failures at sex. 80% of those 9-10s were horrible at it. 20% were freaks.
@@giordanobruno1333 they hardly ever practice because she always think everything about her is 10
This is so heartbreaking. Selfish as hell to string someone along when they CLEARLY have feelings for you. My fiance and I have an "odd" kind of relationship (so I'm told), but the communication is there 100%. I know how lucky I am .
Alexis S Lol wdym? The lesbian relationship in the video was the worst one by far the poor lass in blue was getting manipulated.
Love how Abe said to date compassionately. That is so true. We need more of that in the dating world.
Honestly I think people need to realize their feelings in a relationship does not necessarily speak to what is the reality at play. So while you may be in love and enjoy being with this other person, it is only a part of what is actually happening. What's worse is when you are blinded by what you want that you project your own reasoning for why the other person won't commit. I have friends say "he's just a little unsure but deep down I know he wants to commit ". Maybe thats true or maybe he likes you but does not see that type of relationship with you. Secondly if you are in a situationship where you are casually dating except only one party does the casual dating part while other is expected to remain committed (spoken or unspoken rule) you need to reevaluate the the relationship.
💯
Preach
Yep!
Facts and nothing but.
All facts an not one opinion
Friends with benefits is never just 2 friends. One of them always wants more and that’s the only reason it’s happening.
Logged in on my work computer just to leave this comment cause I just couldn't let it go: The woman in white at 11:47 (Madison) seems to be getting some sick, sadistic pleasure in stringing along the woman in blue (Mikayla, I think) whose heart and soul is clearly in this "FWB" relationship.
Throughout the video, Madison seems so toxic, emotionally unavailable and immature, not at all communicating in a emotionally-responsible way nor being respectful of Mikayla's feelings and predicament. She knows Mikayla is in love with her and this is no longer a FWB/joke-relationship, but Madison still doesn't take the responsibility or the initiative to then do right by her and end it. Even though she's stating her reasons that she "doesn't like to choose", it's actually a form of deflection and she's doing it just enough to still keep Mikayla waiting and hoping that one day she will change her mind to choose Mikayla. She's enabling and taking advantage Mikayla's codependency and that is cruel, not to mention disrespectful to exploit the upperhand that she knows she has over Mikayla.
A more emotionally honest way to communicate would be for Madison to say that she doesn't see Mikayla in that way, and to just end it thereby protecting Mikayla from getting hurt even more. This woman is just a narc and a shitty friend overall. She has no integrity in the way she carries herself here. I hope Mikayla gets the help she needs and one day realizes that Madison's emotional unavailability towards her was a blessing in disguise.
Ryan Williams I get what you’re saying but Mikayla is codependent. The concept of “power of choice” fall on deaf ears to people who are as desperate and needy as Mikayla. She suffers from low self-esteem and she is not an actualized person. So of course she isn’t going to realize that she has a choice nor feel empowered to choose. She is coming from a place of need and desperation where Madison is like breathing oxygen (personally to me, Madison is toxic air). She does not yet know that she can survive without this toxic air and she deserves something healthy.
I feel Mikayla firstly needs some sort of help like therapy or a form of counseling. It’s not normal to be so overly-attached to a person the way she is. She has underlying issues that she is projecting on Madison, like the fear of abandonment for one. Yes, Madison enables Mikayla and Mikayla enables Madison, it’s a codependent and toxic relationship. That’s why it’s been going on for so long and yet has gotten nowhere. It has all the passions of a toxic relationship but no safe foundation for things to progress.
I hope she is able to first have her underlying issues resolved. Only when Mikayla reaches that level of resolving her deep-seated issues will she able to look back and realize that she had a choice all along but as long as she’s in the thick of it, she will continue looking for others for a sense of purpose and value (aka to get a sense of self-worth from others).
It might take being emotionally burned by Madison, even more than what she’s already gone through for that to be her wake-up call. If she already knew about the power of choice, I doubt she would have chosen to be this hurt and stay this miserable. It sounds like victim-blaming to be honest. She is obviously relying on hope because she doesn’t know her power of choice so it’s a bit of a moot argument.
Or she just uses her for head
I liked this commsnt, because there is truth in it.
However....do adult women have freedom and agency? Or are they children to be protected from their own decisions.
If women are adults, and have agency... no one has a right to protect them from their own decisions.
Blue shirt is the one that is responsible to stop the interaction, not white shirt.
@@breakingthemasks Thanks for the like! I'm not sure I fully understand but I can try addressing some points you made. I'd say just because some women are adults doesn't mean they are healthy adults. The same is true for men too. Being a healthy adult means that the person is self-actualized, that they are able to take emotional responsibility for themselves, self-reliant and don't get lost in others and their drama. In other words, healthy adults have good emotional boundaries. Here, blue-shirt does not.
Yes, blue-shirt (Mikayla) is responsible for herself (as everyone is), and although she is an adult woman, she isn't a healthy adult - she suffers from low self-esteem. and lets white-shirt (Madison) disrespect her all while begging white-shirt to get into a relationship with her. White-shirt knows blue-shirt is codependent and sees it to be rightfully unhealthy, but white-shirt is also doing nothing to stop it. She is enabling blue-shirt's dependency on her and is stringing her along. She isn't being a good friend to blue-shirt by distancing herself so blue-shirt can get some perspective on the matter. Instead ,she likes to keep blue-shirt on a leash.
Asking blue-shirt to stop the interaction is like asking a drug addict to stop taking drugs. I am sure they want to and they know they are getting hurt, but somehow they can't seem to - it has taken too much control of them. They are not doing it out of choice, they are doing it out of habit which is a HUGE difference!! They have lost their willpower so of course they cannot stop it. It doesn't mean they cannot break out of it. But they will need assistance. It's too much for one person to handle. Blue-shirt's codependency is like an addiction where you are addicted to people (instead of drugs), and it's something she will need help with, if she is able to recognize it. She is making bad decisions from a place of need and desperation. It's much healthier to want to get into a relationship by choice, not because you need to out of desperation where you have to beg the other person to get in to the relationship with you. Blue-shirt is behaving like a child (even if she is physically an adult), and needs to be looked out for and supported until she is able to get some good perspective on the matter through therapy or counseling. Because right now, she is not in a frame of mind to just stop the interaction for herself. So although she is technically an adult, she is not thinking like one and has child-like vulnerability. White-shirt is supposed to be a friend and could have provided healthy support, but instead has her own selfish agenda where she likes to see blue-shirt suffer by playing hard to get.
So I'd say both are contributing to blue-shirt's situation. But the person who calls herself blue shirt's friend is in a better position to help, but still chooses not to. I hope blue-shirt is able to get the help she needs. I am sure if she could, blue-shirt would have stopped this for herself. No one likes begging and being mistreated and demeaned the way white-shirt seems to. Everyone likes to be valued, but obviously blue-shirt is helpless to stop it for herself and get out of there. So yes, personally, I think she needs to some emotional guidance (protection is a strong word) until she sees things clearly.
@@PreYeah ... So, the problem with your position is that there is no objective standard to know which human should be treated as an adult (that is, capable of deciding what interactions to have and which ones to avoid) and which human should be treated as a child (that is, needing external humans to decide what that person is allowed to do, and which interactions are ok).
If it's not something simplex like an age cutoff for drinking, voting, etc... Then there is an endless battle for which humans should be protected, and who should protect them.
Either blue shirt is an adult, and this responsible for her own decisions, including the bad ones...
Or she is a child, and needs someone else to run her life. Makeing sure she eats vegetables, sleeps well, and only spends time with wholesome friends.
See the issue?
Preach’s smooth transition from French to English is just *chef’s kiss* To transition and not stumble or stutter?! Woooooow
Some wants friends with benefits, and some are just in a hostage situation feeling the Stockholm syndrome.
simp syndrome
last part sounds like a lot of marriages sadly.
@@MusMasi bruh, that's not simping haha
@@TheJbh147 lol it might not have been used right I gotta admit it's a bit funny or sounds atleast
It got liiddo air from the nose laugh. You know not quite a full lol but a whisper of a haha . . . I dont even know what it's called and too lazy to look.
@@MusMasi person: Doctor what's the prognosis? Will he be okay?
Doctor: I'm sorry to have to tell you this but given the symptoms all signs point to Simp Syndrome. There is nothing we can do but be there when they come to there sense if ever they do not many do tho . A simps mind cannot be changed for they are under the spell of thou simp-y ? Simp-er ?? Person being simped over? Lmao idk this already went farther then need to be just killed it
Everyone can not casual date. It takes a certain kind of person. Being honest and upfront with what you want from the beginning of your interactions with the other person is important.
"Hi my name is Kike *keekay- i wanna crack n barely talk back "
You have to be completely selfish to casual date. Hate to say it but it's true. Don't get bent out of shape , just own it and don't casually date anyone else who isn't just as selfish.
"Why it would be bad if we dated?"
"Well, there's upsides and downsides to everything"
My guy DODGED that question like it was nothing! What a G! He's like neo from the matrix out here 😂
Satisfied Skull Servant he as serial killer calmness...it’s kinda impressive tbh
... I'm just here cause I made a skull servant deck earlier today 😅
In EVERY relationship, there is always one chasing and the other being chased. If you're not sure which one you are, you're the chaser.
12:56 white top said "Use your words"
And the response was a full on "I love you"?! Ouch.
That Hurt To Watch.
She Needs To Just Let That Shrew Go.
4:48 When she said "I feel like it should be higher" he should have said "So do I"
Perfect.
Lmaoooooo 💯🤣
noooooo 😁😂😂
@JBcoolbreez if you never got a 10, how do you know what a 10 feels like 😏
I don't understand when people show their friends with benefits situation publicly.
I always thought it was supposed to be friends in public and benefits in private.
"Better to be lonely and real with yourself than to be fake and with someone who doesn't want you". Oooof I needed to hear that. I think we all do.
that’s why I don’t date lmao, I don’t know what I want and do not wish to complicate anyone else’s life with my inconsistencyyyyy
You're only going to figure out what you want by dating. Have your fun when you're young. Don't worry about long term relationships then when you're older you'll be ready to settle down & will have enough experience to know what you actually like.
You sir are a good honest man
Your self awareness is much appreciated...
Same bro
@Dustin Smith pretty much everyone is like that but most people are afraid to admit
Wasn't offended at all. "not in public" Spit my coffee all over my bed laughing. 😂🤣😂🤣😂 You two crack me up and can do no wrong in my eyes.
Who drinks coffee in bed though?
@@frenzorub me 😊
Fractured my tail bone so I'm resting and studying for my finals..in my bed lol
That's dumb to think, and is probably what the north Koreans think of their leader.
@@triskalion9627 mmk
@@amber9738 just to make sure I'm not misunderstood, I'm talking specifically about "can't do no wrongs in my eyes", that is bad to think.
It can start out as FWB, but usually someone has the feels, and most of the time someone is hanging in there hoping for a promotion.
My ex wasn't supportive and im sure just used me to experiment since she's gay now. We we're together for a year and she let me off the hook without a second thought. It broke my heart since i was the only one who was attached. It...hurt. haha
@@elisal318 sorry to hear that.
Dude just laughed it off, RIP bro😂
They all seem one sided relationship, even the most “balanced” one. That being the tall guy and short blond haired girl, they’re both seeing other people but he clearly doesn’t joy it or at least being told about it.
Dylan Carroll to be fair, I have a few guys I see semi regularly, it’s very clear we’re both seeing other people but I absolutely do not want to hear about the other women they’re sleeping with. It’s not because I expect our relationship to get more serious or anything, but I don’t want to think about them rolling around with someone else, I don’t want to wonder if I’m being compared or wonder if they were with someone else recently or whatever. Fully aware it happens, but I don’t want to see or hear about it. But I’m also someone who doesn’t find things like threesomes enjoyable because I don’t share
Victoria Christina add me to your list
I noticed men dont want to hear about it, but then get pissed when they find out. I personally think you should let the person know. Have had a few times where a girl got pissed at me because she was hooking up with the same guy as me. When I asked "I thought you guys were just hooking up, just he and I?" They would say yeah but and I would say "Oh then you need to get over those feelings, either find a boyfriend or dont play a game you cant play"
@@michellerichardson3090 i actually prefer to know, I don’t need to know every detail. But i think its important to keep shit honest and open.
That "8" is like my answer when a woman asks me how old I think they are. My answer is always "21", because nobody ever got slapped for telling a woman she looks 21... Lol
I tell them they look 8. Maybe I’m doing it wrong.
@@d-fens5866 - Well, you probably won't get slapped. You might get the cops called on you, but probably not slapped... Lol
Always tell the truth, don't be asking questions you don't want to hear the answer to.
@@JoeMamaCausesEarthquakes - I respect that. But I'm anti-social enough already. I don't need to add radical honesty to the mix... Lol
Maybe not slapped in the face by her, but a slap in the wrist from a copper
"Why do you think it would be bad for us to be in a committed relationship?"
How about, "because you're still looking for better options, a freedom I should be exercising."
"I love you" was her sidestepping her underlying abandonment issues.
You win the most authentic comment on here
Spot on.
This is so true, I’ve been on both sides of this coin and it’s stressful either way. The one in wait is constantly being discouraged and put down by the lack of desire. Meanwhile the one that’s is exploring constantly feels constrained.
Where’s the “doll?” I haven’t seen her in a while.
I was gonna say the same thing. I miss her
SIMP
lol jk
I was gonna ask too!
They're charging up tension for when they eventually need to release it
Lol
the white guy with the asian girl is like watching napoleon dynamite asking a girl out "gosh"
She was way better looking than him. He was so generic looking. That girl is cute but she might be crazy for him to turn her down like that.
@@eznosnopes5276 it's all about the personality and the way you carry yourself.
Maybe he was trying to conceal, don't feel. XD
He'll dump her for Suzy.
@@tmerchead1 if i had someone that liked me i would try to see why and im not good at understanding feelings but she looks kind but recording tells somethings you cant see in person like someone full of shit
My husband and I started as friends with benefits. It was so awesome. Then I got feelings. I didn’t want that or like that so I tried to bail. Didn’t know he already had feelings. I fought it like hell because that’s not what I wanted at the time. But didn’t want to lose his friendship. After much communication, I caved and we tried a committed relationship . 7 years and still going. He is still my best friend. Super glad I gave it a shot and didn’t just take off like my cold feet told me to lol
I am old enough to know that I am not built for casual sex. I always catch feelings. Besides, I don't want to have sex if I don't have (some) feelings, be it lust or something else.
Also, good for you both! Glad it had a happy ending (pun 100% intended)
I feel like preach should be a musician. I want a compilation of his random music genius moments😭
The producers are creeps. They try so hard to get people to expose themselves.
"Yeah no, I couldnt.."
*W H Y*
@@RikXtreme4 why do think??? Like, damn producers, chill
In a way I think it's good they do this. Sure one of the reasons the producers are probably doing is to get more viewers.
But it does force in a way the participants to face some important issues that it looks like they haven't dealt with. Also helps viewers get an objective view. We see them, ca offer advice, counsel and learn from their mistakes or bad decisions.
It would probably be better doing something like this in like therapy though but what fwb would go on therapy? well one of the fwb can go to therapy and think about what they should do about their feelings regarding the relationship
On the bright side one of the fwb decided to make it more than fwb.
@@maryanne2025 Adding in the alcohol ups the creep factor.
There's somethinn bout that Smile- New single by Aba and Preach
coming soon
"An untold story maybe..." and let's not forget about the bonus single, "One-sided relationship" lol
This is about to be stuck in my head all day 😂
Yo Preach make it happen
“Better to be lonely and real with yourself than fake and with someone who doesn’t really want you.”
Truth punch to the gut.
I love the way you say stuff Aba. Life needs more brutal honesty.
I agree, "Never make someone your priority while you're their option." When you know you're their option that's not going to change, STEP!
It's so uncomfortable watching two people try to communicate when they're not on the same page. Just ends up leaving the person who's ready to commit hurt and upset cause the other person isn't brave enough to let them move on to someone else.
"I know where we live in this new age where everyone wants to be open ... A lot of people are not cut out for it and IT'S OKAY but be honest with yourselves. Better to be lonely and real with yourself than be fake and with someone who doesn't really want you". This hit me, as a guy, you're expected to always be talking to women and having casual sex. I tried and for me it wasn't comfortable at all. Sex, for me, is about love, not just pleasure. I should be more comfortable with being on my own until I find someone I care instead of trying to be someone I'm not. I think it's just excepting that I'm just not the type of person who can have a casual fling but because I'm not, I get looked down upon by others who insult me and think it's weird.
All facts bro
You cannot spend “time” with your benefit. Casual isn’t everyday.
There's always one person in these fwb relationships that low key wanna commit while the other one clearly doesn't.