I know a lot of people who rushed to intimacy (emotional as well as physical) before they really knew the person that they liked. I have done that, too. It often ends with bitterness and hostility. Had they, myself included, taken the time to allow the friendship to mature, they might have been friends. But with the bitterness of a failed romance, that is unlikely. People who are like that are too impatient for forming healthy relationships.
This is the reason why people get attached so easily as sharing too many personal informations or having too much deep convos is like sharing a deeper part of you, which is supposed to be shared with your future spouse... Now I know where I keep falling into the trap of giving my heart away too soon... Commitment first before any type of intimacy (physical, emotional, spritual). We must always be on guard and keep our boundaries (physical, emotional, spiritual) firm to avoid unnecessary heartache.
"Show me your friends and I'll tell you who you are." So true. That proverb has saved my butt many a time. It's amazing how much you can predict about a person just based on the company that they keep...
lol that constant communication! You have to pace and schedule. When I was dating my previous girlfriend, our first month of dating we exchanged over 1000 texts! Like, I have never in my life exchanged that many texts with anyone before. On top of that, we went from talking on the phone/skype for an hour a week to like 5 hours a week. While it was a long distance relationship (we lived about 4 hours away from each other), this amount of interaction did become unhealthy and we both divulged emotion-driven information to each other that we would not have otherwise done. Also, we became dependent on each other for validation and affirmation in ways that were not healthy. Make sure you pace it. If there is any part of a relationship that you must be intentional about, it is the amount of time you spend with a person, especially if you are romantically interested. That's my $0.02 worth.
Emotional promiscuity sounded to me like when a person is emotionally deeply connected to several people at a time. Every video here is very interesting.
I have heard it said by a Rabbi teacher:. Dating is completely selfish. You do not owe him anything. The reason why you are meeting him is to see if something bothers you about him. If it does, there's no 2nd date. Whereas marriage is completely unselfish. In fact, he said you have every right to be selfish when you're saying. You don't owe each other anything. In fact, he says NOT to share intimacy with a date. Intimacy is reserved for marriage. He says you want to marry someone easy to love. I feel too many people today focus on connecting deeply emotionally when they date, and that's where they get into trouble, as you said. We need to guard our hearts when dating, for out of it come the issues of life. Proverbs 4:23. We are just trying to see if they are our husband or not? Hopefully we will have good news! 💖💖💖
A great vid, Mark. Some things I've not considered. I have a tendency to overshare (usually in an effort to be relatable & vulnerable), but we must be wise in what we share, with whom & in what context. Thanks again! 👍👑💖
@Tyler Gibson Perfectly understandable & relatable, brother. And the sad truth is that sharing the wrong thing with the wrong person...i.e. a spiritually/emotionally/psychologically/socially unwell individual...can be a world of pain. Be wise, be well, be blessed! 🛐😊🕊
Hmm idk I definitely want to know everything about my partner before I marry. Marriage is for life and want to know exactly what I'm getting myself into and whom I'm marrying. I think couples should be upfront not all at once but definitely before marriage comes to play. Its all about trust.
Kevin B In that case, I would rely on the old saying "actions speak louder than words." Because you can tell who a person truly is by their actions more than by their words. If they show fruit bearing in many areas of your life with all sorts of people (i.e. not just being nice or patient only whenever you're around) then you know you can trust the person. Besides, it's impossible to know absolutely everything about someone even when you are married. People are always changing and you're always learning new things about the other; especially when you live together. Also, time reveals the true nature of the heart. Give the relationship enough time for you two to figure out whether getting into a marriage would work.
You're either trusting God to lead you to the right woman or not. That process shouldn't involve thoroughly exploring every potential woman, building soul ties, and getting hopes up. Just ask God about her! He knows everyone's heart. Read how God found a wife for Isaac in Genesis 24. Proverbs 18:22 NLT The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord.
Thank you for this video. I never knew that emotional promiscuity existed. I am learning something new everyday! Thank you for the great and informatove content on this channel!
I’m entering a season of transition from friendship to dating and I noticed I was getting too emotionally inclined too quickly. This video spoke directly to my situation and I learned so much. Thank you for being a faithful vessel of truth
Literally been struggling with this and feeling the conviction of it. It’s so easy to disassociate yourself from messaging through social media, no matter how innocent it seems. Thank you!
Hi Mark! I remember seeing one of your videos and I suggested about emotional purity. Thank you very much for your wisdom in sharing this. Discernment and seeking the Lord prove it. Indeed commitment is very important ‘’Quantity vs. Quality’’ . May the Lord bless you more!
Glad you enjoy that Frankline B, i consider myself a writer first :) Video is a powerful tool but writing comes most natural to me, I also find it easier to share more Bible in writing. God bless!
1)Understand the power of emotions, and be cautious about sharing them. 2)"Speed kills"-Be patient. 3) Focus more on the quality of the commitment rather than the quantity of contact. 4) Know that they will resemble their friends whether you see it in them or not.
I agree with you completely about setting boundaries in your life with people and how to live your life ,and also how to avoid divorce by preparing for marriage properly and not lraying for an idol also as its explained to us in tbe bible. You make these tbings easy to understand and Mark you speak Gods word beautifully. God bless. 💖💖
I just needed this so bad! God just knows the right time! Thank you and bless you for posting this video. My boyfriend just wants to be constantly texting and phoning me and I feel like this is tearing us apart. We are in a long distance relationship and I took some days off chatting to find my real feelings and to really find if god wants this for us. He also wants to go too fast and is already thinking of marrying and moving in togheter and I am constantly telling him to be patient and just go on and wait for what God has for us and is showing us. Please pray for our relationship! God is giving me the hints I asked for, but I need some more confirmation. We took some time from chatting and I am feeling much better, before I was always stressed because I don't like to be on the phone that much. Also it's much better to have a deep conversation once in a while than to constantly talk about what we are doing. I feel like he was getting too attached to me and it was/is breaking us apart. When we are togheter in real life it's so different because we barely look at our phone and do fun things togheter. I pray and I have hope Jesus and God are working on our hearts for better. Thank you for reading all of this! God bless you!
I would love for you to talk about other topica that would help Christians prepare for a healthy, monogamous relationship! How do you deal with attractions to someone else when you're already in a relationship? How do you deal with unfaithfulness and what kind of people are more likely to cheat? And on the contrary, what kind of people are far more likely to have successful long-term marriages? I find your content very helpful for bringing a Biblically grounded perspective on romance and marriage, and I definitely look forward to more in the future!
This is so timely, Mark because you made me find the answer to what I did to two guys in my cellgroup. I didn't know that there was emotional promiscuity. And I am a person who lacks seeing my friends face to face, I Whatsapp them or Facebook them most of the time. I tend to confess what I don't say face to face, yes! I really need to be careful.
Hi brother! I am very grateful to God for how he uses you to help people understand how to apply his holy word to our life and that's what I precisely like about it, how biblical you always try to be regarding to the topics you bring on. So praise God! I also would like to hear some counseling from you about the biblical perspective on the topic of long distance relationships. Thank you very much. May God bless you!
Amen Elias geraldo, I plan to do a video on that w Bethany since we long distance dated.... here's an article I wrote for now :) applygodsword.com/christian-dating-advice-on-long-distance-relationships/
I love your video's. I believe this message relates to me on an emotional level because I met or was approached by a guy on the beach, I was not expecting it but I found myself getting very emotionally connected to him, he was in close proximity to me whiIe talking but I wasn't put off by it, he started talking about his past relationship and being cheated on, he then got close to God and started speaking at churches.I revealed to him that I had been widowed for three years then he ask me was I ready to move on and I said yes the feelings that I was feeling in that moment was very intense and I became scared he hinted around on getting my info but was afraid and didnt. That happen a month ago and I've been thinking about him since then , I'm super picky and protective because I have young children so I usually say no but this felt different.
Hi Mark, Instead of the platinum hits playlist, could you please make a playlist with all your videos on boundaries so we can easily play them from the earliest to latest? That would be great and help loads!!! :)
Thank you again Mark! This really confirms my choice not to choose internet dating. I tried once because of one person’s advice & it failed. #3 was definitely in that one for me but got myself out of it because he was too good to be true. 😇🙏🏻
This is so true. I've experienced this social media attachment. I thought it was cool that I could speak to this person constantly on the internet until it became a daily thing. I didn't fell too deep but it leaves some kind of emotional thing when you see that person again. NOT something I'll recommend.
Talking about distant future like marriage when marriage is nowhere in site, talking about raising a family together when you are not even close to that, talking too much about deep hurts in your past . . . things like that :)
Yes! Emotions do play key roles into shaping who we become to be! Most people tend to follow their heart, while others suppress their emotions and let their head do the talking. I agree that you must acknowledge your emotions, but not let them control you. Patience is a virtue! This is probably why God in the past has allowed small talk not even once a week between me and my sp. There is so much I want to say to and learn about this person, but I need God's timing. Point 3 is my fav! Technology does allow more intimate connections, and feels easier to talk over a phone. Which is why I pay attention to the way I voice things and make sure it sounds like something I'd say in person. The second chunk of this point is my fav though! It is not about the quantity of conversations, but the quality! So good! Also my sp has mainly good, supportive, respectable friends as far as I see at church.
I am so glad for this video. I recently started talking to someone, and he is very open emotionally, where I am trying to keep my guard up and be discerning on what to share. I think he is just very excited to talk to me, and I start to tumble in to that as well. My question is, how do you help slow the other person down when they are so incredibly open to sharing, and you are wanting to set boundaries (we've been talking for two weeks). Any brother or sister in Christ with advice is greatly appreciated! Also, this video was great thank you!
If I were him and a women tells me to slow down I will understand and respect her , because there's still alot of things to know about each other first . And it is a good sign for a women to say slowdown because if she rushes too means she's open to any man .
Thank you so much for the advice. We just got engaged yesterday! I would add too there needs to be a balance. Yes, be emotionally on your guard, but not so much that you don’t get to really know a person. I am so grateful for how vulnerable and loving he is with me, and it took me some time to get used to that, and open up in that way as well. I’m so glad I did, when I was ready of course. Good luck out there everyone!
Local churches told my generation not to have premarital sex. #2 The bible instructs believers to marry 1st. Perhaps we fail to hear. Perhaps we fail to LISTEN.
1 Corinthians 9:27 King James Version (KJV) 27 But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.
From whole person counseling website. Many people come to me for counsel wanting to train their flesh, trying to break various habits. They want to train their bodies not to overeat. They want to train their minds to think the right thoughts, their wills to make strong positive decisions, and their emotions to feel good at the right time. Almost everywhere we go, those in authority teach us some method of training the flesh. We are taught to train the flesh at home, school, work, and sometimes even at church. It's up to you to keep onboard. Implant righteous living in your mind and you will never depart from your righteous goals. I wouldn't rather have been like most Muslim women whom only have one sexual partners in lifetime. Although I wouldn't have desired to be a Muslim or marry a Muslim man. Muslim women are know for being chaste and preserving their virginity until after marriage.
ApplyGodsWord.com/Mark Ballenger yes sir it was me! Thank you Mark! God Bless you brother. Your welcome to use any of it to do his will! May it be useful for someone else to continue to grow to be more like Him!
The often unhealthy excessive revealing of emotions over public social media can be terribly damaging. All things in moderation can refer to applying emotion appropriately as well.
this is for me. but I have crossed my emotional boundaries with my girlfriend and we broke up few months back., I am not able to bare the pain since I crossed my emotional boundaries and went too far emotionally. soo., can you please tell me how to overcome that and be happy for myself. I need God's help right now. if there's any way please suggest me. I don't want this to happen in my life again. please help me how to overcome.
I watched the video but I still don't understand this concept. So what IS appropriate to share? How could I possibly know anything about the other person if he's not sharing things about himself enough?
Anytime someone desires a relationship with a person/people more than an intimate relationship with JESUS CHRIST, then they're gonna cross emotional and/or sexual boundaries and damage hearts, bodies, and souls - including their own! #idolatry #adultery Exodus 34:14 NLT You must worship no other gods, for the Lord, whose very name is Jealous, is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you. Proverbs 4:23 NLT Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. Philippians 4:6-7 NLT Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. JESUS: "These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need." (Matthew 6:32-33 NLT) John 4:1-30, 39-42 NLT Jesus knew the Pharisees had heard that he was baptizing and making more disciples than John (though Jesus himself didn’t baptize them-his disciples did). So he left Judea and returned to Galilee. He had to go through Samaria on the way. Eventually he came to the Samaritan village of Sychar, near the field that Jacob gave to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there; and Jesus, tired from the long walk, sat wearily beside the well about noontime. Soon a Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, “Please give me a drink.” He was alone at the time because his disciples had gone into the village to buy some food. The woman was surprised, for Jews refuse to have anything to do with Samaritans. She said to Jesus, “You are a Jew, and I am a Samaritan woman. Why are you asking me for a drink?” Jesus replied, “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.” “But sir, you don’t have a rope or a bucket,” she said, “and this well is very deep. Where would you get this living water? And besides, do you think you’re greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well? How can you offer better water than he and his sons and his animals enjoyed?” Jesus replied, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.” “Please, sir,” the woman said, “give me this water! Then I’ll never be thirsty again, and I won’t have to come here to get water.” “Go and get your husband,” Jesus told her. “I don’t have a husband,” the woman replied. Jesus said, “You’re right! You don’t have a husband- for you have had five husbands, and you aren’t even married to the man you’re living with now. You certainly spoke the truth!” “Sir,” the woman said, “you must be a prophet. So tell me, why is it that you Jews insist that Jerusalem is the only place of worship, while we Samaritans claim it is here at Mount Gerizim, where our ancestors worshiped?” Jesus replied, “Believe me, dear woman, the time is coming when it will no longer matter whether you worship the Father on this mountain or in Jerusalem. You Samaritans know very little about the one you worship, while we Jews know all about him, for salvation comes through the Jews. But the time is coming-indeed it’s here now-when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The Father is looking for those who will worship him that way. For God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.” The woman said, “I know the Messiah is coming-the one who is called Christ. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.” Then Jesus told her, “I AM the Messiah!” Just then his disciples came back. They were shocked to find him talking to a woman, but none of them had the nerve to ask, “What do you want with her?” or “Why are you talking to her?” The woman left her water jar beside the well and ran back to the village, telling everyone, “Come and see a man who told me everything I ever did! Could he possibly be the Messiah?” So the people came streaming from the village to see him... Many Samaritans from the village believed in Jesus because the woman had said, “He told me everything I ever did!” When they came out to see him, they begged him to stay in their village. So he stayed for two days, long enough for many more to hear his message and believe. Then they said to the woman, “Now we believe, not just because of what you told us, but because we have heard him ourselves. Now we know that he is indeed the Savior of the world.”
When you say quantety vs. commitement,, do you mean on the long run are we commited to be with eachother? Btw thx i'm in a relationship with one person few mothes now and this is helping me a lot.
1)Understand the power of emotions, and be cautious about sharing them. 2)"Speed kills"-Be patient. 3) Focus more on the quality of the commitment rather than the quantity of contact. 4) Know that they will resemble their friends whether you see it in them or not.
I know a lot of people who rushed to intimacy (emotional as well as physical) before they really knew the person that they liked. I have done that, too. It often ends with bitterness and hostility. Had they, myself included, taken the time to allow the friendship to mature, they might have been friends. But with the bitterness of a failed romance, that is unlikely. People who are like that are too impatient for forming healthy relationships.
This is the reason why people get attached so easily as sharing too many personal informations or having too much deep convos is like sharing a deeper part of you, which is supposed to be shared with your future spouse... Now I know where I keep falling into the trap of giving my heart away too soon... Commitment first before any type of intimacy (physical, emotional, spritual). We must always be on guard and keep our boundaries (physical, emotional, spiritual) firm to avoid unnecessary heartache.
"Show me your friends and I'll tell you who you are."
So true. That proverb has saved my butt many a time. It's amazing how much you can predict about a person just based on the company that they keep...
Very true yuhz1m1
I swear...every video you post is RIGHT ON TIME! This was SO timely!
So glad this was timely! God bless :)
Indeed!
Haha for me to
This was on time for me today. Thank you Mark for being led by God!
For me too!!
lol that constant communication! You have to pace and schedule. When I was dating my previous girlfriend, our first month of dating we exchanged over 1000 texts! Like, I have never in my life exchanged that many texts with anyone before. On top of that, we went from talking on the phone/skype for an hour a week to like 5 hours a week. While it was a long distance relationship (we lived about 4 hours away from each other), this amount of interaction did become unhealthy and we both divulged emotion-driven information to each other that we would not have otherwise done. Also, we became dependent on each other for validation and affirmation in ways that were not healthy.
Make sure you pace it. If there is any part of a relationship that you must be intentional about, it is the amount of time you spend with a person, especially if you are romantically interested. That's my $0.02 worth.
This is such a great reminder! Lord help me!
Emotional promiscuity sounded to me like when a person is emotionally deeply connected to several people at a time. Every video here is very interesting.
Quantity of communication vs. quality of commitment.
I have heard it said by a Rabbi teacher:. Dating is completely selfish. You do not owe him anything. The reason why you are meeting him is to see if something bothers you about him. If it does, there's no 2nd date. Whereas marriage is completely unselfish. In fact, he said you have every right to be selfish when you're saying. You don't owe each other anything. In fact, he says NOT to share intimacy with a date. Intimacy is reserved for marriage. He says you want to marry someone easy to love. I feel too many people today focus on connecting deeply emotionally when they date, and that's where they get into trouble, as you said.
We need to guard our hearts when dating, for out of it come the issues of life. Proverbs 4:23.
We are just trying to see if they are our husband or not? Hopefully we will have good news! 💖💖💖
I like what you said about being more "selfish" in dating and "unselfish" in marriage. That makes a lot of sense Trish Garofalo
A great vid, Mark. Some things I've not considered. I have a tendency to overshare (usually in an effort to be relatable & vulnerable), but we must be wise in what we share, with whom & in what context. Thanks again! 👍👑💖
Good point Disa Jardine
For me, all your lessons came far too late 😢
@Tyler Gibson Perfectly understandable & relatable, brother. And the sad truth is that sharing the wrong thing with the wrong person...i.e. a spiritually/emotionally/psychologically/socially unwell individual...can be a world of pain. Be wise, be well, be blessed! 🛐😊🕊
I’m definitely an oversharer for the same reasons, I’m trying to slow down 😅
Hmm idk I definitely want to know everything about my partner before I marry. Marriage is for life and want to know exactly what I'm getting myself into and whom I'm marrying. I think couples should be upfront not all at once but definitely before marriage comes to play. Its all about trust.
Kevin B In that case, I would rely on the old saying "actions speak louder than words."
Because you can tell who a person truly is by their actions more than by their words. If they show fruit bearing in many areas of your life with all sorts of people (i.e. not just being nice or patient only whenever you're around) then you know you can trust the person.
Besides, it's impossible to know absolutely everything about someone even when you are married. People are always changing and you're always learning new things about the other; especially when you live together.
Also, time reveals the true nature of the heart. Give the relationship enough time for you two to figure out whether getting into a marriage would work.
To each their own but marriage is forever you have to know them well.
You're either trusting God to lead you to the right woman or not. That process shouldn't involve thoroughly exploring every potential woman, building soul ties, and getting hopes up. Just ask God about her! He knows everyone's heart. Read how God found a wife for Isaac in Genesis 24.
Proverbs 18:22 NLT
The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord.
Thank you for this video. I never knew that emotional promiscuity existed. I am learning something new everyday! Thank you for the great and informatove content on this channel!
I’m entering a season of transition from friendship to dating and I noticed I was getting too emotionally inclined too quickly.
This video spoke directly to my situation and I learned so much. Thank you for being a faithful vessel of truth
I had to click in..Like Holy Spirit tell me to come.
Literally been struggling with this and feeling the conviction of it. It’s so easy to disassociate yourself from messaging through social media, no matter how innocent it seems. Thank you!
Well said Jordon Haslem
He has some seriously powerful points wow
So glad this was useful Joanna N. Boxill
This was excellent. Especially the comment on the quantity of time vs the quality of commitment- that is next level. Thank you for sharing.
I'm so glad you enjoyed this :)
Hi Mark! I remember seeing one of your videos and I suggested about emotional purity. Thank you very much for your wisdom in sharing this. Discernment and seeking the Lord prove it. Indeed commitment is very important ‘’Quantity vs. Quality’’ . May the Lord bless you more!
Amen Starlene Joy Plaga, we must seek to honor the Lord in all areas. Thanks for your feedback and God bless!
I love how you attach an article in ur blog to each video, it’s really amazing!! I love to read so that works really well for me! God bless u🙏🏽
Glad you enjoy that Frankline B, i consider myself a writer first :) Video is a powerful tool but writing comes most natural to me, I also find it easier to share more Bible in writing. God bless!
1)Understand the power of emotions, and be cautious about sharing them. 2)"Speed kills"-Be patient. 3) Focus more on the quality of the commitment rather than the quantity of contact. 4) Know that they will resemble their friends whether you see it in them or not.
Wow that was spot on! Thank you! This for sure isn't a problem that's talked about much, so it's good that you brought it up.
I agree, it's not talked about too much from what I've seen. God bless!
What do you do, when both of you have crossed some emotional boundaries, and it got both of you hurt? This video definitely applies to me.
I agree with you completely about setting boundaries in your life with people and how to live your life ,and also how to avoid divorce by preparing for marriage properly and not lraying for an idol also as its explained to us in tbe bible. You make these tbings easy to understand and Mark you speak Gods word beautifully. God bless. 💖💖
I just needed this so bad! God just knows the right time! Thank you and bless you for posting this video. My boyfriend just wants to be constantly texting and phoning me and I feel like this is tearing us apart. We are in a long distance relationship and I took some days off chatting to find my real feelings and to really find if god wants this for us. He also wants to go too fast and is already thinking of marrying and moving in togheter and I am constantly telling him to be patient and just go on and wait for what God has for us and is showing us. Please pray for our relationship! God is giving me the hints I asked for, but I need some more confirmation. We took some time from chatting and I am feeling much better, before I was always stressed because I don't like to be on the phone that much. Also it's much better to have a deep conversation once in a while than to constantly talk about what we are doing. I feel like he was getting too attached to me and it was/is breaking us apart. When we are togheter in real life it's so different because we barely look at our phone and do fun things togheter. I pray and I have hope Jesus and God are working on our hearts for better. Thank you for reading all of this! God bless you!
Amen Bea Werder, so glad the Lord used this and it was timely for you! God bless :)
Hope you got the clarity you needed.
I would love for you to talk about other topica that would help Christians prepare for a healthy, monogamous relationship!
How do you deal with attractions to someone else when you're already in a relationship?
How do you deal with unfaithfulness and what kind of people are more likely to cheat?
And on the contrary, what kind of people are far more likely to have successful long-term marriages?
I find your content very helpful for bringing a Biblically grounded perspective on romance and marriage, and I definitely look forward to more in the future!
This is so timely, Mark because you made me find the answer to what I did to two guys in my cellgroup. I didn't know that there was emotional promiscuity. And I am a person who lacks seeing my friends face to face, I Whatsapp them or Facebook them most of the time. I tend to confess what I don't say face to face, yes! I really need to be careful.
Amen Sandra Van Den Driesen, great self assessment
Sooo enlightening and eye opening! Thank you for sharing your God given wisdom to help us date better, Mark!
God bless you brother
Hi brother! I am very grateful to God for how he uses you to help people understand how to apply his holy word to our life and that's what I precisely like about it, how biblical you always try to be regarding to the topics you bring on. So praise God!
I also would like to hear some counseling from you about the biblical perspective on the topic of long distance relationships. Thank you very much. May God bless you!
Amen Elias geraldo, I plan to do a video on that w Bethany since we long distance dated.... here's an article I wrote for now :) applygodsword.com/christian-dating-advice-on-long-distance-relationships/
Thanks a lot for answering. I will definitely read your article.
I didn't know this existed... How I needed this so bad... Thank you for existing Mark 👆
My pleasure sillyquerky lover, so glad it was helpful :)
I love your video's. I believe this message relates to me on an emotional level because I met or was approached by a guy on the beach, I was not expecting it but I found myself getting very emotionally connected to him, he was in close proximity to me whiIe talking but I wasn't put off by it, he started talking about his past relationship and being cheated on, he then got close to God and started speaking at churches.I revealed to him that I had been widowed for three years then he ask me was I ready to move on and I said yes the feelings that I was feeling in that moment was very intense and I became scared he hinted around on getting my info but was afraid and didnt. That happen a month ago and I've been thinking about him since then , I'm super picky and protective because I have young children so I usually say no but this felt different.
Thank you for sharing 🙏
It makes a lot of sense now
Mark, God has bless you with so much Wisdom. Thanks for sharing this. Just what i needed to hear 🙏
AKA soul ties
Debbie Cakes87, I hope to talk about that soon :)
ApplyGodsWord.com/Mark Ballenger look up RC Blakes, he has Alot on the topic that I feel is very accurate
Hi Mark, Instead of the platinum hits playlist, could you please make a playlist with all your videos on boundaries so we can easily play them from the earliest to latest? That would be great and help loads!!! :)
Thank you again Mark! This really confirms my choice not to choose internet dating. I tried once because of one person’s advice & it failed. #3 was definitely in that one for me but got myself out of it because he was too good to be true. 😇🙏🏻
I'm so glad you found the video helpful :)
This is so true. I've experienced this social media attachment. I thought it was cool that I could speak to this person constantly on the internet until it became a daily thing. I didn't fell too deep but it leaves some kind of emotional thing when you see that person again. NOT something I'll recommend.
Amen Mark, this topic MUST be taken into account ALWAYS
“Quantity of your communication vs the Quality of your commitment”. So good
Legit hit me
I didn’t even know this existed.......
Hey Ivonne Vadi, glad to hear this was useful to you :)
when afairs happen they can be 1) emotional 2) pysical 3) both. - and often in that order and each one as damaging as the last!
This is very interesting. Thank God for using you Mark!!
Thanks for the encouragement R Tr
Didn't even think about this! But wow thank you for sharing cause it really opened my eyes on how to handle relationships that could lead to marriage.
Amen 천사 , glad it was helpful :)
Thanks, Mark! My cellgroup leader has never told me this.
Best video ever. The advice about friends is 100% true for me
Wow! Didn’t know about this ,thank you this is an eye opener for me.
Speed kills...that's excellent✨
Tyra Rice amen
Quantity vs Quality of communication. This was important for me to hear today. Thank you 😊
Always on time, thank you Mark, such a blessing 🙏🙏🙏
Thanks Mark! I was thinking about this today.
I love it when things are right on time :)
This is such a good video 😊I would like to ask the question of what are some concise examples of promiscuity behaviour on conversations?
Talking about distant future like marriage when marriage is nowhere in site, talking about raising a family together when you are not even close to that, talking too much about deep hurts in your past . . . things like that :)
awesome 😊thank you !!!
Wow! So much truth in this. Thank you, Mark!
Very good advice from the Teachings.
Def. Needed this. God bless you Mark!
My pleasure mountainonahill
Good word brother. Eye openers 👁
this. was. fire.
All facts coming straight from God’s word and principles🔥
Yes! Emotions do play key roles into shaping who we become to be! Most people tend to follow their heart, while others suppress their emotions and let their head do the talking. I agree that you must acknowledge your emotions, but not let them control you. Patience is a virtue! This is probably why God in the past has allowed small talk not even once a week between me and my sp. There is so much I want to say to and learn about this person, but I need God's timing. Point 3 is my fav! Technology does allow more intimate connections, and feels easier to talk over a phone. Which is why I pay attention to the way I voice things and make sure it sounds like something I'd say in person. The second chunk of this point is my fav though! It is not about the quantity of conversations, but the quality! So good! Also my sp has mainly good, supportive, respectable friends as far as I see at church.
Very nice discussion, sir mark.. Thank you so much... Ive learned a lot... God bless
I am so glad for this video. I recently started talking to someone, and he is very open emotionally, where I am trying to keep my guard up and be discerning on what to share. I think he is just very excited to talk to me, and I start to tumble in to that as well. My question is, how do you help slow the other person down when they are so incredibly open to sharing, and you are wanting to set boundaries (we've been talking for two weeks). Any brother or sister in Christ with advice is greatly appreciated! Also, this video was great thank you!
If I were him and a women tells me to slow down I will understand and respect her , because there's still alot of things to know about each other first . And it is a good sign for a women to say slowdown because if she rushes too means she's open to any man .
Thank you so much for the advice. We just got engaged yesterday!
I would add too there needs to be a balance. Yes, be emotionally on your guard, but not so much that you don’t get to really know a person. I am so grateful for how vulnerable and loving he is with me, and it took me some time to get used to that, and open up in that way as well. I’m so glad I did, when I was ready of course. Good luck out there everyone!
Wow this video was so beneficial, I really needed to hear this, thank you so much
I'm so glad it was helpful!
Thank you ! Brother very helpful.
God bless You
WOW....LOL I noticed it topics are so risky and cutting edge ,things the local church never mentions.
thx
Queen SAAvY Yes or even your cellgroup leader doesn't mention too.
Glad this was helpful
Local churches told my generation not to have premarital sex. #2 The bible instructs believers to marry 1st. Perhaps we fail to hear. Perhaps we fail to LISTEN.
1 Corinthians 9:27 King James Version (KJV)
27 But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.
From whole person counseling website.
Many people come to me for counsel wanting to train their flesh, trying to break various habits. They want to train their bodies not to overeat. They want to train their minds to think the right thoughts, their wills to make strong positive decisions, and their emotions to feel good at the right time. Almost everywhere we go, those in authority teach us some method of training the flesh. We are taught to train the flesh at home, school, work, and sometimes even at church.
It's up to you to keep onboard. Implant righteous living in your mind and you will never depart from your righteous goals. I wouldn't rather have been like most Muslim women whom only have one sexual partners in lifetime. Although I wouldn't have desired to be a Muslim or marry a Muslim man. Muslim women are know for being chaste and preserving their virginity until after marriage.
Great word thank you 🙌🏻🌞
You are so welcome!
Yup thanks HOLY SPIRIT
Be blessed brother in Christ 👑👑👑
Hallelujah may Father LORD JESUS CHRIST bless me with soul mate AMEN 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Such a good video!God bless you Mark!
Gosh, then I've crossed the emotional boundary lots of times. Though when I was in a relationship I didn't have eyes for anyone else.
So real - right on the mark
Glad you enjoyed it Alfred,
-Mark
Thank you so much, this is my biggest struggle
You are welcome, I'm glad this was helpful to you
Thank you. So needed
This was REALLY good and helped put things in perspective.
Amen! So glad it was helpful :)
Great message brother Mark!
Thanks Mike C., God bless :) if you are the same Mike C. who emailed me I plan on responding soon, sorry for the delay :)
ApplyGodsWord.com/Mark Ballenger yes sir it was me! Thank you Mark! God Bless you brother. Your welcome to use any of it to do his will! May it be useful for someone else to continue to grow to be more like Him!
This is important to khow thank you for the video God bless😊
Great video. Please may you give an example?
Thank u so much for this video ! It makes sense, totally. It is only now that I realise certain things ;) You’re awesome.
Great video.
this has helped me so much Mark. Thank you. God bless :)
Excellent info. Thank you.
My pleasure Judith Rios!
Right on time! Thank you
Great video! Point about Internet so on point
The often unhealthy excessive revealing of emotions over public social media can be terribly damaging. All things in moderation can refer to applying emotion appropriately as well.
Right on point! Ty
Claudia Saurez 👍
XLNT points....thank you
Great topic!
River Plum 👍
Very good advice
Lyn Mosley 👍
Hey Mark, do you have any practical examples of what is too far when is comes to sharing person information and emotions, desires etc.
Hi Mark, I would appreciate the vid more if you have more examples on the topic that can lead to emotional promiscuity. :)
Thanks for the feedback
Love it mate
Thanks Ben! Glad it was enjoyable :)
Thanks Mark👍👍
this is for me.
but I have crossed my emotional boundaries with my girlfriend and we broke up few months back., I am not able to bare the pain since I crossed my emotional boundaries and went too far emotionally.
soo., can you please tell me how to overcome that and be happy for myself.
I need God's help right now.
if there's any way please suggest me.
I don't want this to happen in my life again.
please help me how to overcome.
I watched the video but I still don't understand this concept. So what IS appropriate to share? How could I possibly know anything about the other person if he's not sharing things about himself enough?
Thank you.
great advice👍
Being too friendly with the opposite sex. Best friends. Work on patience.
so true
Amen!
This is good.
Natalie Ohlsson 👍
Sooo on point
Anytime someone desires a relationship with a person/people more than an intimate relationship with JESUS CHRIST, then they're gonna cross emotional and/or sexual boundaries and damage hearts, bodies, and souls - including their own! #idolatry #adultery
Exodus 34:14 NLT
You must worship no other gods, for the Lord, whose very name is Jealous, is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you.
Proverbs 4:23 NLT
Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.
Philippians 4:6-7 NLT
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
JESUS: "These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need."
(Matthew 6:32-33 NLT)
John 4:1-30, 39-42 NLT
Jesus knew the Pharisees had heard that he was baptizing and making more disciples than John (though Jesus himself didn’t baptize them-his disciples did). So he left Judea and returned to Galilee. He had to go through Samaria on the way. Eventually he came to the Samaritan village of Sychar, near the field that Jacob gave to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there; and Jesus, tired from the long walk, sat wearily beside the well about noontime. Soon a Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, “Please give me a drink.”
He was alone at the time because his disciples had gone into the village to buy some food. The woman was surprised, for Jews refuse to have anything to do with Samaritans. She said to Jesus, “You are a Jew, and I am a Samaritan woman. Why are you asking me for a drink?”
Jesus replied, “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.”
“But sir, you don’t have a rope or a bucket,” she said, “and this well is very deep. Where would you get this living water? And besides, do you think you’re greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well? How can you offer better water than he and his sons and his animals enjoyed?”
Jesus replied, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.”
“Please, sir,” the woman said, “give me this water! Then I’ll never be thirsty again, and I won’t have to come here to get water.”
“Go and get your husband,” Jesus told her. “I don’t have a husband,” the woman replied.
Jesus said, “You’re right! You don’t have a husband- for you have had five husbands, and you aren’t even married to the man you’re living with now. You certainly spoke the truth!”
“Sir,” the woman said, “you must be a prophet. So tell me, why is it that you Jews insist that Jerusalem is the only place of worship, while we Samaritans claim it is here at Mount Gerizim, where our ancestors worshiped?”
Jesus replied, “Believe me, dear woman, the time is coming when it will no longer matter whether you worship the Father on this mountain or in Jerusalem. You Samaritans know very little about the one you worship, while we Jews know all about him, for salvation comes through the Jews. But the time is coming-indeed it’s here now-when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The Father is looking for those who will worship him that way. For God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.”
The woman said, “I know the Messiah is coming-the one who is called Christ. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.”
Then Jesus told her, “I AM the Messiah!”
Just then his disciples came back. They were shocked to find him talking to a woman, but none of them had the nerve to ask, “What do you want with her?” or “Why are you talking to her?”
The woman left her water jar beside the well and ran back to the village, telling everyone, “Come and see a man who told me everything I ever did! Could he possibly be the Messiah?”
So the people came streaming from the village to see him...
Many Samaritans from the village believed in Jesus because the woman had said, “He told me everything I ever did!”
When they came out to see him, they begged him to stay in their village. So he stayed for two days, long enough for many more to hear his message and believe. Then they said to the woman, “Now we believe, not just because of what you told us, but because we have heard him ourselves. Now we know that he is indeed the Savior of the world.”
When you say quantety vs. commitement,, do you mean on the long run are we commited to be with eachother? Btw thx i'm in a relationship with one person few mothes now and this is helping me a lot.
1)Understand the power of emotions, and be cautious about sharing them.
2)"Speed kills"-Be patient.
3) Focus more on the quality of the commitment rather than the quantity of contact.
4) Know that they will resemble their friends whether you see it in them or not.
Thank you for posting this, it really helps me to see the main points all put together and I appreciate you taking the time to do that. :)
What makes attraction then?