You Are A Toxic Perfectionist

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ต.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 83

  • @renaigh
    @renaigh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +154

    "If I can't do it right, I'll never do it at all" - Me

    • @Waryfuls
      @Waryfuls 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Could not have said it better.

    • @yourbroskijack
      @yourbroskijack 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      WHY!!!!!?!!??!!!?!? Failure is BEUTIFUL!’nnnn!!!!!!

    • @elizabethwells3043
      @elizabethwells3043 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      School taught me that lesson. My teacher yelled at the "bad" kid, "You need to get it right the first time!"

    • @yourbroskijack
      @yourbroskijack 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@elizabethwells3043 THAS NOT RIGHT I don’t like that for you

    • @elizabethwells3043
      @elizabethwells3043 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@yourbroskijack thanks broski

  • @Joaquim-nz9vp
    @Joaquim-nz9vp 2 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    I really liked the difference you set between the idea and the practice of getting better. It's something I've been noticing over time, as in wanting to read books but never actually reading anything at all, for example. Loved the video!

    • @SarcasticQuokka
      @SarcasticQuokka 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yeah this really hit. Slowly learning this with my studies. You can sign up for the course and attend classes but if you don't get your work done you won't get the qualification.

  • @potatopotato5354
    @potatopotato5354 2 ปีที่แล้ว +75

    Something worth mentioning is that perfectionism running up against productivity is actually a conflict between two pretty negative outlooks. There is no obligation to be productive, and nobody should be guilted into producing things they're unhappy with. At the same time, perfectionism is pickiness in another form. You don't starve just because you can't have your favourite meal, and you shouldn't starve your need to create just because you can't make something perfect.

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      good point! my argument is largely driven by the way perfectionism has stifled me personally, but yours is a good perspective too.

    • @scary5455
      @scary5455 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      There is an obligation to be productive. All animals die without productivity.

    • @mehenyt
      @mehenyt 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      “you don’t starve just because you can’t have your favorite meal” will be my new life quote i love it so much

  • @Jerry_quesoso
    @Jerry_quesoso ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Amazing vid, there's something that I'd like to say which is that an episode of Courage the cowardly dog named "Perfection" represented how insidious this constant seek for perfectionism can be. You're left with nothing but concerns about yourself.

  • @nastyahvatalina4102
    @nastyahvatalina4102 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Your channel should have more subscribers, your videos are so good!

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Thank you so much!

  • @TomInTheSky2001
    @TomInTheSky2001 2 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    I think working to 80% of your effort is better than 100% if you can be more consistent. The last 20% takes way too long and might not be noticed. Plus the repetition will make your 80% surpass your old 100% quickly. I experienced this with my latest video and I finished it within a deadline instead of searching to create perfect clips. Before it would be take me ages because it 'Needed to be perfect'. But being imperfect is perfect in a way.

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Agreed!!

    • @Jaxan-dq2jy
      @Jaxan-dq2jy 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Wabi Sabi is perfect imperfection :)
      It is a beautiful idea

  • @Re9an
    @Re9an 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    WoW "chase consistency not progress" This is the most valuable thing I so needed to hear.
    i roll with Cptsd & adhd & am painfully self aware so valuable & helpful. Super glad to have already sub'd Thank you.

  • @jakers5139
    @jakers5139 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    your videos are always a treat

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Glad you think so!

  • @cooperjohnson5157
    @cooperjohnson5157 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I am grateful for your videos and the time you put into making them

  • @Qwerzxcv954
    @Qwerzxcv954 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I tend to overcomplicate things due to my perfectionism... As a result, I procrastinate a lot, I feel incompetent, worthless, and I am always unsatisfied with my life even when I do better than others.
    I always feel like "I'm not doing good enough" and that makes me anxious when I have to do thing I'm not used to do...
    Perfectionism can be very dangerous.

    • @imnotusingmyrealname4566
      @imnotusingmyrealname4566 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      If this is so obvious textbook stuff how did nobody see that in me and prevent me from becoming mentally ill💀

  • @PresKen3920
    @PresKen3920 24 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I just wanted to thank you for making your videos. They are not only thought provoking, well researched, centred, interesting, informative and well-made but they are also healing, encouraging, inspiring and genuine.
    I’ve struggled with BPD and ADHD my whole life with perfectionism being one of the most prevalent manifestations of my struggles. I am chronically unable to acknowledge my achievements, set helathy boundaries/goals/expectations for myself nor balance my work and life. I forever feel unworthy and never good enough because of my perfectionist mindset and it’s been an uphill journey trying to break free from it.
    Sometimes we just need something to be reframed in order for our brain to “click” and therefore experience a core mindset shift - the harbinger of lasting change. This video helped me recognise that my concept of progress was flawed and therefore a huge factor in my repeated cycle of suffering. Just being able to realise and acknowledge that thanks to the way you phrased it in this video has helped a lot.
    I am so appreciative that you bothered making videos in the first place in order for this actualisation to occur and I hope knowing that you’ve truly helped at least one person, intentionally or not, motivates you to continue making more videos. You are impacting people and making a difference with your videos. Your channel - nay, YOU - are a breath of fresh air amidst a polluted world. Thanks Fads ❤

  • @let_it_sin_kin
    @let_it_sin_kin 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I'll just leave it here.
    My insight was that my perfectionism came from PTSD. I always thought you have to go through something really terrible. But you can get PTSD just by the fact your parents didn't do what was needed to raise a healthy child. Maybe it's obvious for some, but definitely not me.
    Have a great life, everyone that reads this comment!
    Fads, thank you for your content, I really do like it a lot more than most popular channels that I'm subscribed to, because you put out vids on topics that many filmed about but you always add this uniquenness to the info, you always make me think about things from a different perspective! I value it a lot.

  • @novalinnhe
    @novalinnhe 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    The topic of perfectionism is so often approached from a very critical lens, but I almost teared up from how empathetically and sincerely you approached it here.
    I have immediately saved this video, and hope to rewatch it regularly to put some of your ideas and suggestions into practice. Especially looking to chase consistency instead of perfection - I really like this idea.
    Thanks so much!

  • @taniakallos1985
    @taniakallos1985 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Lately I’ve been watching some of your videos and have always been impressed by how compelling, relevant and succint your points were, but for me this video just takes the cake.
    Perfectionism is something I’ve always struggled with and it has become more and more apparent to me in the past few years that it is doing a great deal of damage. Your video helped put into words exactly what I was feeling. It helped me discover what’s going wrong and showed me a different perspective on the situation.
    Thank you very much for this video, it was just what I needed!

  • @gobble_gang
    @gobble_gang 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Amazing amounts of work went into this. While not even close to the type of videos I usually click on, here on TH-cam, I'm super glad I did. Pretty relevant topic for me since college started today lol. Reshaping how you manage yourself internally and externally seems multiplicities more integral to success now.

  • @martinmena-ospina6980
    @martinmena-ospina6980 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have a good feeling about this channel's future

  • @stevenlomon
    @stevenlomon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Your videos are slowly becoming some of my favorite to watch on this platform. Wholesome chill vibes but also profound and thoughtful, kudos! :D Also this is the best exploration and reflection on perfection I think I've ever seen

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thanks so much! Glad to hear it and I'm happy to hear you're enjoying em!

  • @jktech2117
    @jktech2117 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    your channel is chill and nice.. +1 sub!.. is hard to see someone talking about serious topics and staying in a good mood and upbeat

  • @finderskeepers8
    @finderskeepers8 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    "Progress is an action not an outcome." I love it.

  • @dinnerwithlydia
    @dinnerwithlydia ปีที่แล้ว

    Just subscribed. Amazing videos! In this one, the idea of chasing consistency rather than chasing an outcome-based idea of "progress" actually blew my mind in the best way! Thank you!

  • @proxicat123
    @proxicat123 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    "...and ask yourself: what do I think makes a person worthy of being loved and of being valuable?"
    I'll be thinking for an answer for this for the rest of the year which is precisely the reason as to why I love you and you're channel :D

  • @mony1809
    @mony1809 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I gotta say that this thumbnail is AMAZING!

  • @auraliax1323
    @auraliax1323 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks for talking about this topic, loved the video♥

  • @hectormaldonado9241
    @hectormaldonado9241 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Your channel really is my cup of tea, thanks for putting so much effort in your videos

  • @Justaz101
    @Justaz101 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Good video! As a perfectionist you addressed some great points that were helpful in my own life.

  • @TomInTheSky2001
    @TomInTheSky2001 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    First of all, Great Thumbnail!

  • @potapotapotapotapotapota
    @potapotapotapotapotapota 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Even the greatest number you can think becomes like nothing when compared to Infinity.

  • @cookiemaster537
    @cookiemaster537 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I really like your videos, feels like advice from a caring friend

  • @EduzReeveM
    @EduzReeveM ปีที่แล้ว

    I just found your channel and watched some of your videos and I like the way you talk and show off your ideas. plus for a 50k sub channel your content is really hq and I think youll grow quickly. hope you never run out of ideas brother :)

  • @ChickyNYC
    @ChickyNYC 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Yet again, great vid

  • @yourstrulytk12
    @yourstrulytk12 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    brother extremely excellent video.
    loved it. subscribed.

  • @garrisondinsmore5808
    @garrisondinsmore5808 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Amazing video, thank you! You explained some concepts I've never thought of before, and your delivery is calm and relaxing.

  • @garrettsgaming8300
    @garrettsgaming8300 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Perfect question to end the video. Well done!

  • @eliogilbert8071
    @eliogilbert8071 ปีที่แล้ว

    You're amazing. Thank You for this video ❤

  • @lucaskretschmann5307
    @lucaskretschmann5307 ปีที่แล้ว

    Bro your content is great, please keep it up

  • @smartideas-pedro1690
    @smartideas-pedro1690 ปีที่แล้ว

    great channel bruv, subbed for the brazil jersey

  • @djels6348
    @djels6348 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I just found this yt channel 20 mins ago & u know too much 🤣😂

  • @CalumRaasay
    @CalumRaasay 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great video! 👍🏻

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thanks so much!!! Cheers for the superthanks too

  • @Kirapsi
    @Kirapsi ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for this video! Very interesting

  • @NA21184
    @NA21184 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great work! Thanks for making this!!!

  • @l30S3UX
    @l30S3UX ปีที่แล้ว

    This video stil under 10k views so I just want to make sure you are listened and I love your scripts

  • @inderbirsingh3592
    @inderbirsingh3592 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    whoisfads? the goat

  • @noobuserlol4266
    @noobuserlol4266 ปีที่แล้ว

    6:22 this actually made me tear up a little.

  • @JeanMarceaux
    @JeanMarceaux 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The thumbnail is misleading: you don't care about perfectly level surfaces until your washing machine skidaddles all the way to Tampa, Florida due to vibrations. While you live on another continent.
    Jokes aside, this is a pretty good outlook on the problematic perfectionism, and something I need to teach myself to overcome.

  • @eyonfrankston1344
    @eyonfrankston1344 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    im a toxic perfectionist by the book - i get enraged at small trivial and inconsequential problems and throw and smash up or scream abuse at the problematic source (people included) and you can thank my last boss for that as he was like that with me, think gordon ramsay on meth (figuratively) that was him and thats what he moulded me to be even years later and outside of work

  • @aleisterlilywhite1109
    @aleisterlilywhite1109 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I haven’t painted in years for this very reason.

  • @DredFulProductions
    @DredFulProductions 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The master has failed more times than the beginner has even tried

  • @Waryfuls
    @Waryfuls 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    For some reason, I think of Gordon Ramsey when I think of "trying to achieve perfection"

  • @sherlockbones3519
    @sherlockbones3519 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hey Fads, I really enjoy your videos.
    I have one comment though, I find your videos really quiet, even when I raise the volume to the maximum.
    Could you maybe do something about that?
    Thanks.

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Noted! thanks for the tip!

  • @ghaida2349
    @ghaida2349 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you!

  • @Th3Gumbo
    @Th3Gumbo 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    This video is perfect

  • @aliveslice
    @aliveslice ปีที่แล้ว

    The fact that I cannot stand Kubrick's films and feel of Wes Anderson's films as "serviceable" should help me understand the drawbacks of perfectionism 😅 it really doesn't matter if most people call these creations perfect, I don't feel that way, so why would I bother? But it probably only speaks of a different view on perfection though 😥

  • @mmdullard
    @mmdullard 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    be a guest on the shoooooooooooow

  • @adaydreamhd
    @adaydreamhd 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    just a question... how can we save civilization or natre or both while in the 3rd mass extinction?

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I have no idea bro, this is way beyond me lmao

  • @troylater8614
    @troylater8614 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    This was bars

  • @scary5455
    @scary5455 ปีที่แล้ว

    Nice

  • @angeloselarja
    @angeloselarja 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    is this a personal attack? 😂

  • @aliveslice
    @aliveslice ปีที่แล้ว

    3:00 5:30

  • @avacadomangobanana2588
    @avacadomangobanana2588 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Go work for vox until your individual media brand is large enough to go solo

    • @Fads
      @Fads  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      hahaha Vox would literally be my dream job lol

  • @forfree6150
    @forfree6150 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Bro, you're cute, no homo